FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Meets lost interest

Meets lost interest

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

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By *lik and PaulCouple over a year ago

cahoots

This is why we go to the club....no pre planning so we are hot to trot

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"This is why we go to the club....no pre planning so we are hot to trot

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By *wo4FemCouple over a year ago

Birmingham

We always look forward to meeting up with new people. Even if you don't click it's always an experience.

Mr2

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

Personally though, I find it sad. I see it a lot from types who seem to be notorious offenders. I can understand not being interested and not replying but if you're going through the motions of planning something only to perpetually end up "Not bothering" then you may need to ask yourself if swinging is even right for you.

A lot of people on here have lives involving dependents and work...last thing people want is schedule something around something only for the other attendee to be lazy and selfish enough to waste your time.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"

Yer defo same here probably cause I've done nearly all my sexual fantasies by now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We always look forward to meeting up with new people. Even if you don't click it's always an experience.

Mr2

What a refreshingly open outlook... I wish there were more around here with your attitude!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs"

But your op says that u lose interest on the same day as the meet? Tbh that's the exact kind of silliness I am talking about. I am speaking to someone for the last week or so and we both talked about who miffed we would be if either of us jumped up on the day and ànnounced we couldn't show up. Commitments elsewhere are understandable...but then that's not really the premise of this thread....

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??"

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

I don't really want to jump down anyone's neck here. But I really think this is poor behaviour and I question if a guy made the same thread whether it would be seen favourable...esoecially considering how much people complain about "timewasting" and the site "going downhill".

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

Yea IF it was to happen id let them know but thats very rare id let anyone down. Jeez im gona stop posting on threads people cant wait to have a go.

Nice to be nice and all that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

Yea IF it was to happen id let them know but thats very rare id let anyone down. Jeez im gona stop posting on threads people cant wait to have a go.

Nice to be nice and all that"

As said. I don't wanna jump.down your throat but I would be lying if I was to say it was not a serious pet peeve. And it doesn't look good if ones only reason was if they list interest.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

Yea IF it was to happen id let them know but thats very rare id let anyone down. Jeez im gona stop posting on threads people cant wait to have a go.

Nice to be nice and all that

As said. I don't wanna jump.down your throat but I would be lying if I was to say it was not a serious pet peeve. And it doesn't look good if ones only reason was if they list interest."

Ok fab police point taken

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By *oiluvfunMan over a year ago

Penrith

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"

Not me, my available time is precious, so my meets are always planned in advance, and I usually can't wait to meet that person on the day

Clubs haven't worked for me, so I prefer to use Fab the way I do

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"

Happens all to often with us,and its mostly me,grey that loses interest.

I just get fed up with all the bullshit.

I now find the best meets are the spur of the moment meets.

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

I only meet for a social first time so it's not a problem if I'm not feeling it as such.

It's only a coffee, and, has in the past, led to great things

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

Yea IF it was to happen id let them know but thats very rare id let anyone down. Jeez im gona stop posting on threads people cant wait to have a go.

Nice to be nice and all that

As said. I don't wanna jump.down your throat but I would be lying if I was to say it was not a serious pet peeve. And it doesn't look good if ones only reason was if they list interest.

Ok fab police point taken"

There is another thread here with someone asking why people arrange meets only to cancel or block on the day.

Why do u like so many on here want to be supported for shitty behaviour??

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Happens all to often with us,and its mostly me,grey that loses interest.

I just get fed up with all the bullshit.

I now find the best meets are the spur of the moment meets."

Glad someone else sees my point of view i still go through with my meets but if ive lost a bit interest have to physche myself up for it again lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

Yea IF it was to happen id let them know but thats very rare id let anyone down. Jeez im gona stop posting on threads people cant wait to have a go.

Nice to be nice and all that

As said. I don't wanna jump.down your throat but I would be lying if I was to say it was not a serious pet peeve. And it doesn't look good if ones only reason was if they list interest.

Ok fab police point taken

There is another thread here with someone asking why people arrange meets only to cancel or block on the day.

Why do u like so many on here want to be supported for shitty behaviour??"

Where have i mentioned blocking ppl on the day?? Now your just picking an argument for the sake of it. Why dont u have a go at the other peopple whos agreed with me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I only meet for a social first time so it's not a problem if I'm not feeling it as such.

It's only a coffee, and, has in the past, led to great things

Ive tried socials but find the blokes always seem a bit pushy

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By *wo4FemCouple over a year ago

Birmingham

"We always look forward to meeting up with new people. Even if you don't click it's always an experience.

Mr2

What a refreshingly open outlook... I wish there were more around here with your attitude!"

We'd like to see more people around our way who enjoy our company as much as we enjoy theirs. Easier said than done when your trying to find someone who you would like to meet.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We always look forward to meeting up with new people. Even if you don't click it's always an experience.

Mr2

What a refreshingly open outlook... I wish there were more around here with your attitude!

We'd like to see more people around our way who enjoy our company as much as we enjoy theirs. Easier said than done when your trying to find someone who you would like to meet. "

Seems the world is an imperfect place.. and fab even more so

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"
this is me. To be honest planned in advance the chances are something will be said that would mean I lose all interest. All the build up talk Is a major turn off for me and the needing to keep in touch. I much prefer club meets as no need to have all that.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"

Then it's time to give up for a while,it clearly shows you have no enthusiasm for it at the moment. Why lead people on if you know the chances of you losing interest are pretty high.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Then it's time to give up for a while,it clearly shows you have no enthusiasm for it at the moment. Why lead people on if you know the chances of you losing interest are pretty high."

You don't know your going to lose interest till you actually lose interest

.it happens.We are human

And you are only leading folk on if you never had any intention of meeting in the first place.

We are all allowed to change our minds

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By *ibullMan over a year ago

swingingcuckville

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Then it's time to give up for a while,it clearly shows you have no enthusiasm for it at the moment. Why lead people on if you know the chances of you losing interest are pretty high."

Spot on with this

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Then it's time to give up for a while,it clearly shows you have no enthusiasm for it at the moment. Why lead people on if you know the chances of you losing interest are pretty high.

You don't know your going to lose interest till you actually lose interest

.it happens.We are human

And you are only leading folk on if you never had any intention of meeting in the first place.

We are all allowed to change our minds

its nice to know someone else thinks the moment you say youll meet it has to be set in stone.

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By *ighamCoupleCouple over a year ago

Higham Ferrers

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

Hear hear!

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Then it's time to give up for a while,it clearly shows you have no enthusiasm for it at the moment. Why lead people on if you know the chances of you losing interest are pretty high.

You don't know your going to lose interest till you actually lose interest

.it happens.We are human

And you are only leading folk on if you never had any intention of meeting in the first place.

We are all allowed to change our minds

Did you even read what she wrote?!

. She said she seems to lose interest really easy these day's which say's to me her heart or fanny isn't into it as much

...and of course you're allowed to change your mind what a stupid thing to say,but if you find you're doing it a fair bit lately then something isn't right!

