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What is the confusion over NSA?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I wonder if others come across this NSA situation when a person says that they want NSA and then they start to get all broody and heavy? To me, NSA means No Strings Attached which I am fully aware of, and would like to maintain. Like others, I have just come out of a heavy long-term relationship, the last thing I want is for someone to start tell me how and when I should have my fun. So why is it that if you know that the fun is NSA, that some people like to making a noose to go around your neck either before a meet or after just one meet? Surely we all knew the score before we got in contact with person for NSA Fun. I don't know if this the same thing for guys with women, but from my side, I seem to be having guys that have got in touch trying to start to tell me what to do, and this in its turn makes me want to run the opposite way. Am I being awful in thinking this way? I don't know I thought swinging was suppose to be fun without the NSA or am I wrong about this? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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no your not being funny infact your right to think that way, NSA means just that no strings meet. You can have a NSA meet though with a dom/sub element where one tells the other what to do in the bedroom etc, but is just for that senario. NSA is just that no strings attached and to be fair most swinging meets are just that and implied, unless one of the parties are stating they are looking for a FB someone to go swinging with to parties, or meet leading to a relationship etc as some on here do put things like that in their profiles. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In relation to swinging, I thing most men get clingy and arsey with women who have other meets, not necessarily because they have fallen in love and want to be with that woman, but because they want regular sex.
If the tables were turned and men were in demand and us ladies were struggling to get regular meets, then you'd find a lot less of the clingy and needy guys.
Its because they aren't getting enough meets to their liking, that when they find a woman who has met them, and they have a great time, then they think she is more likely to meet them again.
Even I get guys who make comments when they see I've played with someone else. Why the hell get clingy with me, I'm part of a couple.
Of course there are ladies who, whilst not outwardly looking for a relationship, are looking for more than nsa. There seem to be a lot of FBs spring up and make couples profiles which would suggest they are happy to become part of a twosome and play regularly with couples. Whilst this is not a relationship, I would say its not entirely nsa either. And there are many jealous comments made from ladies fighting over a sexy guy, why get upset about that if its all on a one night basis anyway  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder if others come across this NSA situation when a person says that they want NSA and then they start to get all broody and heavy? To me, NSA means No Strings Attached which I am fully aware of, and would like to maintain. Like others, I have just come out of a heavy long-term relationship, the last thing I want is for someone to start tell me how and when I should have my fun. So why is it that if you know that the fun is NSA, that some people like to making a noose to go around your neck either before a meet or after just one meet? Surely we all knew the score before we got in contact with person for NSA Fun. I don't know if this the same thing for guys with women, but from my side, I seem to be having guys that have got in touch trying to start to tell me what to do, and this in its turn makes me want to run the opposite way. Am I being awful in thinking this way? I don't know I thought swinging was suppose to be fun without the NSA or am I wrong about this? "
You find people start out looking for one thing and then want more. Sometimes its just another meet others people get clingy. The worst are often women if i am honest and know a few men who have had bunny boiler problems. You just have to point things out with people and if it gets complicated walk away. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder if others come across this NSA situation when a person says that they want NSA and then they start to get all broody and heavy? To me, NSA means No Strings Attached which I am fully aware of, and would like to maintain. Like others, I have just come out of a heavy long-term relationship, the last thing I want is for someone to start tell me how and when I should have my fun. So why is it that if you know that the fun is NSA, that some people like to making a noose to go around your neck either before a meet or after just one meet? Surely we all knew the score before we got in contact with person for NSA Fun. I don't know if this the same thing for guys with women, but from my side, I seem to be having guys that have got in touch trying to start to tell me what to do, and this in its turn makes me want to run the opposite way. Am I being awful in thinking this way? I don't know I thought swinging was suppose to be fun without the NSA or am I wrong about this?
