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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I don't know why, but no one seems to be up for a social first. It's not essential for us, but we've had some great evenings with good company. Just doesn't seem to happen any more.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always insist on a social, no social, no meet  "
If I am meeting alone (mrs) I do too, but when meeting as a couple just don't find it to be the case x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We prefer not to.
Not looking for friendship or idle chat.
It's all about the sex for us although appreciate a social can build up the sexual tension for some or perhaps most.
All down to preference I guess. Can definitely see the pro's. I guess we just would find it awkward.
Daisy x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always insist on a social, lots of guy's seem to think you will jump into bed after a couple of messages on here. I look for repeat meets so it's worth spending some time to see if there is chemistry.
When l go to clubs it's different as unlikely to see them again.x |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"I always insist on a social, no social, no meet
If I am meeting alone (mrs) I do too, but when meeting as a couple just don't find it to be the case x"
I think it does make a difference being a single fem compared to a couple, though some men, do not seem to understand the importance of a first meet from a safety point of view |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We prefer not to.
Not looking for friendship or idle chat.
It's all about the sex for us although appreciate a social can build up the sexual tension for some or perhaps most.
All down to preference I guess. Can definitely see the pro's. I guess we just would find it awkward.
Daisy x"
Ahh I can see for your point of view. We don't insist and happy to just meet to play, just generally enjoy when we do and yes, we've found it does build sexual tension.
MrsE xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We prefer a social first. Just a relaxed atmosphere where there is no pressure to walk away if something doesn't gel for some reason
Kinky  "
Definitely. Doesn't always just work, does it!?
MrsE x |
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We wouldn't even entertain a social only meet .
We've been asked so many times to join a couple for a social only on the initial meet , and refused every time .
If we get on and connect , we play , it seems pointless meeting up and denying the opportunity to have fun |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Always have a social first. As a single woman it makes sense. Never had a problem with men not wanting to x"
No I/we have never had a problem with men not wanting to either, just tends to be couples who aren't as keen.
MrsE x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always insist on a social, lots of guy's seem to think you will jump into bed after a couple of messages on here. I look for repeat meets so it's worth spending some time to see if there is chemistry.
When l go to clubs it's different as unlikely to see them again.x"
Agreed. I do enjoy club meets.
MrsE x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We wouldn't even entertain a social only meet .
We've been asked so many times to join a couple for a social only on the initial meet , and refused every time .
If we get on and connect , we play , it seems pointless meeting up and denying the opportunity to have fun "
Where do you generally meet? And if you didn't connect, at what point would you walk away, if it was straight into play? Not questioning your way at all, really just looking to understand how it would work. We've had socials at a pub, then gone to a club or we went to someone's house once, luckily we all clicked and it was fun.
MrsE x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A social is a must. I wouldn't want to commit to something, not knowing the physical chemistry beforehand, then having that awkwardness of telling them to their face if don't fancy them, not knowing how they'd react. Safety is also an issue for a first meet. I'd rather it be in public. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would normally say no problem on socials, but at the moment several things are getting in the way.
Transport is tough as i have no car and no money and on top of that due to my depression i am no longer comfortable in pubs and bars.
Working on it though, lol.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We wouldn't even entertain a social only meet .
We've been asked so many times to join a couple for a social only on the initial meet , and refused every time .
If we get on and connect , we play , it seems pointless meeting up and denying the opportunity to have fun
Where do you generally meet? And if you didn't connect, at what point would you walk away, if it was straight into play? Not questioning your way at all, really just looking to understand how it would work. We've had socials at a pub, then gone to a club or we went to someone's house once, luckily we all clicked and it was fun.
MrsE x"
Do you tell them that your 'social' would be just the start of the night, with the chance of sex later that night if you all click?
Maybe they think you mean a social then a wait of days or weeks before sex. |
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Going to an organized social where you can meet people and chat is cool and I like that, but going out for a personal social with the hope of maybe a play at the end is not for me , my time is too valuable for that. If you want that ,my response will be , lets meet at a swingers club and do the social there , that's what the clubs are for, if you do that kind of social in an area where you have many clubs available, whats the difference between you and vanilla people who act so immature and cannot be straight to the point.
On the other hand, up north in Scotland we don't have many clubs, so we have to make do with this type of social and this is the only situation where it is acceptable to me cause we don't have many clubs. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We wouldn't even entertain a social only meet .
We've been asked so many times to join a couple for a social only on the initial meet , and refused every time .
If we get on and connect , we play , it seems pointless meeting up and denying the opportunity to have fun
Where do you generally meet? And if you didn't connect, at what point would you walk away, if it was straight into play? Not questioning your way at all, really just looking to understand how it would work. We've had socials at a pub, then gone to a club or we went to someone's house once, luckily we all clicked and it was fun.
MrsE x
Do you tell them that your 'social' would be just the start of the night, with the chance of sex later that night if you all click?
