FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Labels - Straight, Gay,Bi - Are they pointless?
Labels - Straight, Gay,Bi - Are they pointless?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I keep coming across people saying these types of labels are pointless. Just go with what feels right they say.
What is the wider _iew on this?
Our _iew is that they are a vital tool to let strangers know what they can expect from us and how we expect them to behave in return. Being a straight guy other guys will know they cannot expect a blowjob from me or vice versa.
Interestingly we notice that those (mainly guys) who suggest that this type of label is pointless are usually gay/bi guys with straight profiles.
Never straight guys with fake gay profiles.
I will put my body armour on now and await the replies.  |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"I keep coming across people saying these types of labels are pointless. Just go with what feels right they say.
What is the wider _iew on this?
Our _iew is that they are a vital tool to let strangers know what they can expect from us and how we expect them to behave in return. Being a straight guy other guys will know they cannot expect a blowjob from me or vice versa.
Interestingly we notice that those (mainly guys) who suggest that this type of label is pointless are usually gay/bi guys with straight profiles.
Never straight guys with fake gay profiles.
I will put my body armour on now and await the replies. "
I don't have a _iew one way or the other; if I am with a woman then she must be either bisexual or very confused 
I just want to know how you know this: "Interestingly we notice that those (mainly guys) who suggest that this type of label is pointless are usually gay/bi guys with straight profiles." |
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My _iew is that, it really dont matter, if you guys meet a guy couple or whatever,then you are supposed to lay down limits.
As for the lables on here, there aint enough to describe everyone so most put straight, chances are you have already met someone (either socially or a play meet) that dosnt fit the label "straight "
End of the day if guide lines are set then you should be fine, plus I doubt any bi guy would just touch someone with out asking, and if they ask and its not your thing say no and carry on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Obviously there is a point to labels, the problem comes when people lie.
People do this for a number of reasons, but the biggest is they think it may alter their chances of getting a shag.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My _iew is that, it really dont matter, if you guys meet a guy couple or whatever,then you are supposed to lay down limits.
As for the lables on here, there aint enough to describe everyone so most put straight, chances are you have already met someone (either socially or a play meet) that dosnt fit the label "straight "
End of the day if guide lines are set then you should be fine, plus I doubt any bi guy would just touch someone with out asking, and if they ask and its not your thing say no and carry on "
You are in fact wrong with your assumption. A "straight" guy in a mmf with us a while back wrapped his lips around my cock without warning. I immediately lost my erection, Mrs J burst out laughing at the look of shock on my face and the guy left immediately in a huff.
It strikes me that only a few labels are in fact necessary -Gay,Bi and Bi- curious. It is not complicated.
Honest use of these 3 would help avoid the sort of embarrassing experience just mentioned.
In essence I am saying that labels do matter when communicating with strangers. Very much indeed.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My _iew is that, it really dont matter, if you guys meet a guy couple or whatever,then you are supposed to lay down limits.
As for the lables on here, there aint enough to describe everyone so most put straight, chances are you have already met someone (either socially or a play meet) that dosnt fit the label "straight "
End of the day if guide lines are set then you should be fine, plus I doubt any bi guy would just touch someone with out asking, and if they ask and its not your thing say no and carry on
You are in fact wrong with your assumption. A "straight" guy in a mmf with us a while back wrapped his lips around my cock without warning. I immediately lost my erection, Mrs J burst out laughing at the look of shock on my face and the guy left immediately in a huff.
It strikes me that only a few labels are in fact necessary -Gay,Bi and Bi- curious. It is not complicated.
Honest use of these 3 would help avoid the sort of embarrassing experience just mentioned.
In essence I am saying that labels do matter when communicating with strangers. Very much indeed.
"
In your case I think the label would be irrelevant- unless the label was 'disrespectful idiot'.
If he knew you are straight it was totally wrong of him to do what he did. It's basically sexual assault. |
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"Sorry I disagree... I think they help when looking for playmates."
Dose it matter if, whoever you meet is straight or bi? Im not saying get rid of the lables, but if the boundaries of a meet are set then it shouldn't be any different then if a couple chooses not to involve kissing, as long as boundaries are kept there is no problem |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"My _iew is that, it really dont matter, if you guys meet a guy couple or whatever,then you are supposed to lay down limits.
As for the lables on here, there aint enough to describe everyone so most put straight, chances are you have already met someone (either socially or a play meet) that dosnt fit the label "straight "
End of the day if guide lines are set then you should be fine, plus I doubt any bi guy would just touch someone with out asking, and if they ask and its not your thing say no and carry on
You are in fact wrong with your assumption. A "straight" guy in a mmf with us a while back wrapped his lips around my cock without warning. I immediately lost my erection, Mrs J burst out laughing at the look of shock on my face and the guy left immediately in a huff.
It strikes me that only a few labels are in fact necessary -Gay,Bi and Bi- curious. It is not complicated.
Honest use of these 3 would help avoid the sort of embarrassing experience just mentioned.
In essence I am saying that labels do matter when communicating with strangers. Very much indeed.
In your case I think the label would be irrelevant- unless the label was 'disrespectful idiot'.
If he knew you are straight it was totally wrong of him to do what he did. It's basically sexual assault. "
I have coined a few similar labels; but everytime I use them, I get a forum ban  |
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"My _iew is that, it really dont matter, if you guys meet a guy couple or whatever,then you are supposed to lay down limits.
As for the lables on here, there aint enough to describe everyone so most put straight, chances are you have already met someone (either socially or a play meet) that dosnt fit the label "straight "
End of the day if guide lines are set then you should be fine, plus I doubt any bi guy would just touch someone with out asking, and if they ask and its not your thing say no and carry on
You are in fact wrong with your assumption. A "straight" guy in a mmf with us a while back wrapped his lips around my cock without warning. I immediately lost my erection, Mrs J burst out laughing at the look of shock on my face and the guy left immediately in a huff.
