FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Is it really that hard?
Is it really that hard?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I can totally understand not replying to mail that contains 1 sentence or is obviously a cut and paste, but to ignore a considered one?
Is it just me? Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I just think that the women and couples get over whelmed with post and just dump the lot! As so many complaine that they get hundreds of answers to their requests! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you get over 1000 messages in a few days its not really possible to reply to messages whether they're thought out or not. "
Well stop being so bloody gorgeous then!!!!  |
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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago
leeds |
Do you reply to all the unsolicited postal mail you get through your letter box every day? My guess is the answer is no. Messages on fab are no different. It is no ruder to not reply to a message than it is to send an unsolicited one - it's just the way things work. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you get over 1000 messages in a few days its not really possible to reply to messages whether they're thought out or not.
Well stop being so bloody gorgeous then!!!! "
Sorry  haha |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Unsolicited junk mail? Think I covered that under cut and paste!
Would you ignore a hand written letter from a neighbour that was written in a friendly manner? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unsolicited junk mail? Think I covered that under cut and paste!
Would you ignore a hand written letter from a neighbour that was written in a friendly manner? "
If they wanted to meet for sex, definitely. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends if you were getting as many as some of the ladies do on here. I know it's frustrating but at the same time I can't really blame them. You just have to tale it on the chin and if you're that fussed about them......keep trying till you get a reply or get blocked!!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When you get over 1000 messages in a few days its not really possible to reply to messages whether they're thought out or not. "
As gorgeous as you are, I'm over 200 miles away and not in your age range, so I wouldn't be mailing you begging to meet!
Thanks all for replies, my first foray into the forums! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Unsolicited junk mail? Think I covered that under cut and paste!
Would you ignore a hand written letter from a neighbour that was written in a friendly manner?
If they wanted to meet for sex, definitely."
Depends on what they're like! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We always reply to a message where someone has clearly taken the time to read our profile.
Will add it's not just couples and women that don't reply to a well written message. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was with someone on Monday night. She been on two weeks so I know newbies get more at first....
During a break we both went on our fab accounts.
She had 632 messages in the previous 3 days....
Not possible to even look at...never mind to sort out and reply to any.
God only knows how mine got through.... |
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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago
leeds |
"Unsolicited junk mail? Think I covered that under cut and paste!
Would you ignore a hand written letter from a neighbour that was written in a friendly manner? "
We know our neighbours - we don't know some arbitrary sex starved man from the other end of the country who thinks we might be up for a fuck.
Incidentally we try to reply to all messages - even one liners - but if we message we don't expect answers - we might not be what they are looking for and we believe others should be able to run their profiles and message box as they wish. They don't owe us anything. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you reply to all the unsolicited postal mail you get through your letter box every day? My guess is the answer is no. Messages on fab are no different. It is no ruder to not reply to a message than it is to send an unsolicited one - it's just the way things work."
how does one differentiate between a solicited mail and an unsolicited one? Assuming that the sender meets the criteria laid out in the receivers profile.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can totally understand not replying to mail that contains 1 sentence or is obviously a cut and paste, but to ignore a considered one?
Is it just me? Lol"
I suspect people may have made the decision not to reply long before they open your message |
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well I read profiles before even entertains reading the message if the profile is a one liner, doesn't match what I'm looking for, or reads negatively I don't care what the message says I'm not interested |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can totally understand not replying to mail that contains 1 sentence or is obviously a cut and paste, but to ignore a considered one?
Is it just me? Lol
I suspect people may have made the decision not to reply long before they open your message"
Exactly what i was going to say. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"I can totally understand not replying to mail that contains 1 sentence or is obviously a cut and paste, but to ignore a considered one?
Is it just me? Lol
I suspect people may have made the decision not to reply long before they open your message"
This. 
We look at the senders profile before opening. If the profile is not what we're interested in in the slightest? We delete without reading.
As for your 'hand written letter from a neighbour' analogy? How many people you message for the first time do you actually know well? Or at all?
It's like comparing apples and oranges.
A message - any message - from a random stranger on the internet you've never seen, spoken to or even previously knew existed is unsolicited. Messages from existing friends and those you've met before? They are your 'neighbours'.
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can totally understand not replying to mail that contains 1 sentence or is obviously a cut and paste, but to ignore a considered one?
Is it just me? Lol
I suspect people may have made the decision not to reply long before they open your message
This.
We look at the senders profile before opening. If the profile is not what we're interested in in the slightest? We delete without reading.
As for your 'hand written letter from a neighbour' analogy? How many people you message for the first time do you actually know well? Or at all?
It's like comparing apples and oranges.
A message - any message - from a random stranger on the internet you've never seen, spoken to or even previously knew existed is unsolicited. Messages from existing friends and those you've met before? They are your 'neighbours'.
A"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Until recently, I replied to everyone who messaged me; even if to say no thanks.
I blocked single men the other day because it's just too much hard work to get the stupid ones to understand that although I'll message them back, that doesn't mean I want to fuck them/ suck their cock or anything else! 