You find people start out looking for one thing and then want more. Sometimes its just another meet others people get clingy. The worst are often women if i am honest and know a few men who have had bunny boiler problems. You just have to point things out with people and if it gets complicated walk away. "
Must agree with Katie, as a single guy have had trouble with women who have been single or in couples who decide they have feelings and want more even though both parties have at the start said not looking for relationship etc, its understandable to develop feelings for others you meet regular though. as a single woman the ones i have met have all had a problem at some time with a posesive bloke off here so its quite common for it to happen, you have to be totally honest on first meeting or contact that not looking for anything other than sex, dont need to be rude just honest with those you meet. xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I agree with Iconic about some men wanting regular sex hence getting a bit territorial. Just be clear up front about what you're looking for and not looking for and if anyone over steps your boundaries or makes you feel uncomfortable then tell them to jog on and block them. Ms |
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Had a NSA meet last Friday, though was someone had gone out with some two years earlier.
We broke originally up as she moved and started a very busy course, and had a little one (from previous marriage) too. Then she started to see someone a year ago, but would phone to ask for sex advice as he was 'crap in bed'.
Alas this appears to have awoken strings in her, a mixture of good sex and friendship.
Not that I mind, but she is struggling I think with my swing nature that has come out in the last year. Oddly arising from the many whispered fantasies when having sex. What I've been doing should be no surprise, as have been open about it all.
Brain is now bouncing around the I enjoy things here and at clubs, but also enjoy her company both in bed and out of it.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What I find really strange is the fact, that people know what the site is all about.
I could be an oddball then, because I don't care who the guy sleeps with because upfront its NSA Fun.
However, on the other hand, if he thought I was sitting at home pining for him, think again, because I would want NSA Fun too.
It might just be me, but the more you try to tie a guy down, the more he would probably run away.
Surely you can have a regular FB and still have fun elsewhere, either together or separate, for me surely if you meet someone in this kind of setting it is only natural for people to want to explore. So putting restraints on when it is suppose to NSA is bound to blow up on the person who is being posessive. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There's really no need to be confused about NSA.
NSA means 'no strings attached'.
This means they are not into tying you up and sticking a poker up your ass and suchlike.
It's not rocket science."
I totally agree with you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find one off meets work well for me
Everyone knows where they stand that way and its hard to get to know someone in one meet so not likely to fall for each other
Yeah its NSA sex but at the end of the day we are only human and even tho we may not be looking for someone if you meet someone regular and get on really well i think thats when people start getting feelings for each other
Of course im not saying everyone who meets regular falls in love, but your more likely to fall for someone you meet a lot rather than someone you only eet once
So i tend to just meet once then move on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In relation to swinging, I thing most men get clingy and arsey with women who have other meets, not necessarily because they have fallen in love and want to be with that woman, but because they want regular sex.
If the tables were turned and men were in demand and us ladies were struggling to get regular meets, then you'd find a lot less of the clingy and needy guys.
"
totally agree
I remember one guy i met a while back caling me up because i had been verified by another guy after i had met him, he called to ask why i had met this guys and said if i had wanted sex i should have just called him
I have no doubt at all that he had not fallen for me in anyway he just had this attitude that because we had met, got on and we did have great sex that every time i wanted a shag after i should just go back to him, we should become fuck buddies and i had no need to look for anyone else now, he couldnt get his head round the fact i didnt want to meet him again and i had moved onto soemone else |
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"I find one off meets work well for me
Everyone knows where they stand that way and its hard to get to know someone in one meet so not likely to fall for each other
Yeah its NSA sex but at the end of the day we are only human and even tho we may not be looking for someone if you meet someone regular and get on really well i think thats when people start getting feelings for each other
Of course im not saying everyone who meets regular falls in love, but your more likely to fall for someone you meet a lot rather than someone you only eet once
So i tend to just meet once then move on "
This tends to work for us too, men have got clingy too many times  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like to have a number of semi regular playmates. It's reliable, you know what each other likes and they're playing with other people too so there's rarely a problem. We're all different |
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"I find one off meets work well for me
Everyone knows where they stand that way and its hard to get to know someone in one meet so not likely to fall for each other
Yeah its NSA sex but at the end of the day we are only human and even tho we may not be looking for someone if you meet someone regular and get on really well i think thats when people start getting feelings for each other
Of course im not saying everyone who meets regular falls in love, but your more likely to fall for someone you meet a lot rather than someone you only eet once
So i tend to just meet once then move on "
we dont get to familiar with guys i feel it saves any misunderstanding so not more than twice do far it a choice, we're all human so avoids any chance of a bond, we dont do or look for the regular meet thing not our scene, suits us anyway x |
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