It strikes me that only a few labels are in fact necessary -Gay,Bi and Bi- curious. It is not complicated.
Honest use of these 3 would help avoid the sort of embarrassing experience just mentioned.
In essence I am saying that labels do matter when communicating with strangers. Very much indeed.
"
Sorry to hear that and sounds like you delt with it better then I would of, I personally would have reported him.
I have been with a few "straight " couples and been asked " do you mind" and a simple no and the fun continues |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My _iew is that, it really dont matter, if you guys meet a guy couple or whatever,then you are supposed to lay down limits.
As for the lables on here, there aint enough to describe everyone so most put straight, chances are you have already met someone (either socially or a play meet) that dosnt fit the label "straight "
End of the day if guide lines are set then you should be fine, plus I doubt any bi guy would just touch someone with out asking, and if they ask and its not your thing say no and carry on
You are in fact wrong with your assumption. A "straight" guy in a mmf with us a while back wrapped his lips around my cock without warning. I immediately lost my erection, Mrs J burst out laughing at the look of shock on my face and the guy left immediately in a huff.
It strikes me that only a few labels are in fact necessary -Gay,Bi and Bi- curious. It is not complicated.
Honest use of these 3 would help avoid the sort of embarrassing experience just mentioned.
In essence I am saying that labels do matter when communicating with strangers. Very much indeed.
In your case I think the label would be irrelevant- unless the label was 'disrespectful idiot'.
If he knew you are straight it was totally wrong of him to do what he did. It's basically sexual assault. "
We would not have met the guy if he had advertised himself as bi. It wouldn't interest me nor would it interest Mrs j.
He lied of course. To get the opportunity to meet.
This nonsense that it is only a label and doesn't matter allows people to justify it in their own minds.
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"My _iew is that, it really dont matter, if you guys meet a guy couple or whatever,then you are supposed to lay down limits.
As for the lables on here, there aint enough to describe everyone so most put straight, chances are you have already met someone (either socially or a play meet) that dosnt fit the label "straight "
End of the day if guide lines are set then you should be fine, plus I doubt any bi guy would just touch someone with out asking, and if they ask and its not your thing say no and carry on
You are in fact wrong with your assumption. A "straight" guy in a mmf with us a while back wrapped his lips around my cock without warning. I immediately lost my erection, Mrs J burst out laughing at the look of shock on my face and the guy left immediately in a huff.
It strikes me that only a few labels are in fact necessary -Gay,Bi and Bi- curious. It is not complicated.
Honest use of these 3 would help avoid the sort of embarrassing experience just mentioned.
In essence I am saying that labels do matter when communicating with strangers. Very much indeed.
In your case I think the label would be irrelevant- unless the label was 'disrespectful idiot'.
If he knew you are straight it was totally wrong of him to do what he did. It's basically sexual assault.
We would not have met the guy if he had advertised himself as bi. It wouldn't interest me nor would it interest Mrs j.
He lied of course. To get the opportunity to meet.
This nonsense that it is only a label and doesn't matter allows people to justify it in their own minds.
"
So, you used the 'straight' label
He used the 'straight' label
And he sucked your cock
What use was the label? |
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"My _iew is that, it really dont matter, if you guys meet a guy couple or whatever,then you are supposed to lay down limits.
As for the lables on here, there aint enough to describe everyone so most put straight, chances are you have already met someone (either socially or a play meet) that dosnt fit the label "straight "
End of the day if guide lines are set then you should be fine, plus I doubt any bi guy would just touch someone with out asking, and if they ask and its not your thing say no and carry on
You are in fact wrong with your assumption. A "straight" guy in a mmf with us a while back wrapped his lips around my cock without warning. I immediately lost my erection, Mrs J burst out laughing at the look of shock on my face and the guy left immediately in a huff.
It strikes me that only a few labels are in fact necessary -Gay,Bi and Bi- curious. It is not complicated.
Honest use of these 3 would help avoid the sort of embarrassing experience just mentioned.
In essence I am saying that labels do matter when communicating with strangers. Very much indeed.
In your case I think the label would be irrelevant- unless the label was 'disrespectful idiot'.
If he knew you are straight it was totally wrong of him to do what he did. It's basically sexual assault.
We would not have met the guy if he had advertised himself as bi. It wouldn't interest me nor would it interest Mrs j.
He lied of course. To get the opportunity to meet.
This nonsense that it is only a label and doesn't matter allows people to justify it in their own minds.
"
But why not if he was bi?
If he knew you was straight and respected that you would have had a good meet, wouldn't have you?
I know its obviously your preference and thats kl, but end of the day if all play straight dose it make a difference? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I believe it is important to establish ground rules and set expectations.
He lied.
The point is that I hear this comment about it being "only a label" and "if it feels right go for it".
Some idiots believe that bollox and think it justifies their selfish behaviour. |
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"I believe it is important to establish ground rules and set expectations.
He lied.
The point is that I hear this comment about it being "only a label" and "if it feels right go for it".
Some idiots believe that bollox and think it justifies their selfish behaviour. "
Yes he lied and in no way am I saying that was good thing, and respect to you for not puching him
But up until that point I take it you guys were having a good time? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My _iew is that, it really dont matter, if you guys meet a guy couple or whatever,then you are supposed to lay down limits.
As for the lables on here, there aint enough to describe everyone so most put straight, chances are you have already met someone (either socially or a play meet) that dosnt fit the label "straight "
End of the day if guide lines are set then you should be fine, plus I doubt any bi guy would just touch someone with out asking, and if they ask and its not your thing say no and carry on
You are in fact wrong with your assumption. A "straight" guy in a mmf with us a while back wrapped his lips around my cock without warning. I immediately lost my erection, Mrs J burst out laughing at the look of shock on my face and the guy left immediately in a huff.
