FabSwingers.com
 

FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Socials on the rise

Socials on the rise

Jump to: Newest in thread

 

By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Is it just my imagination or has the need to have a social before a play multiplied .

I have no issue with socials I just remember my first meets way back were play

Social seems almost a must now.

Is it due to caution?

Not actually wanting to meet?

I don't know

Thoughts please

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *nceinawhileCouple  over a year ago

Ipswich

Personally we have social meets first because we only want to play with people we feel comfortable with

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I dunno but I wish people would behave demanding socials etc.

I travel all over the country so don't have time to waste on a social.

Me and my fuck buddy lives at opposite ends of the country. When we meet we get hotels for a couple of nights. No time for social.

Its couples and single women that want them. I personally hate socials. I dont really give any fucks about getting to know people unless they become regular.

Im here to fuck and be fucked. Not chat about hobbies over a glass of wine.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I dunno but I wish people would behave demanding socials etc.

I travel all over the country so don't have time to waste on a social.

Me and my fuck buddy lives at opposite ends of the country. When we meet we get hotels for a couple of nights. No time for social.

Its couples and single women that want them. I personally hate socials. I dont really give any fucks about getting to know people unless they become regular.

Im here to fuck and be fucked. Not chat about hobbies over a glass of wine. "

Time I moved house

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *VK_RugbyCouple  over a year ago

Rugby

We won't meet without a social first.

Every one is different, I would hope, although I sometimes wonder, 99% of us are here to experience sex with someone other than your partner, I (the male) won't put my wife at risk of having sex with a complete nut job, having a social first means you can gauge if they are normal, I hate labelling someone as normal but you know what I mean.

A social also takes away the, will they play won't they play on the first meet, assume won't and it's a bonus if you all click and it happens on the night.

There's a lot of couples that enjoy the socialising as much as the sex maybe it's the more mature (that's polite for old) couples looking for regular meets with people they click with socially as well as sexually, let's face it with the amount of timewasters on this site if you find a couple you like why not go back for more rather than waste more time looking for your next conquest.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I get why people have them though to establish attraction etc.

I prefer to just invite them over to hotel and then see what happens when they get to our room.

If we don't fancy each other then we just play with our own partners in front of each other which is still hot. Luckily we've never had a problem.

If i met couples alone then I might do one but never have with single men.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *andi_shopWoman  over a year ago

rotherham

I use socials to ensure that I'm attracted to the other person and vice versa, last thing I want is for any money and time to be wasted on arranging a hotel meet when there's no playing happening

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think socials are a good way of testing whether you like each other prior to a prospective meet. Nothing more awkward than just meeting someone who's expecting to play and you feel no attraction to them

Kinky

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *VK_RugbyCouple  over a year ago

Rugby


"I think socials are a good way of testing whether you like each other prior to a prospective meet. Nothing more awkward than just meeting someone who's expecting to play and you feel no attraction to them

Kinky "

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I use socials to ensure that I'm attracted to the other person and vice versa, last thing I want is for any money and time to be wasted on arranging a hotel meet when there's no playing happening "

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Socials don't appeal to me in the slightest, chatting on here for a bit to see if there's any connection work fine for us

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Socials don't appeal to me in the slightest, chatting on here for a bit to see if there's any connection work fine for us "

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm not a massive fan of socials so clubs work well for me in the sense that if we don't click then it doesn't necessarily mean the end of the night for either party

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *VK_RugbyCouple  over a year ago

Rugby

Looking at the replies so far it seems to be a couples thing more than singles maybe because couples have each other for sex regardless a social isn't such waste of time and money for them.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Better safe than sorry - is best reason for a social first - but I will admit there are the odd occasion when you instinctively know it fees right, which could/might do way with a social..

I have promoted social meets for ages , but mine purley out of very bad experiences

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't claim to be massively experienced in swinging but I am on dating sites. The reason I'd want a social is that you can't rely on photos to really encapsulate what a person is like. To be blunt I'm not interested in just playing with anyone. I'd need to be attracted to them both physically and to a degree mentally. You can't establish that without a meet...

