FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > How sexually liberated are you really?
How sexually liberated are you really?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I haven't been using the forums for a great deal of time, but I am perplexed by the numbers of judgmental people using these forums to castigate others.
How sexually liberated are you really?
ie. If you judge a man for having sex with another man, but wank furiously at the thought of two women at it, says more about you than it does those your judging. At least that what I reckon.
Two cocks in the same hole in an mmf, fine or a teeny bit bi, really?
Discuss.
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By *ea_CoffeeCouple
over a year ago
Near Kettering |
Were open to trying most things once and if it isnt for us we just move on.
We dont feel the need to humiliate others for their fantasies, desires or sexual preferences.
Just go and have fun. Life is far too short to try and live by someone else definition of how it should be lived.
Just keep it concensual, legal and mainly fun.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I haven't been using the forums for a great deal of time, but I am perplexed by the numbers of judgmental people using these forums to castigate others.
How sexually liberated are you really?
ie. If you judge a man for having sex with another man, but wank furiously at the thought of two women at it, says more about you than it does those your judging. At least that what I reckon.
Two cocks in the same hole in an mmf, fine or a teeny bit bi, really?
Discuss.
"
Judge not lest ye be judged.
Doesn't stop you, me or anyone else judging though. |
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As our profile shows we are regular doggers and although its a million miles from our everyday life we enjoy it. Yet its surprising how many on here are quite dismissive and offensive about it. Like you say, if its not for you move on and keep the comments to themselves. Good topic . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I haven't been using the forums for a great deal of time, but I am perplexed by the numbers of judgmental people using these forums to castigate others.
How sexually liberated are you really?
ie. If you judge a man for having sex with another man, but wank furiously at the thought of two women at it, says more about you than it does those your judging. At least that what I reckon.
Two cocks in the same hole in an mmf, fine or a teeny bit bi, really?
Discuss.
"
I think a lot of the time posters are seen as judgemental for having preferences about who they wish to meet. I have no problem whatsoever with what other consenting members do with each other, however it doesn't mean I want to meet them.
I don't get your argument about 2 men versus 2 females, they are entirely different. I get turned on by the thought of a man fking my FWB but not a woman fking him. Different things turn different people on. Everyone to their own I say, as long as it's legal. Dogging appeals to me with right partner. XXX |
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"I haven't been using the forums for a great deal of time, but I am perplexed by the numbers of judgmental people using these forums to castigate others.
How sexually liberated are you really?
ie. If you judge a man for having sex with another man, but wank furiously at the thought of two women at it, says more about you than it does those your judging. At least that what I reckon.
Two cocks in the same hole in an mmf, fine or a teeny bit bi, really?
Discuss.
"
Ps this post as a judgemental tone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I haven't been using the forums for a great deal of time, but I am perplexed by the numbers of judgmental people using these forums to castigate others.
How sexually liberated are you really?
ie. If you judge a man for having sex with another man, but wank furiously at the thought of two women at it, says more about you than it does those your judging. At least that what I reckon.
Two cocks in the same hole in an mmf, fine or a teeny bit bi, really?
Discuss.
"
Up for any combination but struggling to find men who can treat me like a human being or single women who have not been put off by the men I just described. I was on here over 10 years ago and other swinging sites when people used to chat and get to know you before they asked to fuck you.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we all outside the normal view of life on here .so enjoy what you do .and let other folks enjoy what they do."
Not really multiple partner sex is higher than ever in most ages groups but mainly in under 40s |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I genuinely do not give a fuck about any things people choose to do or combination of meetup. I actually find it interesting to see all the different things people are looking for. If its something i want to try ill say so other wise just enjoy being more the wiser.
Probably because id almost try anything weird. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We mainly find that the only people in the swinging scene we are judgemental of are those who judge others .
We enjoy dogging , group sex , TVs , and are open to try pretty much anything .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There's a difference between quietly judging (which most, if not all of us do) and being openly small-minded.
Different strokes for different folks, innit! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I don't get your argument about 2 men versus 2 females, they are entirely different. I get turned on by the thought of a man fking my FWB but not a woman fking him. Different things turn different people on."
I think that the point is some people will be all about women fucking, but then be homophobic towards men fucking.
Nobody is saying you have to join in with everything, but you should be kind to others and not be negative about their choices about who they sleep with - as long as they're not hurting anyone (or if they're hurting people - as long as they'e consenting).