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Then it's time to give up for a while,it clearly shows you have no enthusiasm for it at the moment. Why lead people on if you know the chances of you losing interest are pretty high.

Spot on with this

Thankyou

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By *lceeWoman over a year ago

Leeds

With some, I’d agree. A lot of the conversations end up being the same and if you don’t meet really quickly, then the momentum, that spark fades.

It’s not timewasting, it’s natural. Nobody owes anyone anything other than honesty and courtesy on here. OP, sounds like you provide both, so swing on

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sounds like you just want validation of your questionable behaviour.

Superfreak was polite, he just didn't agree with you. You did seek opinions after all.

Anyway - are you meeting these people socially first to figure out if you are actually red hot for them or not?

That's my suggestion

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Actually my other suggestion is to be more selective and to only agree to meet who you are really hot for and sure about.

I take a while to agree to meet and virtually never cancel.

I don't like all this "you're entitled to change your mind hun" stuff because it just supports mistreating the other party.

Learn to make better decisions upfront.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"Actually my other suggestion is to be more selective and to only agree to meet who you are really hot for and sure about.

I take a while to agree to meet and virtually never cancel.

I don't like all this "you're entitled to change your mind hun" stuff because it just supports mistreating the other party.

Learn to make better decisions upfront. "

You talk sense.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You talk sense."

I'd probably never cancel on you with such beautiful legs. PM if you like

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

You talk sense.

I'd probably never cancel on you with such beautiful legs. PM if you like

Probably?! That's so not good enough!

. I demand certainty,no flaky changing your mind at the last min!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've hidden my profile for this reason op.

Fab seems to have lost its sparkle for me at the moment.

I just don't seem to get the buzz out of it like I used to

Been trying to figure out what to do next.

Not sure if I've lost my mojo or I'm just having trouble finding what I need/want or even if I know what I want/need??

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

"With some, I’d agree. A lot of the conversations end up being the same and if you don’t meet really quickly, then the momentum, that spark fades.

It’s not timewasting, it’s natural. Nobody owes anyone anything other than honesty and courtesy on here. OP, sounds like you provide both, so swing on

Sorry I don't agree. If you commit to a meet, absent a good reason not to, common courtesy demands you should meet. "losing interest" is not a good reason.

I can't be doing with this idea that only ones own subjective feelings matter. We all have obligations to other people, even if we don't know them very well.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You talk sense.

I'd probably never cancel on you with such beautiful legs. PM if you like

Probably?! That's so not good enough!

. I demand certainty,no flaky changing your mind at the last min!

You but I have to know if you can fuck my mind as hard as my body first

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"With some, I’d agree. A lot of the conversations end up being the same and if you don’t meet really quickly, then the momentum, that spark fades.

It’s not timewasting, it’s natural. Nobody owes anyone anything other than honesty and courtesy on here. OP, sounds like you provide both, so swing on

Sorry I don't agree. If you commit to a meet, absent a good reason not to, common courtesy demands you should meet. "losing interest" is not a good reason.

I can't be doing with this idea that only ones own subjective feelings matter. We all have obligations to other people, even if we don't know them very well. "

See that's the thing. I don't actually meet anymore,but when I was and I'd got to the stage of actually arranging a day and time I knew I definitely wanted to meet them and wouldn't be changing my mind. I only made that arrangement with a 100% certainty I wanted to see them in the flesh.

When I started to feel flakey about thing's I knew that was the time to hide my profile and not mess anyone around.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

You talk sense.

I'd probably never cancel on you with such beautiful legs. PM if you like

Probably?! That's so not good enough!

. I demand certainty,no flaky changing your mind at the last min!

You but I have to know if you can fuck my mind as hard as my body first

Probably not I'm the silent type,I don't do the intelligent thing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We had a situation whereby a couple lost interest in us due to one of us not contributing enough to the group chat enough. This was despite face timing and exchanging pics.

It's understandable and we completely respect their decision while still knowing it doesn't actually reflect any lack of enthusiasm on our part.

We were actually worried it was the other way around as Irish quite classically loves to chat too much.

We appreciated their honest transparency in the end but wish they'd let us know so we could rectify any issues.

The couple remained open to us changing their mind at a club meet when they start attending clubs and we look forward to that.

All in all it's a much better outcome than going ahead with the meet if they felt we weren't right for them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"

Maybe you just enjoy the flirting and the thrill of the chase, but once a meet is agreed it's over for you? A little harsh on the other maybe but we are all grown ups after all..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"

This is why we only do short notice meet today meets, we get bored of waiting, and they either message too much and annoy us or disapear off fab,

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sounds like you just want validation of your questionable behaviour.

Superfreak was polite, he just didn't agree with you. You did seek opinions after all.

Anyway - are you meeting these people socially first to figure out if you are actually red hot for them or not?

That's my suggestion "

Exactly. This is what I see constantly on this forum. People wanting to be excused for bad behaviour...constantly.

I have a feeling its going to get to the point where we're going to have a thread titled "why I create fake profiles to lead men on" with many on here coming in and agreeing. The opinions in here can be bizarre at times.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"With some, I’d agree. A lot of the conversations end up being the same and if you don’t meet really quickly, then the momentum, that spark fades.

It’s not timewasting, it’s natural. Nobody owes anyone anything other than honesty and courtesy on here. OP, sounds like you provide both, so swing on

Sorry I don't agree. If you commit to a meet, absent a good reason not to, common courtesy demands you should meet. "losing interest" is not a good reason.

I can't be doing with this idea that only ones own subjective feelings matter. We all have obligations to other people, even if we don't know them very well. "

Wow!! Couldn't disagree more strongly.

The only person that matters to me is me!

How I feel is the most important thing to me. If I loose interest then yes, if I've arranged a meet then I'll happily explain why I no longer wish to meet but that's it. I don't owe some stranger on here anything.

There is no way I'm going to turn up to a meet if I'm not feeling it! That would be awful. I don't do sympathy shags and I definitely won't be have sex with someone just for the sake of it!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If i meet i meet for me not as i am obligated to

and sometimes we can all "agree" to meet someone for a drink and in that time they could blow it by a message or something that makes your gut feeling go "woah no"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wow... My arse

That's all well and good but what about manners and courtesy and goodwill to your fellow man?

If the shoe was on the other foot, how would you like it?

We live in a society but growing individualistic attitudes like the above will tear it apart.

The correct answer is.... Make your mind up properly and don't be so fickle.

Don't be a "timewaster"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Wow... My arse

That's all well and good but what about manners and courtesy and goodwill to your fellow man?

If the shoe was on the other foot, how would you like it?

We live in a society but growing individualistic attitudes like the above will tear it apart.

The correct answer is.... Make your mind up properly and don't be so fickle.

Don't be a "timewaster"

i would tell people

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There's a difference between a very good reason (like they reveal a layer of freakishness you can't entertain) and "I can't quite put my finger on it but i'm just not feeling it"

Better choices upfront

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

Sorry I don't agree. If you commit to a meet, absent a good reason not to, common courtesy demands you should meet. "losing interest" is not a good reason.

