FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Farting during meets....
Farting during meets....
Jump to: Newest in thread
| |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?" excuse yourself to the loo and do it in privacy xxx | |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?excuse yourself to the loo and do it in privacy xxx" Hmmm some toilets seem to work like an amplifier!  | |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?excuse yourself to the loo and do it in privacy xxx Hmmm some toilets seem to work like an amplifier! "They sure do 
Even with the telly on I discovered the morning after, pumped full of air by the fun enjoyed, fart turned epic by the amplification of a premier inn loo and bathroom acoustics. | |||
Doll x | |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?" Just look the other person in the eye and do what you gotta do...mid conversation without even a pause. If they even react slightly then they are no gentleman/lady and are not worth a second meeting. | |||
| |||
| |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action? Just look the other person in the eye and do what you gotta do...mid conversation without even a pause. If they even react slightly then they are no gentleman/lady and are not worth a second meeting."  | |||
| |||
"Tell them ur away to the shop for another btl of wine.... Least that way the smell won't linger lol x" I was thinking more the 4 AM duvet lifter.. | |||
"Tell them ur away to the shop for another btl of wine.... Least that way the smell won't linger lol x I was thinking more the 4 AM duvet lifter.. "Can't beat the old Dutch Oven. The last and greatest test of courtship. | |||
"Get them to pull your finger?" | |||
| |||
| |||
 | |||
| |||
 | |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?excuse yourself to the loo and do it in privacy xxx Hmmm some toilets seem to work like an amplifier!
They sure do
Even with the telly on I discovered the morning after, pumped full of air by the fun enjoyed, fart turned epic by the amplification of a premier inn loo and bathroom acoustics. "Ha ha ha ha ha ha oh so funny | |||
| |||
"Get them to pull your finger?" | |||
"Go to the bathroom fart into a folded towel. "Depends who's bathroon and who's towel?  | |||
 | |||
| |||
| |||
 | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"Go to the bathroom fart into a folded towel. "Erm... not that is ever happens to me, I'm asking for a friend... but what happens if you follow through onto the towel? | |||
| |||
 | |||
| |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?" Wait til she's giving you a bj, they LOVE it | |||
| |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?excuse yourself to the loo and do it in privacy xxx Hmmm some toilets seem to work like an amplifier!
They sure do
Even with the telly on I discovered the morning after, pumped full of air by the fun enjoyed, fart turned epic by the amplification of a premier inn loo and bathroom acoustics. "Pmsl I've had this too...well if they want bum fun they have to accept the inevitable bathroom bubbles and ensuing giggling from me!! Hahahahahaha. | |||
| |||
"My farts don't smell so,as long as I can ease it out with no sound,they are none the wiser. Or meet someone with a fart fetish and don't hold back "Noooo the silent but deadly are the worst ones | |||
 | |||
"I can't see letting a little one slip being a major thing, it's when they are lumpy there can be problems "Pmsl lumpy farts. .I'm dying here! | |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?" Whenever I'm having a sleepover with a guy that's when I'm guaranteed to wanna fart my arse off or have a dump. If my farts don't make me implode and they go up inside my stomach making a weird noise I've gone to extreme measures such as going to the toilet and putting my finger over my arse hole to let it out quiet and it just comes out like a quiet puff, wash my finger and bum hole and back into bed, I've even excused myself to get something from my car and gone to my car to fart. For a shit I could only do that by asking to have a shower or bath then I'd have one whilst the bath or shower was running then I'd get clean. Or if I've had a guy at my house I've gone next door to my mothers house and had one. | |||
"I can't BELIEVE you lot are even discussing it!!! Ladies only ever powder their noses! End of! "Trust me I've smelt em. That ain't no powder | |||
"I WAS ..... I emphasise WAS.... feeling horny until you disgusting lot ruined it! You are all off my Christmas card list!! "Meh, s'ok, your last one was crap anyway! | |||
| |||
