FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Porn = Unrealistic real life expectations
Porn = Unrealistic real life expectations
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Can't help but see a massive correlation between what is widely available on the web in terms of pornography and the attitude of some on this site.
In the chat rooms, in the forums, even in many profiles one can see the language of extreme porn and a complete dehumanisation of females/couples in terms of respect.
Bashing ya back doors in, get ya tits out, gonna fuck you like a slut, ride you all night long etc etc etc, not sure those ever got me pulled in a club, so can't see it happening in here for anyone.
Have people in general, not just single lads, lost the way in terms of approach? I see Many a comment about nasty messages being sent when people are told no thanks.
Just a discussion topic here guys not accusational x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i'm pretty sure them adverts on porn sites give guys the impression we are what is being advertised.
"horny milf in your area up for anything""
Are those vids not documentaries? Shit. That explains a lot  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The Expendables is a true life depiction of life as a mercenary. Porn is there for one reason, and anyone in this day and age sees it as replicating real life is sad. They were probably sad before looking at porn. Because if they had had genuine relationships with women they would not use those terms in addressing women. Porn is used as an excuse for poor relationships with women and bad male behaviour. |
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The problem is that some people (mainly single guys it has to be said) wrongly think that what they see in porn is what swinging is all about. You only need to look at some of the fantasies they list in the forum.
In real life swinging it's much more complex and not everyone wants everything. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Can't help but see a massive correlation between what is widely available on the web in terms of pornography and the attitude of some on this site.
In the chat rooms, in the forums, even in many profiles one can see the language of extreme porn and a complete dehumanisation of females/couples in terms of respect.
Bashing ya back doors in, get ya tits out, gonna fuck you like a slut, ride you all night long etc etc etc, not sure those ever got me pulled in a club, so can't see it happening in here for anyone.
Have people in general, not just single lads, lost the way in terms of approach? I see Many a comment about nasty messages being sent when people are told no thanks.
Just a discussion topic here guys not accusational x"
Unfortunately some are unable to differentiate between what is real and what is not, personally speaking we would delete and block as it's not pleasant receiving messages like that as a first message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Context and trust is everything. As with all things in life there is a time and place. That language has a place with some women and couples who do get turned on by it. However, I'm sure before reaching that stage some sense of trust must have been built up. It seems the majority of guys here, get horny and think everyone on Fab is here for their pleasure and amusement. |
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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago
CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly) |
I think and this is just my thought.
The Web has a lot to answer too, not just in the case of how men approach women, and the language used on here. But also it has had an effect on life in general.
Yes technology is great and will continue to expand and encroach on our lives to a greater extent. Sometimes for the good, sometimes for the not so good.
Verbal communication is becoming increasingly harder these days. I find a lot more interaction takes place through a screen, than it does as a one to one, or group.
Mobile phones are just an extention of the hand for so many now, that other real life people, standing right beside you become invisible. Put down the phones and verbally communicate and interact with those you are with, it's a lot more fun.
Have proper long conversations instead of short text speech to convey your thoughts and feelings, this has been lost for too long.
Just my rambling thoughts anyway. Have fun and good luck with your "fancy a fuck" "gonna bang your pussy till it hurts" messages. But don't complain when you get ignored xxxxx Suzi |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do not intend to make of this post a war gender, but I think the deshumanisation doesn't only apply only to female or couple.
Pornography implifies the instectual level and tend to normalise such behaviours yet it isn't the only responsible. The hypersexualisation of the society, the lack of sexual awarness and the objectification of women/men in selling adverts for instance contribute to the belief that human being are sexual objects made to be used. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"I do not intend to make of this post a war gender, but I think the deshumanisation doesn't only apply only to female or couple.
Pornography implifies the instectual level and tend to normalise such behaviours yet it isn't the only responsible. The hypersexualisation of the society, the lack of sexual awarness and the objectification of women/men in selling adverts for instance contribute to the belief that human being are sexual objects made to be used. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I think OP'S original thread initially stated porn caused bad behaviour in men. I stated earlier this is more to do with those men not having proper relationships with women and therefore not understanding porn is entertainment and not reality, and you do not address women in that manner.
F&B expanded that to the common complaint of sexualisation of society, something with which I would disagree. Adverts and legitimate businesses cannot get away with the level of sexualised imagery which they did in the past. I remember starting work in the last days of pin ups in offices. Most legitimate businesses cannot use the female shape to sell products as before. I would put the issues down more to a society that demands instant gratification and feel the right to say whatever they want without filtering their comments or putting themselves in other peoples shoes. |
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Porn had affected me insofar as when we have building works done, I expect the men to be topless, model like with muscles and huge cocks who are bisexual. The reality is a couple of middle aged, slobby, unfit old guys who just do the bloody job and go home. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can't help but see a massive correlation between what is widely available on the web in terms of pornography and the attitude of some on this site.
