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Rejected
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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hi all.
Not sure I'm right for this site. I've had my confidence knocked right out. I've arranged meets with people and even as gone as far as to traveling to there town and waiting on the train station for hours because they haven't turned up. That one went quite, other dude arranged a meet and obviously didn't like what he saw so still carried on talking then arranged another date then ignored me after that, which was annoying. Was my only day off in months and was totally waisted. Actually got a meet off this profile but was blocked and deleted afterwards without a verification (what he got out of that I don't know), surely after fucking a girl a little verification isn't too much to ask for. I'm constantly getting messages with compliments and I can't take them. I just think everyone is lying. I know I'm not a supermodel but Jesus I'm not a tramp either. Just a normal looking person. So had two meets and been rejected which is a major put down. Don't want a relationship just a bit of respect. Totally cruel to waist my time. I value what little time I have.
Perhaps I should just stick to clubs? Anyone else had problems regarding not getting verifications? I got one of a friend I used to meet but that's it. Need a pep talk or something |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I rarely do one on one meets for this reason
I don't travel far either
Big hug. ( men can be bastards ) 
Do you speak and exchange numbers before meeting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You look gorgeous from your profile pics
Dust yourself off and keep trying. There are people out there worth meeting
For the record if we were closer v we'd meet you and actually turn up xx"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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K - those that have stood you up are not worth getting concered overok - you read/look fine and I am oretty sure all men and some of the couples that reply to this topic, will agree they not chuck you out of bed lol - - as for how to avoid such idiots is relatively simple - 1.Always insist on exchanging recent pictures 2. Always talk on the phone (mobile) 3. Tell him / them the first meet is 100% social ONLY (tends to sort the sex seekers out from serious swingers) 4. Never travel to him, make him come to you/meet you
Just my ideas - Happier Fabbing |
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By *itSamCouple
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"Can people tell someone is 'gorgeous' just from looking at a bum picture and a fanny?"
Yur you look up the translation I think. "Hey you are gorgeous and they are mad" translates to... "If I feel sorry for you will you suck my cock"
No disrespect to OP just a general comment. See it on a lot of forums... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can people tell someone is 'gorgeous' just from looking at a bum picture and a fanny?We were thinking that."
It's all about T n F. Personality and looks mean squat!.....oh no wait...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah, but just getting rejected by them going quite or just being cruel.
I totally agree, some can be."
Chin up and smile I am sure your already getting loads of messages with blokes wanting to take you for a coffee and verify you x |
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Might need a little spruce up on how you filter the people you choose to meet
Why don't you use the clubs you visit to choose the people you wish to meet again in private. We find that a much better way |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I. Thinking maybe, just arrange a meet at a club, travel to charms, have some fun, if they don't turn up I got lots of fun. Bit daunting going on your own though. Had problems before when been left for a few seconds. What would a whole night be like. Wish I could just find a friend to have fun with |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think we can fathom some people on here?
So don't bother ? Make them come to you !
You look worth it they will come !!
If not like what has been said get to the clubs then your in control? |
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"I. Thinking maybe, just arrange a meet at a club, travel to charms, have some fun, if they don't turn up I got lots of fun. Bit daunting going on your own though. Had problems before when been left for a few seconds. What would a whole night be like. Wish I could just find a friend to have fun with"
That is exactly what we do.
I can really see how daunting that would be too! How about a female sidekick or a friendly couple to go with?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Rejection is never great for anyone and we have all had it at sometime in a fabs life. Maye change your filters like some have suggested or if your finding these people a certain way look else where or for something else. This does not mean however that you should change your requirements in that you have to have an attraction to the person.
Maybe if you have not visited a club as a single try speaking to one of the other ladies and goes as friends? Good luck and don't let the buggers put you off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Try a social only meet first as it helps get rid of the cum dumpers. Arrange to meet people in clubs but with no expectations. Decent men aren't easy to find, so much tighten up your search criteria and be choosy. Better luck if you continue on. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Yes, looking into changing filters. I did sort it out but for some reason still getting messages from unverified. Yes I agree, find a friend or couple that way, nothing is expected but both still can have fun |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Lol read it again Hun!
I said it might not be for me but need a pep talk. Dumbing it down it means I don't really wanna leave I just need my faith restored!
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How did you find the meet that you got off your profile who blocked you after without verifying you? Did you think it was a good meet?
Just interested to know, seems a strange reaction from him...? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So as you can see a lot are saying it's my requirements that are the problem. So kinda my own fault. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who's been dubbed into thinking it was a good meet and turns out to be time wasters, I refuse to blame just my self here.
