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Group chat advice

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Hi all,

We're after a bit of advice/opinions regarding group chats on WhatsApp with other couples.

One of our own little rules when chatting to others on here is that we only swap numbers between the same sexes. Recently however, we've started doing group chats with other couples.

Now then, we started a group chat with another couple, it was going great, we all got on really well, met up, had a great time. We were chatting one day on the group chat when the female of the other couple said she was too busy to chat, while the female from our side wasn't replying as she was busy at work. So, I thought, this isn't fair on the girls for there phones to be going off just for the two males to chat. I messaged the male one to one saying if the girls are ever busy and he fancies a chat, he can message me one to one.

Now then, I received a message later along the lines of saying that I was wrong, was going against trust etc... Next morning, group chat is cancelled, they've removed us as friends on FAB.

We're not here to criticise them, we totally respect that everyone has different boundries, rules, trust levels etc... We just feel pretty bad and slightly guilty, so, is this how most people would react in a situation like this?

Any opinions/advice is appreciated.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

On our couple profile we used to do group chats on kik. Our rule was if ever anyone tried to communicate outside the group they were out. Invariably they did try sneaky side chats and we got rid. No need.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"On our couple profile we used to do group chats on kik. Our rule was if ever anyone tried to communicate outside the group they were out. Invariably they did try sneaky side chats and we got rid. No need."

Ah cool, cheers for the advice. We feel the same if a male contacted female or vice versa, but are more than comfortable with females-females and male-male getting to know each other seperatly.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We have had a couple of group chats with other couples. With one of the couples we have both group chats and one to one, him with him and her with her, not mixed one to one chats. These chats are not sexual, just like normal everyday conversations between friends.

It is a shame they have broken contact over this after a successful meet. If he didn't feel comfortable about it he could simply replied saying he prefered to stick with the group chat. If their phones going off all the time bothered the ladies they could have turned their notifications off. Is there any way you can contact them with an 'I'm sorry, can we start again please?" message?

Hope you manage to sort it out.

D

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"We have had a couple of group chats with other couples. With one of the couples we have both group chats and one to one, him with him and her with her, not mixed one to one chats. These chats are not sexual, just like normal everyday conversations between friends.

It is a shame they have broken contact over this after a successful meet. If he didn't feel comfortable about it he could simply replied saying he prefered to stick with the group chat. If their phones going off all the time bothered the ladies they could have turned their notifications off. Is there any way you can contact them with an 'I'm sorry, can we start again please?" message?

Hope you manage to sort it out.

D"

Thank you. The one to one chat wasn't going to be sexual, just a normal chat between two guys. We would not of been bothered in the slightest if they had said 'can we stick to the group chat please, it's one of our little rules'.

I know what you mean about the notifications, I was just worried because my partner works with the public and you don't always know when the chat will start.

To be honest, they were great people, we just think maybe it's best to go seperate ways...

Thank you very much for the opinion.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

we had a couple where i chatted with just the fem - so i thought - turned out the male could see and had been chatting - deleted them straight away - but i dont think we would have a problem with the 2 guys chatting but maybe in hindsight best to have checked with all concerned first

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"we had a couple where i chatted with just the fem - so i thought - turned out the male could see and had been chatting - deleted them straight away - but i dont think we would have a problem with the 2 guys chatting but maybe in hindsight best to have checked with all concerned first"

Thank you! I guess we live and learn and will take this experience forward.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Should add we did give warnings asking to keep it in the main chat. Never worked for us, they always tried the sneaky so now we always keep messages on fab on the couple profile.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Should add we did give warnings asking to keep it in the main chat. Never worked for us, they always tried the sneaky so now we always keep messages on fab on the couple profile. "

Ah, that's fair enough. We never received a warning as such, nor was the message I sent out the group chat trying to start anything, it was an offer. Also, when we were messaging on here amd suggested swapping numbers, we only received his, it was then us who suggested a group chat and he set one up. Previous to that, no mention of group chat.

Thanks again and like we say, we'll learn from this and move forward.

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By *iggles and BeardyCouple  over a year ago

Bristol

No clue, only messeges we ever got were single guys saying "she is hot let's fuck" or "how are you". So we gave up.

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