FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Whats all this 'owned' shite about?
Whats all this 'owned' shite about?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing? |
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Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site. |
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Not personally keen on it despite being in the lifestyle and I can't see the attraction as to me its just an extreme form of BDSM and is basically full time mind games.
But calling it stupid... each to their own but there are far worse 'kinks'
Feeder relationships, for example.
Each to their own of course, but what is that about |
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site."
 |
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing? "
Imagine Bob owns Jane. It means Jane won't want any decisions if you want to play with Jane. Bob will decide what Jane can and can't do. That's very different to Bob just being her partner. |
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site."
This.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site."
Perfectly put |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site.
Perfectly put "
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By *ucy LewdWoman
over a year ago
North Oxfordshire |
"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing? "
It's a Bdsm thing. It's clearly not your thing and there's no need to be rude about it. |
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing? "
I can’t excuse the ignorance in your header! I wonder what all this “curious” shites about. Wanting to “explore” .... really ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have absolutely no interest in BDSM, SM, Owned, spanking.....like I state in my profile. Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady. But...I certainly wouldn’t criticise others for liking or performing such acts. People are here to express their interests so fellow fabbers should either respect or ignore.
Op by commenting as you have I think is disrespectful to such people. If that’s their bag, you certainly don’t have to look into it. |
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By *haverMan
over a year ago
bracknell |
"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing?
Imagine Bob owns Jane. It means Jane won't want any decisions if you want to play with Jane. Bob will decide what Jane can and can't do. That's very different to Bob just being her partner."
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There are ladies who like to feel owned like a pet, to be treasured, and to be completely in their dominant partners hands. For many it's similar to a marriage when you give yourselves to each other but without the religious 'shite'. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are ladies who like to feel owned like a pet, to be treasured, and to be completely in their dominant partners hands. For many it's similar to a marriage when you give yourselves to each other but without the religious 'shite'."
Ladies??
Similar to marriage??
 |
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It means different things to different people I would think, depending on their situation and the agreement they have negotiated between them.
In some cases I'm sure you could also swap out 'owned' for a word like 'treasured' that puts a different slant on things doesn't it...
A D/s relationship can mean as much, if not more than a marriage and to mock people in such a relationship from a position of ignorance says much more about you than it does them. To be the first thing someone thinks of when they open their eyes and the last thing before they close them at night some see as a fair trade, others don't. It's an individual's choice and like all other individuals choices should be respected not judged or mocked.
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Its a power dynamic. Some people get off on controlling and caring for someone, others get off on trusting someone to have control and to care them. Its that simple.
You tend to find rich CEO types enjoy being owned because they have to be in control so much in their working life in their personal one they like to give the control over. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing?
Imagine Bob owns Jane. It means Jane won't want any decisions if you want to play with Jane. Bob will decide what Jane can and can't do. That's very different to Bob just being her partner."
Clear and concise explanation...it’s good for some..not for others..each to their own! Others sometimes call it “collared”. It’s certainly not uncommon. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have absolutely no interest in BDSM, SM, Owned, spanking.....like I state in my profile. Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady. But...I certainly wouldn’t criticise others for liking or performing such acts. People are here to express their interests so fellow fabbers should either respect or ignore.
Op by commenting as you have I think is disrespectful to such people. If that’s their bag, you certainly don’t have to look into it. "
To say it’s degrading sounds like a criticism.
Mrs
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Op....have you heard the saying "people in glass houses"? Some could ask "what's all this Fab straight about?" 
Oh yes the verification.... "
At least his name indicates he is “curious” |
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing? "
What a delightfully open minded and non judgmental question about a part of life you are curious about. I can just see how accepting you are going to be of any explanation of the different ways people enjoy their lives. |
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing?
Imagine Bob owns Jane. It means Jane won't want any decisions if you want to play with Jane. Bob will decide what Jane can and can't do. That's very different to Bob just being her partner."
Unless of course Bob and Jane previously agreed that when they play Jane makes all her own choices because Bob's primary driver is to ensure Jane is not only safe but also happy. He understands exactly what makes Jane tick therefore he of course agrees with her wishes in this instance because he sees no down side for either of them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have absolutely no interest in BDSM, SM, Owned, spanking.....like I state in my profile. Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady. But...I certainly wouldn’t criticise others for liking or performing such acts. People are here to express their interests so fellow fabbers should either respect or ignore.
Op by commenting as you have I think is disrespectful to such people. If that’s their bag, you certainly don’t have to look into it.
