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Is it wrong to try to have sex on a coffee social?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I usually meet someone for a drink and if we get along we move on to my place or a hotel.

Now this has alcohol involved so people can let their gaurd down and live for the moment.

Now with a coffee meet its just caffeine and we are usually dressed in our work clothes. So it's not ideal for hooking up.

How do I broach having sex over a latte?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

umm well if you want it i suppose just ask !! not best advise but get to point and at least you know , do you think it be a yes ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"umm well if you want it i suppose just ask !! not best advise but get to point and at least you know , do you think it be a yes ?"

Well I guess I could suggest going to the bathroom with me....

Starbucks does have clean bathrooms

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"umm well if you want it i suppose just ask !! not best advise but get to point and at least you know , do you think it be a yes ?"

what i mean is ye cold be drinking lattes and say nothing but ye could both be thing it

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"umm well if you want it i suppose just ask !! not best advise but get to point and at least you know , do you think it be a yes ?

what i mean is ye cold be drinking lattes and say nothing but ye could both be thing it"

I got you... I was just thinking it would be crass talking sexual in a Starbucks...

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By *hell and jWoman  over a year ago

Worksop

Nothing wrong with that if I like the meet and feel horn I go for it xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Nothing wrong with that if I like the meet and feel horn I go for it xx"

I like your style... I always thought coffee meets were just for a quick hello and no sex involved.

I guess I'll take a shower first , shave , and wear fresh underwear

I might get lucky

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"umm well if you want it i suppose just ask !! not best advise but get to point and at least you know , do you think it be a yes ?

Well I guess I could suggest going to the bathroom with me....

Starbucks does have clean bathrooms "

well youll never now if you dont ask

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Nothing wrong with that if I like the meet and feel horn I go for it xx

I like your style... I always thought coffee meets were just for a quick hello and no sex involved.

I guess I'll take a shower first , shave , and wear fresh underwear

I might get lucky "

do you might

and worst can happen is they say no ..

nothing ventured nothing gained

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why not discuss the possibility when you are messaging before hand? I avoid socials so i don't know how others do them but i would like to know before meeting if there's a chance of sex.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Go prepared just in case. Be clean. Have what's needed on your person. But just expect a coffee.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why not discuss the possibility when you are messaging before hand? I avoid socials so i don't know how others do them but i would like to know before meeting if there's a chance of sex."

This. Social is social to me. Don't blur the lines on the day without at least exploring the convo beforehand.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

To me a coffee meet is a coffee meet, don't tend to do them much now, prefer to get straight down to business. XXX

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By *he horny kinkstersCouple  over a year ago

North West

Nothing better than a social with a chance of more if both sides are up for it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I usually meet someone for a drink and if we get along we move on to my place or a hotel.

Now this has alcohol involved so people can let their gaurd down and live for the moment.

"

Well that doesn't sound in the least bit rapey

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"umm well if you want it i suppose just ask !! not best advise but get to point and at least you know , do you think it be a yes ?"

I think it's good advice,better than getting someone intoxicated hoping they will,to quote the op "let their guard down",and thus take advantage of someone's vulnerability.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

well good luck anyway

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By *ikeC81Man  over a year ago

harrow


"To me a coffee meet is a coffee meet, don't tend to do them much now, prefer to get straight down to business. XXX"

Well for people that I haven't met before I like a little social to see how we get on, and is there any spark in person

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What a refreshing thread

Glad we aren't the only ones who aren't into a social with no option to play

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By *oddyWoman  over a year ago

between havant and chichester


"umm well if you want it i suppose just ask !! not best advise but get to point and at least you know , do you think it be a yes ?

what i mean is ye cold be drinking lattes and say nothing but ye could both be thing it

I got you... I was just thinking it would be crass talking sexual in a Starbucks..."

even worse in costas or neros

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ask the barista to write 'Fuck Me' in chocolate sprinkles on the top of her latte?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I usually meet someone for a drink and if we get along we move on to my place or a hotel.

Now this has alcohol involved so people can let their gaurd down and live for the moment.

Well that doesn't sound in the least bit rapey "

Nothing rapey here.... Drinks make you relaxed. Coffee makes you hyper...