It strikes me that only a few labels are in fact necessary -Gay,Bi and Bi- curious. It is not complicated.
Honest use of these 3 would help avoid the sort of embarrassing experience just mentioned.
In essence I am saying that labels do matter when communicating with strangers. Very much indeed.
"
I would say that if your straight your straight, this guy must have been bi curious and just didn't want to admit it, if you had known you might not have had the meet or you would have been ready for if that occasion occurred and be comfortable with it as it was something that might happen. Not an out of the blue set of lips around your member. The labels are a good way to at least know the basics of what people are interested in as long as they are honest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I believe it is important to establish ground rules and set expectations.
He lied.
The point is that I hear this comment about it being "only a label" and "if it feels right go for it".
Some idiots believe that bollox and think it justifies their selfish behaviour. "
As said above - the guy said he was straight, you're straight - yet he still tried to suck you off...
What's the point of labels if you understand a label to mean one thing but another person sees it meaning something else?
All you can do is set boundaries, because people lie/change/see themselves differently to how you might.
If people cross boundaries, that's a different matter altogether.
Respecting (or not respecting) others boundaries isn't defined by sexuality |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"I believe it is important to establish ground rules and set expectations.
He lied.
The point is that I hear this comment about it being "only a label" and "if it feels right go for it".
Some idiots believe that bollox and think it justifies their selfish behaviour. "
And...?
Using 'labels' and sticking to their 'true' meaning is hardly going to ever become an act of Parliament. It is hardly likely that the next bisexual guy who labels himself as straight will get 6 months custody or a £5,000 fine or both
Just set boundaries for each meeting and give up your obsession with labels. You now have proof that 'unregulated'' labels are useless |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
I know its obviously your preference and thats kl, but end of the day if all play straight dose it make a difference? "
I believe it does matter.
I am going to massively exaggerate here to make my point since a lot of what we do is about fantasy.
We have an astonishing 3some with a really sexy guy and leave with very fond memories.
How do you think those memories would alter if we subsequently discovered our guy actually preferred 8 year olds?
Like I say we are exaggerating to make the point.
It is not up to the other person to decide for us which labels are important and decide to lie. |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"I believe it is important to establish ground rules and set expectations.
He lied.
The point is that I hear this comment about it being "only a label" and "if it feels right go for it".
Some idiots believe that bollox and think it justifies their selfish behaviour.
Yes he lied and in no way am I saying that was good thing, and respect to you for not puching him
But up until that point I take it you guys were having a good time? "
Sucking cock is not a criminal offence. But punching someone is |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think gay, bi or straight is only a label as it doesn't define you as a person"
Of course it doesn't define a person. But it is pretty important when looking at a sexual partner. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think gay, bi or straight is only a label as it doesn't define you as a person
Of course it doesn't define a person. But it is pretty important when looking at a sexual partner."
Absolutely agree, massively important when deciding a sexual partner |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I find labels a terrible thing as they support discrimination and bigotry.
What would be helpful whe finding sexual partners is a good honest conversation about boundaries. I always ask someone what their 'no go' areas are.
Boundaries are important, communicating them is vital. You had a bad experience because of the person you were with - it wasn't because they were bi (any other bi men may have not sucked your cock), he was an idiot. |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"In the future, we won't need them. We'll all let go of our hang ups and just screw each other regardless.
Well this is my hope "
The future is already here for some of us 
But for others, whether they need them, can't live without them, would like to have, is all useless as there is no EU law which:
defines these kinds of labels
makes their use mandatory
punishes those who either do not use them or use them outside of their intended meaning |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Personally I find labels a terrible thing as they support discrimination and bigotry.
What would be helpful whe finding sexual partners is a good honest conversation about boundaries. I always ask someone what their 'no go' areas are.
Boundaries are important, communicating them is vital. You had a bad experience because of the person you were with - it wasn't because they were bi (any other bi men may have not sucked your cock), he was an idiot."
I agree about the idiot bit but labels if honestly used are a useful starting point when communicating with strangers.
I agree with the discrimination and bigotry worries but that is separate from honesty with potential sex partners. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They are pointless if the person lies and sadly many do for different reasons.
I have to say it's mainly single males who lie about their sexuality, that is a fact and not a go at genuine single males.
It's virtually impossible to tell if a male is completely straight or not if they're dishonest they will also be carefree.
People shouldn't need to lie as there really is something out there for all of us. Some people must get a kick out of duping strangers, I find that disturbing. |
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"
Sucking cock is not a criminal offence."
I would say that depends very much on the circumstances. As someone mentioned above, it could easily be construed as sexual assault if it went against the boundaries implied by the label under which he advertised himself.
I personally think labels are of varying use. For me, "straight" sums me up perfectly and is completely unambiguous - I am not interested in any form of sexual contact whatsoever with anyone who is, or has been, male. Obviously this doesn't reveal everything about my preferences, but it is a very good start. For other people things may be less clear cut. |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"
Sucking cock is not a criminal offence.
I would say that depends very much on the circumstances. As someone mentioned above, it could easily be construed as sexual assault if it went against the boundaries implied by the label under which he advertised himself.
I personally think labels are of varying use. For me, "straight" sums me up perfectly and is completely unambiguous - I am not interested in any form of sexual contact whatsoever with anyone who is, or has been, male. Obviously this doesn't reveal everything about my preferences, but it is a very good start. For other people things may be less clear cut."
