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Nicola Sturgeon?
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By *44bertCouple
over a year ago
Inverness |
"Fuck, Kiss or avoid??
. Definitely avoid . I find it hard to believe so many people would even consider voting for her or her policies "
Well, apart from the fact she's not actually standing for parliament... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister’s chauffeur driven car. Suddenly a cow jumps out into the road. They hit it full on and the car comes to a stop.Nicola in her usual jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur :
" You get out and check - you were driving."
The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead.
" You were driving, go and tell the farmer," says Nicola, ”I can’t afford to be blamed for anything.”
The chauffeur walks up the drive to the farmhouse and returns five hours later totally plastered,his hair ruffled and with a big grin on his face.
" My God, what happened to you ?" asks Nicola.
The chauffeur replies : " When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of single malt whisky,The wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me."
" What on earth did you say?" asks Nicola.
" I knocked on the door and when it was answered, I said to them, I'm Nicola Sturgeon’s chauffeur and I've just killed the cow." |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister’s chauffeur driven car. Suddenly a cow jumps out into the road. They hit it full on and the car comes to a stop.Nicola in her usual jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur :
" You get out and check - you were driving."
The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead.
" You were driving, go and tell the farmer," says Nicola, ”I can’t afford to be blamed for anything.”
The chauffeur walks up the drive to the farmhouse and returns five hours later totally plastered,his hair ruffled and with a big grin on his face.
" My God, what happened to you ?" asks Nicola.
The chauffeur replies : " When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of single malt whisky,The wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me."
" What on earth did you say?" asks Nicola.
" I knocked on the door and when it was answered, I said to them, I'm Nicola Sturgeon’s chauffeur and I've just killed the cow.""
 |
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"Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister’s chauffeur driven car. Suddenly a cow jumps out into the road. They hit it full on and the car comes to a stop.Nicola in her usual jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur :
" You get out and check - you were driving."
The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead.
" You were driving, go and tell the farmer," says Nicola, ”I can’t afford to be blamed for anything.”
The chauffeur walks up the drive to the farmhouse and returns five hours later totally plastered,his hair ruffled and with a big grin on his face.
" My God, what happened to you ?" asks Nicola.
The chauffeur replies : " When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of single malt whisky,The wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me."
" What on earth did you say?" asks Nicola.
" I knocked on the door and when it was answered, I said to them, I'm Nicola Sturgeon’s chauffeur and I've just killed the cow.""
. Excellent story |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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She is an excellent politician and has came across the best in the debates.
She has some brilliant policies for Scotland and if I was in Scotland she would be the person/party I would be voting for
Tories and Labour haven't exactly helped their case up there |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nicola Sturgeon has the most un-kissable lips Ive seen on a woman in ages!! 
My god, when did you get to see inside her kecks?"
Ha - well she'll be whoring herself around on Friday I think!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister’s chauffeur driven car. Suddenly a cow jumps out into the road. They hit it full on and the car comes to a stop.Nicola in her usual jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur :
" You get out and check - you were driving."
The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead.
" You were driving, go and tell the farmer," says Nicola, ”I can’t afford to be blamed for anything.”
The chauffeur walks up the drive to the farmhouse and returns five hours later totally plastered,his hair ruffled and with a big grin on his face.
" My God, what happened to you ?" asks Nicola.
The chauffeur replies : " When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of single malt whisky,The wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me."
" What on earth did you say?" asks Nicola.
" I knocked on the door and when it was answered, I said to them, I'm Nicola Sturgeon’s chauffeur and I've just killed the cow.""
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Most dangerous woman in the UK , would not trust her one bit, Alex Salmonds puppet as he failed in his independence promise to the Scottish people, then pretended to fall in his braveheart sword only to be reincarnated in the image of a Scottish terror with lipstick (no spelling mistake) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Avoid and build Hadrians wall 100 feet tall to stop anyone coming over the border. Cut all ties with Scotland "
Why? We're a lovely bunch - we really are! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Avoid and build Hadrians wall 100 feet tall to stop anyone coming over the border. Cut all ties with Scotland "
I love it, I love it, I love it.
You get a 100 foot mound of earth, Ed Cameron and Nigel Clegg. We get Nicola and Trident. Fancy a fight ? 
Get real folks, she is an ordinary lass made good. It is simple. She is approachable, doesn't cause so much grief she needs body guards and armed security.
Gary |
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By *nnyMan
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"Avoid and build Hadrians wall 100 feet tall to stop anyone coming over the border. Cut all ties with Scotland
I love it, I love it, I love it.
You get a 100 foot mound of earth, Ed Cameron and Nigel Clegg. We get Nicola and Trident. Fancy a fight ?
