FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > At times i just dont get Swinging !

At times i just dont get Swinging !

By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

Well after a few years on here it still amazes me . Having a browse through couples profiles and it just amazes me that a Gent would really want to share his Mrs with another guy . Ok its fantastic for likes of single guys like me ...but NO WAY if my Mrs turns heads and is constantly asked out would i ever share her with another guy . Couple Swinging maybe , but still watching my Hot Mrs being fucked would probably mess with my head.

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

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By *pa and dCouple over a year ago

Barnet

Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?"

Maybe .. but if shes stunning i dont think i could share . Although after a few years on here it maybe wouldnt affect me like it would before i joined where jealousy would of kicked in .

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By *ikstupp2Man over a year ago

london

"Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?"
i totally get that but it's not for all, I would join a couple but wouldn't like a guy joining me n my mrs, seems shallow but I think it's how most guys think

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

Totally agree with that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me.

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me. "

Im only debating this subject tbh . Im open to sharing my woman but i just dont think i could if she was hot stunning n we was in love . Thats all im saying . Thinking a relationship based on us two having the best sex lives but little else is where i think id be at ease swinging with her . I had a v.hot brazilian fck buddy keen to swing but for one reason or another we never managed to meet a few couples we wanted to . So bit of a missed opportunity tbh

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

Because we like kinkier sex than normal couples, so to satisfy that we sometimes like to invite others to join us.

There's no jealousy, just pure filthy unadulterated lust and pleasure. Our meets then go home and we have the love and sanctity of our own relationship and happy memories to enjoy after.

I know some couples think men who can't do the same are hypocrites. I don't. I just think we all like what we like.

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By *emini ManMan over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

To be honest I think we all find our own way, there's no right or wrong, no black and white.

You just go with what you are BOTH (if a couple) comfortable with, whilst being open and honest enough to be able to talk about it, and make changes if it's not working.

It's also not a case of "sharing" my partner, either, I don't own her. We choose to play with others together (and separately) of our own volition knowing that the other partner is supportive and agrees with what we're doing.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me. "

It's my definition too. I wouldn't even entertain the idea of meeting anyone alone until I was sure I'd be happy for my fiancé to do the same because of that hypocrisy.

I won't do what I wouldn't be comfortable allowing my partner to do.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well after a few years on here it still amazes me . Having a browse through couples profiles and it just amazes me that a Gent would really want to share his Mrs with another guy . Ok its fantastic for likes of single guys like me ...but NO WAY if my Mrs turns heads and is constantly asked out would i ever share her with another guy . Couple Swinging maybe , but still watching my Hot Mrs being fucked would probably mess with my head.

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

Wow. Lol

We are very much in love and don't 'need' swinging due to our relationship failing or to keep us together. We do it because of the kick we both get from it. Like that buzz you get when you are single and dating but you get to share that buzz in the security of a loving relationship

It just works for us and we respect that it won't be for everyone. To generalise tho that people only do it because something is lacking in their relationship is quite a limited way of thinking. We both came into our relationship with the knowledge that swinging would play a part in our lives as and when we both agree.

Xxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

For us it's different as in tray has no interest in other guys only other women but she likes me meeting other women or seeing me with other women it really turns her on and it took meat 12 months for her to persuade me to do this most guys would have been arranging a meet before she'd even finished the sentence but seeing her reaction after the first time I truly know it turns her on as for her with other guys she will soft swap with other couples which we've done but she has desire to be penetrated by someone else so I can't really comment on how I would feel if she chose to do that as it hasn't ever been an issue

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

"You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me. "

Why ?

We like fucking with bi people, but not really straight people. Play between us, is obviously heterosexual. Are we hypocrites ?

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

Wow. Lol

Xxx"

Well tbh i got told that it keeps relationships going when i chatted with a couple at a club few months back ..in fact they was the owners of the club ! As a single guy i would expect probably 90% not to swing with there partners if they meet someone whos never swung ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me.

Why ?

We like fucking with bi people, but not really straight people. Play between us, is obviously heterosexual. Are we hypocrites ?"

No not in my opinion.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

For my husband it turns him on so much seeing me with another guy. Much more than him going with a woman. He loves me very much and it's the fact that he finds me so sexy that it turns him on. He said its like watching your favourite porn actress live but also knowing she is loving it and being able to see it from all different angles. Everyone has personal preferences. But if we are all consenting adults and all enjoying it, what's the harm.

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By *londieddWoman over a year ago

fife

"Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?

Maybe .. but if shes stunning i dont think i could share . Although after a few years on here it maybe wouldnt affect me like it would before i joined where jealousy would of kicked in ."

and if she's not "stunning"?

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx"

Yea i get that aswel . Think more im on this site the more likely that will happen to me ? Tried the dating think and everytime it comes in my head i wonder if she would swing n act out a few fantasies ect . I was in a 10yr relationship before . Very much in love n very very vanilla but was ok with it . Now older i get with two young kids i dont see me commiting properly . If i ever did fall in love again i wonder what would come of it ?? ...there are some absolute stunners on fabs . So it always gets my mind ticking over in overdrive of why they swing ect ect ect

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I know that a few single guys we have been with would never share their own partners if in a relationship. But have been very honest about that fact, they wouldn't.

