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Ladies! how long did it take?
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My hubby likes to watch me shag other men. The sluttier the better. I have permission to go off and do what I please. As long as I tell him details. It's been a couple of years. But I think I'm starting to get my head round it. It didn't feel right to me at first. I felt like I was cheating. But he has endlessly assured me it's fine. It's an odd feeling, but I think it's made me more confident and sexual.
Ladies how long did it take you to go from faithful wife to this lifestyle.?
How did it change you as a person, in the way you think? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ladies how long did it take you to go from faithful wife to this lifestyle."
Hi, if you are abiding by hubby's wishes then you are still a faithful wife We've only been swinging for a few months and it still feels a little 'wrong' to be enjoying other people.....but it's so bloody hot!! I've become a little more confident, a lot more horny & our sex life is awesome  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP strangely enough most swingers I know are totally faithful to their other halves simply because why would some go looking for variety when they already have it?
When it's done properly swinging can be the most bonding thing a couple can do. But it depends how you're wired. Some people can do it some can't.
It sounds like he's very supportive and you're in good hands. Enjoy your new hobby  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm still faithful. Now we do this together there's absolutely no reason why either of us would feel the need to be anything other than faithful. What better way to be able to have sex with others when your other half is right by your side. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm still faithful. Now we do this together there's absolutely no reason why either of us would feel the need to be anything other than faithful. What better way to be able to have sex with others when your other half is right by your side. "
  exactly this xx |
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My husbands a lot older than me he offered to pay for a male escort for my birthday about 8 years ago only i couldnt find one i liked, i suggested looking online instead. I kept saying to him are you sure its ok and will you still love me and still do sometimes just in case he has changed his mind. I havnt really changed im still the same person. |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
We chose to do this together so we don't see this as being unfaithful or cheating. We agreed boundaries when we first started such as only meeting other together. If one of us was to meet separately we would consider that as cheating |
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I do this and don't consider it cheating. It was his idea for me to do it, and I took some persuading!
I stick to his "rules" (his wishes of what I can do and can't do out of respect for him) and always double check everything with him and talk to him about any concerns I have about anyone I meet (e.g. if they message me asking to meet without my husband's knowledge).
I started a couple of years ago but not met many, I'm quite picky. |
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Thank you. You've all said really lovely things.
I think I may have accident muddled you all by not being clear enough. You see, we've been swinging for years together a couple, we've had various threesomes,foursomes and moresomes. I completely get what you say about being faithful and swinging. I feel the same. But this time it's different. He wants me to go out into the world chatting guys up and then doing what ever I like. Just like a single woman. Which I'm starting to get a grip of. But it's very odd. Normally i don't even flirt unless I'm with him. It takes some getting used to, I'll tell you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm still faithful. Now we do this together there's absolutely no reason why either of us would feel the need to be anything other than faithful. What better way to be able to have sex with others when your other half is right by your side. "
 this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My other half moans at me because I don't play away enough lol
We talk about stuff all the time and if ever I do play away it's always with his
Consent as he loves me to come home and talk him through EXACTLY what happened, he loves it
I once had a meet at the house whilst he was away on a lads holiday, I phoned him during sex, best feeling he's ever had he said  |
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"Thank you. You've all said really lovely things.
I think I may have accident muddled you all by not being clear enough. You see, we've been swinging for years together a couple, we've had various threesomes,foursomes and moresomes. I completely get what you say about being faithful and swinging. I feel the same. But this time it's different. He wants me to go out into the world chatting guys up and then doing what ever I like. Just like a single woman. Which I'm starting to get a grip of. But it's very odd. Normally i don't even flirt unless I'm with him. It takes some getting used to, I'll tell you."
My fella would like me to too & I can't get my head round it yet.
What does he get from that?
I'm the same, don't even flirt much normally. This lifestyle takes some getting used to! x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you. You've all said really lovely things.
I think I may have accident muddled you all by not being clear enough. You see, we've been swinging for years together a couple, we've had various threesomes,foursomes and moresomes. I completely get what you say about being faithful and swinging. I feel the same. But this time it's different. He wants me to go out into the world chatting guys up and then doing what ever I like. Just like a single woman. Which I'm starting to get a grip of. But it's very odd. Normally i don't even flirt unless I'm with him. It takes some getting used to, I'll tell you.
My fella would like me to too & I can't get my head round it yet.
What does he get from that?