Maybe they think you mean a social then a wait of days or weeks before sex. "
We engage in all sorts of meets. Social only, social leading to more, then play meets. I just find few want a social, most just want to get straight to it xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Going to an organized social where you can meet people and chat is cool and I like that, but going out for a personal social with the hope of maybe a play at the end is not for me , my time is too valuable for that. If you want that ,my response will be , lets meet at a swingers club and do the social there , that's what the clubs are for, if you do that kind of social in an area where you have many clubs available, whats the difference between you and vanilla people who act so immature and cannot be straight to the point.
On the other hand, up north in Scotland we don't have many clubs, so we have to make do with this type of social and this is the only situation where it is acceptable to me cause we don't have many clubs."
Makes sense. We are fortunate enough to have a club on our doorstep. In all honesty though, a club meet is my fave. It's safe, fun and you're not tied to anyone...unless you want to be  xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I love a social and 99% of the time when I post meets they are for a social
I think it goes a good opportunity to chat flirt see if there's a connection and build some anticipation for a future meet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Social with the option to play if all happy that evening are fine, social onlys just boring, cold, calculating and like a job interview....
If we meet a couple and we don't want to all ravish each other that night, then it won't happen in the future, social only are a waste of our time x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We like a social first. If we are all happy about it then we arrange to meet and play at a club. If we met for the social at the club it might be akward if we didnt want to play with them. So far every guy has been fine about this system. If they werent ok about it then we simply dont meet  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We wouldn't even entertain a social only meet .
We've been asked so many times to join a couple for a social only on the initial meet , and refused every time .
If we get on and connect , we play , it seems pointless meeting up and denying the opportunity to have fun
Where do you generally meet? And if you didn't connect, at what point would you walk away, if it was straight into play? Not questioning your way at all, really just looking to understand how it would work. We've had socials at a pub, then gone to a club or we went to someone's house once, luckily we all clicked and it was fun.
MrsE x
Do you tell them that your 'social' would be just the start of the night, with the chance of sex later that night if you all click?
Maybe they think you mean a social then a wait of days or weeks before sex.
We engage in all sorts of meets. Social only, social leading to more, then play meets. I just find few want a social, most just want to get straight to it xx"
If socials are important to you stick with them. |
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By *rwolfMan
over a year ago
bristol |
Socials work great
It goes well, you can build anticipation and if it goes really well you can play after.
It goes bad, you have spent an hour or so and at least you have had a night out knowing nothing ventured nothing gained
Win/Win |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Socials work great
It goes well, you can build anticipation and if it goes really well you can play after.
It goes bad, you have spent an hour or so and at least you have had a night out knowing nothing ventured nothing gained
Win/Win"
Agreed |
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"We wouldn't even entertain a social only meet .
We've been asked so many times to join a couple for a social only on the initial meet , and refused every time .
If we get on and connect , we play , it seems pointless meeting up and denying the opportunity to have fun
Where do you generally meet? And if you didn't connect, at what point would you walk away, if it was straight into play? Not questioning your way at all, really just looking to understand how it would work. We've had socials at a pub, then gone to a club or we went to someone's house once, luckily we all clicked and it was fun.
MrsE x"
We are happy to meet anyone , anywhere with a view to play if we click . Obviously by the time we agree to meet we have exchanged pics and a couple of messages , so we are pretty sure it will work .
We have walked away many times when pics haven't been an accurate reflection , or that their personality is not for us .
As another couple said , a purely social meet is a waste of our time , effort and money spent on sitters . It doesn't mean we want to get straight into play though . We love flirting and the build up to play . We just don't want to spend all night knowing it's going nowhere . |
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Much love op, as I said ,swingers are not vanilla people, swingers want multiple lovers but don't want stress . Most vanilla people want to be swingers but cannot be true themselves, my female swinger friends tell me they would love to have me for themselves only but they know the rules of our lifestyle and they abide by it. So if a female friend of theirs who is a swinger likes me and I like them, me and their female friend can fuck in their presence and they have to accept it. It is a swinging rule. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We wouldn't even entertain a social only meet .
We've been asked so many times to join a couple for a social only on the initial meet , and refused every time .
If we get on and connect , we play , it seems pointless meeting up and denying the opportunity to have fun
Where do you generally meet? And if you didn't connect, at what point would you walk away, if it was straight into play? Not questioning your way at all, really just looking to understand how it would work. We've had socials at a pub, then gone to a club or we went to someone's house once, luckily we all clicked and it was fun.
MrsE x
We are happy to meet anyone , anywhere with a view to play if we click . Obviously by the time we agree to meet we have exchanged pics and a couple of messages , so we are pretty sure it will work .
We have walked away many times when pics haven't been an accurate reflection , or that their personality is not for us .
As another couple said , a purely social meet is a waste of our time , effort and money spent on sitters . It doesn't mean we want to get straight into play though . We love flirting and the build up to play . We just don't want to spend all night knowing it's going nowhere ."
When we have a social meet we usually just have a short social, a drink and a chat about what we like/want. We dont send out face pics so thats why we have a social. We meet to play in a club so we dont want them to have to pay their entrance fee unless we are all happy to play. Plus it could be akward in the club if we didnt want to play with them. |
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