| |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action? Whenever I'm having a sleepover with a guy that's when I'm guaranteed to wanna fart my arse off or have a dump. If my farts don't make me implode and they go up inside my stomach making a weird noise I've gone to extreme measures such as going to the toilet and putting my finger over my arse hole to let it out quiet and it just comes out like a quiet puff, wash my finger and bum hole and back into bed, I've even excused myself to get something from my car and gone to my car to fart. For a shit I could only do that by asking to have a shower or bath then I'd have one whilst the bath or shower was running then I'd get clean. Or if I've had a guy at my house I've gone next door to my mothers house and had one. " Good God you dirty fecker | |||
| |||
| |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action? Whenever I'm having a sleepover with a guy that's when I'm guaranteed to wanna fart my arse off or have a dump. If my farts don't make me implode and they go up inside my stomach making a weird noise I've gone to extreme measures such as going to the toilet and putting my finger over my arse hole to let it out quiet and it just comes out like a quiet puff, wash my finger and bum hole and back into bed, I've even excused myself to get something from my car and gone to my car to fart. For a shit I could only do that by asking to have a shower or bath then I'd have one whilst the bath or shower was running then I'd get clean. Or if I've had a guy at my house I've gone next door to my mothers house and had one. " Too much information! !!!!!!!!! | |||
"I have a relative who hasn't farted in front of her husband yet!!! You gotta laugh about these things...we all do it! Well done clem.... great thread..made my day.lol." Been with the wife fifteen years and heard her fart 8 times. And 3 of those were in one go. | |||
| |||
| |||
"I have a relative who hasn't farted in front of her husband yet!!! You gotta laugh about these things...we all do it! Well done clem.... great thread..made my day.lol." I don't do it!!!!!!!! Yuck!!!!! No no no so wrong! You people aren't well!!!!!  | |||
| |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe. "Toshn! !!!! I expected higher standards from you!!!!!!! OMG! The fact you all SAY the words!!!!! | |||
| |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe.
Toshn! !!!! I expected higher standards from you!!!!!!! OMG! The fact you all SAY the words!!!!! "was looking at it from a scientific point of view. It's only when the air passes over the shit loitering in yer fart pipe that makes it smell. No shit= no smell. Just saying | |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?" Let it go! | |||
| |||
| |||
"Funny Once I was with an absolute God , everything you would want in a man , we had the most amazing sex , he laid back I laid with my head on his thigh , he coughed and farted right on my face ! I didn't really know what to do lol so I just ignored it Lmao " And held your breath???? Pmsl | |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe.
Toshn! !!!! I expected higher standards from you!!!!!!! OMG! The fact you all SAY the words!!!!! was looking at it from a scientific point of view. It's only when the air passes over the shit loitering in yer fart pipe that makes it smell. No shit= no smell. Just saying "I cant discuss it! Just GROSS!!!!!! | |||
"Funny Once I was with an absolute God , everything you would want in a man , we had the most amazing sex , he laid back I laid with my head on his thigh , he coughed and farted right on my face ! I didn't really know what to do lol so I just ignored it Lmao And held your breath???? Pmsl" Yes ha ha ha ha | |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe.
Toshn! !!!! I expected higher standards from you!!!!!!! OMG! The fact you all SAY the words!!!!! was looking at it from a scientific point of view. It's only when the air passes over the shit loitering in yer fart pipe that makes it smell. No shit= no smell. Just saying
I cant discuss it! Just GROSS!!!!!!"it's good to talk about these things. Get it out in the open. ( if you pardon the pun ) | |||
"Funny Once I was with an absolute God , everything you would want in a man , we had the most amazing sex , he laid back I laid with my head on his thigh , he coughed and farted right on my face ! I didn't really know what to do lol so I just ignored it Lmao " I gave the hubby the wind swept look while he was giving me a short back and side's down below, I was so embarrassed but can't help but laugh at his face he pulled | |||
| |||
"I was gonna go for the folded towel trick. I'd actually die if I had to fart in someone's presence " Please note folded towels are for hotel meets. Just make sure you choose the right towel when it's time to shower | |||
| |||
| |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe.
