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Struggling to find attraction
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We have been on here on and off a long time now, but I’ve started finding it hard to find guys I’m attracted to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m too picky or wether looking at so many poor profiles and messages everyday has turned me off .
I would love to click on a profile and have that great feeling of attraction but it seems to have disappeared.
I still manage to find attraction when we go out to bars and sex clubs and also when we are away on holiday there’s always someone I fancy.
But on here it’s post , Has anyone else found this is the case after being on here awhile ?
Boobs  |
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I am the other way round, lots of ladies I am attracted to but not to me.
Seriously hope you find people on here you are attracted to and have lots of fun. There is no need for you to drop your standards at all.
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"Yeah, I’ve stopped looking for men altogether now and focus on women. I don’t know if it’s the profiles or what but somethings put me right off men haha"
I don’t want to stop looking for men as I enjoy threesomes too much. But saying that I don’t really tend to look at that many women’s profiles as it’s normally him that seeks them out.
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I've that issue too most of the time now... but every once in a very blue moon someone will make me look twice.
The forums and chat can be a good place to spot people of interest, as you can observe how they interact with others and form a more 3-dimensional impression of them than when you're only exchanging mail. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have been on here on and off a long time now, but I’ve started finding it hard to find guys I’m attracted to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m too picky or wether looking at so many poor profiles and messages everyday has turned me off .
I would love to click on a profile and have that great feeling of attraction but it seems to have disappeared.
I still manage to find attraction when we go out to bars and sex clubs and also when we are away on holiday there’s always someone I fancy.
But on here it’s post , Has anyone else found this is the case after being on here awhile ?
Boobs "
Well your not looking far away enough to find the good ones |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can count on my fingers the amount of guys I've been attracted to on here over the last couple of years....I'm really glad I'm already married to my sexy wolf or I think I'd end up a mad old cat lady  |
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"I've that issue too most of the time now... but every once in a very blue moon someone will make me look twice.
The forums and chat can be a good place to spot people of interest, as you can observe how they interact with others and form a more 3-dimensional impression of them than when you're only exchanging mail."
I think you may be right with this, not so much being in the forums(as a lot write what they think people want to hear so not always genuine ) but seeing people in the flesh rather than a message or profile might be the thing that attracts me more. Having the reality view (rather than the 10 second written profile and crap pics view). We did use the cam rooms a lot and made a fair few friends from it . So maybe that’s an option again. |
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"I can count on my fingers the amount of guys I've been attracted to on here over the last couple of years....I'm really glad I'm already married to my sexy wolf or I think I'd end up a mad old cat lady "
Ha ha yeah same all though mines more of a small bear than a wolf , love your shirts btw x |
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"I seem to find it extremely difficult the longer I'm on here tbh.
I need an influx of newbies to my area  "
Beards spent a week asking for face photos from guys and then sent every one to me and there was loads and not one made me get butterflies. It never used to be that way. And yes newbies may be the answer lol |
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"We have been on here on and off a long time now, but I’ve started finding it hard to find guys I’m attracted to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m too picky or wether looking at so many poor profiles and messages everyday has turned me off .
I would love to click on a profile and have that great feeling of attraction but it seems to have disappeared.
I still manage to find attraction when we go out to bars and sex clubs and also when we are away on holiday there’s always someone I fancy.
But on here it’s post , Has anyone else found this is the case after being on here awhile ?
Boobs "
Can’t say I have to be honest , but then massive attraction isn’t really what I’m looking for . I have that with my husband , so as long as they are clean and respectful , I’m not too bothered about that whole initial attraction .
Obviously there has to be a certain amount of attraction , but I’ve never looked for someone to give me that butterfly feeling . |
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"We have been on here on and off a long time now, but I’ve started finding it hard to find guys I’m attracted to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m too picky or wether looking at so many poor profiles and messages everyday has turned me off .
I would love to click on a profile and have that great feeling of attraction but it seems to have disappeared.
I still manage to find attraction when we go out to bars and sex clubs and also when we are away on holiday there’s always someone I fancy.
But on here it’s post , Has anyone else found this is the case after being on here awhile ?
Boobs
Can’t say I have to be honest , but then massive attraction isn’t really what I’m looking for . I have that with my husband , so as long as they are clean and respectful , I’m not too bothered about that whole initial attraction .
Obviously there has to be a certain amount of attraction , but I’ve never looked for someone to give me that butterfly feeling . "
I get that and I think a lot think that way even beards can be like that. But I want to have that butterfly feeling as it makes the whole experience so much better for me. |
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By *olarfoxMan
over a year ago
North Cambs |
"We have been on here on and off a long time now, but I’ve started finding it hard to find guys I’m attracted to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m too picky or wether looking at so many poor profiles and messages everyday has turned me off .
