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Biggest cliches on Fab

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By *hamboy69 OP Man over a year ago

huddersfield

I’ll start the bowl rolling

“Seduce my mind and my body will follow “

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By *rimson_RoseWoman over a year ago

Tamworth

I don't bite, unless you ask me too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oh, how about " recently single" on a profile that hasn't been updated in 18 months....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m not here to sleep my way through the site ..

(127 verifications ..)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

‘Only here for the forums’

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fill in later been on for years no pics

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

'New to all this' on a profile that's been on over a year

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm on here with the wife's permission

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By *innie The MinxWoman over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Hi this is the male half of the couple

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

'Fun guy looking for meets'

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By *iReyWoman over a year ago

Cheshire East

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN, You are hereby notified that you are strictly prohibited from disclosing, copying, distributing, disseminating, or taking any other action against me with regard to this profile and the contents herein, including, but not limited to my photos, and/or the comments made about my photos or any other "picture" art posted on my profile. The foregoing prohibitions also apply to your employee, agent, student or any personnel under your direction or control. The contents of this profile are private and legally privileged and confidential information, and the violation of my personal privacy is punishable by law.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hi! I'm a genuine normal guy...

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By *hamboy69 OP Man over a year ago

huddersfield

There’s some good obsverations on here but I think this one has been missed

“I have a life outside Fab “

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By *hamboy69 OP Man over a year ago

huddersfield

"I'm on here with the wife's permission"
yeah sure

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By *arryklMan over a year ago

Hinckley

How about treat her with respect or I’ve had enough I’m leaving tonight those that know me please message me before next Monday when my £5 membership fee is needing to be renewed

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By *hamboy69 OP Man over a year ago

huddersfield

"Fill in later been on for years no pics

"
They have obviously been very busy

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By *hekaiserMan over a year ago

Glasgow

"You know who you are..."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm not here as a cock tease...honest x

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By *hamboy69 OP Man over a year ago

huddersfield

"TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN, You are hereby notified that you are strictly prohibited from disclosing, copying, distributing, disseminating, or taking any other action against me with regard to this profile and the contents herein, including, but not limited to my photos, and/or the comments made about my photos or any other "picture" art posted on my profile. The foregoing prohibitions also apply to your employee, agent, student or any personnel under your direction or control. The contents of this profile are private and legally privileged and confidential information, and the violation of my personal privacy is punishable by law."
where would we be without Sidney

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By *inful xWoman over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

Can breathe through my ears

Bore off

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Quality over quantity

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Discrete..genuine...respectful..

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By *sprey6Man over a year ago

Here!

Professional!!!

That may be o mine though

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Professional!!!

That may be o mine though

Better still when they spell it proffesional

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By *wisted2000Woman over a year ago

under my rock cleethorpes

I can give oral for hours

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By *sprey6Man over a year ago

Here!

"Professional!!!

That may be o mine though

Better still when they spell it proffesional

PMSL x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Must be discreet.discrete..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Submission is all about

Communication

Trust

Is a gift

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By *aycee70Couple over a year ago

Eastbourne

Very clean!

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

No timewasters please.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

“Reply using my secret code word”

~ if you can find the fecking thing located within the midsts of long rambling profile text

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By *athers123Man over a year ago

Harpenden

'Not being racist, just my preference'

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By *rp861Man over a year ago

Devizes

Fun couple looking for fun with fun people in fun surroundings in the centre of fun town.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m fab straight...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Need to know anything, just ask

yeah right!

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By *issyme555TV/TS over a year ago

Motherwell

Please be able to hold a intelligent conversation. So you write a big message and get a one word response.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No one reads profiles anyway"

And insert code word to make sure youve read my profile

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By *niper oneMan over a year ago

DERBY/Notts border

'Easy on the eye'

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Please be able to hold a intelligent conversation. So you write a big message and get a one word response.

Yeah always seems to be those people who then only talk about sex or themselves cannot hold a conversation...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"'Not being racist....'"

...but I'm going to ignore you solely based on your race."

This is a dictionary definition of racism!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"'Easy on the eye'"

Yes you are....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Been on here before, know how it works....so what?!

