FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Is this a sex site?
Is this a sex site?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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This is not a critique on how anyone uses this site currently. But I have read this is not a sex site but a swinging site many times on the forums and it's piqued my interest.
When I first began my journey into swinging. I used a few swinging/sex site to supplement my vanilla dating. I was using these site's to explore non monogamous forms of sex. Which can't be found on conventional dating sites.
So I decided to join many websites to find people to have sex with. It made me a better person because during my vanilla dates. I wasn't looking for sex , and it allowed me time to really get to know a woman's mind and soul.
Over the years I have met some great people and some are still my friends today. But the common factor is that we had great sex first , then became friends later.
So please tell me who among us decided to sign up to a swinger site . With the intentions of not having sex 
But to go to clubs , organized socials , party's , and meet people you're not attracted too .. for socializing and build long term friends.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It can be whatever you want, not everyone meets, not everyone swings even if they meet for sex. It's down to personal interpretation and personal choice. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is not a critique on how anyone uses this site currently. But I have read this is not a sex site but a swinging site many times on the forums and it's piqued my interest.
When I first began my journey into swinging. I used a few swinging/sex site to supplement my vanilla dating. I was using these site's to explore non monogamous forms of sex. Which can't be found on conventional dating sites.
So I decided to join many websites to find people to have sex with. It made me a better person because during my vanilla dates. I wasn't looking for sex , and it allowed me time to really get to know a woman's mind and soul.
Over the years I have met some great people and some are still my friends today. But the common factor is that we had great sex first , then became friends later.
So please tell me who among us decided to sign up to a swinger site . With the intentions of not having sex
But to go to clubs , organized socials , party's , and meet people you're not attracted too .. for socializing and build long term friends.
I didn't, I joined for sex
"
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We signed up in the hopes of achieving both sex and friendship but it's not so far been possible. I wonder if it's because quite a few people feel as you do that sex gets in the way of properly knowing a person.
Not related to your question but in a non critical way I wonder why you feel not having sex with the woman you're dating makes you a better person.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We signed up in the hopes of achieving both sex and friendship but it's not so far been possible. I wonder if it's because quite a few people feel as you do that sex gets in the way of properly knowing a person.
Not related to your question but in a non critical way I wonder why you feel not having sex with the woman you're dating makes you a better person. "
I wonder if those women would think, "oh how fantastic, we're not having sex because he's off fucking a load of other women just so we don't have to, what a gentleman"  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think what people mean when they say it is not a 'sex site' is that it is not intended as a sex dating site aimed at 1-2-1 meetings although a lot of people use it as that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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good question OP and i am sure you will get many different answers.
We of course signed up for sex, but the deeper into the scene you get. the less important the sex itself becomes.
For example in the early days if we didnt play then we were worried we were doing or saying something wrong, but as time goes by we continue to be ourselves and are really not worried about the outcome of any meets.
we are quite capable of having a good time on our own, and most of the time just being around like minded folk is good enough for us to have fun and be true to ourselves and say that was a good evening.
Hope that makes sense, but i guess what am trying to say that like most things in life, it is better shared with people you really like.
If you get on with someone on a platonic level, then attraction can come from unlikely places. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It depends on the individual on how they use the site get fed up of all the different labels that people use x"
Please read my opening statement again. I'm not criticizing how you use the site. I'm asking if you signed up to this site for sex as a priority. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"as a single i quite often go just to see friends and would stay even when not meeting "
But did your friends make you come here? Or did you come here on your own? |
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"We signed up in the hopes of achieving both sex and friendship but it's not so far been possible. I wonder if it's because quite a few people feel as you do that sex gets in the way of properly knowing a person.
Not related to your question but in a non critical way I wonder why you feel not having sex with the woman you're dating makes you a better person.
I wonder if those women would think, "oh how fantastic, we're not having sex because he's off fucking a load of other women just so we don't have to, what a gentleman" "
They might also think "thank God a man who isn't trying it on every five minutes and is happy just to talk". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It depends on the individual on how they use the site get fed up of all the different labels that people use x
Please read my opening statement again. I'm not criticizing how you use the site. I'm asking if you signed up to this site for sex as a priority. "
I discovered the clubs before I found fab and enjoy it socially as well as sexually. Still swinging with couples and guys I have known well over ten years now and still loving it x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We signed up in the hopes of achieving both sex and friendship but it's not so far been possible. I wonder if it's because quite a few people feel as you do that sex gets in the way of properly knowing a person.
Not related to your question but in a non critical way I wonder why you feel not having sex with the woman you're dating makes you a better person.
I wonder if those women would think, "oh how fantastic, we're not having sex because he's off fucking a load of other women just so we don't have to, what a gentleman"
They might also think "thank God a man who isn't trying it on every five minutes and is happy just to talk"."
Haha maybe, but if i was dating i'd want the sex too  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We signed up in the hopes of achieving both sex and friendship but it's not so far been possible. I wonder if it's because quite a few people feel as you do that sex gets in the way of properly knowing a person.
Not related to your question but in a non critical way I wonder why you feel not having sex with the woman you're dating makes you a better person.
I wonder if those women would think, "oh how fantastic, we're not having sex because he's off fucking a load of other women just so we don't have to, what a gentleman" "
I think you are grossly mistaken or something in my post got lost in translation.
I don't care how you use this site. I wanted to know what was the primary reason you signed up.
