FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > The male half wants you
The male half wants you
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I've often had the situation when I'm chatting to a couple that insist they only ever play together, but then the male half of the couple messages me privately as they only want to meet me behind their partners back? Is this quite common practice on here? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm open about being here without my o/h knowledge. (I have my reasons whether you agree with them or not)
However on a forum post many moons ago a woman from a couple was having a right go - it was a swinging site, not a cheaters site etc. I did the usual - how do you know the strangers you meet really are single, but it quickly became apparent that it was her own insecurities that were the issue, so i left it be.
Then i get a pm from the guy from his 'single' profile, to appologise as he thought she had gone too far, then he asked me for a meet !
I left that one well alone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Amuses me when it comes from a couple who's profile is ranty about bi men.
You know the ones; they'll block if you've ever even so much spoken to a bi guy. Guessing the guy doesn't want his wife to know he likes more adventurous and liberated encounters  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes it is common enough and something that I found surprising also (you'd think that a couple that has had the openness to meet others for sex can navigate negotiations about meeting separately too?). And yes, both men and women off couples do it, it's not just the men. Personally I don't get so many offers to meet separately but I get requests for more pics and/or randy chats, cam etc, sometimes with the added reassurance that "she doesn't mind". It just makes me feel very awkward and I break off communications because it is not a situation I can get a clear picture of, as an outsider. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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ive had females from couples message me privately,and been tempted by a couple,but they were,nt quite my type,
now if a female whom I fancy messages me,i would,nt have an issue playing behind his back?? I know,i know morally wrong but hay I'm a man |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm open about being here without my o/h knowledge. (I have my reasons whether you agree with them or not)
However on a forum post many moons ago a woman from a couple was having a right go - it was a swinging site, not a cheaters site etc. I did the usual - how do you know the strangers you meet really are single, but it quickly became apparent that it was her own insecurities that were the issue, so i left it be.
Then i get a pm from the guy from his 'single' profile, to appologise as he thought she had gone too far, then he asked me for a meet !
I left that one well alone."
That's what makes me laugh. They come the moral high ground about cheating but little do they know their spouse/partner are cheating behind their back. Hilarious  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes frequently, I always say no as I don't host and don't fancy the female catching us and giving me a smack in the chops. I did meet male half of couple once though at theirs. XXX |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Certainly wouldn't happen with us at all wouldn't expect puk to meet guys solo, so only rite I wouldn't meet a lady solo, started as a couple and continue as just that |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"ive had females from couples message me privately,and been tempted by a couple,but they were,nt quite my type,
now if a female whom I fancy messages me,i would,nt have an issue playing behind his back?? I know,i know morally wrong but hay I'm a man"
As long as people have fun and no one is hurt, i don't have a moral issue. But not everyone is as open minded as me |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
I think a lot of the time on here there are members that start as couples & maybe find it's not to her taste or that they never get the free time to play together so just the male is now on the profile, ergo you never were being messaged by the couple it was always only him..
Gets him past a lot of filters too..
S |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me its a no no to meet a guy without his partners knowledge and yes im sure I have in clubs on occassion but will do my best to avoid it. For some reason it feels even worse.
Once had a woman cancel a meet with Mr as she had thought it was behind my back and she cancelled once she knew i knew x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The site is full of people playing away, couples and singles, male and female.
I think we get more messages from cheaters than those that are not. "
Exactly, all in the name of fun |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I had one do that, and he was gorgeous too. Was gutting to turn him down. And they wouldn't meet us as a couple. He was quite persistent too. Bit annoying.  "
Well then you should of met him if it made you feel gutted saying no |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes frequently, I always say no as I don't host and don't fancy the female catching us and giving me a smack in the chops. I did meet male half of couple once though at theirs. XXX"
If you played discreetly though then there's no chance of he catching you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ive had females from couples message me privately,and been tempted by a couple,but they were,nt quite my type,
now if a female whom I fancy messages me,i would,nt have an issue playing behind his back?? I know,i know morally wrong but hay I'm a man
As long as people have fun and no one is hurt, i don't have a moral issue. But not everyone is as open minded as me "
How about when people do get hurt though? Theres no way of knowing when thats going to happen.
