FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > stop stop stop with this crazy fingerings craze!!
stop stop stop with this crazy fingerings craze!!
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By *urvyemma OP Woman
over a year ago
wigan/bolton |
I was wondering if I am the only woman who is tired of being fingered by men who seem to be on a mission to make me squirt. One technique. .fingers in and go mental on my insides with no let up!
I do not squirt! I do not want to squirt. I tell people I do not squirt.
There are other ways of being fingered! I like being fingered hard (sometimes) but maybe a bit of variation other than frantic mental power drill action
What happened to the fingering techniques of the 1990s..those were the days. Sigh. ..
Any women out there know what I am talking about? |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"Any women out there know what I am talking about? "
Yes, and its not nice. So painful, and not sexy at all. I do squirt, but in my own time.
If a guy at a club starts fingering my like he's trying to pump up an airbed I push him away and find someone less selfish. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Totally agree, I've done it before but can't say I enjoyed it! I've had a guy bruise me he was trying so hard! There are much much more enjoyable things x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
If a guy at a club starts fingering my like he's trying to pump up an airbed I push him away and find someone less selfish."
Men will now be rushing out to buy airbeds to finger  |
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By *urvyemma OP Woman
over a year ago
wigan/bolton |
"Yes. Hate it. Asked a guy a couple of times to stop, which he did. He started at it again a few minutes later so I left."
Yes this exactly. .I felt it was because he literally didn't have any other moves |
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Hiya Mickey here and kind of understand What you mean with the number of squirting threads
Minnie has never squirted and isn't that bothered whether she does or not as long as she has fun
From a male point of view as long as the lady I'm doing it to is enjoying what I'm doing that's good enough for me. If I can make her cum doing it even better |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the problem is a lot of guys think gushing is an orgasum when it's not
So they are on a mission to make you squirt/gush to fill their ego because they don't feel you have cum unless they see fluid
I have never cum when I've gushed, I don't like gushing, I don't like the sensation of it because guys usually hurt me to get me to that point |
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By *ngeluk69Woman
over a year ago
Near enough |
"I was wondering if I am the only woman who is tired of being fingered by men who seem to be on a mission to make me squirt. One technique. .fingers in and go mental on my insides with no let up!
I do not squirt! I do not want to squirt. I tell people I do not squirt.
There are other ways of being fingered! I like being fingered hard (sometimes) but maybe a bit of variation other than frantic mental power drill action
What happened to the fingering techniques of the 1990s..those were the days. Sigh. ..
Any women out there know what I am talking about? "
Agree!!!!
Sick of guys fingering away like they're on a mission to make me pee myself (yes yes I know that it's not all urine before anyone tries to bash me on that) OR attempting to fist me (after having 2 very natural births I have no wish for huge man hands to be shoved up me without at least a little warm up)
Guys, give it a rest, take it slow, if a woman wants you to go harder, faster, stronger we are very capable of letting you know... Wait for the tell tale signs, the hip movements, the sounds etc. do not just go for it, you would hate it if us women just started pulling on ya cocks like we're plunging a blocked toilet, so how about you treat us with the same level of respect.
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I think some guys see making a woman squirt as a bit of a challenge and do it for their own ego boost rather than the pleasure of the woman. Rather see a woman have pleasure at her own pace rather than thrust upon her ( pun intended ) as it were. |
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By *urvyemma OP Woman
over a year ago
wigan/bolton |
"I was wondering if I am the only woman who is tired of being fingered by men who seem to be on a mission to make me squirt. One technique. .fingers in and go mental on my insides with no let up!
I do not squirt! I do not want to squirt. I tell people I do not squirt.
There are other ways of being fingered! I like being fingered hard (sometimes) but maybe a bit of variation other than frantic mental power drill action
What happened to the fingering techniques of the 1990s..those were the days. Sigh. ..
Any women out there know what I am talking about?
Agree!!!!
Sick of guys fingering away like they're on a mission to make me pee myself (yes yes I know that it's not all urine before anyone tries to bash me on that) OR attempting to fist me (after having 2 very natural births I have no wish for huge man hands to be shoved up me without at least a little warm up)
Guys, give it a rest, take it slow, if a woman wants you to go harder, faster, stronger we are very capable of letting you know... Wait for the tell tale signs, the hip movements, the sounds etc. do not just go for it, you would hate it if us women just started pulling on ya cocks like we're plunging a blocked toilet, so how about you treat us with the same level of respect.
"
Well explained. .slow build and let me tell you harder. .when I am ready..slow and teasey gets me so much wetter |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the problem is many men say they know how to get a woman to squirt... Ramming around and trying to cause friction burns! I squirt mainly when using a toy on the outside, have no technique or control. Sometimes it happens, sometimes it doesn't . Very different feeling and enjoyable but do prefer a long and prolonged multi orgasm any day! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's a health hazard and I forbid anyone to do it now. I've been fortunate to have had a couple of men who use the correct technique of gentle strokes of the clitoris and soft penetration inside. I'd like to find the man who decided forcing a woman to piss herself was the ultimate in sexual pleasure and fuck his prostate with a toilet brush
That may have been a little rant there  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"... Old Skool fingering .... Preferably on a sofa.... Takes me back to my teenage years ...happy days !!!
Yep this! Maybe with a snog tasting of slightly warm special brew! "
Skol lager you mean
Ah,the days of the fingering snog in the tool shed  |
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I agree with all that's said above. I've seen guys at clubs going at a woman like they're clearing a blocked drain... I call it 'The Dynarod Method' and it looks awful and feels worse. Just stop it guys! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a health hazard and I forbid anyone to do it now. I've been fortunate to have had a couple of men who use the correct technique of gentle strokes of the clitoris and soft penetration inside. I'd like to find the man who decided forcing a woman to piss herself was the ultimate in sexual pleasure and fuck his prostate with a toilet brush
That may have been a little rant there "
Bloody genius!