I would love to click on a profile and have that great feeling of attraction but it seems to have disappeared.
I still manage to find attraction when we go out to bars and sex clubs and also when we are away on holiday there’s always someone I fancy.
But on here it’s post , Has anyone else found this is the case after being on here awhile ?
Boobs
Can’t say I have to be honest , but then massive attraction isn’t really what I’m looking for . I have that with my husband , so as long as they are clean and respectful , I’m not too bothered about that whole initial attraction .
Obviously there has to be a certain amount of attraction , but I’ve never looked for someone to give me that butterfly feeling .
I get that and I think a lot think that way even beards can be like that. But I want to have that butterfly feeling as it makes the whole experience so much better for me. "
When you do get that 'butterfly feeling', is it primarily from how someone looks to you, or is it a combination of that and the way you get on after that initial attraction? What is it that gives you that feeling - do you know? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We given up looking for guys as most seems to of gone to the new fashion of bi lol and the rest ,would most likely be no shows or time wasters one that contact us obviously haven’t read our profile lol ,next to impossible to find a couple we both like too |
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"We have been on here on and off a long time now, but I’ve started finding it hard to find guys I’m attracted to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m too picky or wether looking at so many poor profiles and messages everyday has turned me off .
I would love to click on a profile and have that great feeling of attraction but it seems to have disappeared.
I still manage to find attraction when we go out to bars and sex clubs and also when we are away on holiday there’s always someone I fancy.
But on here it’s post , Has anyone else found this is the case after being on here awhile ?
Boobs
Can’t say I have to be honest , but then massive attraction isn’t really what I’m looking for . I have that with my husband , so as long as they are clean and respectful , I’m not too bothered about that whole initial attraction .
Obviously there has to be a certain amount of attraction , but I’ve never looked for someone to give me that butterfly feeling .
I get that and I think a lot think that way even beards can be like that. But I want to have that butterfly feeling as it makes the whole experience so much better for me.
When you do get that 'butterfly feeling', is it primarily from how someone looks to you, or is it a combination of that and the way you get on after that initial attraction? What is it that gives you that feeling - do you know?"
I would say if I’m out it would be how they look to start and then how they act and talk . There’s guys I fancy but then they act like dicks so the butterflies don’t start . But ones that actually smile and are nice to talk to start me getting excited and that’s when the butterflies start.
But I guess it’s really hard to get a sense of anything like that from a profile . |
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"We given up looking for guys as most seems to of gone to the new fashion of bi lol and the rest ,would most likely be no shows or time wasters one that contact us obviously haven’t read our profile lol ,next to impossible to find a couple we both like too "
What’s the new fashion of bi? |
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By *olarfoxMan
over a year ago
North Cambs |
"We have been on here on and off a long time now, but I’ve started finding it hard to find guys I’m attracted to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m too picky or wether looking at so many poor profiles and messages everyday has turned me off .
I would love to click on a profile and have that great feeling of attraction but it seems to have disappeared.
I still manage to find attraction when we go out to bars and sex clubs and also when we are away on holiday there’s always someone I fancy.
But on here it’s post , Has anyone else found this is the case after being on here awhile ?
Boobs
Can’t say I have to be honest , but then massive attraction isn’t really what I’m looking for . I have that with my husband , so as long as they are clean and respectful , I’m not too bothered about that whole initial attraction .
Obviously there has to be a certain amount of attraction , but I’ve never looked for someone to give me that butterfly feeling .
I get that and I think a lot think that way even beards can be like that. But I want to have that butterfly feeling as it makes the whole experience so much better for me.
When you do get that 'butterfly feeling', is it primarily from how someone looks to you, or is it a combination of that and the way you get on after that initial attraction? What is it that gives you that feeling - do you know?
I would say if I’m out it would be how they look to start and then how they act and talk . There’s guys I fancy but then they act like dicks so the butterflies don’t start . But ones that actually smile and are nice to talk to start me getting excited and that’s when the butterflies start.
But I guess it’s really hard to get a sense of anything like that from a profile . "
Do you not manage to get it on occasion when you connect with guys on here and start to engage in a bit of chat..just like you would in the bar/club, only by message obviously? |
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"We have been on here on and off a long time now, but I’ve started finding it hard to find guys I’m attracted to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m too picky or wether looking at so many poor profiles and messages everyday has turned me off .
I would love to click on a profile and have that great feeling of attraction but it seems to have disappeared.
I still manage to find attraction when we go out to bars and sex clubs and also when we are away on holiday there’s always someone I fancy.
But on here it’s post , Has anyone else found this is the case after being on here awhile ?
