FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Lost interest

Lost interest

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes I know how it feels I have had abuse on here saying it's an excuse to cheat my wife went off sex 3 years ago where my sex drive is still high expect some abuse from people who don't understand the situation your in.

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By *mmmMaybeCouple over a year ago

West Wales

Yep, first wife me, second wife her, third wife just perfect!

Think there's a story there somewhere

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yes I know how it feels I have had abuse on here saying it's an excuse to cheat my wife went off sex 3 years ago where my sex drive is still high expect some abuse from people who don't understand the situation your in."

You probably got the abuse because you are on here without her knowledge ..

The reason why is often irrelevant ..

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Thanks for the replies. Awaiting the abuse.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

There are so many emotions tied up with sex making a situation like yours complicated.

As difficult as it is a long talk is necessary to find out why and if there's a resolution. Feeling rejected and missing intimacy must be soul destroying but talking about your wife to strangers isn't great either.

Good luck to both

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By *rightonsteveMan over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

Yeah same.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I can relate

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Put yourself in her shoes and think how shed feel if she found out if you love her there's always a solution

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There's only one person who can help you with the answer. If you can't communicate with a partner, suggest counselling, if they don't wish to engage, well, you know they have no real interest in meeting your needs. Where you decide to go from there is up to you.

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By *c-ukMan over a year ago

Sevenoaks

"Put yourself in her shoes and think how shed feel if she found out if you love her there's always a solution "

I would only go out with a woman that was prepared to cheat on me.. If she wont cheat on me she can just do one

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

Yes but don't let the cheating gestapo know

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Put yourself in her shoes and think how shed feel if she found out if you love her there's always a solution

I would only go out with a woman that was prepared to cheat on me.. If she wont cheat on me she can just do one

When we going on a date lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have you tried talking to her about it?

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By *oodmessMan over a year ago

yumsville

Love these replies:

Woman starts a thread; my man doesn't fuck me and all I want is a big cock sliding up my wet pussy. All she gets is praise for finally owning it, setting meets to satiate her needs and it's the blokes fault for not taking an interest over the years.

When it's the bloke. Fuck him, it's his fault for being a cheating twat on a site that is stupidly hard to meet on anyway.

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By *uzy444Woman over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

if i had ever got disinterested in sex with any of my partners, they wouldn't have been partners very long..

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"Love these replies:

When it's the bloke. Fuck him, it's his fault for being a cheating twat on a site that is stupidly hard to meet on anyway. "

There are a good few replies offering constructive advice

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By *oodmessMan over a year ago

yumsville

"Love these replies:

When it's the bloke. Fuck him, it's his fault for being a cheating twat on a site that is stupidly hard to meet on anyway.

There are a good few replies offering constructive advice

And a few pointing the finger

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By *harpDressed ManMan over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

Who's being humiliated in the OP, the man asking for the handjob, or the woman being asked to do something sexual that she's, by implication at least, not up for?

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By *eerobCouple over a year ago

solihull

"Love these replies:

When it's the bloke. Fuck him, it's his fault for being a cheating twat on a site that is stupidly hard to meet on anyway. "

Don't agree it's as bad if a male does it as a female. You should face up to the problem in the marriage and rectify it, rather than taking the easy way out and lie and cheat.

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By *oodmessMan over a year ago

yumsville

"Love these replies:

When it's the bloke. Fuck him, it's his fault for being a cheating twat on a site that is stupidly hard to meet on anyway.

Don't agree it's as bad if a male does it as a female. You should face up to the problem in the marriage and rectify it, rather than taking the easy way out and lie and cheat. "

It's absolutely obvious due to the number of males wanting to get on the good side of a woman. Replies on the whole from both sexes are ones of 'I can understand where you are coming from', 'ask him to see the Dr' or more meaningful ways to approach the subject rather than berating them for being on the site or blaming them that they are asking something too much in the first place. There is usually a lot more advice than judgement.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

No thank god

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"Love these replies:

When it's the bloke. Fuck him, it's his fault for being a cheating twat on a site that is stupidly hard to meet on anyway.

There are a good few replies offering constructive advice

And a few pointing the finger

It's a risk you take posting highly personal information about a third party on a forum.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Op are you giving her enough attention? Kisses and cuddles outside of the bedroom? Sometimes when a woman goes off sex it is because she is not getting the affection she wants outside of it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

These threads amuse me because cheaters are always so defensive!

Don't ask for other people's opinions if you don't like the answers it's quite simple.

Ask yourself if you would want it done to you.

Merry Christmas

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By *oodmessMan over a year ago

yumsville

"These threads amuse me because cheaters are always so defensive!

Don't ask for other people's opinions if you don't like the answers it's quite simple.

Ask yourself if you would want it done to you.

Merry Christmas

The OP has only made one reply, so if your comment was aimed at me, you're a little off target. I was making an observation of the responses given to men as opposed to women on threads like these. Sorry to differ an all.

Merry Christmas

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"These threads amuse me because cheaters are always so defensive!

Don't ask for other people's opinions if you don't like the answers it's quite simple.

Ask yourself if you would want it done to you.

Merry Christmas

Like I said ....

Defensive ..

It wasn't aimed at you.

But this is - as I pressed the quote button.

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By *iamondjoeMan over a year ago

Glastonbury

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

No.

Best sex I have ever had with anyone has consistently been with the other half.

That's not my excuse

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

No, I was faithful anyway.

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By *rthur WrightusMan over a year ago

Round the Bend

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

Yes I was in similar position, maybe worse, many years ago. At the time blamed constant overwork for both of us until she suddenly moved out to live with a younger man before Christmas ! Thereby followed an expensive divorce.

But every cloud has a silver lining as I had twelve fantastic years with a new partner before she died. And now recently I have the seeds of another relationship with a Brazilian girl. I have never cheated or been abusive.

On the other hand my ex wife has continued life with bad attitude and has courted trouble.

Not sure how relevant all this is to you except to say if you cannot talk and find a solution, don't be afraid of the future without her. Life is short .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

On the other hand my ex wife has continued life with bad attitude and has courted trouble.