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By *entileschiWoman over a year ago

Norwich

Genuine, honest guy here. Married, and wife doesn't know I'm on here.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Having a guy apply to meet you as if he is writing a CV. I don't care if your a professional banker and have 2 degrees.

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By *agermeisterMan over a year ago

Leeds

"SINGLE GUYS PLEASE READ OUR PROFILE"

"ATTACH FACE PICS OR YOU WILL BE BLOCKED!!"

"NOT LOOKING FOR MEETS RIGHT NOW"

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By *agermeisterMan over a year ago

Leeds

"I don't do small talk"

Send a message talking about significant stuff

"Why are you interrogating me like a sadistic school teacher?"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No timewasters please."

Meaning “timewasters don’t try and play our game” those with this on there profile are sometimes absolute timewasters themselves!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No timewasters please.

Meaning “timewasters don’t try and play our game” those with this on there profile are sometimes absolute timewasters themselves!

I seriously don't get the "no timewasters" thing. Like someone reading it will go, oh dear better not contact them I am a timewaster...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

“No cock pics, I know what one looks like.”

(their profile is full of pussy pics)

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By *lceeWoman over a year ago

Leeds

If you contact me tlkng lik dis I will delete.

If you have no profile pic I will delete.

If your message is just ‘hi’ or ‘hey there’ I will delete.

If you mail me asking to meet you right now, I will delete

No attached men.

No single men.

No bisexual men

Quality over quantity.

Safe sex is a must (ok, that one is on mine)

Reading some profiles is like those old boards in leisure centre swimming pools promising dire retribution for bombing and heavy petting.

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By *lceeWoman over a year ago

Leeds

Oh, and ‘smells good’. Well, what if I don’t like your particular brand of cologne?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Very well hung"

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By *ex-a-frolicsCouple over a year ago

Brizzle

No glove no love & all pictures with random males are Bareback.

Deleted all my messages sorry had too many.

Can go down on a woman for hours (surely if you need to be down there that long you’re not doing it right?)

Wet but not in a good way.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Young and hard on cam ready to cum"

In chat rooms lol

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

Heavy cummer

I detest that....makes me want to womit when I read it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't meet I'm just here to chat to close friends

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"I don't meet I'm just here to chat to close friends

That’ll be me then.....am I bothered? Nooooo.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

In a message received at 3pm

‘I’ll be in my hotel room between 4pm and 6pm. Can you meet for wet and horny fun ‘

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"In a message received at 3pm

‘I’ll be in my hotel room between 4pm and 6pm. Can you meet for wet and horny fun ‘

I find the word ‘fun’ annoying.

To me fun is shopping or for people who like it bowling!

‘Fun’ ! Nooop

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/02/18 08:31:37]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can't put bi as all my mates, and all their mates mates or on here"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't meet I'm just here to chat to close friends

That’ll be me then.....am I bothered? Nooooo.

"
bovvered

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Single guys, we will find you when we need you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

“This ones a keeper”, “Hands of he/she is mine” in verifications....followed by dozens of other verifications in the next few weeks....so obviously didn’t keep them. (Add in the usual “sucks like a dyson” type ones....do you really want your cock turned inside out?)

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"Single guys, we will find you when we need you"

Hilarious.....

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By *ex-a-frolicsCouple over a year ago

Brizzle

Horny as hell cock needs draining now!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

People responding to forum posts regarding particular tastes with sheer disgust that anyone could find such things a turn on. You're on a swinging site judging other peoples tastes and desires!! If it doesn't fit with your tastes they must be wrong. Should be under the how fab makes me laugh post rather than clichés but some people on here just amaze me.

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

Don’t pass this guy/girl by....

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By *LIRTWITHUSCouple over a year ago

Chester

Couples profile he's straight - in write up he's bi complicated wtf is that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bring your arm bands.

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By *unfriends1976Couple over a year ago

Darlington

Not looking to meet the whole site

Is anyone actually trying to meet the whole site, I know it's good to set goals, but this one is a tough one

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I hate too read on a profile easy going ,go with the flow .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Great night last night. Thank you for leaving me a total wreck. You know who you are."

Meaning I can't get any meets will someone quiz me on this status so at least I get some messages.