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 14/09/16 14:47:09]

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think socials are a good way of testing whether you like each other prior to a prospective meet. Nothing more awkward than just meeting someone who's expecting to play and you feel no attraction to them

Kinky "

this yet i hate socials... I prefer clubs but enjoy the relaxation of having a hotel and inviting people over but i really dont like them stopping long

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Imperative to us first ,not into jumping eveyone just because we meet.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If I have a social, it's to establish whether there is an attraction and I will usually play on a first meet if there is...

If there isn't I will usually tell them to avoid any crossed wires

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ilk_TreMan  over a year ago

Wherever the party is!


"I dunno but I wish people would behave demanding socials etc.

I travel all over the country so don't have time to waste on a social.

Me and my fuck buddy lives at opposite ends of the country. When we meet we get hotels for a couple of nights. No time for social.

Its couples and single women that want them. I personally hate socials. I dont really give any fucks about getting to know people unless they become regular.

Im here to fuck and be fucked. Not chat about hobbies over a glass of wine. "

Googling "County Durham"...

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Everyone has there on preferences. For me I like a social to make sure there's some chemistry. That way I don't end up in a hotel room and have to make a rapid excuse as the person in front of me looks nothing like his pics and actually makes me sick in my mouth

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *eady and Willing 9Man  over a year ago

Wherever the party is @


"Personally we have social meets first because we only want to play with people we feel comfortable with"

Hit the nail on the head..thread closed lol

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Everyone has there on preferences. For me I like a social to make sure there's some chemistry. That way I don't end up in a hotel room and have to make a rapid excuse as the person in front of me looks nothing like his pics and actually makes me sick in my mouth "

Fancy stopping your age range at 44

Pain in the arse

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

People who like to have a social are compatible in at least one respect with others who like to have a social but not compatible at all with those that don't. I dont think it's too much of a problem

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'd always say a social first, but I have been known to zoom off to a Travelodge mid meet if the chemistry gets too much.

This is more likely to happen if you're a Scottish man. Scottish men are my weakness

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'd always say a social first, but I have been known to zoom off to a Travelodge mid meet if the chemistry gets too much.

This is more likely to happen if you're a Scottish man. Scottish men are my weakness "

Ock eye the noooo

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'd always say a social first, but I have been known to zoom off to a Travelodge mid meet if the chemistry gets too much.

This is more likely to happen if you're a Scottish man. Scottish men are my weakness

Ock eye the noooo"

Show us your Sporran

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'd always say a social first, but I have been known to zoom off to a Travelodge mid meet if the chemistry gets too much.

This is more likely to happen if you're a Scottish man. Scottish men are my weakness

Ock eye the noooo

Show us your Sporran "

I'll just pick up my hat

(Bends over)

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ngandnickCouple  over a year ago

Haverhill


"Personally we have social meets first because we only want to play with people we feel comfortable with"

This for us too

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is it just my imagination or has the need to have a social before a play multiplied .

I have no issue with socials I just remember my first meets way back were play

Social seems almost a must now.

Is it due to caution?

Not actually wanting to meet?

I don't know

Thoughts please"

Not for us .

We simply don't do socials .

If there's no opportunity to play if we gel on the first meet , the first meet doesn't happen .

Honestly can't see the point of them for us - we know what we want and the people we meet know what they want , so why waste an evening making small talk ?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ondonSwingSocialCouple  over a year ago

London

[Removed by poster at 14/09/16 18:51:55]

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ondonSwingSocialCouple  over a year ago

London

Everyone is different and do it for different reasons.

I host socials at bars that often lead to the entire or majority of the group going to a club after in a mass orgy type situation... it's often a fun night for all

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ynecplCouple  over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

It might be on the rise but we have always insisted on a social as we only want to play with people we feel comfortable with so no change in modus operandi for us.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Socials in general for a married man, such as I, just seem odd to me. If girls are local then I might offer a quick hello drive by just to put a voice to a photo, but these are rebuffed (aren't they SS) . Anything more than that and it's just to weird.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Tried to organise group socials and constantly check for them on Fab but no joy whatsoever, social dead zone this "neck of the woods". Think they are a good idea especially since personally speaking not particularly interested in going to clubs.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ackDMissMorganCouple  over a year ago

Halifax

Each to their own

We like to make sure theres attraction and we get on face to face ,before we agree to fun.

I think it would be really akward if you just met up at a hotel etc and there was no interest.

As a single on my old prof,it was for safety reasons too.