In the chat rooms, in the forums, even in many profiles one can see the language of extreme porn and a complete dehumanisation of females/couples in terms of respect.
Bashing ya back doors in, get ya tits out, gonna fuck you like a slut, ride you all night long etc etc etc, not sure those ever got me pulled in a club, so can't see it happening in here for anyone.
Have people in general, not just single lads, lost the way in terms of approach? I see Many a comment about nasty messages being sent when people are told no thanks.
Just a discussion topic here guys not accusational x"
Agree 100 per cent |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I think OP'S original thread initially stated porn caused bad behaviour in men. I stated earlier this is more to do with those men not having proper relationships with women and therefore not understanding porn is entertainment and not reality, and you do not address women in that manner.
F&B expanded that to the common complaint of sexualisation of society, something with which I would disagree. Adverts and legitimate businesses cannot get away with the level of sexualised imagery which they did in the past. I remember starting work in the last days of pin ups in offices. Most legitimate businesses cannot use the female shape to sell products as before. I would put the issues down more to a society that demands instant gratification and feel the right to say whatever they want without filtering their comments or putting themselves in other peoples shoes."
The bad behaviour in men and not having proper relationships with women are related, no? And no doubt influenced by watching too much porn and becoming unaccustomed to genuine human contact. Much like the chat on another thread about breaking up with partners by text/KIK/Skype. As if they're not real people. |
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Don't you think that this is just another aspect of the deterioration in what is and what isn't socially acceptable?
Specifically I'm talking about the almost total acceptance of really bad language in public; don't get me wrong I do swear but like my dad said to me as a teenager "I know you are going to swear but as an example,at his workplace (mainly all male) , as soon as a woman came within earshot the bad language stopped and if someone hadn't noticed and carried on they were told in no uncertain terms to stop " .... now it's common place for youngsters to older people to "fuck this,fuck that,c**t "etc and don't see what the problem is with that.
I know this has nothing to do with porn but just thought I'd expand on the subject......rant over lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can't help but see a massive correlation between what is widely available on the web in terms of pornography and the attitude of some on this site.
In the chat rooms, in the forums, even in many profiles one can see the language of extreme porn and a complete dehumanisation of females/couples in terms of respect.
Bashing ya back doors in, get ya tits out, gonna fuck you like a slut, ride you all night long etc etc etc, not sure those ever got me pulled in a club, so can't see it happening in here for anyone.
Have people in general, not just single lads, lost the way in terms of approach? I see Many a comment about nasty messages being sent when people are told no thanks.
Just a discussion topic here guys not accusational x"
I have yet to see the terms used above in any porn that I have watched perhaps I'm watching the wrong ones. I disagree that porn changes people's attitude to how they speak to people I think it is society in general and that anyone can say what they want on the net within reason and get away with it. It's the comfort culture that has manifested in recent years of overconfidence due to lack of consequence and repercussion therefore again getting away with it until someone challenges them and they are out of their comfort zone.
As with what I have seen from the physical side of porn. Yes I believe I have acted out many a porn movie.  |
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Slightly off topic but along the same sort of lines how ever I feel the internet has dehumanized us. We have become just a name and sometimes a avatar. A lot of people ( especially on here ) tend to forget that there's a person just like them at the end of their username with the same hopes, dreams and feelings as they have and yet so often the other username gets tossed to one side as if they don't matter. Its the same with manners if your not a rude person in real life why be like that online ? Just because you can hide behind a screen isn't an excuse theres a real person behind that user name !
There you go my two pennith worth lol |
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Porn is total fantasy very doubtful if 99% of the senarios happen in real life
As a person that was in the porn industry I can clearly state that porn is just actually acting with a bit of fucking and sucking thrown in |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"i'm pretty sure them adverts on porn sites give guys the impression we are what is being advertised.
"horny milf in your area up for anything"
Are those vids not documentaries? Shit. That explains a lot "
National Geographics  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Totally agree that real life needs more respect and kindness. But... the sex depicted in porn is feasible. If you like the look of it, try it! Those that say "real sex isn't like that" are being unfair, some people want sex like that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not sure porn has that bid an effect, its giving some people what they want, which is to objectify women. This doesn't actually work in the real world. You can treat women as things as much as you like but your never going to get laid.
An analogy is I quite like the series the walking dead it's thrilling and suspenseful. Would I like to experience a zombie apocalypse first hand, God no.
Porn is like that, its recreation. |
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Nowadays, most people expect sex to be just like porn. Specially on sotes like this.Many threads on here prove that.
"Women don't know how to deep throat ", " she/he doesn't want her/his arse ripped ", " why won't she FAF?", "oh, time wasters!", "time waster don't suck cock"... And so on
To high expectations brings disappointment. And many who like porn style sex, are the most boring ones.
