"Dryness and low drive"
Find a sympathetic gp. Ask at her surgery which gp is most experienced in such matters and see him or her.
In the meantime experiment with different lube Sylk is good as it moisturises too but doesn't suit everyone. You can get ones like Replens that come in pessary form and last about three days too.
Where low drive is concerned you need to communicate with her because what works for one woman won't for another but taking the pressure off and giving lots of non sexual affection can help.
Good luck to you both. |
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"Oh and also this might not help but my gp has told me that menopause symptoms such as she is experiencing are helped by having sex as much as possible.
I've never heard this any other tips x"
Not really. My gp is great, very open about stuff like this and easy to talk to. It's about blood flow apparently.
I'm of the opinion that it's a matter of luck, some women will have few symptoms and some will have the lot. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you so much for your help and support. Love to you all, you women do go through it x"
I was lucky...I sailed through it, it didn't even affect my sex drive, and when that went through the roof when it finished ...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you so much for your help and support. Love to you all, you women do go through it x
I was lucky...I sailed through it, it didn't even affect my sex drive, and when that went through the roof when it finished ... "
Oh I do hope my wife's does too. We'll be straight back to chameleons to take full advantage of it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I managed to treat the symptoms of menopause quite successfully with Black Cohosh and Sage Leaf (both available from Holland and Barrett, Amazon etc), but when do libido took a nose dive and showed no sign of recovering, I went to see my GP - it's important to see one who is knowledgeable and supportive. I resisted taking HRT for some time, because I was reluctant to accept the fact that I was going through the menopause, it happened way before I was expecting it (despite being in on late 40s), but I can honestly say that it's the best thing I did. Not only have my symptoms (night sweats, horrendous mood swings, virginal dryness, low sex drive etc) settled down, but sexually I feel like myself again, like I'm in my 20s not my 40s.
The one thing you can do for her, which my awesome hubby did for me, is be supportive, understanding and reassuring. It can be a really difficult stage for a woman to go through and having your support will make all the difference.
Something else to bear in mind, is that you may need to be prepared to put more thought and effort into showing her how much you want her, spend more time on foreplay to help her feel ready. One thing I was concerned about when I experienced dryness, was that my hubby would feel like he wasn't turning me on...ridiculously, I felt like I was letting him down somehow, because I felt like my body was letting me down.
It's a complicated issue, which all women experience differently. Love, understanding and communication definitely make it easier to navigate together.
V x |
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"I managed to treat the symptoms of menopause quite successfully with Black Cohosh and Sage Leaf (both available from Holland and Barrett, Amazon etc), but when do libido took a nose dive and showed no sign of recovering, I went to see my GP - it's important to see one who is knowledgeable and supportive. I resisted taking HRT for some time, because I was reluctant to accept the fact that I was going through the menopause, it happened way before I was expecting it (despite being in on late 40s), but I can honestly say that it's the best thing I did. Not only have my symptoms (night sweats, horrendous mood swings, virginal dryness, low sex drive etc) settled down, but sexually I feel like myself again, like I'm in my 20s not my 40s.
The one thing you can do for her, which my awesome hubby did for me, is be supportive, understanding and reassuring. It can be a really difficult stage for a woman to go through and having your support will make all the difference.
Something else to bear in mind, is that you may need to be prepared to put more thought and effort into showing her how much you want her, spend more time on foreplay to help her feel ready. One thing I was concerned about when I experienced dryness, was that my hubby would feel like he wasn't turning me on...ridiculously, I felt like I was letting him down somehow, because I felt like my body was letting me down.
It's a complicated issue, which all women experience differently. Love, understanding and communication definitely make it easier to navigate together.