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By *londieddWoman over a year ago

fife

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx

do you think swinging is for unattractive people?

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"I know that a few single guys we have been with would never share their own partners if in a relationship. But have been very honest about that fact, they wouldn't. "

I know a couple that swinging has made them more in love . They was a regular couple i met . She was stunning !! They got engaged only few months ago actually

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Some people are naturally monogamous and some aren't, if you have a jealous streak you are probably the former rather than the latter.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx

Why do we swing?

We have been in a committed relationship for 19 years and for us this is adding some fun and fantasy to our relationship.

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx

do you think swinging is for unattractive people?"

Haha .. well no not really but im sure you going to grill me over my opinions ??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me. "

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By *ertsguy2000Man over a year ago

hertford

"For my husband it turns him on so much seeing me with another guy. Much more than him going with a woman. He loves me very much and it's the fact that he finds me so sexy that it turns him on. He said its like watching your favourite porn actress live but also knowing she is loving it and being able to see it from all different angles. Everyone has personal preferences. But if we are all consenting adults and all enjoying it, what's the harm. "

Sounds perfect, both of you trusting in each other and both getting the thrill and the joy that is important to you both

I think many couples swap together or just one and that's their choice, who are we to judge if they are harming no one

OP you mention several times that you would have a problem if she was 'stunning', so if she wasn't 'stunning' then that would be ok??

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx"

Same here

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By *he horny kinkstersCouple over a year ago

North West

So OP, you could share your wife so long as she wasn't stunningly attractive?

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx

Why do we swing?

We have been in a committed relationship for 19 years and for us this is adding some fun and fantasy to our relationship. "

See TNS2016 i just couldnt share Mrs ..stunning !! With another lady yes coz im selfish lol but watching a guy fuck her maybe not but like you say 19years things develop in your lives together .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This

Same scenario for us

Xxx

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By *obbytupperMan over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

The best fabicide thread of the day.

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

"So OP, you could share your wife so long as she wasn't stunningly attractive?

That's what he said. If she's a double bagger, she's good to share

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By *b coupleCouple over a year ago

southampton

If we knew that's how you felt we wouldn't invite you to play with us.

Seems a bit of a piss take in our opinion

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I personally would never share my other half regardless of how "hot" they are!

It would break my heart and I would consider it cheating.

I also don't understand this as I wouldn't want to share or be shared!

However I use this site purely to find single men! I wouldn't be happy playing with a man in a relationship! Yes I'm not a swinger and I get that but it's a good site for fun!

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

Ok ..check out.. happy_place.. looking at her just made me think thats all im saying . Why would you want another guy fuck her as shes everything a man could dream of . Not having a dig at unactractive or married couples ect . Im just so curious to get into swingers minds of why they swing . So please lets not go off track n say im this or that ect

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Mr here.

Perhaps I can answer your question OP. I'll start by saying Mrs SKC is often described as the hottest female in the club by people we meet.

I'm secure enough to share her with guys who are on our level (which is about 20%) because she enjoys it and so do I. And when couples are involved, we get girl-girl action as well which is also high on our list.

I suppose I'm a little spoiled, because all the girls/women I've had relationships with are all super slim and attractive. Perhaps a guy who doesn't have so much luck with women (or only finds one) would feel differently.

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"The best fabicide thread of the day.

Bobby you seem to be having an extreme amount of fun . Fairplay mate

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx

Why do we swing?

We have been in a committed relationship for 19 years and for us this is adding some fun and fantasy to our relationship.

See TNS2016 i just couldnt share Mrs ..stunning !! With another lady yes coz im selfish lol but watching a guy fuck her maybe not but like you say 19years things develop in your lives together ."

Plus I might get out of my tracksuit bottoms, brush my hair and stick on some sexy underwear and forgot to mention shave my legs!! If there was ever a incentive to share your wife that's one.

Plus he would say if you have something good. Why keep it to yourself, sharing is caring

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx

Why do we swing?

We have been in a committed relationship for 19 years and for us this is adding some fun and fantasy to our relationship.

See TNS2016 i just couldnt share Mrs ..stunning !! With another lady yes coz im selfish lol but watching a guy fuck her maybe not but like you say 19years things develop in your lives together .

Plus I might get out of my tracksuit bottoms, brush my hair and stick on some sexy underwear and forgot to mention shave my legs!! If there was ever a incentive to share your wife that's one.

Plus he would say if you have something good. Why keep it to yourself, sharing is caring

Haha ...love that reply . 19yrs i suppose a bit of spice is need eh lol xxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx

Why do we swing?

We have been in a committed relationship for 19 years and for us this is adding some fun and fantasy to our relationship.

See TNS2016 i just couldnt share Mrs ..stunning !! With another lady yes coz im selfish lol but watching a guy fuck her maybe not but like you say 19years things develop in your lives together .

