FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Should you need to get to know and like someone before sex.......?
Should you need to get to know and like someone before sex.......?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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For me you do..after being on here for a while I now realise that for good sex it is necessary to get to know and like someone otherwise the sex is generally crap - I have however enjoyed great sex on occasion based on pure animal attraction alone but it seldoms happens now as I get older-I tend to want to know the person - what do others think? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i've been fucking some guys for over a year and they don't even know my name. 
i'd like to get to know people and have more of a laugh and chat with them but i'm the same as them really and not open to giving much away to people because i don't really trust that anyone cares anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the most you get to know someone the better the sex.
But for someone you don't know very well that's when you fuck.
For me there is a difference between sex and fucking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I absolutely need to get to know and like someone before I feel comfortable enough to have sex with them!
However - I appreciate that others want/prefer instant gratification and wouldn't dream of judging them for it!
For me the best thing about fab is that we're all different - and hopefully there's someone out there for everyone!  |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
Not always, no....
We've met lots of people at parties that we haven't know their names or anything about them until afterwards. The sex has been great!
Where on the other hand, we've got to know a few couples fairly well and got on great socially. Yet just haven't 'clicked' sexually when we've eventually got naked with them.
There are others that we've meeting for years and get on great both in and out the bedroom. Consider them real friends.
So I'm saying, yes, no and maybe.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For me you do..after being on here for a while I now realise that for good sex it is necessary to get to know and like someone otherwise the sex is generally crap - I have however enjoyed great sex on occasion based on pure animal attraction alone but it seldoms happens now as I get older-I tend to want to know the person - what do others think?"
Impersonal is generally best for me. Though I admit to having great sessions with people who have become good friends as well. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I am also a very private person and don't give out a lot to folk...certainly not my real names as I have a Facebook profile etc. I also believe your fab life should be kept separate from your day to day life! |
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By *lighty1Woman
over a year ago
You Dont Need to Know, right now |
When I'm in the mood for "quick and dirty" sex, I go to a swingers club, where I can be playing with someone within 5 minutes of meeting them. On Fab, though, I would definitely want to get to know the person a lot better, before getting down to the sex.
And preferably, meeting again regularly. Different options for different moods.
And, being a single female, my concerns about my safety wouldn't allow me to arrange a private sex meet with a man, without knowing him at least quite well, beforehand. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I (Mr) suffer with major anxiety issues, so I do find it much easier, and far more prone to satisfying outcomes, if we have gotten to know our meets a bit.
General our re-meets go a lot better that first timers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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nsa doesn't require getting to know each other but then getting to know each other doesn't prohibit nsa.
Remember - variety truly is the spice of life.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think I could fully express myself with someone if I don't feel comfortable with a person or know them even a little bit "
funny but i'm the other way round i find it easier to be myself and really dirty with somebody i don't know, once i get to know them i feel a little incase they think i'm wierd, but if its somebody new it don't matter what they think as i don't have to see them again so i can really let myself go |
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By *MaleMan
over a year ago
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No strings getting to know, appeal, striking up a rapport before deciding to meet always adds to the 2 way connection during fun.
Wham bam, complete stranger sex has never appealed. However each to their own, horses for courses. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Had meets of both types in the past. I now like a social first, just my thing. However I do have fond memories of midnight dashes across the countryside for a random meet, I was younger, it was exciting (and I like driving!) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think, I equally like both.
I love the idea of just wanting someone so much that you don't need to know anything or say anything and can Fuck and get I out your system.
Other times it's good to get to know people too. Their likes and dislikes, be able to have a chat before during and after, haha. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I dont need to know anything about them before I get intimate, it is nsa, although with my last date I had, we dine and wined first and got to know eachother over a nice pizza and then shagged, sometimes it is refreshing as the date lasts longer too  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For me you do..after being on here for a while I now realise that for good sex it is necessary to get to know and like someone otherwise the sex is generally crap - I have however enjoyed great sex on occasion based on pure animal attraction alone but it seldoms happens now as I get older-I tend to want to know the person - what do others think?"