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By *ccasionalfunCouple over a year ago

hereandthere

Single man only meets in daytime and can't accom

Single woman only meets with partner

Treat with respect...I mean why? Is it a pissing on lamp post thing ?

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By *ccasionalfunCouple over a year ago

hereandthere

Single men status update of " sorry working through mail" haha yeah whatever unless David gandy is on here

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’ll start the bowl rolling

“Seduce my mind and my body will follow “"

This is an actual thing for me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’ll start the bowl rolling

“Seduce my mind and my body will follow “

This is an actual thing for me

"
is your mind detachable then

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Single men status update of " sorry working through mail" haha yeah whatever unless David gandy is on here "

David Gandy is here? Whoop! Let me at him

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By *09309309Woman over a year ago

Dublin

Not new to this, I've been here before and was extremely popular and well verified but deleted my account

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

No punctuation.

#ihavebeenherebe4andknothescorenotheretofukallthesightandicanonlymeetschooldaysbetween9and5pastandimnothereforyourentertanememt...

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By *irky_coupleCouple over a year ago

kirky

"Attach a face pic or no reply" from a profile with no pics at all.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

CAPITAL LETTERS EVERYWHERE TO ILLUSTRATE A POINT

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"“This ones a keeper”, “Hands of he/she is mine” in verifications....followed by dozens of other verifications in the next few weeks....so obviously didn’t keep them. (Add in the usual “sucks like a dyson” type ones....do you really want your cock turned inside out?)"

And long and very detailed verifications, i dont what a play by play of your meet with them and neither does anyone else

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I can't show a face pic as I work in the public domain

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By *atEvolutionCouple over a year ago

atlantisEVOLUTION. Stoke.

Hows you doin (SIC)

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By *laydocMan over a year ago

West Midlands

"No timewasters please.

Meaning “timewasters don’t try and play our game” those with this on there profile are sometimes absolute timewasters themselves!

I seriously don't get the "no timewasters" thing. Like someone reading it will go, oh dear better not contact them I am a timewaster...

Entirely agree.The irony is that in all probability making such a stipulation is a waste of time!

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By *urvymamaWoman over a year ago

Doncaster

Satisfaction Guarenteed

(Generally means they’re a spectacularly shit shag)

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By *laydocMan over a year ago

West Midlands

"I don't bite, unless you ask me too.

Or "well not much anyway"

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By *urvymamaWoman over a year ago

Doncaster

I’ve read your profile

When it’s obvious they haven’t

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By *09309309Woman over a year ago

Dublin

"Satisfaction Guarenteed

(Generally means they’re a spectacularly shit shag)"

I never understood that one. Like, what are they going to do if I complain? Give me a Domino's voucher as compensation?

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By *urvymamaWoman over a year ago

Doncaster

"Satisfaction Guarenteed

(Generally means they’re a spectacularly shit shag)

I never understood that one. Like, what are they going to do if I complain? Give me a Domino's voucher as compensation?

Well in my experience you get told

“You were shit too”

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Needless to say, I went home with a smile on my face.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

He's got a very suckable cock

Never see the point of that comment.

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By *ex-a-frolicsCouple over a year ago

Brizzle

We are spotlessly clean and smell nice, let us be the judge of that, like you would say anything to the contrary!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’ll start the bowl rolling

“Seduce my mind and my body will follow “

This is an actual thing for me

is your mind detachable then

Nope it simply means if you can stimulate my mind them my body will follow.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Satisfaction Guarenteed

(Generally means they’re a spectacularly shit shag)"

Yep lol

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

We are a couple very much in love.

Like we needed to know that...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hi! I'm a genuine normal guy..."

I'm sure you used this on me Whamboy lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Must attach face pic or blocked.

- have no face pics on their profile.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This one is just inane...

- treat her/them with respect.

Like why would you disrespect someone you just had fun with

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By *ain n MableWoman over a year ago

Milton Keynes

"We do not meet single guys"

Verifications= 25 men. 1 couple.

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

‘Looking for that elusive unicorn’

Maybe check in the library under fiction!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"‘Looking for that elusive unicorn’

Maybe check in the library under fiction!!!

