FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Any single men ever gets messaged first?
Any single men ever gets messaged first?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hi, I have never had anyone either a single girls or couple ever message me first. It is always me having to message them first.
So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol. |
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I once in a while get messaged first by a woman or couple usually their verified etc...
for the most part it is positive messages but some times I have come across those who are all nice and polite then for no reason just block me when I didn't say or do anything wrong etc..
like the other night a verified local couple messaged me first and we spoke very briefly then they just decided to block me?
rude tossers with no manners really why bother messaging me in the first place then?  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I message men first if I like the look of someone. Not all men seem to like it as it's seen as predatory and unladylike."
I wouldnt mind you messaging me first.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do yes. Not regularly, but often enough to make me smile.
They aren't always suitable or "for me"...but the fact they bothered does put a spring in my step.  "
It's because you're so bloody nice to talk to |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Never. Ladies get that many messages they just search throu the garbage and pick out the best. So unless there inbox aint doing it for them why would they need to send
Also op what lady would message a without a profile picturw when theres 1000s with on here |
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and the funny part was the verified local couple who yesterday messaged me first then blocked me soon after sent me a friend invite too even though I had never previously interacted with them in the past..
weird fuckers  |
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"I do yes. Not regularly, but often enough to make me smile.
They aren't always suitable or "for me"...but the fact they bothered does put a spring in my step.
It's because you're so bloody nice to talk to "
Yes, that is the first thing notice about me from my profile  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do yes. Not regularly, but often enough to make me smile.
They aren't always suitable or "for me"...but the fact they bothered does put a spring in my step.
It's because you're so bloody nice to talk to
Yes, that is the first thing notice about me from my profile "
Ok, never mind. I take it back. |
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"Hi, I have never had anyone either a single girls or couple ever message me first. It is always me having to message them first.
So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol."
Yes |
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"Never. Ladies get that many messages they just search throu the garbage and pick out the best. So unless there inbox aint doing it for them why would they need to send"
I used to rely on my inbox but a fab friend said why wait and only see the idiots who message you. Go out and find men yourself.
I find that tricky still but if I see a really nice male profile I may send a message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yep, a few times from couples, twice it wasn't my cup of tea, and once a couple I had been perving on for a while messaged me, but the meet date was 2 weeks after and I was away... Just my luck 
Never once from a single fem though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"and the funny part was the verified local couple who yesterday messaged me first then blocked me soon after sent me a friend invite too even though I had never previously interacted with them in the past..
weird fuckers "
Why let it bother you? Just forget it and move on. Lifes too short to be getting angry with people on fab. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do yes. Not regularly, but often enough to make me smile.
They aren't always suitable or "for me"...but the fact they bothered does put a spring in my step. "
I'd message you first too. Profile makes me laugh, lots of pics and no crude comments. Happy days!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never. Ladies get that many messages they just search throu the garbage and pick out the best. So unless there inbox aint doing it for them why would they need to send
I used to rely on my inbox but a fab friend said why wait and only see the idiots who message you. Go out and find men yourself.
I find that tricky still but if I see a really nice male profile I may send a message."
Think ill stop sending messages if thats what the ladies of fab think about guys sending messages |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't usually message first anymore. The forums are a pleasurable place to interact and the rest is mostly a game to me, otherwise I'd go insane.... If I'm not already |
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"and the funny part was the verified local couple who yesterday messaged me first then blocked me soon after sent me a friend invite too even though I had never previously interacted with them in the past"
It's not weird. If you decide you don't want to meet a man, eve if you tell him nicely, he will message you again....