Not sure how relevant all this is to you except to say if you cannot talk and find a solution, don't be afraid of the future without her. Life is short .

"
well said my good man

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By *oodmessMan over a year ago

yumsville

"These threads amuse me because cheaters are always so defensive!

Don't ask for other people's opinions if you don't like the answers it's quite simple.

Ask yourself if you would want it done to you.

Merry Christmas

Like I said ....

Defensive ..

It wasn't aimed at you.

But this is - as I pressed the quote button."

Defensive would be what you are doing.

long pauses ...

As if you have a point to prove but do not not have any facts...

to back up your ideas, but,

trying trying quite hard.

To justify it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

I see. So it's the man's fault...

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By *oodmessMan over a year ago

yumsville

[Removed by poster at 24/12/16 11:18:23]

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By *oodmessMan over a year ago

yumsville

Specifically to maryfuckingpoppins. A perfect example of the difference in responses of men posting threads like these v's women.

https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/lounge/585156

Merry Christmas

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By *oodmessMan over a year ago

yumsville

https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/help/585156

Something went wrong - working link.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wife went off sex 5 years ago I patiently waited but nothing changed. Started looking on here got caught although had never cheated she kicked me out and now on my own in homeless accommodation wishing I had never join as I have lost everything

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I had an *almost* completely sex less marriage for the last 7 years we were together....in fact our 2nd child was conceived the only time we had sex in about 14months

my sex drive never waned, but it was a symptom of a toxic relationship. I didn't cheat, but I did leave him. If you're not intimate with each other you're little more than friends, and that's unhealthy for both parties....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"These threads amuse me because cheaters are always so defensive!

Don't ask for other people's opinions if you don't like the answers it's quite simple.

Ask yourself if you would want it done to you.

Merry Christmas

Like I said ....

Defensive ..

It wasn't aimed at you.

But this is - as I pressed the quote button.

Defensive would be what you are doing.

long pauses ...

As if you have a point to prove but do not not have any facts...

to back up your ideas, but,

trying trying quite hard.

To justify it.

What?

that doesn't even make sense!

I'm not trying to justify anything.

I was just responding in a thread like everyone else!

A "single" bloke on a forum asks a question about why his partner might have gone off sex so I gave my opinion.

I'm sorry if that hits some sort of nerve with you

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By *ungBlackTopMan over a year ago

salford

well this is why we have fabswingers mate so you can get your dick wet somewhere else other than at home.

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By *oodmessMan over a year ago

yumsville

"These threads amuse me because cheaters are always so defensive!

Don't ask for other people's opinions if you don't like the answers it's quite simple.

Ask yourself if you would want it done to you.

Merry Christmas

Like I said ....

Defensive ..

It wasn't aimed at you.

But this is - as I pressed the quote button.

Defensive would be what you are doing.

long pauses ...

As if you have a point to prove but do not not have any facts...

to back up your ideas, but,

trying trying quite hard.

To justify it.

What?

that doesn't even make sense!

I'm not trying to justify anything.

I was just responding in a thread like everyone else!

A "single" bloke on a forum asks a question about why his partner might have gone off sex so I gave my opinion.

I'm sorry if that hits some sort of nerve with you

I think you enjoy flaming threads.

As said again. The OP has only responded once and I have several times. You aimed your comment of being defensive and being cheater at me. You have hit no nerve as I'm finding it funny how someone can accuse so much. If I made something up about you - would you like that?

You have missed the whole point of my post and all objectivity, probably due to being burned at some point. If you read it again, it was that women do not get the replies that men do on the same subject. As can plainly be seen in the above thread. Posted again here:

https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/help/585156

(shocked face)

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Put yourself in her shoes and think how shed feel if she found out if you love her there's always a solution "

Perhaps OP being on here is his solution.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Wife went off sex 5 years ago I patiently waited but nothing changed. Started looking on here got caught although had never cheated she kicked me out and now on my own in homeless accommodation wishing I had never join as I have lost everything "

You should of been more careful not to get caught.

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By *eavenscentitCouple over a year ago

barnstaple

I think it's the way you word it...the op sounds quite sad

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

On the other hand my ex wife has continued life with bad attitude and has courted trouble.

Not sure how relevant all this is to you except to say if you cannot talk and find a solution, don't be afraid of the future without her. Life is short .

But why should you walk away from a marriage that may be very happy except for the sexual side?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There's only one person who can help you with the answer. If you can't communicate with a partner, suggest counselling, if they don't wish to engage, well, you know they have no real interest in meeting your needs. Where you decide to go from there is up to you."

This isn't true in everyone's marriage.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

I don't believe she probably knows. If OP is very careful then there's no reason that she should know.

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By *eavenscentitCouple over a year ago

barnstaple

For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way"

I thought it was love that keeps people together.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

I don't believe she probably knows. If OP is very careful then there's no reason that she should know."

Love is only real if you're honest with the other person.

I really wouldn't like it if my partner was fucking people behind my back

I don't understand why this is so difficult for some to grasp

I'm not judging anyone - I just don't want to be a part of any of it - it's manky!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

I don't believe she probably knows. If OP is very careful then there's no reason that she should know.

Love is only real if you're honest with the other person.

I really wouldn't like it if my partner was fucking people behind my back

I don't understand why this is so difficult for some to grasp

I'm not judging anyone - I just don't want to be a part of any of it - it's manky!

Totally agree with you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

I don't believe she probably knows. If OP is very careful then there's no reason that she should know.

Love is only real if you're honest with the other person.

I really wouldn't like it if my partner was fucking people behind my back

I don't understand why this is so difficult for some to grasp

I'm not judging anyone - I just don't want to be a part of any of it - it's manky!

There is so much more to love than honesty. It can still be real. It also isn't difficult to grasp that you wouldn't like it if your partner was being unfaithful behind your back.

But life isn't ever black and white.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

from a male point of view and a male who cannot stay hard enough to please my partner fully, i welcome her having sex with other men and love to see her satisfied. i love her and want her to be fulfilled in every way , so i think its just a matter of honesty with each other,

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

I don't believe she probably knows. If OP is very careful then there's no reason that she should know.

Love is only real if you're honest with the other person.