Nope, you are wrong; there is no such label as "straight"; heterosexual, yes. But even then, nobody can by law be forced to remain heterosexual
But punching someone is a criminal offence; try it and let us all know what happened next |
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Sucking cock is not a criminal offence.
I would say that depends very much on the circumstances. As someone mentioned above, it could easily be construed as sexual assault if it went against the boundaries implied by the label under which he advertised himself.
I personally think labels are of varying use. For me, "straight" sums me up perfectly and is completely unambiguous - I am not interested in any form of sexual contact whatsoever with anyone who is, or has been, male. Obviously this doesn't reveal everything about my preferences, but it is a very good start. For other people things may be less clear cut.
Nope, you are wrong; there is no such label as "straight"; heterosexual, yes. But even then, nobody can by law be forced to remain heterosexual
But punching someone is a criminal offence; try it and let us all know what happened next"
I never for a moment suggested that punching someone wasn't an offence and I have no desire to test that thanks! Physical assault is also probably more "black and white" and easier to prove than a sexual offence.
However, sexual assault is also a criminal matter and whilst nobody can be "forced to remain heterosexual" (again, this bears no resemblance to what I said at all), consent IS required for each act on each person taking part. If it went to court, the use of any terms or labels and their accepted meanings in everyday parlance would be factored in to the discussion and used to come to a conclusion over whether consent had been given for the act in question, which in the situation the OP described it clearly wasn't.
Suggesting that what occurred here is acceptable is akin to saying that when a lady consents to "vanilla" sex she also agrees to any other sexual act my depraved brain might conjure up - good luck arguing that one! |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"
Sucking cock is not a criminal offence.
I would say that depends very much on the circumstances. As someone mentioned above, it could easily be construed as sexual assault if it went against the boundaries implied by the label under which he advertised himself.
I personally think labels are of varying use. For me, "straight" sums me up perfectly and is completely unambiguous - I am not interested in any form of sexual contact whatsoever with anyone who is, or has been, male. Obviously this doesn't reveal everything about my preferences, but it is a very good start. For other people things may be less clear cut.
Nope, you are wrong; there is no such label as "straight"; heterosexual, yes. But even then, nobody can by law be forced to remain heterosexual
But punching someone is a criminal offence; try it and let us all know what happened next
I never for a moment suggested that punching someone wasn't an offence and I have no desire to test that thanks! Physical assault is also probably more "black and white" and easier to prove than a sexual offence.
However, sexual assault is also a criminal matter and whilst nobody can be "forced to remain heterosexual" (again, this bears no resemblance to what I said at all), consent IS required for each act on each person taking part. If it went to court, the use of any terms or labels and their accepted meanings in everyday parlance would be factored in to the discussion and used to come to a conclusion over whether consent had been given for the act in question, which in the situation the OP described it clearly wasn't.
Suggesting that what occurred here is acceptable is akin to saying that when a lady consents to "vanilla" sex she also agrees to any other sexual act my depraved brain might conjure up - good luck arguing that one!"
Arm-chair barristers are great
Rape is rape; kinky stuff, whether it was agreed or not, once disputed always gets the 'kinky-doer' into trouble unless it can be proven that consent was granted, which is almost impossible to prove
In the OP's case, what they are indulging in is 'kinky-sex'
Me-Lord; I had invited the complainant to fuck my wife's brains out and stick his cock in her mouth. He fulfilled the contract but then proceeded to suck on my cock which was in close proximity ........
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I find labels a terrible thing as they support discrimination and bigotry.
What would be helpful whe finding sexual partners is a good honest conversation about boundaries. I always ask someone what their 'no go' areas are.
Boundaries are important, communicating them is vital. You had a bad experience because of the person you were with - it wasn't because they were bi (any other bi men may have not sucked your cock), he was an idiot.
I agree about the idiot bit but labels if honestly used are a useful starting point when communicating with strangers.
I agree with the discrimination and bigotry worries but that is separate from honesty with potential sex partners."
Actually I believe that due to discrimination and bigotry many people will be less than truthful with their labels to avoid unfair treatment. So not separate |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Personally I find labels a terrible thing as they support discrimination and bigotry.
What would be helpful whe finding sexual partners is a good honest conversation about boundaries. I always ask someone what their 'no go' areas are.
Boundaries are important, communicating them is vital. You had a bad experience because of the person you were with - it wasn't because they were bi (any other bi men may have not sucked your cock), he was an idiot.
I agree about the idiot bit but labels if honestly used are a useful starting point when communicating with strangers.
I agree with the discrimination and bigotry worries but that is separate from honesty with potential sex partners.
Actually I believe that due to discrimination and bigotry many people will be less than truthful with their labels to avoid unfair treatment. So not separate "
This is a sex site. A sex site for people of all sexual orientation and must involve labels.
Confusing preferences with discrimination does nobody any good whatsoever.
I would not accept anyone questioning my sexuality if I was applying for a job. The suspicion being it is due to bigotry and discrimination.
On this site it is an absolute necessity due to individual preferences.
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
I am happy to label myself bisexual and couldn't care less. The labels seem redundant in many cases as they don't necessarily reflect current sexual orientation.
Best to ask if you have an issue with potential playmates hoodwinking |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"Personally I find labels a terrible thing as they support discrimination and bigotry.
What would be helpful whe finding sexual partners is a good honest conversation about boundaries. I always ask someone what their 'no go' areas are.
Boundaries are important, communicating them is vital. You had a bad experience because of the person you were with - it wasn't because they were bi (any other bi men may have not sucked your cock), he was an idiot.
I agree about the idiot bit but labels if honestly used are a useful starting point when communicating with strangers.
I agree with the discrimination and bigotry worries but that is separate from honesty with potential sex partners.
