FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Verifications - EGO vs For others
Verifications - EGO vs For others
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *WLondonMix OP Man
over a year ago
Willsden/DollisHill |
To be fair I find Verifications the equivalent to a huge slap on the back sometimes and honestly find it one of the greatest sytems that fabs have. Not only does it allow others to read other peeps opinions but is it just me or a good verification massage your ego and confidence too? I wonder if anyone has ever received a bad verification but decided not to show it? and should that be an option to choose from or should all verifications show? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I agree , verifications are a great tool, however sine if the ones I have read are hilariously OTT, there is a well known numpty in my area ( no names ) whose verifications can be 200 words long, but saying that he seem very successful on here  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"To be fair I find Verifications the equivalent to a huge slap on the back sometimes and honestly find it one of the greatest sytems that fabs have. Not only does it allow others to read other peeps opinions but is it just me or a good verification massage your ego and confidence too? I wonder if anyone has ever received a bad verification but decided not to show it? and should that be an option to choose from or should all verifications show? "
i just take them all with a pinch of salt because you get to choose which ones you show...
you could, for example, have 2 good ones and 10 awful ones, but since you only show the good it skews it all..
I only show ones which are non graphic... to be honest I don't want a play by play of what they did... although I like a verification as much as the next person, I'd still like a bit of discretion...
all I want out of a verification is to know that they were genuine, they are who they said they were, and the showed up.... nothing more nothing less
I don't need my ego stroked, I know need people to think I am "billy big bollocks" either......
Has a verification ever made a decision is to whether I meet that person or not...... no.. and it never will, cause in the end I would trust my own judgement over a verification anyday
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"To be fair I find Verifications the equivalent to a huge slap on the back sometimes and honestly find it one of the greatest sytems that fabs have. Not only does it allow others to read other peeps opinions but is it just me or a good verification massage your ego and confidence too? I wonder if anyone has ever received a bad verification but decided not to show it? and should that be an option to choose from or should all verifications show?
i just take them all with a pinch of salt because you get to choose which ones you show...
you could, for example, have 2 good ones and 10 awful ones, but since you only show the good it skews it all..
I only show ones which are non graphic... to be honest I don't want a play by play of what they did... although I like a verification as much as the next person, I'd still like a bit of discretion...
all I want out of a verification is to know that they were genuine, they are who they said they were, and the showed up.... nothing more nothing less
I don't need my ego stroked, I know need people to think I am "billy big bollocks" either......
Has a verification ever made a decision is to whether I meet that person or not...... no.. and it never will, cause in the end I would trust my own judgement over a verification anyday
"
Totally agree with you Fabio! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"To be fair I find Verifications the equivalent to a huge slap on the back sometimes and honestly find it one of the greatest sytems that fabs have. Not only does it allow others to read other peeps opinions but is it just me or a good verification massage your ego and confidence too? I wonder if anyone has ever received a bad verification but decided not to show it? and should that be an option to choose from or should all verifications show? "
we spoke to a lass on here last night who had been verified by a guy and offered to us on a sort of couple meet ,ie .he pairing up with her to meet us.
we approached her about it and she was livid,saying he was 12 yrs older than his profile , treated her like shit , she never had sex with him at thier meet but they both verified each other and said nice things.
veries are great but should be taken with a pinch of salt  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *WLondonMix OP Man
over a year ago
Willsden/DollisHill |
Billy big bolloxs lol I must admit I do find your posts some of the best as I admire the straight talking aspect of it.
Do you believe that verifications should show up even if bad? As you agreed it is bias in some respects. I think it should be an all or nothing if shown on a profile as if you have the verified tick you can have option to message the person who wish's to read them or choose to have each one on show?
Personally I don't rely on verifications for meets but they do help if many peoples opinions are the same or similar. Ie, in 3 verifications I get told am going to get kidnapped or not let go which must count for a little with some prospects. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"so if there are 2 very similar profiles but one is verified and the other unverified.. which would you choose to contact first?"
The verified one, that's my personal choice, i know verifications are subjective but I would rather have the opinion if a few people than no opinion at all |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"so if there are 2 very similar profiles but one is verified and the other unverified.. which would you choose to contact first?"
go for broke , tap them both , talk on phone
simples |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"so if there are 2 very similar profiles but one is verified and the other unverified.. which would you choose to contact first?
go for broke , tap them both , talk on phone
simples "
lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *WLondonMix OP Man
over a year ago
Willsden/DollisHill |
BTW if any forum mod reads this please deleat other 3 threads of this my blackberry got overly excited sorry. Or can anyone msg me the name of one? I know there's a honey something .. Who is nice but can't recall full username  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I like verifications but I treat them as a sort of thank you thing. I dont tend to read other peoples to be honest, even when Im arranging a meet and I would never rely on them.
We have never received a bad veri but is there a point in me saying that, whose going to prove it otherwise? I have had a veri from a guy I met at a party, nice guy, friendly etc, but not one that I wished to play with, but his veri to me read in such a way that we had played together. Something like, mmmm what a night, yes he did look as if he had a good night, but not with me he didnt, but he obviously enjoyed meeting me and that was really nice. I verified him too, he was a nice guy.
Im glad we have the verification system, we can all chose what we read into it  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *-and-KCouple
over a year ago
Back of Beyond |
They are a good system to show a couple/single actually turn up for a meeting when its arranged.
No way to falsify that is there.
We'll take more notice of a profile with several verifications in the last 12 months, rather than one with none.