Plus I might get out of my tracksuit bottoms, brush my hair and stick on some sexy underwear and forgot to mention shave my legs!! If there was ever a incentive to share your wife that's one.

Plus he would say if you have something good. Why keep it to yourself, sharing is caring

Haha ...love that reply . 19yrs i suppose a bit of spice is need eh lol xxx"

Oh yes but the best sex we have is when we get home from a club. So it's not a replacement it's a enhancement.

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By *ertsguy2000Man over a year ago

hertford

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx

Why do we swing?

We have been in a committed relationship for 19 years and for us this is adding some fun and fantasy to our relationship.

See TNS2016 i just couldnt share Mrs ..stunning !! With another lady yes coz im selfish lol but watching a guy fuck her maybe not but like you say 19years things develop in your lives together .

Plus I might get out of my tracksuit bottoms, brush my hair and stick on some sexy underwear and forgot to mention shave my legs!! If there was ever a incentive to share your wife that's one.

Plus he would say if you have something good. Why keep it to yourself, sharing is caring

I think for many people, seeing someone you love trust and adore in a heightened state of pleasure is very arousing, and knowing at the end of the night they are coming home to you and no one else, also being in a trusting relationship where if either of you say 'we stop' then you do, it's something many find a wonderful thing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe for some people who are in a long term relationship but there are others who enter into relationships with the knowledge that this will be part of their lives

Like us xxx

Why do we swing?

We have been in a committed relationship for 19 years and for us this is adding some fun and fantasy to our relationship.

See TNS2016 i just couldnt share Mrs ..stunning !! With another lady yes coz im selfish lol but watching a guy fuck her maybe not but like you say 19years things develop in your lives together .

Plus I might get out of my tracksuit bottoms, brush my hair and stick on some sexy underwear and forgot to mention shave my legs!! If there was ever a incentive to share your wife that's one.

Plus he would say if you have something good. Why keep it to yourself, sharing is caring

Perfectly put

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By *oi_LucyCouple over a year ago

Barbados

This is pretty much the same with us. I love watching my wife have fun with other guys. At the end of the day (or next morning, after breakfast!), she comes home to me.

The way we describe it is you can have steak every day of your life but sometimes you really want a burger

No-one is every 'better' than your partner. They know you and you know them inside and out... no-one can compete with that. But sometimes you want something different. Variety is the spice of life after all.

Or as someone else described on here very well: Knowing her husband is having fun with another woman, is like her knowing he is having a good meal out. She can cook a fantastic meal, and just because he likes a meal in a restaurant or cooked by someone else doesn't mean he doesn't like her cooking or that she is not a fantastic cook and can cook his favourite dish.

And the OP, saying about couldn't share if his misses was 'stunning'... well 'stunning' to whom? You might think she is stunning, and I might not be as turned on by her as you. And vice versa. People all like different things. My wife and I have very different taste in women for example. So there are fems that I play with that she has no interest in. Similarly there are guys she plays with who I like to be involved with in a MMF as the dynamic works well... there are others that I'm (to be honest) not bothered with and perfectly happy for her to play with on her own.

-Matt

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By *urpurseCouple over a year ago

North West

I (Male) love seeing my wife enjoying herself with other men. Nothing beats it for me. I've always fantasised about it with my previous partners. One of them was visually stunning, but not very dirty. It didn't last long

In my experience, the prettier they are, the more its about "them". Obviously, there will be exceptions to this.

Another thing is that I get the best out of seeing my wife getting fucked when I am madly in love with her. If we have fallen out for some reason, then I don't think about it.

The fantasy has been there ever since my first serious girlfriend at College. I don't think its something that you can learn to enjoy. Its probably more to do with being happy that your partner is enjoying themselves.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Been on and off here as a couple, single, fb couple and now regular couple again.

In all that time I/we have only ever come across 2 single men that my partner has ever felt comfortable with to play with outside of group/party fun and clubs.

Because they appreciate her as a woman and I love the way they appreciate her as a woman.

Too many couples out there who's fem won't play but her husband /Bf expects a right to play with us, is my partner beautiful?? To me yes she is, to some others she is, to others still she is a play thing.

These are the people we choose to avoid as we are here to meet others who have appreciation and respect for what we all do within this amazing lifestyle.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I (Male) love seeing my wife enjoying herself with other men. Nothing beats it for me. I've always fantasised about it with my previous partners. One of them was visually stunning, but not very dirty. It didn't last long

In my experience, the prettier they are, the more its about "them". Obviously, there will be exceptions to this.

Another thing is that I get the best out of seeing my wife getting fucked when I am madly in love with her. If we have fallen out for some reason, then I don't think about it.

Completely agree. It's been a fantasy for Mr T for a long time. He had tried to get me to have threesome with his friends ever since we have have been together, but it just didn't feel right until we went to a club with people we didn't know in real life.