When meeting people for vanilla dates . I don't unload my baggage and drama until I see a serious relationship potential. Setting up a late night sex meet . Allowed me the opportunity to go on a vanilla date and actually listen to what the woman was saying , rather than just saying the right things just to sleep with her. When you are not trying to sleep with a woman . You can suss out the crazy ones very fast. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"good question OP and i am sure you will get many different answers.
We of course signed up for sex, but the deeper into the scene you get. the less important the sex itself becomes.
For example in the early days if we didnt play then we were worried we were doing or saying something wrong, but as time goes by we continue to be ourselves and are really not worried about the outcome of any meets.
we are quite capable of having a good time on our own, and most of the time just being around like minded folk is good enough for us to have fun and be true to ourselves and say that was a good evening.
Hope that makes sense, but i guess what am trying to say that like most things in life, it is better shared with people you really like.
If you get on with someone on a platonic level, then attraction can come from unlikely places. "
Great post.. Thank you.
It's funny because most of the people that say this is a swinging site , not a sex site have been swinging for a few years. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We signed up in the hopes of achieving both sex and friendship but it's not so far been possible. I wonder if it's because quite a few people feel as you do that sex gets in the way of properly knowing a person.
Not related to your question but in a non critical way I wonder why you feel not having sex with the woman you're dating makes you a better person.
I wonder if those women would think, "oh how fantastic, we're not having sex because he's off fucking a load of other women just so we don't have to, what a gentleman"
They might also think "thank God a man who isn't trying it on every five minutes and is happy just to talk"."
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We signed up in the hopes of achieving both sex and friendship but it's not so far been possible. I wonder if it's because quite a few people feel as you do that sex gets in the way of properly knowing a person.
Not related to your question but in a non critical way I wonder why you feel not having sex with the woman you're dating makes you a better person.
I wonder if those women would think, "oh how fantastic, we're not having sex because he's off fucking a load of other women just so we don't have to, what a gentleman"
I think you are grossly mistaken or something in my post got lost in translation.
I don't care how you use this site. I wanted to know what was the primary reason you signed up.
When meeting people for vanilla dates . I don't unload my baggage and drama until I see a serious relationship potential. Setting up a late night sex meet . Allowed me the opportunity to go on a vanilla date and actually listen to what the woman was saying , rather than just saying the right things just to sleep with her. When you are not trying to sleep with a woman . You can suss out the crazy ones very fast. "
When i was dating my partner we had lovely dates where we talked, and yes he listened to what i was saying, then we had great sex after.
You can have it all you know |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We signed up in the hopes of achieving both sex and friendship but it's not so far been possible. I wonder if it's because quite a few people feel as you do that sex gets in the way of properly knowing a person.
Not related to your question but in a non critical way I wonder why you feel not having sex with the woman you're dating makes you a better person.
I wonder if those women would think, "oh how fantastic, we're not having sex because he's off fucking a load of other women just so we don't have to, what a gentleman"
I think you are grossly mistaken or something in my post got lost in translation.
I don't care how you use this site. I wanted to know what was the primary reason you signed up.
When meeting people for vanilla dates . I don't unload my baggage and drama until I see a serious relationship potential. Setting up a late night sex meet . Allowed me the opportunity to go on a vanilla date and actually listen to what the woman was saying , rather than just saying the right things just to sleep with her. When you are not trying to sleep with a woman . You can suss out the crazy ones very fast.
When i was dating my partner we had lovely dates where we talked, and yes he listened to what i was saying, then we had great sex after.
You can have it all you know "
Dating is much different now. By the time you go on your first date , you know everything about each other via Facebook. So after one date women want to move and have babies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We signed up in the hopes of achieving both sex and friendship but it's not so far been possible. I wonder if it's because quite a few people feel as you do that sex gets in the way of properly knowing a person.
Not related to your question but in a non critical way I wonder why you feel not having sex with the woman you're dating makes you a better person.
I wonder if those women would think, "oh how fantastic, we're not having sex because he's off fucking a load of other women just so we don't have to, what a gentleman"
I think you are grossly mistaken or something in my post got lost in translation.
I don't care how you use this site. I wanted to know what was the primary reason you signed up.
When meeting people for vanilla dates . I don't unload my baggage and drama until I see a serious relationship potential. Setting up a late night sex meet . Allowed me the opportunity to go on a vanilla date and actually listen to what the woman was saying , rather than just saying the right things just to sleep with her. When you are not trying to sleep with a woman . You can suss out the crazy ones very fast.
When i was dating my partner we had lovely dates where we talked, and yes he listened to what i was saying, then we had great sex after.
You can have it all you know
Dating is much different now. By the time you go on your first date , you know everything about each other via Facebook. So after one date women want to move and have babies "
We've only been together three years lol, but both had our babies previously so maybe it's different when you're older. I like sex, I'd be bored dating without sex,
In answer to your original question yes we joined for sex as we both enjoy it, and also to give me the opportunity to watch two guys together  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well OP you beat me to it. I was thinking of initiating a similar forum discussion
We originally signed up to Fab for Hotwifing. We used to use Craig's List to find men, and had a couple of good experiences, but mostly crap. Then someone recommended Fab to us. However, my husband was also keen to get back into swinging, which he had done with his first wife and for a short period of time as a single man. So after a few months using Fab for Hotwifing purposes, we had made some contacts, and gradually I dipped my toes in sex parties. These days we use Fab about 2/3 for swing parties and 1/3 for Hotwifing. But we've also taken an interest in D/s, so Fab has been a good vehicle for that.