Miss

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ever since we started meeting men 3 years ago, we have always included the sexual experience as part of a social experience. Our regards our playmates as friends, so we normally have a drink or a bite to eat and then go somewhere private.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I dunno but I wish people would behave demanding socials etc.

I travel all over the country so don't have time to waste on a social.

Me and my fuck buddy lives at opposite ends of the country. When we meet we get hotels for a couple of nights. No time for social.

Its couples and single women that want them. I personally hate socials. I dont really give any fucks about getting to know people unless they become regular.

Im here to fuck and be fucked. Not chat about hobbies over a glass of wine. "

This.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Personally, all these apps and dating site and I think this place to are all drifting into main stream so it's all being toned down now.. When pof first started you could select 'casual encounter' specifically aimed at nsa sex.. Then they ditched it.. Then tinder came along and was branded a shag app and all the early 'dates' were pretty much about sex.. Now tinder Profiles are all squeaky clean and more normal mainstream dating same with badoo and all the rest.. Then the Ashley madison thing.. Why do you think this place is becoming so popular with non swingers??!! There will be something else for just the sex meets soon probably and it'll go same way. Sounds like having a sexual desire outside of a relationship is becoming taboo again... Weird..

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Personally, all these apps and dating site and I think this place to are all drifting into main stream so it's all being toned down now.. When pof first started you could select 'casual encounter' specifically aimed at nsa sex.. Then they ditched it.. Then tinder came along and was branded a shag app and all the early 'dates' were pretty much about sex.. Now tinder Profiles are all squeaky clean and more normal mainstream dating same with badoo and all the rest.. Then the Ashley madison thing.. Why do you think this place is becoming so popular with non swingers??!! There will be something else for just the sex meets soon probably and it'll go same way. Sounds like having a sexual desire outside of a relationship is becoming taboo again... Weird.. "

Great post

Think you've nailed it my friend

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Socials don't appeal to me in the slightest, chatting on here for a bit to see if there's any connection work fine for us "

Social only, don't appeal to us either, social with a view to play yes, but social with no option to play, no thank you.... It's not a dating game it's just naughty fun

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Personally, all these apps and dating site and I think this place to are all drifting into main stream so it's all being toned down now.. When pof first started you could select 'casual encounter' specifically aimed at nsa sex.. Then they ditched it.. Then tinder came along and was branded a shag app and all the early 'dates' were pretty much about sex.. Now tinder Profiles are all squeaky clean and more normal mainstream dating same with badoo and all the rest.. Then the Ashley madison thing.. Why do you think this place is becoming so popular with non swingers??!! There will be something else for just the sex meets soon probably and it'll go same way. Sounds like having a sexual desire outside of a relationship is becoming taboo again... Weird..

Great post

Think you've nailed it my friend "

But didn't this start as a swingers site? Merging socialising and sex has always been what swinging has traditionally been about. I got the impression more recently it has become less for swinging and more for sex with no socialising/friendship. Which is absalutely fine too - all a matter of personal choice.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *oxy_minxWoman  over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Social meet first for me (most of the time)

I find men send deceiving/blurry face pictures in the main, then I have my safety to factor in as well.

And yes I have had a bad experience before, so I have my reasons!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham


"Personally we have social meets first because we only want to play with people we feel comfortable with"

Same here, seems mental to meet for sex and discover you either don't get on or don't fancy each other

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham


"But didn't this start as a swingers site? Merging socialising and sex has always been what swinging has traditionally been about. I got the impression more recently it has become less for swinging and more for sex with no socialising/friendship. Which is absalutely fine too - all a matter of personal choice. "

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don't claim to be massively experienced in swinging but I am on dating sites. The reason I'd want a social is that you can't rely on photos to really encapsulate what a person is like. To be blunt I'm not interested in just playing with anyone. I'd need to be attracted to them both physically and to a degree mentally. You can't establish that without a meet..."

