FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Single Guys Lack of Effort with Dress Code
Single Guys Lack of Effort with Dress Code
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I was in a club a few Saturday's ago and every woman with out exception had clearly taken a lot of time and effort with their dress and appearance, and to be fair most of men accompanying them had made a similar effort also.
So why is it the majority of single men think it's ok to wear trainer type shoes, jeans and a t-shirt or at best a polo shirt.
Come on guys, Shoes, Trousers and a nice Shirt is surely not to much to ask on a Saturday night.
The t-shirts and trainers look just detracts from any sexy atmosphere created by any club and the well dressed sexy couples.
Do everybody a favour guys and keep the casual clobber for the pub ect. |
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I am not keen on guys suited up, to be honest, but something fitting not too casual, I agree. I like someone to look natural and normal but not overdressed. Same for the women, not a fan of trussed up women either ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you attend a Wet club, and you decide to go into the non clothed areas, you are faced with scrunching your best clothes into very small lockers...so I tend to go more casual than I would probably like to... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I won't go to a club with what I feel to be a stuffy dress code. Nothing wrong with smart casual. A poorly fitting cheap suit can look pretty scruffy too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Most of the clubs I go to have a dress code and that wouldn't be acceptable.
I always make an effort to dress up and like the people I meet to have put the effort in too  |
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By *not69Man
over a year ago
Lancashire |
It friends what club I'm going too, if I'm going to be dressed down straight away I'll make some effort coz you never know who you'll meet in the queue. But if the club isn't dress down straight away I will put more thought into it xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'd much prefer a single man who felt comfortable and relaxed wearing jeans and a T-shirt than someone who felt awkward and uncomfortable in trousers and a shirt.
It's the person I'm interested in, not what they're wearing. |
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I think smart casual can look very sexy indeed, and that includes decent jeans for me. But completely agree re: trainers and t-shirts ... it pees me off that *some* (not all) men turn up at (some) clubs looking like they've rolled in straight from work or an afternoon down the pub yet a good proportion of those will be hoping to get intimate. Sure - they may be absolutely fresh and clean beneath but I'm more likely to be drawn to someone who's made an obvious effort with how they're dressed as opposed to someone who's made little or no effort as I can't help wondering what other corners they've cut and how long it is since they've showered!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd much prefer a single man who felt comfortable and relaxed wearing jeans and a T-shirt than someone who felt awkward and uncomfortable in trousers and a shirt.
It's the person I'm interested in, not what they're wearing."
I hate suits, I only own one for occasional work use and even then I try to combine it with casual (polo shirt instead of dress shirt)
I'm at my most relaxed when I'm not forced into wearing something just to conform to some arbitrary standard |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always make an effort to dress for a meet, and like a man who does the same. If a man met me wearing jogging bottoms and trainers, then it would make me wonder what his efforts are like in the bedroom. Call me a snob if you like, but that's my views.
I also went to a club and made a real effort with lace black dress, heels etc, then the next lady that walked in was wearing scruffy jeans and ugg boots, not a look that made her sexually appealing to me or my partner. |
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Why would they feel award and uncomfortable in a suit?
If they wore one often enough eg every time, they wouldn't feel awkward;)
I feel bloody uncomfortable in my heels and short dress often enough lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think smart casual can look very sexy indeed, and that includes decent jeans for me. But completely agree re: trainers and t-shirts ... it pees me off that *some* (not all) men turn up at (some) clubs looking like they've rolled in straight from work or an afternoon down the pub yet a good proportion of those will be hoping to get intimate. Sure - they may be absolutely fresh and clean beneath but I'm more likely to be drawn to someone who's made an obvious effort with how they're dressed as opposed to someone who's made little or no effort as I can't help wondering what other corners they've cut and how long it is since they've showered! "
My thoughts too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it's a bit shallow to think that just because someone is wearing a suit that their cleanliness level and their effort when they have sex is higher than someone who is wearing jeans and a T-shirt   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I remember a club (that has since closed) saying that they insisted on a suit because "you would't go to a wedding or a funeral in jeans and a tee shirt". It was a reference point that was lost on me but also inadvertently summed up neatly why I don;t feel sexy in a suit |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
CAn I say a smart casual for me is mixed
I have been in dark jeans, tshirt, and suit jacket with brand new white smart trainers
Also
It could be trousers, shirt with collar and brown shoes / black shoes
To me both are smart casual and I wear a mixture of both. Smart is troucers and shirt with shoes
For me I wear what I am comfy in within the dress code.