Im all for people doing what they want, but you have to accept it causes hurt sometimes too. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"ive had females from couples message me privately,and been tempted by a couple,but they were,nt quite my type,
now if a female whom I fancy messages me,i would,nt have an issue playing behind his back?? I know,i know morally wrong but hay I'm a man
As long as people have fun and no one is hurt, i don't have a moral issue. But not everyone is as open minded as me
How about when people do get hurt though? Theres no way of knowing when thats going to happen.
Im all for people doing what they want, but you have to accept it causes hurt sometimes too. "
Exactly, hurts sometimes, but not always. If a person is extremely discrete then no one need to get hurt. Simples |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ive had females from couples message me privately,and been tempted by a couple,but they were,nt quite my type,
now if a female whom I fancy messages me,i would,nt have an issue playing behind his back?? I know,i know morally wrong but hay I'm a man
As long as people have fun and no one is hurt, i don't have a moral issue. But not everyone is as open minded as me
How about when people do get hurt though? Theres no way of knowing when thats going to happen.
Im all for people doing what they want, but you have to accept it causes hurt sometimes too.
Exactly, hurts sometimes, but not always. If a person is extremely discrete then no one need to get hurt. Simples "
i used to think like this.. Till I was the one cheated on.. being on the other end... well it taught me a strong lesson and no way do I want to be the woman responsible for making another woman feel the soul crushing devastation I felt. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"ive had females from couples message me privately,and been tempted by a couple,but they were,nt quite my type,
now if a female whom I fancy messages me,i would,nt have an issue playing behind his back?? I know,i know morally wrong but hay I'm a man
As long as people have fun and no one is hurt, i don't have a moral issue. But not everyone is as open minded as me
How about when people do get hurt though? Theres no way of knowing when thats going to happen.
Im all for people doing what they want, but you have to accept it causes hurt sometimes too.
Exactly, hurts sometimes, but not always. If a person is extremely discrete then no one need to get hurt. Simples i used to think like this.. Till I was the one cheated on.. being on the other end... well it taught me a strong lesson and no way do I want to be the woman responsible for making another woman feel the soul crushing devastation I felt. "
Interesting....yet you are on here meeting people ? With no way of knowing whether those you meet are genuinely single or genuine couples ?...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Interesting....yet you are on here meeting people ? With no way of knowing whether those you meet are genuinely single or genuine couples ?......"
as ive already said I try to make sure they are married to each other.. it some what limits options. Im not stupid but would never knowingly fuck someone elses partner and would have words with any woman trying it on with my guy behind my back.
And my decision goes for women playing away too.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Interesting....yet you are on here meeting people ? With no way of knowing whether those you meet are genuinely single or genuine couples ?...... as ive already said I try to make sure they are married to each other.. it some what limits options. Im not stupid but would never knowingly fuck someone elses partner and would have words with any woman trying it on with my guy behind my back.
And my decision goes for women playing away too.
"
There's no way that you can check they are married to each other and if you play in clubs as I see by your verifications that you do, there will be a lot of men in there who are married/attached or say otherwise. Your kidding yourself if you think people are honest with you
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We often send messages to couple accounts and more often get the male talking saying he'll meet us but his other half's not playing at the moment. It's a joke"
Yes that's obvious it's a single male. They must think we're daft |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Had a strange one a couple of weeks ago. Git asked if I'd meet his wife. So he watch. Want interested in joining in. Spoke to his wife on the phone as I was suspicious they had separate profiles. Had a great time. Then after he messages me to arrange a meet of his own. When I said he could have joined in. His reply ws the Mrs wouldn't have liked that. Persoally I think he just gets a kick out of cheating.
XX |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Had a strange one a couple of weeks ago. Git asked if I'd meet his wife. So he watch. Want interested in joining in. Spoke to his wife on the phone as I was suspicious they had separate profiles. Had a great time. Then after he messages me to arrange a meet of his own. When I said he could have joined in. His reply ws the Mrs wouldn't have liked that. Persoally I think he just gets a kick out of cheating.