So it's often easier to block. |
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"and the funny part was the verified local couple who yesterday messaged me first then blocked me soon after sent me a friend invite too even though I had never previously interacted with them in the past..
weird fuckers
Why let it bother you? Just forget it and move on. Lifes too short to be getting angry with people on fab."
well lets see, usually I don't as I never do message women/couples off here on my time being here on this site...
why is that you ask? i'll tell you why they all get enough messages as is so best option is just leaving em be as their not going to be interested in the first place.
in my own experience on here when they approach me first they tend to be more polite/relaxed usually I meet them in the chat room's etc and so far most of them I keep in touch and have good conversation with..
now however if on the rare occasion some one bothers to message me first at least make an effort and if their not interested or change their mind at some point I won't bother them then i'll leave em be but to just fuck me off like that with no reason its like no wonder you get so much shit then.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The closest I've come was getting a wink from a single lady, I messaged her, we exchanged a few messages, added each other as friends, she suggested a social, I agreed, asked when...
And I've heard nothing for 6 weeks
Hey ho, onwards and upwards, I'll focus on the friends I've already got and see  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Usually happens when the moon is blue and there is a pig flying by my bedroom window........."
Hmmm, typo now corrected...maybe my bad spelling puts the ladies off
This is not a cue to give me a list of other reasons that the ladies are put off |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah, I get a few a week normally, No one that's tempted me yet though 
And yet...still not verified "
Haha
Verifications mean nothing, believe it or not you can get plenty of sex elsewhere other than fabs! Or at least you should be able to!
Like it says on my profile I'm here for what I don't typically get in my day to day life.
So why would I want any old verifications ?
I'm quite happy using the forum for entertainment, I'm not overly fussed about meeting unless it's something or someone special.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep but they're usually only after my ice cream.
But it's OK my mummy warned me about girls like that so they don't fool me"
I'm not after your ice cream... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi, I have never had anyone either a single girls or couple ever message me first. It is always me having to message them first.
So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol."
Women msg a single man first....
No never as on this site they all seem to want to be chased!!
And love a man to contact them and woo... Them with their words typed on a keyboard..
Which I do find odd as if women and couple took time to email more men .. (If that's what they want) it would cut down the amount of pestering the apparently desperate men all trying to get some one to notice them!!! |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"Hi, I have never had anyone either a single girls or couple ever message me first. It is always me having to message them first.
So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol.
Yes "
fibber! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi, I have never had anyone either a single girls or couple ever message me first. It is always me having to message them first.
So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol.
Women msg a single man first....
No never as on this site they all seem to want to be chased!!
And love a man to contact them and woo... Them with their words typed on a keyboard..
Which I do find odd as if women and couple took time to email more men .. (If that's what they want) it would cut down the amount of pestering the apparently desperate men all trying to get some one to notice them!!!"
Bullshit!  |
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on a more positive note in my time I have been messaged by some lovely ladies which is nice
also been messaged a bit by bi guys when I go on webcam sometimes but I take it as a compliment and still talk with them anyway, also some good looking TV's/TS Ladies too.....had I swung that way I probably could have had 2 or 3 meets by now.. |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"Yeah, I get a few a week normally, No one that's tempted me yet though
And yet...still not verified
Haha
Verifications mean nothing, believe it or not you can get plenty of sex elsewhere other than fabs! Or at least you should be able to!
Like it says on my profile I'm here for what I don't typically get in my day to day life.
So why would I want any old verifications ?
I'm quite happy using the forum for entertainment, I'm not overly fussed about meeting unless it's something or someone special.
"
I'm pretty sick of all the verification "drama" too, so I don't bother displaying any other than ones that make me laugh and/or are from social meets. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi, I have never had anyone either a single girls or couple ever message me first. It is always me having to message them first.
So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol."
I get a few |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Had the occassional first message..but sometimes because I have posted on a forum and they then had more to say...or they seen a recent pic I have uploaded. Couples more than single women. Perhaps if women get full mailboxes of people they don't think are right maybe they should be hunting and mailing first...now that would be more fun....liberation for women...yeah...! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've started to message guys more now after my situation changed recently. It's a bit of a chore though tbh. Where do all the classy guys hide??  "
Newcastle |
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I've had quite a few women messaging me over the last few months. More than ever in fact. Ever since I've been hanging around the forums really. Over time women will see what you're like from your forum posts and if they like what they see they'll message you.