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What does it matter to you though? Your there for you so enjoy yourself and pay no heed to other that don't fit your standards.
Plus not sure about many clubs round then uk but when I go amour the dress code is dressed down so I'm on in my cloths till I get my locker key really then its boxers and towel. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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clean, paid for and comfy and you will feel sexier than standing awkward wondering what you look like - i only ever wear a very simple slip dress - minimal effort compared to basques and stockings etc - never had any complaints and im very relaxed dressed that way - |
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"just another bash the single guy post. yawn.........
I think it's more I think I'm better than other single guys and I'll say owt to stand out in the crowd post. "
The Op only finds men sexy if they are wearing a suit or good trousers ... otherwise they do nothing for him |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If they go onto a club like that, zero effort, I'd wonder what effort they'd put into play.
Unless they dress down to naked immediately of course;)"
I never dress up for sex; most of the time I don't put any make up on, and I'm a phenomenal fuck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If they go onto a club like that, zero effort, I'd wonder what effort they'd put into play.
Unless they dress down to naked immediately of course;)
I never dress up for sex; most of the time I don't put any make up on, and I'm a phenomenal fuck "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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jeans and a smart ironed shirt , pink , white , or yellow , and a pair of poished chelsea boots for me , fresh breath , nice aftershave .clean nails ,
i always make an effort |
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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago
in the eye of the storm |
"just another bash the single guy post. yawn.........
I think it's more I think I'm better than other single guys and I'll say owt to stand out in the crowd post. "
maybe it is a bit disconcerting when single guys start bashing other single guys on what they look like .
I'm going to say something controversial here but I thought it was only some women who bitched over how other women looked or dressed .but hay you learn something new every day on a swinging site apparently some guys do that to . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"jeans and a smart ironed shirt , pink , white , or yellow , and a pair of poished chelsea boots for me , fresh breath , nice aftershave .clean nails ,
i always make an effort"
m
Loose the pink or yellow then you'll be dressed appropriately |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"I think it's a bit shallow to think that just because someone is wearing a suit that their cleanliness level and their effort when they have sex is higher than someone who is wearing jeans and a T-shirt "
I'm not sure shallow is the right word, but I agree with the rest.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I also dress for sex for myself, not just for the man. My own pleasure and needs is equally as important "
Same here , I love to dress to impress .
But I truly don't look for smartly dressed guys at all . Jeans and a t shirt are fine thanks  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm almost always in a shirt, tie suit jacket & trousers in my vanilla life. I don't have any scruffier clothes lol However I rarely call people out on it. Just do what works for you.
I do have a problem however, if the club rules state trousers + shirt & someone turns up in jeans & a tee. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I also dress for sex for myself, not just for the man. My own pleasure and needs is equally as important
Same here , I love to dress to impress .
But I truly don't look for smartly dressed guys at all . Jeans and a t shirt are fine thanks "
Smart jeans, yes, definetly not jogging bottoms..yuk. |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
I'm more interested in the man, than his clothes. As long as they're clean and tidy and I find them attractive/pleasant. I don't really care what they're wearing.