I think an attraction is necessary and passion you don't have to be in love to feel either and we use the word love to easily anyway ????
And more to the point it's the journey to having sex that makes good sex
We an all fuck and on occasion we have sex and on the very rare occasion (well in my case anyway) we make love
I have had this discussion menu times and I actually think we can make love without being in love
You might think this a load of rubbish and it probably is
But at the end of the day if we enjoy the moment/ act then isn't that enough |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Absolutely not , and we find its all the more passionate and horny when we don't know the people we fuck .
By and large the more we know the people we fuck , the less exciting and horny it becomes .
Nothing beats the adrenaline and rush that goes with a first meet .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Absolutely not , and we find its all the more passionate and horny when we don't know the people we fuck .
By and large the more we know the people we fuck , the less exciting and horny it becomes .
Nothing beats the adrenaline and rush that goes with a first meet .
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Hi I haven't a clue who you are fancy meeting up lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think I could fully express myself with someone if I don't feel comfortable with a person or know them even a little bit
funny but i'm the other way round i find it easier to be myself and really dirty with somebody i don't know, once i get to know them i feel a little incase they think i'm wierd, but if its somebody new it don't matter what they think as i don't have to see them again so i can really let myself go "
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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago
Filthy Fuckeryville |
I always like a social first, but in the same breath will admit that the best threesome I ever had with my ex was a guy he'd arranged half an hour previous - no clue what was gonna turn up! I didn't even know he was until he did!!! Lmao |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having done both, and now that my needs have changed, i much prefer getting to know someone.
Rarely do i do a fuck n go kind of meet.
They just bore me now..  |
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By *otgirl32Woman
over a year ago
Ashton Under Lyne |
"For me you do..after being on here for a while I now realise that for good sex it is necessary to get to know and like someone otherwise the sex is generally crap - I have however enjoyed great sex on occasion based on pure animal attraction alone but it seldoms happens now as I get older-I tend to want to know the person - what do others think?"
It's a bit of both. Sex is definitely better after knowing the guy and talking a few weeks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We always find it better to fuck first before too much chat. Then if you find later that you get on well then further meets will be enhanced.
Sometimes too much chat can spoil the meet. After all the whole purpose of meeting is to fuck and be fucked. It's not about making friends. Although friendships do happen. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me I have to get to know the person. By getting an insight into their personality I get to understand their likes and dislikes and vice versa. That way I know how to give them pleasure. Also it helps ease with conversation in between. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We always insist on a social first and so glad we do because some of the meets we have had must use pics from ten years ago and look totally different to their pics and we believe all parties need to be attracted to each other physically. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We always insist on a social first and so glad we do because some of the meets we have had must use pics from ten years ago and look totally different to their pics and we believe all parties need to be attracted to each other physically."
We totally agree that there has to be attraction physically .
Maybe we have just been very fortunate , but there has never been an instance of us turning up and finding the people we meet don't look anything like their pics .
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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago
Wakefield |
No very often getting to know someone is counterproductive to good sex.
Part of the buzz of NSA sex comes from having sex with a stranger.
Perhaps those who want to get to know others before sex should arrange a few "blind" meets were they have sex with strangers with little pre contact and those who don't want to get to know others before sex should arrange a few meets were they get to know those they are meeting before they indulge in sex with them. |
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"I absolutely need to get to know and like someone before I feel comfortable enough to have sex with them!
However - I appreciate that others want/prefer instant gratification and wouldn't dream of judging them for it!
For me the best thing about fab is that we're all different - and hopefully there's someone out there for everyone! "
Just this! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have to. I would feel bad about meeting someone and having to walk away because there is no attraction. A pretty face doesn't do it for me; neither does a big cock. I don't want someone who might possibly undress,want me to suck before he sticks it in,pumps for 5 minutes,comes and goes.
I don't have to be best buddies but I need to chat a bit to feel the urge. |
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