Toshn! !!!! I expected higher standards from you!!!!!!! OMG! The fact you all SAY the words!!!!! was looking at it from a scientific point of view. It's only when the air passes over the shit loitering in yer fart pipe that makes it smell. No shit= no smell. Just saying
I cant discuss it! Just GROSS!!!!!! it's good to talk about these things. Get it out in the open. ( if you pardon the pun ) "Nooooooooooo I won't talk about such things. They don't exist!!!! | |||
| |||
"Funny Once I was with an absolute God , everything you would want in a man , we had the most amazing sex , he laid back I laid with my head on his thigh , he coughed and farted right on my face ! I didn't really know what to do lol so I just ignored it Lmao I gave the hubby the wind swept look while he was giving me a short back and side's down below, I was so embarrassed but can't help but laugh at his face he pulled "Had guy laugh because i did
Which only made it worse as it made me laugh even more
Im very sorry | |||
| |||
| |||
"I've never farted in front of a meet but during sex I sometimes have a bit of air trapped and changing positions can often lead to a bit of a love puff!!! It's so embarrassing but I can't help but giggle!!" I did that, in a 69 position, I was on top, did several fanny carts, was so embarrassed I giggled, had a mouthful of cock at the time. X | |||
"I've never farted in front of a meet but during sex I sometimes have a bit of air trapped and changing positions can often lead to a bit of a love puff!!! It's so embarrassing but I can't help but giggle!! I did that, in a 69 position, I was on top, did several fanny carts, was so embarrassed I giggled, had a mouthful of cock at the time. X" Farts not carts ! Lol xxx | |||
"I was gonna go for the folded towel trick. I'd actually die if I had to fart in someone's presence Please note folded towels are for hotel meets. Just make sure you choose the right towel when it's time to shower "Could you please clarify if the folded towels are for farting in or shitting in? XXX | |||
"I was gonna go for the folded towel trick. I'd actually die if I had to fart in someone's presence Please note folded towels are for hotel meets. Just make sure you choose the right towel when it's time to shower
Could you please clarify if the folded towels are for farting in or shitting in?
XXX"OMG you lot are just low!!!!  | |||
"I've never farted in front of a meet but during sex I sometimes have a bit of air trapped and changing positions can often lead to a bit of a love puff!!! It's so embarrassing but I can't help but giggle!! I did that, in a 69 position, I was on top, did several fanny carts, was so embarrassed I giggled, had a mouthful of cock at the time. X Farts not carts ! Lol xxx" Haha!! That's hilarious! X | |||
 | |||
| |||
 | |||
| |||
| |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe. "Woah. Hang on. Is it a fart pipe or a poop chute? | |||
| |||
"I was gonna go for the folded towel trick. I'd actually die if I had to fart in someone's presence Please note folded towels are for hotel meets. Just make sure you choose the right towel when it's time to shower
Could you please clarify if the folded towels are for farting in or shitting in?
XXX"Why would you even shit in a towel??? It is used to muffle the sounds of morning farts. ALL HAIL MORNING FARTS!!these are the farts of all farts loud rambunctious farts that say to the world. I am awake i am alive!!! | |||
"I was gonna go for the folded towel trick. I'd actually die if I had to fart in someone's presence Please note folded towels are for hotel meets. Just make sure you choose the right towel when it's time to shower
Could you please clarify if the folded towels are for farting in or shitting in?
XXX
Why would you even shit in a towel??? It is used to muffle the sounds of morning farts. ALL HAIL MORNING FARTS!!these are the farts of all farts loud rambunctious farts that say to the world. I am awake i am alive!!!"Aka The dawn chorus if you've ever lived in barracks or on a mess deck | |||
| |||
| |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe.
Toshn! !!!! I expected higher standards from you!!!!!!! OMG! The fact you all SAY the words!!!!! was looking at it from a scientific point of view. It's only when the air passes over the shit loitering in yer fart pipe that makes it smell. No shit= no smell. Just saying "cool so after using a douche which can make you prone to parping... then it wont smell as you've cleaned the funnel out?...... bonus | |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe.