I still reply to everyone else though :P |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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First i look at the profile and if the guy clearly hasn't read my profile i immediately block and delete the message.
If a guy has read my profile and i'm just not attracted to him i write politely saying no thanks. However now i have to block them too because they all write back "What is your type?" or "Didnt want to fuck you anyway" if i don't. And then men moan that they can't get meets.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I sometimes reply and usually they see this as a green light to engage in conversation. I get things like "why" … "what is it you're looking for", " at least I got a reply so what you up to blah blah"… "give me a chance" etc etc. It's better to just ignore. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unsolicited junk mail? Think I covered that under cut and paste!
Would you ignore a hand written letter from a neighbour that was written in a friendly manner? "
It's junk if the person isn't interested in you regardless of what they write. I do try to answer every message but some try even my patience and I've started to ignore and delete the odd one or two. I always reply to a first message |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always check the profile first.
In this case I'd delete without even reading the message as the profile has no decent pictures and is just a long badly worded rant about how no one wants to shag them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unsolicited junk mail? Think I covered that under cut and paste!
Would you ignore a hand written letter from a neighbour that was written in a friendly manner?
If they wanted to meet for sex, definitely."
In your profile you dis Chris De-burgh - Therefore your opinions should all be taken with a huge pinch of salt...(rocks in the corner and sings "Lady in Red").... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unsolicited junk mail? Think I covered that under cut and paste!
Would you ignore a hand written letter from a neighbour that was written in a friendly manner?
If they wanted to meet for sex, definitely.
Depends on what they're like! "
You have answered your own question. |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"I always check the profile first.
In this case I'd delete without even reading the message as the profile has no decent pictures and is just a long badly worded rant about how no one wants to shag them."
^^this |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"First i look at the profile and if the guy clearly hasn't read my profile i immediately block and delete the message.
If a guy has read my profile and i'm just not attracted to him i write politely saying no thanks. However now i have to block them too because they all write back "What is your type?" or "Didnt want to fuck you anyway" if i don't. And then men moan that they can't get meets.
"
That's not my style, but sounds like it's the norm  |
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By *onyneMan
over a year ago
Newcastle |
I think if you send a considered mail it has more chance of being read and replied too, as the important word is 'considered'...but it doesn't bring any guarantees...I do really think that some people here [mainly couples and single women] must be inundated with hundreds of messages a day...
You can imagine it is a minefield to trawl through every day... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As others have said , if I look at their profile and it's got no pics including a silhouette avatar or 8 cock pics and a one line profile. I don't generally reply. If their initial message captures my attention and their profile is good I would reply.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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States in site FAQ's that no reply means no thanks. I also read profiles 1st, if they are not what I'm looking for, sound whiney, have no pics or just cock pics, are married,too far away. etc etc etc, then I don't even read the message. If the profile is nice, but I just don't think they are for me, then I will read it, if that doesn't put me off i will send a thanks but no thanks message. You are not entitled to a reply. Get over yourself.  |
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"I always check the profile first.
In this case I'd delete without even reading the message as the profile has no decent pictures and is just a long badly worded rant about how no one wants to shag them."
Exactly this
Why would I want to meet anyone who's so ranty  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always check the profile first.
In this case I'd delete without even reading the message as the profile has no decent pictures and is just a long badly worded rant about how no one wants to shag them."
This profile is so negative boring that's where you might be going jazz it up a bit and you might get a message reply |
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"I always check the profile first.
In this case I'd delete without even reading the message as the profile has no decent pictures and is just a long badly worded rant about how no one wants to shag them."
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Looking at your profile, it doesn't look like you want to meet anyone. I have never read such an off putting profile, no wonder you don't get any replies  "
Thanks for your constructive criticism |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can totally understand not replying to mail that contains 1 sentence or is obviously a cut and paste, but to ignore a considered one?
Is it just me? Lol"
Just picked up on this - women and couples on here have the pick don't they and its their choices every time - I even find it harder as I am both Bi and attached - but after near on 9 years on scene off and on, I am quiet used to it and the sometime abuse that goes with it - but hey ho; I am thick skinned to which helps |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I agree about Reading profiles, I switch off if I find a ranting profile. Or a ranting update for that matter.
Thought I'd compose a ranting profile just to see the reaction from others. Got the response I imagined. Just interested to be on other side of the fence.
Normal profile resumed.... Lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I can totally understand not replying to mail that contains 1 sentence or is obviously a cut and paste, but to ignore a considered one?
Is it just me? Lol
Just picked up on this - women and couples on here have the pick don't they and its their choices every time - I even find it harder as I am both Bi and attached - but after near on 9 years on scene off and on, I am quiet used to it and the sometime abuse that goes with it - but hey ho; I am thick skinned to which helps "
Thick skin and not holding your breath helps |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always check the profile first.
In this case I'd delete without even reading the message as the profile has no decent pictures and is just a long badly worded rant about how no one wants to shag them.
