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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm intrigued to know about other guys experiences on this site. We all know that we very heavily outnumber the ladies on the site, but do your messaging experiences mirror mine? I only message a lady if i meet what she is looking for, age etc. If I send 20 messages, I reckon 16 will never get looked at, 3 will get read, but deleted with no reply. 1 will get a reply of some sort, a no thanks or a nice chat. Is that the sort of ratio other guys experience? |
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OP your experiences are similar to many others but there are people who have much more success.
There are things you can do to help yourself in this respect.
I'm not allowed to make comment on your profile because you haven't asked for it, so I will give you a little generic advice.
When most ladies and couples receive a message the first thing they do is look at your profile. If they don't see anything to pique their interest they will just delete your message and move on to the next one.
Perhaps a forum search for profile advice would give you some useful tips. |
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For the gentlemen who have messaged me privately to ask for profile advice, please everyone in the forums. You can make a new thread asking for profile advice.
There are lots of people on here who can help you and are happy to do so. My opinion is just one point of view and others will have other suggestions for you that may be more helpful.
You might get a few unhelpful replies but on the whole the forums are a friendly place full of people who are willing and able to help you.
Good luck guys  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm intrigued to know about other guys experiences on this site. We all know that we very heavily outnumber the ladies on the site, but do your messaging experiences mirror mine? I only message a lady if i meet what she is looking for, age etc. If I send 20 messages, I reckon 16 will never get looked at, 3 will get read, but deleted with no reply. 1 will get a reply of some sort, a no thanks or a nice chat. Is that the sort of ratio other guys experience? "
That’s about the norm I reckon Bud, but it’s so unpredictable, sometimes I can go weeks with no replies and then sometimes I juggling messages. My last meet came from just changing my status and someone sent me a message from that! But it’s very, very rare that I get a message out the blue like that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As long as the guys realise no one is obliged to reply
Bit like getting junk mail through your letterbox
If your not interested you don't read it and bin it .
Just carry on browsing and messaging in a nice polite adult manner and see where it leads |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Think the main thing is to read the profiles and try to only communicate with the ones you stand a chance with ?
Also don't cut and paste ? Everyone is different and deserves a individual message ?
Worked for me when a single guy on site and now in a couple ! |
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I think those stats would be envied by most of the guys here.
Do you mean of your messages in total, or ones where you are making an initial contact?
I reckon just over half of mine are read, but that includes people I'm in long conversations with, so if it's the former, well done Sir.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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getting to organised socials is the best thing to do, you need to network yourself that way, it’s difficult to get your personality across with words and can be taken the wrong way at times.
so best advice i can give is go to socials  |
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"Think the main thing is to read the profiles and try to only communicate with the ones you stand a chance with ?
Also don't cut and paste ? Everyone is different and deserves a individual message !"
Another take on this might be...
Everyone is different, but you can't possibly know in what way until after you've actually spoken to them..
Therefore, I can see a place for messages which change very little in content, but give a greeting and a little information about the person sending it. I don't agree that every single message has to be unique and specific to an individual or couple. It is indeed just an invitation to check out your amazing profile and pictures before deciding how to progress.. |
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OP.You have been on a week and already have a verification..
That's pretty good, you have had at least one meet..
As for profile advice, my feeling is just be yourself as to follow Mary,Jane,Lisa etc will make you something they want rather than wbat you want.
Patience is the key.
Best of luck. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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That reply fascinated me. I have always thought that if a lady sent 20 messages to 20 guys, then she would get 20 replies. I’m interested to hear that might not be the case. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That reply fascinated me. I have always thought that if a lady sent 20 messages to 20 guys, then she would get 20 replies. I’m interested to hear that might not be the case. "
I thought that, the guys that received them probably collapsed in shock and couldn’t reply. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Think to much emphasis is on getting meets or hoping for more .just be polite and join in on forums im off to a social soon so looking forward to that .messages prob get deleted unread if whoever recieves it doesnt like your pic and just bins it .dont give in tho its good fun on here ive made some good friends and had a couple of meets that blew my socks off ...literally  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm intrigued to know about other guys experiences on this site. We all know that we very heavily outnumber the ladies on the site, but do your messaging experiences mirror mine? I only message a lady if i meet what she is looking for, age etc. If I send 20 messages, I reckon 16 will never get looked at, 3 will get read, but deleted with no reply. 1 will get a reply of some sort, a no thanks or a nice chat. Is that the sort of ratio other guys experience? "
Yep! I am In the same boat OP but i probably get a sympathetic reply once every 50 messages i send. The problem i am facing now is that i dont see anybody new within my search radius and the last thing i want to do is piss couples or single females off by sending them a message again knowing that they never paid much attention to my profile in the first place
Its not easy and can be soul destroying at times |
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