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Best of both worlds
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Anyone on here feel like they have the best partner they could wish for but ultimately also feel that they need fulfilling in other ways (sexually) outside of the relationship? You might have a good sex life in the relationship too, but just also want to be able to lead the single life and get it elsewhere....? Is this 'normal' or completely unacceptable?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you're talking about cheating, there is already a thread about that.
If you are referring to couples who swing, then I would say that I personally don't "need" anything apart from Marc. This is all just a bit of fun. But some couples also swing separately, so maybe they would be good to answer this.
-Courtney |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Life shouldn't stop when you get married... for either of you. That's the whole point of swinging imo... to keep enjoying all the benefits which outgoing fun-loving singles enjoy... but doing it together with your partner. For too many couples the doors close, their relationship becomes like a impenetrable castle, and they really miss out unnecessarily on some of the fun things in life. So be cool... open up those doors a little... and remember... don't cheat   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I have the best of both worlds in being bisexual. It's normal for me even though it's actually abnormal. "
I am openly bisexual and don't feel abnormal  |
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"I think I have the best of both worlds in being bisexual. It's normal for me even though it's actually abnormal.
Not really what I'm talking about here although I wouldn't say it's 'abnormal'"
Oh yeah sorry  |
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"Life shouldn't stop when you get married... for either of you. That's the whole point of swinging imo... to keep enjoying all the benefits which outgoing fun-loving singles enjoy... but doing it together with your partner. For too many couples the doors close, their relationship becomes like a impenetrable castle, and they really miss out unnecessarily on some of the fun things in life. So be cool... open up those doors a little... and remember... don't cheat "
Good post and sound advice
I guess that leads to my next Q and probably one that's been asked countless times before - apologies. But how do you approach the idea of swinging with a partner who you think would be raging, not like the idea and in its very meaning take this to mean cheating even if she's involved? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would broach the subject with her rather than a bunch of strangers.
If you can't do that then maybe she's not the best partner you could wish for, if you can't even communicate with her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Life shouldn't stop when you get married... for either of you. That's the whole point of swinging imo... to keep enjoying all the benefits which outgoing fun-loving singles enjoy... but doing it together with your partner. For too many couples the doors close, their relationship becomes like a impenetrable castle, and they really miss out unnecessarily on some of the fun things in life. So be cool... open up those doors a little... and remember... don't cheat
Good post and sound advice
I guess that leads to my next Q and probably one that's been asked countless times before - apologies. But how do you approach the idea of swinging with a partner who you think would be raging, not like the idea and in its very meaning take this to mean cheating even if she's involved? "
You do realize half the people who respond will tell you to talk to her and the other half will tell you to show her your profile, right? I'm just looking to save you some time reading the responses.
-Courtney |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Life shouldn't stop when you get married... for either of you. That's the whole point of swinging imo... to keep enjoying all the benefits which outgoing fun-loving singles enjoy... but doing it together with your partner. For too many couples the doors close, their relationship becomes like a impenetrable castle, and they really miss out unnecessarily on some of the fun things in life. So be cool... open up those doors a little... and remember... don't cheat
Good post and sound advice
I guess that leads to my next Q and probably one that's been asked countless times before - apologies. But how do you approach the idea of swinging with a partner who you think would be raging, not like the idea and in its very meaning take this to mean cheating even if she's involved? "
Think of swinging as an end goal which you may or may not achieve. Don't mention it at all... but simply ask her whether she has any sexual fantasies. Make it about her. If she has some... say you'd be up for trying them. If she asks whether you have any be honest, but perhaps not too extreme, perhaps mention "the usual" i.e. a threesome, having sex in nature... make it tame and hope that some of it appeals and none of it upsets. Just think gentle gentle... and then progress forward from there in baby steps.
If she has no fantasies then it's gonna be more of an uphill struggle... but some exposure to some nice porn for couples might get her more into the idea of watching others have sex... take her on naughty weekends.. then maybe suggest trying going to a sex club (a swinging club) "just to have a look" It's all about letting those fantasies grow rather than forcing her into anything. Over time, as she realises that you're a bit of a naughty boy she may get more into the idea of being kinky with you.