Marry me, please?
Xxx |
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Yeah I was talking about this .I never do it hard hard. I like to start soft and slow and touch ever part of the girls body at the same time. But I've never made a girl squirt, and this makes me think that I'm not doing it hard enough,that won't make me go harder though. I don't like to cause any pain besides cock going in too deep lol.
I'd love to caress a pussy with my mouth for as long as it took to make somebody capable of squirting squirt. x |
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By *urvyemma OP Woman
over a year ago
wigan/bolton |
"Yeah I was talking about this .I never do it hard hard. I like to start soft and slow and touch ever part of the girls body at the same time. But I've never made a girl squirt, and this makes me think that I'm not doing it hard enough,that won't make me go harder though. I don't like to cause any pain besides cock going in too deep lol.
I'd love to caress a pussy with my mouth for as long as it took to make somebody capable of squirting squirt. x"
There are many many many women who don't want to squirt. ..they want to orgasm! You carry on just as you are!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah I was talking about this .I never do it hard hard. I like to start soft and slow and touch ever part of the girls body at the same time. But I've never made a girl squirt, and this makes me think that I'm not doing it hard enough,that won't make me go harder though. I don't like to cause any pain besides cock going in too deep lol.
I'd love to caress a pussy with my mouth for as long as it took to make somebody capable of squirting squirt. x"
Forget about squirting altogether and focus on the pleasure you and her are getting. Do you feel like you orgasm when you pee? Neither do I |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a health hazard and I forbid anyone to do it now. I've been fortunate to have had a couple of men who use the correct technique of gentle strokes of the clitoris and soft penetration inside. I'd like to find the man who decided forcing a woman to piss herself was the ultimate in sexual pleasure and fuck his prostate with a toilet brush
That may have been a little rant there
Bloody genius!
Marry me, please?
Xxx"
Ok but I can't cook xx |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
Everyone is different and likes to be played with in different ways. Over the course of a relationship you get to learn their likes and dislikes, but in the swinging world we are generally talking about one off encounters or just a few encounters.
If either men or women aren't enjoying what their partner is doing, why not say " I find it really sexy when you do it this way". Tell them, show them and everyone will have a great time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As well as the squirting obsession, men tend to like their cocks rubbed hard, so assume this is the way to get a girl off too. I remember one ex stopping me and saying 'Paul, it's a pussy, what are you doing??' That got the message across...
Over time, I've learned that a single finger, rhythmically pushed in and out, varying medium pressure at different points on the outside and inside tends to get the best reactions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I agree! In my experience it is the younger guys who get really excited by the whole squirting thing and... I HATE IT. I've squirted twice, both times it was sore, both times it was 'violent', neither time did I orgasm.
Soft, slow, some build up, please! |
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By *urvyemma OP Woman
over a year ago
wigan/bolton |
"As well as the squirting obsession, men tend to like their cocks rubbed hard, so assume this is the way to get a girl off too. I remember one ex stopping me and saying 'Paul, it's a pussy, what are you doing??' That got the message across...
Over time, I've learned that a single finger, rhythmically pushed in and out, varying medium pressure at different points on the outside and inside tends to get the best reactions "
Ok that's just turned me on a little bit. .lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am with the op and other ladies on this thread when they say guys just fingering roughly...
But its not just guys and women If you have nails please take extra care.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm happy to say I don't do this! I find it quite awkward and much prefer clit stroking and actually getting a woman to enjoy it! Isn't that what sex is about? If a woman squirts, then so be it, but it's far from the be all and end all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I was wondering if I am the only woman who is tired of being fingered by men who seem to be on a mission to make me squirt. One technique. .fingers in and go mental on my insides with no let up!
I do not squirt! I do not want to squirt. I tell people I do not squirt.
There are other ways of being fingered! I like being fingered hard (sometimes) but maybe a bit of variation other than frantic mental power drill action
What happened to the fingering techniques of the 1990s..those were the days. Sigh. ..
Any women out there know what I am talking about? "
I've never understood piledriving my fingers into a woman's sensitive area's as a pleasant experience, I'd rather stroke it and kiss it. Unless specifically asked for more or harder, I will continue to be as gentle as I can be |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As well as the squirting obsession, men tend to like their cocks rubbed hard, so assume this is the way to get a girl off too. I remember one ex stopping me and saying 'Paul, it's a pussy, what are you doing??' That got the message across...
well
Over time, I've learned that a single finger, rhythmically pushed in and out, varying medium pressure at different points on the outside and inside tends to get the best reactions "
not necessarily.. girls who think cocks have to be violently attached to make them go are not for me, they always end up pulling to far back, and that's just ouch! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I agree! In my experience it is the younger guys who get really excited by the whole squirting thing and... I HATE IT. I've squirted twice, both times it was sore, both times it was 'violent', neither time did I orgasm.
Soft, slow, some build up, please!"
In my experience it's any age. I think it's the ones who watch porn and talk about it with mates who think it has to be done. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Definitely blame porn. .I met a few younger guys and seemed to be only move they knew!!"
Speaking as a younger couple who play in clubs. The furious finger blasting is something Mrsdpt hates, but loads of guys seem to focus on squirting more than anything else |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am with the op and other ladies on this thread when they say guys just fingering roughly...
But its not just guys and women If you have nails please take extra care.