Get real folks, she is an ordinary lass made good. It is simple. She is approachable, doesn't cause so much grief she needs body guards and armed security.
Gary"
Nicola does, indeed, have a personal protection officer. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Avoid and build Hadrians wall 100 feet tall to stop anyone coming over the border. Cut all ties with Scotland
I love it, I love it, I love it.
You get a 100 foot mound of earth, Ed Cameron and Nigel Clegg. We get Nicola and Trident. Fancy a fight ?
Get real folks, she is an ordinary lass made good. It is simple. She is approachable, doesn't cause so much grief she needs body guards and armed security.
Gary
Nicola does, indeed, have a personal protection officer."
More than one when I saw her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Avoid and build Hadrians wall 100 feet tall to stop anyone coming over the border. Cut all ties with Scotland
I love it, I love it, I love it.
You get a 100 foot mound of earth, Ed Cameron and Nigel Clegg. We get Nicola and Trident. Fancy a fight ?
Get real folks, she is an ordinary lass made good. It is simple. She is approachable, doesn't cause so much grief she needs body guards and armed security.
Gary
Nicola does, indeed, have a personal protection officer.
More than one when I saw her."
Does she really? When I met her, I would have sworn there wasn't one anywhere and I was looking out for exactly that. Very low key.
Did you meet her at a rally, I was at a low key affair.
Gary |
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"Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister’s chauffeur driven car. Suddenly a cow jumps out into the road. They hit it full on and the car comes to a stop.Nicola in her usual jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur :
" You get out and check - you were driving."
The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead.
" You were driving, go and tell the farmer," says Nicola, ”I can’t afford to be blamed for anything.”
The chauffeur walks up the drive to the farmhouse and returns five hours later totally plastered,his hair ruffled and with a big grin on his face.
" My God, what happened to you ?" asks Nicola.
The chauffeur replies : " When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of single malt whisky,The wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me."
" What on earth did you say?" asks Nicola.
" I knocked on the door and when it was answered, I said to them, I'm Nicola Sturgeon’s chauffeur and I've just killed the cow." "
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By *44bertCouple
over a year ago
Inverness |
"Avoid and build Hadrians wall 100 feet tall to stop anyone coming over the border. Cut all ties with Scotland "
You do realize Hadrian's Wall isn't actually in Scotland..? It was hilarious that old dodgy Nige didn't know this either...  |
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By *mmabluTV/TS
over a year ago
upton wirral |
"Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister’s chauffeur driven car. Suddenly a cow jumps out into the road. They hit it full on and the car comes to a stop.Nicola in her usual jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur :
" You get out and check - you were driving."
The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead.
" You were driving, go and tell the farmer," says Nicola, ”I can’t afford to be blamed for anything.”
The chauffeur walks up the drive to the farmhouse and returns five hours later totally plastered,his hair ruffled and with a big grin on his face.
" My God, what happened to you ?" asks Nicola.
The chauffeur replies : " When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of single malt whisky,The wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me."
" What on earth did you say?" asks Nicola.
" I knocked on the door and when it was answered, I said to them, I'm Nicola Sturgeon’s chauffeur and I've just killed the cow." "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sorry I am unable to answer the question as there is no 'act like a monkey and chuck faeces at her' option "
im sure you could stand in front of mirror and do that lol fck you prob do all the time  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nicola Sturgeon has told MSPs she wants Ed Miliband as Prime Minister because “he’s no’ a Tory.
She has a funny way of showing it."
why has she a funny way of showing it ? |
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By *artha_CDTV/TS
over a year ago
St Mellons, Cardiff |
"I think she is really hot, amazing legs and body, strong minded, find that a big turn on, would love to fuck her and lots more "
And she knows how to dress well!
I'd certainly prefer her to DC, EM or NC. On the other hand if NF made me an offer I'd probably vomit!  |
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By *nnyMan
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"I think she is really hot, amazing legs and body, strong minded, find that a big turn on, would love to fuck her and lots more
And she knows how to dress well!
I'd certainly prefer her to DC, EM or NC. On the other hand if NF made me an offer I'd probably vomit! "
With a household income of c £250,000 per annum, she can afford to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think she is really hot, amazing legs and body, strong minded, find that a big turn on, would love to fuck her and lots more
And she knows how to dress well!
I'd certainly prefer her to DC, EM or NC. On the other hand if NF made me an offer I'd probably vomit!
With a household income of c £250,000 per annum, she can afford to."
whats her household income got to do with anything?oh and you never answered my other question further up the thread |
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By *nnyMan
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"I think she is really hot, amazing legs and body, strong minded, find that a big turn on, would love to fuck her and lots more
And she knows how to dress well!
I'd certainly prefer her to DC, EM or NC. On the other hand if NF made me an offer I'd probably vomit!
