FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > What's more rude in your opinion?
What's more rude in your opinion?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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If you get a message from someone who you don't find attractive but they seem like a really nice person do you sometimes feel bad about ignoring their message? But on the flip side so you think messaging them telling them they're not your cup of tea is just as rude? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I'd rather be told. But there was a huge debate about this once that its better to just delete.
Unfortunately like every thread like this, the answer will always be, some people do, some people dont |
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"If you get a message from someone who you don't find attractive but they seem like a really nice person do you sometimes feel bad about ignoring their message? But on the flip side so you think messaging them telling them they're not your cup of tea is just as rude? "
its better to be truthful  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I thought the unwritten rule of online stuff is that if someone ignores you, they're not interested. I'd rather that than someone message me to say they're not interested... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If they seem like nice people, I would pay them the respect of politely declining. "
Yeah this is what I've started doing, but I think if it was me I'd rather be ignored  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've got to the stage on here now where I don't think either scenarios are rude.
With regards to my inbox I do what makes me happy, if that makes me up my own arse then so be it. |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
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i feel bad if a guy seems to have gone to some effort for me and i don't reply back.
but just coz someone is polite in that initial message does not mean they will take rejection well.
i rejected a guy last night who i was talking to (figured as we'd arranged a social it was only polite to tell him i didn't wanna meet him any more), he asked when were we meeting for sex despite us initially saying it was a social, he thought he'd get sex instead), tbh i shouldda known from that he was a snidey, lying douche and just blocked him.
anyway i said i didn't wanna meet him and he kicked off. showed himself for what he really is and i'm glad i rejected him. but from now on i will not be the 'polite' one coz i'm not here to be abused. |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
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sorry, went off track there...
it is more rude to not interact with someone than it is to tell someone how you really feel.
but it's understandable why we are rude. as well as for the abuse reasons we often don't have the time to tell everyone we don't want to meet that we don't want to meet them. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"i feel bad if a guy seems to have gone to some effort for me and i don't reply back.
but just coz someone is polite in that initial message does not mean they will take rejection well.
i rejected a guy last night who i was talking to (figured as we'd arranged a social it was only polite to tell him i didn't wanna meet him any more), he asked when were we meeting for sex despite us initially saying it was a social, he thought he'd get sex instead), tbh i shouldda known from that he was a snidey, lying douche and just blocked him.
anyway i said i didn't wanna meet him and he kicked off. showed himself for what he really is and i'm glad i rejected him. but from now on i will not be the 'polite' one coz i'm not here to be abused."
This is very true, although I sometimes get abuse if Ive opened a messaged and havent replied within 30 seconds |
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"i feel bad if a guy seems to have gone to some effort for me and i don't reply back.
but just coz someone is polite in that initial message does not mean they will take rejection well.
i rejected a guy last night who i was talking to (figured as we'd arranged a social it was only polite to tell him i didn't wanna meet him any more), he asked when were we meeting for sex despite us initially saying it was a social, he thought he'd get sex instead), tbh i shouldda known from that he was a snidey, lying douche and just blocked him.
anyway i said i didn't wanna meet him and he kicked off. showed himself for what he really is and i'm glad i rejected him. but from now on i will not be the 'polite' one coz i'm not here to be abused."
Sorry to hear this... hugs |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
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"i feel bad if a guy seems to have gone to some effort for me and i don't reply back.
but just coz someone is polite in that initial message does not mean they will take rejection well.
i rejected a guy last night who i was talking to (figured as we'd arranged a social it was only polite to tell him i didn't wanna meet him any more), he asked when were we meeting for sex despite us initially saying it was a social, he thought he'd get sex instead), tbh i shouldda known from that he was a snidey, lying douche and just blocked him.
anyway i said i didn't wanna meet him and he kicked off. showed himself for what he really is and i'm glad i rejected him. but from now on i will not be the 'polite' one coz i'm not here to be abused.
This is very true, although I sometimes get abuse if Ive opened a messaged and havent replied within 30 seconds "
gotta just remember that this place is very much NSA and most who approach you are only doing it for themselves and to get what they want, and full of undesirable types who are not honest with you, people who can turn from mr nice and charming to mr evil for no real reason at all (apart from they know how to fake being nice).
you have to change who you are as a person sometime because others force you to, to protect yourself. if you had manners before you came here you probably will have these thoughts and feel bad about saying no or rejecting guys or ignoring them but if you remember the above it helps a lot. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd prefer to get a no thank you.