"
Also, calloused fingers from guitar playing or hard labour can cause problems, I have to be very careful about mine, because even if I'm being gentle, I've had women say ouch and I've instantly changed technique |
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"Yeah I was talking about this .I never do it hard hard. I like to start soft and slow and touch ever part of the girls body at the same time. But I've never made a girl squirt, and this makes me think that I'm not doing it hard enough,that won't make me go harder though. I don't like to cause any pain besides cock going in too deep lol.
I'd love to caress a pussy with my mouth for as long as it took to make somebody capable of squirting squirt. x"
At the same time  n like a sexy octopus (sorry couldn't help it) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was wondering if I am the only woman who is tired of being fingered by men who seem to be on a mission to make me squirt. One technique. .fingers in and go mental on my insides with no let up!
I do not squirt! I do not want to squirt. I tell people I do not squirt.
There are other ways of being fingered! I like being fingered hard (sometimes) but maybe a bit of variation other than frantic mental power drill action
What happened to the fingering techniques of the 1990s..those were the days. Sigh. ..
Any women out there know what I am talking about? "
yes indeedy, now its a finger with no care |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Being brought up a Catholic in the 60s and 70s and of course being a good Catholic boy  , albeit with raging testosterone overload, meant I leart the exquisite pleasure that fingering can bring along with a sexy erotic snog. For a number of years that was my only sexual contact with girls until with one girlfriend we plucked up the courage to pop each other's cherries so to speak. To this day it is still one of my favourite things to do sexually. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Admin should make every guy on fabs read this post!
I long to meet a guy from here that knows how to caress a pussy properly ..not attempt to tickle my throat from my pussy upwards |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm happy to say I don't do this! I find it quite awkward and much prefer clit stroking and actually getting a woman to enjoy it! Isn't that what sex is about? If a woman squirts, then so be it, but it's far from the be all and end all"
See I'm not keen on a random meet stroking my clit either . I just wish more guys would watch to see what the woman responds or doesn't respond to. I never suck a guys cock the same as I did the last guys x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a guy and before a meet I take the time and care needed to make sure my nails are trimed no sharp bits and I always take time when fingering a lady to take in her response to the attention im giving the gush or not is a bonus not a prize her ultimate pleasure is the prize  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Do you orgasm in your vagina. So by internal stimulation with vigorous fingers/cock/toy which is when you ladies squirt or by stimulating your clit? My good lady loves both but the former needs vigorous stimulation. Just tell chaps what you like. Some of us love that! Enjoy xxxxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I want my body to be adored and caressed,not abused."
Amen sister. Anyone tries finger blasting my delicate flower I'll chop their frigging fingers off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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an interesting and enlightening thread this, must admit I discovered my "gift" for making women squirt only recently, ie last 5 years, I never treat it as the be all and end all of the sexual experience and appreciate that the female orgasm however that is achieved is the primary enjoyable sensation. However I have to say I've received only positive responses, both during and after, from the ladies I've done it to so it's a surprise to learn of this universal loathing on here.
Whilst I acknowledge the prevalance of a particular genre of porn nowadays seems to "inspire" some men to re-enact this as though they were in front of the cameras there are plenty of women out there who do enjoy the rough with the smooth and it's not entirely a figment of the male porn viewer's imagination as this thread would have you believe. |
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By *urvyemma OP Woman
over a year ago
wigan/bolton |
No, absolutely agree with you..as I say I do like it hard sometimes and think women on here do too . I think maybe the point we want to make is..start slow and let the woman give you some signals that she wants it harder/faster.
I think maybe I am just meaning guys in clubs and meets who just launch in and start pumping away with no build up or when you say gentle or slow down they stop for a min and then seem at a total loss as to what to do so go right back to crazy ass pumping again.
Time and a place and all that! |
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I'm going to go against the grain here. I like being fingered. I enjoy being fingered quite hard too. In fact, give me someone who spends ten minutes trying to make me squirt over someone who wants to spend all night licking me. Now that, I don't get. Does nothing for me and I can live without it. |
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By *urvyemma OP Woman
over a year ago
wigan/bolton |
"I'm going to go against the grain here. I like being fingered. I enjoy being fingered quite hard too. In fact, give me someone who spends ten minutes trying to make me squirt over someone who wants to spend all night licking me. Now that, I don't get. Does nothing for me and I can live without it. "
Ha ha I can live without hours of oral too..am I coming across as hard to please?? |
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"I'm going to go against the grain here. I like being fingered. I enjoy being fingered quite hard too. In fact, give me someone who spends ten minutes trying to make me squirt over someone who wants to spend all night licking me. Now that, I don't get. Does nothing for me and I can live without it. "
You know what I like? A bloke who takes the time to find out whether I want him to do the stuff he's about to do. I imagine men like the same from women too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Bloody hell, this is hard work today!
Hard finger, gentle lick... no lick and rough finger, slow then fast, squirt or not?
Its a wonder us men can keep up! Haha |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"I'm going to go against the grain here. I like being fingered. I enjoy being fingered quite hard too. In fact, give me someone who spends ten minutes trying to make me squirt over someone who wants to spend all night licking me. Now that, I don't get. Does nothing for me and I can live without it.
You know what I like? A bloke who takes the time to find out whether I want him to do the stuff he's about to do. I imagine men like the same from women too. "
A man taking directions from a woman? Never happen!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"an interesting and enlightening thread this, must admit I discovered my "gift" for making women squirt only recently, ie last 5 years, I never treat it as the be all and end all of the sexual experience and appreciate that the female orgasm however that is achieved is the primary enjoyable sensation. However I have to say I've received only positive responses, both during and after, from the ladies I've done it to so it's a surprise to learn of this universal loathing on here.
