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U21s too young?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Been looking on the forums a lot today and seen a lot of talk about people under 21 being too young to be on here,
I'm 19, turning 20 and I've been on here for almost a year and a half including my old account from back at home, and I can understand why some people may think 21 and younger is too early to be getting involved but it's something that I would definitely disagree with,
I think once your 18 you're definitely aware enough to be able to weigh up what it is you like, what it is you dislike and what it is that you want to try out.
Personally I'd say that starting when I was 18 was great, I've been able to meet new people and help to fulfil many of their fantasies as well as some of my own, away from the sex/swinging side of things (I'm aware I'm not a full swinger) I think that meeting these older women and couples has really helped me mature a lot faster and be more comfortable around much older people in general which can only be a positive.
Obviously everybody is different and some other 18 year olds will not mature or react to it in the same way in which I have but at least they know from an early(ish)  age that it's not for them, which must surely help to get rid of any lingering "what ifs" for them in the future.
But all in all I can see where you're coming from but I think everybody's different, and regardless of age everybody see's their own world in their own way and its up to each person to do whatever it is that they want to do in it, if older people enjoy meeting with younger people then great, if not then no harm done everyone will just get on with what they're doing 
Opinions? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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At 18/19 I would have agreed with you, but now as a Mum of an almost teenager; 18-21 years seems very young to me, not just for swinging but more in general - but I was Married and had a baby by the time I was 21 so really can't judge.
Going back to when I was slightly younger, I can see I made choices that I thought were completely the right decision for me at the time but with hindsight I can see that they were anything but - But you live and learn, luckily I don't live with any regrets, I just chalk it up as experience. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sexual maturity wasn't really encouraged to us 'older folk'.
Sex was something secretive, supposed to be done with someone you 'love' and if you didn't you were shameful, and STDs were never talked about until the AIDS epidemic (not epic here but elsewhere and could have become so here too).
In the 1960s you could be declared mentally ill for having children (ie. sex) outside of marriage, if female anyway.
That's the kind of mentality you're up against really. One what was a lot different than today, and not all of us subscribed to that mindset but plenty did, even if it wasn't what they wanted. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sexual maturity wasn't really encouraged to us 'older folk'.
Sex was something secretive, supposed to be done with someone you 'love' and if you didn't you were shameful, and STDs were never talked about until the AIDS epidemic (not epic here but elsewhere and could have become so here too).
In the 1960s you could be declared mentally ill for having children (ie. sex) outside of marriage, if female anyway.
That's the kind of mentality you're up against really. One what was a lot different than today, and not all of us subscribed to that mindset but plenty did, even if it wasn't what they wanted."
Have you never heard of the swinging sixties?  |
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When I was younger I didn't consider swinging as I was out meeting and dating girls in the 'normal' way. However I did use swinging sites etc for meets as Abi as obviously that wasn't something I could really do any other way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sexual maturity wasn't really encouraged to us 'older folk'.
Sex was something secretive, supposed to be done with someone you 'love' and if you didn't you were shameful, and STDs were never talked about until the AIDS epidemic (not epic here but elsewhere and could have become so here too).
In the 1960s you could be declared mentally ill for having children (ie. sex) outside of marriage, if female anyway.
That's the kind of mentality you're up against really. One what was a lot different than today, and not all of us subscribed to that mindset but plenty did, even if it wasn't what they wanted.
Have you never heard of the swinging sixties? "
How many people embraced that side of things though, really?
And people were still being shoved in mental institutes then for being sexy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sexual maturity wasn't really encouraged to us 'older folk'.
Sex was something secretive, supposed to be done with someone you 'love' and if you didn't you were shameful, and STDs were never talked about until the AIDS epidemic (not epic here but elsewhere and could have become so here too).
In the 1960s you could be declared mentally ill for having children (ie. sex) outside of marriage, if female anyway.
That's the kind of mentality you're up against really. One what was a lot different than today, and not all of us subscribed to that mindset but plenty did, even if it wasn't what they wanted.