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

For me, I've generally always attracted people with my personality more than my looks, so a social situation is always going to be my go-to way of getting to know people and get into a sexual situation expecially with the amount of choice females and couples have on a site like this. I do visit clubs (rarely, I'm not made of money) and like the dynamic of being able to socialise then progress to playing. A club I used to attend was great as there were no membership charges for single guys, so made it much easier on the wallet and allowed me to be quite regular and get myself known.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Personally, all these apps and dating site and I think this place to are all drifting into main stream so it's all being toned down now.. When pof first started you could select 'casual encounter' specifically aimed at nsa sex.. Then they ditched it.. Then tinder came along and was branded a shag app and all the early 'dates' were pretty much about sex.. Now tinder Profiles are all squeaky clean and more normal mainstream dating same with badoo and all the rest.. Then the Ashley madison thing.. Why do you think this place is becoming so popular with non swingers??!! There will be something else for just the sex meets soon probably and it'll go same way. Sounds like having a sexual desire outside of a relationship is becoming taboo again... Weird..

Great post

Think you've nailed it my friend

But didn't this start as a swingers site? Merging socialising and sex has always been what swinging has traditionally been about. I got the impression more recently it has become less for swinging and more for sex with no socialising/friendship. Which is absalutely fine too - all a matter of personal choice. "

The reason I am drawn to swinging is because of the social side of sex, not wham bam encounters.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We've had vanilla socials, a kinky social where we swapped partners, a social with prospect of play, and a dive straight into play gamble that luckily worked out. So far none of the vanilla ones have been a success. Which makes us suspect you need a certain amount of flirtation to get a sense of chemistry. And the straight to play was fun. But the kinkiest and most rewarding experience by far was a kinky social that stopped short of play, as it left us both highly eroticised. This has made us realise there's a whole world of eroticism that many swingers overlook in their rush to get naked and soft or full swap. For us, then, the social, as well as being a good gauge of attraction, is a new part of a more erotic swinging experience.

Just thought we'd chip in as the assumption of the op was that socials were a backward move to something less Kinky... where for us it's the opposite.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I dunno but I wish people would behave demanding socials etc.

I travel all over the country so don't have time to waste on a social.

Me and my fuck buddy lives at opposite ends of the country. When we meet we get hotels for a couple of nights. No time for social.

Its couples and single women that want them. I personally hate socials. I dont really give any fucks about getting to know people unless they become regular.

Im here to fuck and be fucked. Not chat about hobbies over a glass of wine. "

classic! If I wanted a drink & a chat I'll do that with my nan with a cup of tea & a biscuit

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Personally, all these apps and dating site and I think this place to are all drifting into main stream so it's all being toned down now.. When pof first started you could select 'casual encounter' specifically aimed at nsa sex.. Then they ditched it.. Then tinder came along and was branded a shag app and all the early 'dates' were pretty much about sex.. Now tinder Profiles are all squeaky clean and more normal mainstream dating same with badoo and all the rest.. Then the Ashley madison thing.. Why do you think this place is becoming so popular with non swingers??!! There will be something else for just the sex meets soon probably and it'll go same way. Sounds like having a sexual desire outside of a relationship is becoming taboo again... Weird.. "
. To be honest there's more fucking going on in pof & tinder than here!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"We've had vanilla socials, a kinky social where we swapped partners, a social with prospect of play, and a dive straight into play gamble that luckily worked out. So far none of the vanilla ones have been a success. Which makes us suspect you need a certain amount of flirtation to get a sense of chemistry. And the straight to play was fun. But the kinkiest and most rewarding experience by far was a kinky social that stopped short of play, as it left us both highly eroticised. This has made us realise there's a whole world of eroticism that many swingers overlook in their rush to get naked and soft or full swap. For us, then, the social, as well as being a good gauge of attraction, is a new part of a more erotic swinging experience.

Just thought we'd chip in as the assumption of the op was that socials were a backward move to something less Kinky... where for us it's the opposite. "

All feels a bit plenty of fish these days

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Atm I prefer the social side of things. xxx

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Long live the social in our humble opinion.

Couldn't think of anything worse than inviting someone to our hotel room only to discover that we don't like them, they are smelly or suffer from being a complete dick.

Some people may be able to tell people to fuck off in this situation.

But alas we are far too polite and respectful.

It would be extremely akward and embarrasing.

We meet people who want to meet up socially first.

This ensures we are meeting people who are similar to us in thinking.

Random fuck and go is not for us thanks.

Mostly

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I always plan a social first. A lot easier to handle if there's a connection. I've had a lot of socials (too many) and only a very select few have ended in repeat visits

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

There's no way I'd meet without a social first. Several reasons.

1. Safety is Paramount. Even if they are verified.

2. I am not always attracted to them in person despite having liked there profiles. Equally they might not be attracted to me.