I really wouldn't like it if my partner was fucking people behind my back

I don't understand why this is so difficult for some to grasp

I'm not judging anyone - I just don't want to be a part of any of it - it's manky!

There is so much more to love than honesty. It can still be real. It also isn't difficult to grasp that you wouldn't like it if your partner was being unfaithful behind your back.

But life isn't ever black and white."

For me love is all about honesty.

Staying with someone you lie to to keep the relationship/ circumstances is like being in prison!

I've been there.

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By *eepster1Man over a year ago

birmingham

Yep no interest at all she as been dead 5 years !

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yep no interest at all she as been dead 5 years !"

Literally or metaphorically speaking? If the latter why not try other avenues ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yep no interest at all she as been dead 5 years !

Literally or metaphorically speaking? If the latter why not try other avenues ?"

I think was a joke.

And is it weird that "other avenues" makes my brain picture a tombstone with a fleshlight in it?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yep no interest at all she as been dead 5 years !

Literally or metaphorically speaking? If the latter why not try other avenues ?

I think was a joke.

And is it weird that "other avenues" makes my brain picture a tombstone with a fleshlight in it?"

I was actually talking about counselling but you crack on with your train of thought

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

I don't believe she probably knows. If OP is very careful then there's no reason that she should know.

Love is only real if you're honest with the other person.

I really wouldn't like it if my partner was fucking people behind my back

I don't understand why this is so difficult for some to grasp

I'm not judging anyone - I just don't want to be a part of any of it - it's manky!

There is so much more to love than honesty. It can still be real. It also isn't difficult to grasp that you wouldn't like it if your partner was being unfaithful behind your back.

But life isn't ever black and white.

For me love is all about honesty.

Staying with someone you lie to to keep the relationship/ circumstances is like being in prison!

I've been there."

So you've been there and made mistakes, why the need to judge others? Surely you'd be a little more understanding of why people lie to their partners?!?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

I don't believe she probably knows. If OP is very careful then there's no reason that she should know.

Love is only real if you're honest with the other person.

I really wouldn't like it if my partner was fucking people behind my back

I don't understand why this is so difficult for some to grasp

I'm not judging anyone - I just don't want to be a part of any of it - it's manky!

There is so much more to love than honesty. It can still be real. It also isn't difficult to grasp that you wouldn't like it if your partner was being unfaithful behind your back.

But life isn't ever black and white.

For me love is all about honesty.

Staying with someone you lie to to keep the relationship/ circumstances is like being in prison!

I've been there."

I disagree. My marriage is nothing at all like a prison. Maybe you were with the wrong person.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

I don't believe she probably knows. If OP is very careful then there's no reason that she should know.

Love is only real if you're honest with the other person.

I really wouldn't like it if my partner was fucking people behind my back

I don't understand why this is so difficult for some to grasp

I'm not judging anyone - I just don't want to be a part of any of it - it's manky!

There is so much more to love than honesty. It can still be real. It also isn't difficult to grasp that you wouldn't like it if your partner was being unfaithful behind your back.

But life isn't ever black and white.

For me love is all about honesty.

Staying with someone you lie to to keep the relationship/ circumstances is like being in prison!

I've been there.

So you've been there and made mistakes, why the need to judge others? Surely you'd be a little more understanding of why people lie to their partners?!?"

I understand.

But I'm allowed an opinion too right?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"from a male point of view and a male who cannot stay hard enough to please my partner fully, i welcome her having sex with other men and love to see her satisfied. i love her and want her to be fulfilled in every way , so i think its just a matter of honesty with each other, "

That's great you have that attitude. Unfortunately not everyone is as understanding as yourself.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are many reasons why people are disinterested in sex with their partners - but one of them is because they can sense lying.

No matter how discrete you think you're being - she probably knows deep down that you are cheating on her.

I don't believe she probably knows. If OP is very careful then there's no reason that she should know.

Love is only real if you're honest with the other person.

I really wouldn't like it if my partner was fucking people behind my back

I don't understand why this is so difficult for some to grasp

I'm not judging anyone - I just don't want to be a part of any of it - it's manky!

There is so much more to love than honesty. It can still be real. It also isn't difficult to grasp that you wouldn't like it if your partner was being unfaithful behind your back.

But life isn't ever black and white.

For me love is all about honesty.

Staying with someone you lie to to keep the relationship/ circumstances is like being in prison!

I've been there.

So you've been there and made mistakes, why the need to judge others? Surely you'd be a little more understanding of why people lie to their partners?!?

I understand.

But I'm allowed an opinion too right?

Now you've changed your circumstances..... You had a different opinion one time, let's not forget about that. Chop and change whenever it suits by the sounds of things.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I went of sex with the ex husband,it felt like a chore rather than something pleasurable, I gave him permission to go play he took that badly.

Can't win

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable ""

My husband is extremely happy, as am I

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable ""

That's very true

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

My husband is extremely happy, as am I

Are you lying to him?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I was in the same boat. I stopped instigating sex and we didn't have any for years.

I gave up trying to work out what I had done and concentrated on other more important things.

Eventually, we parted ways.

I'm having Christmas dinner with him, his gf and our children tomorrow

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

My husband is extremely happy, as am I

Are you lying to him?"

He doesn't know I'm lying to him though...ignorance is bliss as the saying goes.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable ""

Exactly!

Put far more eloquently than what I was trying to say!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

My husband is extremely happy, as am I

Are you lying to him?

He doesn't know I'm lying to him though...ignorance is bliss as the saying goes.

So yes you're putting your happines before his.

What happens if he finds out?

Screw his pain and suffering cause you got some cheap thrills fucking strangers of the internet?

See to me that's not love thats just not having the balls to give a person you claim to love a choice of informed consent

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

Exactly!

Put far more eloquently than what I was trying to say!"

But if they are totally happy, and aren't aware of anything, then surely there's no issue. He's happy, I'm happy, it's a win win situation

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

My husband is extremely happy, as am I

Are you lying to him?

He doesn't know I'm lying to him though...ignorance is bliss as the saying goes.

So yes you're putting your happines before his.

What happens if he finds out?