Have you never heard of the swinging sixties?
How many people embraced that side of things though, really?
And people were still being shoved in mental institutes then for being sexy."
Quite a lot. And where on earth do you get that from? As the son of an unmarried 17 year old mother in the 60's I can assure you she wasn't considered mental and carried on in her responsible job with a firm of solicitors after I was born. Though on the other hand it could explain some of the things she made me wear at the time |
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"Sexual maturity wasn't really encouraged to us 'older folk'.
Sex was something secretive, supposed to be done with someone you 'love' and if you didn't you were shameful, and STDs were never talked about until the AIDS epidemic (not epic here but elsewhere and could have become so here too).
In the 1960s you could be declared mentally ill for having children (ie. sex) outside of marriage, if female anyway.
That's the kind of mentality you're up against really. One what was a lot different than today, and not all of us subscribed to that mindset but plenty did, even if it wasn't what they wanted.
Have you never heard of the swinging sixties?
How many people embraced that side of things though, really?
And people were still being shoved in mental institutes then for being sexy.
Quite a lot. And where on earth do you get that from? As the son of an unmarried 17 year old mother in the 60's I can assure you she wasn't considered mental and carried on in her responsible job with a firm of solicitors after I was born. Though on the other hand it could explain some of the things she made me wear at the time "
My boys, now young men, have never forgiven me for dressing them the same, especially those bob the builder yellow dungarees (sent by their nan). Worst thing is we have a lovely photo of them in it. This was in the nineties though ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Been looking on the forums a lot today and seen a lot of talk about people under 21 being too young to be on here,
I'm 19, turning 20 and I've been on here for almost a year and a half including my old account from back at home, and I can understand why some people may think 21 and younger is too early to be getting involved but it's something that I would definitely disagree with,
I think once your 18 you're definitely aware enough to be able to weigh up what it is you like, what it is you dislike and what it is that you want to try out.
Personally I'd say that starting when I was 18 was great, I've been able to meet new people and help to fulfil many of their fantasies as well as some of my own, away from the sex/swinging side of things (I'm aware I'm not a full swinger) I think that meeting these older women and couples has really helped me mature a lot faster and be more comfortable around much older people in general which can only be a positive.
Obviously everybody is different and some other 18 year olds will not mature or react to it in the same way in which I have but at least they know from an early(ish) age that it's not for them, which must surely help to get rid of any lingering "what ifs" for them in the future.
But all in all I can see where you're coming from but I think everybody's different, and regardless of age everybody see's their own world in their own way and its up to each person to do whatever it is that they want to do in it, if older people enjoy meeting with younger people then great, if not then no harm done everyone will just get on with what they're doing
Opinions?"
When your late 40s then we only see people your age as children...and laugh anyone our age who would meet a 19 yr old for sex we would see as unhinged ,why do you want to fuck people older than your mother |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sexual maturity wasn't really encouraged to us 'older folk'.
Sex was something secretive, supposed to be done with someone you 'love' and if you didn't you were shameful, and STDs were never talked about until the AIDS epidemic (not epic here but elsewhere and could have become so here too).
In the 1960s you could be declared mentally ill for having children (ie. sex) outside of marriage, if female anyway.
That's the kind of mentality you're up against really. One what was a lot different than today, and not all of us subscribed to that mindset but plenty did, even if it wasn't what they wanted.
Have you never heard of the swinging sixties?
How many people embraced that side of things though, really?
And people were still being shoved in mental institutes then for being sexy.
Quite a lot. And where on earth do you get that from? As the son of an unmarried 17 year old mother in the 60's I can assure you she wasn't considered mental and carried on in her responsible job with a firm of solicitors after I was born. Though on the other hand it could explain some of the things she made me wear at the time "
It was pretty much being phased out by then, i still do remember it because it's quite shocking to me half the stuff people got locked up for in this country. Got it from documentaries about mental health, plus i used to like reading about it as well. That kind of stuff's interesting to me and the treatment of disabled people over history as well.