Lots of men though, in my experience, can be quite nasty to bisexual men. I even occasionally get guys messaging me on other sites to tell me I'm disgusting because I sleep with men who are bisexual. Yet at the same time they're looking for MFF threesomes. Well I'm sorry - but if you're actively homophobic towards two men being together, you don't get to witness two women being together. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am extremely liberal and open-minded towards anything sexual/sexuality that isn't life-threatening, overly violent or involves animals and underage people. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Describing others as judgemental is judgemental.
Two kinds of people in the world, those who judge others and motherfucking liars."
There's being judgemental and making a judgment.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Describing others as judgemental is judgemental.
Two kinds of people in the world, those who judge others and motherfucking liars.
There's being judgemental and making a judgment.
"
Despite the semantics, they are essentially the same thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Describing others as judgemental is judgemental.
Two kinds of people in the world, those who judge others and motherfucking liars.
There's being judgemental and making a judgment.
Despite the semantics, they are essentially the same thing."
Not quite.
A judgment would be about making a decision that would be not criticising but to do the sensible thing. I can look at someone and think they aren't for me, because they do things I don't want, for example.
Being judgemental means thinking that person is wrong for doing what they do, and being critical of them.
They aren't the same thing.
I can judge something and not be judgemental about it.
A Judge isn't allowed to be judgemental, they have to stay impartial. |
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Im judgmental and not ashamed to say so.
Just because i like some things or some people doesnt mean i have to like everything and everyone. I may meet people who i dont agree with everything they get up to or other things i may not like about them but i may meet them because we get on ok and enjoy the same things. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Openly bisexual and proud  some people do say things on here that are hurtful and really confuse me on how they can believe it, but just means I know that I will never meet those people. The best thing is to just ignore the "haters" and to move on and enjoy your fabs experience! |
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"Were open to trying most things once and if it isnt for us we just move on.
We dont feel the need to humiliate others for their fantasies, desires or sexual preferences.
Just go and have fun. Life is far too short to try and live by someone else definition of how it should be lived.
Just keep it concensual, legal and mainly fun.
"
Took the words right out my mouth |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
"
This. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I don't get your argument about 2 men versus 2 females, they are entirely different. I get turned on by the thought of a man fking my FWB but not a woman fking him. Different things turn different people on.
I think that the point is some people will be all about women fucking, but then be homophobic towards men fucking.
Nobody is saying you have to join in with everything, but you should be kind to others and not be negative about their choices about who they sleep with - as long as they're not hurting anyone (or if they're hurting people - as long as they'e consenting).
Lots of men though, in my experience, can be quite nasty to bisexual men. I even occasionally get guys messaging me on other sites to tell me I'm disgusting because I sleep with men who are bisexual. Yet at the same time they're looking for MFF threesomes. Well I'm sorry - but if you're actively homophobic towards two men being together, you don't get to witness two women being together."
That's an interesting one. Being more acceptable for women to play together than for men. I've had that same discussion with my husband who also felt it was unfair that women can play together without question but men can't. I didn't want to see him play with a man. It was just something I didn't like the idea of watching, though I said he could do whatever he likes if I'm not there. But he didn't want that, as he didn't want to exclude me from things he enjoys. He pointed out that I sometimes play with women, so what's the difference. Fast forward, we have now experimented a bit with bisexual threeesomes and I realise I was wrong to be be narrow minded. However we would only ever do that in private, whereas I might still play with women in public. So I guess still feel there is a difference, but I dont know why. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Making a judgement is making an informed decision.
Being judgemental isn't. It's being overtly critical."
It's expressing an opinion, you cannot have freedom of speech without it. And for the overly-sensitive, expressions that don't gel with their own or are seen as 'critical' to their lifestyle (even when simply factual) are "judgemental". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
"
A stable society is impossible without rules. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
A stable society is impossible without rules."
Spain seems to be going good without a formal government  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
A stable society is impossible without rules.
Spain seems to be going good without a formal government "
They've still got law enforcement |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
A stable society is impossible without rules."
That's true. Even criminal groups have their own in-house rules.
So I guess for swingers, who go outside society's rules, a new set of rules appropriate to swinging evolves. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
A stable society is impossible without rules.
That's true. Even criminal groups have their own in-house rules.
So I guess for swingers, who go outside society's rules, a new set of rules appropriate to swinging evolves."
Exactly, and if someone has an issue with someone else's ruleset being different to theirs, perhaps they're not as open-minded and non-judgemental as they think..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
A stable society is impossible without rules.
That's true. Even criminal groups have their own in-house rules.