Screw his pain and suffering cause you got some cheap thrills fucking strangers of the internet?

See to me that's not love thats just not having the balls to give a person you claim to love a choice of informed consent "

You don't know the circumstances. Nothing is ever straight forward. Our marriage is full of love and happiness, and he won't find out.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

Exactly!

Put far more eloquently than what I was trying to say!

But if they are totally happy, and aren't aware of anything, then surely there's no issue. He's happy, I'm happy, it's a win win situation

I'm not having a go just a curiosity question, would you feel the same way if you found out he was doing the same thing a win win

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

Exactly!

Put far more eloquently than what I was trying to say!

But if they are totally happy, and aren't aware of anything, then surely there's no issue. He's happy, I'm happy, it's a win win situation

I feel really sorry for your husband - I hope he discovers the real you very soon!

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By *eavenscentitCouple over a year ago

barnstaple

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together."

It wasn't enough for me...our sex life was nil - I felt shit.... 11 yrs without him.. if he had just touched

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together.

It wasn't enough for me...our sex life was nil - I felt shit.... 11 yrs without him.. if he had just touched "
sex produces oxytocin (spelling?) Which is a large part of bonding between humans.

Without it you'll naturally drift apart in most cases.

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By *eavenscentitCouple over a year ago

barnstaple

If they have lost interest they don't fancy you.....hard but true

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

Exactly!

Put far more eloquently than what I was trying to say!

But if they are totally happy, and aren't aware of anything, then surely there's no issue. He's happy, I'm happy, it's a win win situation

I feel really sorry for your husband - I hope he discovers the real you very soon!"

2 sides to evey story and all of that, but I shan't even try to explain to those that don't have the wisdom or knowledge to even try to understand.

Happy Christmas

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

Exactly!

Put far more eloquently than what I was trying to say!

But if they are totally happy, and aren't aware of anything, then surely there's no issue. He's happy, I'm happy, it's a win win situation

I'm not having a go just a curiosity question, would you feel the same way if you found out he was doing the same thing a win win "

Yes, actually, I would

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If they have lost interest they don't fancy you.....hard but true"

I fully sympathise with you. It's an extremely difficult situation to be in x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I was with someone for 5 years. I went a whole year without sex. I never cheated. When it came to the point where I couldn't do it anymore, I left him. It was hands down, one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. It turns out he was actually a-sexual.

So, when I'm faced with a thread about cheating, I always think that there is another option. However, life isn't always black and white, but I do wonder how people can live with the guilt.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I was with someone for 5 years. I went a whole year without sex. I never cheated. When it came to the point where I couldn't do it anymore, I left him. It was hands down, one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. It turns out he was actually a-sexual.

So, when I'm faced with a thread about cheating, I always think that there is another option. However, life isn't always black and white, but I do wonder how people can live with the guilt."

There are always other options, as there is with everything in life. I've chosen this option , if people don't agree then they can simply move on

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

No offense meant, but how about try getting yourself in shape so she Is physically attracted to you?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So, when I'm faced with a thread about cheating, I always think that there is another option. However, life isn't always black and white, but I do wonder how people can live with the guilt.

There are always other options, as there is with everything in life. I've chosen this option , if people don't agree then they can simply move on

Like I said, I get that life isn't black and white and people do things for their own reasons. I try not to judge.

I also think that by putting it on profiles, you at least give people the option of whether to engage with you based on your situation!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

No offense meant, but how about try getting yourself in shape so she Is physically attracted to you?"

How would someone not find that offensive!?

Dear me!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Same here I left my ex of 15 years and we didn't have penatrive sex for over 14 months but not once did I look at getting it else where I faced the issue head on and as hard as it was we split up. I could NEVER ever be unfaithful just one of my morals. I don't judge others though as that's down to their conscience and mortality

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"2 sides to evey story and all of that, but I shan't even try to explain to those that don't have the wisdom or knowledge to even try to understand.

Happy Christmas

I often wonder if some partners get treated better because the other ones having sex and are quite happy to live with that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So, when I'm faced with a thread about cheating, I always think that there is another option. However, life isn't always black and white, but I do wonder how people can live with the guilt.

There are always other options, as there is with everything in life. I've chosen this option , if people don't agree then they can simply move on

Like I said, I get that life isn't black and white and people do things for their own reasons. I try not to judge.

I also think that by putting it on profiles, you at least give people the option of whether to engage with you based on your situation! "

Exactly. From those I've met, not one of them has had an issue with my situation.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

No offense meant, but how about try getting yourself in shape so she Is physically attracted to you?"

That is a total insult to the OP. No need for that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So, when I'm faced with a thread about cheating, I always think that there is another option. However, life isn't always black and white, but I do wonder how people can live with the guilt.

There are always other options, as there is with everything in life. I've chosen this option , if people don't agree then they can simply move on

Like I said, I get that life isn't black and white and people do things for their own reasons. I try not to judge.

I also think that by putting it on profiles, you at least give people the option of whether to engage with you based on your situation!

Exactly. From those I've met, not one of them has had an issue with my situation.

I wouldn't have an 'issue' with a married man as such but we are talking about our OWN morals. And in that case I'd never do it end of. I think it's wrong and humiliating

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Same here I left my ex of 15 years and we didn't have penatrive sex for over 14 months but not once did I look at getting it else where I faced the issue head on and as hard as it was we split up. I could NEVER ever be unfaithful just one of my morals. I don't judge others though as that's down to their conscience and mortality"

Ive faced the issue head on too. I'm dealing with it in my own way. It's good that we are all unique and have different ways of dealing with situations we are given

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ive faced the issue head on too. I'm dealing with it in my own way. It's good that we are all unique and have different ways of dealing with situations we are given

It is indeed. Merry Xmas

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So, when I'm faced with a thread about cheating, I always think that there is another option. However, life isn't always black and white, but I do wonder how people can live with the guilt.

There are always other options, as there is with everything in life. I've chosen this option , if people don't agree then they can simply move on

Like I said, I get that life isn't black and white and people do things for their own reasons. I try not to judge.

I also think that by putting it on profiles, you at least give people the option of whether to engage with you based on your situation!