Nothing wrong with that.....each to their own and all that.
XX "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Interesting....yet you are on here meeting people ? With no way of knowing whether those you meet are genuinely single or genuine couples ?...... as ive already said I try to make sure they are married to each other.. it some what limits options. Im not stupid but would never knowingly fuck someone elses partner and would have words with any woman trying it on with my guy behind my back.
And my decision goes for women playing away too.
There's no way that you can check they are married to each other and if you play in clubs as I see by your verifications that you do, there will be a lot of men in there who are married/attached or say otherwise. Your kidding yourself if you think people are honest with you
"
I have never said i think they are honest and guessing you dont read what is actually replied to you. As just said we do our best but under no illusions that at some point but it someone is up front that they are after a bit behind their partners back we choose to say no.. and do think playing with one half of a couple behind the other halfs on here is worse. As this lifestyle is all about trust when sharing with a partner.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've often had the situation when I'm chatting to a couple that insist they only ever play together, but then the male half of the couple messages me privately as they only want to meet me behind their partners back? Is this quite common practice on here?"
I've had it loads, its surprising how many totally in love couples there are on here who have an amazing sex life already are cheating on each other  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Interesting....yet you are on here meeting people ? With no way of knowing whether those you meet are genuinely single or genuine couples ?...... as ive already said I try to make sure they are married to each other.. it some what limits options. Im not stupid but would never knowingly fuck someone elses partner and would have words with any woman trying it on with my guy behind my back.
And my decision goes for women playing away too.
There's no way that you can check they are married to each other and if you play in clubs as I see by your verifications that you do, there will be a lot of men in there who are married/attached or say otherwise. Your kidding yourself if you think people are honest with you
I have never said i think they are honest and guessing you dont read what is actually replied to you. As just said we do our best but under no illusions that at some point but it someone is up front that they are after a bit behind their partners back we choose to say no.. and do think playing with one half of a couple behind the other halfs on here is worse. As this lifestyle is all about trust when sharing with a partner.
"
I did fully read your post fully and replied appropriately with my own opinion. All I am saying is that people on here cheat a lot, it's bound to in this sort of lifestyle. If you feel you can trust people you meet then good for you, but personally speaking, I'm a lot more wary and I've minded to what actually goes on. Trust is a word casually thrown around my many people on here I'm afraid. |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"I've often had the situation when I'm chatting to a couple that insist they only ever play together, but then the male half of the couple messages me privately as they only want to meet me behind their partners back? Is this quite common practice on here?"
We haven't found it common practice. We've only had it a couple of times and have assumed, they were more than likely actually single men.
Who's daft enough, to send a message like that from a couples profile when the other half could easily see it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's happened to me a few times and I have refused to meet them without consent. I really don't need the drama!"
Shouldn't lead to drama. I've never had any drama from it, just amazing fun times |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've often had the situation when I'm chatting to a couple that insist they only ever play together, but then the male half of the couple messages me privately as they only want to meet me behind their partners back? Is this quite common practice on here?"
Yes but no one's perfect. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Interesting....yet you are on here meeting people ? With no way of knowing whether those you meet are genuinely single or genuine couples ?...... as ive already said I try to make sure they are married to each other.. it some what limits options. Im not stupid but would never knowingly fuck someone elses partner and would have words with any woman trying it on with my guy behind my back.
And my decision goes for women playing away too.
There's no way that you can check they are married to each other and if you play in clubs as I see by your verifications that you do, there will be a lot of men in there who are married/attached or say otherwise. Your kidding yourself if you think people are honest with you
I have never said i think they are honest and guessing you dont read what is actually replied to you. As just said we do our best but under no illusions that at some point but it someone is up front that they are after a bit behind their partners back we choose to say no.. and do think playing with one half of a couple behind the other halfs on here is worse. As this lifestyle is all about trust when sharing with a partner.