I can't be doing with this idea that only ones own subjective feelings matter. We all have obligations to other people, even if we don't know them very well. "

Seriously?

I arrange to meet soneone, along the way, chatting they say something, or maybe I find something out that causes me too lose interest.

But I'd still be expected to meet them, out of common courtesy?

Wow!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There's a difference between a very good reason (like they reveal a layer of freakishness you can't entertain) and "I can't quite put my finger on it but i'm just not feeling it"

Better choices upfront "

i think in time people learn that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Happens all to often with us,and its mostly me,grey that loses interest.

I just get fed up with all the bullshit.

I now find the best meets are the spur of the moment meets."

Exactly this. It's the bullshit! I've made plans and even hoped it doesn't go ahead cos of this. I'm presently disillusioned with the single guys on Fab.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

Yea IF it was to happen id let them know but thats very rare id let anyone down. Jeez im gona stop posting on threads people cant wait to have a go.

Nice to be nice and all that

As said. I don't wanna jump.down your throat but I would be lying if I was to say it was not a serious pet peeve. And it doesn't look good if ones only reason was if they list interest.

Ok fab police point taken

There is another thread here with someone asking why people arrange meets only to cancel or block on the day.

Why do u like so many on here want to be supported for shitty behaviour??

Where have i mentioned blocking ppl on the day?? Now your just picking an argument for the sake of it. Why dont u have a go at the other peopple whos agreed with me."

Because he's assuming you give out shitty behaviour rather than be a victim of it.

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By *ornylittlesubWoman over a year ago

Grangemouth

"There's a difference between a very good reason (like they reveal a layer of freakishness you can't entertain) and "I can't quite put my finger on it but i'm just not feeling it"

Better choices upfront "

I do have to agree with this and say the initial post OP will do you, and women on here, no favours! Alas the person who gave you most grief about it is someone with VERY questionable attitudes towards women. I soooo want to fight your corner, but wrong is wrong.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Wow... My arse

That's all well and good but what about manners and courtesy and goodwill to your fellow man?

If the shoe was on the other foot, how would you like it?

We live in a society but growing individualistic attitudes like the above will tear it apart.

The correct answer is.... Make your mind up properly and don't be so fickle.

Don't be a "timewaster"

Time waster gets thrown about a lot here, that isn't time wasting if they tell them, people's views change there is nothing wrong with changing your mind as long as you let the other person know

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Anyone is entitled to change their mind at any time before or during a meet. There is no incovenvience or social convention that overrides that freedom of autonomy and agency.

There is no such thing as "locked in" in terms of commitment with this.

It's the same as with sexual crimes, consent can be taken away as it can be given.

I recognise that it can be frustrating to cancel a meet you were looking forward to...we're in that exact position re our earlier mentioned couple but that's a price im happy to pay if the alternative is people feeling obliged to keep their promise despite not wanting to anymore.

If I was a single man I wouldn't want a couple or female to meet me unless I was 100% sure they wanted to too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A once in a blue moon change of mind sure but...

I think there is everything wrong with a pattern of fickleness.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A once in a blue moon change of mind sure but...

I think there is everything wrong with a pattern of fickleness. "

my only fickleness is what to wear LOL

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Then it's time to give up for a while,it clearly shows you have no enthusiasm for it at the moment. Why lead people on if you know the chances of you losing interest are pretty high."
where did I say we lead peolle on... I just stated I know I get bored so We just don't plan in advance.

It's not lack of enthusiasm its the fact the more I chat the less intreated I am. Meeting within an hour or two suits me just fine. Or just tell people we are going to a club/party and maybe catch up there.

We tried the chatting and building things up and it just is a recipe for disaster for me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Quite funny how its mostly the men disagreeing with me but the ladies can at least see my point of view

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Quite funny how its mostly the men disagreeing with me but the ladies can at least see my point of view"

id want to meet someone i was attracted to and wanted to get into bed rather than meet someone as i felt i agreed it and had to

fuck that!

i do agree with ya

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Quite funny how its mostly the men disagreeing with me but the ladies can at least see my point of view

id want to meet someone i was attracted to and wanted to get into bed rather than meet someone as i felt i agreed it and had to

fuck that!

i do agree with ya"

ive only ever cancelled twice due to illness. Just cant believe how many ppl are telling me i have shitty behaviour just coz i find some of the spark has gone by the time i meet.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Then it's time to give up for a while,it clearly shows you have no enthusiasm for it at the moment. Why lead people on if you know the chances of you losing interest are pretty high. where did I say we lead peolle on... I just stated I know I get bored so We just don't plan in advance.

We tried the chatting and building things up and it just is a recipe for disaster for me.

I do believe I was referring to the op,not you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Of course it's fine to lose interest. I think as long as there is honesty.

I've found that they guys who have bailed on me have given ridiculously elaborate excuses, and it's that, that boils my piss.

I can usually tell within the first few messages if I want to meet them or not. Then if I do, it's always a social do there is no pressure or expectation.

Had a guy a few weeks ago, can I meet. Yup ok, agreed a time and place, then can we meet earlier, um no. Aw ok, just he had to puck his kid up from Nursery at that time, but it's ok, he will just be late

Um. Needless to say he got lectured on the practices of Fatherhood.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I tend not to chat for too long./..

when u get to hows the weather...u know somethings wrong

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

The last guy i was going to meet on here decided to cancel on me by letting another lass on here tell me randomly and blocked me on everything......so at least my behaviour aint that shitty

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

Yea IF it was to happen id let them know but thats very rare id let anyone down. Jeez im gona stop posting on threads people cant wait to have a go.

Nice to be nice and all that

As said. I don't wanna jump.down your throat but I would be lying if I was to say it was not a serious pet peeve. And it doesn't look good if ones only reason was if they list interest.

Ok fab police point taken

There is another thread here with someone asking why people arrange meets only to cancel or block on the day.

Why do u like so many on here want to be supported for shitty behaviour??

Where have i mentioned blocking ppl on the day?? Now your just picking an argument for the sake of it. Why dont u have a go at the other peopple whos agreed with me.

Because he's assuming you give out shitty behaviour rather than be a victim of it."

Most of the time water seeks it's own level. Even with the women and couples who complain about all the oh so terrible guys on here. Spend all of five minutes listening to many and it becomes perfectly understandable why they always seem to meet bellends.

