FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Married or Not?!?!
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"Doesn't bother me. What others do is their business, not mine. " I guess some people just dont value their marriage/relationship as much as others | |||
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"Doesn't bother me. What others do is their business, not mine. I guess some people just dont value their marriage/relationship as much as others" That really isn't my concern | |||
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"Doesn't bother me. What others do is their business, not mine. I guess some people just dont value their marriage/relationship as much as others That really isn't my concern" | |||
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"Doesn't bother me. What others do is their business, not mine. I guess some people just dont value their marriage/relationship as much as others That really isn't my concern " Cool | |||
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"Doesn't bother me. What others do is their business, not mine. I guess some people just dont value their marriage/relationship as much as others" Or doesn't get satisfied at home?. | |||
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"Doesn't bother me. What others do is their business, not mine. " | |||
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"No I'm not bothered at all Because I like bareback sex and most married men on here get no sex so it's nicer for me than meeting the real players And they don't get clingy either " Bit of a sweeping statement re amount of sex married men get with their partner, may be your experience but not for us. | |||
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"No I'm not bothered at all Because I like bareback sex and most married men on here get no sex so it's nicer for me than meeting the real players And they don't get clingy either Bit of a sweeping statement re amount of sex married men get with their partner, may be your experience but not for us. " Fair enough It is my experience and it has been for over a decade on sites like this | |||
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"Doesn't bother me. What others do is their business, not mine. I guess some people just dont value their marriage/relationship as much as others" So if sex with single swingers is just nsa sex Why can't it be exactly the same for people who don't tell their partners Because what they don't know can't hurt them And it's not like they're actually having an affair So... No problem really | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us." We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. " I agree with you Ask these smug people in a few years time when one of them goes off sex See how they feel then | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. I agree with you Ask these smug people in a few years time when one of them goes off sex See how they feel then " Smug? | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. I agree with you Ask these smug people in a few years time when one of them goes off sex See how they feel then " Lol its not about being smug actually its about respect and morals love | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. I agree with you Ask these smug people in a few years time when one of them goes off sex See how they feel then Smug? " Yes smug We have lots off sex readily on tap so it won't ever effect us Smug | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. I agree with you Ask these smug people in a few years time when one of them goes off sex See how they feel then Lol its not about being smug actually its about respect and morals love" I have lots of respect for people I fuck Married or not | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. I agree with you Ask these smug people in a few years time when one of them goes off sex See how they feel then Lol its not about being smug actually its about respect and morals love" Ive been in that situation after 20 years of marriage and chose to leave before it got that far. We are not smug or judgemental so please dont throw those words around and think we dont understand real life | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. " I was married...very happily for a long time...that was until my ex wife went off sex...i didn't cheat...but i did get my gratification elsewhere...until she found out !!!....it ultimately ended up in us getting divorced and costing us both a lot of money and heartache...me my advice is if anyone cherishes or loves there partner/wife..then stop...i only wish i could turn back the clock...one thing i do know is sex isn't worth happiness...and yes its cheating no matter how you look at it...and theres never any reason to cheat on the person you profess to love and cherish...i for one being a single man now...would never ever knowingly meet a married person...and yes i've had the chances to | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. I agree with you Ask these smug people in a few years time when one of them goes off sex See how they feel then Smug? Yes smug We have lots off sex readily on tap so it won't ever effect us Smug " I don't have sex on tap and I wouldn't knowingly go with an attached man. What's my label? | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. I agree with you Ask these smug people in a few years time when one of them goes off sex See how they feel then Smug? Yes smug We have lots off sex readily on tap so it won't ever effect us Smug I don't have sex on tap and I wouldn't knowingly go with an attached man. What's my label? " I'm not biting | |||
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"We wont meet attached people. It caused us grief before when a 'single' man we had arranged a meet with was followed to our place by his wife, who caused a scene on our doorstep to which a lot of our neighbours were witness to." I had this once I told her straight If you were giving him sex he wouldn't be here would he Now p#as off from my home | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. " | |||