But either way it is very rare for us to not play if we meet someone or attend a party. So definately we use Fab for sex. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I signed up for NSA sex but I'm still a bit wary after a bad experience I had on another site and I struggle a bit meeting people because I'm shy.
My availability is pretty dire though and I'm very limited as to when I can meet, add in that I can't accommodate and it's a real faff. |
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Sex, sex, sex and plenty of sex. Sociologists say you do not do anything to make friends. Friendship happens. You either allow/ nourish it or you don't.
There are enough friends from normal life pools: school mates, work mates, neighbours, friends of friends, interest groups, etc.
Nobody joins a sex site to make friends. Friendship happens - aristotle. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is not a critique on how anyone uses this site currently. But I have read this is not a sex site but a swinging site many times on the forums and it's piqued my interest.
When I first began my journey into swinging. I used a few swinging/sex site to supplement my vanilla dating. I was using these site's to explore non monogamous forms of sex. Which can't be found on conventional dating sites.
So I decided to join many websites to find people to have sex with. It made me a better person because during my vanilla dates. I wasn't looking for sex , and it allowed me time to really get to know a woman's mind and soul.
Over the years I have met some great people and some are still my friends today. But the common factor is that we had great sex first , then became friends later.
So please tell me who among us decided to sign up to a swinger site . With the intentions of not having sex
But to go to clubs , organized socials , party's , and meet people you're not attracted too .. for socializing and build long term friends.
"
"A better person"? Hm... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Whether this is a sex site or a swing site is probably up to the individual. Although swinging involves sex, sex does not necessarily involve swinging. I'm guessing this website, judging by its name, started off as a sex site specialised for swingers. The urban dictionary describes swinging as 'a lifestyle of non-monogany where sexual relations occur outside the established couple'. But the website has probably evolved to include NSA and alternative sex of any kind.
I tend to think the bigger question is the definition of NSA. I don't think NSA has anything to do with friendship. Most people we play with we regard as friends, and we personally haven't found that friendship and NSA sex interfere with each other. Others prefer to keep liaisons as just sex. Historically I think swinging involved couples who were friends and swapped partners. But I'm not sure. Besides as I said swinging has evolved.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"This is not a critique on how anyone uses this site currently. But I have read this is not a sex site but a swinging site many times on the forums and it's piqued my interest.
When I first began my journey into swinging. I used a few swinging/sex site to supplement my vanilla dating. I was using these site's to explore non monogamous forms of sex. Which can't be found on conventional dating sites.
So I decided to join many websites to find people to have sex with. It made me a better person because during my vanilla dates. I wasn't looking for sex , and it allowed me time to really get to know a woman's mind and soul.
Over the years I have met some great people and some are still my friends today. But the common factor is that we had great sex first , then became friends later.
So please tell me who among us decided to sign up to a swinger site . With the intentions of not having sex
But to go to clubs , organized socials , party's , and meet people you're not attracted too .. for socializing and build long term friends.
"A better person"? Hm..."
You know better person is subjective |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Whether this is a sex site or a swing site is probably up to the individual. Although swinging involves sex, sex does not necessarily involve swinging. I'm guessing this website, judging by its name, started off as a sex site specialised for swingers. The urban dictionary describes swinging as 'a lifestyle of non-monogany where sexual relations occur outside the established couple'. But the website has probably evolved to include NSA and alternative sex of any kind.
I tend to think the bigger question is the definition of NSA. I don't think NSA has anything to do with friendship. Most people we play with we regard as friends, and we personally haven't found that friendship and NSA sex interfere with each other. Others prefer to keep liaisons as just sex. Historically I think swinging involved couples who were friends and swapped partners. But I'm not sure. Besides as I said swinging has evolved.
"
Spot on ..... Swinging has evolved . When I started 8 years ago. People actually logged on websites when they were looking for sex. I could go out to a vanilla event and If I didn't meet anyone . I could log on and find someone ready to meet. The best meets I've had were after 12AM.
Now most people want to talk for weeks , meet for coffee , meet for lunch , and travel hundreds of miles for sex.
I'm not looking for a free sex worker.I'm not looking to go to a organized social. I'm not looking to travel 100's of miles and book a hotel. I'm not looking to meet you for lunch or coffee.
I'm looking for someone who is near by that wants to have sex , and if it's great we can become fwb. This can be accomplished by a quick phone chat and a meeting for a drink with a chance to play after. 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is not a critique on how anyone uses this site currently. But I have read this is not a sex site but a swinging site many times on the forums and it's piqued my interest.
When I first began my journey into swinging. I used a few swinging/sex site to supplement my vanilla dating. I was using these site's to explore non monogamous forms of sex. Which can't be found on conventional dating sites.
So I decided to join many websites to find people to have sex with. It made me a better person because during my vanilla dates. I wasn't looking for sex , and it allowed me time to really get to know a woman's mind and soul.
Over the years I have met some great people and some are still my friends today. But the common factor is that we had great sex first , then became friends later.
So please tell me who among us decided to sign up to a swinger site . With the intentions of not having sex
But to go to clubs , organized socials , party's , and meet people you're not attracted too .. for socializing and build long term friends.
"
Brilliant Post!
No we didn't sign up to make friends and attend parties for no sex .
It's a sex site for us ..... and we love it |
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"Whether this is a sex site or a swing site is probably up to the individual. Although swinging involves sex, sex does not necessarily involve swinging. I'm guessing this website, judging by its name, started off as a sex site specialised for swingers. The urban dictionary describes swinging as 'a lifestyle of non-monogany where sexual relations occur outside the established couple'. But the website has probably evolved to include NSA and alternative sex of any kind.