V x"
That's a nice post,sound's like you have a great husband. |
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"I managed to treat the symptoms of menopause quite successfully with Black Cohosh and Sage Leaf (both available from Holland and Barrett, Amazon etc), but when do libido took a nose dive and showed no sign of recovering, I went to see my GP - it's important to see one who is knowledgeable and supportive. I resisted taking HRT for some time, because I was reluctant to accept the fact that I was going through the menopause, it happened way before I was expecting it (despite being in on late 40s), but I can honestly say that it's the best thing I did. Not only have my symptoms (night sweats, horrendous mood swings, virginal dryness, low sex drive etc) settled down, but sexually I feel like myself again, like I'm in my 20s not my 40s.
The one thing you can do for her, which my awesome hubby did for me, is be supportive, understanding and reassuring. It can be a really difficult stage for a woman to go through and having your support will make all the difference.
Something else to bear in mind, is that you may need to be prepared to put more thought and effort into showing her how much you want her, spend more time on foreplay to help her feel ready. One thing I was concerned about when I experienced dryness, was that my hubby would feel like he wasn't turning me on...ridiculously, I felt like I was letting him down somehow, because I felt like my body was letting me down.
It's a complicated issue, which all women experience differently. Love, understanding and communication definitely make it easier to navigate together.
V x
That's a nice post,sound's like you have a great husband."
I agree it sums it up very well and shows the importance of communication and understanding. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I managed to treat the symptoms of menopause quite successfully with Black Cohosh and Sage Leaf (both available from Holland and Barrett, Amazon etc), but when do libido took a nose dive and showed no sign of recovering, I went to see my GP - it's important to see one who is knowledgeable and supportive. I resisted taking HRT for some time, because I was reluctant to accept the fact that I was going through the menopause, it happened way before I was expecting it (despite being in on late 40s), but I can honestly say that it's the best thing I did. Not only have my symptoms (night sweats, horrendous mood swings, virginal dryness, low sex drive etc) settled down, but sexually I feel like myself again, like I'm in my 20s not my 40s.
The one thing you can do for her, which my awesome hubby did for me, is be supportive, understanding and reassuring. It can be a really difficult stage for a woman to go through and having your support will make all the difference.
Something else to bear in mind, is that you may need to be prepared to put more thought and effort into showing her how much you want her, spend more time on foreplay to help her feel ready. One thing I was concerned about when I experienced dryness, was that my hubby would feel like he wasn't turning me on...ridiculously, I felt like I was letting him down somehow, because I felt like my body was letting me down.
It's a complicated issue, which all women experience differently. Love, understanding and communication definitely make it easier to navigate together.
V x"
I experienced some same symptons as you. My main problem was the hot flushes and night sweats. I tried various remedies but all were a big waste of money.
My doc was great and had no quarms about prescribing me HRT.
Its completely changed my life. I only have a few hot flushes now. Im pleased that taking HRT helps prevent problems with my bones
I feel so much happier with life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thank you ladies!
Menopause seems to be one of those subjects that women don't talk about openly, which is such a shame. It gives the impression that it's something to dear and hide. I think the nature of this website means it attracts more open minded women, and I for one am thankful for the opportunity to talk so openly about subjects that a lot of women won't even acknowledge.
V x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As I said previously I sailed through mine, and it started very early ..
The peri menopause started a year after I had my son so I was 40..
However, unbeknown to me, I was also presenting symptoms of hypothyroidism which was later diagnosed, so perhaps those symptoms over rode the menopause ones....
My sex drive never took a dive, far from it in fact, and the hot flushes were manageable ...
Now I'm 51 I consider myself lucky that I went through it without too much hassle as I know everyone is different and some can be a lot worse than others |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you ladies!
Menopause seems to be one of those subjects that women don't talk about openly, which is such a shame. It gives the impression that it's something to dear and hide."
*something to fear |
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"I managed to treat the symptoms of menopause quite successfully with Black Cohosh and Sage Leaf (both available from Holland and Barrett, Amazon etc), but when do libido took a nose dive and showed no sign of recovering, I went to see my GP - it's important to see one who is knowledgeable and supportive. I resisted taking HRT for some time, because I was reluctant to accept the fact that I was going through the menopause, it happened way before I was expecting it (despite being in on late 40s), but I can honestly say that it's the best thing I did. Not only have my symptoms (night sweats, horrendous mood swings, virginal dryness, low sex drive etc) settled down, but sexually I feel like myself again, like I'm in my 20s not my 40s.