Lol be extremely fickle, passive aggressive and a timewaster and then expect to meet anyone other than those who will ultimately resent you...shocking stuff I say

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The last guy i was going to meet on here decided to cancel on me by letting another lass on here tell me randomly and blocked me on everything......so at least my behaviour aint that shitty"

Hmmm it's also funny now you're backtracking and making more and more excuses and obfuscation.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Quite funny how its mostly the men disagreeing with me but the ladies can at least see my point of view

id want to meet someone i was attracted to and wanted to get into bed rather than meet someone as i felt i agreed it and had to

fuck that!

i do agree with ya

ive only ever cancelled twice due to illness. Just cant believe how many ppl are telling me i have shitty behaviour just coz i find some of the spark has gone by the time i meet. "

1st rule of the internet sites: dont give a frigging shit what people think

you are a person, your own mind and so what if they want to tell you things, like you are going to listen and let them rule your life

fuck em, have fun and live your life by your rules

not by what the internet forums try to dictate x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"The last guy i was going to meet on here decided to cancel on me by letting another lass on here tell me randomly and blocked me on everything......so at least my behaviour aint that shitty

Hmmm it's also funny now you're backtracking and making more and more excuses and obfuscation. "

Its funny how you care so much....its not back tracking its me stating what happened lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Quite funny how its mostly the men disagreeing with me but the ladies can at least see my point of view

id want to meet someone i was attracted to and wanted to get into bed rather than meet someone as i felt i agreed it and had to

fuck that!

i do agree with ya

ive only ever cancelled twice due to illness. Just cant believe how many ppl are telling me i have shitty behaviour just coz i find some of the spark has gone by the time i meet.

1st rule of the internet sites: dont give a frigging shit what people think

you are a person, your own mind and so what if they want to tell you things, like you are going to listen and let them rule your life

fuck em, have fun and live your life by your rules

not by what the internet forums try to dictate x"

Translation: seek out internet forums for assurance of bad habits...when said assurance is not given cry, whine and claim that you never cared about the opinion of all these poopy heads anyway

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

We tried the chatting and building things up and it just is a recipe for disaster for me.

I do believe I was referring to the op,not you."
as you had quoted me.. it is understandable I assumed you were replying to me.

But either way. I get the op views on this.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Quite funny how its mostly the men disagreeing with me but the ladies can at least see my point of view

id want to meet someone i was attracted to and wanted to get into bed rather than meet someone as i felt i agreed it and had to

fuck that!

i do agree with ya

ive only ever cancelled twice due to illness. Just cant believe how many ppl are telling me i have shitty behaviour just coz i find some of the spark has gone by the time i meet.

1st rule of the internet sites: dont give a frigging shit what people think

you are a person, your own mind and so what if they want to tell you things, like you are going to listen and let them rule your life

fuck em, have fun and live your life by your rules

not by what the internet forums try to dictate x

Translation: seek out internet forums for assurance of bad habits...when said assurance is not given cry, whine and claim that you never cared about the opinion of all these poopy heads anyway

must be great to know it all

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

"With some, I’d agree. A lot of the conversations end up being the same and if you don’t meet really quickly, then the momentum, that spark fades.

It’s not timewasting, it’s natural. Nobody owes anyone anything other than honesty and courtesy on here. OP, sounds like you provide both, so swing on

Sorry I don't agree. If you commit to a meet, absent a good reason not to, common courtesy demands you should meet. "losing interest" is not a good reason.

I can't be doing with this idea that only ones own subjective feelings matter. We all have obligations to other people, even if we don't know them very well.

Wow!! Couldn't disagree more strongly.

The only person that matters to me is me!

There is no way I'm going to turn up to a meet if I'm not feeling it! That would be awful. I don't do sympathy shags and I definitely won't be have sex with someone just for the sake of it!!! "

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The last guy i was going to meet on here decided to cancel on me by letting another lass on here tell me randomly and blocked me on everything......so at least my behaviour aint that shitty

Hmmm it's also funny now you're backtracking and making more and more excuses and obfuscation.

Its funny how you care so much....its not back tracking its me stating what happened lol"

I don't really...but hey it's a discussion. I do admit though I can kinda curious as to why on earth people are ok with this though.

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

Again. I can understand if you decide not to meet someone if you chat further and they turn out to be an arse. That's different from serially arranging meets and then cancelling on the day because you are vaguely "not feeling it".

Of course everyone has a perfect right to cancel meets at the last minute for vague reasons. And the rest of us have a perfect right to say that is selfish self centered behaviour.

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex. "

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

Op. Your own words. You seem to lose interest really quickly these days.

This suggests to the casual reader that it's habitual and not a one off.

I am not going to make suggestions as others have done. At the end of the day you will do as you see fit.

Personally. If you and I agreed a meet, whether it was just a drink or the fully monty, and you wern't feeling it, I would prefer you to tell me. I think most people would actually prefer that deep down.

If it's happening a lot then maybe you are the issue.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"
maybe your not feeling horny and would like a dinner date better . lol

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

I don't know if it's an age or a gender thing (women know they can piss blokes off as there will still be a queue of willing guys), but if I agree to do something with or for someone in any part of life, absent good reasons like illness or bereavement, I do it, even if I don't feel like it at the time. To me that is basic good manners.

If I am at all uncertain about something I don't agree to do it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down. "

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Quite funny how its mostly the men disagreeing with me but the ladies can at least see my point of view

id want to meet someone i was attracted to and wanted to get into bed rather than meet someone as i felt i agreed it and had to

fuck that!

i do agree with ya

ive only ever cancelled twice due to illness. Just cant believe how many ppl are telling me i have shitty behaviour just coz i find some of the spark has gone by the time i meet.

1st rule of the internet sites: dont give a frigging shit what people think

you are a person, your own mind and so what if they want to tell you things, like you are going to listen and let them rule your life

fuck em, have fun and live your life by your rules

not by what the internet forums try to dictate x

Translation: seek out internet forums for assurance of bad habits...when said assurance is not given cry, whine and claim that you never cared about the opinion of all these poopy heads anyway

depends what the Op intention was.

if you have a rant or just ask advice

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

Lol i think i have been torn to shreds.

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

I agree a man would have been crucified.

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

Lol i think i have been torn to shreds. "

You really haven't.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Are you feeling stressed..? Libido issues..?

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By *elle_Oh_BelleWoman over a year ago

London

Totally understand...

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By *r C Miss CCouple over a year ago

llanelli

We get cancelled on quite often. It doesnt bother us anymore. We just move on. Sure it can be a pain in the arse. But thats life people change their minds. We are going to have fun no matter what happens. It sucks sometimes as we have arranged a dog sitter, taken a day off work. What ever, but we dont dwell on it. The way we see it. Its their loss not ours. Although we dont like getting cancelled on. We wouldnt want to meet anyone that has any doubts about meeting us and no one should feel obligated to meet anyone.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

We tried the chatting and building things up and it just is a recipe for disaster for me.

I do believe I was referring to the op,not you. as you had quoted me.. it is understandable I assumed you were replying to me.

But either way. I get the op views on this. "

Did I?! Apologies if I did I can't be bothered checking back,I certainly didn't mean to!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"

Yes same here, I have lost interest in meets lately.I loose interest when chatting now and have lost interest on the day too. It isn't the same without my former FWB to report back to. I,m thinking of calling it quits, coz it's getting too much of a hassle.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

Yeah. And I am never not amazed at just how pathetic the double standards are here.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

We tried the chatting and building things up and it just is a recipe for disaster for me.