Whilst I acknowledge the prevalance of a particular genre of porn nowadays seems to "inspire" some men to re-enact this as though they were in front of the cameras there are plenty of women out there who do enjoy the rough with the smooth and it's not entirely a figment of the male porn viewer's imagination as this thread would have you believe."
I think the universal loathing is aimed at men that think all women are the same and want fingers rammed in them to make them squirt.
The loathing isn't aimed at respectful men, or at squirting as a thing, or even at a nice bit of fingering. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thought I was the only one who felt this way about it. Yes sometimes guys treat it as a challenge to make me gush/squirt whatever you call it, but actually I hate it! So from now on I'll not allow it. I like gentle, soft touching/fingering guys so take note my male friends! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"an interesting and enlightening thread this, must admit I discovered my "gift" for making women squirt only recently, ie last 5 years, I never treat it as the be all and end all of the sexual experience and appreciate that the female orgasm however that is achieved is the primary enjoyable sensation. However I have to say I've received only positive responses, both during and after, from the ladies I've done it to so it's a surprise to learn of this universal loathing on here.
Whilst I acknowledge the prevalance of a particular genre of porn nowadays seems to "inspire" some men to re-enact this as though they were in front of the cameras there are plenty of women out there who do enjoy the rough with the smooth and it's not entirely a figment of the male porn viewer's imagination as this thread would have you believe.
I think the universal loathing is aimed at men that think all women are the same and want fingers rammed in them to make them squirt.
The loathing isn't aimed at respectful men, or at squirting as a thing, or even at a nice bit of fingering. "
I read that last bit in the voice of Alan Bennett.......wrong, so very wrong  |
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well i love to finger and make a lady squirt, I do not go hell for leather a nice gentle build up, fingering licking tesaing followed by more fingering. So far i have made 8 women squirt who had never squirted before and no pain was had by anyone in the process. Guys it can be done treat a lady like a lady not a toy
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dearly hope that squirting goes out of fashion as quickly as it came in. In the meantime, we're forced to give every guy we meet advance warning not to try. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was wondering if I am the only woman who is tired of being fingered by men who seem to be on a mission to make me squirt. One technique. .fingers in and go mental on my insides with no let up!
I do not squirt! I do not want to squirt. I tell people I do not squirt.
There are other ways of being fingered! I like being fingered hard (sometimes) but maybe a bit of variation other than frantic mental power drill action
What happened to the fingering techniques of the 1990s..those were the days. Sigh. ..
Any women out there know what I am talking about?
Agree!!!!
Sick of guys fingering away like they're on a mission to make me pee myself (yes yes I know that it's not all urine before anyone tries to bash me on that) OR attempting to fist me (after having 2 very natural births I have no wish for huge man hands to be shoved up me without at least a little warm up)
Guys, give it a rest, take it slow, if a woman wants you to go harder, faster, stronger we are very capable of letting you know... Wait for the tell tale signs, the hip movements, the sounds etc. do not just go for it, you would hate it if us women just started pulling on ya cocks like we're plunging a blocked toilet, so how about you treat us with the same level of respect.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"an interesting and enlightening thread this, must admit I discovered my "gift" for making women squirt only recently, ie last 5 years, I never treat it as the be all and end all of the sexual experience and appreciate that the female orgasm however that is achieved is the primary enjoyable sensation. However I have to say I've received only positive responses, both during and after, from the ladies I've done it to so it's a surprise to learn of this universal loathing on here.
Whilst I acknowledge the prevalance of a particular genre of porn nowadays seems to "inspire" some men to re-enact this as though they were in front of the cameras there are plenty of women out there who do enjoy the rough with the smooth and it's not entirely a figment of the male porn viewer's imagination as this thread would have you believe."
The problem is that some men think they have a "gift" for making women squirt so they always want to try and do it.
Squirting doesn't feel very nice. I don't want anyone to try. At all. Ever.
Negotiate activities in rather than assuming people want to do things. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"an interesting and enlightening thread this, must admit I discovered my "gift" for making women squirt only recently, ie last 5 years, I never treat it as the be all and end all of the sexual experience and appreciate that the female orgasm however that is achieved is the primary enjoyable sensation. However I have to say I've received only positive responses, both during and after, from the ladies I've done it to so it's a surprise to learn of this universal loathing on here.
Whilst I acknowledge the prevalance of a particular genre of porn nowadays seems to "inspire" some men to re-enact this as though they were in front of the cameras there are plenty of women out there who do enjoy the rough with the smooth and it's not entirely a figment of the male porn viewer's imagination as this thread would have you believe.
The problem is that some men think they have a "gift" for making women squirt so they always want to try and do it.
Squirting doesn't feel very nice. I don't want anyone to try. At all. Ever.
Negotiate activities in rather than assuming people want to do things."
where have I said I assume the woman wants it, please don't put words in my mouth |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
An all over fanny massage does the trick outside then inside gentle but firm drives my Mrs mental.She said I should open a walk in fanny massage parlor.I had to agree what a great job that would be |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"As well as the squirting obsession, men tend to like their cocks rubbed hard, so assume this is the way to get a girl off too. I remember one ex stopping me and saying 'Paul, it's a pussy, what are you doing??' That got the message across...
Over time, I've learned that a single finger, rhythmically pushed in and out, varying medium pressure at different points on the outside and inside tends to get the best reactions
Ok that's just turned me on a little bit. .lol"
It feels even better in real life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"an interesting and enlightening thread this, must admit I discovered my "gift" for making women squirt only recently, ie last 5 years, I never treat it as the be all and end all of the sexual experience and appreciate that the female orgasm however that is achieved is the primary enjoyable sensation. However I have to say I've received only positive responses, both during and after, from the ladies I've done it to so it's a surprise to learn of this universal loathing on here.