So I guess for swingers, who go outside society's rules, a new set of rules appropriate to swinging evolves.
Exactly, and if someone has an issue with someone else's ruleset being different to theirs, perhaps they're not as open-minded and non-judgemental as they think....."
I think for me there are rules that are universally accepted by swingers e.g. 'no means no' and 'always assume to use a condom unless otherwise has been agreed' and of course any activity must be consensual. Then people have their own set of personal rules. However sometimes people use their personal rules are used as a benchmark to judge others negatively who have a different set of personal rules. |
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I think that we're pretty sexually open minded people, but then I'd say we're pretty open minded generally.
We might (and do) think that 'bareback' sex isn't for us (which means that we don't contact those who do) but we'd never consider condemning those who chose to do so.
To us that's no different to not choosing a vegetarian diet or to spend all our money on a big house. Not for us, but whatever floats your boats is fine - why should we have an opinion? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I genuinely do not give a fuck about any things people choose to do or combination of meetup. I actually find it interesting to see all the different things people are looking for. If its something i want to try ill say so other wise just enjoy being more the wiser.
Probably because id almost try anything weird."
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I haven't been using the forums for a great deal of time, but I am perplexed by the numbers of judgmental people using these forums to castigate others.
How sexually liberated are you really?
ie. If you judge a man for having sex with another man, but wank furiously at the thought of two women at it, says more about you than it does those your judging. At least that what I reckon.
Two cocks in the same hole in an mmf, fine or a teeny bit bi, really?
Discuss.
Ps this post as a judgemental tone "
That wasn't the intention, but I see where you are coming from in making the point. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Describing others as judgemental is judgemental.
Two kinds of people in the world, those who judge others and motherfucking liars."
I've never fucked my mother and that ain't no lie!  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"There's a difference between quietly judging (which most, if not all of us do) and being openly small-minded.
Different strokes for different folks, innit! "
I suppose it's the 'openly small-minded' that I am hinting at? Those who feel the need to denigrate other people's sexuality, ethnicity etc. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
I don't get your argument about 2 men versus 2 females, they are entirely different. I get turned on by the thought of a man fking my FWB but not a woman fking him. Different things turn different people on.
I think that the point is some people will be all about women fucking, but then be homophobic towards men fucking.
Nobody is saying you have to join in with everything, but you should be kind to others and not be negative about their choices about who they sleep with - as long as they're not hurting anyone (or if they're hurting people - as long as they'e consenting).
Lots of men though, in my experience, can be quite nasty to bisexual men. I even occasionally get guys messaging me on other sites to tell me I'm disgusting because I sleep with men who are bisexual. Yet at the same time they're looking for MFF threesomes. Well I'm sorry - but if you're actively homophobic towards two men being together, you don't get to witness two women being together."
Thank you so much for putting more succinctly my point and seeing where I was coming from. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Describing others as judgemental is judgemental.
Two kinds of people in the world, those who judge others and motherfucking liars.
There's being judgemental and making a judgment.
"
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
"
Excellent points and thank you for contributing, it's given me more pause for thought. Wish there was a hands clapping emoji |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My stand point sexually is the same as my approach to life.
As long as it's legal between consenting adults and no one gets hurt(unless they like that of course), then I'm fine with it. Might not be my bag, but I'd never castigate others for what they do. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
I don't get your argument about 2 men versus 2 females, they are entirely different. I get turned on by the thought of a man fking my FWB but not a woman fking him. Different things turn different people on.
I think that the point is some people will be all about women fucking, but then be homophobic towards men fucking.
Nobody is saying you have to join in with everything, but you should be kind to others and not be negative about their choices about who they sleep with - as long as they're not hurting anyone (or if they're hurting people - as long as they'e consenting).
Lots of men though, in my experience, can be quite nasty to bisexual men. I even occasionally get guys messaging me on other sites to tell me I'm disgusting because I sleep with men who are bisexual. Yet at the same time they're looking for MFF threesomes. Well I'm sorry - but if you're actively homophobic towards two men being together, you don't get to witness two women being together.
That's an interesting one. Being more acceptable for women to play together than for men. I've had that same discussion with my husband who also felt it was unfair that women can play together without question but men can't. I didn't want to see him play with a man. It was just something I didn't like the idea of watching, though I said he could do whatever he likes if I'm not there. But he didn't want that, as he didn't want to exclude me from things he enjoys. He pointed out that I sometimes play with women, so what's the difference. Fast forward, we have now experimented a bit with bisexual threeesomes and I realise I was wrong to be be narrow minded. However we would only ever do that in private, whereas I might still play with women in public. So I guess still feel there is a difference, but I dont know why."