S x

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By *ruity2sumCouple over a year ago

york

Swinging is not obviously for you .. it's all about trust ,

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

I think a lot of this is about the attitude you, as a man, have to women. If you view your partner as an independent human being with her own needs and desires, you will be happy for her to fulfil them. If, on the other hand, you see her as somehow "yours" who needs permission from you to fulfill her needs and desires you probably won't let her.

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By *aveandSue1Couple over a year ago

Doncaster

We've been swinging for years and have a very loving marriage.

Why do we swop, or, as now, why does Sue enjoy going with other men and why do I enjoy watching her?

I think you have to accept the basic premise that we're all different. One mans meat etc etc.

I enjoy men looking at and wanting her. What husband wouldn't and her going with other men is an extention of this.

I like to see her having fun albeit in a pretty way out way by 'normal' standards. She knows I get turned on by watching her so this enhances her pleasure as well.

For a guy to have sex with someone elses wife and not want his wife to go with someone else is hypocritical in my view and has an element of jealousy about it, something that has no place in swinging circles.

The op says that he wouldn't want his wife to go with other men if she were a stunner.

Mmmmm don't think this sexist comment will go down very well with the ladies. Can't say I agree with that at all.

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By *LCCCouple over a year ago

Cambridge

"Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?

Maybe .. but if shes stunning i dont think i could share . Although after a few years on here it maybe wouldnt affect me like it would before i joined where jealousy would of kicked in ."

But if your Mrs was a right munter then you wouldn't mind sharing?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

OP, I could go into a lot of detail about our reasons, but you're use of the word 'sharing' makes me think I'd be wasting my time.

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

[Removed by poster at 04/04/17 13:23:52]

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"OP, I could go into a lot of detail about our reasons, but you're use of the word 'sharing' makes me think I'd be wasting my time. "

terminology used regular on fabs by couples ... dont shoot the messenger

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By *urpurseCouple over a year ago

North West

S x"

Definitely no guys that either of us know outside of the swinging world. We see meeting guys as getting a sex toy out of a cupboard. Once finished, you put it back, and only open it again when you want another meet. Sounds a bit insulting to guys, but they don't seem to mind

Made some great swinging male friends along the way

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me. "
Why is it hypocritical? The OP is saying he could not do it . He is not saying it's wrong he is saying it's not something he could do

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By *issVeryWoman over a year ago

streatham

I think the OP doesn't get swinging because he is not one- best to back to the thread "are singles on here Swingers"

You are clearly a highly sexed adventurous guy looking for casual fun and experiences. If you don't feel the same way once you are wth a partner and you don't think "yay more variations on the fun to be had" then clearly you never was a swinger, you just play with them- that's cool.

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By *ikstupp2Man over a year ago

london

"You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me. "
i don't swing when I'm in a non swinging relationship is all

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

Ok guys think its time to end this thread . Knew as soon as i debated it i get a few haters who will take this o0ff track . Well thanks all for your comments. Happy fabbing x

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By *lik and PaulCouple over a year ago

Flagrante

"You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me.

So ok to share a munter but not a stunner??!...is this on the basis that you would feel you are getting the better end of the deal?

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me.

So ok to share a munter but not a stunner??!...is this on the basis that you would feel you are getting the better end of the deal?"

Yaaawn

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By *lik and PaulCouple over a year ago

Flagrante

....we avoid guys that think like this.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Before I'd let my other half I'd never been involved in swinging. He suggested it and I said yes let's try .

He loves watching me with another guy yet has no interest in playing with other women. He just gets off on seeing another guy turned on by me and I get lots and lots of hot sex !

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have noticed that you dont see many profiles with the woman want to see hubby having fun as much as you see the hubby want to watch the woman, is it cos the woman get more jealous?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What if you met a girl from here, feelings developed and you ended up in a relationship but she made it clear she wanted to keep swinging?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have noticed that you dont see many profiles with the woman want to see hubby having fun as much as you see the hubby want to watch the woman, is it cos the woman get more jealous?"

I've offered to do a couple meet with him so he can play with another woman - he said no thanks , wouldn't do anything for me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have noticed that you dont see many profiles with the woman want to see hubby having fun as much as you see the hubby want to watch the woman, is it cos the woman get more jealous?"

Maybe, maybe not, could be all sorts of reasons.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Ok guys think its time to end this thread . Knew as soon as i debated it i get a few haters who will take this o0ff track . Well thanks all for your comments. Happy fabbing x"

Probably wise.

Plus I'm not entirely sure this is the site for you if these are the beliefs you hold.

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By *LCCCouple over a year ago

Cambridge

"I think the OP doesn't get swinging because he is not one- best to back to the thread "are singles on here Swingers"

Exactly, but couples usually get shot down if they say that someone's not a swinger.

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By *liceandandyCouple over a year ago

Brighton

Trying to not get offended by the OP but... sometimes... *shakes fist to sky* ...

;o)

Alice and I actually met on another website (killing kittens) over four years ago. We got married last September.

We are blissfully-pig-in-shit happy.