Besides women don't usually stumble and have to be carried out of Starbucks after a coffee.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Go prepared just in case. Be clean. Have what's needed on your person. But just expect a coffee. "

This exactly.....to go to a "social" expecting sex is rather crass! Like guys in clubs who expect sex just because they paid to get in.

Like others have said, the possibility should be discussed as yes or no BEFOREHAND.

I've had a few "coffee" socials that have resulted in more....to be honest I tend to just go with the flow. A bit of flirty banter and more often than not the lady in question will make the first move.

In terms of being "clean" in preparation... I always am and I have condoms in my wallet 24/7 (from experience of just meeting people randomly) but it's not something I think about.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"umm well if you want it i suppose just ask !! not best advise but get to point and at least you know , do you think it be a yes ?

Well I guess I could suggest going to the bathroom with me....

Starbucks does have clean bathrooms "

Taking someone to the bathroom in Starbucks is crass flirty chat is ok or are Starbucks narrow minded .

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Ask the barista to write 'Fuck Me' in chocolate sprinkles on the top of her latte?

"

I might get slapped or arrested.

I'll stick with my tried and true method.

After she is almost done with her latte....

I'll lean over , throwing caution into the wind.

And whisper in her ear " Can I piss on you "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Ask the barista to write 'Fuck Me' in chocolate sprinkles on the top of her latte?

I might get slapped or arrested.

I'll stick with my tried and true method.

After she is almost done with her latte....

I'll lean over , throwing caution into the wind.

And whisper in her ear " Can I piss on you "

"

i like your style

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman  over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!


"I usually meet someone for a drink and if we get along we move on to my place or a hotel.

Now this has alcohol involved so people can let their gaurd down and live for the moment.

Well that doesn't sound in the least bit rapey

Nothing rapey here.... Drinks make you relaxed. Coffee makes you hyper...

Besides women don't usually stumble and have to be carried out of Starbucks after a coffee.

"

It didn't sound 'rapey' to me I understand what you're saying. Just ask her before you meet whether they like the idea of continuing after the coffee if all goes well,then you know if she's open to the idea.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Go prepared just in case. Be clean. Have what's needed on your person. But just expect a coffee.

This exactly.....to go to a "social" expecting sex is rather crass! Like guys in clubs who expect sex just because they paid to get in.

Like others have said, the possibility should be discussed as yes or no BEFOREHAND.

I've had a few "coffee" socials that have resulted in more....to be honest I tend to just go with the flow. A bit of flirty banter and more often than not the lady in question will make the first move.

In terms of being "clean" in preparation... I always am and I have condoms in my wallet 24/7 (from experience of just meeting people randomly) but it's not something I think about."

Clean is relative.... If I take a shower at 5-6am , I don't feel clean at 5 pm.

Also if I shave at 6am by 5 pm those damn grey hairs have come back

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Go prepared just in case. Be clean. Have what's needed on your person. But just expect a coffee.

This exactly.....to go to a "social" expecting sex is rather crass! Like guys in clubs who expect sex just because they paid to get in.

Like others have said, the possibility should be discussed as yes or no BEFOREHAND.

I've had a few "coffee" socials that have resulted in more....to be honest I tend to just go with the flow. A bit of flirty banter and more often than not the lady in question will make the first move.

In terms of being "clean" in preparation... I always am and I have condoms in my wallet 24/7 (from experience of just meeting people randomly) but it's not something I think about.

Clean is relative.... If I take a shower at 5-6am , I don't feel clean at 5 pm.

Also if I shave at 6am by 5 pm those damn grey hairs have come back "

Ask her back for a shower then

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Ask her back for a shower then "

.......oh! You already did

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple  over a year ago

Derbyshire


"Ask the barista to write 'Fuck Me' in chocolate sprinkles on the top of her latte?

I might get slapped or arrested.

"

Or worse yet, she might misunderstand and fuck the barista

Mr ddc

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

if you dont ask you dont get - in our early days we met up for a coffee at a service station - he was heading from one place to another and was a convenient place to stop - we made good use of the shower facilities

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I met a lady for a social but we agreed on a sign for if we wanted to take things further. Simply she would excuse herself go to the ladies, then when she returned would discreetly hand me her knickers.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Ask the barista to write 'Fuck Me' in chocolate sprinkles on the top of her latte?

