FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Profile text that turns you off
Profile text that turns you off
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So you get a wink and you look at the pictures and they look great and you think your luck is in. The sails of your hope are filled with the wind of expectation. So you turn to read the text only to be wrecked upon the rocks of disappointment. so the question is...what sort of things make you wince.
Here's our starter for ten.. HUGE LISTS IN CAPITALS ABOUT WHAT WE WONT DO - DON'T ASK IMMEDIATE BLOCK
over to you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Same, huge blocks of you will be blocked if you do X Y Z
some couples really think they are something special. Appreciate you need to set out what you are looking for but must be a limit without turning it into a dictatorship lol |
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"420 friendly
Yes.
Also. "we are a couple very much in love" means at least one of us is psychotically jealous and will kick off if my partner seems too into anyone else. "
Hahaha, I'm dying laughing over here  |
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‘Male has permission to play alone’ ( wife hasn’t a clue)
‘Only use kik’ (wife/hubby hasn’t a clue)
‘Nervous newbie couple’ (wife hasn’t a clue)
‘ separate room only’ (we get jealous watching each other with someone else)
‘Same room only’ (we get jealous if we can’t see exactly what our partner is doing )
‘Considerate smokers’ ( we will go stand in your garden to have a fag and that will stop our mouths smelling like old ashtrays’
‘420 friendly’ ( just warning you we will be reeking of )
‘Only ever meet in Clubs ‘ ( hubby a cuck who prefers to just watch the action )
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"‘Male has permission to play alone’ ( wife hasn’t a clue)
‘Only use kik’ (wife/hubby hasn’t a clue)
‘Nervous newbie couple’ (wife hasn’t a clue)
‘ separate room only’ (we get jealous watching each other with someone else)
‘Same room only’ (we get jealous if we can’t see exactly what our partner is doing )
‘Considerate smokers’ ( we will go stand in your garden to have a fag and that will stop our mouths smelling like old ashtrays’
‘420 friendly’ ( just warning you we will be reeking of )
‘Only ever meet in Clubs ‘ ( hubby a cuck who prefers to just watch the action )
"
And "discretion essential" (partner hasn't a clue and will only meet at yours during the hours of darkness)
"can't post pics due to my work" (partner hasn't a clue)
"can't accommodate as family often visits unexpectedly" (partner hasn't a clue)
"
(on a couples profile) "female not playing at the moment but male has permission to play" (partner hasn't a clue)
(also on a couple profile) "I'm the female and it really turns me on to find girls to fuck hubby" (I'm the male and my partner hasn't a clue) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's the lists of Sony's that are endless that bore me. Usually these people are all about what they don't want and tell nothing about the person(s).
Surely these profiles are about introductions and first impressions?
Oh.... and those "Sydney university" messages..... instant pass. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The ranters
Why do people not reply when I send a message?!!
Will only meet guys that are between the ages of 35 and 36
The checklisters
Do not send get in touch if you...and then list 25 things which you have to match
????
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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago
Wherever the party is! |
"‘Male has permission to play alone’ ( wife hasn’t a clue)
‘Only use kik’ (wife/hubby hasn’t a clue)
‘Nervous newbie couple’ (wife hasn’t a clue)
‘ separate room only’ (we get jealous watching each other with someone else)
‘Same room only’ (we get jealous if we can’t see exactly what our partner is doing )
‘Considerate smokers’ ( we will go stand in your garden to have a fag and that will stop our mouths smelling like old ashtrays’
‘420 friendly’ ( just warning you we will be reeking of )
‘Only ever meet in Clubs ‘ ( hubby a cuck who prefers to just watch the action )
And "discretion essential" (partner hasn't a clue and will only meet at yours during the hours of darkness)
"can't post pics due to my work" (partner hasn't a clue)
"can't accommodate as family often visits unexpectedly" (partner hasn't a clue)
"
(on a couples profile) "female not playing at the moment but male has permission to play" (partner hasn't a clue)
(also on a couple profile) "I'm the female and it really turns me on to find girls to fuck hubby" (I'm the male and my partner hasn't a clue) "
Brilliant!  |
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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago
Wherever the party is! |
Anyone with the Sydney University boilerplate c+p is basically saying that they lack independent thought and/or imagination. Personally, that doesn't say to me that we're going to have an interesting and/or fun play time.
The worst offenders the ones that include stuff about Facebook being a public listed company!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Huge ranty profiles that then state at the end 'I'm lovely really!'
Ones with a key word at the end to quote in a message to show you've read the profile. Just skip to the end to find it if you can't be arsed to read it all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Can't accommodate or won't meet smokers are the only two things I can think of that'd put me off. The rest of a profile is just noise as we'll decide whether to meet or not purely by the chat |
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"Quality over quantity.
I don't bite, unless you want me to.
Not here to shag the whole site.
No time wasters.
I'll fill this out later.
I'm an open book! Just ask.
"
I have no limits (which means i wont respect yours)
We're all here for the same thing (which means i wont respect your wishes)
I have a friend id love to share a woman with. (Looking for someone me n my mate can abuse)
Any name with 'security' or 'bouncer'
Whining about not being given a chance.