We swing when we want (probably about once a month maybe - either a party or private meet) with people we choose carefully (couples, single girls and yes, sometimes, shock horror, single guys)

I am very very biased (obviously and this is Andy speaking) but if you can find a sexier, more beautiful girl on this website than my wife, then good luck, we'd love to meet her!

I utterly ADORE sharing her and seeing her with another guy or girl. I cannot see a problem with sharing her and it kind of feels selfish to not!

She feels the same when watching me fuck another girl. There's a sense of pride almost and afterwards we are so tender and appreciative and loving towards each other.

It completely adds a cherry on top of an already incredible sex life.

Jealousy has no part in swinging. It's not about 'owning' someone or being 'owned'.

If you want to enjoy it and feel liberated it's not anyway.

It's these sort of attitudes that ruin it.

And also, sorry to be harsh and maybe wrong but seems like you haven't much respect for the couples/single girls you're meeting off here and that you're just trying to 'get your end away'.

Maybe we're wrong, but people need to open their minds about relationships as a whole.

It's 2017 for fucks sake.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have noticed that you dont see many profiles with the woman want to see hubby having fun as much as you see the hubby want to watch the woman, is it cos the woman get more jealous?

I've offered to do a couple meet with him so he can play with another woman - he said no thanks , wouldn't do anything for me "
I see yes, yeah it depends on the couple too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have noticed that you dont see many profiles with the woman want to see hubby having fun as much as you see the hubby want to watch the woman, is it cos the woman get more jealous?

Maybe, maybe not, could be all sorts of reasons. "
That is right too

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By *liceandandyCouple over a year ago

Brighton

This.

"What if you met a girl from here, feelings developed and you ended up in a relationship but she made it clear she wanted to keep swinging? "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Trying to not get offended by the OP but... sometimes... *shakes fist to sky* ...

;o)

Alice and I actually met on another website (killing kittens) over four years ago. We got married last September.

We are blissfully-pig-in-shit happy.

We swing when we want (probably about once a month maybe - either a party or private meet) with people we choose carefully (couples, single girls and yes, sometimes, shock horror, single guys)

I am very very biased (obviously and this is Andy speaking) but if you can find a sexier, more beautiful girl on this website than my wife, then good luck, we'd love to meet her!

I utterly ADORE sharing her and seeing her with another guy or girl. I cannot see a problem with sharing her and it kind of feels selfish to not!

She feels the same when watching me fuck another girl. There's a sense of pride almost and afterwards we are so tender and appreciative and loving towards each other.

It completely adds a cherry on top of an already incredible sex life.

Jealousy has no part in swinging. It's not about 'owning' someone or being 'owned'.

If you want to enjoy it and feel liberated it's not anyway.

It's these sort of attitudes that ruin it.

And also, sorry to be harsh and maybe wrong but seems like you haven't much respect for the couples/single girls you're meeting off here and that you're just trying to 'get your end away'.

Maybe we're wrong, but people need to open their minds about relationships as a whole.

It's 2017 for fucks sake."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Jesus! OP really! My oh my you have some funny ideas

We swing because.....

I can have fun with a girl (H)

I can have fun with 2 girls (S)

Etc etc etc

It's just fun, we love each other, there is no jealousy and your attitude is part of the reason we avoid single guys....

Swinging is just fun for us....

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By *liceandandyCouple over a year ago

Brighton

Agreed.

Feeling a bit guilty as he clearly didn't mean to offend, but needs to change his attitude!

And yep... sadly this sort of view towards 'this thing of ours' is spoiling it for other single guys who are a bit more open-minded.

"Jesus! OP really! My oh my you have some funny ideas

We swing because.....

I can have fun with a girl (H)

I can have fun with 2 girls (S)

Etc etc etc

It's just fun, we love each other, there is no jealousy and your attitude is part of the reason we avoid single guys....

Swinging is just fun for us...."

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By *hrisANtifCouple over a year ago

Napoli, Italy

Another one of these threads!

What OP (and probably many other singles on here) doesn't understand, is that guys who swing with their partners are just a lot more secure than he is.

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

Isn't the bottom line that sexual monogamy suits some people but not others. The op appears to have difficulty in appreciating that no everyone is as possessive of their partners as he clearly is.

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By *unandbuckCouple over a year ago

Sheffield

OP your thread has too many words in the title, it should be 'I just don't get swinging' .

There so much misunderstanding in your post, and you say you've been around swinging for a few years, explaining would be pointless.

MrB

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple over a year ago

Halifax

Op I bet you would happily meet said wives...

Double standard on here again

Miss

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

Keep it going guys your doing well

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"You've gotta be a bit of a hypocrite to accept to shag someone's wife but not willing to share your own.

This is the definition of swinging to me.

Im only debating this subject tbh . Im open to sharing my woman but i just dont think i could if she was hot stunning n we was in love . Thats all im saying .

Does that mean if she was a munter you would?

