We are also poly and both had other bf/gf although neither lived with us. We would be open to that if someone came along who we felt it would work with though. We do know some people living as a triad - 2 males and 1 female - and it works very well for them. |
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"We are also poly and both had other bf/gf although neither lived with us. We would be open to that if someone came along who we felt it would work with though. We do know some people living as a triad - 2 males and 1 female - and it works very well for them. "
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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago
in the eye of the storm |
"To clarify anyone who swings is polyamorous. Polyamorous is having more than one sexuality partner at the same time with everyone involved knowing.
We have a girlfriend
MrsSB  "
That's the bed hopping definition which is apt for a lot of swingers who just want the uncomplicated sex ,
But I view true Polyamorous as being a emotional as well as sexually for filling relationship involving more that one relationship partner . |
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"To clarify anyone who swings is polyamorous. Polyamorous is having more than one sexuality partner at the same time with everyone involved knowing.
We have a girlfriend
MrsSB
That's the bed hopping definition which is apt for a lot of swingers who just want the uncomplicated sex ,
But I view true Polyamorous as being a emotional as well as sexually for filling relationship involving more that one relationship partner ."
Have you experience it?  |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
Yes, whilst I was at uni I lived with four girls, two of whom I was in a relationship with. And we would go out and fuck other people or bring them back. It was never really an issue as we had already agreed boundaries and what we were comfortable with. Sadly with the pressure of completing our Masters and real life issues it only worked for around a year but it was a lot of fun whilst it did. |
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"As swingers, we are polyamorous. But has anyone had a polyamorous relationship that involved living with more than one partner?
MrsSB "
Swinging is not necessarily polyamourous.
In fact, I would say that most swinging is not polyamourous at all , since the majority of swinging is multiple sex partners with no relationship or long term relationship.
Polyamoury is having several long term concurrent partners, with those partnerships involving a relationship of some description.
My version of polyamory is to have 3 long term female friends/ lovers, ( each of which have two or more long term lovers). All of this network know about each other, though none of us live with each other, and we only meet as one to ones, there is no threesomes or group sex involved at any stage.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To clarify anyone who swings is polyamorous. Polyamorous is having more than one sexuality partner at the same time with everyone involved knowing.
We have a girlfriend
MrsSB "
People use the term poly in many ways and interepret it how it best suits them.
We definitely would not class ourselves as poly we are members of lots of poly groups and the vast majority do not recognise swingers as being poly it is a form of non magnogomy true, but for us poly relationships are far more than just sexually motivated. There should be a emotional connection and have elements of a traditional relationships with all partners, not just be exclusively for sexual gratification. That said it matters not whether others swingers identify as poly it's all a personal thing. |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
I think overall we would be more happy with the "girlfriend" someone who's more than just a "turn up & fuck".
When H was in her relationships she stayed weekends with them but outsiders where not brought into it.
We'd be looking more along Meli's scenario "No hangups" free to play with others but something a bit more involved between us and them..
Scares a lot of ladies off does that, but then most assume we will want them to immediately become "The one" and that's something you work at, might happen, might not, its up to us all to decide what we want & how involved we want it to get.
S |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To clarify anyone who swings is polyamorous."
Not at all, I'm with _andsonjohn on this one. Both swinging and polyamory are types of non-monogamy, more specifically different ways of doing open relationships. There is overlap of course - but if there is no romance or a healthy dose of emotional availability/openness (I hesitate to say attachment), it is not polyamory.
Back to the question, moving in together is something that keeps coming up in my poly family but so far we keep deciding against it. The main reason being that my partners' places are an escape from the family grind. It gives everyone more options, we can do socialising and have family time at one place and adult time in another.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a long term housemate (girl) who I had known for years and we would sleep together when we were both single and then still if we were just casually seeing someone. I have had open relationships as with her and whoever I was seeing at the time, both parties knew. I've never lived with both though. |
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"I think overall we would be more happy with the "girlfriend" someone who's more than just a "turn up & fuck".
When H was in her relationships she stayed weekends with them but outsiders where not brought into it.'
We'd be looking more along Meli's scenario "No hangups" free to play with others but something a bit more involved between us and them..
Scares a lot of ladies off does that, but then most assume we will want them to immediately become "The one" and that's something you work at, might happen, might not, its up to us all to decide what we want & how involved we want it to get.
S"
Sounds a good plan to me too, I would like something more than a one off, male or female..
Amy |
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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago
in the eye of the storm |
"To clarify anyone who swings is polyamorous. Polyamorous is having more than one sexuality partner at the same time with everyone involved knowing.
We have a girlfriend
MrsSB
People use the term poly in many ways and interepret it how it best suits them.
We definitely would not class ourselves as poly we are members of lots of poly groups and the vast majority do not recognise swingers as being poly it is a form of non magnogomy true, but for us poly relationships are far more than just sexually motivated. There should be a emotional connection and have elements of a traditional relationships with all partners, not just be exclusively for sexual gratification. That said it matters not whether others swingers identify as poly it's all a personal thing. "
this is true for me poly is unconditional emotional intertwining of a person with more than one person . its not such about sexual gratification for me such relationship bare all the hallmarks of what they swinging world as a whole shy away from .
commitment with in boundaries true intimacy yes love.
think dating romance true giving its not a using relationship that so much about the swinging scene seems to be about you know sex based on physical lust no emotions involved .
its about giving emotional support and strength to another freely with out conditions attached and receiving the same in return .
poly relationship in my book are first and foremost emotional relationships based around true intimacy ,sex yes but think the kind of sex you have with someone you love .such sex offers a higher high than a hook up that's how the sex is in a poly dynamic it comes with emotions that heighten the sexual high . |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
"To clarify anyone who swings is polyamorous. Polyamorous is having more than one sexuality partner at the same time with everyone involved knowing.