Whilst I acknowledge the prevalance of a particular genre of porn nowadays seems to "inspire" some men to re-enact this as though they were in front of the cameras there are plenty of women out there who do enjoy the rough with the smooth and it's not entirely a figment of the male porn viewer's imagination as this thread would have you believe.
The problem is that some men think they have a "gift" for making women squirt so they always want to try and do it.
Squirting doesn't feel very nice. I don't want anyone to try. At all. Ever.
Negotiate activities in rather than assuming people want to do things.
where have I said I assume the woman wants it, please don't put words in my mouth"
I never said you did. But I get a message every other day from guys saying they have a gift for making women squirt. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn "
Never been rough.....don't watch much porn, if it involves that kinda stuff it's a turn off to be fair!
I have, however had many ladies squirt/gush etc....and never any complaints. Ffs. How can bashing away and being rough get anywhere.....some guys...Jeez! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"an interesting and enlightening thread this, must admit I discovered my "gift" for making women squirt only recently, ie last 5 years, I never treat it as the be all and end all of the sexual experience and appreciate that the female orgasm however that is achieved is the primary enjoyable sensation. However I have to say I've received only positive responses, both during and after, from the ladies I've done it to so it's a surprise to learn of this universal loathing on here.
Whilst I acknowledge the prevalance of a particular genre of porn nowadays seems to "inspire" some men to re-enact this as though they were in front of the cameras there are plenty of women out there who do enjoy the rough with the smooth and it's not entirely a figment of the male porn viewer's imagination as this thread would have you believe.
The problem is that some men think they have a "gift" for making women squirt so they always want to try and do it.
Squirting doesn't feel very nice. I don't want anyone to try. At all. Ever.
Negotiate activities in rather than assuming people want to do things.
where have I said I assume the woman wants it, please don't put words in my mouth
I never said you did. But I get a message every other day from guys saying they have a gift for making women squirt."
I would never meet a guy who messaged me that
Guys fixated on making me gush do nothing for me at all |
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By *urvyemma OP Woman
over a year ago
wigan/bolton |
"an interesting and enlightening thread this, must admit I discovered my "gift" for making women squirt only recently, ie last 5 years, I never treat it as the be all and end all of the sexual experience and appreciate that the female orgasm however that is achieved is the primary enjoyable sensation. However I have to say I've received only positive responses, both during and after, from the ladies I've done it to so it's a surprise to learn of this universal loathing on here.
Whilst I acknowledge the prevalance of a particular genre of porn nowadays seems to "inspire" some men to re-enact this as though they were in front of the cameras there are plenty of women out there who do enjoy the rough with the smooth and it's not entirely a figment of the male porn viewer's imagination as this thread would have you believe.
The problem is that some men think they have a "gift" for making women squirt so they always want to try and do it.
Squirting doesn't feel very nice. I don't want anyone to try. At all. Ever.
Negotiate activities in rather than assuming people want to do things.
where have I said I assume the woman wants it, please don't put words in my mouth
I never said you did. But I get a message every other day from guys saying they have a gift for making women squirt.
I would never meet a guy who messaged me that
Guys fixated on making me gush do nothing for me at all "
Nope instant turn off! If I read a profile that says 'I always make women squirt'..its a big fat nope from me! |
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Far too many men these days are obsessed with trying to make a girl squirt. By doing that they are missing those special little spots. Nice and gentlle all the way for me, with a little variation. It definitely works wonders and puts a smile on the girls face, each and every time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Fingers, lips tongue and ears. Listen to the lady and judge by the sounds if you're hitting the spot for her "
Ears are very good during sex more should use them
I swear though a lot of guys don't know the different between a wince in pain and a moan of pleasure
Not being sexist but I don't play with women so can't comment on their abilities |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If a guy even asks me, when we're chatting, if I squirt, I instantly lose interest and decide I don't want to meet him.
I'm not a performing circus animal."
My retort is I'm not Moby Dick |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think another question arises, why do some women seem to think that's OK? I've noticed a few posts saying men and women, but surely a woman would know how it feels |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn "
I blame porn for a lot of things, seems as though it is setting a standard for people that is based on someone else's ideal, porn should be more real, the odd trip to the toilet, or sneaky trump, who wants to make a porn film, lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn
I blame porn for a lot of things, seems as though it is setting a standard for people that is based on someone else's ideal, porn should be more real, the odd trip to the toilet, or sneaky trump, who wants to make a porn film, lol "
Ah me
I recon I could knock out some great realistic porn
Fanny farting, belly wobbling, you get the full package with me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn
I blame porn for a lot of things, seems as though it is setting a standard for people that is based on someone else's ideal, porn should be more real, the odd trip to the toilet, or sneaky trump, who wants to make a porn film, lol
Ah me
I recon I could knock out some great realistic porn
Fanny farting, belly wobbling, you get the full package with me "
Carry On Porno, shame Sid is no longer with us, would you like that, you and Sid,? ,lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn
I blame porn for a lot of things, seems as though it is setting a standard for people that is based on someone else's ideal, porn should be more real, the odd trip to the toilet, or sneaky trump, who wants to make a porn film, lol "
while not being a porn watcher myself , all i consider is..its a movie essentially..its edited to show the best bits..its OK for us enlightened swingers to all have a viewpoint..but most of us dont have the skills to be porn editors, producers,directors..and probably most importantly actors lol |
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As a lady who didn't want this, just say "Yeah, all guys can gush too. Let me stick 2 fingers up your ass and frig away like Billy oh until I am satisfied you may not be enjoying it...or you bleed. After that, fill your boots" |
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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago
Bristol |
If there was an applause emoticon OP I would be using it right now. Finesse, variety and you'll know you've got the technique right when I start wriggling and making the right noises. And by noises I mean vocally, not squelchily. A girl has to have some build up. And I don't squirt. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I was wondering if I am the only woman who is tired of being fingered by men who seem to be on a mission to make me squirt. One technique. .fingers in and go mental on my insides with no let up!