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Swinging is not for everyone, you have obviously decided it isn't for you. People explaining why they swing would probably make no difference to your decision not to swing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Isn't the bottom line that sexual monogamy suits some people but not others. The op appears to have difficulty in appreciating that no everyone is as possessive of their partners as he clearly is. "

nope...but he expects to be able to fuck them...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Swinging is a win win game. After all, which is better... a partner who lets you explore your sexuality and have sex with others or a partner who doesn't let you explore your sexuality and wants to own, control, and limit you? It's a pretty clear cut choice.

Once you realise this the penny quickly drops that the reverse is also true i.e that you'd be a better person if you also let your partner explore his/her sexuality, that you didn't try to control and limit him/her, and you did it hand in hand as a lifestyle choice, committing to living a broader, more expansive life together. As you see, swinging is just win win

Of course, if you don't want to swing and neither does your partner, being monogamous can be a win win too. So swinging isn't for everyone

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Isn't the bottom line that sexual monogamy suits some people but not others."

This sums it up for me. Marc and I enjoy seeing eachother having sex with other people. We also enjoy group sex. He knows he has nothing to worry about when it comes to how we feel about eachother emotionally, just as I know it.

Clearly if someone wasn't into sex with others or had a problem seeing their partner with someone else then swinging wouldn't be appropriate for them. Different people want different things. That's about it, really.

It used to bug me a little that people who don't "get it" automatically jump to the assumption that there must be something wrong with a swinging couple's relationship (which is sometimes true as well), by its such a common misconception that I'm rather used to it now.

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By *oodnitegirlWoman over a year ago

Yorkshire

Its sharing. Not swapping.

What you really need to remember is who shes going home with. Xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have noticed that you dont see many profiles with the woman want to see hubby having fun as much as you see the hubby want to watch the woman, is it cos the woman get more jealous?"

Not at all. I am happy for him to play and we are trying to connect more with couples so this happens. But what he loves most it's watching me. I can't wait for the day I get to watch him

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By *hor ThumbMan over a year ago

bristol

"Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?i totally get that but it's not for all, I would join a couple but wouldn't like a guy me n my mrs, seems shallow but I think it's how most guys think"
please don't speak for "most males as a) it's not true! B) some of us are secure enough in ourselves and our relationships to be able to do this without jelousy and c) well there isn't a "c" but it doesn't need one. I don't think this site or this lifestyle is for you.

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By *urchoicenowCouple over a year ago

Ashford

Bet you're glad you started this lol

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By *hor ThumbMan over a year ago

bristol

haha. This is us

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?i totally get that but it's not for all, I would join a couple but wouldn't like a guy me n my mrs, seems shallow but I think it's how most guys think please don't speak for "most males as a) it's not true! B) some of us are secure enough in ourselves and our relationships to be able to do this without jelousy and c) well there isn't a "c" but it doesn't need one. I don't think this site or this lifestyle is for you. "

Oh dear ..still early on here aswel . Roll on this evening

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"Bet you're glad you started this lol"

Believe me iv reported it a million times to remove thread so thinking the Mod is having a real giggle st the mo lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?i totally get that but it's not for all, I would join a couple but wouldn't like a guy me n my mrs, seems shallow but I think it's how most guys think please don't speak for "most males as a) it's not true! B) some of us are secure enough in ourselves and our relationships to be able to do this without jelousy and c) well there isn't a "c" but it doesn't need one. I don't think this site or this lifestyle is for you.

Oh dear ..still early on here aswel . Roll on this evening

You better run for cover!!!

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By *arry247Couple over a year ago

Wakefield

We swing because we both enjoy swinging and have done for the last 35 years.

Garry enjoys seeing me being fucked by other men and I enjoy Garry fucking other women.

We are a married couple and as such are one, it may seem like an old fashioned concept but that is why it works for us.

That means that each gets a thrill and enjoyment from seeing or knowing the other getting enjoyment, there is no jealousy because we are both totally committed to the other.

To us it is no different than using different positions in bed missionary, doggy, cowgirl etc., etc. We don’t have sex with each other the same way each time we chop and change, we may have sex in bed or on the sofa or outside.

There are no rules just where or how we want at that particular moment.

Some couples swing to keep their marriage together, this works in the short term but not in the long term. Others swing to spice up their marriage, but soon find that the thrill of doing something ‘forbidden’ soon dies and meets no longer hold a thrill to them.

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

"Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?i totally get that but it's not for all, I would join a couple but wouldn't like a guy me n my mrs, seems shallow but I think it's how most guys think please don't speak for "most males as a) it's not true! B) some of us are secure enough in ourselves and our relationships to be able to do this without jelousy and c) well there isn't a "c" but it doesn't need one. I don't think this site or this lifestyle is for you.

Oh dear ..still early on here aswel . Roll on this evening

You better run for cover!!! "

Iv hid !!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

maybe stay for a while. Remember tomorrow everyone would have forgotten.

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

maybe stay for a while. Remember tomorrow everyone would have forgotten. "

No way this thread is going on for weeks ..hahaha

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"Bet you're glad you started this lol

Believe me iv reported it a million times to remove thread so thinking the Mod is having a real giggle st the mo lol"

Mods shouldn't really remove threads unless they are causing a problem, this isn't causing a problem

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By *LCCCouple over a year ago

Cambridge

"Bet you're glad you started this lol

Believe me iv reported it a million times to remove thread so thinking the Mod is having a real giggle st the mo lol

Don't ask questions to which you're not able to handle the answers.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?