A suit and shoes, does not automatically turn a turd into a diamond. |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"I am not keen on guys suited up, to be honest, but something fitting not too casual, I agree. I like someone to look natural and normal but not overdressed. Same for the women, not a fan of trussed up women either ..."
this, prefer to see someone comfortable with themselves and what they are wearing.. a lot of places they strip down to boxers or a towel anyway..not sure what the problem is..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am not keen on guys suited up, to be honest, but something fitting not too casual, I agree. I like someone to look natural and normal but not overdressed. Same for the women, not a fan of trussed up women either ...this, prefer to see someone comfortable with themselves and what they are wearing.. a lot of places they strip down to boxers or a towel anyway..not sure what the problem is.."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was in a club a few Saturday's ago and every woman with out exception had clearly taken a lot of time and effort with their dress and appearance, and to be fair most of men accompanying them had made a similar effort also.
So why is it the majority of single men think it's ok to wear trainer type shoes, jeans and a t-shirt or at best a polo shirt.
Come on guys, Shoes, Trousers and a nice Shirt is surely not to much to ask on a Saturday night.
The t-shirts and trainers look just detracts from any sexy atmosphere created by any club and the well dressed sexy couples.
Do everybody a favour guys and keep the casual clobber for the pub ect."
no. I'm not comfortable in that shit. |
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"I am not keen on guys suited up, to be honest, but something fitting not too casual, I agree. I like someone to look natural and normal but not overdressed. Same for the women, not a fan of trussed up women either ...this, prefer to see someone comfortable with themselves and what they are wearing.. a lot of places they strip down to boxers or a towel anyway..not sure what the problem is.."
I am a bit weird like that though as I hate towels and nudity ... just not sexy for me. Growing up in a seaside resort I think .... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"just another bash the single guy post. yawn.........
I think it's more I think I'm better than other single guys and I'll say owt to stand out in the crowd post. "
Looking at your pics, you appear to be a snappy dresser. I'm guessing you would probably not go to a club wearing some cheap jeans and a £8 t-shirt. No need for it to be proper trousers. I think dress to impress sums it up. Nice chinos, Shoes, shirt. I'm also puzzled why people are talking about suits, I never mentioned suits. I dont think it is just a coincidence that a lot of ladies on here agree with me on this subject. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"just another bash the single guy post. yawn.........
I think it's more I think I'm better than other single guys and I'll say owt to stand out in the crowd post.
Looking at your pics, you appear to be a snappy dresser. I'm guessing you would probably not go to a club wearing some cheap jeans and a £8 t-shirt. No need for it to be proper trousers. I think dress to impress sums it up. Nice chinos, Shoes, shirt. I'm also puzzled why people are talking about suits, I never mentioned suits. I dont think it is just a coincidence that a lot of ladies on here agree with me on this subject. "
People are talking about suits because it's what you infered when suggesting men should wear 'shoes, trousers and a nice shirt' |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"I am not keen on guys suited up, to be honest, but something fitting not too casual, I agree. I like someone to look natural and normal but not overdressed. Same for the women, not a fan of trussed up women either ...this, prefer to see someone comfortable with themselves and what they are wearing.. a lot of places they strip down to boxers or a towel anyway..not sure what the problem is..
I am a bit weird like that though as I hate towels and nudity ... just not sexy for me. Growing up in a seaside resort I think .... "
the point was that some clubs have this policy, so why should a guy get dressed up to the nines to walk in the door..if its a dress down club, which im not keen on, because i can get undressed quite well without being told to, if i want..i dont get dressed up, to get in the door either. i dont like suits on men, it reminds me how much they have given of their masculinity to the big man..bleh..just my preference to see them comfortable in their own chosen attire x |
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"I'm more interested in the man, than his clothes. As long as they're clean and tidy and I find them attractive/pleasant. I don't really care what they're wearing.
A suit and shoes, does not automatically turn a turd into a diamond. "
Smiled so much reading this, my thoughts exactly. |
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"I am not keen on guys suited up, to be honest, but something fitting not too casual, I agree. I like someone to look natural and normal but not overdressed. Same for the women, not a fan of trussed up women either ...this, prefer to see someone comfortable with themselves and what they are wearing.. a lot of places they strip down to boxers or a towel anyway..not sure what the problem is..