I tend to think the bigger question is the definition of NSA. I don't think NSA has anything to do with friendship. Most people we play with we regard as friends, and we personally haven't found that friendship and NSA sex interfere with each other. Others prefer to keep liaisons as just sex. Historically I think swinging involved couples who were friends and swapped partners. But I'm not sure. Besides as I said swinging has evolved.
Spot on ..... Swinging has evolved . When I started 8 years ago. People actually logged on websites when they were looking for sex. I could go out to a vanilla event and If I didn't meet anyone . I could log on and find someone ready to meet. The best meets I've had were after 12AM.
Now most people want to talk for weeks , meet for coffee , meet for lunch , and travel hundreds of miles for sex.
I'm not looking for a free sex worker.I'm not looking to go to a organized social. I'm not looking to travel 100's of miles and book a hotel. I'm not looking to meet you for lunch or coffee.
I'm looking for someone who is near by that wants to have sex , and if it's great we can become fwb. This can be accomplished by a quick phone chat and a meeting for a drink with a chance to play after.
"
That's great. Other people do it differently, that's great too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I joined for the n.s.a sex and found clubs and parties advertising on here,which I have found it easier to find what and who I want
Alot easier than going through the mission of finding someone from here,I just go to a club and chat for real and have sex
Not that I do that much now I've turned into one of those party organisers,organising parties for others to socialize and have sex,I'm nice like that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I came ultimately for sex.....i have no need to look for more friends but friendships do develop, and that's great, but it's as a by-product to the sex for me. It would never have occurred to me to sign up to a swingers site if i didn't want sex. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I came ultimately for sex.....i have no need to look for more friends but friendships do develop, and that's great, but it's as a by-product to the sex for me. It would never have occurred to me to sign up to a swingers site if i didn't want sex. "
This |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
the great thing is that it is not necessarily an either/or answer... and the site will mean different things to different people....
and there are enough people here with the same opinion that those people can find each other... whether that they see it as a swinging site or those that see it as a sex site...
me... came initially for the sex, but most definately stayed for the social aspect and that opened many more doors than just the flat out blinkered sex ever did....
no right or wrong answer... you make of it what you make of it.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We signed up to make friends with people who share our _iews on non monogamy. Whether that ever leads to actually having sex with those people, who knows but we'll have fun finding out |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The part of "it's a sex site" that I object to is when guys use that to mean "but I've sent you 3 pics of my dick, what else can it take for you to meet me?!" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Swinging, also known as wife swapping or partner swapping, is a non-monogamous behavior in which both singles and partners in a committed relationship engage in sexual activities with others as a recreational or social activity ~ Definition of swinging
Fabswingers is a sex site just a fact! But how people choose to use it is entirely up to them.
But if you call yourself a swinger but dont have sex with other people or just on here to chat then you are not a swinger.
Also if ur single your not a swinger ur just a mad shagger |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swinging, also known as wife swapping or partner swapping, is a non-monogamous behavior in which both singles and partners in a committed relationship engage in sexual activities with others as a recreational or social activity ~ Definition of swinging
Fabswingers is a sex site just a fact! But how people choose to use it is entirely up to them.
But if you call yourself a swinger but dont have sex with other people or just on here to chat then you are not a swinger.
Also if ur single your not a swinger ur just a mad shagger "
I'm not mad! Just a bit deranged  and I'm here for the sex,although I don't do quick off the mark meets. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its a sex site simple as that
Their is some people that are so far up their own ass. They think its offensive to see cock and pussy pics
LOL"
No, they just don't find this is how a gentleman should introduce himself to anyone. |
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"Its a sex site simple as that
Their is some people that are so far up their own ass. They think its offensive to see cock and pussy pics
LOL
No, they just don't find this is how a gentleman should introduce himself to anyone."
Not here to find a wife luv
I'm here to fuk and its as simple as that
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm Joe, I'm an alcoholic, it's been 36hrs since my last drink and I think I might be on the wrong site?"
Hang on a minute....someone will be along soon to tell you you shouldn't drink and sex.... |
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So please tell me who among us decided to sign up to a swinger site . With the intentions of not having sex
But to go to clubs , organized socials , party's , and meet people you're not attracted too .. for socializing and build long term friends.
I love this.it brought a smile to my face..
Its definitley a sex site in our opinion.we swing because we love sex with each other andother people..we didnt sign up to just make friends.if we do thats good.if we dont then its onto the next sex filled session.Our M.O is to turn up and fuck.if the fucking is good then shit we will hang around and socialise. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"This is not a critique on how anyone uses this site currently. But I have read this is not a sex site but a swinging site many times on the forums and it's piqued my interest.
When I first began my journey into swinging. I used a few swinging/sex site to supplement my vanilla dating. I was using these site's to explore non monogamous forms of sex. Which can't be found on conventional dating sites.
So I decided to join many websites to find people to have sex with. It made me a better person because during my vanilla dates. I wasn't looking for sex , and it allowed me time to really get to know a woman's mind and soul.
Over the years I have met some great people and some are still my friends today. But the common factor is that we had great sex first , then became friends later.
So please tell me who among us decided to sign up to a swinger site . With the intentions of not having sex
But to go to clubs , organized socials , party's , and meet people you're not attracted too .. for socializing and build long term friends.
Brilliant Post!
No we didn't sign up to make friends and attend parties for no sex .
It's a sex site for us ..... and we love it "
Yeah, but everyone wants to shag you guys. What would you do if you weren't so sexually attractive? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I signed up for sex, and got that.
