FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Do you like to be watched?
Do you like to be watched?
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So as a couple fairly naive to swinging, two parties in and still swinging virgins, we are still learning the etiquette.
The first party we attended stated all doors to be left open during play. We were tempted to watch others, but as it was our first time we didn't - we didn't want to impose or ask whilst they were in the moment. We tried to play, but felt as we didn't really enjoy being on display, we stopped and carried on later back at home.
The next party we attended didn't state that doors couldn't be closed - so we went to play on a swing - and closed the door so it was ajar by about an inch. We wanted private time, but did not want to break any rules either.
It didn't take very long at all until a single guy came in to watch. We both felt uncomfortable but did not know how each other felt because we were trying to be in the moment. It came to a head when the guy tried to join in (without asking) and I had to say no. We then closed the door.
Discussing it afterwards as couple, we both realise that we felt the pressure of performance. Whilst we may be ready for a full swap with another couple, being watched by someone not involved felt a bit uncomfortable. We probably won't always feel like that - but we are noobs right now.
To break down that barrier, as a couple, at the next party we think we would like to watch someone else. We don't know how we will go about it, but we shall see.
So my question is really to others that have done this. At parties, do you like or mind to be watched? What is the etiquette? Should we ask, or just watch quietly? What is your experience? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don’t care who watches , and we happily watch others , especially at a party .
No one should just try and join in without asking first .
"
this.. to be fair people that don't want to be watched will either not go to parties or close the doors.
If a door is open is safe to assume they won't mind being watched but watch quietly.. while it doesn't always put us off we have seen the moment ruined by some loud spectators. Unless it's just us in a room together... I Cali prefer to be watched.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We don't do parties or clubs but we're quite happy to invite a guy round to watch.
We've had 3somes where the guy has finished and we carry-on with them watching and it's a serious turn on.
Now we want to switch it so we have guy watch us and then possibly join in if we decide. |
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"We don’t care who watches , and we happily watch others , especially at a party .
No one should just try and join in without asking first .
"
I think as we are new it's a confidence thing, which we'll get over soon enough. It was a bit strange the way the guy tried to join in. I couldn't see much, but I knew someone was in the room. Apparently he stroked my partner's leg, and then her arm and she didn't say no at that point as she should have done really, because she was a bit nervous. I only realised what was happening when he started licking her nipple between my fingers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No interested in being watched; I don’t treat sex as a performance for people that are not involved in the fun.
However, I am a keen voyeur, however contradictory that might sound. |
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Tbh sounds like you're not ready for parties and may never be if you're uncomfortable doing the watching too.
That's ok each to their own.
I love being watched and discovered that at my first party despite swearing blind I was only curious  |
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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago
Catthorpe |
"I like being watched.
If I’m in an open room, then I’d expect to be watched but I wouldn’t expect anyone to touch me without my permission."
Our exact expectations. The guy in our opinion trying to join in was out of order for not asking. When he entered I (he) would have looked at him and told him very clearly, this is a watch only scenario.
Welcome to the swing world. Put it down to teething problems and not let it worry you, everyone goes through early issues. Good luck, guys.   |
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"Tbh sounds like you're not ready for parties and may never be if you're uncomfortable doing the watching too.
That's ok each to their own.
I love being watched and discovered that at my first party despite swearing blind I was only curious "
Maybe. How do you get ready for parties other than going and finding out?
We wouldn't feel uncomfortable watching others - we just don't want to make them feel uncomfortable by us watching. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I as a single male i love to be watched and watch outhers. But i do get the right hump if someone tryes to join in without asking. In any meet there must be atraction. Sorry smokers but i wont alow any play if they just been smoking. Politness is a must |
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We love being watched. He gets a kick out of men standing round wanking whilst watching her fuck him. We are happy for anybody to watch but if you touch without permission you’ll get your fingers broken ?? |
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The first thing you should know is that nobody ever has the right to touch you without consent. The second is that you should always say no, loudly and clearly if someone is doing something you don't want them to. Never endure anything out of politeness.
It's ok if you never enjoy being watched. I thought I'd love it...turns out I hated it .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I enjoy being watched and watching others. But I will not allow anyone to join in without asking first. Most guys will ask but you will get the odd few that think it's their right to touch.
Before going to a club check out the forum, find out the do's and dont's. Also read verifications for the club too. It will give you a feel for the place as other people's views and opinions could help decide whether a particular club is for you or not
Good luck |
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By *wo4FemCouple
over a year ago
Birmingham |
We have been watched and have watched in the past and found it enjoyable.
We don't do parties or clubs as we prefer to meet socially in a pub with the other person. Maybe you should try that next time.
Out of curiosity you say we, yet you have a single profile and not a couples. Why is that?
Mr2
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have been watched and have watched in the past and found it enjoyable.
We don't do parties or clubs as we prefer to meet socially in a pub with the other person. Maybe you should try that next time.
Out of curiosity you say we, yet you have a single profile and not a couples. Why is that?
Mr2
"
well spotted |
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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago
Best Greggs in Cheshire East |
I'm a tart. I like showing off. I would have no issue being watched whilst doing my thing. I would enjoy watching others. I wouldn't crack one off whilst doing so unless I was asked too. |
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"Out of curiosity you say we, yet you have a single profile and not a couples. Why is that?"
Because we have an open relationship, and this is my profile - at the point in time that I set it up, she didn't want to be online, hence no couples profile.
We do have a couples profile elsewhere now, and we are going to set one up here at some point. |
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By *oresexMan
over a year ago
South West coast |
If the door is open at a party, slip in and watch, it's what they like, otherwise the door would be shut, as another couple in the room touch each other and enjoy the moment, but always always ask politely before attempting to touch them, it's nice for them to see they are turning others on with their performance, if they are not comfortable they could ask you to go. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I love being watched and always have from the beginning. There is other things that I'm not in my preferences and that's ok. My perception of what swinging is hasn't changed from when we first started doing this but there is things that I will do now that I didn't before and visa versa. I won't as an adult just put up with things just to accommodate someone else. Play it by ear and you'll find out what you are wanting from this as it can change with every experience and as long as you and your partner is happy fuck everyone else x |
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By *uicy72Woman
over a year ago
North Colchester |
Most parties I’ve been to doors have to stay open !
There’s usually a sign on the door
People watch but don’t touch at all
Unless asked 
I’m happy to watch
Or be watched  
Never used to but the more parties I go to the more confident I get
No one judges |
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