I'm currently not sending out any messages, as I found it all pretty hopeless. I let the ladies message me now if they want to. It doesn't happen too often but it beats sending out a hundred messages and having them all unread or deleted. You know if a woman messages you that they are interested in you one way or another. |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
I often message single men first when I am looking.
Recently, I have contacted 15 single guys - 7 of whom were not really single, 2 had lied on their profile, one said he wasn't interested, and 4 I am chatting to now, and 1 deleted unread...
Its tough going. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi, I have never had anyone either a single girls or couple ever message me first. It is always me having to message them first.
So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol."
Have you tried googly eyes on your penis? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a couple of times and two of the messages are leading to meets when our schedules match up.
The rest are either too far away or wanted to meet then and there or in the case of one couple it was to send a message saying that my profile offends them and when I asked why they blocked me.
There are some really strange people out there you know |
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By *olarfoxMan
over a year ago
North Cambs |
"Hi, I have never had anyone either a single girls or couple ever message me first. It is always me having to message them first.
So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol."
I regularly get messages from both single girls and couples on here, in fact, I reckon about my meets are initiated that way |
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No i am in the same league as you mate and never ever got a first message sent to me.
I find to if i dont start chatting to some one first then they wont ever make the first move in chatting to me.
Its seems to be always the guys that got to make the first move. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It happens fairly regularly. I can only assume ladies and couples around my area are delightfully forward, which I adore, if they take the time to message me first then they are usually serious about swinging and not just lurkers hanging about the site.
Sometimes these messages lead to meets, sometimes not, but usually I have pleasant conversations with them at the very least.
To be honest if I were a single lady on here I'd probably turn huntress, means you'd have more of a contact ratio with those who entice you rather than the idiots.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi, I have never had anyone either a single girls or couple ever message me first. It is always me having to message them first.
So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol."
Never single woman, just bi couples and lots and lots of gays |
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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago
Chippenham Malmesbury area |
All the time, and it's amazing just how many of them haven't even read my profile properly and even worse that some send one line messages saying "want a fuck" (or similar).
I'm thinking of rewriting my profile (in capitals) stating what is and isn't acceptable and having my status as "WTF - READ MY BLOODY PROFILE" |
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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago
Chippenham Malmesbury area |
"The irony in the fact that on this thread, there is a couple - more than a couple - of men that ~I~ messaged first..."
Humph, I take it that my message from you must've got lost in the Internet somewhere? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Once or twice but i wouldn't hold my breath... don't really get any views either and i try to stay lively on here. Patience is still needed i think for many of us haha  |
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It was a lunar eclipse this year so I got one!
Just messing! It does happen and it's happened to me few times but guys are definitely the more active on the site when it comes to messaging.
Being in demand, single ladies tend to set their preferences and sift through the messages. As much as some would complain, I think quite a lot of females love the attention. For some, it's a new experience that they don't get as much outside of fabs. For some, they get too much and it's a way of getting exactly what they want.
Either way, they get to call the shots how they see fit. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get messaged first by both women , couples and straight gay and bi men
Yesterday I was walking to get van from garage waiting to cross roAd , a 5/10 girl smiled at me I raised my eyebrows as if to say seriously , she said something anyway she gave number will text her Monday and go bowling
What I find hilarious is you see people at clubs naked etc then in real life you see them like tramps
espwciall the women . I know it's hard for women to look good al the time unlike us blokes that look good wearing whatever |
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It used to happen semi regularly when I was actively looking to meet new people.
I've never been one to meet lots of people anyway. I've had two regular (couple of years each, but not over lapping) fuck buddies and both had messaged me first. Both times, having seen their private pics, I thought someone was winding me up !
If it doesn't happen very often, but leads to regular fun with amazing people, then I'm happy with that
Oh, the last one was this week btw |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would message first if something caught my attention and made me smile from theur profile.