I've got family members that were of the mentality that if you had a child young/unmarried you let your parents bring it up and that child was your brother/sister, this happened in the 70s. Was really sad seeing the effects of that when the truth finally came out tbh. Glad everything changed though, as a single parent mysef who's never been married.
Lol, dying to know what she made you wear. |
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We have no problem with young people choosing to swing, whether at clubs or via websites. As long as they're consenting adults I don't think it matters.
It is unlikely we would meet anyone under 21, as we have children around age 20. We also normally want to click with our meets, which is less likely with someone so young.
Nita |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sexual maturity wasn't really encouraged to us 'older folk'.
Sex was something secretive, supposed to be done with someone you 'love' and if you didn't you were shameful, and STDs were never talked about until the AIDS epidemic (not epic here but elsewhere and could have become so here too).
In the 1960s you could be declared mentally ill for having children (ie. sex) outside of marriage, if female anyway.
That's the kind of mentality you're up against really. One what was a lot different than today, and not all of us subscribed to that mindset but plenty did, even if it wasn't what they wanted.
Have you never heard of the swinging sixties?
How many people embraced that side of things though, really?
And people were still being shoved in mental institutes then for being sexy.
Quite a lot. And where on earth do you get that from? As the son of an unmarried 17 year old mother in the 60's I can assure you she wasn't considered mental and carried on in her responsible job with a firm of solicitors after I was born. Though on the other hand it could explain some of the things she made me wear at the time
It was pretty much being phased out by then, i still do remember it because it's quite shocking to me half the stuff people got locked up for in this country. Got it from documentaries about mental health, plus i used to like reading about it as well. That kind of stuff's interesting to me and the treatment of disabled people over history as well.
I've got family members that were of the mentality that if you had a child young/unmarried you let your parents bring it up and that child was your brother/sister, this happened in the 70s. Was really sad seeing the effects of that when the truth finally came out tbh. Glad everything changed though, as a single parent mysef who's never been married.
Lol, dying to know what she made you wear."
Thats between me and my psychiatrist |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Consenting adults! Age ain't nothing but a number! Charm and intelligence outweigh any age stigma for us! "
Spot on!
But I do prefer that the person does not (still) live with their parents as an absolute minimum of life experience helps. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sexual maturity wasn't really encouraged to us 'older folk'.
Sex was something secretive, supposed to be done with someone you 'love' and if you didn't you were shameful, and STDs were never talked about until the AIDS epidemic (not epic here but elsewhere and could have become so here too).
In the 1960s you could be declared mentally ill for having children (ie. sex) outside of marriage, if female anyway.
That's the kind of mentality you're up against really. One what was a lot different than today, and not all of us subscribed to that mindset but plenty did, even if it wasn't what they wanted.
Have you never heard of the swinging sixties?
How many people embraced that side of things though, really?
And people were still being shoved in mental institutes then for being sexy.
Quite a lot. And where on earth do you get that from? As the son of an unmarried 17 year old mother in the 60's I can assure you she wasn't considered mental and carried on in her responsible job with a firm of solicitors after I was born. Though on the other hand it could explain some of the things she made me wear at the time
It was pretty much being phased out by then, i still do remember it because it's quite shocking to me half the stuff people got locked up for in this country. Got it from documentaries about mental health, plus i used to like reading about it as well. That kind of stuff's interesting to me and the treatment of disabled people over history as well.
I've got family members that were of the mentality that if you had a child young/unmarried you let your parents bring it up and that child was your brother/sister, this happened in the 70s. Was really sad seeing the effects of that when the truth finally came out tbh. Glad everything changed though, as a single parent mysef who's never been married.
Lol, dying to know what she made you wear.
Thats between me and my psychiatrist "
Probably for the best. And i'm too nosey. |
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age is just a number, there's guys twice your age that act your age. Then you get younger men that are very mature 