To say it’s degrading sounds like a criticism.
Mrs
"
Just my personal opinion, like I said in the next line, I wouldn’t criticise. I just have a different outlook on sex and the respect for ladies. If that is what people like, so be it. Apologies if I come across with my statement.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have absolutely no interest in BDSM, SM, Owned, spanking.....like I state in my profile. Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady. But...I certainly wouldn’t criticise others for liking or performing such acts. People are here to express their interests so fellow fabbers should either respect or ignore.
Op by commenting as you have I think is disrespectful to such people. If that’s their bag, you certainly don’t have to look into it.
To say it’s degrading sounds like a criticism.
Mrs
Just my personal opinion, like I said in the next line, I wouldn’t criticise. I just have a different outlook on sex and the respect for ladies. If that is what people like, so be it. Apologies if I come across with my statement. "
‘Wrong’ with my statement. |
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"Its a power dynamic. Some people get off on controlling and caring for someone, others get off on trusting someone to have control and to care them. Its that simple.
You tend to find rich CEO types enjoy being owned because they have to be in control so much in their working life in their personal one they like to give the control over."
Almost all my playmates are "high fliers". In charge on a daily basis but like to relinquish control in the bedroom.
Find it amusing when people assume subs are big girls...they have nooooo idea! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have absolutely no interest in BDSM, SM, Owned, spanking.....like I state in my profile. Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady. But...I certainly wouldn’t criticise others for liking or performing such acts. People are here to express their interests so fellow fabbers should either respect or ignore.
Op by commenting as you have I think is disrespectful to such people. If that’s their bag, you certainly don’t have to look into it.
To say it’s degrading sounds like a criticism.
Mrs
Just my personal opinion, like I said in the next line, I wouldn’t criticise. I just have a different outlook on sex and the respect for ladies. If that is what people like, so be it. Apologies if I come across with my statement. "
I think it’s a misunderstanding that the D/s dynamics is degrading or disrespectful. It can be, but not if done properly. If anything it is the ultimate in trust.
Mrs |
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By *ucy LewdWoman
over a year ago
North Oxfordshire |
"I have absolutely no interest in BDSM, SM, Owned, spanking.....like I state in my profile. Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady. "
Is it degrading to the 'lady' if she's in charge and owns the man? |
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site."
Exactly. How anyone on a swinging site can be so dismissive of the safe, sane and consensual kinks of others baffles me
I've owned a few subs. They get too needy and wanty so now incredibly picky |
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing?
Imagine Bob owns Jane. It means Jane won't want any decisions if you want to play with Jane. Bob will decide what Jane can and can't do. That's very different to Bob just being her partner.
Unless of course Bob and Jane previously agreed that when they play Jane makes all her own choices because Bob's primary driver is to ensure Jane is not only safe but also happy. He understands exactly what makes Jane tick therefore he of course agrees with her wishes in this instance because he sees no down side for either of them."
Yes this is why it's hard to find a good dom because most men don't understand this aspect. They think being a dom is selfish when actually a good one is the opposite, unless you are just very lucky and the subs desires exactly match the selfish tendencies of the dom (unlikely) |
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"Its a power dynamic. Some people get off on controlling and caring for someone, others get off on trusting someone to have control and to care them. Its that simple.
You tend to find rich CEO types enjoy being owned because they have to be in control so much in their working life in their personal one they like to give the control over.
Almost all my playmates are "high fliers". In charge on a daily basis but like to relinquish control in the bedroom.
Find it amusing when people assume subs are big girls...they have nooooo idea! "
This is also true |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site."
Well said |
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"I have absolutely no interest in BDSM, SM, Owned, spanking.....like I state in my profile. Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady. But...I certainly wouldn’t criticise others for liking or performing such acts. People are here to express their interests so fellow fabbers should either respect or ignore.
Op by commenting as you have I think is disrespectful to such people. If that’s their bag, you certainly don’t have to look into it.
To say it’s degrading sounds like a criticism.
Mrs
Just my personal opinion, like I said in the next line, I wouldn’t criticise. I just have a different outlook on sex and the respect for ladies. If that is what people like, so be it. Apologies if I come across with my statement.
I think it’s a misunderstanding that the D/s dynamics is degrading or disrespectful. It can be, but not if done properly. If anything it is the ultimate in trust.