I am a bit weird like that though as I hate towels and nudity ... just not sexy for me. Growing up in a seaside resort I think .... the point was that some clubs have this policy, so why should a guy get dressed up to the nines to walk in the door..if its a dress down club, which im not keen on, because i can get undressed quite well without being told to, if i want..i dont get dressed up, to get in the door either. i dont like suits on men, it reminds me how much they have given of their masculinity to the big man..bleh..just my preference to see them comfortable in their own chosen attire x"
I get it but have to avoid clubs with towels and dressing gowns and nudity because it puts a downer on it for me .... bit like the OP and men in t shirts. I dont mind though, as I understand it turns a lot of people on, so we just avoid them. My OH gets annoyed at men who don't make the effort as he is from the kink scene ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm more interested in the man, than his clothes. As long as they're clean and tidy and I find them attractive/pleasant. I don't really care what they're wearing.
A suit and shoes, does not automatically turn a turd into a diamond.
Smiled so much reading this, my thoughts exactly."
Hahahaha what a great quote...turd into a diamond |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"I am not keen on guys suited up, to be honest, but something fitting not too casual, I agree. I like someone to look natural and normal but not overdressed. Same for the women, not a fan of trussed up women either ...this, prefer to see someone comfortable with themselves and what they are wearing.. a lot of places they strip down to boxers or a towel anyway..not sure what the problem is..
I am a bit weird like that though as I hate towels and nudity ... just not sexy for me. Growing up in a seaside resort I think .... the point was that some clubs have this policy, so why should a guy get dressed up to the nines to walk in the door..if its a dress down club, which im not keen on, because i can get undressed quite well without being told to, if i want..i dont get dressed up, to get in the door either. i dont like suits on men, it reminds me how much they have given of their masculinity to the big man..bleh..just my preference to see them comfortable in their own chosen attire x
I get it but have to avoid clubs with towels and dressing gowns and nudity because it puts a downer on it for me .... bit like the OP and men in t shirts. I dont mind though, as I understand it turns a lot of people on, so we just avoid them. My OH gets annoyed at men who don't make the effort as he is from the kink scene ... "
i prefer non dress down clubs, simply cos i dont like being told when to get undressed... i go occasionally, i go round blindfolded and do as im told |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
"jeans and a smart ironed shirt , pink , white , or yellow , and a pair of poished chelsea boots for me , fresh breath , nice aftershave .clean nails ,
i always make an effortm
Loose the pink or yellow then you'll be dressed appropriately "
There is nothing wrong with a pink shirt |
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"I'm more interested in the man, than his clothes. As long as they're clean and tidy and I find them attractive/pleasant. I don't really care what they're wearing.
A suit and shoes, does not automatically turn a turd into a diamond.
Smiled so much reading this, my thoughts exactly.
Hahahaha what a great quote...turd into a diamond "
While reading the other posts I had in my head "a gorilla in a suit is still a gorilla" but their version is so much better.
Who is to say trousers and a shirt takes more effort, are they heavier to pull up or something? I would much rather a guy wear a nice tight pair of jeans. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"jeans and a smart ironed shirt , pink , white , or yellow , and a pair of poished chelsea boots for me , fresh breath , nice aftershave .clean nails ,
i always make an effortm
Loose the pink or yellow then you'll be dressed appropriately
There is nothing wrong with a pink shirt "
True, but just my personal preference. I prefer a man not to wear pink as I like to wear pink |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"jeans and a smart ironed shirt , pink , white , or yellow , and a pair of poished chelsea boots for me , fresh breath , nice aftershave .clean nails ,
i always make an effortm
Loose the pink or yellow then you'll be dressed appropriately
There is nothing wrong with a pink shirt
True, but just my personal preference. I prefer a man not to wear pink as I like to wear pink "
wear his shirt, youd look great in it xx |
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"When you attend a Wet club, and you decide to go into the non clothed areas, you are faced with scrunching your best clothes into very small lockers...so I tend to go more casual than I would probably like to..."
