FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > What are we supposed to do with a message if we don't know what the sender look like?
What are we supposed to do with a message if we don't know what the sender look like?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
So we state on our profile that we don't reply to messages unless we see a face pic. We don't ask anything that we are not prepared to do ourselves, and if it is us that makes the first move we will send our face pics. And our face pics are also in our 'friends' gallery.
But we get messages from guys, who have clearly read our profile, but don't attach a pic. Reasons vary. Some say 'face pic available upon request'. Others say they won't exchange pics until we have got to know each other. Other say they will only send via text or other medium, but not Fab.
This is all very well, and understand that people have different level of sensitivities and needs when it comes to privacy. But if we do not know what someone looks like when we get that first message, then how can our interest be sufficiently piqued to want to take it forward? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Obviously delete. Then turn your attention to the other messages you received in the last non-specified time period...
Oh and don't forget to block. No point deleting if you don't block as well. They might send you another message, and nobody wants that... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I don't understand the guys who read the profile, then message saying 'just wondered if you would be interested in me, I can send a picture if you want'. Well clearly I want it as it asks in my profile. Why not just send it in the first place? How am I supposed to decide otherwise? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If you're interested in what they have said,or what is on their profile,ask for a face photo."
They already asked on their profile.
It's a delete op, those that hide their faces usually have a reason for hiding them. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Maybe they don't send it first because men send a lot of messages that don't get replied to. Maybe reply photo please, you could be missing out on some good meets otherwise. With saying they will only send pic through other medium, probably want your contact details. I use Kik for chat as you can block people and don't have to give phone number.
XXX |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Maybe they don't send it first because men send a lot of messages that don't get replied to. Maybe reply photo please, you could be missing out on some good meets otherwise. With saying they will only send pic through other medium, probably want your contact details. I use Kik for chat as you can block people and don't have to give phone number.
XXX"
I've chatted to those who prefer to chat first but it has been pointless as I have found that when I have seen them, I don't want to chat further. I met someone who only sends pictures via another method but it didn't really look like him in person so when I start meeting again, no face picture with first message will just get deleted |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So we state on our profile that we don't reply to messages unless we see a face pic. We don't ask anything that we are not prepared to do ourselves, and if it is us that makes the first move we will send our face pics. And our face pics are also in our 'friends' gallery.
But we get messages from guys, who have clearly read our profile, but don't attach a pic. Reasons vary. Some say 'face pic available upon request'. Others say they won't exchange pics until we have got to know each other. Other say they will only send via text or other medium, but not Fab.
This is all very well, and understand that people have different level of sensitivities and needs when it comes to privacy. But if we do not know what someone looks like when we get that first message, then how can our interest be sufficiently piqued to want to take it forward?"
I get this too (as do so many others on here); you get a nice, interesting message from someone, but no pic. (And no, I don't think it's shallow to want to fancy the look of someone before you meet for sex.) The quandary is do you pursue it in case they are worth it or move on. If you have it on your profile that you would like a pic with the message, then they should respect that and if they can't or won't oblige, then they shouldn't really bother you. I do understand that people need to be discreet, (me as much as the next person), but at some point you have to trust that we are all on here for the same reason. Though I have read/heard some horror stories about people being outed and it makes it all that much harder for the rest of us. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We always get the face pics done first, at least that way we all know who's who, if we gain new friends and get a genuine meet then great, if peeps don't like our pics there welcome to move on. Saves any awkwardness in the long run |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Thanks for everybody's responses. It was more of a rhetorical question stemmed from irritation that a plea for advise. We do delete messages without face pics, but good to hear that the thought of a blind date is equally undesirable to most. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Maybe they don't send it first because men send a lot of messages that don't get replied to. Maybe reply photo please, you could be missing out on some good meets otherwise. With saying they will only send pic through other medium, probably want your contact details. I use Kik for chat as you can block people and don't have to give phone number.
XXX
I've chatted to those who prefer to chat first but it has been pointless as I have found that when I have seen them, I don't want to chat further. I met someone who only sends pictures via another method but it didn't really look like him in person so when I start meeting again, no face picture with first message will just get deleted"
This is fundamentally how we feel. If we chat first and get on well, then what do we do when we eventually exchange pictures. How embarrassing and disappointing to go to all that effort to find someone doesn't fancy the other. No, it is so much better to exchange pics at the first, so as to not waste time on someone you don't like. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don't understand the guys who read the profile, then message saying 'just wondered if you would be interested in me, I can send a picture if you want'. Well clearly I want it as it asks in my profile. Why not just send it in the first place? How am I supposed to decide otherwise?"
This is also how I feel. A guy once said to us, that he would send a picture if we were interested. And I thought, well how do I know if I'm interested without the picture. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Are u as quick to bin other couples or females that message u without pics ?
Or just us pesky nuisance guys"
Hasn't really come up, as we never meet couples or women privately. But I think if we were interested in couples we would want to know what they look like before embarking on a chat. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