Mrs"
When done right it’s such a beautiful thing to have between two people. I miss it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Too many people looking for quickies and are not genuine swingers on here. No genuine swingers would word a curiosity iin manner. I hope none of the bdsm's are offended happy swinging all x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing? "
it's just a label if you're into it you're into it ,many women love to be told / ordered to do things sex related its kind of related to BDSM ,Master and slave sort of thing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site."
This |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have absolutely no interest in BDSM, SM, Owned, spanking.....like I state in my profile. Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady. But...I certainly wouldn’t criticise others for liking or performing such acts. People are here to express their interests so fellow fabbers should either respect or ignore.
Op by commenting as you have I think is disrespectful to such people. If that’s their bag, you certainly don’t have to look into it. "
From a sub's point of view i never feel degraded!! We discussed our boundaries and we bith have ultimate trust and respect for each other.  |
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"It means different things to different people I would think, depending on their situation and the agreement they have negotiated between them.
In some cases I'm sure you could also swap out 'owned' for a word like 'treasured' that puts a different slant on things doesn't it...
A D/s relationship can mean as much, if not more than a marriage and to mock people in such a relationship from a position of ignorance says much more about you than it does them. To be the first thing someone thinks of when they open their eyes and the last thing before they close them at night some see as a fair trade, others don't. It's an individual's choice and like all other individuals choices should be respected not judged or mocked.
"
Thank you for explaining it. I am indeed treasured |
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing?
Imagine Bob owns Jane. It means Jane won't want any decisions if you want to play with Jane. Bob will decide what Jane can and can't do. That's very different to Bob just being her partner.
Unless of course Bob and Jane previously agreed that when they play Jane makes all her own choices because Bob's primary driver is to ensure Jane is not only safe but also happy. He understands exactly what makes Jane tick therefore he of course agrees with her wishes in this instance because he sees no down side for either of them."
Thank you again. This describes my sorry owned little ass  |
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" Find it amusing when people assume subs are big girls...they have nooooo idea! "
Well said!
I've got a new "relationship" going via here and its certainly not me thats the sub! lol
I own his sweet arse and thats the way he likes it 
Its all about him doing anything he can to make me happy.
Bit rude OP |
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"No not for me ....no man degrades me ....end of . 
And you think I am degraded ?
You couldn’t be more wrong. "
In reality a good dom is trying to figure out what the sub wants but won't ask for. This nuance is lost on people that think it's degrading. |
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"No not for me ....no man degrades me ....end of .
And you think I am degraded ?
You couldn’t be more wrong.
In reality a good dom is trying to figure out what the sub wants but won't ask for. This nuance is lost on people that think it's degrading."
Thank you.
Every sub / dom will have their own rules etc. But in our relationship nothing happens without both of us agreeing. During play if I’ve had enough I have a safe word. Never had to use it. And when we meet sub guys we discuss beforehand exactly what they want. This is what people seem to miss. The sub in actual fact is deciding what they want for themselves.
So these words flying around like insulting, degrading just don’t mean a thing in our relationship. It’s a very uneducated view of who we are. I am treated like a princess by FT. He’s currently downstairs making mr breakfast. What a total bastard eh.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No not for me ....no man degrades me ....end of . "
Why the assumption it’s degrading...? Some just don’t understand that the whole D/S thing is ultimately consensual. It is as much about giving control as taking it....! |
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"No not for me ....no man degrades me ....end of .
Why the assumption it’s degrading...? Some just don’t understand that the whole D/S thing is ultimately consensual. It is as much about giving control as taking it....!"
Exactly. I am so independent and in control of other aspects of my life that I like to surrender some control to FT. I choose to, yes me the sub chooses. I have a very demanding job which puts me in situations where I am often controlling meetings mostly with men. I enjoy that but in my private life I want to feel feminine and this is a route to getting that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing? "
its like marmite you either get it or you don't |
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"There are ladies who like to feel owned like a pet, to be treasured, and to be completely in their dominant partners hands. For many it's similar to a marriage when you give yourselves to each other but without the religious 'shite'."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things "
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site.
Perfectly put "
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks"
Thank you for explaining my relationship to me. How ignorant of you. |
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks"
We're all on a swinging site where one would hope for acceptance and open mindedness. The majority of the population don't understand swinging. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks"
So, three minutes of missionary position, with the lights off, for you then?
Perhaps you are on the wrong site? |
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks
We're all on a swinging site where one would hope for acceptance and open mindedness. The majority of the population don't understand swinging."
I really don’t appreciate my loving caring partner being likened to a twat.