The one thing you can do for her, which my awesome hubby did for me, is be supportive, understanding and reassuring. It can be a really difficult stage for a woman to go through and having your support will make all the difference.
Something else to bear in mind, is that you may need to be prepared to put more thought and effort into showing her how much you want her, spend more time on foreplay to help her feel ready. One thing I was concerned about when I experienced dryness, was that my hubby would feel like he wasn't turning me on...ridiculously, I felt like I was letting him down somehow, because I felt like my body was letting me down.
It's a complicated issue, which all women experience differently. Love, understanding and communication definitely make it easier to navigate together.
V x
I experienced some same symptons as you. My main problem was the hot flushes and night sweats. I tried various remedies but all were a big waste of money.
My doc was great and had no quarms about prescribing me HRT.
Its completely changed my life. I only have a few hot flushes now. Im pleased that taking HRT helps prevent problems with my bones
I feel so much happier with life."
.
This is me too.
Sometimes suffered horrendous flushes when I was out. Particularly remember sweat running down the backs of my knees at my 50th celebrations!! Not attractive. And the worst aspect of night flushing is the sleep deprivation. That’s what ultimately led me to HRT.
It can take a while to work things out but you have to do what’s right for you xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i went thru the menopause without really knowing as i had no real body feedbacks apart from my monthly stopped ..it took my dr to tell me i been thru it and i only went to the doc because my periods stopped (was 42yrs) ...its something that alot of women know very little about ie how it may affect you its so different for each and every woman i had it easy and i really feel for those that dont. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Isn’t there a link to breast cancer with HRT?
"
Recent studies have shown that you are more at risk from other environmental factors, than you are from HRT, and using HRT can actually help protect you from osteoporosis, which is more of a risk than breast cancer as women get older.
Men are also generally safer when their significant others are using HRT. 
V x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I managed to treat the symptoms of menopause quite successfully with Black Cohosh and Sage Leaf (both available from Holland and Barrett, Amazon etc), but when do libido took a nose dive and showed no sign of recovering, I went to see my GP - it's important to see one who is knowledgeable and supportive. I resisted taking HRT for some time, because I was reluctant to accept the fact that I was going through the menopause, it happened way before I was expecting it (despite being in on late 40s), but I can honestly say that it's the best thing I did. Not only have my symptoms (night sweats, horrendous mood swings, virginal dryness, low sex drive etc) settled down, but sexually I feel like myself again, like I'm in my 20s not my 40s.
The one thing you can do for her, which my awesome hubby did for me, is be supportive, understanding and reassuring. It can be a really difficult stage for a woman to go through and having your support will make all the difference.
Something else to bear in mind, is that you may need to be prepared to put more thought and effort into showing her how much you want her, spend more time on foreplay to help her feel ready. One thing I was concerned about when I experienced dryness, was that my hubby would feel like he wasn't turning me on...ridiculously, I felt like I was letting him down somehow, because I felt like my body was letting me down.
It's a complicated issue, which all women experience differently. Love, understanding and communication definitely make it easier to navigate together.
V x
I experienced some same symptons as you. My main problem was the hot flushes and night sweats. I tried various remedies but all were a big waste of money.
My doc was great and had no quarms about prescribing me HRT.
Its completely changed my life. I only have a few hot flushes now. Im pleased that taking HRT helps prevent problems with my bones
I feel so much happier with life..
This is me too.
Sometimes suffered horrendous flushes when I was out. Particularly remember sweat running down the backs of my knees at my 50th celebrations!! Not attractive. And the worst aspect of night flushing is the sleep deprivation. That’s what ultimately led me to HRT.
It can take a while to work things out but you have to do what’s right for you xx"
 |
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