FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Does it pay to be a gentleman?
Does it pay to be a gentleman?
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By *xbanana2 OP Man
over a year ago
addlestone |
To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating  |
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OP most ladies prefer to be treated with respect so don't stop being a gentleman.
Perhaps the issue lies elsewhere. Most ladies and couples will read your profile before they read your message.
I can't offer profile advice as it against the rules if you haven't specifically asked for it. I would suggest you do a forum search for profile advice and pick out the good bits. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating "
to be treated with respect and manners.
i expect this no matter what and where i meet people |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Women and couples will appreciate you being a gentleman and it's a very nice quality to have. A guy who is pushy and assuming with no manners would not be entertained by most people, so be yourself! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hi Sexy peeps
I have always been polite and respectful when ever I meet.
I think my meets have always appreciated that I always conduct myself as a gentleman should.
After all we are on this site for the same and manners and mutual respect cost nothing. |
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It pays to have respect for everyone, whatever your gender. You will likely get more people who want a partner who is respectful, rather than the opposite.
It's your call though - but you could be thrown out of most places if you are not respectful and definitely if you break rules. |
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating "
Just carry on doing what your doing weather it pays or not because its the right thing to do. |
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By *xbanana2 OP Man
over a year ago
addlestone |
"It's always lovely to find a gentleman on fab. I have been lucky enough to have a few of them message me and it's lovely to chat with them "
it would be a pleasure to chat with you.....nice pics btw
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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago
Wherever the party is! |
"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating "
I could be verifiably classed as a gentleman. I also like to treat a woman as if I just got parole after three years in prison!
How do you find women respond to you when you talk to them in clubs? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You have to be yourself. I like politeness and courtesy. Both ways! I can try to ensure that I provide it from my side. The other way... actually it is pretty good, when you get a response.
If I had dozens of messages a day, from women demanding my knob, I suspect that I might not respond too promptly either.
PS Ladies, if you like you can try it and see if I can cope.  |
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By *not69Man
over a year ago
PDI until the 18th Nov |
"OP most ladies prefer to be treated with respect so don't stop being a gentleman.
Perhaps the issue lies elsewhere. Most ladies and couples will read your profile before they read your message.
I can't offer profile advice as it against the rules if you haven't specifically asked for it. I would suggest you do a forum search for profile advice and pick out the good bits."
He doesn't need to specifically ask for profile advice, you can offer profile advice if it is relevent to the thread. |
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By *xbanana2 OP Man
over a year ago
addlestone |
"Do you wish to appeal to ladies who like a gentleman or those who don't? Which is the lady you'd prefer to spend time with? "
obviously i wish to appeal to someone im curteous to , hopefully leading to spending time with her...but that also means im nice to those who i dont want to be with.i like all women if im honest.
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"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating
I could be verifiably classed as a gentleman. I also like to treat a woman as if I just got parole after three years in prison!
How do you find women respond to you when you talk to them in clubs? "
 I like versatility  |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
I would say it is best to be gentlemen to start with, if that is what you are.
If the lady wants you to be different and you are comfortable changing/role playing then that can come later. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Of course you need to be polite. Politeness should go without saying. BUT it is NOT politeness in itself that gets people into bed. Sex appeal is what is required for that.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hey mate,
This question always comes up in forums.
What I've learnt is:
1. If they delete message, I always wait for a while and message again and se3 if they reply to the next one. If they come back with sorry been getting loads of messages how are you then. Then they have made the effort to at least engage with you. If they delete message or block you, they aren't your cup of tea. Move on to the next.
2. Attend a social - look out for socials in your area. They are a brilliant way of engaging with people face to face and people can see you for you are which would be polite and genuine.
3. You have to appreciate that the ratio of men every one woman is 10837837836261 to 1 lol. The would you are trying to get to know is getting bombarded with all sorts of messages. If she feels you are genuine then she will get back to you.
4. Keep being you and don't every change.
5. Don't give up  |
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By *xbanana2 OP Man
over a year ago
addlestone |
"Hey mate,
This question always comes up in forums.
What I've learnt is:
1. If they delete message, I always wait for a while and message again and se3 if they reply to the next one. If they come back with sorry been getting loads of messages how are you then. Then they have made the effort to at least engage with you. If they delete message or block you, they aren't your cup of tea. Move on to the next.
2. Attend a social - look out for socials in your area. They are a brilliant way of engaging with people face to face and people can see you for you are which would be polite and genuine.
3. You have to appreciate that the ratio of men every one woman is 10837837836261 to 1 lol. The would you are trying to get to know is getting bombarded with all sorts of messages. If she feels you are genuine then she will get back to you.