"
women and couples only ,single men do not message you will be blocked

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I can gush like Niagara

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"anything you want to know just ask" as a one-line profile. Er no actually, I'll just move on to someone who's taken the trouble to write something informative

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I read. Single married male on one profile. If they married how they single?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've set my filters to block all men but I'm still getting messages ,you have to see my face right now one eyebrow is higher than the other

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By *loria JamesTV/TS over a year ago

Durham

"If you contact me tlkng lik dis I will delete.

If you have no profile pic I will delete.

If your message is just ‘hi’ or ‘hey there’ I will delete.

If you mail me asking to meet you right now, I will delete

No attached men.

No single men.

No bisexual men

Quality over quantity.

Safe sex is a must (ok, that one is on mine)

Reading some profiles is like those old boards in leisure centre swimming pools promising dire retribution for bombing and heavy petting.

Omg that's mine x

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

‘Howz u babe?’

Babe? Babe? Piglet film...!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

That single guys have to go to Socials to get meets.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"‘Howz u babe?’

Babe? Babe? Piglet film...! "
such a cute little piggy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can't message on here send your email..."

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"‘Howz u babe?’

Babe? Babe? Piglet film...! such a cute little piggy

Well I do like all things covered in fur!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Quality not quantity

Do pass this one up ladies

Sucks like a dyson

“Single”

Fab “straight”

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By *ntensekisserMan over a year ago

Liverpool

Anything with the words "Sydney University" on them

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

‘Cannot accommodate’

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By *ollyGWoman over a year ago

Southampton

"Can breathe through my ears

Bore off "

I hate that one too!

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

‘I can stay hard all night’

Yeah right go see your GP.

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By *ex-a-frolicsCouple over a year ago

Brizzle

You’ve tried the rest now try the best, oh wait did I also see that on an Ice Cream van?

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By *itzimadCouple over a year ago

harwich

no bi guys is the one that always makes me smile like their going to tell you now

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

‘I can assure you I’m a Gentleman’

No words! Not seen any yet on Fab! I said ‘yet’.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you remember me from before, please verify me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

“Accidentally deleted our profile”

Entered your password twice and then wrote I understand in the box

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’ll reply

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By *ar madMan over a year ago

Dublin

Not meeting at the moment, it's a swingers site not twitter or facebook!!

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"Not meeting at the moment, it's a swingers site not twitter or facebook!! "

Oooooh that’s me then! You forgot Instagram

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"‘Howz u babe?’

Babe? Babe? Piglet film...! such a cute little piggy

Well I do like all things covered in fur!!! "
wild boars and skunks noooooo

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"‘Howz u babe?’

Babe? Babe? Piglet film...! such a cute little piggy

Well I do like all things covered in fur!!! wild boars and skunks noooooo

Wild boars and skunks need lurve too

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"‘Howz u babe?’

Babe? Babe? Piglet film...! such a cute little piggy

Well I do like all things covered in fur!!! wild boars and skunks noooooo

Wild boars and skunks need lurve too

"
but they smell

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you remember me from before, please verify me "
I do but no sorry ........cant

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not meeting at the moment, it's a swingers site not twitter or facebook!!

Oooooh that’s me then! You forgot Instagram "

Me too...Lol I have my reasons, doesn't mean I want to lose touch!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not meeting at the moment, it's a swingers site not twitter or facebook!!

Oooooh that’s me then! You forgot Instagram

Me too...Lol I have my reasons, doesn't mean I want to lose touch!"
do you have a problem with nerves ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not meeting at the moment, it's a swingers site not twitter or facebook!!

Oooooh that’s me then! You forgot Instagram

Me too...Lol I have my reasons, doesn't mean I want to lose touch!do you have a problem with nerves ?

Nerves are grand, thanks for asking

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

‘She’s got an amazing tasting pussy, fellas treat her right’

Yawn

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Real women have curves

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"‘She’s got an amazing tasting pussy, fellas treat her right’

Yawn "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m not here to sleep my way through the site ..

(127 verifications ..)"

love this one so true

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Must be gym fit with tattoos.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"‘She’s got an amazing tasting pussy, fellas treat her right’

Yawn "
how do you know?