I do not squirt! I do not want to squirt. I tell people I do not squirt.
There are other ways of being fingered! I like being fingered hard (sometimes) but maybe a bit of variation other than frantic mental power drill action
What happened to the fingering techniques of the 1990s..those were the days. Sigh. ..
Any women out there know what I am talking about? "
Well you see here's a thing.
Up until now I have always been a gentle fingerer! As I am when making love.
However on a meet last year the guy made Jools squirt like a hosepipe.
We had absolutely no idea that she could do this or that it was a thing.
She wants me to be able to make her squirt.
Much to My annoyance it's yet to happen.
I have tried every way,soft hard,teasing, tickling,hard in and out.
Nowt.
Tbh I just prefer to use gentle erotic fingering as part of foreplay and more sensual than the pressure of having to make her squirt.
And am now convinced that it's more of a state of mind rather than hitting exactly the right spot.
So I am going to go back to being gentle but firm. Not obsessed with the squirt.
If it happens great if not oh well.
She always has a great orgasm so what's the difference apart from some very wet bedding?
Mr whatshisname a fan of fingering since the 80's |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn
I blame porn for a lot of things, seems as though it is setting a standard for people that is based on someone else's ideal, porn should be more real, the odd trip to the toilet, or sneaky trump, who wants to make a porn film, lol
while not being a porn watcher myself , all i consider is..its a movie essentially..its edited to show the best bits..its OK for us enlightened swingers to all have a viewpoint..but most of us dont have the skills to be porn editors, producers,directors..and probably most importantly actors lol"
Maybe the less contrived the better, homemade porn seems the best stuff.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn
I blame porn for a lot of things, seems as though it is setting a standard for people that is based on someone else's ideal, porn should be more real, the odd trip to the toilet, or sneaky trump, who wants to make a porn film, lol
while not being a porn watcher myself , all i consider is..its a movie essentially..its edited to show the best bits..its OK for us enlightened swingers to all have a viewpoint..but most of us dont have the skills to be porn editors, producers,directors..and probably most importantly actors lol"
Speaking of porn, I actually haven't watched any in ages. I prefer to perv fab now. Either way, while the harder stuff was OK for quick release, I actually originally watched porn to learn more about different ways of having sex, so I've watched a lot of different things, but the ones that stuck with me were the ones with plenty of foreplay and buildup because something in my brain decided that was more natural, plus, having been brought up from a background where sexual openness was not a thing, I see sex as creating a bond, and it has been very difficult to distinguish between love and sex, so, for me, it makes sense to worship the person I'm with, and be flexible to their needs, but that's kinda my personality anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The people who say that the ramming is down to porn, have they actually watched enough porn to say it is the cause? I think it may be an easy assumption. I would suggest the cause of heavy handedness is more likely to be down to experience and social bravado.
As someone who started as "slowhand" I have been surprised by the number of women that I have met since I started swinging two years ago who like: (a) to be handled hard; (b) who like as many fingers as possible; and (c) to squirt. Actually most of the women in category (c) have been proud of being able to squirt and measure a man's dexterity by his ability to make her orgasm by squirting.
However, (as this thread shows and as most reasonable people will know) being masturbated is an individual experience for both women and men and everyone has their preferences. It requires the toucher to be sensitive and for the person being touched providing the right feedback straight away. A forceful approach is just one one word in the dictionary of love. Sometimes yelling is right sometimes a whisper.
The simple answer is that if a toucher starts doing something uncomfortable give them immediate guidance. If a person cannot take guidance then stop the play. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn
I blame porn for a lot of things, seems as though it is setting a standard for people that is based on someone else's ideal, porn should be more real, the odd trip to the toilet, or sneaky trump, who wants to make a porn film, lol
while not being a porn watcher myself , all i consider is..its a movie essentially..its edited to show the best bits..its OK for us enlightened swingers to all have a viewpoint..but most of us dont have the skills to be porn editors, producers,directors..and probably most importantly actors lol
Maybe the less contrived the better, homemade porn seems the best stuff.
"
to the average guy who buys porn..do you think he's concerned if its contrived?