Anyone else had people who have met and waisted time afterwards? Surely I'm not the only one who is dabbing wrong! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Didn't last forever, was a very short meet but was fun all the same. Both had limited time. Performance was fun so don't understand what went wrong. Changed his name afterwards, then got a verify in different name on his profile then blocked me. Hmmmmmmm I too can't understand.
Think he just wanted someone to treat like a slut. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It happens, not everyone leaves a veri. I guess they want to be discreet who they are meeting and don't wanna display it, maibe they are married or something. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So as you can see a lot are saying it's my requirements that are the problem. So kinda my own fault. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who's been dubbed into thinking it was a good meet and turns out to be time wasters, I refuse to blame just my self here.
Anyone else had people who have met and waisted time afterwards? Surely I'm not the only one who is dabbing wrong!"
How does one become a time waster after they've met you? They've had their fun. Chose not to keep in touch. It's fairly brutal but simple, this doesn't make them a time waster  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Filter, filter , filter - has worked a treat for me!
And if they don't leave a veri, then its a good escape for you!
Good luck on the site and keep at it, some gems on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I sympathise!
But maybe better filtering and get to a club- that will restore your confidence.
I have gone to Chams loads of times on my own. Get changed and go and have a laugh with the bar staff- if they are made aware you are on your own they will look after you! And I guarantee you won't be alone for long!
xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Didn't last forever, was a very short meet but was fun all the same. Both had limited time. Performance was fun so don't understand what went wrong. Changed his name afterwards, then got a verify in different name on his profile then blocked me. Hmmmmmmm I too can't understand.
Think he just wanted someone to treat like a slut."
Maybe change the description of what you want? There are guys who think submissive women have no self confidence and will treat you like dirt.
Get a friend or a couple to go with you to clubs as well. Good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Loads of people get cold feet- I know that I get nervous before meeting anyone- but would never deliberately muck them around. It's just common courtesy to hold your hands up and say 'sorry, bottled it', so why don't these people do that? It's a bit like swimming through shit at times, but when you do meet the genuine ones, they certainly make up for the jokers. Problem isn't you, it's them. Chin up babe x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I. Thinking maybe, just arrange a meet at a club, travel to charms, have some fun, if they don't turn up I got lots of fun. Bit daunting going on your own though. Had problems before when been left for a few seconds. What would a whole night be like. Wish I could just find a friend to have fun with
That is exactly what we do.
I can really see how daunting that would be too! How about a female sidekick or a friendly couple to go with?
"
I go by myself, it's not like I'm walking in to some lair, everybody I've met has always been lovely and respectful. I prefer going alone as there's no expectation. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Just gone through my filters. I'm being messaged by non verifieds and others that I blocked yet still getting them. Hmmmmm not sure if the filters do much here.
Blocked TVs but still getting messages, blocked no verifieds still getting messages, blocked newbies, still getting them. Do you have to be a site supporter to apply it? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Didn't say he was a time waster, said he rejected me afterwards.
I'm sure if you spent £30 meeting someone asking for a verification isn't much to ask for!
A verification is where you prove you are real and meet when say you do. So pretty important on here so actually was a waste of my time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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But you've already got a veri' that shows you're real. No more proof needed.
Think you're just over analysing what's happened. Best to just move on and forget it, make it an experience to make you wiser in the future. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can people tell someone is 'gorgeous' just from looking at a bum picture and a fanny?"
cause having a fanny means she's female therefore everybody wants to meet here so tells her she's gorgeous
don't you know how it works on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just gone through my filters. I'm being messaged by non verifieds and others that I blocked yet still getting them. Hmmmmm not sure if the filters do much here.
Blocked TVs but still getting messages, blocked no verifieds still getting messages, blocked newbies, still getting them. Do you have to be a site supporter to apply it?"
No. You just click the apply changes button at the bottom! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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One thing is for certain K - this topic alone will have enhanced your chases of finding a gent that will meet when arranged, because if he didn't, I'm sure we all get to know and out him lol -happy fabbing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Didn't say he was a time waster, said he rejected me afterwards.
I'm sure if you spent £30 meeting someone asking for a verification isn't much to ask for!
A verification is where you prove you are real and meet when say you do. So pretty important on here so actually was a waste of my time."
No, you are misusing the term timewaster.
He may have only wanted to meet you the once, hence him blocking you, therefore a verification would be pointless as it wouldn't show.
I don't leave veris for everyone I meet & don't expect them to either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Didn't say he was a time waster, said he rejected me afterwards.
I'm sure if you spent £30 meeting someone asking for a verification isn't much to ask for!