4. Keep being you and don't every change.
5. Don't give up "
thanks...i wont |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating "
Do you mean in the presence of ladies or in communicating on here? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating "
The site is very frustrating OP and you are definitely not alone. Stay true to yourself, polite and respectful. Thats the only way i know.
The frustration simply builds because you never get a reply or attention from the women or couples you like.
Keep plodding away and approach things with a pinch of salt. Never expect anything and you wont be disappointed. Thats my approach.
Despite what ive said, it doesn't make the frustration any easier.
There is no magic wand op. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Why change who you are just on the off chance you might laid OP? Not only would that be disingenuous, it would likely be rejected anyway.
Carry on being you, being polite, respectful and courteous, it may not make any difference when it comes to meets, but at least you'll be being true to yourself 
As this thread has shown that you don't need to change how you act - perhaps look at what else might be the problem (hint: there are some very good suggestions further up thread) |
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Always be a gent would be my advice...its the right thing to do and most ladies appreciate it..its all about mutual respect and pleasure. There are exceptions of course, but their profiles amd chat beforehand should clarify that..good luck |
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By *xbanana2 OP Man
over a year ago
addlestone |
"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating
Do you mean in the presence of ladies or in communicating on here?"
in the presence of ladìes x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In this day and age, gentlemen are a dying breed.
Don't change OP, some of us still like to be treated like ladies "
I find it also pays to be a gent. It's comes naturally anyway so couldn't be anything else. |
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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago
Wherever the party is! |
"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating
I could be verifiably classed as a gentleman. I also like to treat a woman as if I just got parole after three years in prison!
How do you find women respond to you when you talk to them in clubs?
I like versatility "
Then you shall have it!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating "
Keep being a Gent... I find manners and politeness such a turn on. |
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As has been mentioned. It's the ratio of men to women and couples that goes against single guys. So speaking as a couple. When single guys contact us. If what they say makes it plain that they haven't read our profile, its very short, one worded or rude etc etc it gets deleted.
If thought is put into it (no essay needed), they will at least get a reply even if not immediately.
Back when I was single I would often get praised by single ladies and couples. Not because I said or did anything particularly special. But simple because so many other guys used the counter productive approaches mentioned above. Sometimes they would say with an air of relief OMG you sound normal and not like an ****hole lol.
So in summary I would say that being polite gives you an advantage and is at worst neutral. Not being polite and respectful? Well I'd say chances of success reduce from 1 in 500 to 1 in 500,000.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP most ladies prefer to be treated with respect so don't stop being a gentleman.
Perhaps the issue lies elsewhere. Most ladies and couples will read your profile before they read your message.
I can't offer profile advice as it against the rules if you haven't specifically asked for it. I would suggest you do a forum search for profile advice and pick out the good bits."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating "
Always best to be a gent. There are a lot of great guys on here |
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"Thanks for that , im sure someone will appreciate it...perhaps im not pushy enough "
No...you are messaging the wrong women in my opinion....there are quite obviously different class levels on here...if you message someone who is not on your level, then you can actually scare women off....I don’t get that many messages from men, as quite clearly my profile gives the impression that I am a stuck up spoilt brat....which I am ....ha ha  |
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I will always recommend be respectful but I know what you are talking about and if the ladies throw insults at your door , you have to step up and cut them off , you see ladies think they are all the same but thats not true , I have met some ladies with very bad attitudes , I just end the conversation and walk past them as if they were never there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like to consider myself a gent, cheeky with it but still a gent. If that's what's in your nature stick to it and the right meets will come along. Being something other then yourself will most likely lead to stuff/meets that don't suit you.
Good luck OP |
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"I like to consider myself a gent, cheeky with it but still a gent. If that's what's in your nature stick to it and the right meets will come along. Being something other then yourself will most likely lead to stuff/meets that don't suit you.
Good luck OP "
Exactly x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for that , im sure someone will appreciate it...perhaps im not pushy enough "
There's a fine line between being polite and pushy, and this is different online and in person, e.g. in a club. You need sufficient persistence (leavened with charm) to make the woman feel desired without being a nuisance. Practice makes perfect! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating
Do you mean in the presence of ladies or in communicating on here?in the presence of ladìes x"
Then continue. It's a good attitude. |
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"To be a gent or not?
I have always tried to be polite and well mannered with the ladies ive met on here...to no avail. Has anyone else experienced this , or is it just me. I find it very frustrating "
I was discussing this very subject with my valet this morning.  |
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