Actually I believe that due to discrimination and bigotry many people will be less than truthful with their labels to avoid unfair treatment. So not separate
This is a sex site. A sex site for people of all sexual orientation and must involve labels.
Confusing preferences with discrimination does nobody any good whatsoever.
I would not accept anyone questioning my sexuality if I was applying for a job. The suspicion being it is due to bigotry and discrimination.
On this site it is an absolute necessity due to individual preferences.
"
It "must not involve" anything; which authority made it mandatory?
You and who else is going to 'police' this and which 'judiciary' is going to convict people of such 'offences'?
Will there be a 'court of labels' with a jury deciding on infringements? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Personally I find labels a terrible thing as they support discrimination and bigotry.
What would be helpful whe finding sexual partners is a good honest conversation about boundaries. I always ask someone what their 'no go' areas are.
Boundaries are important, communicating them is vital. You had a bad experience because of the person you were with - it wasn't because they were bi (any other bi men may have not sucked your cock), he was an idiot.
I agree about the idiot bit but labels if honestly used are a useful starting point when communicating with strangers.
I agree with the discrimination and bigotry worries but that is separate from honesty with potential sex partners.
Actually I believe that due to discrimination and bigotry many people will be less than truthful with their labels to avoid unfair treatment. So not separate
This is a sex site. A sex site for people of all sexual orientation and must involve labels.
Confusing preferences with discrimination does nobody any good whatsoever.
I would not accept anyone questioning my sexuality if I was applying for a job. The suspicion being it is due to bigotry and discrimination.
On this site it is an absolute necessity due to individual preferences.
It "must not involve" anything; which authority made it mandatory?
You and who else is going to 'police' this and which 'judiciary' is going to convict people of such 'offences'?
Will there be a 'court of labels' with a jury deciding on infringements?"
I am struggling to see what exactly you are suggesting here. Is it we are not to be allowed to ask or display sexual preferences on a swingers site?
Or on the other hand you feel that lying and deception about them should not be condemned?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc"
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
|
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The 'label' choices are as basic as they can be - straight/bicurious/bisexual/straight/TVts
There is quite a demand for the TV and TS to be split.
I think that there are so many interpretations of what sexuality someone is that a label for each possible variation might be a bit unwieldy - far better to say, for example, 'bisexual' and then define your parameters and understanding of that in your profile. |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"Personally I find labels a terrible thing as they support discrimination and bigotry.
What would be helpful whe finding sexual partners is a good honest conversation about boundaries. I always ask someone what their 'no go' areas are.
Boundaries are important, communicating them is vital. You had a bad experience because of the person you were with - it wasn't because they were bi (any other bi men may have not sucked your cock), he was an idiot.
I agree about the idiot bit but labels if honestly used are a useful starting point when communicating with strangers.
I agree with the discrimination and bigotry worries but that is separate from honesty with potential sex partners.
Actually I believe that due to discrimination and bigotry many people will be less than truthful with their labels to avoid unfair treatment. So not separate
This is a sex site. A sex site for people of all sexual orientation and must involve labels.
Confusing preferences with discrimination does nobody any good whatsoever.
I would not accept anyone questioning my sexuality if I was applying for a job. The suspicion being it is due to bigotry and discrimination.
On this site it is an absolute necessity due to individual preferences.
It "must not involve" anything; which authority made it mandatory?
You and who else is going to 'police' this and which 'judiciary' is going to convict people of such 'offences'?
Will there be a 'court of labels' with a jury deciding on infringements?
I am struggling to see what exactly you are suggesting here. Is it we are not to be allowed to ask or display sexual preferences on a swingers site?
Or on the other hand you feel that lying and deception about them should not be condemned?
"
Read my earlier comment
It has already been proven to you that not only do people lie about their sexuality but also that each person's definitions of labels is different. There isn't any ISO of these kinds of labels and nor is there a European Court working overtime convicting culprits
What does bi-curious mean to you? It it the same as bisexual? Yes, no? Which is a 'higher degree' of bisexuality? And I may well not agree with your defination as just as you think you are correct, I too think that I am correct
You might think that only three labels are necessary; but you are not some kind of authority to decide that for everyone else too
You are too hung up on labels. It is best to discuss your parameters with each person you want to meet. Maybe they will then decide that they do not want to meet you. But once everyone has agreed on which sexual acts are acceptable to all and which aren't, you can all have fun |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
"
Exactly
And who knows whether you are actually 60 but are claiming to be 53. It is not as if you will be asked to produce your birth certificate and if proven that you are well over 53, I will run to the local constabulary and implore that a crime report be opened
It is whatever age you appear to be that will be accepted |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Exactly
And who knows whether you are actually 60 but are claiming to be 53. It is not as if you will be asked to produce your birth certificate and if proven that you are well over 53, I will run to the local constabulary and implore that a crime report be opened
It is whatever age you appear to be that will be accepted"
I must appear rather odd given your understanding of the world. I am actually straight and actually 53.
It is only on "Planet Fab" that the words Bi/Bi curious and Straight cause any confusion.
|
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Exactly
And who knows whether you are actually 60 but are claiming to be 53. It is not as if you will be asked to produce your birth certificate and if proven that you are well over 53, I will run to the local constabulary and implore that a crime report be opened
It is whatever age you appear to be that will be accepted
I must appear rather odd given your understanding of the world. I am actually straight and actually 53.
It is only on "Planet Fab" that the words Bi/Bi curious and Straight cause any confusion.
"
If you say so
If I wasn't on FabS I would see you as a couple involved in depraved and kinky sex
Lets face it, who else, in the mainstream world gets men to come over and have full on sex with his wife and not only watches, but participates. So lets not get into where the confusion lies and jump from 'planet to planet' seeking refuge in whichever suits best |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
"
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion)"
The brain is the most erogeonous part of the body. Fantasy is one of the most important parts of sex and it is facile to suggest that because we all don't fantasise about having gay sex we are being discriminatory.