I might get slapped or arrested.

Or worse yet, she might misunderstand and fuck the barista

Mr ddc

"

Haha.....this reminds me of a Perry waiter in a local Indian restaurant. Was with a lovely friend from here. Waiter kept brushing against her, peering down her cleavage etc. When it came to the sweet we only ordered one....a lemon cheesecake with orange sorbet.

The waiter assumed it was for her as she gave the order. It arrived with chocolate sauce dribbled on in the obvious shape of an erect cock!!

It was placed down in front of her.....she then obviously passed it to me and told the waiter....if it's only that big you have no chance.....! He stayed away then lol....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Broach the subject before the latte when you're messaging, that way no awkward moment when you make your move & she asks for the bill.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

*pervy

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By *verReadyAndMinxyCouple  over a year ago

Blackpool


"Ask the barista to write 'Fuck Me' in chocolate sprinkles on the top of her latte?

"

Haha love this!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

I met a lady for a social but we agreed on a sign for if we wanted to take things further. Simply she would excuse herself go to the ladies, then when she returned would discreetly hand me her knickers."

You sir are a genius....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm not sure that the beverage of choice alters the ability to suggest naughty shenanigans, unless you require people to be inebriated which is a WHOLE different thread and big old bag of issues.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Ask her back for a shower then .......oh! You already did "

Awww my shower might be dirty... I'll go and by some rubber sheets

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure that the beverage of choice alters the ability to suggest naughty shenanigans, unless you require people to be inebriated which is a WHOLE different thread and big old bag of issues. "

I get where the OP is coming from. On the whole i don't like coffee shops....full of people with kids etc etc.....a nice cosy bar though feels more conducive to getting flirty. Meeting in a coffee shop would be my nightmare meet.

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman  over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!


"

I met a lady for a social but we agreed on a sign for if we wanted to take things further. Simply she would excuse herself go to the ladies, then when she returned would discreetly hand me her knickers."

Now that's ok,but what if you didn't want to take it further,hand them back to her?!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm not sure that the beverage of choice alters the ability to suggest naughty shenanigans, unless you require people to be inebriated which is a WHOLE different thread and big old bag of issues. "

I think the beverage is important...

After a bottle of wine you think of having great sex.

After coffee you think shit I have to go to work.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure that the beverage of choice alters the ability to suggest naughty shenanigans, unless you require people to be inebriated which is a WHOLE different thread and big old bag of issues.

I get where the OP is coming from. On the whole i don't like coffee shops....full of people with kids etc etc.....a nice cosy bar though feels more conducive to getting flirty. Meeting in a coffee shop would be my nightmare meet."

I did the "knicker removal" sign meet in a wine bar. Lady wearing a nice dress and we could flirt closely to test the chemistry.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

I met a lady for a social but we agreed on a sign for if we wanted to take things further. Simply she would excuse herself go to the ladies, then when she returned would discreetly hand me her knickers.

Now that's ok,but what if you didn't want to take it further,hand them back to her?!"

Pmsl

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm not sure that the beverage of choice alters the ability to suggest naughty shenanigans, unless you require people to be inebriated which is a WHOLE different thread and big old bag of issues.

I get where the OP is coming from. On the whole i don't like coffee shops....full of people with kids etc etc.....a nice cosy bar though feels more conducive to getting flirty. Meeting in a coffee shop would be my nightmare meet."

Yes plus the cosy bar has music and candles...

Starbucks has people stealing the free wifi

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I met a lady for a social but we agreed on a sign for if we wanted to take things further. Simply she would excuse herself go to the ladies, then when she returned would discreetly hand me her knickers.

Now that's ok,but what if you didn't want to take it further,hand them back to her?!"

he could do a runner whilst she was on the loo

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just say

"Nice latte, I suppose a fuck is out of the question?"

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman  over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!