That's my two cents.
HK  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The worst aspect of this is the impression it gives to the young. It's free availabilty results in such language and behaviour being bandied about by those who should still be playing with action men. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Porn has given people unhealthy and unrealistic expectations of how long it takes for a plumber to turn up  "
Snorted my coffee through my nose at this one!!
Any nubile young thing would have turned into a GILF by the time my plumber turned up. Then he pops his head round the back door, eyeballs the boiler from 10' away, makes a wild (and usually wrong diagnosis) and buggers off muttering about parts. Porn would die out if they based some of their scenarios on true-life activities!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can't help but see a massive correlation between what is widely available on the web in terms of pornography and the attitude of some on this site.
In the chat rooms, in the forums, even in many profiles one can see the language of extreme porn and a complete dehumanisation of females/couples in terms of respect.
Bashing ya back doors in, get ya tits out, gonna fuck you like a slut, ride you all night long etc etc etc, not sure those ever got me pulled in a club, so can't see it happening in here for anyone.
x"
Uou still watching 70's porn then |
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Commercial "porn" causes a lot of problems. Especially as its very narrow repeat view gives a totally false misimpression of reality out there.
The kaleidoscope of show-your-own erotica is the opposite - helps you find yourself and gives you some inkling of the reality out there.
At sex clubs and group sex events, often having to tell young males it doesn't work that way in reality / stop that which is trying to copy what you've seen in commercial porn. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I really don't think it's porn that gives men on sex/swinging sites unrealistic expectations.....
It's the fact that men when signing up for a website are very horny and ready to have sex.....and expect any woman on the same website to be horny and ready to have sex.... after about a week of rejection... they learn it takes more effort than just uploading a few cock pics and sending fancy a fuck messages.....
Porn is really used to get creative ideas in the bedroom.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That is because those women are professionals in what they do, it is their job, for example, they know all the tricks in the book to do the perfect deepthroat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really don't think it's porn that gives men on sex/swinging sites unrealistic expectations.....
It's the fact that men when signing up for a website are very horny and ready to have sex.....and expect any woman on the same website to be horny and ready to have sex.... after about a week of rejection... they learn it takes more effort than just uploading a few cock pics and sending fancy a fuck messages.....
Porn is really used to get creative ideas in the bedroom...."
Really? Rather than relying on your own personal creativity/imagination and the tastes of your partner? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really don't think it's porn that gives men on sex/swinging sites unrealistic expectations.....
It's the fact that men when signing up for a website are very horny and ready to have sex.....and expect any woman on the same website to be horny and ready to have sex.... after about a week of rejection... they learn it takes more effort than just uploading a few cock pics and sending fancy a fuck messages.....
Porn is really used to get creative ideas in the bedroom....
Really? Rather than relying on your own personal creativity/imagination and the tastes of your partner?"
Well think of porn like watching a instructornal video on YouTube..... You know how to paint a room .... but sometimes you just want to see other ways That some people do it... |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"I really don't think it's porn that gives men on sex/swinging sites unrealistic expectations.....
It's the fact that men when signing up for a website are very horny and ready to have sex.....and expect any woman on the same website to be horny and ready to have sex.... after about a week of rejection... they learn it takes more effort than just uploading a few cock pics and sending fancy a fuck messages.....
Porn is really used to get creative ideas in the bedroom....
Really? Rather than relying on your own personal creativity/imagination and the tastes of your partner?
Well think of porn like watching a instructornal video on YouTube..... You know how to paint a room .... but sometimes you just want to see other ways That some people do it..."
Porn is fiction made to get people off, hence the appalling storylines. No-one should watch porn for tips. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its not only adults who have unrealistic expectations from watching easily available porn but children/teenagers also.
Young girls think that because they arnt bisexual and dont take it up the arse and participate in gang bangs then they will be seen as boring and not cool ??
Easily accessible porn of all descriptions is a massive problem in todays society and can have worrying negative affects on children as well as adults. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really don't think it's porn that gives men on sex/swinging sites unrealistic expectations.....
It's the fact that men when signing up for a website are very horny and ready to have sex.....and expect any woman on the same website to be horny and ready to have sex.... after about a week of rejection... they learn it takes more effort than just uploading a few cock pics and sending fancy a fuck messages.....
Porn is really used to get creative ideas in the bedroom....
Really? Rather than relying on your own personal creativity/imagination and the tastes of your partner?
Well think of porn like watching a instructornal video on YouTube..... You know how to paint a room .... but sometimes you just want to see other ways That some people do it...
Porn is fiction made to get people off, hence the appalling storylines. No-one should watch porn for tips."
I've learned many new sexual positions by watching porn...... |
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