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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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How do you combat jealousy ... I mean when your husband really fancys the person and you see him really having a good time with her how do I stop the jealousy  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think every one is different but for us if we have been troubled in this way best thing for us is talking it through and to find out exactly why or how and you could very well be surprised as to why you think or how/why there so turned on by the encounter x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"well when he is using the profile and clicks on forum posts,He might ask you how your feeling about it  who are you talking about x
The op lol "
Soz ok and ta x |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
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I think jealousy will show its ugly face at some point for most couples while swinging. I think it depends a lot on your individual dynamics and experience as to how to deal with it.
I think an important thing to decide is are you jealous because he jas feeling for one person, or are you jealous of him swinging in general?
If you both started thinking that you just want some extra fun, and you are not interested in poly or anything along those lines, then i think its fine to talk about it, try to get to the bottom of those feelings, but ultimately you should be able to say, i don't want you to speak to her, or play with her anymore. |
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"How do you combat jealousy ... I mean when your husband really fancys the person and you see him really having a good time with her how do I stop the jealousy "
I don't think you can stop yourself feeling something. Talk to him and try and work out what you hope for and expect from this. I can't imagine that he wants to have bad sex with someone he doesn't fancy so you might have a problem. If it's something that is going to cause problems you might need to step back for a bit your relationship with him is more important. |
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I would say this probably isn't really for you personally I loved to see my former partner get fully immersed in enjoying another woman afterall it's a physical connection between him and her in that moment and real feelings he has are for you so your getting the more meaningful sex anyway and no matter how much he enjoys get at the time she can't compete with his feelings for you or shouldn't anyway |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would say this probably isn't really for you personally I loved to see my former partner get fully immersed in enjoying another woman afterall it's a physical connection between him and her in that moment and real feelings he has are for you so your getting the more meaningful sex anyway and no matter how much he enjoys get at the time she can't compete with his feelings for you or shouldn't anyway "
This. Envy is one thing but jealousy has the ability to destroy a relationship. |
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Communication is the key. Jealousy is a natural instinct that protects us to a point but it can be very detrimental if not discussed. Our first FFM Ja and our companion continued to play when I left the room. This made me feel uncomfortable. We talked about it and now when one of us has to use the bathroom etc the other considerately stops play. Swinging is a game, a fantastic game but can only really work if there is trust x |
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"I would say this probably isn't really for you personally I loved to see my former partner get fully immersed in enjoying another woman afterall it's a physical connection between him and her in that moment and real feelings he has are for you so your getting the more meaningful sex anyway and no matter how much he enjoys get at the time she can't compete with his feelings for you or shouldn't anyway "
I agree with this and if you don't or can't feel this way damage will occur. It's down to the two people in the relationship to ensure they both feel secure enough and talking to each other rather than asking people from outside for ways to prevent feelings is the only thing that will work. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I never feel jealous when Marc is with another woman. If I did, I would stop swinging the next day.
I have felt, when speaking with other couples in anticipation of actually playing, that the woman in the relationship was jealous. In one instance, the woman actually walked away mid-convo while the man happily continued talking. We have never played in these instances because things were obviously off-kilter with these couples.
Perhaps you should hold off on swinging until you've spoken about these feeling and determined whether they will actually be a hindrance to you having fun.
-Courtney |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you combat jealousy ... I mean when your husband really fancys the person and you see him really having a good time with her how do I stop the jealousy "
You take time out and chat about your feelings ...As this can rip couples apart swinging .. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you combat jealousy ... I mean when your husband really fancys the person and you see him really having a good time with her how do I stop the jealousy "
is it just the one person.? Does it not bother you with others? Do you enjoy seeing him enjoy himself with others...?
If the answer is its just this one person and you enjoy it with others.. it maybe just u need to stop having interaction with this one person. But you need to ask yourself is it really her or the way he is that bothers you.
If its him and her... Then simple answer is you cut her out... If its the way her is.. well that is much harder to sort.
Jealousy is an emotion that even those who say they don't suffer it can suddenly find themselves struggling with it and if left unchecked it can cause problems.
Talk and talk some more x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Jealousy is a negative but inevitable emotion . Embrace it , face it and beat it .
If you are harbouring the tummy churning negative feeling , see if you can't reverse the negative and use it as a positive . Sounds odd but the jealousy can be a trigger for feeling aroused .
But then maybe that might just be me .
If you try this and it doesn't work and you are still left a feeling angry , hurt and wracked with negativity , swinging may not be for you . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Should question the strength of you relationship, if it wasn't strong in the first place and you've allowed him to go a and fuck different women then I don't think you will reign him in. If you are strong together I wouldn't worry and you should enjoy yourself and try abit of role reversal and see if he gets jelous, which he should |
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"Yes it's real feelings I am fine with someone I feel he does not feel attracted to ??"
Would you have sex with someone you're not attracted to?
My personal view is that you should quit while you're ahead. If there are doubts on either side then stop. Communicate with your partner.
I'm only looking at it from the other perspective. If I play with a couple, I want them to be rock solid together. I don't want one without the other and I most certainly do not want the blame for coming between them due to one person's insecurities. It's an unfair and unpleasant position to be put in.
Sort out your own feelings, with your partner, before involving a third party. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This is a tough one - when here previously, I had a fem FB we met very reg - 2/3 week - and we also played on our own separate profiles - she had one guy she met , who demanded she only saw him and not me, we dealt with it by simply reminding him this is a swingers life style and to go play with his willy alone - after all we had a couples profile, which sort of gave it away lol |
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