"

I met a lady for a social but we agreed on a sign for if we wanted to take things further. Simply she would excuse herself go to the ladies, then when she returned would discreetly hand me her knickers.

Now that's ok,but what if you didn't want to take it further,hand them back to her?!

he could do a runner whilst she was on the loo "

Well that would be less embarrassing than giving back the knick knacks in a coffee shop

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I met a lady for a social but we agreed on a sign for if we wanted to take things further. Simply she would excuse herself go to the ladies, then when she returned would discreetly hand me her knickers.

Now that's ok,but what if you didn't want to take it further,hand them back to her?!

he could do a runner whilst she was on the loo

Well that would be less embarrassing than giving back the knick knacks in a coffee shop "

yep - shes not gonna walk out swinging her drawers round her fingers saying 'well thats a no then' -

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Nothing better than a social with a chance of more if both sides are up for it. "

. . . and surely is that not the biggest reason for a social? Peeps meet hoping the chemistry works so they can then have a shag . . but the "social" also means there is no pre-arranged agenda.

Honestly, those that just meet others on here for a "social" and that's all are likely to be the biggest prick teasers, if not time-wasters, you're ever likely to find.

OP? You could always introduce into discussion whether your guest is open to "cream" delivered in utmost quality?

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman  over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!


"

I met a lady for a social but we agreed on a sign for if we wanted to take things further. Simply she would excuse herself go to the ladies, then when she returned would discreetly hand me her knickers.

Now that's ok,but what if you didn't want to take it further,hand them back to her?!

he could do a runner whilst she was on the loo

Well that would be less embarrassing than giving back the knick knacks in a coffee shop

yep - shes not gonna walk out swinging her drawers round her fingers saying 'well thats a no then' - "

Imagine that though,you disappear of to the loos imagining the wonderful thing's ahead,come out of the loos with your underwear stuffed in your hand to find.....an empty chair

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By *awandOrderCouple  over a year ago

SW London


"I usually meet someone for a drink and if we get along we move on to my place or a hotel.

Now this has alcohol involved so people can let their gaurd down and live for the moment.

Now with a coffee meet its just caffeine and we are usually dressed in our work clothes. So it's not ideal for hooking up.

How do I broach having sex over a latte?

"

I think as long as you don't use the toilets in the coffee shop, you're okay with this ... but then again? It does bring a certain image if 'work clothes' to mind, how bad are they?

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"I usually meet someone for a drink and if we get along we move on to my place or a hotel.

Now this has alcohol involved so people can let their gaurd down and live for the moment.

Now with a coffee meet its just caffeine and we are usually dressed in our work clothes. So it's not ideal for hooking up.

How do I broach having sex over a latte?

"

First ask the barista if they mind, then ensure the tables are cleared.

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By *ieutenantMan  over a year ago

london

I don't do social meet.too much expectation from both side.i prefer club meet or house party.

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By *xxxMan  over a year ago

Bedford & Chester


"I usually meet someone for a drink and if we get along we move on to my place or a hotel.

Now this has alcohol involved so people can let their gaurd down and live for the moment.

Now with a coffee meet its just caffeine and we are usually dressed in our work clothes. So it's not ideal for hooking up.

How do I broach having sex over a latte?

First ask the barista if they mind, then ensure the tables are cleared."

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By *awandOrderCouple  over a year ago

SW London


"I don't do social meet.too much expectation from both side.i prefer club meet or house party."

House parties can be sooooo much pressure. I never find socials a pressure, just a good laugh.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/06/16 13:25:08]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

You bloody nutcase!!!! I'll get you in wellies in a field with a flask of tea and a custard cream then let's see who gets lucky

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

To me a social is just that. Something to see how you get on and arranging something for a later date. The woman would have to make it fairly obvious she wanted more.

I had one social, we got on well, she said 'I need a fuck'. So we went to the woods and did.

I had another, whereby we had already discussed that if we got on, we would play straight after.

I've had another social where we sat chatting and parted. Later when I messaged her, she said she thought I wasn't interested because I hadn't touched her. Although we did play a few months later.

