FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Here is one for us all to chew over
Here is one for us all to chew over
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In terms of this site, if we get a message and say in response" ok we'll think about this and get back to you" and then get loads of messages along the lines of "so what do you think" "will you meet me now" etc etc that comes over as pushy. In the same vein, if we do agree a meet and then get a list of what the person intends to do to Kitty, that comes across as pushy too. We had the latter off the M half of a couple , so it's not just guys. That's my opinion, for what it's worth |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Is this the wrong way to open drawers?
Seriously, in fab context, it's when someone continues to try when the person they're trying with has said no, or is not responding to messages in a fashion that does not give rise to a response. |
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Not taking a polite no for an answer.
Insisting on asking over and over again whether I will play after the social. When I have said we will see if we fancy each other.
Sending another message complaining I've not replied, before I've had time to reply to the last.
Telling me they will do this and that to me and defo make me squirt etc. when we've not even met. |
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"Seriously, in fab context, it's when someone continues to try when the person they're trying with has said no, or is not responding to messages in a fashion that does not give rise to a response."
This is a much better and more succinct way to put it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i'd say someone is being pushy when they continue to ask questions but never listen to the answers, asks to meet when its been stated that your not meeting....trying to make you do something before you are ready, when someone pushes their own agenda to the deprement of the other |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Couldn't put it better minx hun and in a club situation pawing at me n hovering and lurking where ever I go including blocking my way out of the loo so you can cop a feel fukin infuriates me NO TY MEANS JUST THAT push it n you will get a FUK RIGHT OFF n so what if offends ya delicate sensibilities ya twonk |
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"Is this the wrong way to open drawers?
Seriously, in fab context, it's when someone continues to try when the person they're trying with has said no, or is not responding to messages in a fashion that does not give rise to a response."
That's a really good answer.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Pushy means they don't respect my limits, which could be those i've shown on my profile or could be if they don't listen to what i said and continue as if i don't matter and what i said doesn't matter. |
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"This one may not be as black and white as it sounds. What's the difference between being pushy and encouraging someone who is unsure?"
One is pushing against someone's will and the other is encouraging someone who has the will I'd say. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This one may not be as black and white as it sounds. What's the difference between being pushy and encouraging someone who is unsure?
One is pushing against someone's will and the other is encouraging someone who has the will I'd say."
Pretty damned accurate assessment |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This one may not be as black and white as it sounds. What's the difference between being pushy and encouraging someone who is unsure?"
There isn't to me.
Call it encouraging, coersion, manipulation, grooming or whatever you want to. It's similar to being pushy , but less obvious, and is still trying to get someone to do what you want, or what you think is the best option for them. Trying to improve someone is a good thing for them, if they want that.
If someone has choices then leave them to decide what they want and when they want.
Obviously some people (very young children for example) aren't always capable of making safe decisions for themselves so they might need to be pushed into making better choices or even have their choices taken away and be forced to do certain things for their own safety, but as they grow up it gets to a point where most people are able to make their own informed choices and should be allowed to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was accused of being something like this. I had a FBuddy who just went off me but was not honest and did not say to me when this happened. I kept visiting for social visits but I kept flirting and seducing for a few months. I ended up feeling like Arkwright in the original Open All Hours chasing the sexy nurse. I dont take rejection well but having the lack of honesty aswell meant I had to duck and run. Next time I'm not hanging about for so long. If it cools then I'm outahere... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Seriously, in fab context, it's when someone continues to try when the person they're trying with has said no, or is not responding to messages in a fashion that does not give rise to a response.
This is a much better and more succinct way to put it "
Totally agree ... This happens all the time and it puts me off. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I use 'pushy' in my profile. A definite turn off. The best definition I found was 'behaving in an ?unpleasant way by ?trying too much to get something or to make someone do something'.
Not respecting boundaries and choices is very unattractive. |
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