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"No I'm not bothered at all Because I like bareback sex and most married men on here get no sex so it's nicer for me than meeting the real players And they don't get clingy either " think youll find they have more reason than being married to avoid being clingy with some people. | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. I was married...very happily for a long time...that was until my ex wife went off sex...i didn't cheat...but i did get my gratification elsewhere...until she found out !!!....it ultimately ended up in us getting divorced and costing us both a lot of money and heartache...me my advice is if anyone cherishes or loves there partner/wife..then stop...i only wish i could turn back the clock...one thing i do know is sex isn't worth happiness...and yes its cheating no matter how you look at it...and theres never any reason to cheat on the person you profess to love and cherish...i for one being a single man now...would never ever knowingly meet a married person...and yes i've had the chances to " Nice to hear somebody admit to their wrong doing.I was on the other end of it with my ex and its not nice. m | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us. We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us " Ditto. The number of people in this thread who leave their morals at the door when swinging is astounding. The two things are compatible you know... | |||
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"What about married women who are cheating and shod business is it of anyone else's. You don't no the reasons why someone may or may not be cheating so its not of anyone business " There can be no reason to hurt the person you love or cherish...the only person your fooling is yourself..and excusing tbh | |||
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"No I'm not bothered at all Because I like bareback sex and most married men on here get no sex so it's nicer for me than meeting the real players And they don't get clingy either Ok Well I meet several regular men all of whom have been married for over a decade And I only meet them for sex And they're not clingy Never ask me who else I meet think youll find they have more reason than being married to avoid being clingy with some people. " | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us. We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us Ditto. The number of people in this thread who leave their morals at the door when swinging is astounding. " as are the amount of people who make assumptions and judgements about others....... | |||
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"What about married women who are cheating and shod business is it of anyone else's. You don't no the reasons why someone may or may not be cheating so its not of anyone business There can be no reason to hurt the person you love or cherish...the only person your fooling is yourself..and excusing tbh " Did I say Im married? ???? | |||
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"What about married women who are cheating and shod business is it of anyone else's. You don't no the reasons why someone may or may not be cheating so its not of anyone business There can be no reason to hurt the person you love or cherish...the only person your fooling is yourself..and excusing tbh Did I say Im married? ???? " Nope i was quoting your comment !!! | |||
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"What about married women who are cheating and shod business is it of anyone else's. You don't no the reasons why someone may or may not be cheating so its not of anyone business " People who fuck others have the right to make it their business simply because it affects their decision-making! | |||
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"What about married women who are cheating and shod business is it of anyone else's. You don't no the reasons why someone may or may not be cheating so its not of anyone business There can be no reason to hurt the person you love or cherish...the only person your fooling is yourself..and excusing tbh Did I say Im married? ???? Nope i was quoting your comment !!!" Hehehe fair enough x | |||
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"What about married women who are cheating and shod business is it of anyone else's. You don't no the reasons why someone may or may not be cheating so its not of anyone business People who fuck others have the right to make it their business simply because it affects their decision-making!" I'd like to hope any meets I get would be honest Im sure they won't be | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us. We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us Ditto. The number of people in this thread who leave their morals at the door when swinging is astounding. The two things are compatible you know... " I am a very moral person actually Ask my vicar And I'm not a swinger Simply a slut lol | |||
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"This thread is better then the soaps " In the soaps they're always having sex wirh everyone else It reflects real life | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us. We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us Ditto. The number of people in this thread who leave their morals at the door when swinging is astounding. The two things are compatible you know... I am a very moral person actually Ask my vicar And I'm not a swinger Simply a slut lol " Nah..if you would risk breaking up someones marriage for sex..then theres no morals involved there from what i can see | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol " And some very desperate people that would fuck anything | |||
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"Bareback or cheating seems to be the most judgemental I for 1 love bareback but I know this is something that is judged appon " I see why you dont meet many people then lol | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol And some very desperate people that would fuck anything " well said that man, totally agree with you. | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol And some very desperate people that would fuck anything " Excuse me but I don't fuck anyone I am choosy who I have fun with | |||