I do believe I was referring to the op,not you. as you had quoted me.. it is understandable I assumed you were replying to me.

But either way. I get the op views on this.

Did I?! Apologies if I did I can't be bothered checking back,I certainly didn't mean to!"

I take that apology back as I didn't quote you,I just posted underneath you...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

Consent for sex can be withdrawn at any time, even at the meet itself. I don't call that silliness. Nobody is obliged to fuck anyone, even if it's been planned. It is not poor behaviour at all. And shock, horror.....men do it too.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

So the OP is a timewaster then, clearly with no regard for other people, let's hope no-one is fool enough to arrange to meet him in future after reading this thread!

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

So the OP is a timewaster then, clearly with no regard for other people, let's hope no-one is fool enough to arrange to meet him in future after reading this thread!"

The op is a she.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

it would be interesting to see the responses if a male posted this

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

For the second time, we are talking about meeting not fucking. Does anyone go into a meet saying sex is guaranteed? We don't

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

Did i say i cancelled??

Lol but u said "u let them know". Lol you let them know that you're not interested but still meet up? That's kinda strange?

A meet is not sexual consent. Not even close. I've had meets tell me they're not feeling it and we parted ways on good grounds. You should not even really remotely have in mind that meeting means u must have sex. So no, not even cloee. As said people want to excuse bad behaviour.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've had a few couple's cancel meets now and the reasons have been nigh on ridiculous. It puts me off. I'm more inclined to seek a meet on the day now.

I'm talking about people that meet for a social. Keep in touch by messages, agree a date then, sorry but... has happened.

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By *ornylittlesubWoman over a year ago

Grangemouth

Personally I think why this post has "raised eyebrows" and caused so much debate is because of the apparent flippant way the OP posted about loosing interest in arranged meets....and no doubt if it was a guy's post, god help him! Of course we all have the right to do as we see fit regarding...cancelling,arranging,bumping...any meets we make. But then we have to be prepared to be judged by our actions...male OR female! Whats good for the goose is good for the gander! And please, its only an opinion, we all have them...and we all think ours is right!

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By *inful xWoman over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

People change their minds on here like the wind. They're entitled to of course however if you're doing this on a regular basis you should really take a break and stop swinging. It's damn annoying and frustrating when you have it happen to you.

For this reason it's much easier to meet at clubs.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"People change their minds on here like the wind. They're entitled to of course however if you're doing this on a regular basis you should really take a break and stop swinging. It's damn annoying and frustrating when you have it happen to you.

For this reason it's much easier to meet at clubs. "

To be honest the only thing that bugged me was ops flippant nature and the playing victim when getting called out. It's so common on this forums and so goddamn weaselish. Changing your mind is understandable but when you're doing it the same day and claiming that u can't be bothered as the reason then you're really deluded to think people are going to be okaying that.

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By *lceeWoman over a year ago

Leeds

You see, I don’t read whether a post is written by a male, female or couple. I couldn't give two hoots - the advice remains the same.

As long as the OP isn’t standing people up, there’s no lack of courtesy. She doesn’t appear to be standing people up. Therefore there’s no questions of manners or lack thereof. She’s not timewasting as she’s telling them that she’s changed her mind. Or are we attempting to say that the physical few minutes spent sending messages back and forth are time wasted. Are none of us capable of carrying on more than one conversation at a time?

The spark does die down, quite often. That’s not the fault of either side - these flings have an expiry date and someone that turns you into a towering inferno of heat the day before can leave you a bit cold the next day. If someone felt obliged to meet up with me after the spark has gone for them, to me that would be heinous.

We’re all busy, we all have lives. If someone didn’t really feel it any more, I would be tempted to say they were a timewaster for taking up my precious socialising time when they had no intention of it going any further.

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By *ancs MinxWoman over a year ago

Burnley

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"

Not very nice though if they have arranged to be free that day, sure you would not like it, if the shoe was on the other foot.

Treat people as you would expect to be treated.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"You see, I don’t read whether a post is written by a male, female or couple. I couldn't give two hoots - the advice remains the same.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

For this reason it's much easier to meet at clubs.

oing to be okaying that. "

Theres a difference between losing the spark and cant be bothered!!! And theres no need to start insulting me!!!!

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

I agree a man would have been crucified."

I'm not sure if you're referring to me or the OP here.

I am certainly not a thrill chaser.

I've only ever cancelled 2 social meets & that was after something 1 wrote in a message, the other discovering something about the person.

Both were told the reason why I'd changed my mind & accepted my reasons

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

I agree a man would have been crucified.

I'm not sure if you're referring to me or the OP here.

I am certainly not a thrill chaser.

I've only ever cancelled 2 social meets & that was after something 1 wrote in a message, the other discovering something about the person.

Both were told the reason why I'd changed my mind & accepted my reasons

I was specifically referring to your comment that a man would have been torn to shreds if starting this thread. Sorry for the confusion.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We don't feel comfortable with the concept of 'changing ones mind' even though everybody has the right to do so. I feel that if I were to 'change my mind', I would potentially be messing people about. We don't want to mess people about so we make sure we definately want to meet someone before those arrangements are made. But because we would never cancel we are very careful about making arrangements. For us, when it goes in the diary it's carved in stone, and we assume that's the case with the person we are meeting. If they don't want to the meet set in stone I would hope they would be honest with us and say that it is only pencilled in. At least that way we can make an informed choice as to whether we wish to arrange our diary around them. Only once have we felt a bit cool about a forthcoming meeting, but we went ahead with it because we had commited, and we realised we were wrong to doubt him.

Mrs

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

"We don't feel comfortable with the concept of 'changing ones mind' even though everybody has the right to do so. I feel that if I were to 'change my mind', I would potentially be messing people about. We don't want to mess people about so we make sure we definately want to meet someone before those arrangements are made. But because we would never cancel we are very careful about making arrangements. For us, when it goes in the diary it's carved in stone, and we assume that's the case with the person we are meeting. If they don't want to the meet set in stone I would hope they would be honest with us and say that it is only pencilled in. At least that way we can make an informed choice as to whether we wish to arrange our diary around them. Only once have we felt a bit cool about a forthcoming meeting, but we went ahead with it because we had commited, and we realised we were wrong to doubt him.

Mrs"

This reply shows you are worthy of your user name.

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By *ornylittlesubWoman over a year ago

Grangemouth

Mrs"

Common sense, good sense, good practise.

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

Mrs"

Exactly.

Without sounding too much like an old fogey, there's a lot of personal narcissism around now where the only valid thing is seen as ones immediate desires and how dare you say I have obligations to other people...

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By *sGivesWoodWoman over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Makes no difference if its male or female, still a timewaster in my book, apologies, predictive text missed out the s in earlier post

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By *lceeWoman over a year ago

Leeds

Mrs"

I think that’s more than fair. I’d always tell someone if the social is only potential rather than definite. Once a meet is a meet, I tend to meet up even when I shouldn’t

*shifts uncomfortably remembering the stomach bug episode*

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

I agree a man would have been crucified.