But then again, not everyone takes them as well as I do.
You do take them well   "
Haha..oi..cheeky
Still got my eye on you gorgeous  |
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"This is very true, although I sometimes get abuse if Ive opened a messaged and havent replied within 30 seconds "
A guy once threatened to do something very nasty to me cos i didn't respond to his emails quick enough .. |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
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"i feel bad if a guy seems to have gone to some effort for me and i don't reply back.
but just coz someone is polite in that initial message does not mean they will take rejection well.
i rejected a guy last night who i was talking to (figured as we'd arranged a social it was only polite to tell him i didn't wanna meet him any more), he asked when were we meeting for sex despite us initially saying it was a social, he thought he'd get sex instead), tbh i shouldda known from that he was a snidey, lying douche and just blocked him.
anyway i said i didn't wanna meet him and he kicked off. showed himself for what he really is and i'm glad i rejected him. but from now on i will not be the 'polite' one coz i'm not here to be abused.
Sorry to hear this... hugs"
things like this do bring down my faith in humanity and ensure i'm even more picky (and in turn more isolate myself from people).
i hate being reminded of just how evil people can be, and all for a fuck? i just think if he got that angry when he lost control over sex with me in a message then i had a very lucky escape by not meeting him.
but thanks. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"gotta just remember that this place is very much NSA and most who approach you are only doing it for themselves and to get what they want, and full of undesirable types who are not honest with you, people who can turn from mr nice and charming to mr evil for no real reason at all (apart from they know how to fake being nice).
you have to change who you are as a person sometime because others force you to, to protect yourself. if you had manners before you came here you probably will have these thoughts and feel bad about saying no or rejecting guys or ignoring them but if you remember the above it helps a lot."
I'm very quickly learning this, I think I've been very lucky because the majority of the guys I've met from here have been gentlemen (except one, but that's a different story)
But on another hand it makes me feel a bit better if I reject a guy and he turns nasty because then I think imagine if I had actually met him without knowing his true colours (if that makes any sense) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd prefer to get a no thank you.
But then again, not everyone takes them as well as I do.
You do take them well
Haha..oi..cheeky
Still got my eye on you gorgeous "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd prefer to get a no thank you.
But then again, not everyone takes them as well as I do.
You do take them well
Haha..oi..cheeky
Still got my eye on you gorgeous
"
You tease..lol
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I walk down the street & wink at a pretty girl or blow her a cheeky kiss & she just walks on by (sad face) I don't feel obliged to chase after her to find out why...
I don't find it rude if she blanks me but if she stopped & told me why I never stood a chance (even politely) I think I'd feel a little bit shit. |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
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"gotta just remember that this place is very much NSA and most who approach you are only doing it for themselves and to get what they want, and full of undesirable types who are not honest with you, people who can turn from mr nice and charming to mr evil for no real reason at all (apart from they know how to fake being nice).
you have to change who you are as a person sometime because others force you to, to protect yourself. if you had manners before you came here you probably will have these thoughts and feel bad about saying no or rejecting guys or ignoring them but if you remember the above it helps a lot.
I'm very quickly learning this, I think I've been very lucky because the majority of the guys I've met from here have been gentlemen (except one, but that's a different story)
But on another hand it makes me feel a bit better if I reject a guy and he turns nasty because then I think imagine if I had actually met him without knowing his true colours (if that makes any sense) "
i suspect a lot more guys remain nice after meeting in the hope of more sex to come. but i also suspect i'm more suspicious of men in general so probably wrong about the above despite it being my gut feeling. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you get a message from someone who you don't find attractive but they seem like a really nice person do you sometimes feel bad about ignoring their message? But on the flip side so you think messaging them telling them they're not your cup of tea is just as rude? "
If they are nice people then you should invite them round, raise a family with them, stay loyal to them until death parts you, and still say nothing...
Or just delete, as delete means "not for me thanks" |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If they are nice people then you should invite them round, raise a family with them, stay loyal to them until death parts you, and still say nothing...
Or just delete, as delete means "not for me thanks""
I was actually considering this but I don't think my house mate would approve hahaha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When I walk down the street & wink at a pretty girl or blow her a cheeky kiss & she just walks on by (sad face) I don't feel obliged to chase after her to find out why...