But usually a social is to find out if you want to play at a later date. Whether in a coffee shop or pub/bar.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Some men when you see them in the flesh are so sexy and better looking than their pics that I just want them then and there, sod the rules you make beforehand. Plus I'm a sucker for big shoulders and a nice big firm bum. They turn me into a weak willed woman!

Grrrrr throw me down and ravish me, stuff the Nescafe!

Those coffeeshop/hotel/services come in very handy at times

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If I meet for a coffee I'm not expecting sex. That's why it's a social. I prefer to go away after and think, yep I'd like to shag them or sometimes I think, actually no. And vice Versa. I'm not leading anyone on, it's crystal clear before we meet socially that it's just that.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Check in messages about the possibility of more happening beforehand. If the person says 'no' (as I usually do) then *never* push it on the day.

If you really want sex instead of a social, then meet people who want the same.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Honestly, those that just meet others on here for a "social" and that's all are likely to be the biggest prick teasers, if not time-wasters, you're ever likely to find.

"

All variations of 'prick tease' suggest that women should put out on a social meet regardless of how they feel about the person they are meeting.

It's gross. And kind of rapey. Non-consensual sex isn't ok, and nobody should ever feel shamed or embarrassed to say 'no' just because others might think they're a 'prick tease'.

Grow up and behave like an adult who understands that people have preferences.

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By *ay BrowerMan  over a year ago

Oldham

When I've met for coffee I have never expected anything sexual to happen but on 2 out of the 3 occasions it has and the other time we met the same night to take things further!!

You should never expect or try and force anything whether on a social or in a non social meet. Let things flow and don't feel or put anyone under any pressure.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I usually meet someone for a drink and if we get along we move on to my place or a hotel.

Now this has alcohol involved so people can let their gaurd down and live for the moment.

Now with a coffee meet its just caffeine and we are usually dressed in our work clothes. So it's not ideal for hooking up.

How do I broach having sex over a latte?

"

Ask them

Just ask

If your meeting off here they must know sex is on the cards at some point, just ask if they want to take it further

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/06/16 14:30:51]

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I usually meet someone for a drink and if we get along we move on to my place or a hotel.

Now this has alcohol involved so people can let their gaurd down and live for the moment.

Now with a coffee meet its just caffeine and we are usually dressed in our work clothes. So it's not ideal for hooking up.

How do I broach having sex over a latte?

I think as long as you don't use the toilets in the coffee shop, you're okay with this ... but then again? It does bring a certain image if 'work clothes' to mind, how bad are they?"

Work clothes are a three piece suit with a pocket watch. I usually lose the tie to show my edgy cool side

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You bloody nutcase!!!! I'll get you in wellies in a field with a flask of tea and a custard cream then let's see who gets lucky "

I don't do nature dates ... Walking in those fields will get mud on my Gucci loafers

But if you're up for it. We can meet at Starbucks, they have really nice bathrooms

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You bloody nutcase!!!! I'll get you in wellies in a field with a flask of tea and a custard cream then let's see who gets lucky

I don't do nature dates ... Walking in those fields will get mud on my Gucci loafers

But if you're up for it. We can meet at Starbucks, they have really nice bathrooms "

It'll be a squeeze but you do know after a dodgy meet in some dodgy toilets I'll expect 5* treatment. Wouldn't want you to lose your rep for bad treatment

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Honestly, those that just meet others on here for a "social" and that's all are likely to be the biggest prick teasers, if not time-wasters, you're ever likely to find.

All variations of 'prick tease' suggest that women should put out on a social meet regardless of how they feel about the person they are meeting.

It's gross. And kind of rapey. Non-consensual sex isn't ok, and nobody should ever feel shamed or embarrassed to say 'no' just because others might think they're a 'prick tease'.

Grow up and behave like an adult who understands that people have preferences."

If I have a coffee meet it's ALWAYS social only, possibly not even a kiss. I won't ever be persuaded otherwise.

I couldn't give a shit if anyone says that makes me a prick tease or anything else. That's clearly their issues, not mine.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Honestly, those that just meet others on here for a "social" and that's all are likely to be the biggest prick teasers, if not time-wasters, you're ever likely to find.

All variations of 'prick tease' suggest that women should put out on a social meet regardless of how they feel about the person they are meeting.