I'm not sure if you're referring to me or the OP here.

I am certainly not a thrill chaser.

I've only ever cancelled 2 social meets & that was after something 1 wrote in a message, the other discovering something about the person.

Both were told the reason why I'd changed my mind & accepted my reasons

I was specifically referring to your comment that a man would have been torn to shreds if starting this thread. Sorry for the confusion."

I didn't make that comment

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days"

I must admit I do the same. I'm cancelling more than ever these days and sticking to the regular ones I meet. Must be my age

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs"

So it's ok if you mess them about?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

I must admit I do the same. I'm cancelling more than ever these days and sticking to the regular ones I meet. Must be my age

Shhhh youll be labelled a timewaster

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

So it's ok if you mess them about? "

And where did i say that? Love the people crucifying me on here for putting words into my mouth as ive previously stated ive only ever cancelled twice and for genuine reasons

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

I agree a man would have been crucified.

I'm not sure if you're referring to me or the OP here.

I am certainly not a thrill chaser.

I've only ever cancelled 2 social meets & that was after something 1 wrote in a message, the other discovering something about the person.

Both were told the reason why I'd changed my mind & accepted my reasons

I was specifically referring to your comment that a man would have been torn to shreds if starting this thread. Sorry for the confusion.

I didn't make that comment "

Ah i must have got confused who was quoting who!

Sorry!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

I must admit I do the same. I'm cancelling more than ever these days and sticking to the regular ones I meet. Must be my age

Shhhh youll be labelled a timewaster "

lol I give plenty of notice if I cancel but yes the thought of meeting someone new and going through it all gets boring at times, least with a regular you know each other. Don't get me wrong I love the excitement of meeting a new playmate but haven't always got the time. Least with a regular you can call them usually the same day to come over.

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

I agree a man would have been crucified.

I'm not sure if you're referring to me or the OP here.

I am certainly not a thrill chaser.

I've only ever cancelled 2 social meets & that was after something 1 wrote in a message, the other discovering something about the person.

Both were told the reason why I'd changed my mind & accepted my reasons

I was specifically referring to your comment that a man would have been torn to shreds if starting this thread. Sorry for the confusion.

I didn't make that comment "

Just scrolled back. You quoted my reply to a comment made by bella donna.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

So it's ok if you mess them about?

And where did i say that? Love the people crucifying me on here for putting words into my mouth as ive previously stated ive only ever cancelled twice and for genuine reasons"

So, while you try not to waste time, most of those you meet have no tie downs....what does that mean?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

I agree a man would have been crucified.

I'm not sure if you're referring to me or the OP here.

I am certainly not a thrill chaser.

I've only ever cancelled 2 social meets & that was after something 1 wrote in a message, the other discovering something about the person.

Both were told the reason why I'd changed my mind & accepted my reasons

I was agreeing with your comments about the OP hence quoting your post...not aimed at you at all

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

I agree a man would have been crucified."
why would they. And to be fair I think the op has been jumped on quite hard.

She hasn't said she is planning loads of meets and bailing. Just that she has found recently she has been finding that a long wait means she is losing interest does anyone else feel the same. Male or female id have said the same.

But then I've always been one for spur of the moment over long time arranged..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

So it's ok if you mess them about?

And where did i say that? Love the people crucifying me on here for putting words into my mouth as ive previously stated ive only ever cancelled twice and for genuine reasons"

I think people have misunderstood you. In your OP you said that you lose interest on the day of the meet. Admittedly I, and many others, thought that you losing interest led to you cancelling. If this is not the case, and in actual fact you go ahead with the meet you have lost interest in, then I can only apologise for jumping to conclusions. But in fairness your OP is a bit confusing.

Mrs

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By *lceeWoman over a year ago

Leeds

This has turned into a really nasty, judgey thread. I’ll never understand that rule of forums - someone puts themselves out there and people band together to tear them down. We all have different opinions and that’s awesome. But having scrolled through, the OP has been called pathetic, timewaster, fickle and told to switch her profile off to stop messing people around, just for saying that she’s finding that the spark is going a little quicker than before.

Having read through the whole thread, she never said she stands people up, she never says she actually cancels the meets (except for twice) yet for that people have, both aggressively or with friendly concern, denounced her supposed behaviour.

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Well...its not really a problem provided you tell them in the advance.

I always let them know and i have other responsibilities too so try not to waste time tho tbf most of my meets involve guys who dont have any tie downs

So it's ok if you mess them about?

And where did i say that? Love the people crucifying me on here for putting words into my mouth as ive previously stated ive only ever cancelled twice and for genuine reasons

So, while you try not to waste time, most of those you meet have no tie downs....what does that mean?"

Exactly what it says someone was saying what about ppl with responsibilities and i just happen to meet people who dont seem to have any?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

I didn't suggest you should have sex with anyone. You have agreed to meet. That's all. We all know that a meet doesn't guarantee sex.

Your are right, not every social meet I go on leads to sex.. But it's a possibility.

I have a life, children, 3 jobs, any free time I have is precious.

So I certainly wouldn't waste it meeting someone, I no longer, for whatever reason, had no intrest in, and knowing that I definitely wouldn't be meeting them again.

That would be classed as leading them on, surely?

If it's a serial thing where you arrange meets then lose interest on the day, I would suggest you stop arranging meets. It's unfair on people you let down.

This. It suggests you like the thrill of the chase and nothing more. If the OP was a man he'd have been torn to shreds

I agree a man would have been crucified. why would they. And to be fair I think the op has been jumped on quite hard.

But then I've always been one for spur of the moment over long time arranged.. "

Quite right. Why would they or should they. Fact is they would.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Leave the OP alone, she's perfectly within her right to cancel meets like we are. Things come up like childcare issues, illness etc and cancellation happens. I've cancelled a few meets and sometimes because I can't be arsed to go out. Yes if that makes me a timewaster so be. But I've never not turned up for a meet I always tell the person beforehand why I can't.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"This has turned into a really nasty, judgey thread. I’ll never understand that rule of forums - someone puts themselves out there and people band together to tear them down. We all have different opinions and that’s awesome. But having scrolled through, the OP has been called pathetic, timewaster, fickle and told to switch her profile off to stop messing people around, just for saying that she’s finding that the spark is going a little quicker than before.

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*"

Thank you this whole thread has upset me how everyone can just put words into my mouth just to join the bandwagon of having a go at me.one little post should not have got me all this abuse but there u go ill just go lick my wounds and be the victim im apparently playing

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By *lceeWoman over a year ago

Leeds

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Nah, go out with a bang, every time!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Nah, go out with a bang, every time!