Be serious. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
Just ask them if they have sucked cock, going to suck cock or have had theirs sucked by someone with a cock.
And have they had it up a anus or one in theirs.
They may still lie..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion)
The brain is the most erogeonous part of the body. Fantasy is one of the most important parts of sex and it is facile to suggest that because we all don't fantasise about having gay sex we are being discriminatory.
Be serious."
Now you're making insinuations to suit your agenda. I said no such thing.
Bi people can enjoy hetro sex - therefore gay sex has little to do with this.
To not meet someone for hetro fun as they are bi is discriminatory |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"Just ask them if they have sucked cock, going to suck cock or have had theirs sucked by someone with a cock.
And have they had it up a anus or one in theirs.
They may still lie....."
This above is is an incomplete declaration. This is better:
Have they sucked a cock or have intentions of sucking a cock or have ever thought about sucking a cock
Have they had their cock sucked or have intentions of having their cock sucked or thought about having their cock sucked by someone who has a cock or had a cock or will have a cock
I think that the above is ready to be drafted by a paralegal now
Oh, yeah, and they still might lie |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion)
The brain is the most erogeonous part of the body. Fantasy is one of the most important parts of sex and it is facile to suggest that because we all don't fantasise about having gay sex we are being discriminatory.
Be serious.
Now you're making insinuations to suit your agenda. I said no such thing.
Bi people can enjoy hetro sex - therefore gay sex has little to do with this.
To not meet someone for hetro fun as they are bi is discriminatory "
Mrs J likes to feel that she is the centre of attention in a mmf. That both guys are totally crazy about her.
If we know that one of the guys is bi then that devalues the fantasy for her. Preference or discrimination?
Once again be serious and use your head before casting around accusations of discrimination. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Misleading or dishonest labelling is arrogant m insulting and offensive.... because it basically suggests the person who provided it thinks anyone who reads it will be stupid enough to believe it,,,  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I believe it is important to establish ground rules and set expectations.
He lied.
The point is that I hear this comment about it being "only a label" and "if it feels right go for it".
Some idiots believe that bollox and think it justifies their selfish behaviour.
As said above - the guy said he was straight, you're straight - yet he still tried to suck you off...
What's the point of labels if you understand a label to mean one thing but another person sees it meaning something else?
All you can do is set boundaries, because people lie/change/see themselves differently to how you might.
If people cross boundaries, that's a different matter altogether.
Respecting (or not respecting) others boundaries isn't defined by sexuality"
|
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"Just ask them if they have sucked cock, going to suck cock or have had theirs sucked by someone with a cock.
And have they had it up a anus or one in theirs.
They may still lie.....
This above is is an incomplete declaration. This is better:
Have they sucked a cock or have intentions of sucking a cock or have ever thought about sucking a cock
Have they had their cock sucked or have intentions of having their cock sucked or thought about having their cock sucked by someone who has a cock or had a cock or will have a cock
I think that the above is ready to be drafted by a paralegal now
Oh, yeah, and they still might lie "
agree, you cover it better |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
If a woman was lying on a beach and a man suddenly pulled her bikini bottom to one side and stuck his face in her pussy, what would people say?
A straight man should surely be able to expect that another straight man wouldn't suck his cock.
The OP shouldn't have to question every straight guy they meet about whether he will suck his cock.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Simply that is our experience. Nothing scientific."
Also experience from reading the forum posts....!
I put straight on my profile for a reason...and it isn't because I'm bi, gay or even curious. It is there because it is what I am...same as the OP correctly states...it lets people know what to expect! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion)
The brain is the most erogeonous part of the body. Fantasy is one of the most important parts of sex and it is facile to suggest that because we all don't fantasise about having gay sex we are being discriminatory.
Be serious.
Now you're making insinuations to suit your agenda. I said no such thing.
Bi people can enjoy hetro sex - therefore gay sex has little to do with this.
To not meet someone for hetro fun as they are bi is discriminatory
Mrs J likes to feel that she is the centre of attention in a mmf. That both guys are totally crazy about her.
If we know that one of the guys is bi then that devalues the fantasy for her. Preference or discrimination?
Once again be serious and use your head before casting around accusations of discrimination."
I am being serious, my husband and I are in a heterosexual marriage. What you're suggesting is that because he is situationally bi he isn't 100% enjoying me when we have sex, nor I him since I am bi??
Simply you are applying your own stereotypes based on your feelings about people who aren't 100% hetro.
The fact that you can't provide a sensible conversation on the matter and have resorted to telling me to be sensible tells me everything I need to know.
Enjoy your labels - I can assure you they will get you know where |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion)
The brain is the most erogeonous part of the body. Fantasy is one of the most important parts of sex and it is facile to suggest that because we all don't fantasise about having gay sex we are being discriminatory.
Be serious.
Now you're making insinuations to suit your agenda. I said no such thing.
Bi people can enjoy hetro sex - therefore gay sex has little to do with this.
To not meet someone for hetro fun as they are bi is discriminatory
Mrs J likes to feel that she is the centre of attention in a mmf. That both guys are totally crazy about her.
If we know that one of the guys is bi then that devalues the fantasy for her. Preference or discrimination?
Once again be serious and use your head before casting around accusations of discrimination.
I am being serious, my husband and I are in a heterosexual marriage. What you're suggesting is that because he is situationally bi he isn't 100% enjoying me when we have sex, nor I him since I am bi??
Simply you are applying your own stereotypes based on your feelings about people who aren't 100% hetro.
The fact that you can't provide a sensible conversation on the matter and have resorted to telling me to be sensible tells me everything I need to know.