I'm the same, don't even flirt much normally. This lifestyle takes some getting used to! x"
Have you asked him about it?
I enjoy my wife flirting with others and meeting on her own, so I can only give my individual perspective. |
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"Thank you. You've all said really lovely things.
I think I may have accident muddled you all by not being clear enough. You see, we've been swinging for years together a couple, we've had various threesomes,foursomes and moresomes. I completely get what you say about being faithful and swinging. I feel the same. But this time it's different. He wants me to go out into the world chatting guys up and then doing what ever I like. Just like a single woman. Which I'm starting to get a grip of. But it's very odd. Normally i don't even flirt unless I'm with him. It takes some getting used to, I'll tell you.
My fella would like me to too & I can't get my head round it yet.
What does he get from that?
I'm the same, don't even flirt much normally. This lifestyle takes some getting used to! x
Have you asked him about it?
I enjoy my wife flirting with others and meeting on her own, so I can only give my individual perspective. "
Yes he says he gets off on it when he knows I'm out & when I tell him about it as we play once I'm home.
But as Id not feel the same, I just don't get it. Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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5 years in and it still messes with my mind. Both of us still have wobbles and i think that's natural. The best advice i could give is talk about things openly. I've found that hubby is comfortable with something one week and then in a few months time he might change his mind. It's a complicated mix of emotions so I'd be surprised if anyone found it easy all the time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you. You've all said really lovely things.
I think I may have accident muddled you all by not being clear enough. You see, we've been swinging for years together a couple, we've had various threesomes,foursomes and moresomes. I completely get what you say about being faithful and swinging. I feel the same. But this time it's different. He wants me to go out into the world chatting guys up and then doing what ever I like. Just like a single woman. Which I'm starting to get a grip of. But it's very odd. Normally i don't even flirt unless I'm with him. It takes some getting used to, I'll tell you.
My fella would like me to too & I can't get my head round it yet.
What does he get from that?
I'm the same, don't even flirt much normally. This lifestyle takes some getting used to! x
Have you asked him about it?
I enjoy my wife flirting with others and meeting on her own, so I can only give my individual perspective.
Yes he says he gets off on it when he knows I'm out & when I tell him about it as we play once I'm home.
But as Id not feel the same, I just don't get it. Lol"
.
Just give it a try, you have nothing to lose if you have his permission |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
My fella would like me to too & I can't get my head round it yet.
What does he get from that?
I'm the same, don't even flirt much normally. This lifestyle takes some getting used to! x
Have you asked him about it?
I enjoy my wife flirting with others and meeting on her own, so I can only give my individual perspective.
Yes he says he gets off on it when he knows I'm out & when I tell him about it as we play once I'm home.
But as Id not feel the same, I just don't get it. Lol"
Do you enjoy the flirting when you're out on your own, and his reaction to it? If you don't mind me saying. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"5 years in and it still messes with my mind. Both of us still have wobbles and i think that's natural. The best advice i could give is talk about things openly. I've found that hubby is comfortable with something one week and then in a few months time he might change his mind. It's a complicated mix of emotions so I'd be surprised if anyone found it easy all the time. "
This is good to hear- thanks for your honesty.
I think it's a constantly evolving thing? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"5 years in and it still messes with my mind. Both of us still have wobbles and i think that's natural. The best advice i could give is talk about things openly. I've found that hubby is comfortable with something one week and then in a few months time he might change his mind. It's a complicated mix of emotions so I'd be surprised if anyone found it easy all the time.
This is good to hear- thanks for your honesty.
I think it's a constantly evolving thing?"
It absolutely is. And what we are looking for changes as does hubby's level of involvement. It's hard to balance at times but when we get it right it's amazing. I don't meet many so that removes any pressure on either of us and i only meet if we are both totally into it. That's how it works best for us. |
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"
My fella would like me to too & I can't get my head round it yet.
What does he get from that?
I'm the same, don't even flirt much normally. This lifestyle takes some getting used to! x
Have you asked him about it?
I enjoy my wife flirting with others and meeting on her own, so I can only give my individual perspective.
Yes he says he gets off on it when he knows I'm out & when I tell him about it as we play once I'm home.
But as Id not feel the same, I just don't get it. Lol
Do you enjoy the flirting when you're out on your own, and his reaction to it? If you don't mind me saying. "
Yes I enjoy flirting in general. I don't really do it in front of him. But when he reads messages I've sent to others it gets him going. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"5 years in and it still messes with my mind. Both of us still have wobbles and i think that's natural. The best advice i could give is talk about things openly. I've found that hubby is comfortable with something one week and then in a few months time he might change his mind. It's a complicated mix of emotions so I'd be surprised if anyone found it easy all the time.