Other than that you have to scope out the prospectives through communication. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"BTW if any forum mod reads this please deleat other 3 threads of this my blackberry got overly excited sorry. Or can anyone msg me the name of one? I know there's a honey something .. Who is nice but can't recall full username "
The name is Honeypotccouple...but if you need duplicate posts taken off and a mod isn't around , report the post. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"so if there are 2 very similar profiles but one is verified and the other unverified.. which would you choose to contact first?"
let me ask answer that question with a question... and expand that scenario a bit for real life accuracy
take you 2 very similar profiles...
1) one have no verifications... but has had great meet people who haven't been verified and so doesn't have the mythical tick... not done anything wrong by anyone so far
other has verifications... but is quite frankly an arse... has been rude to people, has let others down and have wasted a lot of peoples time...
now WHICH are you choosing???
the real answer to your questions is that both of those scenario's we know on here to be true... and that the true answer is to take those mythical ticks with a pinch of salt... which is the point i was making....
if people want to rely on a tick, there choice... however if that is the way they do it, then they can't come back and complain.....
I would always take my gut feeling, talk to them both and get to know them... I will always take my gut instinct and due diligence over verification..... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
My ego doesn't need massaging, and personally I'd be depressed if I had to rely on casual sex partners to make me feel good!
Verifications are of no interest to me whatsoever as they are made by total strangers who mean nothing to me. I would find it inconceivable to take the opinions of people I don't know into consideration when deciding who I allow into my home and bed.
Even on other sites with a verification system I tend to meet the unverified the most. The type of man I liked to meet was decided by his opening message and attitude not what other people said about him.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Billy big bolloxs lol I must admit I do find your posts some of the best as I admire the straight talking aspect of it.
Do you believe that verifications should show up even if bad? As you agreed it is bias in some respects. I think it should be an all or nothing if shown on a profile as if you have the verified tick you can have option to message the person who wish's to read them or choose to have each one on show?
Personally I don't rely on verifications for meets but they do help if many peoples opinions are the same or similar. Ie, in 3 verifications I get told am going to get kidnapped or not let go which must count for a little with some prospects."
don't worry... I just tell it like I see it, call it the "new yorker" in me...
do I personally think verifications should show the bad? well if you are going to show the good, then it would be a lot more realisitic... but then you have the vendictive side of people to deal with as well.... and you would get complaints if people got bad verifications....
like I said if at the moment someone had 2 good veri's and 10 bad ones.... at the moment you would only see the 2 good ones..... and as much as people say veri's are useful, they do show a rose tinted view.....and not the entire picture! which is why the pinch of salt line is used often...... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
There's some interesting points of view on this topic.
Verifications to us, are very important or, rather, the lack of them. We tend not to contact people who have been site members for a long time but are not verified by meeting. We know that people are often on more than one site but it's a good rule of thumb for us.
We also only verify people we meet. A lot of time & energy can go into organising "meets" & our time is important to us & free time is in short supply.
It's not a perfect system but it's a good indicator.
We agree with Fabio that "blow by blow" accounts are off putting but again, it's a good indication of the folk who post them. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
never had a bad one..... prob becasue we feel the same about ppeps we meet and dont like etc........ so just don't bother to send bad ones only good !!!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
had a guy compliment my veri list today..tho am sure he never read them properly, i have a few veris from social gatherings where there was no sex involved, from men ,tvs,womenof course not everyone verifies eachother or they just cant be bothered, its enough for me to know that i met them, and most i meet i still have the odd chat to,Its not everything but its one of the sites best features, if ppl actually READ them, and obviously make up their own minds. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ustyWoman
over a year ago
inverclyde |
i had to hide mine as a few guys read them them mesaging me about how it went, what we did and how good was the guy, prob one of the ones who just sit read and wank........ then one asked me if would contact one of my meets and see if he would meet a couple..... aye right so i will in there dreams |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"some of my verifications i have met a few times now and will meet as often as can"
same here lol..although only reverify if if its been a good while since meeting or theres something pretty special about the meet. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *athnBobCouple
over a year ago
sandwell |
One downside of the current system is that if a user leaves the site (deletes profile) the verification goes with them
You still show as verified but with no text. Not sure how this looks to others.
All three of our verifications have disappeared over the past 2 months. It would be nice if the text stayed even if it was attributed to 'user has left site". |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'l hold my hand up and say i've hidden a veri in the past. Not on this profile mind. I had a met that went well. But the guy was way to graffic in his veri. The number of mails went up. But the contence went down....  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
If having verifications boosts your ego, well good for you.... enjoy it.
My personal opinion..... they are not worth the server space they are written on, especially when it comes to working out who I want to meet.
How many verifications do you see which sound a bit like this:
"Fairly average sort of meet. Nothing special but still worth the effort of getting ready. A bit of a dribbler when kissing but pretty good oral skills... you do have to drop a big hint when you've had enough though. Overall a 5 out of 10.... might meet again if others are not available"
Not many hey!
Coz' let's face it... they are promoting themselves with what they type in your verification.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I would think some verification is better than none. Otherwise the profile could have been created by a machine for advertising purposes. Believe me it does happen on other sites.
I think getting your first verification may be a bit of a catch 22 situation. Few people want to meet someone unverified so they can't get their first verification so easily. I guess that is where classifying them into phone, webcam and met in person helps.
By the way as newcomer I don't yet have any verifications (other than the basic photo one). Would anyone like to chat or meet and perhaps verify me ( ) sometime. When I'm here I tend to hang out in the London chatroom on cam. I never thought to ask to be verified before. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
The real and probably better gauge of a meet is whether you would go back and meet them again 