Maybe .. but if shes stunning i dont think i could share . Although after a few years on here it maybe wouldnt affect me like it would before i joined where jealousy would of kicked in ."

I realise that there are another 97 replies after this and i haven't read the rest of the thread but given that you seem to view potential partners as a possession while also giving them a value based on what you perceive as their hotness, I reckon this thread possibly hasn't gone too well?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Great thread, some interesting reading

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wow OP, sorry you got roasted by so many uptight people! You only asked a question!!

Lots of good replies that explain how it works for them, I think it's a great thread. Educational and interesting.

Lots of couples only have threesomes and won't ever have foursomes so just ignore the people that have bitched at you for not wanting to share your partner- you're not alone. It's not for everyone and it doesn't make you an evil monster!

I didn't ever understand it either but I do now. -But I don't think I'd swing with a future partner, same as you. Haters gonna hate....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

When I was in a couple, neither of us was ever jealous of the other having sex with someone else. There was nothing hotter and in a way more loving than having eye contact with each other during group sex. We knew we wouldn't get emotionally involved with anyone else, sex and love aren't one and the same thing.

I'm the same with another lady too. I can be really into her, but really enjoy watching her enjoy herself with someone else - male or female.

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By *liceandandyCouple over a year ago

Brighton

We're the ones who aren't jealous of our partners playing.... but we're uptight?!??

:o)

I do feel a bit bad that everyone jumped down the poor guys throat. (Us included... soz... *holds hands up*) it's just surely a basic requirement for swingers!

Don't think it's about 'haters' ... just about treating each other with respect.

"Wow OP, sorry you got roasted by so many uptight people! You only asked a question!!

Lots of good replies that explain how it works for them, I think it's a great thread. Educational and interesting.

I didn't ever understand it either but I do now. -But I don't think I'd swing with a future partner, same as you. Haters gonna hate....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We're the ones who aren't jealous of our partners playing.... but we're uptight?!??

:o)

I do feel a bit bad that everyone jumped down the poor guys throat. (Us included... soz... *holds hands up*) it's just surely a basic requirement for swingers!

Don't think it's about 'haters' ... just about treating each other with respect.

Wow OP, sorry you got roasted by so many uptight people! You only asked a question!!

Lots of good replies that explain how it works for them, I think it's a great thread. Educational and interesting.

I didn't ever understand it either but I do now. -But I don't think I'd swing with a future partner, same as you. Haters gonna hate....

A fundemental flaw with swinging is there are many people in the scene with hang ups and jealousy issues, from the single guys & girls who wouldn't share a future partner (like the OP) the non kissers, via the couples where only the lady can play right through to the couples looking for a single lady only to share, it's smacks of a selfish attitude and issues and is not conducive to swinging harmony where everyone just enjoys themselves

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I find it quite offensive that you assume couples are here because their relationship is failing, reckon you've talked yourself out of meeting a lot of couples now

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By *MaleMan over a year ago

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

A single male who's been here a few years, met cpls etc coming out with the latter. Puzzling.

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By *oo hotCouple over a year ago

North West

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

Immature. Doesn't know the meaning of love, trust and honesty.

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By *oo hotCouple over a year ago

North West

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

It is people like like you that we actually feel sorry for because your post smacks entirely of your own personal control issues. The idea of love is that you love, trust and accept everything that the person who you choose to be with wants. The very issue that you can't accept that this other person might want or enjoy something that you don't control appears to be a problem to you suggests that you should not even be here,

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We're the ones who aren't jealous of our partners playing.... but we're uptight?!??

:o)

I do feel a bit bad that everyone jumped down the poor guys throat. (Us included... soz... *holds hands up*) it's just surely a basic requirement for swingers!

Don't think it's about 'haters' ... just about treating each other with respect.

Wow OP, sorry you got roasted by so many uptight people! You only asked a question!!

Lots of good replies that explain how it works for them, I think it's a great thread. Educational and interesting.

I didn't ever understand it either but I do now. -But I don't think I'd swing with a future partner, same as you. Haters gonna hate....

That's unfair . Only I play and it's nothing to do with jealousy or hang ups

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

Couldn't agree more. Although I love meeting couples there is something that would sure mess with my head too. ..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Everyone has different thing that turn them on. Shocker!

I don't understand why people are on a swingers site if they can't comprehend this fact and don't understand swinging or swingers.

There's enough of that in the real world, without having to deal with it on here as well.

Ruby

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

Generally its easier to understand things that coincide with your own way of thinking. I don't think you should try and understand why couples swing because everyone has their own reasons. All I know is that love and sex aren't the same thing and loving someone doesn't mean you own their body or them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think I really want to understand so am fascinated by this thread especially from the husbands viewpoint . Any husband who enjoys this i would love to hear and feel free to PM me please?