Toshn! !!!! I expected higher standards from you!!!!!!! OMG! The fact you all SAY the words!!!!! was looking at it from a scientific point of view. It's only when the air passes over the shit loitering in yer fart pipe that makes it smell. No shit= no smell. Just saying
cool so after using a douche which can make you prone to parping... then it wont smell as you've cleaned the funnel out?...... bonus "exactly. Fresh air | |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe.
Toshn! !!!! I expected higher standards from you!!!!!!! OMG! The fact you all SAY the words!!!!! was looking at it from a scientific point of view. It's only when the air passes over the shit loitering in yer fart pipe that makes it smell. No shit= no smell. Just saying
cool so after using a douche which can make you prone to parping... then it wont smell as you've cleaned the funnel out?...... bonus exactly. Fresh air "Your grasp of the nuances of human biology never ceases to amaze me! | |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe.
Toshn! !!!! I expected higher standards from you!!!!!!! OMG! The fact you all SAY the words!!!!! was looking at it from a scientific point of view. It's only when the air passes over the shit loitering in yer fart pipe that makes it smell. No shit= no smell. Just saying
cool so after using a douche which can make you prone to parping... then it wont smell as you've cleaned the funnel out?...... bonus exactly. Fresh air
Your lack of a grasp of the nuances of human biology never ceases to amaze me! "FTFY | |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?excuse yourself to the loo and do it in privacy xxx Hmmm some toilets seem to work like an amplifier!
They sure do
Even with the telly on I discovered the morning after, pumped full of air by the fun enjoyed, fart turned epic by the amplification of a premier inn loo and bathroom acoustics.
Pmsl I've had this too...well if they want bum fun they have to accept the inevitable bathroom bubbles and ensuing giggling from me!! Hahahahahaha. "I was mortified. all I could do was just head back into the room and try to be vaugely dignified. He didn't try to rove it back up me. Can't think why not | |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe.
Toshn! !!!! I expected higher standards from you!!!!!!! OMG! The fact you all SAY the words!!!!! was looking at it from a scientific point of view. It's only when the air passes over the shit loitering in yer fart pipe that makes it smell. No shit= no smell. Just saying
cool so after using a douche which can make you prone to parping... then it wont smell as you've cleaned the funnel out?...... bonus exactly. Fresh air " i smell bullshit! | |||
| |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe. "Mine never smell. I Googled it and it said they smell when you eat food which produces sulphur. I obviously don't. | |||
"They don't smell if there is no shit in yer fart pipe.
Mine never smell. I Googled it and it said they smell when you eat food which produces sulphur. I obviously don't. "Are you that woman that went to the docs, cos you kept farting only they never smelt and they didn't make any sound.... He gave you some pills and you went back next week, saying that you're still farting, they still don't smell, but now they make a noise...you said "see? I just did one then!" He said well that's cleared your hearing up, let's see what we can do about your sense of smell... | |||
| |||
| |||
"Funny Once I was with an absolute God , everything you would want in a man , we had the most amazing sex , he laid back I laid with my head on his thigh , he coughed and farted right on my face ! I didn't really know what to do lol so I just ignored it Lmao " Brilliant | |||
| |||
"Get them to pull your finger?" Lmao | |||
| |||
xxx | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"Especially if you was farting into the said folded towel"" Made me laugh very loudly | |||
"I can't BELIEVE you lot are even discussing it!!! Ladies only ever powder their noses! End of! Trust me I've smelt em. That ain't no powder "Giggling helplessly here | |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?excuse yourself to the loo and do it in privacy xxx Hmmm some toilets seem to work like an amplifier! "I nearly died reading this | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?" Just let it rip....and pull the duvet over their head.....is there any other way? | |||
"lmfao am crying here we all at times suffer a whole gamete of fart issues I cough fart sneeze fart laugh fart cuddle fart and panic fart most are just parps n squeaks but I have dropped a knicker ripper n dead trex or 2 in me time I just roar with laughter and "more tea vicar" "speak up brown your through" n "ohhh catch that mouse" are me farty catch phrases LMFAO "You missed out "name that tune in one!" (The answer being....Blowin' in the Wind! | |||