I did fully read your post fully and replied appropriately with my own opinion. All I am saying is that people on here cheat a lot, it's bound to in this sort of lifestyle. If you feel you can trust people you meet then good for you, but personally speaking, I'm a lot more wary and I've minded to what actually goes on. Trust is a word casually thrown around my many people on here I'm afraid."
I trust no ones word on here... been here way to many years for that... but This post is about people blatantly cheating on their partner on here... and I wouldnt meet them and there is no doubt there as they are telling you its behind their back.
I have also said that I'd block anyone trying to meet either of us behind each others back.
I also have a code for how I treat other women on here and that includes never knowingly meeting someones partner behind their back. I would always confirm with any woman whose partner was saying and have no contact with a guy beyond what could be seen by his partner.
It works for me... and as I have said Im sure at some point i have played with a married man but id rather not and certainly wouldn't like some on here do see someone elses partner as a challenge |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Interesting....yet you are on here meeting people ? With no way of knowing whether those you meet are genuinely single or genuine couples ?...... as ive already said I try to make sure they are married to each other.. it some what limits options. Im not stupid but would never knowingly fuck someone elses partner and would have words with any woman trying it on with my guy behind my back.
And my decision goes for women playing away too.
There's no way that you can check they are married to each other and if you play in clubs as I see by your verifications that you do, there will be a lot of men in there who are married/attached or say otherwise. Your kidding yourself if you think people are honest with you
I have never said i think they are honest and guessing you dont read what is actually replied to you. As just said we do our best but under no illusions that at some point but it someone is up front that they are after a bit behind their partners back we choose to say no.. and do think playing with one half of a couple behind the other halfs on here is worse. As this lifestyle is all about trust when sharing with a partner.
I did fully read your post fully and replied appropriately with my own opinion. All I am saying is that people on here cheat a lot, it's bound to in this sort of lifestyle. If you feel you can trust people you meet then good for you, but personally speaking, I'm a lot more wary and I've minded to what actually goes on. Trust is a word casually thrown around my many people on here I'm afraid. I trust no ones word on here... been here way to many years for that... but This post is about people blatantly cheating on their partner on here... and I wouldnt meet them and there is no doubt there as they are telling you its behind their back.
I have also said that I'd block anyone trying to meet either of us behind each others back.
I also have a code for how I treat other women on here and that includes never knowingly meeting someones partner behind their back. I would always confirm with any woman whose partner was saying and have no contact with a guy beyond what could be seen by his partner.
It works for me... and as I have said Im sure at some point i have played with a married man but id rather not and certainly wouldn't like some on here do see someone elses partner as a challenge "
Each to their own, personally I love different challenges in life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's happened to me a few times and I have refused to meet them without consent. I really don't need the drama!
Shouldn't lead to drama. I've never had any drama from it, just amazing fun times "
But are you the female half of a swinging couple or just a married woman playing away?
There is more chance of your partner finding out if he's in here too then there would be drama |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's happened to me a few times and I have refused to meet them without consent. I really don't need the drama!
Shouldn't lead to drama. I've never had any drama from it, just amazing fun times
But are you the female half of a swinging couple or just a married woman playing away?
There is more chance of your partner finding out if he's in here too then there would be drama "
Im a married woman and if my husband was on here I'd love it, there would certainly be no drama. but unfortunately he isn't interested, hence I'm the illusive single fun on here |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's happened to me a few times and I have refused to meet them without consent. I really don't need the drama!
Shouldn't lead to drama. I've never had any drama from it, just amazing fun times
But are you the female half of a swinging couple or just a married woman playing away?
There is more chance of your partner finding out if he's in here too then there would be drama
Im a married woman and if my husband was on here I'd love it, there would certainly be no drama. but unfortunately he isn't interested, hence I'm the illusive single fun on here "
Single female even |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Swinging encourages cheating."
You should start a thread with that quote. That would certainly make some entertaining reading. I'm in full agreement with you by the way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swinging encourages cheating.