Large volumes of body hair in photos
Deodorant cans, sky remotes or underwear around the ankles...
Demands to see face pics...
Hahhaa
My block list is huge |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Loads, here is a few.....
Not here to shag the whole site = I think I’m something special
Professional couple = we think we are something special
Must have social only first = We will be interviewing you because we are special
Face pics with first message = I think I’m special
Please include a certain phrase in the title to show you’ve read the profile = Do as you are told because we are special
We have a life outside of Fab = gosh we really are special
Maybe there is a pattern?
 |
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Young at heart = old
Fit hot couple seek similar = what we see at in the mirror is different to what everyone else sees.
Athletic = we spend too much time in the gym honing our bodies but no time at all on our personalities.
Well hung = in my dreams
Can eat pussy for hours = I lack imagination
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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'If you've been on here for more than a year with no meets, then I'll/we'll block you'. I think some people don't realise how difficult it is to meet someone on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Quality over quantity.
I don't bite, unless you want me to.
Not here to shag the whole site.
No time wasters.
I'll fill this out later.
I'm an open book! Just ask.
"
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Loads, here is a few.....
Not here to shag the whole site = I think I’m something special
Professional couple = we think we are something special
Must have social only first = We will be interviewing you because we are special
Face pics with first message = I think I’m special
Please include a certain phrase in the title to show you’ve read the profile = Do as you are told because we are special
We have a life outside of Fab = gosh we really are special
Maybe there is a pattern?
"
hahahaha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Loads, here is a few.....
Not here to shag the whole site = I think I’m something special
Professional couple = we think we are something special
Must have social only first = We will be interviewing you because we are special
Face pics with first message = I think I’m special
Please include a certain phrase in the title to show you’ve read the profile = Do as you are told because we are special
We have a life outside of Fab = gosh we really are special
Maybe there is a pattern?
hahahaha "
Haha hilarious !!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People that look like a bag of spanners sayin ...must be special to contact them ... "
So true,the site is very empowering for women who look like a pork scratching |
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"People that look like a bag of spanners sayin ...must be special to contact them ...
So true,the site is very empowering for women who look like a pork scratching"
Maybe but it also tells a story of the guys that make them like this ? |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"People that look like a bag of spanners sayin ...must be special to contact them ...
So true,the site is very empowering for women who look like a pork scratching"
Or maybe that's what guys with a sense of entitlement about the site tell themselves to explain their lack of "success" here   |
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"Anyone with the Sydney University boilerplate c+p is basically saying that they lack independent thought and/or imagination. Personally, that doesn't say to me that we're going to have an interesting and/or fun play time.
The worst offenders the ones that include stuff about Facebook being a public listed company! "
Has anyone actually ever been sued? It confuses me no end this Sydney Uni stuff! |
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"
So true, the site is very empowering for women who look like a pork scratching"
Or full of guys that think they're the best fuck, the biggest prick (literally true for some guys on here), best stamina or best looking and oh how those women should be grateful they've chosen you, yes you, as the grateful recipient of their seed. Lucky you ladies
While some women on here aren't blessed with the best looking faces or bodies they are, at least, aware of the fact. They, at least, will have the personality to score. Some of the so called 'fit' hotties on this site aren't worthy to walk in the shadow of some of the 'women who look like a pork scratching' as they're all ego and nothing else. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Loads, here is a few.....
Not here to shag the whole site = I think I’m something special
Professional couple = we think we are something special
Must have social only first = We will be interviewing you because we are special
Face pics with first message = I think I’m special
Please include a certain phrase in the title to show you’ve read the profile = Do as you are told because we are special
We have a life outside of Fab = gosh we really are special
Maybe there is a pattern?
"
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"I'd say my profile has a few things that put people off!
Bloody hell youre a charmer aren’t you  "
Haha well speak your mind I say! And honestly I've had so many more messages since I changed it from what I had previously. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Professional
Must write a assay to contact us
No bad grammar
If I see any of the above in a profile I instantly think what a deluded self importance idiot x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Couples profiles where the guy is allowed to play alone (clearly she knows nothing about it) & he's posting pix of her without her knowledge to sly his way in with other couples.
Or, same as above, but he's clearly got a fantasy about her with other guys so he's trying to get us to "tell him what you'd do with her".
Single guys, we'll find you.
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'We're all here for the same thing' but saying nothing.
Similarly, ask any questions
Ranty moans about something
Photos that show someone who's highly different in each, so you're left uncertain how much different to the worst they'll be in real life
Half the length of the bible, with little useful content |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wife is away so only me playing"
Any profile that says they play bareback. Mentions of creampies and getting girls pregnant? I've been asked too many times if someone can get me pregnant... er no....
"Fill in later"
Ones that are too demanding "you must have 5 face pictures and do X,Y and Z faces in each one so I know you are real. Then you must beg for me to meet you and treat me like royalty. Bend to my every whim and be my bitch in the bedroom."
~Mia
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Couples - professional couple (we are better than you)
Couples again - looking for single man to satisfy the wife (Husband can’t do the job or wife bored with him)
Men - I can eat pussy for hours (you need to get out more lol).
Ha ha ha |
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