3. There may be a personality clash that you cannot gauge from a few messages. Or their kinks may entirely focus around something that is not your cup of tea.

Personally I need a level of comfort and trust in someone in order to let go.

That's just me!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *estmidscoupleCouple  over a year ago

West Midlands


"There's no way I'd meet without a social first. Several reasons.

1. Safety is Paramount. Even if they are verified.

2. I am not always attracted to them in person despite having liked there profiles. Equally they might not be attracted to me.

3. There may be a personality clash that you cannot gauge from a few messages. Or their kinks may entirely focus around something that is not your cup of tea.

Personally I need a level of comfort and trust in someone in order to let go.

That's just me! "

very well put, similar reasons for us, although safety is easier to maintain as a couple

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *iamondjoeMan  over a year ago

Glastonbury

Is "socials" a kind of disease brought about by careless intimacy with people you've just met, like gonorrhoea or mingling?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Used to meet without socials, the sex was ok.

Now we always have socials and the sex is amazing, you get to feel comfortable with the person, get to understand what makes them tick and you have the excitement of the build up between meets

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ucyfur77Woman  over a year ago

Pleasuretown

Common sense for a me as a single to have a social first

Safety first, meet and see how they are in person. All going well then..playtime

Fuck n' go ain't my thing

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *D835Man  over a year ago

London


"Socials don't appeal to me in the slightest, chatting on here for a bit to see if there's any connection work fine for us "

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Seems a bit inconclusive if socials are on the rise or not. If they are, then I guess that's what more people finds works. But on the whole it seems that some people enjoy the social aspect of the lifestyle and some don't. Best thing to do it stick with those who share the same approach. That's what we do.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *irty130Couple  over a year ago

Bristol Area

I think there's a difference between a social-only meet, and a meet where there is a social aspect to break the ice first.

I honestly can't see the point of going to meet a couple in a bar for a drink and a chat, and just going home again at the end.

But MOST of our meets are arranged to meet in a bar or similar, with loose plans of what could happen later. We have a drink and a flirt, and if everything goes well , but equally, it could be decided that it wasn't going to work out, and there's not the awkwardness of someone having to leave a more intimate situation.

If we've spent time to pick out our potential meets in advance, then the chance of things not working out is slim.

If there's no option for play, then it's almost like a date, and playing hard to get. *Ain't nobody got time for that!*

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don't claim to be massively experienced in swinging but I am on dating sites. The reason I'd want a social is that you can't rely on photos to really encapsulate what a person is like. To be blunt I'm not interested in just playing with anyone. I'd need to be attracted to them both physically and to a degree mentally. You can't establish that without a meet... "

Yes I agree but tbh that's what other regular dating sites are for that's how they work.. This is far more sex driven here but increasingly it's becoming more clean and mainstream on hear as the other sites become boring for their original target audience.. But yes I'd never imagine actually assuming sex on the first meet, I need to see and chat in the flesh first to get the fires burning. That's got to be normal surely lol

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think there's a difference between a social-only meet, and a meet where there is a social aspect to break the ice first.

I honestly can't see the point of going to meet a couple in a bar for a drink and a chat, and just going home again at the end.

But MOST of our meets are arranged to meet in a bar or similar, with loose plans of what could happen later. We have a drink and a flirt, and if everything goes well , but equally, it could be decided that it wasn't going to work out, and there's not the awkwardness of someone having to leave a more intimate situation.

If we've spent time to pick out our potential meets in advance, then the chance of things not working out is slim.

If there's no option for play, then it's almost like a date, and playing hard to get. *Ain't nobody got time for that!*"

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Personally, all these apps and dating site and I think this place to are all drifting into main stream so it's all being toned down now.. When pof first started you could select 'casual encounter' specifically aimed at nsa sex.. Then they ditched it.. Then tinder came along and was branded a shag app and all the early 'dates' were pretty much about sex.. Now tinder Profiles are all squeaky clean and more normal mainstream dating same with badoo and all the rest.. Then the Ashley madison thing.. Why do you think this place is becoming so popular with non swingers??!! There will be something else for just the sex meets soon probably and it'll go same way. Sounds like having a sexual desire outside of a relationship is becoming taboo again... Weird.. . To be honest there's more fucking going on in pof & tinder than here! "

Totally agree!!!!!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"We won't meet without a social first.