It's gross. And kind of rapey. Non-consensual sex isn't ok, and nobody should ever feel shamed or embarrassed to say 'no' just because others might think they're a 'prick tease'.

Grow up and behave like an adult who understands that people have preferences.

If I have a coffee meet it's ALWAYS social only, possibly not even a kiss. I won't ever be persuaded otherwise.

I couldn't give a shit if anyone says that makes me a prick tease or anything else. That's clearly their issues, not mine. "

So does that mean if you have a coffee meet with me ... You will not shave prior and wear mix and match underwear?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You bloody nutcase!!!! I'll get you in wellies in a field with a flask of tea and a custard cream then let's see who gets lucky

I don't do nature dates ... Walking in those fields will get mud on my Gucci loafers

But if you're up for it. We can meet at Starbucks, they have really nice bathrooms

It'll be a squeeze but you do know after a dodgy meet in some dodgy toilets I'll expect 5* treatment. Wouldn't want you to lose your rep for bad treatment "

The only 5 star treatment I can give is in a big city. I'm talking about a place that has more people than sheep

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By *rand Central CoupleCouple  over a year ago

Glasgow


"Ask the barista to write 'Fuck Me' in chocolate sprinkles on the top of her latte?

I might get slapped or arrested.

I'll stick with my tried and true method.

After she is almost done with her latte....

I'll lean over , throwing caution into the wind.

And whisper in her ear " Can I piss on you "

"

Some iof those coffees are just too large.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Ask the barista to write 'Fuck Me' in chocolate sprinkles on the top of her latte?

I might get slapped or arrested.

I'll stick with my tried and true method.

After she is almost done with her latte....

I'll lean over , throwing caution into the wind.

And whisper in her ear " Can I piss on you "

Some iof those coffees are just too large."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You bloody nutcase!!!! I'll get you in wellies in a field with a flask of tea and a custard cream then let's see who gets lucky

I don't do nature dates ... Walking in those fields will get mud on my Gucci loafers

But if you're up for it. We can meet at Starbucks, they have really nice bathrooms

It'll be a squeeze but you do know after a dodgy meet in some dodgy toilets I'll expect 5* treatment. Wouldn't want you to lose your rep for bad treatment

The only 5 star treatment I can give is in a big city. I'm talking about a place that has more people than sheep "

Haha cows and horses here you'll love it finish the day with a real ale in a country pub with a big log fire talking to the locals about ferrets and whippets

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham

Sometimes the subject doesn't have to come up, other things do.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Could redefine the whole salted caramel latte........

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By *radleywigginsMan  over a year ago

northwest

It seems to me that if you've agreed to meet (for coffee) the subject of sex will more than likely have been broached beforehand. The nature of this website indicates that it's likely common ground!

I would make it clear that there would be obligations or expectations from either party following a coffee meet, but, it seems that the most likely scenario is that you're by this point needing a good reason to take things further at some point. Ie. You've impressed me online, you're going to have to work hard to repulse me over coffee..

In practical terms meet around the corner from a place where you could take things further if you both agree. You still get the 'neutral territory' aspect, but it's sexier knowing within minutes you could be indulging in something more stimulating than caffeine..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Honestly, those that just meet others on here for a "social" and that's all are likely to be the biggest prick teasers, if not time-wasters, you're ever likely to find.

All variations of 'prick tease' suggest that women should put out on a social meet regardless of how they feel about the person they are meeting.

It's gross. And kind of rapey. Non-consensual sex isn't ok, and nobody should ever feel shamed or embarrassed to say 'no' just because others might think they're a 'prick tease'.

Grow up and behave like an adult who understands that people have preferences.

If I have a coffee meet it's ALWAYS social only, possibly not even a kiss. I won't ever be persuaded otherwise.

I couldn't give a shit if anyone says that makes me a prick tease or anything else. That's clearly their issues, not mine.

So does that mean if you have a coffee meet with me ... You will not shave prior and wear mix and match underwear?"

Nope. But I meet half way. No cafés half way.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"It seems to me that if you've agreed to meet (for coffee) the subject of sex will more than likely have been broached beforehand. The nature of this website indicates that it's likely common ground!