home made might be realistic etc..but at the end of it, most will want the quality of the production, which includes professional equipment and qualified people to operate.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Years ago I was shown a video on a porn site that was an instructional video on how to make a woman squirt. It wasn't called that,I can't remember what it was called. The instructions were to insert fingers,curl them up,press on the abdomen with the palm of your other hand and move your fingers in and out vigorously. The woman sprayed everywhere and was bouncing around massage bed like a jumping bean,squealing like a little girl. Not long after that a man tried to do it with me,with no warning. Since then,more and more men started talking about it and on here it's almost every man who messages. |
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By *urvyemma OP Woman
over a year ago
wigan/bolton |
"Years ago I was shown a video on a porn site that was an instructional video on how to make a woman squirt. It wasn't called that,I can't remember what it was called. The instructions were to insert fingers,curl them up,press on the abdomen with the palm of your other hand and move your fingers in and out vigorously. The woman sprayed everywhere and was bouncing around massage bed like a jumping bean,squealing like a little girl. Not long after that a man tried to do it with me,with no warning. Since then,more and more men started talking about it and on here it's almost every man who messages. "
Yup!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Years ago I was shown a video on a porn site that was an instructional video on how to make a woman squirt. It wasn't called that,I can't remember what it was called. The instructions were to insert fingers,curl them up,press on the abdomen with the palm of your other hand and move your fingers in and out vigorously. The woman sprayed everywhere and was bouncing around massage bed like a jumping bean,squealing like a little girl. Not long after that a man tried to do it with me,with no warning. Since then,more and more men started talking about it and on here it's almost every man who messages. "
I felt a bit unwell just reading that?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Years ago I was shown a video on a porn site that was an instructional video on how to make a woman squirt. It wasn't called that,I can't remember what it was called. The instructions were to insert fingers,curl them up,press on the abdomen with the palm of your other hand and move your fingers in and out vigorously. The woman sprayed everywhere and was bouncing around massage bed like a jumping bean,squealing like a little girl. Not long after that a man tried to do it with me,with no warning. Since then,more and more men started talking about it and on here it's almost every man who messages.
I felt a bit unwell just reading that??"
Retarded phone, that wasn't a question lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn
I blame porn for a lot of things, seems as though it is setting a standard for people that is based on someone else's ideal, porn should be more real, the odd trip to the toilet, or sneaky trump, who wants to make a porn film, lol
while not being a porn watcher myself , all i consider is..its a movie essentially..its edited to show the best bits..its OK for us enlightened swingers to all have a viewpoint..but most of us dont have the skills to be porn editors, producers,directors..and probably most importantly actors lol
Maybe the less contrived the better, homemade porn seems the best stuff.
to the average guy who buys porn..do you think he's concerned if its contrived?
home made might be realistic etc..but at the end of it, most will want the quality of the production, which includes professional equipment and qualified people to operate.."
Not sure, homemade is quite big, but you have a point, it doesn't bring in the big bucks. It's young lads that seem the most affected by it, it sets them up with unrealistic ideals of sexual relationships, they don't get why their girlfriend isn't a " slut" or " whore", and doesn't give them a BJ at the drop of a hat. |
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"Years ago I was shown a video on a porn site that was an instructional video on how to make a woman squirt. It wasn't called that,I can't remember what it was called. The instructions were to insert fingers,curl them up,press on the abdomen with the palm of your other hand and move your fingers in and out vigorously. The woman sprayed everywhere and was bouncing around massage bed like a jumping bean,squealing like a little girl. Not long after that a man tried to do it with me,with no warning. Since then,more and more men started talking about it and on here it's almost every man who messages.
Yup!! "
I also have the joy of eczema in some rather intimate places  I don't meet unless it's all good but vigorous fingering can break the skin and cause me quite a lot of pain that lasts
Totally the opposite of what they think will happen and it's scary how many will listen to me when I explain why they shouldn't but still try to do it anyway!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I was wondering if I am the only woman who is tired of being fingered by men who seem to be on a mission to make me squirt. One technique. .fingers in and go mental on my insides with no let up!
I do not squirt! I do not want to squirt. I tell people I do not squirt.
There are other ways of being fingered! I like being fingered hard (sometimes) but maybe a bit of variation other than frantic mental power drill action
What happened to the fingering techniques of the 1990s..those were the days. Sigh. ..
Any women out there know what I am talking about? "
I agree I'm not a squirter I end up in pain sometimes from a man trying to get me to do it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Any women out there know what I am talking about?
Yes, and its not nice. So painful, and not sexy at all. I do squirt, but in my own time.
If a guy at a club starts fingering my like he's trying to pump up an airbed I push him away and find someone less selfish."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"...
The simple answer is that if a toucher starts doing something uncomfortable give them immediate guidance. If a person cannot take guidance then stop the play."
Women.... please!!! If they hurt you or do something you don't like, SPEAK UP!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"...
The simple answer is that if a toucher starts doing something uncomfortable give them immediate guidance. If a person cannot take guidance then stop the play.
Women.... please!!! If they hurt you or do something you don't like, SPEAK UP!! "
Totally agree, some people seem to think it's wrong to communicate with their partner. |
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"...
The simple answer is that if a toucher starts doing something uncomfortable give them immediate guidance. If a person cannot take guidance then stop the play.
Women.... please!!! If they hurt you or do something you don't like, SPEAK UP!! "
Always communicate. God or bad. Stand your ground. Sex is at least a 2 way Street. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
If she does or doesn't, I have no interest in squirting, It's the visual effect and sound that she makes that turns me on,
As for doing it hard, I would rather watch her doing it and judge by that how she likes it,
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn
I blame porn for a lot of things, seems as though it is setting a standard for people that is based on someone else's ideal, porn should be more real, the odd trip to the toilet, or sneaky trump, who wants to make a porn film, lol
while not being a porn watcher myself , all i consider is..its a movie essentially..its edited to show the best bits..its OK for us enlightened swingers to all have a viewpoint..but most of us dont have the skills to be porn editors, producers,directors..and probably most importantly actors lol
Maybe the less contrived the better, homemade porn seems the best stuff.
to the average guy who buys porn..do you think he's concerned if its contrived?
home made might be realistic etc..but at the end of it, most will want the quality of the production, which includes professional equipment and qualified people to operate..
Not sure, homemade is quite big, but you have a point, it doesn't bring in the big bucks. It's young lads that seem the most affected by it, it sets them up with unrealistic ideals of sexual relationships, they don't get why their girlfriend isn't a " slut" or " whore", and doesn't give them a BJ at the drop of a hat."