Exactly. From those I've met, not one of them has had an issue with my situation.

I wouldn't have an 'issue' with a married man as such but we are talking about our OWN morals. And in that case I'd never do it end of. I think it's wrong and humiliating"

Perhaps humiliation in the first place has led a person to take other actions. Some situations are complex.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So, when I'm faced with a thread about cheating, I always think that there is another option. However, life isn't always black and white, but I do wonder how people can live with the guilt.

There are always other options, as there is with everything in life. I've chosen this option , if people don't agree then they can simply move on

Like I said, I get that life isn't black and white and people do things for their own reasons. I try not to judge.

I also think that by putting it on profiles, you at least give people the option of whether to engage with you based on your situation!

Exactly. From those I've met, not one of them has had an issue with my situation.

I wouldn't have an 'issue' with a married man as such but we are talking about our OWN morals. And in that case I'd never do it end of. I think it's wrong and humiliating

Perhaps humiliation in the first place has led a person to take other actions. Some situations are complex."

Yes there are other factors but as I said me myself I would never do it. And I was in a mentally abusive relationship for a long time. But everyone is different so as I've said it's just my personal opinion I was very unhappy and the last thing on my mind was sex with another man.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together."

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

No need to "cheat' if you come to an agreement about sex outside the relationship. It's about treating the other person like an adult and being respectful enough to allow them to make their choice about staying in the relationship based on the full facts.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's about self-respect too, why would you want to share your life with someone you don't respect.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable ""

Agree with that - very insightful.....for us on here as a couple, swinging is a way of avoiding cheating - everything is discussed/shared/decided on together, this removes the guilt but there are still some difficult conversations to be had but it brings us closer together and helps us to understand each other's needs.

To the OP - change the situation you are in by communicating with your partner, be honest with her about your needs, if you love her - show her that you love her - m x

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By *roubleinparadise27Man over a year ago

Heathrow

So, when I'm faced with a thread about cheating, I always think that there is another option. However, life isn't always black and white, but I do wonder how people can live with the guilt.

There are always other options, as there is with everything in life. I've chosen this option , if people don't agree then they can simply move on

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By *onnor999Man over a year ago

Wrexham

haha cheating gestapo. love it

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By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

For me it's not the cheating per se, it's the proportioning blame I find distasteful and disrespectful.

Look elsewhere and get on with it, there's no need to blame your spouse in the process.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

To the OP - change the situation you are in by communicating with your partner, be honest with her about your needs, if you love her - show her that you love her - m x"

Communication isn't guaranteed to solve anything, trust me when I say I've exhausted communication.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"haha cheating gestapo. love it"

Always do on here, but not everyone has the wisdom and knowledge to even try to understand. Live and let live is what I say

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together.

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap."

What an absolutely ridiculous statement. Love is so much more than sex. Love and sex can be miles apart.

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By *D835Man over a year ago

London

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together.

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap.

What an absolutely ridiculous statement. Love is so much more than sex. Love and sex can be miles apart."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

To the OP - change the situation you are in by communicating with your partner, be honest with her about your needs, if you love her - show her that you love her - m x"

What is she won't even listen to his needs, or even consider anything at all....what if everything he says falls upon deaf ears? Then what?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap."

So according to this statement, you only have sex with someone you love, and you can't love someone unless you're having sex with them. Really?

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"haha cheating gestapo. love it"

Other people's relationships are their business but if they open them up for scrutiny on a public forum, without giving both sides of the story the responses will be varied.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"haha cheating gestapo. love it

Other people's relationships are their business but if they open them up for scrutiny on a public forum, without giving both sides of the story the responses will be varied. "

Very true, and it makes extremely interesting reading

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap.

So according to this statement, you only have sex with someone you love, and you can't love someone unless you're having sex with them. Really?

I'm talking about meeting their needs, whatever they may be.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

To the OP - change the situation you are in by communicating with your partner, be honest with her about your needs, if you love her - show her that you love her - m x

What is she won't even listen to his needs, or even consider anything at all....what if everything he says falls upon deaf ears? Then what?"

Then he can stop deluding himself that there's love there.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bottom line, people tell themselves whatever they need to justify what they want to do. As is their choice.

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By *uckandbunnyCouple over a year ago

In your bed

We went through a dry spell sex wise and it can be difficult, but I was open and discussed why it might be happening, without trying to blame anyone.

We talked it through and worked it out.

There could be many reasons. The fact she is giving you a handjob to me suggests she wants to be sexual but ain't feeling that vibe.

This could be for many reasons.

Tired due to work, kids family.

Chemical changes due to giving birth, getting older, illness etc.

A lack of intimacy, Footrubs, dates with no sex on the menu, too much porn etc

Does not find you as attractive, getting older, lack of effort to dress to impress.

She may feel unattractive, comparing herself to others, lack of self esteem, needs that reassurance.

There are many reasons, but be open and honest with her. See if it's something that you can work on together or get outside help with.

Going elsewhere solves the short term lack of sex issue but not your couple relationship and why it has changed.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap.

So according to this statement, you only have sex with someone you love, and you can't love someone unless you're having sex with them. Really?

I'm talking about meeting their needs, whatever they may be."

But you said if they have sex with you, then they don't love you !!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

To the OP - change the situation you are in by communicating with your partner, be honest with her about your needs, if you love her - show her that you love her - m x

What is she won't even listen to his needs, or even consider anything at all....what if everything he says falls upon deaf ears? Then what?

Then he can stop deluding himself that there's love there."

You obviously don't have much idea about love and relationships.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We went through a dry spell sex wise and it can be difficult, but I was open and discussed why it might be happening, without trying to blame anyone.

We talked it through and worked it out.

There could be many reasons. The fact she is giving you a handjob to me suggests she wants to be sexual but ain't feeling that vibe.

This could be for many reasons.

Tired due to work, kids family.

Chemical changes due to giving birth, getting older, illness etc.

A lack of intimacy, Footrubs, dates with no sex on the menu, too much porn etc

Does not find you as attractive, getting older, lack of effort to dress to impress.

She may feel unattractive, comparing herself to others, lack of self esteem, needs that reassurance.