Yea but i dont bang as people are implying on here

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Fuck them OP don't let the nasty ones on here upset you. As soon as I read your post I thought that's me I feel the same.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

"Leave the OP alone, she's perfectly within her right to cancel meets like we are. Things come up like childcare issues, illness etc and cancellation happens. I've cancelled a few meets and sometimes because I can't be arsed to go out. Yes if that makes me a timewaster so be. But I've never not turned up for a meet I always tell the person beforehand why I can't. "

No ones saying things don't happen that cause you to cancel a meet up. Things do happen. But also you mention an example there that is valid for the other side. Child care. This is just one of many reasons why a fair number of people have to plan in advance. If someone has booked travel, arranged a hotel or whatever and the other person cancels because they simply can't be arsed that's not nice is it. If given enough warning then these things aren't so much an issue. For a one of off occurence ok but the op suggests she's feeling not into it a lot recently. That suggets it's more likely that she will cancel meets at this present time. Surely under those circumstances it would be prudent to take a break from pre planning meets for a little while until her mojo comes back?

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

I don't think anyone has or had the intention to upset you. Meet cancellations are an emotive subject that's all.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I find these type of threads are divided in 2 camps. Those, like ourselves, who never cancel except for sickness/real emergencies etc. And those who have a more relaxed approach to diary planning, where nothing is truly carved in stone until the day as something might come up, or they might change their minds for whatever reason. There is probably no right and wrong. It's just best to arrange meets with those who have a similar approach to diary management.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker..."

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker..

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

I don't think anyone has or had the intention to upset you. Meet cancellations are an emotive subject that's all."

Implying im weaslish and time waster yea ok not upsetting at all

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker.."

Is calling someone weaselisj for expecting everyone to cater to their opinion really an insult? It's an observation. You're well, WELL within your right to disagree. But claiming that everyone is bullying you is quite asinine. There are a healthy mix of opinions in this thread agreeing with you and disagreeing and yet here u are crying about being bullied. Should we all.just sit there and agree that everything you have said is wonderful???

Seems a little childish.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I talk for a while before meeting anyone. I'll lose interest way before we got to the day of meeting.

If I kept losing interest I'd have a rest from the arranging to meet on here.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker..

Seems a little childish."

Your the childish one, I've read the whole of this thread and you jumped on the OP straightaway. Not once did she say she didn't turn up for a meet. Like myself we can't always meet, or should we just leave fab altogether for being timewasters.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker..

Seems a little childish."

No your quite within your rights to disagree but when it comes to name calling then that i find quite childish!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have you thought about why you keep losing interest?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker..

Seems a little childish.

As others have said more diplomatically...it says a lot if you keep cancelling on people for a "loss of interest". Trying to use sophistry to explain away what is essentially cancelling is not something people find kosher. Cancelling sucks. Even more so if 1. The person keeps doing it and 2. There is not much of a reason beyond not being interested. You may not agree with me on this, but I never really rely on any a posters opinion beyond the opening one. You often find that it can suddenly change drastically depending upon it's reception. It's something I guess we are all guilty of.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

I don't think anyone has or had the intention to upset you. Meet cancellations are an emotive subject that's all.

Implying im weaslish and time waster yea ok not upsetting at all"

People only called you a 'timewaster' when they thought you were cancelling meets on the day as a result of losing interest, when ch seemed to be the suggestion in your OP. But you have since explained that you don't cancel meets due to loss of interest. I don't think anybody has called you a 'timewaster' since you explained it better, and if they have maybe they didn't see you latter explanation. However, people will always have opinions on what they think a 'timewaster' is, and thet are entitled to express that. The word 'timewaster' is not an abusive word, it's merely a subjective opinion on someone's behaviour.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I find these type of threads are divided in 2 camps. Those, like ourselves, who never cancel except for sickness/real emergencies etc. And those who have a more relaxed approach to diary planning, where nothing is truly carved in stone until the day as something might come up, or they might change their minds for whatever reason. There is probably no right and wrong. It's just best to arrange meets with those who have a similar approach to diary management.

Mrs"
we to be fair wouldn't cancel if an actual date had been set unless something came up. So we tend to rarely set anything in stone. More a if we happen to see you at such and such say hi.

Although to be fair. Mr does enjoy the lead up and chase but because I dont it can seem like im not interested as I will keep out of group chats ( so much so we dont do group chats now)

I DO think the op did get jumped on somewhat but lately its been a side the forum has been showing more and more.

But people should always say what they feel but without being petty or nasty.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker..

Seems a little childish."

Did i actually say i cancelled alot tho? No u just decided to imply or suggest i did in my original post putting words in my mouth

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

I don't think anyone has or had the intention to upset you. Meet cancellations are an emotive subject that's all.

Implying im weaslish and time waster yea ok not upsetting at all"

Im not sure what weaslish was intended to convey in all honesty.

If you repeatedly cancel meets due to not being arsed then your wasting your own time as much as anyone elses.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker..

Seems a little childish.

Did i actually say i cancelled alot tho? No u just decided to imply or suggest i did in my original post putting words in my mouth"

You said you lost interest a lot on the day, and people assumed you cancelled a lot as a result of the loss of interest. I'm guessing you lose interest but go ahead with the meet anyway? If that's the case that is a different discussion.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you repeatedly cancel meets due to not being arsed then your wasting your own time as much as anyone elses. "
at no point has the op said she does this. So she isn't wasting anyone's time.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

I don't think anyone has or had the intention to upset you. Meet cancellations are an emotive subject that's all.

Implying im weaslish and time waster yea ok not upsetting at all

Im not sure what weaslish was intended to convey in all honesty.

If you repeatedly cancel meets due to not being arsed then your wasting your own time as much as anyone elses. "

It was more about conveying the fact that a lot of OPs start with the poster detailing some irritating thing they do. You have threads which go the other way and then all of a sudden the OP starts saying he/she is a victim or is being bullied. Happens all the time on here.

As correctly stated before, calling someone a timewaster is in no way insulting and the fact that its being taken as such makes me wonder if OP is indeed just backtracking. I could very well be wrong though.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The position has to be that no one has to go on a meet unless they really up for it. A person has the right to change their mind.

However it has always puzzled me when people have said they were not sure they would be still up for it when a meet has been booked far advance. Maybe in Jack Nicholson's words 'I am your average horny devil' and like a lower league boxer once my gloves are on I am ready to take on all comers.

The difficulty I found is as a single man is trying to keep a vibe going between the other party for more than two weeks. With some people they need to be in the zone and feeling the vibe or they lose interest. My rules were never book a hotel in advance that can't be cancelled on the day or arrange meets more than an hour's drive, and always have a plan b (either of the London spas accessible if the person did not turn up).

As a single man you get used to getting blown out.

The alternative was going to clubs but after a while I realised that it was a time consuming and expensive way to achieve satisfaction.

To quote

'Sex: the pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous, and the expense damnable.'

Philip Stanhope, 4th Earl of Chesterfield

Now I don't swing, or even bother with clubs.