Every one is different, I would hope, although I sometimes wonder, 99% of us are here to experience sex with someone other than your partner, I (the male) won't put my wife at risk of having sex with a complete nut job, having a social first means you can gauge if they are normal, I hate labelling someone as normal but you know what I mean.

A social also takes away the, will they play won't they play on the first meet, assume won't and it's a bonus if you all click and it happens on the night.

There's a lot of couples that enjoy the socialising as much as the sex maybe it's the more mature (that's polite for old) couples looking for regular meets with people they click with socially as well as sexually, let's face it with the amount of timewasters on this site if you find a couple you like why not go back for more rather than waste more time looking for your next conquest."

This!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Although we haven't been on fab that long we always insist on a social. But we never rule out playing that same night.

The one and only time we broke our own rule turned into a disastrous evening that seriously had us considering calling it a day with the whole scene.

I suppose it's a case of once bitten, twice shy, but we are happy with the way we manage our meets and have met some fantastic people.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I do enjoy a social , its a chance to get to meet some one , who you may have talked to for a while.

an opportunity to share ideas and just get to know some one better

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

In 8 years of meeting all most every meet has had a social although quite often that social has evolved in to play the same evening. I've never really seem the point of a social and if you like each other arrangin a second meet to play although i understand that sometimes that is logistically easier.

The few times I've not bothered with a social have been people where there had been lots of chat but for one reason or another a social has been hard to arrange

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Time is precious

Everyone is busy

It can take months to arrange

And if it's for coffee

Then potententially months until another meet to play can be sorted out

By which time people move on

Leave

Ect ect

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Time is precious

Everyone is busy

It can take months to arrange

And if it's for coffee

Then potententially months until another meet to play can be sorted out

By which time people move on

Leave

Ect ect "

Then look for people who are looking for fuck and go meets. Or go to clubs.

People meet in different ways and beibg flexible is going to pay dividends over exoecting them to change. You do want a social, that's fine but they'll find plenty of others that will meet for one.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *it of fun cplCouple  over a year ago

village between York and Hull

For us it is about having a spark and also the fact that that pictures do not tell the full story. Back in the day when we used to meet without a social we have had a few dissapointments as have the guys we have met. People tend to get upset if you go on a blind a meet and day sorry not for us. It is also an added pressure. Having said that when we have arranged a social meet and liked the guy we have played at the first meet.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Time is precious

Everyone is busy

It can take months to arrange

And if it's for coffee

Then potententially months until another meet to play can be sorted out

By which time people move on

Leave

Ect ect

Then look for people who are looking for fuck and go meets. Or go to clubs.

People meet in different ways and beibg flexible is going to pay dividends over exoecting them to change. You do want a social, that's fine but they'll find plenty of others that will meet for one."

You assume way too much

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *axandbooCouple  over a year ago

Bristol

We have been messed about by timewasters. So with a social first at least that way i dont spend a few hours getting ready to be let down. It also shows that the other person is at least willing.

If they dont show then i can still have a nice night out with dax

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *heCuriousCoupleCouple  over a year ago

Costa Del Sol

We social partly for safety

Partly because just getting your cock, tits or pussy out isn't really enough.

Need to see if there's an attraction.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Time is precious

Everyone is busy

It can take months to arrange

And if it's for coffee

Then potententially months until another meet to play can be sorted out

By which time people move on

Leave

Ect ect "

We haven't found that's the case for us. But we normally have our social on the same night. We play at least once a month, and always play when we want to. No, we certainly don't find the social aspect to the swing scene hampers our play.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

  

By *andsonjohnMan  over a year ago

in the eye of the storm


"Time is precious

Everyone is busy

It can take months to arrange

And if it's for coffee

Then potententially months until another meet to play can be sorted out

By which time people move on

Leave

Ect ect

We haven't found that's the case for us. But we normally have our social on the same night. We play at least once a month, and always play when we want to. No, we certainly don't find the social aspect to the swing scene hampers our play. "

I have to agree with this.

I think the more you socialise with someone the better the sex becomes I like to have a drink and a flirt before fun even with a regular play partner for that reason .

but hay each to there own.

there is no right or wrong to this question its a case of do what works best for you and leads to the best out come for you .

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

» Add a new message to this topic

0.0937

0