Noe i stay coz... idk why coz i don't want NSA anything.
Not being funny but I know a good speech therapist "
was rushing to post that, no-one reads your shit on here unless it's to slag you of or start an argument anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Its a sex site simple as that
Their is some people that are so far up their own ass. They think its offensive to see cock and pussy pics
LOL
No, they just don't find this is how a gentleman should introduce himself to anyone."
Just because we're on a swingers site doesn't mean all sense of manners and decorum have to go out the fucking window. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Its a sex site simple as that
Their is some people that are so far up their own ass. They think its offensive to see cock and pussy pics
LOL"
And some are so stupid and crass they think that's all they should need to do to get someone to have sex with them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We signed up in the hopes of achieving both sex and friendship but it's not so far been possible. I wonder if it's because quite a few people feel as you do that sex gets in the way of properly knowing a person.
Not related to your question but in a non critical way I wonder why you feel not having sex with the woman you're dating makes you a better person.
I wonder if those women would think, "oh how fantastic, we're not having sex because he's off fucking a load of other women just so we don't have to, what a gentleman" "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"good question OP and i am sure you will get many different answers.
We of course signed up for sex, but the deeper into the scene you get. the less important the sex itself becomes.
For example in the early days if we didnt play then we were worried we were doing or saying something wrong, but as time goes by we continue to be ourselves and are really not worried about the outcome of any meets.
we are quite capable of having a good time on our own, and most of the time just being around like minded folk is good enough for us to have fun and be true to ourselves and say that was a good evening.
Hope that makes sense, but i guess what am trying to say that like most things in life, it is better shared with people you really like.
If you get on with someone on a platonic level, then attraction can come from unlikely places. "
Well said |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Its a sex site simple as that
Their is some people that are so far up their own ass. They think its offensive to see cock and pussy pics
LOL
No, they just don't find this is how a gentleman should introduce himself to anyone."
I know a lady who never liked seeing cock shots...not cos they offended her but cos she was a nurse and would automatically start assessing the clinical state of a red bell end! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It depends on the individual on how they use the site get fed up of all the different labels that people use x
Please read my opening statement again. I'm not criticizing how you use the site. I'm asking if you signed up to this site for sex as a priority. "
You do seem to separate sex and swinging as two separate things.....they are not.
I don't go to clubs, socials, parties etc to meet people I would not have sex with. I do meet these people...but also plenty I would and do.
I too have many friends which I've met on here...most of which ive had sex with.
My three closest lady friends (currently) are also ladies I have/do have sex with. I think that, for me, is what swinging is about. Friendship and sex...but without any hang ups.
Couple of years back I had one won and stayed over at mine on the Friday night. Another turned up on the Saturday while the first was still here....they had met before but we're not "friends"...though they are now. While they were here I got a booty call from another of my friends....I went to see her for a couple of hours, came back and the other two were getting on like a house on fire. The three of us had a bit of fun. First woman went home, second one stayed over Saturday night. On Sunday we went for a pub lunch and met up with the third lady for drinks......to me THAT is a good example of what swinging is about and the way you can use this site to suit yourself.
The "dating" diets to be fair, do seem to be about meeting people just the once to have sex and then move on.....very few guys on there looking for relationships as from what ice heard most already have that but the OH doesn't know.
Starting to make inroads here....but ladies tend to be wiser me thinks! |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"It's a sex site" is usually used to justify certain types of behaviour by those exhibiting that behaviour; usually when their behaviour is criticised or challenged.
The people who persist in perpetuating such behaviour would rather blame the prudishness of others when they are challenged over their actions, than examine their behaviour and their attitudes to others.
Even if we conclude this is "a sex site", does that, or should that, justify crass, entitled or otherwise unpleasant behaviour?
I think not.
The question, I believe, is not whether this is a sex site but why some believe that stating it is excuses certain types of behaviour, and why it means anyone objecting to that behaviour must be a prude/not here for sex/arrogant/stuck up/any one of a hundred other accusations. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
""It's a sex site" is usually used to justify certain types of behaviour by those exhibiting that behaviour; usually when their behaviour is criticised or challenged.
The people who persist in perpetuating such behaviour would rather blame the prudishness of others when they are challenged over their actions, than examine their behaviour and their attitudes to others.
Even if we conclude this is "a sex site", does that, or should that, justify crass, entitled or otherwise unpleasant behaviour?
I think not.
The question, I believe, is not whether this is a sex site but why some believe that stating it is excuses certain types of behaviour, and why it means anyone objecting to that behaviour must be a prude/not here for sex/arrogant/stuck up/any one of a hundred other accusations."
You have a future in politics. You would be a great public relations person for any politician during a scandal. I have never read anyone spinning facts as much as you do..
People sign up to this site for sex.
If you are not looking for sex . You don't belong here. If you're not meeting , hide your profile and go do something constructive. Way too many profiles saying not meeting at the moment. Add your fab friends on Facebook and leave the rest of us on fab to meet and have sex.
Now to my original point. Just because I may buy a piece of fish at the supermarket. Doesn't mean the super market is now a fish market
Don't turn fab into a fish market... |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"You have a future in politics. You would be a great public relations person for any politician during a scandal. I have never read anyone spinning facts as much as you do..
People sign up to this site for sex.
If you are not looking for sex . You don't belong here. If you're not meeting , hide your profile and go do something constructive. Way too many profiles saying not meeting at the moment. Add your fab friends on Facebook and leave the rest of us on fab to meet and have sex.
