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Mistakes and lessons learned

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I imagine many of us have made mistakes while navigating the world of swinging/online adult dating.

What mistakes have you made here that make you cringe to think about now, but were useful in developing yourself into the swinger you are now?

I'll go first. When I was on a different adult dating site, I sent a bathroom dick pic to a lady, and you could see the toilet bowl in the background Luckily she was polite in pointing out how unappealing that is, and I've never done it since. The lesson: always consider the background of the pics you take!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I told a girl a little too much detail about my personal life and let's just say she wasn't discreet, which resulted in a few people knowing about my business on fab. Lesson learned, no face pics on here and not too much info shared

The other lesson is giving out my number. I received an explicit photo via a whatsapp which I had not asked for and wasn't expecting, which I opened at my desk in work. A colleague sat next to me caught a glimpse. I've had another fabber constantly phoning and requesting FaceTime video calls, which you can't always answering when you're working, sat on a train or with your kids. It got to a point where I eventually changed my number because I'd come off fab, had started a vanilla relationship and had explained several times that I wasn't meeting. All were very awkward situations. I only message on here or sometimes use kik

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Sent an erotic picture to a guy showing our faces. Once. Never again.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I told a girl a little too much detail about my personal life and let's just say she wasn't discreet, which resulted in a few people knowing about my business on fab. Lesson learned, no face pics on here and not too much info shared

The other lesson is giving out my number. I received an explicit photo via a whatsapp which I had not asked for and wasn't expecting, which I opened at my desk in work. A colleague sat next to me caught a glimpse. I've had another fabber constantly phoning and requesting FaceTime video calls, which you can't always answering when you're working, sat on a train or with your kids. It got to a point where I eventually changed my number because I'd come off fab, had started a vanilla relationship and had explained several times that I wasn't meeting. All were very awkward situations. I only message on here or sometimes use kik "

That's annoying, having to change your number because of harassment from a member here. I used to assume it was men who did the harassing!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't think you can stereotype harassment to a particular sex, however from reading the forums it does appear some men hound the women and couples here

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple  over a year ago

Halifax

On my old single profile,i gave my mob number out ,one idiot took advantage by texting at all hours.I couldnt even switch my mobile off,as my dad was ill. never again after that.

Miss

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

About a year ago I quit Fab and cut my ties with the world of swinging thinking I was done with it all. Tried the likes of POF, Badoo, eharmony etc.

Big mistake for me personally. When someone asks about your previous love life and you answer honestly (I'm not ashamed of being a swinger), you can imagine the look of horror on their faces. Now I'm back swinging and I've genuinely missed everything about it.

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By *otandStickyCouple  over a year ago

Poole

The dumbest thing we did was send a pic of our faces when THEY requested it, they never sent us one back because they said they knew us...we are sure they didn't, but they should have sent the pic 1st if they wanted to see us, if we ask we will send a pic, we expect the same now if others ask. The other dumb thing we did was allow a couple we have met once to drive us to the club, when we wanted to get the hell outta there we got a very expensive taxi back to the hotel (they got v.d*unk and it got a bit sketchy...long story) we now always make sure we can get home under our own steam.

The picture this was more of us being annoyed rather than a big drama

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"The dumbest thing we did was send a pic of our faces when THEY requested it, they never sent us one back because they said they knew us...we are sure they didn't, but they should have sent the pic 1st if they wanted to see us, if we ask we will send a pic, we expect the same now if others ask. The other dumb thing we did was allow a couple we have met once to drive us to the club, when we wanted to get the hell outta there we got a very expensive taxi back to the hotel (they got v.d*unk and it got a bit sketchy...long story) we now always make sure we can get home under our own steam.

The picture this was more of us being annoyed rather than a big drama "

Still, valuable lessons learned here - always best not to rely on people you barely know

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"About a year ago I quit Fab and cut my ties with the world of swinging thinking I was done with it all. Tried the likes of POF, Badoo, eharmony etc.

Big mistake for me personally. When someone asks about your previous love life and you answer honestly (I'm not ashamed of being a swinger), you can imagine the look of horror on their faces. Now I'm back swinging and I've genuinely missed everything about it."

I made a similar mistake a few months ago. I didn't get as far as vanilla dating, I just got a massive case of cold feet and got paranoid about being recognised at work or in general, so I quit Fab cold turkey, just deleted my profile, even deleted my Kik account. My biggest mistake was not telling the few ladies I was chatting with.

A month or 2 later I came crawling back (we all do), and as is to be expected, I'm not in their good books at all. The lesson I took from it is to treat people better, regardless of whether I think I'm never going to interact with them again or not.

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