I would make it clear that there would be obligations or expectations from either party following a coffee meet, but, it seems that the most likely scenario is that you're by this point needing a good reason to take things further at some point. Ie. You've impressed me online, you're going to have to work hard to repulse me over coffee..

In practical terms meet around the corner from a place where you could take things further if you both agree. You still get the 'neutral territory' aspect, but it's sexier knowing within minutes you could be indulging in something more stimulating than caffeine.."

You sir are a genius... I'm going to cancel the coffee social and book a hotel room... If she wants coffee she can order room service..

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You bloody nutcase!!!! I'll get you in wellies in a field with a flask of tea and a custard cream then let's see who gets lucky

I don't do nature dates ... Walking in those fields will get mud on my Gucci loafers

But if you're up for it. We can meet at Starbucks, they have really nice bathrooms

It'll be a squeeze but you do know after a dodgy meet in some dodgy toilets I'll expect 5* treatment. Wouldn't want you to lose your rep for bad treatment

The only 5 star treatment I can give is in a big city. I'm talking about a place that has more people than sheep

Haha cows and horses here you'll love it finish the day with a real ale in a country pub with a big log fire talking to the locals about ferrets and whippets "

The locals would love me... In that small village I'd be like a raisin surrounded by peanuts.... They probably haven't seen a black man in so long. They would call me Michael Jackson

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Honestly, those that just meet others on here for a "social" and that's all are likely to be the biggest prick teasers, if not time-wasters, you're ever likely to find.

All variations of 'prick tease' suggest that women should put out on a social meet regardless of how they feel about the person they are meeting.

It's gross. And kind of rapey. Non-consensual sex isn't ok, and nobody should ever feel shamed or embarrassed to say 'no' just because others might think they're a 'prick tease'.

Grow up and behave like an adult who understands that people have preferences.

If I have a coffee meet it's ALWAYS social only, possibly not even a kiss. I won't ever be persuaded otherwise.

I couldn't give a shit if anyone says that makes me a prick tease or anything else. That's clearly their issues, not mine.

So does that mean if you have a coffee meet with me ... You will not shave prior and wear mix and match underwear?

Nope. But I meet half way. No cafés half way. "

Ok just promise you will wear those boots and you have a deal... I even stretch myself a let you order a large

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You bloody nutcase!!!! I'll get you in wellies in a field with a flask of tea and a custard cream then let's see who gets lucky

I don't do nature dates ... Walking in those fields will get mud on my Gucci loafers

But if you're up for it. We can meet at Starbucks, they have really nice bathrooms

It'll be a squeeze but you do know after a dodgy meet in some dodgy toilets I'll expect 5* treatment. Wouldn't want you to lose your rep for bad treatment

The only 5 star treatment I can give is in a big city. I'm talking about a place that has more people than sheep

Haha cows and horses here you'll love it finish the day with a real ale in a country pub with a big log fire talking to the locals about ferrets and whippets

The locals would love me... In that small village I'd be like a raisin surrounded by peanuts.... They probably haven't seen a black man in so long. They would call me Michael Jackson "

Haha Michael Jackson was a white guy. Everyone country yocal knows that!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


". . . Grow up and behave like an adult who understands that people have preferences."

Oh we are Young Lady, we are and your comments are simply you trying to twist our words to add your own.

Fact is as we're sure many others have similarly experienced social meets that just didn't quite seem right, meets that took ages to arrange and often had more than enough exchange of information and pix beforehand to make more than a calculated guess, sometimes even much more than so, that the opportunity for sex was already "factored in". You meet and cannot understand how the people sat opposite seem nothing like all the communication that went on before . . needless to say the social, pleasant as it was, ends with no future.

You are left wondering why BOTH parties put so much effort into this meeting for one party to go ahead with it with seemingly no intention of carrying through ANY of THEIR words? Masses of chances prior to the meet to say "sorry, not for us" had been ignored?

Thankfully most don't do this or it would prove highly destructive to the practise . . but there are some out there for which the terms "prick teaser" and "time-waster" are most valid.