Now to my original point. Just because I may buy a piece of fish at the supermarket. Doesn't mean the super market is now a fish market
Don't turn fab into a fish market"
You do talk a lot of nonsense sometimes.
If you aren't looking for sex you don't belong here?
Nooo, you aren't telling anyone how to use the site at all.
I've told you before, you are not the ultimate authority on what swinging is.
And even if everyone was here for sex, it still doesn't mean certain types of behaviour should be expected or accepted.
It doesn't mean that everyone should be forced to love cock pics.
It doesn't mean that anyone should be able to get a meet without a profile and with only a cock pic and a fancy a fuck message.
It doesn't mean anyone is guaranteed sex or is owed anything by anyone.
It doesn't mean crude messages without so much as a hello are to be expected and accepted.
Justifying behaviours such as those are the only reason anyone ever says this is a sex site.
Everyone else, the ones not acting like entitled or crass arses, the ones with decent pics and profile, are busy meeting people and having fun.
Only the people not getting sex go on about this being a sex site. It's shorthand for this is a sex site so I should be getting sex, regardless of my behaviour.
PS by your analogy this site IS a fish market since anyone not looking for fish doesn't belong here. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I forgot, it's also shorthand for it's a sex site so why doesn't everyone want to see my cock?"
I'm sure a hello message or fancy a fuck is sent with the cock pic.. It's not just a cock pic.. Give the guys some credit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm here to have sex, most definitely. With people I find attractive. However to me attractiveness is about more than having a nice body or a big cock, it's about personality and who that person is.
If I met someone for sex in real life, we would chat and flirt before getting our clothes off. If the person was rude, vulgar or offensive it certainly wouldn't go any further, because that would be a turn off.
I agree with other posts, 'it's a sex site' is often cited as a defence when people use poor manners or lack any discernable social skills, neither of which make me horny. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I'm here to have sex, most definitely. With people I find attractive. However to me attractiveness is about more than having a nice body or a big cock, it's about personality and who that person is.
If I met someone for sex in real life, we would chat and flirt before getting our clothes off. If the person was rude, vulgar or offensive it certainly wouldn't go any further, because that would be a turn off.
I agree with other posts, 'it's a sex site' is often cited as a defence when people use poor manners or lack any discernable social skills, neither of which make me horny."
What you might find rude other women may not.
Just saying
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"I forgot, it's also shorthand for it's a sex site so why doesn't everyone want to see my cock?
I'm sure a hello message or fancy a fuck is sent with the cock pic.. It's not just a cock pic.. Give the guys some credit "
It's not just with messages though.
It's hardly unheard of to see posts on the fora saying some version of, "why do women say they don't want to see the 47 photos of my cock on my profile? It's a sex site ffs. They should expect to see cocks".
Why do some people automatically assume that they have to look for sex with their genitals out, (and particularly with 47 photos taken from minutely different angles)?
At least part of the aim of this site is to facilitate meeting people to have sex with.
Socials are to facilitate meeting people, often with the goal of finding people to have sex with. I've yet to see anyone turn up to a social and get their cock or fanny out.
If I go on a date hoping to have sex later on, I don't go with my fanny out. I don't get it out and wave it in his face until we get to the about to have sex stage.
A guy talking to me in a bar might be hoping to have sex with me. I wouldn't expect him to flop his tackle out as he walks up to me or as he talks to me.
Even if people are looking for sex, it is not, and should not be, considered a given that they want to see cocks (or fannies) being waved everywhere. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"I'm here to have sex, most definitely. With people I find attractive. However to me attractiveness is about more than having a nice body or a big cock, it's about personality and who that person is.
If I met someone for sex in real life, we would chat and flirt before getting our clothes off. If the person was rude, vulgar or offensive it certainly wouldn't go any further, because that would be a turn off.
I agree with other posts, 'it's a sex site' is often cited as a defence when people use poor manners or lack any discernable social skills, neither of which make me horny.
What you might find rude other women may not.
Just saying
"
True, but when they say they do, "FFS this is a sex site, you should expect it", isn't a good response. Regardless of this, it is heard (read?) fairly regularly here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm here to have sex, most definitely. With people I find attractive. However to me attractiveness is about more than having a nice body or a big cock, it's about personality and who that person is.
If I met someone for sex in real life, we would chat and flirt before getting our clothes off. If the person was rude, vulgar or offensive it certainly wouldn't go any further, because that would be a turn off.
I agree with other posts, 'it's a sex site' is often cited as a defence when people use poor manners or lack any discernable social skills, neither of which make me horny.
What you might find rude other women may not.
Just saying
"
Completely agree. We are all inherently different and it's respecting those differences that matters. Guys often vary in their approach too. I'm aware a lot of men don't like seeing vag shots etc.
You seem to expect everyone to use the site as you do. Even if people are only here for chat or cam sex, plenty of others will be looking for the same and that's ok. However you use the site, it's about seeking out those people who are on the same wavelength as you.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's a sexualised website with people showing photos of themselves naked,in lingerie/underwear,having sex and sometimes headless in clothing. This is to attract others to want to have sex with them. Only,some do it for the attention and want someone to talk to. If I were here as a couple I wouldn't be here to make friends or socialise,except to get to know if we're compatible sexually. I have friends I go out socialising with already. I don't mind cock pics but I don't find them arousing unless I'm going to meet the cock in person. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"I'm here to have sex, most definitely. With people I find attractive. However to me attractiveness is about more than having a nice body or a big cock, it's about personality and who that person is.