There are many reasons, but be open and honest with her. See if it's something that you can work on together or get outside help with.

Going elsewhere solves the short term lack of sex issue but not your couple relationship and why it has changed."

But what if she won't listen?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

To the OP - change the situation you are in by communicating with your partner, be honest with her about your needs, if you love her - show her that you love her - m x

What is she won't even listen to his needs, or even consider anything at all....what if everything he says falls upon deaf ears? Then what?

Then he can stop deluding himself that there's love there.

You obviously don't have much idea about love and relationships."

I know people talk a lot of shit about love with nothing to back it up.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

To the OP - change the situation you are in by communicating with your partner, be honest with her about your needs, if you love her - show her that you love her - m x

What is she won't even listen to his needs, or even consider anything at all....what if everything he says falls upon deaf ears? Then what?

Then he can stop deluding himself that there's love there.

You obviously don't have much idea about love and relationships.

I know people talk a lot of shit about love with nothing to back it up. "

I won't try to explain. I understand not all people have the knowledge or wisdom. Good job we all think differently.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'll say this if you truley love somone you'd want them to be happy.

By lying to them you remove thier ability to choose and you put your happiness first.

That isnt love, it's "comfortable "

To the OP - change the situation you are in by communicating with your partner, be honest with her about your needs, if you love her - show her that you love her - m x

What is she won't even listen to his needs, or even consider anything at all....what if everything he says falls upon deaf ears? Then what?

Then he can stop deluding himself that there's love there.

You obviously don't have much idea about love and relationships.

I know people talk a lot of shit about love with nothing to back it up.

I won't try to explain. I understand not all people have the knowledge or wisdom. Good job we all think differently."

Oh I understand perfectly why people lie to a partner, because the status quo suits them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

As I said, their choice.

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By *uckandbunnyCouple over a year ago

In your bed

"We went through a dry spell sex wise and it can be difficult, but I was open and discussed why it might be happening, without trying to blame anyone.

We talked it through and worked it out.

There could be many reasons. The fact she is giving you a handjob to me suggests she wants to be sexual but ain't feeling that vibe.

This could be for many reasons.

Tired due to work, kids family.

Chemical changes due to giving birth, getting older, illness etc.

A lack of intimacy, Footrubs, dates with no sex on the menu, too much porn etc

Does not find you as attractive, getting older, lack of effort to dress to impress.

She may feel unattractive, comparing herself to others, lack of self esteem, needs that reassurance.

There are many reasons, but be open and honest with her. See if it's something that you can work on together or get outside help with.

Going elsewhere solves the short term lack of sex issue but not your couple relationship and why it has changed.

But what if she won't listen?"

As i said the fact that she is offering some sexuality is an indication of not all is lost.

Also listening is a double edge sword. He has to listen to her needs too.

Is his goal sex or mending a broken relationship?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's happened to me twice hence 2 divorces

Your only course of action is to find someone else

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We went through a dry spell sex wise and it can be difficult, but I was open and discussed why it might be happening, without trying to blame anyone.

We talked it through and worked it out.

There could be many reasons. The fact she is giving you a handjob to me suggests she wants to be sexual but ain't feeling that vibe.

This could be for many reasons.

Tired due to work, kids family.

Chemical changes due to giving birth, getting older, illness etc.

A lack of intimacy, Footrubs, dates with no sex on the menu, too much porn etc

Does not find you as attractive, getting older, lack of effort to dress to impress.

She may feel unattractive, comparing herself to others, lack of self esteem, needs that reassurance.

There are many reasons, but be open and honest with her. See if it's something that you can work on together or get outside help with.

Going elsewhere solves the short term lack of sex issue but not your couple relationship and why it has changed.

But what if she won't listen?

As i said the fact that she is offering some sexuality is an indication of not all is lost.

Also listening is a double edge sword. He has to listen to her needs too.

Is his goal sex or mending a broken relationship? "

Surely depends if there is still love in the relationship. True love can conquer all, so they say.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together.

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap.

What an absolutely ridiculous statement. Love is so much more than sex. Love and sex can be miles apart."

Of course love and sex can be miles apart , but only if both parties feel the same way . If one party goes off sex , but believes they still love the other just as much , and the other still has the desire for the other sexually , it's never going to work .

To no longer desire ones partner in a sexual way is always going to leave that person feeling unloved and worthless . So unless there is a legitimate reason for the desire to have gone ( impotence , dementia , or any other physical or emotional uncontrollable disease ) then when one no longer wants sex with ones partner it's game over . The very foundations have gone , and it's going to be a shaky future .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together.

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap.

What an absolutely ridiculous statement. Love is so much more than sex. Love and sex can be miles apart.

How can a relationship be over, because of just one issue. Whatever happened to love ???

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together.

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap.

What an absolutely ridiculous statement. Love is so much more than sex. Love and sex can be miles apart.

How can a relationship be over, because of just one issue. Whatever happened to love ???

Well my point was that love between two people that included sex , is never going to be the same when one no longer wants sex with the other .

Sex is an integral part of what love is between a couple , and when you no longer want it with that person , how can you still be in love ?

What's left without sex will be a diluted version , a compromise , and to suggest that love without the sex that both people wanted at one point is strong enough is naive in my opinion . You can't have a fulfilling relationship which included sex and desire , then take it away and expect it to be the same .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Interesting thought experiment.

If a person is cheating on thier partner without thier knowledge.

And the partner would not be with or sleep with the cheat if they knew the facts.

Is it rape by deception when they do have sex?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together.

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap.

What an absolutely ridiculous statement. Love is so much more than sex. Love and sex can be miles apart.

How can a relationship be over, because of just one issue. Whatever happened to love ???

Well it started as one issue

A sexual problem this could have maybe been worked out.

But now its multiple issues of;

cheating,

Lying,

Betrayal

And loss of trust.

Its very rare a relationship no matter how loving can withstand that mix of issues

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We have a house rule here. We make out every Sunday night whether we want to or not. After all if you don't use it, you lose it. Have met so many people where they have let old age kill their sex lives. You got to work at it to keep it going. Plus help keeps us fit, it works for us.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together.

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap.