We have a girlfriend
MrsSB
People use the term poly in many ways and interepret it how it best suits them.
We definitely would not class ourselves as poly we are members of lots of poly groups and the vast majority do not recognise swingers as being poly it is a form of non magnogomy true, but for us poly relationships are far more than just sexually motivated. There should be a emotional connection and have elements of a traditional relationships with all partners, not just be exclusively for sexual gratification. That said it matters not whether others swingers identify as poly it's all a personal thing.
this is true for me poly is unconditional emotional intertwining of a person with more than one person . its not such about sexual gratification for me such relationship bare all the hallmarks of what they swinging world as a whole shy away from .
commitment with in boundaries true intimacy yes love.
think dating romance true giving its not a using relationship that so much about the swinging scene seems to be about you know sex based on physical lust no emotions involved .
its about giving emotional support and strength to another freely with out conditions attached and receiving the same in return .
poly relationship in my book are first and foremost emotional relationships based around true intimacy ,sex yes but think the kind of sex you have with someone you love .such sex offers a higher high than a hook up that's how the sex is in a poly dynamic it comes with emotions that heighten the sexual high . "
Put another way would you want that someone around even if on occasion sex was off the menu to wine, dine, date & do other stuff with. Just to be in their company.
If yes I'd say you are in a poly relationship if no then its still fwb's.
A simple take on it I grant you..
S |
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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago
in the eye of the storm |
"To clarify anyone who swings is polyamorous. Polyamorous is having more than one sexuality partner at the same time with everyone involved knowing.
We have a girlfriend
MrsSB
People use the term poly in many ways and interepret it how it best suits them.
We definitely would not class ourselves as poly we are members of lots of poly groups and the vast majority do not recognise swingers as being poly it is a form of non magnogomy true, but for us poly relationships are far more than just sexually motivated. There should be a emotional connection and have elements of a traditional relationships with all partners, not just be exclusively for sexual gratification. That said it matters not whether others swingers identify as poly it's all a personal thing.
this is true for me poly is unconditional emotional intertwining of a person with more than one person . its not such about sexual gratification for me such relationship bare all the hallmarks of what they swinging world as a whole shy away from .
commitment with in boundaries true intimacy yes love.
think dating romance true giving its not a using relationship that so much about the swinging scene seems to be about you know sex based on physical lust no emotions involved .
its about giving emotional support and strength to another freely with out conditions attached and receiving the same in return .
poly relationship in my book are first and foremost emotional relationships based around true intimacy ,sex yes but think the kind of sex you have with someone you love .such sex offers a higher high than a hook up that's how the sex is in a poly dynamic it comes with emotions that heighten the sexual high .
Put another way would you want that someone around even if on occasion sex was off the menu to wine, dine, date & do other stuff with. Just to be in their company.
If yes I'd say you are in a poly relationship if no then its still fwb's.
A simple take on it I grant you..
S"
correct you will do things together that don't involve sex although sex is a very important part of the relationship its is not the only reason the relationship exists .
the relationship exists like all relationships exist they give us support and strength to deal with the emotional cost of being a feeling sharing human being , when we are down things are not going our way our poly relationships can give us support strength which helps us to carry on and deal with what life has thrown at us . everything a normal loving relationship gives us except we have a network of caring committed lovers to draw strength from on the occasions we need to and in return the have us to draw strength from if they need to .
I would drop everything if a lover needed me as its a commitment they and there wellbeing come first above mine always and I can honestly say all my lovers free they same way they would put my needs ahead of there own .
that unconditional love people commitment its how we are truly designed to exist in my opinion .
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"To clarify anyone who swings is polyamorous.
Not at all, I'm with _andsonjohn on this one. Both swinging and polyamory are types of non-monogamy, more specifically different ways of doing open relationships. There is overlap of course - but if there is no romance or a healthy dose of emotional availability/openness (I hesitate to say attachment), it is not polyamory.
Back to the question, moving in together is something that keeps coming up in my poly family but so far we keep deciding against it. The main reason being that my partners' places are an escape from the family grind. It gives everyone more options, we can do socialising and have family time at one place and adult time in another.
"
Also in agreement with both above. We're pretty fluid - we meet people for NSA sex so we swing but we've also had meaningful, romantic relationships with others, that for us is the poly part. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a Poly relationship with 2 girls of 22 and 18 where all parties knew everything when I was about 22 and at Uni in Hull. Though I don't know if the term "polyamorous" existed then, I'd certainly never heard of it, but that's what it was as we were all emotionally involved.
None of us lived together, but frequently either of the girls would stop at mine or I at theirs. It was great as there was no jealousy and it involved a lot more than sex as we'd go on nights out, for meals, or just hang out, cuddle up etc as regular couples do and we did all care for each other.
All of us were also free to sleep with others if we chose.
Though as far as sex went both girls were straight so they didn't do anything on that front with each other, but they did enjoy hanging out with each other like best mates instead.
We didn't flaunt our trio-relationship, but if anyone asked we were certainly upfront about it. Reactions went from just accepting, some admiring and a fair amount of head-scratching disbelief. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As it happens. Me and my partner was in a poly relationship. She was seeing this guy as a fb for extra fun and as the weeks went by they turned I to months, they ended up 'seeing each other' out for meals' cinema pubs etc. Sometimes she'd be away all weekend. In a way it made us stronger.
After 9 months he's called it off cos he's started seeing someone else where he doesn't need to 'lie liw' so to speak as that was getting to him.
Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes, in a triad at the moment. They live together as been together for around six years whereas I am fairly new to the relationship and hit about to hit three months with them. Whether we all live under one roof in future remains to be seen. But right now we are all happy this way |
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