Enjoy your labels - I can assure you they will get you know where"
Why does he have to explain their preferences? They don't want to meet bi guys, it's irrelevant why not. If they don't want to meet women or blondes or 20 year olds or people under 6ft tall, that is entirely up to them.
It's sex. There is no discrimination. |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion)
The brain is the most erogeonous part of the body. Fantasy is one of the most important parts of sex and it is facile to suggest that because we all don't fantasise about having gay sex we are being discriminatory.
Be serious.
Now you're making insinuations to suit your agenda. I said no such thing.
Bi people can enjoy hetro sex - therefore gay sex has little to do with this.
To not meet someone for hetro fun as they are bi is discriminatory
Mrs J likes to feel that she is the centre of attention in a mmf. That both guys are totally crazy about her.
If we know that one of the guys is bi then that devalues the fantasy for her. Preference or discrimination?
Once again be serious and use your head before casting around accusations of discrimination.
I am being serious, my husband and I are in a heterosexual marriage. What you're suggesting is that because he is situationally bi he isn't 100% enjoying me when we have sex, nor I him since I am bi??
Simply you are applying your own stereotypes based on your feelings about people who aren't 100% hetro.
The fact that you can't provide a sensible conversation on the matter and have resorted to telling me to be sensible tells me everything I need to know.
Enjoy your labels - I can assure you they will get you know where
Why does he have to explain their preferences? They don't want to meet bi guys, it's irrelevant why not. If they don't want to meet women or blondes or 20 year olds or people under 6ft tall, that is entirely up to them.
It's sex. There is no discrimination. "
They don't have to explain anything; just as nobody else has to tell them whether they are bi-curious, bi-furious, bisexual, straight, heterosexual, all out gay, etc, etc, etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion)
The brain is the most erogeonous part of the body. Fantasy is one of the most important parts of sex and it is facile to suggest that because we all don't fantasise about having gay sex we are being discriminatory.
Be serious.
Now you're making insinuations to suit your agenda. I said no such thing.
Bi people can enjoy hetro sex - therefore gay sex has little to do with this.
To not meet someone for hetro fun as they are bi is discriminatory
Mrs J likes to feel that she is the centre of attention in a mmf. That both guys are totally crazy about her.
If we know that one of the guys is bi then that devalues the fantasy for her. Preference or discrimination?
Once again be serious and use your head before casting around accusations of discrimination.
I am being serious, my husband and I are in a heterosexual marriage. What you're suggesting is that because he is situationally bi he isn't 100% enjoying me when we have sex, nor I him since I am bi??
Simply you are applying your own stereotypes based on your feelings about people who aren't 100% hetro.
The fact that you can't provide a sensible conversation on the matter and have resorted to telling me to be sensible tells me everything I need to know.
Enjoy your labels - I can assure you they will get you know where
Why does he have to explain their preferences? They don't want to meet bi guys, it's irrelevant why not. If they don't want to meet women or blondes or 20 year olds or people under 6ft tall, that is entirely up to them.
It's sex. There is no discrimination.
They don't have to explain anything; just as nobody else has to tell them whether they are bi-curious, bi-furious, bisexual, straight, heterosexual, all out gay, etc, etc, etc"
Bi-furious!! I love it!
(Sorry if that was a typo but it made me snort.) |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion)
The brain is the most erogeonous part of the body. Fantasy is one of the most important parts of sex and it is facile to suggest that because we all don't fantasise about having gay sex we are being discriminatory.
Be serious.
Now you're making insinuations to suit your agenda. I said no such thing.
Bi people can enjoy hetro sex - therefore gay sex has little to do with this.
To not meet someone for hetro fun as they are bi is discriminatory
Mrs J likes to feel that she is the centre of attention in a mmf. That both guys are totally crazy about her.
If we know that one of the guys is bi then that devalues the fantasy for her. Preference or discrimination?
Once again be serious and use your head before casting around accusations of discrimination.
I am being serious, my husband and I are in a heterosexual marriage. What you're suggesting is that because he is situationally bi he isn't 100% enjoying me when we have sex, nor I him since I am bi??
Simply you are applying your own stereotypes based on your feelings about people who aren't 100% hetro.
The fact that you can't provide a sensible conversation on the matter and have resorted to telling me to be sensible tells me everything I need to know.
Enjoy your labels - I can assure you they will get you know where
Why does he have to explain their preferences? They don't want to meet bi guys, it's irrelevant why not. If they don't want to meet women or blondes or 20 year olds or people under 6ft tall, that is entirely up to them.
It's sex. There is no discrimination.
They don't have to explain anything; just as nobody else has to tell them whether they are bi-curious, bi-furious, bisexual, straight, heterosexual, all out gay, etc, etc, etc
Bi-furious!! I love it!
(Sorry if that was a typo but it made me snort.)"
Its when a woman rips off your panties with her teeth in an elevator ride to the 10th floor |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion)
The brain is the most erogeonous part of the body. Fantasy is one of the most important parts of sex and it is facile to suggest that because we all don't fantasise about having gay sex we are being discriminatory.
Be serious.
Now you're making insinuations to suit your agenda. I said no such thing.
Bi people can enjoy hetro sex - therefore gay sex has little to do with this.
To not meet someone for hetro fun as they are bi is discriminatory
Mrs J likes to feel that she is the centre of attention in a mmf. That both guys are totally crazy about her.
If we know that one of the guys is bi then that devalues the fantasy for her. Preference or discrimination?
Once again be serious and use your head before casting around accusations of discrimination.
I am being serious, my husband and I are in a heterosexual marriage. What you're suggesting is that because he is situationally bi he isn't 100% enjoying me when we have sex, nor I him since I am bi??