Now you've got this advice I'd personally advise closing your account and starting from where you are both at as a couple... then working towards the day when you can reopen it... with her knowledge and approval. Good luck |
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"I think I have the best of both worlds in being bisexual. It's normal for me even though it's actually abnormal. "
Ah yes, but then being bi sometimes feel like walking down the middle of the road dodging the traffic from both sides. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Life shouldn't stop when you get married... for either of you. That's the whole point of swinging imo... to keep enjoying all the benefits which outgoing fun-loving singles enjoy... but doing it together with your partner. For too many couples the doors close, their relationship becomes like a impenetrable castle, and they really miss out unnecessarily on some of the fun things in life. So be cool... open up those doors a little... and remember... don't cheat "
That's really disrespectful against people that have no desire to swing. Just because they only want sex with each other, doesn't mean they are missing out.  |
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And all the opprobrium can stop.
People do things - imperfect things - for a variety of reasons.
I love my woman, the best sex I've ever had with anyone has been with her and yet... and yet it's not enough.
Walk a mile in a man's shoes... |
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"And all the opprobrium can stop.
People do things - imperfect things - for a variety of reasons.
I love my woman, the best sex I've ever had with anyone has been with her and yet... and yet it's not enough.
Walk a mile in a man's shoes..."
...you'll have his shoes and a good head start  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Life shouldn't stop when you get married... for either of you. That's the whole point of swinging imo... to keep enjoying all the benefits which outgoing fun-loving singles enjoy... but doing it together with your partner. For too many couples the doors close, their relationship becomes like a impenetrable castle, and they really miss out unnecessarily on some of the fun things in life. So be cool... open up those doors a little... and remember... don't cheat
Good post and sound advice
Think of swinging as an end goal which you may or may not achieve. Don't mention it at all... but simply ask her whether she has any sexual fantasies. Make it about her. If she has some... say you'd be up for trying them. If she asks whether you have any be honest, but perhaps not too extreme, perhaps mention "the usual" i.e. a threesome, having sex in nature... make it tame and hope that some of it appeals and none of it upsets. Just think gentle gentle... and then progress forward from there in baby steps.
If she has no fantasies then it's gonna be more of an uphill struggle... but some exposure to some nice porn for couples might get her more into the idea of watching others have sex... take her on naughty weekends.. then maybe suggest trying going to a sex club (a swinging club) "just to have a look" It's all about letting those fantasies grow rather than forcing her into anything. Over time, as she realises that you're a bit of a naughty boy she may get more into the idea of being kinky with you.
Now you've got this advice I'd personally advise closing your account and starting from where you are both at as a couple... then working towards the day when you can reopen it... with her knowledge and approval. Good luck "
Absolutely this. I would say if she is a sexy person and enjoys sex then eventually you could find yourselves at that point in your relationship where u both want to explore more. We got into swinging because we'd pretty much done everything that two people can do together and wanted more.
If u want to go on this journey wih her then u need to explore as much as u can with her and let her know she can trust u and feel comfortable with every step before u even suggesting fab.
Be honest and dont lie or cheat because thats not what this lifestyle is about. You get more out if u can be completely open with each other.
Good luck.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Life shouldn't stop when you get married... for either of you. That's the whole point of swinging imo... to keep enjoying all the benefits which outgoing fun-loving singles enjoy... but doing it together with your partner. For too many couples the doors close, their relationship becomes like a impenetrable castle, and they really miss out unnecessarily on some of the fun things in life. So be cool... open up those doors a little... and remember... don't cheat
That's really disrespectful against people that have no desire to swing. Just because they only want sex with each other, doesn't mean they are missing out. "
Well... they're missing out on us for a start  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think I have the best of both worlds in being bisexual. It's normal for me even though it's actually abnormal.
Ah yes, but then being bi sometimes feel like walking down the middle of the road dodging the traffic from both sides. "
Stop walking. Let them surround you.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone on here feel like they have the best partner they could wish for but ultimately also feel that they need fulfilling in other ways (sexually) outside of the relationship? You might have a good sex life in the relationship too, but just also want to be able to lead the single life and get it elsewhere....? Is this 'normal' or completely unacceptable? "
nope .. never thought or felt this |
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