With a household income of c £250,000 per annum, she can afford to.
whats her household income got to do with anything?oh and you never answered my other question further up the thread"
The fact she can afford to dress well.
What other question? |
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By *nnyMan
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"Nicola Sturgeon has told MSPs she wants Ed Miliband as Prime Minister because “he’s no’ a Tory.
She has a funny way of showing it.
why has she a funny way of showing it ?"
This one?
Trying to reduce the number of Labour MPs won't help Ed become PM, no matter how much Nicola says that's what she wants. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nicola Sturgeon has told MSPs she wants Ed Miliband as Prime Minister because “he’s no’ a Tory.
She has a funny way of showing it.
why has she a funny way of showing it ?
This one?
Trying to reduce the number of Labour MPs won't help Ed become PM, no matter how much Nicola says that's what she wants."
oh so we have all to vote for a labour party who have taken the scottish ppl for granted for years?no thanks |
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By *nnyMan
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"Nicola Sturgeon has told MSPs she wants Ed Miliband as Prime Minister because “he’s no’ a Tory.
She has a funny way of showing it.
why has she a funny way of showing it ?
This one?
Trying to reduce the number of Labour MPs won't help Ed become PM, no matter how much Nicola says that's what she wants.
oh so we have all to vote for a labour party who have taken the scottish ppl for granted for years?no thanks "
You don't HAVE to do anything but if you want rid of Cameron, the only way to do it is to vote Labour. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nicola Sturgeon has told MSPs she wants Ed Miliband as Prime Minister because “he’s no’ a Tory.
She has a funny way of showing it.
why has she a funny way of showing it ?
This one?
Trying to reduce the number of Labour MPs won't help Ed become PM, no matter how much Nicola says that's what she wants.
oh so we have all to vote for a labour party who have taken the scottish ppl for granted for years?no thanks
You don't HAVE to do anything but if you want rid of Cameron, the only way to do it is to vote Labour."
And there speaks a true Murphy supporter. If the opposition parties can gain the confidence of the house, ie cobble together a majority, and vote down the Tory Queen's speech then Cameron is out. So, your last bit about voting labour is utter guff. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nicola Sturgeon has told MSPs she wants Ed Miliband as Prime Minister because “he’s no’ a Tory.
She has a funny way of showing it.
why has she a funny way of showing it ?
This one?
Trying to reduce the number of Labour MPs won't help Ed become PM, no matter how much Nicola says that's what she wants.
oh so we have all to vote for a labour party who have taken the scottish ppl for granted for years?no thanks
You don't HAVE to do anything but if you want rid of Cameron, the only way to do it is to vote Labour."
doesnt really bother me whos pm as red and blue tories are just the same and actually id rather cameron coz milliband is a total plonker |
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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago
Wakefield |
"N
And there speaks a true Murphy supporter. If the opposition parties can gain the confidence of the house, ie cobble together a majority, and vote down the Tory Queen's speech then Cameron is out. So, your last bit about voting labour is utter guff."
Not so David Cameron could form a minority government and carry on as prime minister, he would only have to resign if he lost a vote of no confidence.
In practice however the prime minsiter is expecteed to resign if he does not think he can command the confidence of the house, then if any other party thinks they can command the confidence of the housae they can try.
So it is possible that the SNP could try and gain the support of the Conservatives to enable the SNP to command the confidence of the house.
Very unlikely but democratically possible |
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By *abrina59TV/TS
over a year ago
moved to cuckold land |
Well it seems thst its going to be England who stop Ed Millband becoming Prime Minister
Makex no difference if the Scottish sests are all Labour or all SNP Ed will still fall shory of tory seats in England
So the English voters keep Cameron in power
You cant blame this one on the Scots |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't piss on her if she was on fire
I'm sure she'd lose sleep if she knew "
Who cares.
I'm not going to apologise for having an opinion. I can't stand the woman.
There are some people who probably don't like me. That's entirely up to them. It's their right. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't piss on her if she was on fire
I'm sure she'd lose sleep if she knew
Who cares.
I'm not going to apologise for having an opinion. I can't stand the woman.
There are some people who probably don't like me. That's entirely up to them. It's their right."
Indeed it is. Lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't piss on her if she was on fire
I'm sure she'd lose sleep if she knew
Who cares.
I'm not going to apologise for having an opinion. I can't stand the woman.
There are some people who probably don't like me. That's entirely up to
them. It's their right."
still a fud |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't piss on her if she was on fire
I'm sure she'd lose sleep if she knew
Who cares.
I'm not going to apologise for having an opinion. I can't stand the woman.