However from my point of view i fully agree with the OP views and if i was sharing my wife it would really mess me up.

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By *rightonsteveMan over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I, on the other hand, would love it if my wife was a swinger. C'est la vie

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

The beauty of having a relationship which allows complete sexual freedom , with no jealousy , hate , anger or fear is the best thing one can imagine .

The knowing that my wife wants me , always goes home with me , and enjoys the fun with others all the more because she knows I love to see it is far from a mind fuck . It's a liberating and empowering feeling which makes me feel fantastic .

And the same goes for her when she sees me play , she calls it her wank bank material !

After six years of doing this , and five years of marriage it just gets better

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

Immature. Doesn't know the meaning of love, trust and honesty."

It doesn't make him immature to not want to swing r know the meaning of trust , love and honesty. Not everyone can swing or even like the idea of it as most of the country will tell you.

Attacking the poster for it is not very tolerant especially as a lot of swingers say others who don't swing should be more tolerant of what we do.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

The idea of love is that you love, trust and accept everything that the person who you choose to be with wants.

Really? even if you really didn't want to do it?

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By *oo hotCouple over a year ago

North West

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

Immature. Doesn't know the meaning of love, trust and honesty.

It doesn't make him immature to not want to swing r know the meaning of trust , love and honesty. Not everyone can swing or even like the idea of it as most of the country will tell you.

Attacking the poster for it is not very tolerant especially as a lot of swingers say others who don't swing should be more tolerant of what we do."

I would hardly call it an "attack." An observation and an opinion based on experience and a reading of the post maybe - an attack?? Really???

As a couple who has been on this scene for 12+ years there is something particularly irksome about this kind of attitude that we have experienced more than once from single guys. One guy we remember was physically ejected from Chameleons for having just such a conversation with a couple who we know well.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

I don't 'share' my partners. They're not 'mine'. They are their own people who are free to do whatever they want.

Some of my partners like having sex casually with other people - and if they enjoy that, why would I stop them?

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple over a year ago

London

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

Immature. Doesn't know the meaning of love, trust and honesty.

It doesn't make him immature to not want to swing r know the meaning of trust , love and honesty. Not everyone can swing or even like the idea of it as most of the country will tell you.

Attacking the poster for it is not very tolerant especially as a lot of swingers say others who don't swing should be more tolerant of what we do.

I would hardly call it an "attack." An observation and an opinion based on experience and a reading of the post maybe - an attack?? Really???

Indeed. I think the attitude has an underlay of sneering contempt - I. E. You are a pair of saddos with no self respect which I am happy to take advantage of. I would take more care of MY woman.

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By *urvymamaWoman over a year ago

Doncaster

I personally think if that's the attitude a person has they're better suited to a casual dating site as opposed to a swingers site

I couldn't be in monogamous relationship, if it was a choice between that and being single, I'd rather be single

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By *orrow my wifeCouple over a year ago

Brighton

Well done OP. It's nice that you want to understand the views and why couples swing and try to understand that.

I think there are some very silly self centered couples on here that do not see beyond themselves?

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man over a year ago

Kent

Well from messages im getting . Couples say to me they dont understand why they do it or why others do . Its a very complex issue . Not one im slating or praising . Im just intrigued how after a few years on here how people develop into swingers . Nothing more nothing less .

A few on here..shaking fists in the air or trying to advertise on here i wont be meeting couples again ..well i can tell you only a few are offended by this debate and quite a few are up for a social ect so we can have a giggle about this thread . Well i can certainly say ...posting on threads gets you recognised hahaha .

Now i know how Celebs work

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Do some couples feel they need to Swing to keep there relationship together ? Or is it that the relationship virtually over and you use eachother to meet others ? ....these issues i can understand .

Immature. Doesn't know the meaning of love, trust and honesty.

It doesn't make him immature to not want to swing r know the meaning of trust , love and honesty. Not everyone can swing or even like the idea of it as most of the country will tell you.

Attacking the poster for it is not very tolerant especially as a lot of swingers say others who don't swing should be more tolerant of what we do.

I would hardly call it an "attack." An observation and an opinion based on experience and a reading of the post maybe - an attack?? Really???

Yes

Just because he dared to say the lifestyle isn't for him and your experience in a club coupled with your 12 years playing doesn't make him immature

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By *onny-n-clydeCouple over a year ago

cwmbran,

"Or maybe we love to see our partners enjoying themselves and appreciated, just as they enjoy seeing the same applied to us?i totally get that but it's not for all, I would join a couple but wouldn't like a guy me n my mrs, seems shallow but I think it's how most guys think please don't speak for "most males as a) it's not true! B) some of us are secure enough in ourselves and our relationships to be able to do this without jelousy and c) well there isn't a "c" but it doesn't need one. I don't think this site or this lifestyle is for you. "

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Ok OP...for the posts I have removed you are getting as defensive as the couples who have taken your comments personally.

A bit of advice...If you don't want peoples opinions on something then don't start a thread asking for them.

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