This is good to hear- thanks for your honesty.
I think it's a constantly evolving thing?"
I also appreciate Scarlet Seductions honesty, it's refreshing to see it here on the forums.
We've found constantly communicating with each other is key, and not making any assumptions.
Yes for some it's constantly evolving, we'd put ourselves in that category. People would be surprised how much our swinging interests and preferences have changed over the years. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"5 years in and it still messes with my mind. Both of us still have wobbles and i think that's natural. The best advice i could give is talk about things openly. I've found that hubby is comfortable with something one week and then in a few months time he might change his mind. It's a complicated mix of emotions so I'd be surprised if anyone found it easy all the time. "
totally agree
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"this is e xcactly what my my hubby wants from me to x"
Have you done anything yet?
I agree wholeheartedly with the comments here. Communication is key, and honesty. We talk about it all the time.
I've got my very first meet with a man off here next week. It's just a social. I'll be on my own. It's going to be the weirdest thing for me. I'm so used to me and hubby being together. Wish me luck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"this is e xcactly what my my hubby wants from me to x
Have you done anything yet?
I agree wholeheartedly with the comments here. Communication is key, and honesty. We talk about it all the time.
I've got my very first meet with a man off here next week. It's just a social. I'll be on my own. It's going to be the weirdest thing for me. I'm so used to me and hubby being together. Wish me luck. "
Good luck!! We started off meeting socially as a couple then, due to struggling to get sitters, hubby said I could go to socials alone (as I'm the chatty one?!) petrified me the first time not being with him!! Ive been in a few now and it's evolved in to hubby sending me dares to do while I'm out!! I always tell the guys I'm meeting what's happening though as it adds to the fun. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you. You've all said really lovely things.
I think I may have accident muddled you all by not being clear enough. You see, we've been swinging for years together a couple, we've had various threesomes,foursomes and moresomes. I completely get what you say about being faithful and swinging. I feel the same. But this time it's different. He wants me to go out into the world chatting guys up and then doing what ever I like. Just like a single woman. Which I'm starting to get a grip of. But it's very odd. Normally i don't even flirt unless I'm with him. It takes some getting used to, I'll tell you."
Dave wants me to do the same, I enjoy us swinging together, be it with couple or singles, but to play as a single woman flirting when out alone is intriguing but so different, as you say, takes getting used to |
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Wish me luck.
Good luck!! We started off meeting socially as a couple then, due to struggling to get sitters, hubby said I could go to socials alone (as I'm the chatty one?!) petrified me the first time not being with him!! Ive been in a few now and it's evolved in to hubby sending me dares to do while I'm out!! I always tell the guys I'm meeting what's happening though as it adds to the fun. "
Dares!!! What a great idea. My hubby is going to love that. Thanks x |
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"
Dave wants me to do the same, I enjoy us swinging together, be it with couple or singles, but to play as a single woman flirting when out alone is intriguing but so different, as you say, takes getting used to"
Sure does. Have you been out on your own yet?. How was it? |
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My fella would like me to too & I can't get my head round it yet.
What does he get from that?
I'm the same, don't even flirt much normally. This lifestyle takes some getting used to! x"
From the mans point of view it's a strange mix of emotions , we get some pride that our wife/partner is wanted by others , jealousy can add to the sexual tension ( in moderation of course), you have the whole fantasy side of things ( during their meet imagining what they are doing ) then the recount of the event in a sexually charged way , personally nothing turns me on more than knowing my partner is enjoying herself  |
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our first time i arranged it mr and she agreed and wanted to do it and no pressure from me at all, it was great and she enjoyed it and still enjoys it now. It adds to our sex lives of course from mans point of view many emotions but you have to try and forget yes its not normal in the vanilla world and thats probably what your still thinking but this isnt the vanilla world is it. Love and trust is a great thing and we believe it has only made us closer . (not that we were not close but youl understand). All the hubbys will love hearing about it and getting pictures. Its not so much cuckold senario for us its not in terms of bulls but its more a hotwife scenario. Big plus is easier for us too as fits around our home lives not very easy for us both to be out together due children so its a bonus when she comes home and have lots of fantastic sex.x |
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