You should start a thread with that quote. That would certainly make some entertaining reading. I'm in full agreement with you by the way."
That is right and yeah, it would be a good one too to do. I might post it later  |
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"Swinging encourages cheating.
You should start a thread with that quote. That would certainly make some entertaining reading. I'm in full agreement with you by the way.That is right and yeah, it would be a good one too to do. I might post it later "
Looking forward to that thread .... I can't wait to see the sanctimonious who say swingers have the best relationships and everyone else is the pits ..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swinging encourages cheating.
You should start a thread with that quote. That would certainly make some entertaining reading. I'm in full agreement with you by the way."
Noooo quite the opposite we think |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Swinging encourages cheating.
You should start a thread with that quote. That would certainly make some entertaining reading. I'm in full agreement with you by the way.That is right and yeah, it would be a good one too to do. I might post it later
Looking forward to that thread .... I can't wait to see the sanctimonious who say swingers have the best relationships and everyone else is the pits ..... "
 |
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"I've often had the situation when I'm chatting to a couple that insist they only ever play together, but then the male half of the couple messages me privately as they only want to meet me behind their partners back? Is this quite common practice on here?"
Do many go through with the meet though? And is it that he wants you or a conquest ..... my OH doesn't meet women so I know he isn't hiding anything, although he does message them from his single profile .... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've often had the situation when I'm chatting to a couple that insist they only ever play together, but then the male half of the couple messages me privately as they only want to meet me behind their partners back? Is this quite common practice on here?
Do many go through with the meet though? And is it that he wants you or a conquest ..... my OH doesn't meet women so I know he isn't hiding anything, although he does message them from his single profile .... "
Yes one did go through with a meet. I don't know whether it was me or the conquest but either way, I had no regrets. I got what I needed and boy did he enjoy me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swinging encourages cheating.
You should start a thread with that quote. That would certainly make some entertaining reading. I'm in full agreement with you by the way.That is right and yeah, it would be a good one too to do. I might post it later
Looking forward to that thread .... I can't wait to see the sanctimonious who say swingers have the best relationships and everyone else is the pits .....
"
I have done it now |
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For me, nsa sex is just that ... I know he wouldn't do it and I wouldn't care anyway if he did. Something emotional would be different .... getting really close to another person. I have had a lot of illness recently, culminating in a hospital stay and I know he found it hard because I wasn't myself, but we were as strong as ever ... |
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By *illnatMan
over a year ago
wherever i need to be |
"ive had females from couples message me privately,and been tempted by a couple,but they were,nt quite my type,
now if a female whom I fancy messages me,i would,nt have an issue playing behind his back?? I know,i know morally wrong but hay I'm a man
As long as people have fun and no one is hurt, i don't have a moral issue. But not everyone is as open minded as me "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes loads do it.
I've had men in clubs asking me if I'm bi and I say no and they ask if I can pretend to be so he can fuck me, as they only play with single fems in a 3 way. Obviously the answer is no.
I've known people who have met someone who claimed to be single, even had a single account on here, the OH then finds out and then the drama comes.
For me it's a no, meant to be a couple swinging so shouldn't be going behind the partners back, they should be communicating and making sure they're doing what makes both happy. When I've played with a man from a couple I've always made sure the woman has been fine with it first. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes loads do it.
I've had men in clubs asking me if I'm bi and I say no and they ask if I can pretend to be so he can fuck me, as they only play with single fems in a 3 way. Obviously the answer is no.
I've known people who have met someone who claimed to be single, even had a single account on here, the OH then finds out and then the drama comes.
For me it's a no, meant to be a couple swinging so shouldn't be going behind the partners back, they should be communicating and making sure they're doing what makes both happy. When I've played with a man from a couple I've always made sure the woman has been fine with it first."
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By *ooking for bbwsCouple
over a year ago
secret garden chilling, always something to do in the garden |
"Happens very frequently. Doesn't bother me one bit, if the bloke is attractive then why not."
but wot if u get caught in the middle of it all????? Id just rather not know, or tell um to change to a single profile. |
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