"
We can all have different opinions on pictures |
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"I can totally understand not replying to mail that contains 1 sentence or is obviously a cut and paste, but to ignore a considered one?
Is it just me? Lol"
We endeavour to answer all messages sent to us...the considered ones get a more considered response though  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I can totally understand not replying to mail that contains 1 sentence or is obviously a cut and paste, but to ignore a considered one?
Is it just me? Lol
We endeavour to answer all messages sent to us...the considered ones get a more considered response though "
Here, here to that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always try to write a well considered and reasonably lengthy message but being dyslexic make it quite a challenge but it never bothers me when they get instantly deleted - makes the replies that I do get even more special
The replies that I particularly appreciate though, are those that say no thank you, because even though that person isn't interested they have taken time to respond, which, when you consider the tens of messages a day that women on here get , makes it a big deal |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always try to write a well considered and reasonably lengthy message but being dyslexic make it quite a challenge but it never bothers me when they get instantly deleted - makes the replies that I do get even more special
The replies that I particularly appreciate though, are those that say no thank you, because even though that person isn't interested they have taken time to respond, which, when you consider the tens of messages a day that women on here get , makes it a big deal"
We'll said! Totally agree. Thanks for your input |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always check the profile first.
In this case I'd delete without even reading the message as the profile has no decent pictures and is just a long badly worded rant about how no one wants to shag them.
Well given over 50% of your picture isn't of you but some random women it doesn't really matter if it's good or bad as it's not you..
We can all have different opinions on pictures"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The only reason women get loads of emails is cos the site is saturated with men and nothing else, its by luck your email will be read or even replied too lol. |
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"The only reason women get loads of emails is cos the site is saturated with men and nothing else, its by luck your email will be read or even replied too lol."
Noooooooooo don't start them off again..... lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only reason women get loads of emails is cos the site is saturated with men and nothing else, its by luck your email will be read or even replied too lol.
Noooooooooo don't start them off again..... lol "
I know lol, some Wednesday fun |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only reason women get loads of emails is cos the site is saturated with men and nothing else, its by luck your email will be read or even replied too lol.
Noooooooooo don't start them off again..... lol I know lol, some Wednesday fun "
Shag even you know that the reason these guys aren't getting meets is because of their profiles. Lmao! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only reason women get loads of emails is cos the site is saturated with men and nothing else, its by luck your email will be read or even replied too lol.
Noooooooooo don't start them off again..... lol I know lol, some Wednesday fun
Shag even you know that the reason these guys aren't getting meets is because of their profiles. Lmao!"
Yes or that the ones who are interested always live at the opposite end of the countrie lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only reason women get loads of emails is cos the site is saturated with men and nothing else, its by luck your email will be read or even replied too lol.
Noooooooooo don't start them off again..... lol I know lol, some Wednesday fun
Shag even you know that the reason these guys aren't getting meets is because of their profiles. Lmao!Yes or that the ones who are interested always live at the opposite end of the countrie lol."
You know shag, i have guys from here that travel from Plymouth to see me and i reckon they wouldn't do that if it wasn't worth it. Maybe you should try a far away lady, she might surprise you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only reason women get loads of emails is cos the site is saturated with men and nothing else, its by luck your email will be read or even replied too lol.
Noooooooooo don't start them off again..... lol I know lol, some Wednesday fun
Shag even you know that the reason these guys aren't getting meets is because of their profiles. Lmao!Yes or that the ones who are interested always live at the opposite end of the countrie lol.
You know shag, i have guys from here that travel from Plymouth to see me and i reckon they wouldn't do that if it wasn't worth it. Maybe you should try a far away lady, she might surprise you. "
Your right there and they met you, I should try it cos I have lots of contacts in Manchester. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The only reason women get loads of emails is cos the site is saturated with men and nothing else, its by luck your email will be read or even replied too lol.
Noooooooooo don't start them off again..... lol I know lol, some Wednesday fun
Shag even you know that the reason these guys aren't getting meets is because of their profiles. Lmao!Yes or that the ones who are interested always live at the opposite end of the countrie lol.
You know shag, i have guys from here that travel from Plymouth to see me and i reckon they wouldn't do that if it wasn't worth it. Maybe you should try a far away lady, she might surprise you. Your right there and they met you, I should try it cos I have lots of contacts in Manchester."
I agree. Few years ago now, but had a lady travel 150 miles to come meet me for a few hours, several times. Must be doing something right  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only reason women get loads of emails is cos the site is saturated with men and nothing else, its by luck your email will be read or even replied too lol.
Noooooooooo don't start them off again..... lol I know lol, some Wednesday fun
Shag even you know that the reason these guys aren't getting meets is because of their profiles. Lmao!Yes or that the ones who are interested always live at the opposite end of the countrie lol.
You know shag, i have guys from here that travel from Plymouth to see me and i reckon they wouldn't do that if it wasn't worth it. Maybe you should try a far away lady, she might surprise you. Your right there and they met you, I should try it cos I have lots of contacts in Manchester."
Glad to hear it! |
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