So true . Else I have to avoid wet areas, and its something I don't always want to do. |
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"I'm more interested in the man, than his clothes. As long as they're clean and tidy and I find them attractive/pleasant. I don't really care what they're wearing.
A suit and shoes, does not automatically turn a turd into a diamond. "
Lmao Excellent phrase |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
"jeans and a smart ironed shirt , pink , white , or yellow , and a pair of poished chelsea boots for me , fresh breath , nice aftershave .clean nails ,
i always make an effortm
Loose the pink or yellow then you'll be dressed appropriately
There is nothing wrong with a pink shirt
True, but just my personal preference. I prefer a man not to wear pink as I like to wear pink "
That's kinda fair enough - I love wearing my pink shirt though I am looking for a decent pink jumper to go with it
That gets me on to why shirts all have to be slim fit nowadays  |
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"I'm also puzzled why people are talking about suits, I never mentioned suits. "
I was just about to say the same.
And I fully understand what you're trying to say.
In our view, people can dress how they like so long as it meets the dress-code of the club they're visiting. However the only times we have hooked-up with single men at clubs it has been when they have caught Mrs ddc's eye by being better dressed than the crowd.
So I guess what I'm saying is "dress how you like, but don't moan if others do better than you do."
Mr ddc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I agree that a guy should look nice and smell even nicer.
A suit though.....really, it's a club, not a conference. A smart pair of shoes, nice fitted jeans, belt, shirt and maybe a blazer is what's required. Not jeans and trainers ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"jeans and a smart ironed shirt , pink , white , or yellow , and a pair of poished chelsea boots for me , fresh breath , nice aftershave .clean nails ,
i always make an effortm
Loose the pink or yellow then you'll be dressed appropriately
There is nothing wrong with a pink shirt
True, but just my personal preference. I prefer a man not to wear pink as I like to wear pink wear his shirt, youd look great in it xx"
Thank you Suzy xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm also puzzled why people are talking about suits, I never mentioned suits.
I was just about to say the same.
And I fully understand what you're trying to say.
In our view, people can dress how they like so long as it meets the dress-code of the club they're visiting. However the only times we have hooked-up with single men at clubs it has been when they have caught Mrs ddc's eye by being better dressed than the crowd.
So I guess what I'm saying is "dress how you like, but don't moan if others do better than you do."
Mr ddc"
Many thanks for your comments, and I would like to say your photos are amazing, so original. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I agree that a guy should look nice and smell even nicer.
A suit though.....really, it's a club, not a conference. A smart pair of shoes, nice fitted jeans, belt, shirt and maybe a blazer is what's required. Not jeans and trainers ??"
You've got the perfect outfit summed up perfect |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm also puzzled why people are talking about suits, I never mentioned suits.
I was just about to say the same.
And I fully understand what you're trying to say.
In our view, people can dress how they like so long as it meets the dress-code of the club they're visiting. However the only times we have hooked-up with single men at clubs it has been when they have caught Mrs ddc's eye by being better dressed than the crowd.
So I guess what I'm saying is "dress how you like, but don't moan if others do better than you do."
Mr ddc"
What one person deems as being "better dressed", another person won't give a shit about what they're wearing. |
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"
Mr ddc
What one person deems as being "better dressed", another person won't give a shit about what they're wearing."
True, but one can only give one's own views and opinions. And I felt the OP was getting a rough ride despite having been misquoted.
Besides, no-one has said that someone dressed in scruffy, smelly joggers won't get a meet, just that they might not be doing themselves that many favours. Perhaps those sort of people would consider us "dress-code snobs" and wouldn't want to meet with us. In which case all is well, and the world has found a balance, no?
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Call me old-fashioned but I think it's important to look your very best when you are meeting someone for the first time where sex is not involved and even more important when you are. Sure you can wear whatever you want but it's what you wear and how it compliments you is what's important.
If I went to a club and I met a woman who didn't appear like they had made an effort, even if they thought they did, it would hardly inspire or generate attraction. So with that in mind, I wouldn't want to look my effortless best.
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