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By *ccasionalfunCouple over a year ago

hereandthere

"Hows you doin (SIC)"

As soon as someone says "yous" instead of you or your the message is deleted

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By *sGivesWoodWoman over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

No single guys (so block them from messaging!!)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have a life outside Fab.

And they are online every time you click their profile.

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By *layalongCouple over a year ago

Edinburgh

[Removed by poster at 17/02/18 07:36:15]

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By *layalongCouple over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Horny as hell cock needs draining now!"

Nearly threw up

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"I have a life outside Fab.

And they are online every time you click their profile. "

To be fair they may have Fab on in the background permanently whilst enjoying life outside of Fab!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Treat with respect and you will be rewarded

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By *ornLordMan over a year ago

Wiltshire and London

"Must be discreet.discrete.."

Rather than continuous?

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"Treat with respect and you will be rewarded"

With a blue peter badge perhaps?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Currently not meeting but has a meet today request for the next three weekends

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hows you doin (SIC)

As soon as someone says "yous" instead of you or your the message is deleted "

Its maybe a Belfast thing, I say this but only when I'm referring to more than one person. Could be worse, could be yousuns instead.

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By *illy big bolloxMan over a year ago

Newark

Cant acommadate, cant travel!!

Send face pic for a reply (yea right)

As said earlier on the forum, dont want to sleep my way through fab (217 verifications) is that right.

100% clean but loves bareback (really)

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

‘Want to keep him all to myself’

That special is he?

and

‘He has such a tasty cock’

Like a Chinese takeaway is it?

Yawn....

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By *L79Man over a year ago

Home

Photos don’t do him / her justice.

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

‘Don’t let this one slip by’

Yep I’ll grab him if he slips by me....literally!

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By *av_55Man over a year ago

The best is if you get to meet her treat her with respect,,, as apposed to what??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

“Will fill in later” (usually still there six months after joining)

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"“Will fill in later” (usually still there six months after joining)"

A form perhaps? Wonder what lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hows you doin (SIC)

As soon as someone says "yous" instead of you or your the message is deleted

Its maybe a Belfast thing, I say this but only when I'm referring to more than one person. Could be worse, could be yousuns instead."

Steer clear if they say, "we don't meet them'uns"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's not match.com...

It's not Instashag...

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

‘Meet me it’s a sex site ffs’

Is it? Lol.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You may have well just posted my profile! Hahaha

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By *ickeyblueeyes7Man over a year ago

newport

Please send face pics when they have no pics whatsoever

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hows you doin (SIC)

As soon as someone says "yous" instead of you or your the message is deleted

Its maybe a Belfast thing, I say this but only when I'm referring to more than one person. Could be worse, could be yousuns instead.

Steer clear if they say, "we don't meet them'uns""

I think maybe we have both lived in NI too long

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No single guys (so block them from messaging!!) "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Straight guy... veris from tvs etc...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Don't want to go into too much detail cos I want him/her all to myself. ..errrr warning signs.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Must have a 8" plus cock so a 7" that can go all night isn't any good to you ?

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By *inecrestMan over a year ago

West Yorks

I regard them more as good friends.

(They're probably thinking "Sorry, which one is he again?")

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m not here to sleep my way through the site ..

(127 verifications ..)"

Out of at least 25000 (seems to be the average amount online at any one time) members? Hardly all the site

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Hows you doin (SIC)

As soon as someone says "yous" instead of you or your the message is deleted

Its maybe a Belfast thing, I say this but only when I'm referring to more than one person. Could be worse, could be yousuns instead.

Steer clear if they say, "we don't meet them'uns"

I think maybe we have both lived in NI too long

Thats entirely possible

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

‘When I say I’ll meet I’ll meet’

Why say it if you’ll meet, how confusing....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"'Not being racist, just my preference'"
lol that’s on ours and I’m not interested in any colour to play with sorry

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By *hubaysiWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"'Not being racist, just my preference' lol that’s on ours and I’m not interested in any colour to play with sorry "

Or even more racist, people actually naming a culture

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oh you cynical people!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Oh you cynical people!!

Never

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"‘When I say I’ll meet I’ll meet’

Why say it if you’ll meet, how confusing...."
I'm straight ,please don't call me babe and if you don't live within 5 miles and accom you will be blocked

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