BUT, you are opening your minds and becoming more sexually liberal! Excellent. |
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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago
in the eye of the storm |
"I haven't been using the forums for a great deal of time, but I am perplexed by the numbers of judgmental people using these forums to castigate others.
How sexually liberated are you really?
ie. If you judge a man for having sex with another man, but wank furiously at the thought of two women at it, says more about you than it does those your judging. At least that what I reckon.
Two cocks in the same hole in an mmf, fine or a teeny bit bi, really?
Discuss.
"
op I'm so sexually repressed I only do it with the lights off once a month and even then I find the whole thing rather boring and messy something I rather do without in all honesty   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Making a judgement is making an informed decision.
Being judgemental isn't. It's being overtly critical.
It's expressing an opinion, you cannot have freedom of speech without it. And for the overly-sensitive, expressions that don't gel with their own or are seen as 'critical' to their lifestyle (even when simply factual) are "judgemental". "
I wasnt really talking about that, more the derogatory comments that have been made about gay, bi, non-whites etc of late. I should have spent more time on the thread but it was 4am when I wrote it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Making a judgement is making an informed decision.
Being judgemental isn't. It's being overtly critical.
It's expressing an opinion, you cannot have freedom of speech without it. And for the overly-sensitive, expressions that don't gel with their own or are seen as 'critical' to their lifestyle (even when simply factual) are "judgemental". "
One can make a judgment without expressing an opinion.
That bedroom is untidy-a judgment based on appearance.
That bedroom look like a pig lives in it-a judgemental statement, aimed at the bedroom owner. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Making a judgement is making an informed decision.
Being judgemental isn't. It's being overtly critical.
It's expressing an opinion, you cannot have freedom of speech without it. And for the overly-sensitive, expressions that don't gel with their own or are seen as 'critical' to their lifestyle (even when simply factual) are "judgemental".
One can make a judgment without expressing an opinion.
That bedroom is untidy-a judgment based on appearance.
That bedroom look like a pig lives in it-a judgemental statement, aimed at the bedroom owner. "
It's a simile, if someone chooses to interpret it as a judgement on them personally, that is their choice. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
A stable society is impossible without rules.
That's true. Even criminal groups have their own in-house rules.
So I guess for swingers, who go outside society's rules, a new set of rules appropriate to swinging evolves.
Exactly, and if someone has an issue with someone else's ruleset being different to theirs, perhaps they're not as open-minded and non-judgemental as they think....."
..... Again, not he point I was really making. There is, like it or not, racism (albeit described as a preference choice) and homophobia (towards men) on this site.
It isn't discernment, it is judgmental and, I guess I'm going to be shot down, a little bit hypocritical given the behaviours most of us are engaging in, or seeking to engage in, basically fall outside of the norms of wider society. Hence, my hope we'd all be more open-minded and, perhaps the term I should have used 'NON-LABELLING'. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think what you're referring to in your opening paragraph, OP, better describes empty minded people rather than open minded people. "
Explain please? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
A stable society is impossible without rules.
That's true. Even criminal groups have their own in-house rules.
So I guess for swingers, who go outside society's rules, a new set of rules appropriate to swinging evolves.
Exactly, and if someone has an issue with someone else's ruleset being different to theirs, perhaps they're not as open-minded and non-judgemental as they think.....
..... Again, not he point I was really making. There is, like it or not, racism (albeit described as a preference choice) and homophobia (towards men) on this site.
It isn't discernment, it is judgmental and, I guess I'm going to be shot down, a little bit hypocritical given the behaviours most of us are engaging in, or seeking to engage in, basically fall outside of the norms of wider society. Hence, my hope we'd all be more open-minded and, perhaps the term I should have used 'NON-LABELLING'. "
Do you mean people who say they don't want to meet bi men? |
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By *howboatMan
over a year ago
Canterbury |
I still think it's more fun to get to know someone first, it just adds to the eroticism and I think it's a basic human courtesy.
I have met people who've indulged all my fetishes and kinks and it's been incredible but passionate erotic "conventional" sex can be equally mind blowing |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I wonder if it's human nature to have rules. Joining the swing scene means a lot of societies rules are broken. But I find some people in the swing scene have extremely stringent rules, rules that are still relevant outside the swing scene, but less stridently.