That you seek to add your own diatribe and abusive comments to these words simply shows it is you that needs to grow up Young Lady. Go and pin your tail on another donkey . . and lighten up!

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By *otgirl32Woman  over a year ago

Ashton Under Lyne

I would never exclude the possibility of proceeding to sex after a coffee social, why the hell not ? It's often not convenient due to time of the day / other circumstances but yes, I've met blokes at a coffee shop and then driven off with them.

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By *ohnaronMan  over a year ago

london

Grind and bump I guess

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By *ady LickWoman  over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I've only ever gone back to one guys house after a social. I knew he had taken the afternoon off, I was pretty sure he fancied me, we had finished our coffees, he asked if I wanted another one. I asked him if he had any at his place and off we went. It was risky but we had been chatting online and I was feeling particularly horny....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


". . . Grow up and behave like an adult who understands that people have preferences.

Oh we are Young Lady, we are and your comments are simply you trying to twist our words to add your own.

Fact is as we're sure many others have similarly experienced social meets that just didn't quite seem right, meets that took ages to arrange and often had more than enough exchange of information and pix beforehand to make more than a calculated guess, sometimes even much more than so, that the opportunity for sex was already "factored in". You meet and cannot understand how the people sat opposite seem nothing like all the communication that went on before . . needless to say the social, pleasant as it was, ends with no future.

You are left wondering why BOTH parties put so much effort into this meeting for one party to go ahead with it with seemingly no intention of carrying through ANY of THEIR words? Masses of chances prior to the meet to say "sorry, not for us" had been ignored?

Thankfully most don't do this or it would prove highly destructive to the practise . . but there are some out there for which the terms "prick teaser" and "time-waster" are most valid.

That you seek to add your own diatribe and abusive comments to these words simply shows it is you that needs to grow up Young Lady. Go and pin your tail on another donkey . . and lighten up!"

A social is to decide if you want to take things further. It's not a guarantee for a fuck.

You could be interested in someone online, hence why you arrange a social, and then find out that in person they just don't do anything for you.

Your rant sounds like you're bitter that you've been rejected a few times in person when you expected the other person to go to bed with you. Perhaps you need to consider why people are rejecting you in person - it's generally not because they never j tended to follow through.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


". . . Fact is as we're sure many others have similarly experienced social meets that just didn't quite seem right, meets that took ages to arrange and often had more than enough exchange of information and pix beforehand to make more than a calculated guess, sometimes even much more than so, that the opportunity for sex was already "factored in". You meet and cannot understand how the people sat opposite seem nothing like all the communication that went on before . . needless to say the social, pleasant as it was, ends with no future.

You are left wondering why BOTH parties put so much effort into this meeting for one party to go ahead with it with seemingly no intention of carrying through ANY of THEIR words? Masses of chances prior to the meet to say "sorry, not for us" had been ignored?

Thankfully most don't do this or it would prove highly destructive to the practise . . but there are some out there for which the terms "prick teaser" and "time-waster" are most valid. . . . "


". . . Your rant sounds like you're bitter that you've been rejected a few times in person when you expected the other person to go to bed with you. Perhaps you need to consider why people are rejecting you in person - it's generally not because they never j tended to follow through."

You really can't read very well, can you. Our "rant", as you call it and again you seek to use your own words, is simply a statement of what some couples can find from other couples and we reckon rather a good number of solo-males find from other solo-females too. When it does happen, and thankfully we don't think it's a huge issue, it can undermine the clear reasons for a "social meeting" . . but let's not forget this is a "SEX DATING SITE" not a "FRIENDSHIP DATING SITE" so what's next after a social is in so many cases the ONLY reason for the social?

We never use the word "rejected", that you do gives an insight into your own mind perchance, and any conclusion of "Thanks, but no thanks" cuts both ways. We have a great list of "fuck buddies" on this site so we'll ignore your childish dribbling.

Naturally looking at your profile we see you are "gender queer" and, without making any personal conclusions, we do see that your own "life style chioce" of sexuality rather does seem to be a recurring subject of far too many forum posts, doesn't it? Would that be then why you feel the need to express yourself unnecessarily in anger?

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