I don't find it rude if she blanks me but if she stopped & told me why I never stood a chance (even politely) I think I'd feel a little bit shit."
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When I walk down the street & wink at a pretty girl or blow her a cheeky kiss & she just walks on by (sad face) I don't feel obliged to chase after her to find out why...
I don't find it rude if she blanks me but if she stopped & told me why I never stood a chance (even politely) I think I'd feel a little bit shit."
The thing is you've used chasing a girl down the road to highlight how ridiculous it is, but some guys do actually do this lol |
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If I enjoy taking with them I will carry on talking, I can only go so far with the flirting/banter if I don't fancy them, But I usually say early in the messages, In most cases they stop messaging me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When I walk down the street & wink at a pretty girl or blow her a cheeky kiss & she just walks on by (sad face) I don't feel obliged to chase after her to find out why...
I don't find it rude if she blanks me but if she stopped & told me why I never stood a chance (even politely) I think I'd feel a little bit shit."
Thats an interesting way of putting it |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
Sorry but as a guy that has sat with a single female while she sorts through the 200+ messages and seeing the abuse she sometimes gets for saying no thanks or as said, of that 200+ several will be from the same guys getting more & more irate I'd say this.
Do not expect a response, your mail is no better than junk mail through the door, sometimes it's useful like a new pricelist from the Chinese up the road which you may keep but may not ever call but most of the time its junk. And sometimes if there's too much of it you pick the whole lot up & throw it straight in the bin..
My friend now has everyone blocked and messages herself.
S
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My friend now has everyone blocked and messages herself.
S
"
I tried that, but found the messages I sent myself were predictable and boring, so I blocked me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If they have taken time send a polite message. We normally send a sorry we not interested but good luck. . Then block. If it's a one line message or obviously not read profile it's ignore and block. Saves nasty messages been sent back. Marie ? |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
"My friend now has everyone blocked and messages herself.
S
I tried that, but found the messages I sent myself were predictable and boring, so I blocked me "
you know very well what I meant! I blame this here Sailor Jerry chap
S |
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I cant remember when I last sent any messages, But I do know they where all ignored/deleted without a reply, Most where first contact but a few was to people I had chatted with before,
I will probably just stick to fab socials or clubs for any future meets and leave the messaging to people who contact me
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If they have taken time send a polite message. We normally send a sorry we not interested but good luck. . Then block. If it's a one line message or obviously not read profile it's ignore and block. Saves nasty messages been sent back. Marie ? "
This is a good idea, it also saves being sent the exact same copy and paste message again a few weeks down the line lol
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Me personally, a "no thanks" message is better than nothing. Although females do have a wide range of message types to go through, from the genuine thought out ones to the poor grammatical typed with one hand stroking his cock hoping for an immediate response to his dick pic ones.
Guess it's how nice you're feeling... if it's the one I sent you then respond back with a "I like your dick pic!" |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Guess it's how nice you're feeling... if it's the one I sent you then respond back with a "I like your dick pic!" "
Was this aimed at me lol? I haven't received a message off you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Guess it's how nice you're feeling... if it's the one I sent you then respond back with a "I like your dick pic!"
Was this aimed at me lol? I haven't received a message off you?"
It was but let's just ignore it... since my humour is lost on you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Neither are rude.
As an ugly bug I accept that Im not everybodies cup of tea.
I do like receiving 'No thank you, but good luck in your search' messages.
"
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Guess it's how nice you're feeling... if it's the one I sent you then respond back with a "I like your dick pic!"
Was this aimed at me lol? I haven't received a message off you?
It was but let's just ignore it... since my humour is lost on you "
Oh sorry hahaha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Guess it's how nice you're feeling... if it's the one I sent you then respond back with a "I like your dick pic!"
Was this aimed at me lol? I haven't received a message off you?
It was but let's just ignore it... since my humour is lost on you
Oh sorry hahaha "
Besides I wouldn't breach your filter anyway! And dick pics aren't exactly my thing... I'm super classy me! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nothing rude about saying no thanks. No one is attracted to everyone, but personally I appreciate a polite reply rather than being ignored, although I know some of you ladies would have a full time job of replying to messages lol. |
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