FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Thoughts on taking time for a social meeting !
Thoughts on taking time for a social meeting !
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I will never understand why some men don't want to or can't be bothered to meet for a social before they expect me to hop into there bad .... they are often the ones who moan when they see I have another verification and I haven't met them! But even after explaining why they don't seem to do anything different! Wondered what other peoples thoughts on this are ... Do you think men who meet for socials first get more luck? Or do you not meet for socials and get the meets you want? If you don't like meeting for socials why is that? Ooh so many questions  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I will never understand why some men don't want to or can't be bothered to meet for a social before they expect me to hop into there bad .... they are often the ones who moan when they see I have another verification and I haven't met them! But even after explaining why they don't seem to do anything different! Wondered what other peoples thoughts on this are ... Do you think men who meet for socials first get more luck? Or do you not meet for socials and get the meets you want? If you don't like meeting for socials why is that? Ooh so many questions "
Personally I WANT a social I want to flirting and laughing and barrier breaking to make the whole thing even better |
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"I will never understand why some men don't want to or can't be bothered to meet for a social before they expect me to hop into there bad .... they are often the ones who moan when they see I have another verification and I haven't met them! But even after explaining why they don't seem to do anything different! Wondered what other peoples thoughts on this are ... Do you think men who meet for socials first get more luck? Or do you not meet for socials and get the meets you want? If you don't like meeting for socials why is that? Ooh so many questions
Personally I WANT a social I want to flirting and laughing and barrier breaking to make the whole thing even better"
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
I do like a social, it's a good chance for a bit of flirting and getting to know a person. But I've had quite a few successful encounters where we pretty much got straight down to it. I think it maybe depends how long you've been talking to the person |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We like to meet socially first and make sure in real life they are who and what they say they are. It's much easier sat at a keyboard to be things you aren't. It's part to confirm there's the necessary attraction and part a safety thing, wouldn't want to meet someone I don't know in private straight out of the gate.
I also wonder how many who are keen to get to the bedroom are attached and don't want to have explaining to do if they're seen out with you. |
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"I do like a social, it's a good chance for a bit of flirting and getting to know a person. But I've had quite a few successful encounters where we pretty much got straight down to it. I think it maybe depends how long you've been talking to the person"
Ohh don't get me wrong I have had socials that lasted half hour before we were ripping off each others clothes in private! But I like no pressure! The opportunity to change my mind if need be! |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I'd always prefer an element of socialising first to be sure I like the person I'm meeting and they me - now that may be a separate event or a meet at a club (if I'm pretty sure things are going to progress) where time can be spent in the social area first and then if all are happy to "take things further" the option is there, and if they're not there's still the club to enjoy anyway.
Either way I couldn't just turn up to meet someone I'd never met in person before and just get down to it - just wouldn't make for a very pleasant experience to my mind - too clinical and business like for one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Back in the days when I was meeting chaps (A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away); the social refusal was an excellent filter for me as it showed that my needs and wishes would never be met by them and equally their needs and wishes would never be met by me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think that some people like to meet for socials and some don't. Nobody is right or wrong."
All back to that personal preference again.
I'm a strictly social first, if I can't enjoy myself socially with someone there's little chance of us being compatible physically.
Always a daytime social as well to try and avoid the temptation to blur the lines between social and play. |
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"I think that some people like to meet for socials and some don't. Nobody is right or wrong.
All back to that personal preference again.
I'm a strictly social first, if I can't enjoy myself socially with someone there's little chance of us being compatible physically.
Always a daytime social as well to try and avoid the temptation to blur the lines between social and play."
We always insist on a social too, usually in the evening at a neutral location. We have no problem with people who don't want socials it just means we're not compatible.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have had quite a few social meets and have found that the ones where we played first time round to be less rewarding than those that started with a social we think it helps break the ice and the sex is usually better  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like a social first just been speaking to some guy on here for like 2 hours and the topic came up about a social meet he went quiet for a bit then messaged and said we can't end up in mine I have a partner but we don't sleep together wtf like then he said he was joking.. realy ..for 1 I was not planning on jumping in is bed with him and 2 hes now blocked so yes I agree social meets r always best way sorry about the rant lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't do social meets. I have no need to and very little time to. My meets are far from cold and clinical and not at all business like, as all the groundwork has already been done before i even decide i want to meet. I don't meet local guys so there is an element of "who wants to travel for over an hour for a coffee?".