What an absolutely ridiculous statement. Love is so much more than sex. Love and sex can be miles apart.

How can a relationship be over, because of just one issue. Whatever happened to love ???

Well it started as one issue

A sexual problem this could have maybe been worked out.

But now its multiple issues of;

cheating,

Lying,

Betrayal

And loss of trust.

Its very rare a relationship no matter how loving can withstand that mix of issues

It's also likely that the decision to refuse sex was triggered by other issues in the first place.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My husband hasn't touched me for 4 years. For the two years previous it was 2 mins of doggy once a month (his choice-not mine). Now, I love him like no other, he's a great father to our children and otherwise a great husband too, but I have needs. I need to be touched, kissed and held. What do I do? I get that from others whilst carrying on as normal at home. Why rip the family apart because I need sex but he doesn't?!?

Yes I've poured my heart out to him, have had the 'chat' and admitted to sleeping with others. I don't tell him 'oh by the way I'm opening my legs later on for some stranger' but I have told him. He was angry and hurt, but hasn't mentioned it again. We get on ok. Go on holiday, have nights out etc...... I'm not leaving and he has a choice.....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 26/12/16 13:32:47]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"My husband hasn't touched me for 4 years. For the two years previous it was 2 mins of doggy once a month (his choice-not mine). Now, I love him like no other, he's a great father to our children and otherwise a great husband too, but I have needs. I need to be touched, kissed and held. What do I do? I get that from others whilst carrying on as normal at home. Why rip the family apart because I need sex but he doesn't?!?

According to the girls here, it must be your fault, or is it only men who are indited for their partners cheating?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

According to the girls here, it must be your fault, or is it only men who are indited for their partners cheating?"

Everyone has an opinion, pisses me off though when some reckon that cheating means no love. Don't try tell me I don't love my husband please. Thank you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

According to the girls here, it must be your fault, or is it only men who are indited for their partners cheating?

Everyone has an opinion, pisses me off though when some reckon that cheating means no love. Don't try tell me I don't love my husband please. Thank you

Obviously not enough not to be on a fuck site during Christmas..Love without commitment is nothing.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

According to the girls here, it must be your fault, or is it only men who are indited for their partners cheating?

Everyone has an opinion, pisses me off though when some reckon that cheating means no love. Don't try tell me I don't love my husband please. Thank you

Obviously not enough not to be on a fuck site during Christmas..Love without commitment is nothing. "

I love him enough to not leave him. Merry Christmas

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

According to the girls here, it must be your fault, or is it only men who are indited for their partners cheating?

Everyone has an opinion, pisses me off though when some reckon that cheating means no love. Don't try tell me I don't love my husband please. Thank you

Obviously not enough not to be on a fuck site during Christmas..Love without commitment is nothing.

I love him enough to not leave him. Merry Christmas "

He's also out on the drink - possibly meeting up with a one of the ladies he was fucking whilst I was pregnant! Two sides to every story. Don't judge.

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By *ust PeachyWoman over a year ago

Prestonish

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

I was in a relationship like that for years! My ex had a very low sex drive and I felt like a pervert practically begging him for sex! It really does affect your self esteem and self worth!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My had to watch porn to get horny and then take viagra's to stay hard

I was frustrated for years

Then the cheating didn't help to make me want to be with him

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For me sex is the glue that binds you together. I couldn't stay with someone that wouldn't be inside and close to me in a physical way

I thought it was love that keeps people together.

Yes, and if they don't want to meet your needs (physical incapability aside), they don't love you. Love is an action, talk is cheap.

What an absolutely ridiculous statement. Love is so much more than sex. Love and sex can be miles apart.

How can a relationship be over, because of just one issue. Whatever happened to love ???

Well my point was that love between two people that included sex , is never going to be the same when one no longer wants sex with the other .

Sex is an integral part of what love is between a couple , and when you no longer want it with that person , how can you still be in love ?

But at the end of the day, love is a strong bond that can still exist, with or without sex.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

I was in a relationship like that for years! My ex had a very low sex drive and I felt like a pervert practically begging him for sex! It really does affect your self esteem and self worth!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

According to the girls here, it must be your fault, or is it only men who are indited for their partners cheating?

Everyone has an opinion, pisses me off though when some reckon that cheating means no love. Don't try tell me I don't love my husband please. Thank you

Obviously not enough not to be on a fuck site during Christmas..Love without commitment is nothing.

I love him enough to not leave him. Merry Christmas

He's also out on the drink - possibly meeting up with a one of the ladies he was fucking whilst I was pregnant! Two sides to every story. Don't judge. "

A lot of the people who judge on here obviously arent wise or knowledgeable enough to understand that there are two sides to every story. Don't let the narrow minded people get to you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How many others have found their partners have pretty much lost interest in sex???? My wife has, she will wank me off only of I ask though which is pretty humiliating.

Any others in the same boat???

Yes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I admire you for posting all of this on a forum and I can sympathise with your situation. Like I keep saying over and over, nothing is ever black and white, as you very well know. Those who think it is obviously haven't had difficult situations to deal with, or they would at least try to be more understanding.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple over a year ago

Halifax

It doesnt make us narrow minded etc just because we dont agree with what you do.

Like others have said,its the blaming or bitching about the wife or husband that we find distasteful.People have their reasons for being here sure,but constantly justifying it is what I think gets peoples backs up.

Miss

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 26/12/16 15:15:49]

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple over a year ago

Halifax

"It doesnt make us narrow minded etc just because we dont agree with what you do.

Miss

I haven't bitched about or blamed anyone. Ive simply opened a forum up about what others do when communication fails. If people don't like it, they don't have to comment. Live and let live

We dont but we can if we want to,you constant start these type of threads and imply we have no wisdom or knowledge ,just because we disagree with you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Tit for tat passive aggression, that ain't love.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Tit for tat passive aggression, that ain't love.

20 years I've been with my husband. Tit for tat? It surely isn't a game. Don't you think I (personally) miss the closeness we once had? People who tell me 'it ain't love' have no idea! Real love keeps me there.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Tit for tat passive aggression, that ain't love.