Thank to to everyone who has shown support, whether they like, understand or dislike the BDSM scene.
It’s entirely possible to have an opinion without being abusive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks
So, three minutes of missionary position, with the lights off, for you then?
Perhaps you are on the wrong site?"
Haha, 3 minutes lol. Thats a good one hun xx. I guess my opinion i have on ownership deserved that sort of response.
Happy Christmas to one and all.
Pete xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site.
Perfectly put
"
Yep |
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks
We're all on a swinging site where one would hope for acceptance and open mindedness. The majority of the population don't understand swinging.
I really don’t appreciate my loving caring partner being likened to a twat.
Thank to to everyone who has shown support, whether they like, understand or dislike the BDSM scene.
It’s entirely possible to have an opinion without being abusive. "
I agree it is possible.
I don't think that they were referring to your partner specifically, just expressing a widely held misconception |
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site."
|
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks
We're all on a swinging site where one would hope for acceptance and open mindedness. The majority of the population don't understand swinging.
I really don’t appreciate my loving caring partner being likened to a twat.
Thank to to everyone who has shown support, whether they like, understand or dislike the BDSM scene.
It’s entirely possible to have an opinion without being abusive.
I agree it is possible.
I don't think that they were referring to your partner specifically, just expressing a widely held misconception "
I get that but those comments are very personal. It’s a comment that all owners / Dom’s are twats. Like the general comments that all subs / owned people are silly, stupid, pathetic.
We’ve had a few threads on this subject recently and the outpouring of loathing is quite astonishing....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm intrigued by people who are in this kind of relationship but it's not something I think I would enjoy.
Each to their own hey? "
It is the most amazing relationship... xx |
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks
We're all on a swinging site where one would hope for acceptance and open mindedness. The majority of the population don't understand swinging.
I really don’t appreciate my loving caring partner being likened to a twat.
Thank to to everyone who has shown support, whether they like, understand or dislike the BDSM scene.
It’s entirely possible to have an opinion without being abusive.
I agree it is possible.
I don't think that they were referring to your partner specifically, just expressing a widely held misconception
I get that but those comments are very personal. It’s a comment that all owners / Dom’s are twats. Like the general comments that all subs / owned people are silly, stupid, pathetic.
We’ve had a few threads on this subject recently and the outpouring of loathing is quite astonishing....
"
There are one or two subjects that incite this sort of response. It used to be pubic hair and kissing, to an extent still is.
My personal opinion is that it's best to educate and ignore .
Happy Christmas |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks
We're all on a swinging site where one would hope for acceptance and open mindedness. The majority of the population don't understand swinging.
I really don’t appreciate my loving caring partner being likened to a twat.
Thank to to everyone who has shown support, whether they like, understand or dislike the BDSM scene.
It’s entirely possible to have an opinion without being abusive.
I agree it is possible.
I don't think that they were referring to your partner specifically, just expressing a widely held misconception
I get that but those comments are very personal. It’s a comment that all owners / Dom’s are twats. Like the general comments that all subs / owned people are silly, stupid, pathetic.
We’ve had a few threads on this subject recently and the outpouring of loathing is quite astonishing....
"
Do you think people get confused with the whole consensual part of it. Not many understand it is the sub requesting/allowing it and assume it's more of an abusive control type of thing, hence their disgust.
Not many bother to actually look a little deeper I think.
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"I'm intrigued by people who are in this kind of relationship but it's not something I think I would enjoy.
Each to their own hey?
It is the most amazing relationship... xx"
Indeed. It’s very liberating even if it doesn’t look it, just stunning when it’s the right dynamic |
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site."
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"I'm intrigued by people who are in this kind of relationship but it's not something I think I would enjoy.
Each to their own hey?
It is the most amazing relationship... xx
Indeed. It’s very liberating even if it doesn’t look it, just stunning when it’s the right dynamic "
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site."
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks
We're all on a swinging site where one would hope for acceptance and open mindedness. The majority of the population don't understand swinging."
I think the OP thinks this is just an instant shag site anyway....and quite clearly doesn't understand swinging himself.... |
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"I have absolutely no interest in BDSM, SM, Owned, spanking.....like I state in my profile. Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady. But...I certainly wouldn’t criticise others for liking or performing such acts. People are here to express their interests so fellow fabbers should either respect or ignore.
Op by commenting as you have I think is disrespectful to such people. If that’s their bag, you certainly don’t have to look into it.
To say it’s degrading sounds like a criticism.