Though shalt not have bareback sex with anyone ever
Though shalt not display a photo of bareback sex because it means you are not safe
Though shalt not have too many verifications because that means you have too many partners
Though shalt not play with someone who is cheating
Though shalt not go on a date because this is a sex site
Though shalt be totally honest at all times and especially regarding age and sexuality
Wonder if it's hunan nature to enforce rules more rigorously when people are given freedom that they didn't otherwise have. I.e., drop societies rules of not having casual sexual, but only on these terms.
Mrs
A stable society is impossible without rules.
That's true. Even criminal groups have their own in-house rules.
So I guess for swingers, who go outside society's rules, a new set of rules appropriate to swinging evolves.
Exactly, and if someone has an issue with someone else's ruleset being different to theirs, perhaps they're not as open-minded and non-judgemental as they think.....
..... Again, not he point I was really making. There is, like it or not, racism (albeit described as a preference choice) and homophobia (towards men) on this site.
It isn't discernment, it is judgmental and, I guess I'm going to be shot down, a little bit hypocritical given the behaviours most of us are engaging in, or seeking to engage in, basically fall outside of the norms of wider society. Hence, my hope we'd all be more open-minded and, perhaps the term I should have used 'NON-LABELLING'.
Do you mean people who say they don't want to meet bi men? "
No, people who feel the need to openly discuss their issues with others who do. Or hijack a thread about, say barebacking or watersports and ridiculing or putting down others who may be into those things.
Im not making much sense because I'm out of my head on tramadol haha
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a very sexually liberated woman that earned that liberation. I am very proud of the fact that I feel comfortable in certain forums discussing sex.
My mum used to say to me "Don't judge somebody just because they sin differently than you". I try not to be judgemental and know when to keep my feelings about things to myself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Right now, not especially liberated.
Combination of stress and other matters have lead to a complete failure of all libido. Sexually liberated? Im not even sexual at this point, liberal or otherwise |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm a very sexually liberated woman that earned that liberation. I am very proud of the fact that I feel comfortable in certain forums discussing sex.
My mum used to say to me "Don't judge somebody just because they sin differently than you". I try not to be judgemental and know when to keep my feelings about things to myself. "
Your mum sounds like a very WISE lady.
*removed previous post, due to wise being autocorrected to wide* |
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"As our profile shows we are regular doggers and although its a million miles from our everyday life we enjoy it. Yet its surprising how many on here are quite dismissive and offensive about it. Like you say, if its not for you move on and keep the comments to themselves. Good topic ."
I would love to try dogging so would my partner...I am slightly nervous tho x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We are I feel pretty liberated but that doesn't mean we are interested in bi guys. Sorry op.
We all have limits. All have preferences.
A thinly veiled plea from the op complaining that many couples avoid bi guys won't change our minds.
If in his opinion that makes us narrow minded then we are not too bothered. |
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"We are I feel pretty liberated but that doesn't mean we are interested in bi guys. Sorry op.
We all have limits. All have preferences.
A thinly veiled plea from the op complaining that many couples avoid bi guys won't change our minds.
If in his opinion that makes us narrow minded then we are not too bothered. "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We are I feel pretty liberated but that doesn't mean we are interested in bi guys. Sorry op.
We all have limits. All have preferences.
A thinly veiled plea from the op complaining that many couples avoid bi guys won't change our minds.
If in his opinion that makes us narrow minded then we are not too bothered. "
You've read my post wrong, I'm currently only seeking single males actually. Also, you've chosen to take on board only that which you wanted to.
The point I was aiming at was the belittling of people, which you've just tried to do to me. Therefore, in a way I must thank you for helping prove my point. I won't thank you though, as you may be offended or feel I am hankering after a meet!
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I only judge judgemental people ... and I get a lot of stick for it ... but they don't often realise I am trying to point out, too subtly I guess, how judgemental they really are ... especially toward bi men and anything interracial. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No I think we read your post correctly.
Seeing your reaction I have no doubt now."
Brill - and you sounded just the sort of people who would be a hoot to be around - have fun in your glasshouse! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I go with the big book and its between a man and woman "
He did create Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve eh?! lol Shame the faux Christians* forget that said Adam and Eve went on to populate the earth through a form of incest!
*other religious zealots are also available |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I go with the big book and its between a man and woman
He did create Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve eh?! lol Shame the faux Christians* forget that said Adam and Eve went on to populate the earth through a form of incest!