| |||
"I like to do silent but deadly ones on polite company, as the stench rises i proclaim loudly "mmmmm! Can anyone else smell doughnuts?!" No one can resist a good inhale through the nose at such an invitation......" funny that is sooo funny gonna haemorrhage to truly test one !! | |||
| |||
"Had to post as didn't want this thread to end " thank you id have missed this x lmao | |||
"Had to post as didn't want this thread to end thank you id have missed this x lmao "Happy to help lmao | |||
"I like to do silent but deadly ones on polite company, as the stench rises i proclaim loudly "mmmmm! Can anyone else smell doughnuts?!" No one can resist a good inhale through the nose at such an invitation......" I can vouch that he actually does do this....sometimes i just cringe | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action? Just let it rip....and pull the duvet over their head.....is there any other way?" Yes head under duvet until they've had a good nose full, and if you can do another while they are trapped there, all the better. XXX | |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action? Just let it rip....and pull the duvet over their head.....is there any other way? Yes head under duvet until they've had a good nose full, and if you can do another while they are trapped there, all the better. XXX" An! The classic Dutch Oven | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"So you've managed to snag yourself an over nighter, you gotta fart at some point, or go home in wind induced agony! What's your course of action?" Pop to the loo!
I had a Fabber Dutch oven me before. Fucker!! | |||
| |||
"I can't BELIEVE you lot are even discussing it!!! Ladies only ever powder their noses! End of! "I'm clearly not a lady then! I fart long and loud when I wake up every morning, and I snore like a train! This COULD be why guys rarely hanker for repeat overnight meets! | |||
"Get them to pull your finger?" Hahaha that sounds like what I'd do | |||
hahaha | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"Get them to pull your finger?" This has been used. | |||
"Get them to pull your finger? This has been used. " In the tiniest tent that the world has ever known .
Horrid boy.
Or so a little bird once told me. | |||
| |||
"Get them to pull your finger?" | |||
"lmfao am crying here we all at times suffer a whole gamete of fart issues I cough fart sneeze fart laugh fart cuddle fart and panic fart most are just parps n squeaks but I have dropped a knicker ripper n dead trex or 2 in me time I just roar with laughter and "more tea vicar" "speak up brown your through" n "ohhh catch that mouse" are me farty catch phrases LMFAO "Brilliant, property chuckling x | |||
| |||
| |||
"Go to the bathroom fart into a folded towel. "Thinks the folded towel may blow away | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"We liked the guy who said quite openly I'm sorry but excuse me for a moment as I've got to fart really badly, left the room did his thing and we carried on until the wife had to do the same, by his openness the whole meet came to be a lot more relaxed and better for it." Ah,the winds of change are blowing. .. | |||
| |||
 | |||
"got a big one coming...here it comes, oh, you BEAUTY...!!!. Ok love, get yer head back down there, and I'll warn you again when another one is due. I can feel it brewing already, but just go suck for now. I bet you're glad you've got that cold now...it won't smell so bad under the duvet..." LOL. NOT...!!! | |||
"I just farted,and it still doesn't smell even though I had curry last night. What is wrong with me? "Lady farts don't smell.  | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"Go to the bathroom fart into a folded towel. "OMG someone could wipe their hands or face on that... Get abwad of loo roll, press it to your bum hole and ease the fart out gently... Ps go to the bathroom first lol Lmn | |||
"Get them to pull your finger? This has been used. In the tiniest tent that the world has ever known .
Horrid boy.
Or so a little bird once told me. "You couldn't resist temptation | |||
"Go to the bathroom fart into a folded towel.
OMG someone could wipe their hands or face on that...
Get abwad of loo roll, press it to your bum hole and ease the fart out gently...
Ps go to the bathroom first lol
Lmn"You've don't this haven't you? Someone could blow their nose with that loo roll. Hopefully doesn't get a cling on dangling from their nostril like in The inbetweeners | |||
| |||