If I met someone for sex in real life, we would chat and flirt before getting our clothes off. If the person was rude, vulgar or offensive it certainly wouldn't go any further, because that would be a turn off.
I agree with other posts, 'it's a sex site' is often cited as a defence when people use poor manners or lack any discernable social skills, neither of which make me horny.
What you might find rude other women may not.
Just saying
Completely agree. We are all inherently different and it's respecting those differences that matters. Guys often vary in their approach too. I'm aware a lot of men don't like seeing vag shots etc.
You seem to expect everyone to use the site as you do. Even if people are only here for chat or cam sex, plenty of others will be looking for the same and that's ok. However you use the site, it's about seeking out those people who are on the same wavelength as you.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The way we see it there are two sides to the site. The meets we get aren't from the fora, so for us they aren't about swinging/sex. We see them more as a circus full of some strange people.
As for cock shots or whatever. Who cares what photos there are as long as they are legal? If a guy wants to show his cock off that's his look out. It's his advertising and if his advertising doesn't work it's for him to work out.
And just for balance, a woman with her legs spread and minky looking like a yawning donkey isn't great. Especially if said donkey is foaming from the mouth. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm here to have sex, most definitely. With people I find attractive. However to me attractiveness is about more than having a nice body or a big cock, it's about personality and who that person is.
If I met someone for sex in real life, we would chat and flirt before getting our clothes off. If the person was rude, vulgar or offensive it certainly wouldn't go any further, because that would be a turn off.
I agree with other posts, 'it's a sex site' is often cited as a defence when people use poor manners or lack any discernable social skills, neither of which make me horny.
What you might find rude other women may not.
Just saying
"
That's true, not all women are the same. But do you find there are enough women/couples on Fab who appreciate this approach that others may find rude? If so, fair play to you |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"The way we see it there are two sides to the site. The meets we get aren't from the fora, so for us they aren't about swinging/sex. We see them more as a circus full of some strange people.
As for cock shots or whatever. Who cares what photos there are as long as they are legal? If a guy wants to show his cock off that's his look out. It's his advertising and if his advertising doesn't work it's for him to work out.
And just for balance, a woman with her legs spread and minky looking like a yawning donkey isn't great. Especially if said donkey is foaming from the mouth."
Thank you. Can you believe you would see a picture of a penis and vaginia on a sex site?
Grow up , nudity isn't vulgar |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"The way we see it there are two sides to the site. The meets we get aren't from the fora, so for us they aren't about swinging/sex. We see them more as a circus full of some strange people.
As for cock shots or whatever. Who cares what photos there are as long as they are legal? If a guy wants to show his cock off that's his look out. It's his advertising and if his advertising doesn't work it's for him to work out.
And just for balance, a woman with her legs spread and minky looking like a yawning donkey isn't great. Especially if said donkey is foaming from the mouth.
Thank you. Can you believe you would see a picture of a penis and vaginia on a sex site?
Grow up , nudity isn't vulgar"
Nobody said it is.
What is vulgar is waving your genitals, (or numerous photos thereof), in someone's face by way of a greeting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Spot on ..... Swinging has evolved . When I started 8 years ago. People actually logged on websites when they were looking for sex. I could go out to a vanilla event and If I didn't meet anyone . I could log on and find someone ready to meet. The best meets I've had were after 12AM.
Now most people want to talk for weeks , meet for coffee , meet for lunch , and travel hundreds of miles for sex.
I'm not looking for a free sex worker.I'm not looking to go to a organized social. I'm not looking to travel 100's of miles and book a hotel. I'm not looking to meet you for lunch or coffee.
I'm looking for someone who is near by that wants to have sex , and if it's great we can become fwb. This can be accomplished by a quick phone chat and a meeting for a drink with a chance to play after.
"
But if it's changed, and you can no longer get sex on tap at short notice, unfortunately there's not much you can do. You either go without more often, or you compromise.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Listen guys....lighten up here.
The OPs obvious success (as seen from his numerous verifications?) show that the approach clearly works for him [?????]...so fair play! |
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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago
Wakefield |
"
Please read my opening statement again. I'm not criticizing how you use the site. I'm asking if you signed up to this site for sex as a priority. "
Yes for us sex is the priority.
We have a busy life and though we do socialise away from Fab we are here mainly for no strings sex |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Only the people not getting sex go on about this being a sex site. It's shorthand for this is a sex site so I should be getting sex, regardless of my behaviour."
I suspect this is the case. I have noticed that the men who protest that 'this is a sex site', and the men with a more crass approach to getting sex, are often the ones who aren't verified, or haven't been verified in years. But they shouldn't blame the site or the people, because there are men who are out having fun on a regular basis, who have no complaints about this site not bring used appropriately. If someone is not getting the quantity or quality or type of sex they want, they should take a look at themselves. And if someone is getting what they want from this site, then of course they have nothing to complain about. I'm getting the sex I want, so this site is serving me very nicely |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Listen guys....lighten up here.
The OPs obvious success (as seen from his numerous verifications?) show that the approach clearly works for him [?????]...so fair play!"
Lol |
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By *manda63Woman
over a year ago
Southampton |
I joined expecting to get nothing and was surprised I got any attention at all on my single profile. On this profile, we haven't met anyone as yet just having sex with each other when we can meet up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Couple of years back I had one won and stayed over at mine on the Friday night. Another turned up on the Saturday while the first was still here....they had met before but we're not "friends"...though they are now. While they were here I got a booty call from another of my friends....I went to see her for a couple of hours, came back and the other two were getting on like a house on fire. The three of us had a bit of fun. First woman went home, second one stayed over Saturday night. On Sunday we went for a pub lunch and met up with the third lady for drinks......to me THAT is a good example of what swinging is about and the way you can use this site to suit yourself."