Mrs
Just my personal opinion, like I said in the next line, I wouldn’t criticise. I just have a different outlook on sex and the respect for ladies. If that is what people like, so be it. Apologies if I come across with my statement. "
ok so we get that you have respect for ladies. How does that sit with tour assumption that only females can be owned? |
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks"
complexity not your thing then? |
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks
We're all on a swinging site where one would hope for acceptance and open mindedness. The majority of the population don't understand swinging.
I really don’t appreciate my loving caring partner being likened to a twat.
Thank to to everyone who has shown support, whether they like, understand or dislike the BDSM scene.
It’s entirely possible to have an opinion without being abusive.
I agree it is possible.
I don't think that they were referring to your partner specifically, just expressing a widely held misconception
I get that but those comments are very personal. It’s a comment that all owners / Dom’s are twats. Like the general comments that all subs / owned people are silly, stupid, pathetic.
We’ve had a few threads on this subject recently and the outpouring of loathing is quite astonishing....
Do you think people get confused with the whole consensual part of it. Not many understand it is the sub requesting/allowing it and assume it's more of an abusive control type of thing, hence their disgust.
Not many bother to actually look a little deeper I think.
"
I think its assumption and ignorance in many cases for sure. The bit that intrigues me is how many judge based on their own failings |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Wow! Opened a can of worms here. I apologise for the 'shite' word, i was a bit frustrated and in need of a rant/information.
Thanks for clearing it up! Each to their own x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No not for me ....no man degrades me ....end of .
And you think I am degraded ?
You couldn’t be more wrong.
In reality a good dom is trying to figure out what the sub wants but won't ask for. This nuance is lost on people that think it's degrading."
I think confusion is arising over humiliation. This is a kink and can be a consensual part of a D/s relationship. If not consensual, as others have said, it's abuse. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's one of these stupid fetish things
Exactly .
Cant do this, cant do that, need to ask permission from the twat that apparently owns me. Fuck that shit. What a load of bollocks"
Bless. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It doesn't take a genius to figure out that my earlier comment didnt go down too well .
In answer to a lot of what has been written since, No i dont understand and probably will never understand the owned, sub thingy. Its not something that appeals to me even though people in the past have tried explaining it in great length to me. I guess you are in it or not.
Wrong for me to have been so blatant and my word selection was also a tad bit harsh. Im like a bull in a china shop, open my mouth and say things and get battered and bombarded with aftermath comments.
I deserve what comes my way but im not sensitive to the point that i get upset by what other peoples opinions are.
Each to thier own as we are all different. What does it for you doesn't necessarily do it for me.
Apologies to those who took what i said to heart.
Pete xx
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing? "
Each to there own mate...if you dont like then move on n get over it. You as a swinger....a non swinger Will say the same ....whats all thar about.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think someone not understanding the appeal of BDSM is similar to someone like me not understanding the appeal of football, or car racing, or numerous other things that some people love and I have no interest in. I don’t think it really is possible to understand why some people like BDSM any more so than I will ever understand why some people like football. But I don’t say football is stupid, or make uneducated generalisations and assumptions about a sport I know little about, just because it doesn’t interest me.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whats this owned business about. Excuse my ignorance but doesnt that just mean your with someone? A fellow swinger? Or is it more of submissive thing? "
Excuse my ignorance, but why does your profile say straight, when your verifications disagree with that? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm intrigued by people who are in this kind of relationship but it's not something I think I would enjoy.
Each to their own hey?
It is the most amazing relationship... xx
Indeed. It’s very liberating even if it doesn’t look it, just stunning when it’s the right dynamic "
We have a fantastic dynamic!! Built on trust and respect |
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"Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady
"
if its degrading, im curious to know when you have a hand full of hair in one hand and your other hand between their legs, whispering 'this is mine now'softly in their ear... why do they melt in to a quivering, soggy mess with a burning desire to follow your every command and desire...is it cos i asked so nicely?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Other people's fetishes and preferences aren't shite or stupid. It's a BDSM thing, if you don't understand it or want to take part in it that's fine but don't diss it. It's nice to be open minded on a swingers site."
Well said!
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"Personally I think it’s degrading to the lady
if its degrading, im curious to know when you have a hand full of hair in one hand and your other hand between their legs, whispering 'this is mine now'softly in their ear... why do they melt in to a quivering, soggy mess with a burning desire to follow your every command and desire...is it cos i asked so nicely? "
Yummy x |
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