There are some people who probably don't like me. That's entirely up to
them. It's their right.
still a fud "
Well she done a good job |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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She's probably a really nice person. Not someone I could agree with if talking politics but if she fancied a swap I wouldn't say no. Not sure if Mrs N would be prepared to take one for the team though. Mr S isn't really her type of what I briefly saw of him. It would have to be a FFM. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bet she was a bully in the school yard.If you got bullied in the school yard from women, you should change your sexual preference to gay and keep voting lib dem"
She has most likely got bigger balls than most men. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think she is really hot, amazing legs and body, strong minded, find that a big turn on, would love to fuck her and lots more "
Bizarrely I agree. I bet she's an animal in bed. A lady who knows what she wants |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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re-build Hadrian's Wall - avoid her - let them have their independence and tell them not to mither us when they go bankrupt. Sick of such a small bit of the UK having such a big say to be honest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"re-build Hadrian's Wall - avoid her - let them have their independence and tell them not to mither us when they go bankrupt. Sick of such a small bit of the UK having such a big say to be honest."
If you have a first past the post system its called democracy.
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By *er himWoman
over a year ago
Essex |
"re-build Hadrian's Wall - avoid her - let them have their independence and tell them not to mither us when they go bankrupt. Sick of such a small bit of the UK having such a big say to be honest."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"re-build Hadrian's Wall - avoid her - let them have their independence and tell them not to mither us when they go bankrupt. Sick of such a small bit of the UK having such a big say to be honest. "
But remember we're all better together?? That's why all the UK party leaders we're tripping over themselfs begging Scotland to stay.
A happy Union of Nations.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If it weren't for the national security issue I would say cut her loose and see how long it is before she is asking for yet more English tax payers money.
While I'm at it the electoral system needs changing, the snp got about 3% of the vote yet got 48 seats, ukip got around 14% and got 1 seat, I don't hold for ukip but how's that fair or rite! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If it weren't for the national security issue I would say cut her loose and see how long it is before she is asking for yet more English tax payers money.
While I'm at it the electoral system needs changing, the snp got about 3% of the vote yet got 48 seats, ukip got around 14% and got 1 seat, I don't hold for ukip but how's that fair or rite!"
Wasn't there a vote on changing FPTP? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If it weren't for the national security issue I would say cut her loose and see how long it is before she is asking for yet more English tax payers money.
While I'm at it the electoral system needs changing, the snp got about 3% of the vote yet got 48 seats, ukip got around 14% and got 1 seat, I don't hold for ukip but how's that fair or rite!
Wasn't there a vote on changing FPTP?"
Don't think it got through the house. No government is going to change it if they think it will diminish there majority, pr would only benefit the smaller party's. |
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"re-build Hadrian's Wall - avoid her - let them have their independence and tell them not to mither us when they go bankrupt. Sick of such a small bit of the UK having such a big say to be honest."
Scotland has roughly 10% of the population of GB, The SNP have around 10% of the seats at Westminster. Can you tell why they have to big a say? seems fair to me.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If it weren't for the national security issue I would say cut her loose and see how long it is before she is asking for yet more English tax payers money.
While I'm at it the electoral system needs changing, the snp got about 3% of the vote yet got 48 seats, ukip got around 14% and got 1 seat, I don't hold for ukip but how's that fair or rite!
Wasn't there a vote on changing FPTP?
Don't think it got through the house. No government is going to change it if they think it will diminish there majority, pr would only benefit the smaller party's."
Well it didn't get through the house, so surely they can't jump up and down that it's not fair.
Have to play by the rules of the game.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"re-build Hadrian's Wall - avoid her - let them have their independence and tell them not to mither us when they go bankrupt. Sick of such a small bit of the UK having such a big say to be honest.Scotland has roughly 10% of the population of GB, The SNP have around 10% of the seats at Westminster. Can you tell why they have to big a say? seems fair to me."
Lol - basically because your Maths is wrong - you need to look at the percentage of VOTES the SNP got - nowhere near 10% !!!! |
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"re-build Hadrian's Wall - avoid her - let them have their independence and tell them not to mither us when they go bankrupt. Sick of such a small bit of the UK having such a big say to be honest.Scotland has roughly 10% of the population of GB, The SNP have around 10% of the seats at Westminster. Can you tell why they have to big a say? seems fair to me.
Lol - basically because your Maths is wrong - you need to look at the percentage of VOTES the SNP got - nowhere near 10% !!!!"
That's not how democracy works. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Various anagrams of her full name - Nicola Ferguson Sturgeon - come up with some amusing combinations such as:
ungracefulness giro toon; color sergeant fungus ion; Nuclear fusion gorge snot; nectareous sinful gorgon.
There's many more courtesy of on-line anagram makers.
In answer to the OP, I'd make every effort to not be in the same room as her. It would take me all my time not to throttle her. I reckon she should be sent to Berlin as a doppleganger for Iron Knickers Merkel.
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