A verification is where you prove you are real and meet when say you do. So pretty important on here so actually was a waste of my time."
rejected you after?
odd thing to say, it's a swinging site what did you expect after a commitment?
you already have a verification which shows you are genuine you don't get more genuine the more you have, one verification is all you need to prove you are who you say you are surely
if I met somebody and all they were bothered about after was if j verified them or not I'd find that a little insulting surely it's the meet that matters |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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That maybe you, but I was looking for my first verification at the time. We agreed on it. I went there expecting a verification ad. I honestly don't wanna be that girl who bitches about someone's performance but 30 mins they left me on doorstep is a waist of time. Most of that time was waiting for window cleaner to hurry up n go. I'm pretty sure when they arrange dates as well and ignore after its time waiting. Especially if I book those of work.
I think that's your opinion and this is mine not fact |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Didn't say he was a time waster, said he rejected me afterwards.
I'm sure if you spent £30 meeting someone asking for a verification isn't much to ask for!
A verification is where you prove you are real and meet when say you do. So pretty important on here so actually was a waste of my time.
No, you are misusing the term timewaster.
He may have only wanted to meet you the once, hence him blocking you, therefore a verification would be pointless as it wouldn't show.
I don't leave veris for everyone I meet & don't expect them to either."
I understand where yourcoming from re veri's - I do think they are / shuld be a recognition of the relationship you had with the other person - sex/social/on going/friendship etc - but I would also agree that not every meet needs one - I am openly bisexual, so it should be no shock that I am on the sister site of Fabguys as well, where I veri's but only from honest, real people not the one min wonder suckers who come at the sight of a willy" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I meet I always verify the other. My first meet wouldn't verify me for some reason but she wanted a second meet. I met her again and alas no verification then either. But in the end I got verified. You look really nice in your pics. They'd be a fool not to want to meet or verify you. Chin up x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Chill out man!
Like I said he was first to meet but needed that verification so I could meet other where on earth does that say I wanted commitment.
Pisses me off, I'm not a stupid little girl wants a be, I'm a swinger, I have had fun before but since I got single it's been hard. Very hard |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Chill out man!
Like I said he was first to meet but needed that verification so I could meet other where on earth does that say I wanted commitment.
Pisses me off, I'm not a stupid little girl wants a be, I'm a swinger, I have had fun before but since I got single it's been hard. Very hard"
Wow that's escalated quickly! |
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Go to a social and you can get 10 veri's in one go. In the end they don't actually mean much.
You can happily have great private meets you just have to figure out how to best go about it. We've had some really really good private meets with people we have previously met at clubs.
You are over analysing, don't worry about it so much. It's just fun. If some don't want to play again with you who cares there are a ton of others that will |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Think this is getting a little out of hand.
Was asking for a bit of community support. I got that then some how a few got annoyed at my post. So leaving this dead now.
Thanks to the nice ones for advice and to the ones who just came to criticise I hope you enjoy your swinging and find happiness.
Still can't believe she just openly admitted to using men and then ignoring them and getting enjoyment out of it, for you Hun, hope you get a taste of your own medical. I would quite happy see you collared |
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"Chill out man!
Like I said he was first to meet but needed that verification so I could meet other where on earth does that say I wanted commitment.
Pisses me off, I'm not a stupid little girl wants a be, I'm a swinger, I have had fun before but since I got single it's been hard. Very hard
Wow that's escalated quickly!"
it only takes a second. WOW  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Think this is getting a little out of hand.
Was asking for a bit of community support. I got that then some how a few got annoyed at my post. So leaving this dead now.
Thanks to the nice ones for advice and to the ones who just came to criticise I hope you enjoy your swinging and find happiness.
Still can't believe she just openly admitted to using men and then ignoring them and getting enjoyment out of it, for you Hun, hope you get a taste of your own medical. I would quite happy see you collared"
wow, you're polite! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can people tell someone is 'gorgeous' just from looking at a bum picture and a fanny?"
Glad someone said it.
I am not suggesting the OP is not gorgeous, but at the same time none of us know.
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It's a swingers site ffs.
People get fucked, do the fucking and sometimes get fucked over.
From your pictures you look like your in fine fettle.
Veris mean nothing unless it's an Ebay type system based on looks, performance , size etc .like an out of 5 score.
We don't always give verifications because sometimes the people aren't what they say on the box or stage fright strikes etc.
Get over it and move on. Remember most blokes are dreamers, married or bullshitters to actually get one to turn up on time and perform is a bonus. Enjoy the moment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I must admit though OP this thread surprises me. Having been hear on and off for years I have come to the conclusion that anyone can get laid on here. As a single female I thought you would be fine. As a single female who is slim, I thought you would be over run! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive messaged you naughty as ive had similar experiences.dont let it worry you.go to chams n have fun.ill happily go to chams with you.never been before either |
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