Boobs
Can’t say I have to be honest , but then massive attraction isn’t really what I’m looking for . I have that with my husband , so as long as they are clean and respectful , I’m not too bothered about that whole initial attraction .
Obviously there has to be a certain amount of attraction , but I’ve never looked for someone to give me that butterfly feeling . "
I’d agree with that  |
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"We have been on here on and off a long time now, but I’ve started finding it hard to find guys I’m attracted to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m too picky or wether looking at so many poor profiles and messages everyday has turned me off .
I would love to click on a profile and have that great feeling of attraction but it seems to have disappeared.
I still manage to find attraction when we go out to bars and sex clubs and also when we are away on holiday there’s always someone I fancy.
But on here it’s post , Has anyone else found this is the case after being on here awhile ?
Boobs
Can’t say I have to be honest , but then massive attraction isn’t really what I’m looking for . I have that with my husband , so as long as they are clean and respectful , I’m not too bothered about that whole initial attraction .
Obviously there has to be a certain amount of attraction , but I’ve never looked for someone to give me that butterfly feeling .
I get that and I think a lot think that way even beards can be like that. But I want to have that butterfly feeling as it makes the whole experience so much better for me.
When you do get that 'butterfly feeling', is it primarily from how someone looks to you, or is it a combination of that and the way you get on after that initial attraction? What is it that gives you that feeling - do you know?
I would say if I’m out it would be how they look to start and then how they act and talk . There’s guys I fancy but then they act like dicks so the butterflies don’t start . But ones that actually smile and are nice to talk to start me getting excited and that’s when the butterflies start.
But I guess it’s really hard to get a sense of anything like that from a profile .
Do you not manage to get it on occasion when you connect with guys on here and start to engage in a bit of chat..just like you would in the bar/club, only by message obviously?"
I did when we first started as there was the new adventure and it seemed easier then to find the attraction and then the excitement . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think there are too few new people coming onto the scene. Not sure what the reasons for that are, I shall ruminate on that.
The few that do come on are either UNLOS within 12 hours, are just here for a nosey and aren't actually interested in talking to anyone or are only here for the same 5-10 guys in a given area that every woman and male seeking couple are constantly passing round.
For the record, no, this does not mean I have a problem with "choice" or anything like that. But there does have to be consideration of at what point do we cease to be a community of swingers and start being a loosely associated group of orbiters for a few VVVWE bulls. Expectations are certainly already at the point where it massively impedes the free exchange of equally matched partners. The sexual marketplace is heading towards hyperinflation so to speak. |
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By *olarfoxMan
over a year ago
North Cambs |
"We have been on here on and off a long time now, but I’ve started finding it hard to find guys I’m attracted to. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m too picky or wether looking at so many poor profiles and messages everyday has turned me off .
I would love to click on a profile and have that great feeling of attraction but it seems to have disappeared.
I still manage to find attraction when we go out to bars and sex clubs and also when we are away on holiday there’s always someone I fancy.
But on here it’s post , Has anyone else found this is the case after being on here awhile ?
Boobs
Can’t say I have to be honest , but then massive attraction isn’t really what I’m looking for . I have that with my husband , so as long as they are clean and respectful , I’m not too bothered about that whole initial attraction .
Obviously there has to be a certain amount of attraction , but I’ve never looked for someone to give me that butterfly feeling .
I get that and I think a lot think that way even beards can be like that. But I want to have that butterfly feeling as it makes the whole experience so much better for me.
When you do get that 'butterfly feeling', is it primarily from how someone looks to you, or is it a combination of that and the way you get on after that initial attraction? What is it that gives you that feeling - do you know?
I would say if I’m out it would be how they look to start and then how they act and talk . There’s guys I fancy but then they act like dicks so the butterflies don’t start . But ones that actually smile and are nice to talk to start me getting excited and that’s when the butterflies start.
But I guess it’s really hard to get a sense of anything like that from a profile .
Do you not manage to get it on occasion when you connect with guys on here and start to engage in a bit of chat..just like you would in the bar/club, only by message obviously?
I did when we first started as there was the new adventure and it seemed easier then to find the attraction and then the excitement . "
I find in my case, the excitement kind of ebbs and flows. I will have a period of a few months when I really get into fab and all the excitement and exhilaration comes flooding back. After a while, however, I kind of lose my 'fab mojo' and simply find myself drifting away into things completely unrelated...
I do think it is hard to find the right people on fab (and I'm not just talking for single males) without making a big effort and investing quite a lot of time...when the mojo and general excitement level from the site disappears for a bit, then it is difficult to do this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I (Miss) struggle to find men attractive, I would like to try an mmf threesome, but I just can't find a guy that I am even remotely attracted to, I have no problem finding women attractive. |
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