And to me you can't get better than that! Fucking you friends, sharing, no jealousy, no possessiveness. Love it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
i signed up for NSA sex. Found that's more complicated in its self 
Like life, I'm now on the forums. And if anything happens it will happen. butbi read profiles and find the people here are all looking for something completely different from the next. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Listen guys....lighten up here.
The OPs obvious success (as seen from his numerous verifications?) show that the approach clearly works for him [?????]...so fair play!"
I don't except Verifactions... All my meetings are clandestine |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Spot on ..... Swinging has evolved . When I started 8 years ago. People actually logged on websites when they were looking for sex. I could go out to a vanilla event and If I didn't meet anyone . I could log on and find someone ready to meet. The best meets I've had were after 12AM.
Now most people want to talk for weeks , meet for coffee , meet for lunch , and travel hundreds of miles for sex.
I'm not looking for a free sex worker.I'm not looking to go to a organized social. I'm not looking to travel 100's of miles and book a hotel. I'm not looking to meet you for lunch or coffee.
I'm looking for someone who is near by that wants to have sex , and if it's great we can become fwb. This can be accomplished by a quick phone chat and a meeting for a drink with a chance to play after.
But if it's changed, and you can no longer get sex on tap at short notice, unfortunately there's not much you can do. You either go without more often, or you compromise.
"
Well I can still get sex on tap from this site. The only difference is I have to pay to go to a gangbang or sex party
That really is the biggest change, I've noticed.. More people looking to make a dollar than have fun |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Its a sex site simple as that
Their is some people that are so far up their own ass. They think its offensive to see cock and pussy pics
LOL
No, they just don't find this is how a gentleman should introduce himself to anyone.
Not here to find a wife luv
I'm here to fuk and its as simple as that
"
And if you are getting the sex you want by using this approach then good on you
However I find it a bit unfair that you regard women who don't like cock pics as 'so far up their own ass'. I personally find close up genital pictures a turn off. But I can't help feeling this way. It certainly doesn't make me 'up my ass' just because I don't like something. We're using this site appropriately - going to sex parties, having meets etc. We're certainly not short of plenty of NSA sex, so we cannot be criticised for the way we use this site. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Listen guys....lighten up here.
The OPs obvious success (as seen from his numerous verifications?) show that the approach clearly works for him [?????]...so fair play!
I don't except Verifactions... All my meetings are clandestine "
Seriously? You actually request that people don't write you a verification? I mean I know some people are not in favour of the verification system, but you actually say in you profile that you prefer people to prove themselves with verifications. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Spot on ..... Swinging has evolved . When I started 8 years ago. People actually logged on websites when they were looking for sex. I could go out to a vanilla event and If I didn't meet anyone . I could log on and find someone ready to meet. The best meets I've had were after 12AM.
Now most people want to talk for weeks , meet for coffee , meet for lunch , and travel hundreds of miles for sex.
I'm not looking for a free sex worker.I'm not looking to go to a organized social. I'm not looking to travel 100's of miles and book a hotel. I'm not looking to meet you for lunch or coffee.
I'm looking for someone who is near by that wants to have sex , and if it's great we can become fwb. This can be accomplished by a quick phone chat and a meeting for a drink with a chance to play after.
But if it's changed, and you can no longer get sex on tap at short notice, unfortunately there's not much you can do. You either go without more often, or you compromise.
Well I can still get sex on tap from this site. The only difference is I have to pay to go to a gangbang or sex party
That really is the biggest change, I've noticed.. More people looking to make a dollar than have fun "
Perhaps that's down to your approach. If you deter the people who'd meet you without charging, it's not surprising you'd need to go with the options that require payment.
Neither I, nor my friends on here charge our meets. |
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"I joined for the n.s.a sex and found clubs and parties advertising on here,which I have found it easier to find what and who I want
Alot easier than going through the mission of finding someone from here,I just go to a club and chat for real and have sex
Not that I do that much now I've turned into one of those party organisers,organising parties for others to socialize and have sex,I'm nice like that "
Snap
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I joined as I wanted to explore my sexuality more and try new things... it's still that but I've made good friends with likeminded people on top of that. For me, it's not just a sex site. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The people who use this site have many reasons for doing so, every one of them is right
I mainly use this site for the forum, I enjoy some of the debates. I don't message many people, I don't go looking for sexy pics, I don't get turned on by cock pics or sex chat, stories etc.
We are swingers but we attend clubs and parties. We have our contacts outside of fab for that. Occasionally we will have contact from someone new through this site but it's not necessary.
I don't respond well to the assumption that just because I'm a swinger that I'm highly sexed, enjoy sex with lots of men, am into every kind of perversion, enjoy filthy chat, will have explicit pics for friends only, will enjoy any explicit pic and will want to see cock pics. All of these assumptions are incorrect because I simply am not interested in any of that.
I enjoy the taboo nature of swinging, I enjoy the ambience of the club's and parties. I enjoy going out just in underwear and being admired. I enjoy seeing some crazy and bizarre things and meeting adventurous and unique people. I have experienced and enjoyed some wild sex sessions but sex is not the pull for me.
I have every right to be on this site regardless of my sexual preferences and I will continue to do so.
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