If i got a wink ir a puc fabbed and i liked what i saw then i wld wink back |
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By *UNCHBOXMan
over a year ago
folkestone |
Yes, pretty much all my meets have come through either them(couples) messaging me or them pm me in the chatroom, from people who i have met recommending me to couples they know. I think if you put effort into how you put yourself across in your profile, and have good feedback, then the right couples will find you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On occasion, its nice when it happens. It's usually after I've posted something less drivel like on the forums and I give the impression of being a sane and amusing person. They soon learn otherwise |
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To be fair, it happens a fair amount. Sure, I message the odd few people too - but I have had some lovely people contact me, too.
Write a nice profile; take some half-tasteful pictures & it's very possible |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes, its happened to me a few times in fact more times than me messaging others (but only because I very rarely do). Dont know what the secret is, probably just to have a decent well written profile that highlights one or two particular things that interest you. That will then spark someone else's interest to talk to you if its something that they are also interested in or want to try. For me its usually been about someone wanting to experiment with a club meet or with a cuckold/voyeur scenario. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol."
I wish |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi, I have never had anyone either a single girls or couple ever message me first. It is always me having to message them first.
So this leads to my question, is there any single mens who gets messaged first by either a single girl or couple? Just wondered whether single mens always do the chasing lol."
I do all the time I make it a point never to message any woman first |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is rare to recieve a message from a lady or couple first, but it happens once in a while. Have met 2 women and a couple this way and we have met several times since. But it hardly happens this way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just from the other side of things
I don't message guys first as its a waste of time
I used to when I joined and for a while after but I never got a reply, I didn't mail daily as i didn't see anybody I liked enough to mail on a daily basis but if I did see a profile that cought my eye I would mail first, probably two or three times a week, but of all the messages I sent out I never got a single reply, not even a no thanks, so I stopped
It seemed pointless mailing guys to get no reply and just seemed to make more sence to go through mail I got and reply to the ones that took my interest as at least they had some interest in me
I must admit ever now and again I see a profile and I'm really tempted to mail but I don't bother as I know from my track record what the outcome will be |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just from the other side of things
I don't message guys first as its a waste of time
I used to when I joined and for a while after but I never got a reply, I didn't mail daily as i didn't see anybody I liked enough to mail on a daily basis but if I did see a profile that cought my eye I would mail first, probably two or three times a week, but of all the messages I sent out I never got a single reply, not even a no thanks, so I stopped
It seemed pointless mailing guys to get no reply and just seemed to make more sence to go through mail I got and reply to the ones that took my interest as at least they had some interest in me
I must admit ever now and again I see a profile and I'm really tempted to mail but I don't bother as I know from my track record what the outcome will be "
awwww was it mine ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just from the other side of things
I don't message guys first as its a waste of time
I used to when I joined and for a while after but I never got a reply, I didn't mail daily as i didn't see anybody I liked enough to mail on a daily basis but if I did see a profile that cought my eye I would mail first, probably two or three times a week, but of all the messages I sent out I never got a single reply, not even a no thanks, so I stopped
It seemed pointless mailing guys to get no reply and just seemed to make more sence to go through mail I got and reply to the ones that took my interest as at least they had some interest in me
I must admit ever now and again I see a profile and I'm really tempted to mail but I don't bother as I know from my track record what the outcome will be
awwww was it mine ? "
How did you guess
I have a fetish for headless men who live 140 mile away |
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"Recently, I have contacted 15 single guys - 7 of whom were not really single, 2 had lied on their profile, one said he wasn't interested, and 4 I am chatting to now, and 1 deleted unread...
Its tough going."
Not wanting to play the "poor single guy" card too much, but a 4 in 15 response rate would make my year! 15 messages all deleted or left unread is "tough going"!
That said, I have been lucky enough to have received a few initial messages from women in the past, some of which lead to some really fun times. I do love it when it happens, especially if they share my particular interests. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do get messages, some lead to something and a lot don't. I use this site as a supplement to clubs and socials and it works well.
I think if a guy soley relies on this place for meets he will find it a struggle for any continuity |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Agree with above post, as a single guy i take this site with a pinch of salt. Plenty of great single females and couples to chat to about things you wouldn't normal chat about in the 'real world'.
Go to a club, you can get your personality across in person and the ladies may flock |
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