Despite the fact that his actions are hurting you and yours him. Apathy, habit, fear, financial security, social status, all these things keep people in relationships too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Only your partner can decide whether they feel loved.

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By *urvymamaWoman over a year ago

Doncaster

If you aren't getting it there's a problem, be that hers, yours or in your relationship.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 26/12/16 16:05:06]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Only your partner can decide whether they feel loved."

I've been honest to him. I told him. He decided to stay. I am staying, not for money (I have my own), just feel what's the point I'm ripping my family apart because I enjoy and need sex.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Only your partner can decide whether they feel loved."

I never said if he feels loved. I love him though, he has a choice. Leave me, start fucking me or put up with it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Only your partner can decide whether they feel loved.

I've been honest to him. I told him. He decided to stay. I am staying, not for money (I have my own), just feel what's the point I'm ripping my family apart because I enjoy and need sex. "

Then that's your choice too, you're both adults, you've made your choices, just don't pretend it's something it is not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Being really open and let him know how you really feel is the only answer either for the good or the bad at least you know where you both stand

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Only your partner can decide whether they feel loved.

I've been honest to him. I told him. He decided to stay. I am staying, not for money (I have my own), just feel what's the point I'm ripping my family apart because I enjoy and need sex.

Then that's your choice too, you're both adults, you've made your choices, just don't pretend it's something it is not."

I'm pretending nothing. I want/need sex, kisses and cuddles. I can get all of that by cheating, whilst I can also have a family life with my husband and kids.

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By *osieWoman over a year ago

Wembley

"Love these replies:

When it's the bloke. Fuck him, it's his fault for being a cheating twat on a site that is stupidly hard to meet on anyway. "

Nah; both are liars and cheaters

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Being really open and let him know how you really feel is the only answer either for the good or the bad at least you know where you both stand

I have been. He's cheated all of our married life (20 years), I have for 3 years. So what, we get sex from others. He knows, I know. Of course it would be ideal if we were like 'the way it should be'. But it isn't. What will be will be.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Only your partner can decide whether they feel loved.

I've been honest to him. I told him. He decided to stay. I am staying, not for money (I have my own), just feel what's the point I'm ripping my family apart because I enjoy and need sex.

Then that's your choice too, you're both adults, you've made your choices, just don't pretend it's something it is not.

I'm pretending nothing. I want/need sex, kisses and cuddles. I can get all of that by cheating, whilst I can also have a family life with my husbarnd and kids. "

You're pretending to love him. But whatever, your life, your choices.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Only your partner can decide whether they feel loved.

I've been honest to him. I told him. He decided to stay. I am staying, not for money (I have my own), just feel what's the point I'm ripping my family apart because I enjoy and need sex.

Then that's your choice too, you're both adults, you've made your choices, just don't pretend it's something it is not.

I'm pretending nothing. I want/need sex, kisses and cuddles. I can get all of that by cheating, whilst I can also have a family life with my husbarnd and kids.

You're pretending to love him. But whatever, your life, your choices."

I'm not. That's just the way your mind works. Insecure maybe?

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By *uckandbunnyCouple over a year ago

In your bed

"Being really open and let him know how you really feel is the only answer either for the good or the bad at least you know where you both stand

Well if you both know then it's honest at least. Which I would not classify as cheating.

It maybe unconventional and I may not get it, but at least it's not behind each others back.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It doesnt make us narrow minded etc just because we dont agree with what you do.

Miss

I haven't bitched about or blamed anyone. Ive simply opened a forum up about what others do when communication fails. If people don't like it, they don't have to comment. Live and let live

We dont but we can if we want to,you constant start these type of threads and imply we have no wisdom or knowledge ,just because we disagree with you."

Of course you can comment, it's all good. That's why I start threads. I thoroughly enjoy them. And I simply imply things as they come across to me.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Lol

Like I said before cheaters are always so defensive!

It must be exhausting trying to justify your behavior all the time and bleat on about it being no one else's business whilst flaunting it on a public forum.

If you don't want anyone to disagree with you then keep your mouth shut and continue lying to your partner discretely!

I have been in a situation of lying to a partner about someone I had met.

And it felt shit!

I don't know how you live with yourselves.

And before you say it yes I am judging you!

If you don't like it then don;t publicly brag that you're fucking strangers behind your partners back!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Lol

Like I said before cheaters are always so defensive!

It must be exhausting trying to justify your behavior all the time and bleat on about it being no one else's business whilst flaunting it on a public forum.

If you don't want anyone to disagree with you then keep your mouth shut and continue lying to your partner discretely!

I have been in a situation of lying to a partner about someone I had met.

And it felt shit!

I don't know how you live with yourselves.

And before you say it yes I am judging you!

If you don't like it then don;t publicly brag that you're fucking strangers behind your partners back!

Touché lol please don't let these forums get to you. It's all meant to be fun.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Lol

Like I said before cheaters are always so defensive!

It must be exhausting trying to justify your behavior all the time and bleat on about it being no one else's business whilst flaunting it on a public forum.

If you don't want anyone to disagree with you then keep your mouth shut and continue lying to your partner discretely!

I have been in a situation of lying to a partner about someone I had met.

And it felt shit!

I don't know how you live with yourselves.

And before you say it yes I am judging you!

If you don't like it then don;t publicly brag that you're fucking strangers behind your partners back!

I kind of live with myself the same way as you did whilst you were cheating.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Love these replies:

When it's the bloke. Fuck him, it's his fault for being a cheating twat on a site that is stupidly hard to meet on anyway. "

Typical Fab.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Lol

Like I said before cheaters are always so defensive!

It must be exhausting trying to justify your behavior all the time and bleat on about it being no one else's business whilst flaunting it on a public forum.

If you don't want anyone to disagree with you then keep your mouth shut and continue lying to your partner discretely!

I have been in a situation of lying to a partner about someone I had met.

And it felt shit!

I don't know how you live with yourselves.

And before you say it yes I am judging you!

If you don't like it then don;t publicly brag that you're fucking strangers behind your partners back!

I kind of live with myself the same way as you did whilst you were cheating.

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By *harpDressed ManMan over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

[Removed by poster at 28/12/16 08:22:50]

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