The point people were trying to make to OP, is that people have little time to spare in a busy life and they incur costs to arrange a meet. Therefore it is frustrating to be blown out on the day if someone is not feeling it. Previously single men are told to suck it up and move on. But now couples and single women are experiencing last minute let down people are needing to vent, so it is not personal to OP.

No reasonable person would want her to go on a meet for the sake of it, but if she is no longer feeling it, there is no shame in not arranging meets.

As for being cussed off this is mild. I have been insulted on threads and as a result of one I had someone pm me insult me and then block me from replying and I am still here.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What is the problem if she does change her mind on the day and cancels that's up to her, if we arrange something then at the time don't feel up for it we would cancel in a heartbeat. Its not time wasting it's just changing your mind.

If someone was arranging meets they had no intention of attending then that is time wasting.

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

If you repeatedly cancel meets due to not being arsed then your wasting your own time as much as anyone elses. at no point has the op said she does this. So she isn't wasting anyone's time.

I used the word if not when. I have not actually called her a timewaster. Others have. In my original post I said I would prefer to know if she was not feeling it. And went on to suggest a break. If she is not feeling the scene currently then she is wasteing her own time at the very least. I further pointed out that cancelled meets are annoying and an emotive subject and that's why spirits are high in this thread. Some people are eluding to the fact that that she has cancelled meets. She maintans that not to be the case but some here simply do not believe her. As Elcee pointed out there are different opinions.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

yeah it's been helping to us a lot or they just stop talking to us

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I wouldn't be happy if someone still had sex with me, even though they had lost interest.

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By *inful xWoman over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

"I wouldn't be happy if someone still had sex with me, even though they had lost interest. "

Exactly

Either way I think the reason you feel like this needs addressing and until then you should take a break

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

"What is the problem if she does change her mind on the day and cancels that's up to her, if we arrange something then at the time don't feel up for it we would cancel in a heartbeat. Its not time wasting it's just changing your mind.

If someone was arranging meets they had no intention of attending then that is time wasting."

No problem changing your mind at the last minute. Its a basic human right of course. If someone has made arrangements for that meet. Child care, travel, hotel, time off work etc. Don't expect flowers or sympathy on a forum post.

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

"The position has to be that no one has to go on a meet unless they really up for it. A person has the right to change their mind.

As a single man you get used to getting blown out.

The alternative was going to clubs but after a while I realised that it was a time consuming and expensive way to achieve satisfaction.

To quote

'Sex: the pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous, and the expense damnable.'

Philip Stanhope, 4th Earl of Chesterfield

Now I don't swing, or even bother with clubs.

No reasonable person would want her to go on a meet for the sake of it, but if she is no longer feeling it, there is no shame in not arranging meets.

As for being cussed off this is mild. I have been insulted on threads and as a result of one I had someone pm me insult me and then block me from replying and I am still here.

Absolutely. This is one of the tamest having a go threads I have seen.

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By *oulman1966Man over a year ago

London

Totally agree !!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If someone was arranging meets they had no intention of attending then that is time wasting."

I'm not sure that she is cancelling, she just says she loses interest onthe day. However, if someone did change their mind and cancel us on the day, that would be a huge problem to us, and rightly or wrongly we would feel messed about. We would wonder why they didn't warn us that the meet was only pencilled in and that they might cancel on the day. It's happened to us before, arranged babysitting specially, so when plans fall away it's a total waste. Well to us anyway, just not someone we can handle. But different people have different views on this matter.

Mrs

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker..

Seems a little childish.

I don't feel he jumped on her,he just gave his opinion which the op didn't like that's all.

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By *utsidenakedMan over a year ago

Dorchester

I arrange meets and no one ever turns up, always some lame excuse

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker..

Seems a little childish.

I don't feel he jumped on her,he just gave his opinion which the op didn't like that's all. "

Ok name calling the norm in here then must remember that putting words in my mouth must be ok too then ill keep that in mind too

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker..

Seems a little childish.

I don't feel he jumped on her,he just gave his opinion which the op didn't like that's all.

Ok name calling the norm in here then must remember that putting words in my mouth must be ok too then ill keep that in mind too "

For god's sake. You said you lost interest on the day of the meet. He replied to you in a very reasonable way. Then it got out of hand with comments from both of you. This thread has followed a downward spiral.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Can’t we just accept we all have different views?

*goes to find an air raid shelter to huddle in*

Oh look. Now you've run to play victim. Shocker...

Oh look your back to abuse me more....shocker..

Seems a little childish.

I don't feel he jumped on her,he just gave his opinion which the op didn't like that's all.

Ok name calling the norm in here then must remember that putting words in my mouth must be ok too then ill keep that in mind too

Sorry cant remember insulting with like. Yes people can have difference of opinions but theres a difference between disagreeing and just insulting some one

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Happens all to often with us,and its mostly me,grey that loses interest.

I just get fed up with all the bullshit.

I now find the best meets are the spur of the moment meets.

Exactly this. It's the bullshit! I've made plans and even hoped it doesn't go ahead cos of this. I'm presently disillusioned with the single guys on Fab."

Just reported and blocked a no show.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"How many ppl plan meets in advance then the day arrives and your not intetested no more lol. I seem to lose interest really quick these days

Happens all to often with us,and its mostly me,grey that loses interest.

I just get fed up with all the bullshit.

I now find the best meets are the spur of the moment meets.

Exactly this. It's the bullshit! I've made plans and even hoped it doesn't go ahead cos of this. I'm presently disillusioned with the single guys on Fab.

Just reported and blocked a no show."

Ive never no showed

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We get cancelled on quite often. It doesnt bother us anymore. We just move on. Sure it can be a pain in the arse. But thats life people change their minds. We are going to have fun no matter what happens. It sucks sometimes as we have arranged a dog sitter, taken a day off work. What ever, but we dont dwell on it. The way we see it. Its their loss not ours. Although we dont like getting cancelled on. We wouldnt want to meet anyone that has any doubts about meeting us and no one should feel obligated to meet anyone."

Being cancelled on is far better than an arsehole, at the approx time of the meet, still implying he's coming to meet you as arranged.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Being cancelled on is far better than an arsehole, at the approx time of the meet, still implying he's coming to meet you as arranged."

Yea ive deffo not done that had it happen a few times to me tho

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Mrs"

To me, it's not set in stone until the morning of the meet. I insist on confirmation it's going ahead or a last minute get out clause. I'd rather this than have a no show. No communication = cancellation of meeting.

Today was my first ever no show. I suspected it would happen (female intuition) and hadn't gone out my way, ie i was in town for a prior reason.

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By *ayMaxxxMan over a year ago

Windsor

You still seem to be overlooking the fact that the OP hasn't cancelled meets due to a dwindling interest. She simply reported a lack of interest as the date of said meet approaches.

I can understand this wasn't completely clear from the opening post, but neither was it clearly stated that she was cancelling meets. You're coming across as quite agressive and clinging to a misunderstanding.

Opinions are like arse holes; we've all got one and this is mine

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