*other religious zealots are also available"
It was not considered a sin and was not prohibited for adam and early man. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I go with the big book and its between a man and woman
He did create Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve eh?! lol Shame the faux Christians* forget that said Adam and Eve went on to populate the earth through a form of incest!
*other religious zealots are also availableIt was not considered a sin and was not prohibited for adam and early man."
Oh, crumbs. Were you actually being serious in your first 'big book' comment? I thought you were joking. I really don't want to turn this into a a theological debate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I go with the big book and its between a man and woman
He did create Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve eh?! lol Shame the faux Christians* forget that said Adam and Eve went on to populate the earth through a form of incest!
*other religious zealots are also availableIt was not considered a sin and was not prohibited for adam and early man.
Oh, crumbs. Were you actually being serious in your first 'big book' comment? I thought you were joking. I really don't want to turn this into a a theological debate."
That is right, it could been a long debate there lol.
Both yes and no, but mostly yes as it originally is between the 2 you know. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We are I feel pretty liberated but that doesn't mean we are interested in bi guys. Sorry op.
We all have limits. All have preferences.
A thinly veiled plea from the op complaining that many couples avoid bi guys won't change our minds.
If in his opinion that makes us narrow minded then we are not too bothered. "
Seriously?! Is that how you interpreted the OPs opening post? I didn't get the impression from anything he said that he was remotely interested in couples or trying to convince straight couples not to avoid bi guys. Especially as his profile states he is only looking for single guys. I mean I f I stumbled across his profile, I would take the view that he would not be interested in us as a couple because I'm female. I could be wrong, and it can't be proven, but I got the impression that he was starting a discussion thread because it interested him. 
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I go with the big book and its between a man and woman
He did create Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve eh?! lol Shame the faux Christians* forget that said Adam and Eve went on to populate the earth through a form of incest!
*other religious zealots are also availableIt was not considered a sin and was not prohibited for adam and early man.
Oh, crumbs. Were you actually being serious in your first 'big book' comment? I thought you were joking. I really don't want to turn this into a a theological debate.That is right, it could been a long debate there lol.
Both yes and no, but mostly yes as it originally is between the 2 you know."
Well of course I know that! If we believe a word written and rewritten and edited and amended over millennia? I know the Bible very well, I would make mention of Sodom and Gommorah, but God punished not only those men who lay with men, but also all the fornicators of women other than their legal spouse. Probably not the best site for that, this, is it really?
Religious folk need to ensure they are applying every element of their belief themselves first, before attempting to criticise others. Who may, or may not, consider themselves to be a believer in the same doctrine. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We are I feel pretty liberated but that doesn't mean we are interested in bi guys. Sorry op.
We all have limits. All have preferences.
A thinly veiled plea from the op complaining that many couples avoid bi guys won't change our minds.
If in his opinion that makes us narrow minded then we are not too bothered.
Seriously?! Is that how you interpreted the OPs opening post? I didn't get the impression from anything he said that he was remotely interested in couples or trying to convince straight couples not to avoid bi guys. Especially as his profile states he is only looking for single guys. I mean I f I stumbled across his profile, I would take the view that he would not be interested in us as a couple because I'm female. I could be wrong, and it can't be proven, but I got the impression that he was starting a discussion thread because it interested him.
Mrs"
Thank you so very much, that was the intention to debate and discuss. Not to be belittled or put down (as possibly two contributors to the thread have done). Interestingly, I can check either of their profiles, because theyve blocked me!
Thank you again |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We are I feel pretty liberated but that doesn't mean we are interested in bi guys. Sorry op.
We all have limits. All have preferences.
A thinly veiled plea from the op complaining that many couples avoid bi guys won't change our minds.
If in his opinion that makes us narrow minded then we are not too bothered.
Seriously?! Is that how you interpreted the OPs opening post? I didn't get the impression from anything he said that he was remotely interested in couples or trying to convince straight couples not to avoid bi guys. Especially as his profile states he is only looking for single guys. I mean I f I stumbled across his profile, I would take the view that he would not be interested in us as a couple because I'm female. I could be wrong, and it can't be proven, but I got the impression that he was starting a discussion thread because it interested him.
Mrs
Thank you so very much, that was the intention to debate and discuss. Not to be belittled or put down (as possibly two contributors to the thread have done). Interestingly, I can check either of their profiles, because theyve blocked me!
Thank you again "
*can't check |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I anticipated that perhaps 'Shag Tonight' would have attempted to have backed up his Big Book rhetoric? Looks like I was wrong, or do you not know the Big Book that well? |
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