I don't see any way of meeting as right or wrong just people that I'm not compatible with. I don't enter into dialogue with those that insist on a social. I just accept that we do things differently and move on. I don't understand why it becomes a big deal for some. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Had some great socials, also had some shite socials. The meets tended to reflect the socials, and that's what I'm lead by so it's social first all the way (except for one...) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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While I have met without a social, the vast majority have all been with a social first. Once a social with a view to play, if all agree. And we did.
I tend to expect a social first. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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personally I don't meet for social unless I know n have met them before or have chatted on video or on the phone its awkward to meet someone u dont know cafe then nothing to talk about what u going to talk about sex or what u know u not looking for relationship or anything if I want nsa why bother planning days for social meet endless chat
foroom me the social before meeting is pointless
I rather meet some one first if they like me stay freinds n fuck when ever you want n go for a drink n stuff |
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I dont do socials. If i meet its for sex. I always chat for ages first on here so by the time i meet them i feel as if we know each other well enough. I know exactly what i am looking for and have never been disappointed with who i have met |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
A meet for a social is essential to see if mutual chemistry is established and the spark is there, particularly if you haven't spoken much to the person before.
That being said, if you've chatted plenty beforehand, and all that is established, a social can be brief before things progress to "action". It's what's happened with my meets; pleasant social to confirm the chemistry/spark followed by loads of good sex  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A meet for a social is essential to see if mutual chemistry is established and the spark is there, particularly if you haven't spoken much to the person before.
That being said, if you've chatted plenty beforehand, and all that is established, a social can be brief before things progress to "action". It's what's happened with my meets; pleasant social to confirm the chemistry/spark followed by loads of good sex "
exactly got to have that click |
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On my old single profile ,I used to get this often.
I deduced they were either attached and couldnt risk being seen out with me,or just wanted a quick shag no effort.
Many never considered the safety aspect as a single woman and were happy to try and invite themselves over .
If they get arsey ,You know you made the right decision.Stand your ground op.
Miss |
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By *wo4FemCouple
over a year ago
Birmingham |
We prefer to have a social first as it gives all involved the oppotunity to see if we all have an attraction to one another. Of course there is the safety aspect of all as well and those who we meet are who they say they are and look like their photos. |
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"I will never understand why some men don't want to or can't be bothered to meet for a social before they expect me to hop into there bad .... they are often the ones who moan when they see I have another verification and I haven't met them! But even after explaining why they don't seem to do anything different! Wondered what other peoples thoughts on this are ... Do you think men who meet for socials first get more luck? Or do you not meet for socials and get the meets you want? If you don't like meeting for socials why is that? Ooh so many questions "
Always play by your rules. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I guess it depends on your definition of a social?
To me a social is meeting in a public place for a drink, whether that is a coffee or alcohol.
If on the other hand, you are talking about wining and dining, then I would suggest that is a date. Fab to me isn't a dating site, but there are plenty of sites that are. Use them. I ignore profiles that say they went wining and dining. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive met for socials first, I've also jumped in feet first as well. I just think it's getting a feel for a person that's important for some. Can everyone get to know each other by text? Can you know if your compatible without a social? Those are the questions you can only answer yourself, so if a guy wants to jump your bones without a social, he might just know. But do you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ive met for socials first, I've also jumped in feet first as well. I just think it's getting a feel for a person that's important for some. Can everyone get to know each other by text? Can you know if your compatible without a social? Those are the questions you can only answer yourself, so if a guy wants to jump your bones without a social, he might just know. But do you?"
^^^ yes this! But also found that having a good social before fucking doesn't guarantee a good meet whereas getting to know someone overtime via msging so far has turned out pretty damn good for us! 
Peach x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I guess it depends on your definition of a social?
To me a social is meeting in a public place for a drink, whether that is a coffee or alcohol.
If on the other hand, you are talking about wining and dining, then I would suggest that is a date. Fab to me isn't a dating site, but there are plenty of sites that are. Use them. I ignore profiles that say they went wining and dining."
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My meet criteria is social first at a time and place of my choosing with a view of a play meet at another date.
Take it or leave it.
If they don't want to, that's not a problem, no coercing etc block/move on, we're not compatible.
No one has to justify their preferences, pointless contacting someone not compatible!
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We always like to meet and have a drink first even if we play the same night. We have had one or two occasions where people are very different to thier profiles. Plus as said above the flirting, and sexual tension is all part of the fun |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it depends on the play. Some don't want that connection or don't want to have that friendly side. For some its pure sex and nothing more.
Me personally I prefer to have a social. Then if we hit it off then arrange to meet. Nothing more embarrassing than meeting up with someone after weeks of chatting, your eyes meet and there is no connection at all..... then what !!!! |
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