Simply you are applying your own stereotypes based on your feelings about people who aren't 100% hetro.
The fact that you can't provide a sensible conversation on the matter and have resorted to telling me to be sensible tells me everything I need to know.
Enjoy your labels - I can assure you they will get you know where
Why does he have to explain their preferences? They don't want to meet bi guys, it's irrelevant why not. If they don't want to meet women or blondes or 20 year olds or people under 6ft tall, that is entirely up to them.
It's sex. There is no discrimination.
They don't have to explain anything; just as nobody else has to tell them whether they are bi-curious, bi-furious, bisexual, straight, heterosexual, all out gay, etc, etc, etc
Bi-furious!! I love it!
(Sorry if that was a typo but it made me snort.)
Its when a woman rips off your panties with her teeth in an elevator ride to the 10th floor "
*Faints in excitement*
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Personally, it is my experience on fab that those most concerned with labels are those who are looking to avoid.
And I never levelled my statement about discrimination at you directly, it is a common 'preference' on here that people won't meet bi men (bi women are fine). Sexual play is not binary and sexual orientation and preferences can be fluid and situationally dependent. I personally don't think avoiding people because of their sexuality is anything other than discriminatory when that person is capable of playing within boundaries.
You cannot 'see' someone's sexuality - therefore, to me, blanket bans on that basis cannot be reasoned away with drawing similarities to appearance / race etc
My preferences are another persons discrimination. I am 53 years old but you apparently discriminate against anyone over 50.
Perhaps if I lied and said I was 49 after all it is only another label.
Yes, but my point is you can SEE age you can't SEE sexuality. Therefore one is a preference the other is discrimination (as it has no bearing on whether you find someone attractive, unless you have a mental aversion)
The brain is the most erogeonous part of the body. Fantasy is one of the most important parts of sex and it is facile to suggest that because we all don't fantasise about having gay sex we are being discriminatory.
Be serious.
Now you're making insinuations to suit your agenda. I said no such thing.
Bi people can enjoy hetro sex - therefore gay sex has little to do with this.
To not meet someone for hetro fun as they are bi is discriminatory
Mrs J likes to feel that she is the centre of attention in a mmf. That both guys are totally crazy about her.
If we know that one of the guys is bi then that devalues the fantasy for her. Preference or discrimination?
Once again be serious and use your head before casting around accusations of discrimination.
I am being serious, my husband and I are in a heterosexual marriage. What you're suggesting is that because he is situationally bi he isn't 100% enjoying me when we have sex, nor I him since I am bi??
Simply you are applying your own stereotypes based on your feelings about people who aren't 100% hetro.
The fact that you can't provide a sensible conversation on the matter and have resorted to telling me to be sensible tells me everything I need to know.
Enjoy your labels - I can assure you they will get you know where"
Where exactly did I suggest anything about your sex life??
I was talking about our own. So don't take the hump just because I think your argument was shallow. And don't be surprised when you suggest we are discriminating and we get irritated.
As for us getting known for our labels then I am perfectly happy. It is all in our profile and is all true. Unlike some.
We don't need to lie or spout delusional nonsense to get a meet. |
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"I keep coming across people saying these types of labels are pointless. Just go with what feels right they say.
What is the wider _iew on this?
Our _iew is that they are a vital tool to let strangers know what they can expect from us and how we expect them to behave in return. Being a straight guy other guys will know they cannot expect a blowjob from me or vice versa.
Interestingly we notice that those (mainly guys) who suggest that this type of label is pointless are usually gay/bi guys with straight profiles.
Never straight guys with fake gay profiles.
I will put my body armour on now and await the replies. "
If they have 'straight' profiles, how do you know they are bi or gay? crystal ball, or what.?? |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"I keep coming across people saying these types of labels are pointless. Just go with what feels right they say.
What is the wider _iew on this?
Our _iew is that they are a vital tool to let strangers know what they can expect from us and how we expect them to behave in return. Being a straight guy other guys will know they cannot expect a blowjob from me or vice versa.
Interestingly we notice that those (mainly guys) who suggest that this type of label is pointless are usually gay/bi guys with straight profiles.
Never straight guys with fake gay profiles.
I will put my body armour on now and await the replies. If they have 'straight' profiles, how do you know they are bi or gay? crystal ball, or what.??"
A keen sense of smell
Some are capable from 12 parsec |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Simply that is our experience. Nothing scientific.Oh, just a vague stab in the dark then.lol."
Give it a break. We are not new to the swinging life.
Nor are our observations about "straight" guys looking for same sex experiences a total revelation. The site is chock a block full of similar observations. |
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Hmmmm Labels, of course we need them and of course they can be abused.....
For instance if a straight guy mails me, he may be bi- curious so testing the waters so to speak, I would not class him as bisexual at that stage....
He may just try once for the experience ...I bet lots of straight girls have had the sneaky snog without being drawn to the lifestyle of bisexuality or becoming lesbians ......
You can only have a label when you have really chosen a certain lifestyle...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think labels are rubbish, sexually I'm absolutely bisexual or probably just more sexual, I have no preference about who i fuck, female, male, no gender, TV, TS, gay, lesbian, anything goes.
However I know in my heart I could probably only date a man... |
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I think all this thread proves is that, as we often conclude, everyone is different. The single label of "straight" suits me perfectly - I've never had the slightest desire or even curiosity regarding doing anything sexual with a guy and I've no reason to suspect that will ever change. All this discussion of so-called straight guys being willing to dabble with other men as a second choice is a bit of a revelation to me tbh!
In contrast, the poster above me for example (not picking on her for any reason other than hers is the latest post I've read) is clearly far more complex sexually and as she says, simple labels wouldn't cover what she has described about herself |
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