No,it really isn't only young men who are affected by it. I don't know how young you mean but men in their 30s, 40s and 50s are the same. I've met a lot of men under 30 who have no interest in making me squirt,or think women are their purely for their pleasure. You can't keep blaming inexperience or youth for everything. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think that its also the difference between being 'fucked' and being 'made love to'.
Meeting someone new means taking a bit of time to get to know what makes them tick, their desires etc and how their body responds because this isn't one way is right, one is wrong.
Treat me as an idividual!!
And then when we have worked it out together we have a much more fulfilling experience! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"...
The simple answer is that if a toucher starts doing something uncomfortable give them immediate guidance. If a person cannot take guidance then stop the play.
Women.... please!!! If they hurt you or do something you don't like, SPEAK UP!! "
Some don't stop even when asked
I remember a guy once and I told him he would have to stop as he was hurting me and his answer to that was to lube his hand up and try to carry on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"...
The simple answer is that if a toucher starts doing something uncomfortable give them immediate guidance. If a person cannot take guidance then stop the play.
Women.... please!!! If they hurt you or do something you don't like, SPEAK UP!!
Some don't stop even when asked
I remember a guy once and I told him he would have to stop as he was hurting me and his answer to that was to lube his hand up and try to carry on "
Why didn't you leave?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just commented about this on another thread
I know where your coming from
I hate finger ramming, love a nice gentle finger but guys seem to be so rough now days
I blame porn
I blame porn for a lot of things, seems as though it is setting a standard for people that is based on someone else's ideal, porn should be more real, the odd trip to the toilet, or sneaky trump, who wants to make a porn film, lol
while not being a porn watcher myself , all i consider is..its a movie essentially..its edited to show the best bits..its OK for us enlightened swingers to all have a viewpoint..but most of us dont have the skills to be porn editors, producers,directors..and probably most importantly actors lol
Maybe the less contrived the better, homemade porn seems the best stuff.
to the average guy who buys porn..do you think he's concerned if its contrived?
home made might be realistic etc..but at the end of it, most will want the quality of the production, which includes professional equipment and qualified people to operate..
Not sure, homemade is quite big, but you have a point, it doesn't bring in the big bucks. It's young lads that seem the most affected by it, it sets them up with unrealistic ideals of sexual relationships, they don't get why their girlfriend isn't a " slut" or " whore", and doesn't give them a BJ at the drop of a hat.
No,it really isn't only young men who are affected by it. I don't know how young you mean but men in their 30s, 40s and 50s are the same. I've met a lot of men under 30 who have no interest in making me squirt,or think women are their purely for their pleasure. You can't keep blaming inexperience or youth for everything. "
Thank you. I was very much at a loss for a response to that comment |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
The simple answer is that if a toucher starts doing something uncomfortable give them immediate guidance. If a person cannot take guidance then stop the play.
Women.... please!!! If they hurt you or do something you don't like, SPEAK UP!!
Some don't stop even when asked
I remember a guy once and I told him he would have to stop as he was hurting me and his answer to that was to lube his hand up and try to carry on "
That sounds like very dark territory. I'm glad that's nothing worse than tried, but horrified it's that far |
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"Do guys think squirt = orgasm or something? "
I think it's more a case of guys are aroused more visually than women so the fact the squirt/gush is a physical display makes them feel like they've achieved something but I'm with the majority on this I'd rather orgasm instead |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do guys think squirt = orgasm or something?
I think it's more a case of guys are aroused more visually than women so the fact the squirt/gush is a physical display makes them feel like they've achieved something but I'm with the majority on this I'd rather orgasm instead "
Think you've hit the nail on the head there |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry to bring up porn again, but I had a thought on another thread, so I've copied what I posted for here
Agreed, especially after oral, someone has just done something amazing for you (well, not always) at least give them a kiss to show your appreciation and affection for what they've done (unless they say not to) which is another thing, you don't get people in porno saying "hey, wait a sec, let's not do that" because it's not scripted in... Preferences have already been taken into account before the camera starts rolling, except in public humiliation and bdsm I think, where they have the discussions at the beginning and end where it goes into more details, but that's not really mainstream |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Inexperience? I love to tease her with my fingers, as we snog and I kiss her neck, gently rubbing her slit, wetting my finger ad tickling her clit, slowly easing one, then two fingers inside and cupping her clit in the palm of my hand as I gently explore her. It's all about gauging the reaction, if she responds I'll build up the momentum and force, then, as we snog, put my fingers between our lips so we can taste her. different want different things, some slow and gentle, some hard and rough in my experience. Happy to oblige either, as I love the feel of a hot wet pussy, almost as much as devouring one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've Been told my fingers are amazing. But with each individual, it's totally different. Speed, pressure, angles, directions.
Obviously finger blasting ever woman until they fall off the bed isn't the best move. |
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"Hiya Mickey here and kind of understand What you mean with the number of squirting threads
Minnie has never squirted and isn't that bothered whether she does or not as long as she has fun
From a male point of view as long as the lady I'm doing it to is enjoying what I'm doing that's good enough for me. If I can make her cum doing it even better "
Totally agree with your last paragraph, some guys cant seem to grasp that swinging is all about mutual
pleasure |
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"Hiya Mickey here and kind of understand What you mean with the number of squirting threads
Minnie has never squirted and isn't that bothered whether she does or not as long as she has fun
From a male point of view as long as the lady I'm doing it to is enjoying what I'm doing that's good enough for me. If I can make her cum doing it even better Totally agree with your last paragraph, some guys cant seem to grasp that swinging is all about mutual
pleasure "
All sexual experiences should be about mutual pleasure |
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