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"What about married women who are cheating and shod business is it of anyone else's. You don't no the reasons why someone may or may not be cheating so its not of anyone business People who fuck others have the right to make it their business simply because it affects their decision-making! I'd like to hope any meets I get would be honest Im sure they won't be " I'm sure some are . Admittedly the crux of the matter is that we all make choices upon the info we receive, hoping it's the truth. I rely on my pretty accurate gut instinct/intuition. | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol And some very desperate people that would fuck anything " If you mean me I'm neither desperate Nor will I fuck all who ask So ner ner Lol | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us. We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us Ditto. The number of people in this thread who leave their morals at the door when swinging is astounding. The two things are compatible you know... I am a very moral person actually Ask my vicar And I'm not a swinger Simply a slut lol Nah..if you would risk breaking up someones marriage for sex..then theres no morals involved there from what i can see " There's no risk for my I'm single Doh!!!! | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol " Love how this is thrown around whenever this debate comes up, on here or in my inbox. We all judge. Right from wrong forms the very basis of our society. Who hasn't picked up a newspaper and judged a person for beating someone up or abandoning their kids? People just don't like it when it's their own actions warranting judgement. | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol " | |||
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"Bareback or cheating seems to be the most judgemental I for 1 love bareback but I know this is something that is judged appon " They APPEAR judgemental cos they don't agree with your life choices? | |||
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"What about married women who are cheating and shod business is it of anyone else's. You don't no the reasons why someone may or may not be cheating so its not of anyone business People who fuck others have the right to make it their business simply because it affects their decision-making! I'd like to hope any meets I get would be honest Im sure they won't be I'm sure some are . Admittedly the crux of the matter is that we all make choices upon the info we receive, hoping it's the truth. I rely on my pretty accurate gut instinct/intuition." Me too some times fuck up and sometimes just fuck lol | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol Love how this is thrown around whenever this debate comes up, on here or in my inbox. We all judge. Right from wrong forms the very basis of our society. Who hasn't picked up a newspaper and judged a person for beating someone up or abandoning their kids? People just don't like it when it's their own actions warranting judgement." I'm very liberal I judge almost nobody on anything they do And my friends will tell you this | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol And some very desperate people that would fuck anything If you mean me I'm neither desperate Nor will I fuck all who ask So ner ner Lol " And ditto if you mean me | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol And some very desperate people that would fuck anything If you mean me I'm neither desperate Nor will I fuck all who ask So ner ner Lol And ditto if you mean me " I did'nt mean anyone in general..read your comments lol ner ner | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol Love how this is thrown around whenever this debate comes up, on here or in my inbox. We all judge. Right from wrong forms the very basis of our society. Who hasn't picked up a newspaper and judged a person for beating someone up or abandoning their kids? People just don't like it when it's their own actions warranting judgement. I'm very liberal I judge almost nobody on anything they do And my friends will tell you this " I think its good your honest then the good folk of fab can make an informed decision xx | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol Love how this is thrown around whenever this debate comes up, on here or in my inbox. We all judge. Right from wrong forms the very basis of our society. Who hasn't picked up a newspaper and judged a person for beating someone up or abandoning their kids? People just don't like it when it's their own actions warranting judgement. I'm very liberal I judge almost nobody on anything they do And my friends will tell you this " 'almost nobody' | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol Love how this is thrown around whenever this debate comes up, on here or in my inbox. We all judge. Right from wrong forms the very basis of our society. Who hasn't picked up a newspaper and judged a person for beating someone up or abandoning their kids? People just don't like it when it's their own actions warranting judgement. I'm very liberal I judge almost nobody on anything they do And my friends will tell you this 'almost nobody' " Ok murderers And people who inflicted violence upon others That's about it if you must know That it Just two things Happy now? ?? | |||
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"For me if I know the female is married and playing behind the husbands back....will never play ever...I wouldn't like to be the guy...so therefore I wouldn't disrespect him that way. Don't get me wrong... I have like thought about it...but I think swinging is not about cheating. Now if the partner is aware of the entire arrangement and this can be verified...then that's different. I guess I'm just weird...." Nah your not weird..you just have morals and standands..like any caring human being would have | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol Love how this is thrown around whenever this debate comes up, on here or in my inbox. We all judge. Right from wrong forms the very basis of our society. Who hasn't picked up a newspaper and judged a person for beating someone up or abandoning their kids? People just don't like it when it's their own actions warranting judgement. I'm very liberal I judge almost nobody on anything they do And my friends will tell you this " Liberal doesn't mean 'doesn't judge'. In fact most liberals I know actively seek to surround themselves with honest people. | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol Love how this is thrown around whenever this debate comes up, on here or in my inbox. We all judge. Right from wrong forms the very basis of our society. Who hasn't picked up a newspaper and judged a person for beating someone up or abandoning their kids? People just don't like it when it's their own actions warranting judgement. I'm very liberal I judge almost nobody on anything they do And my friends will tell you this 'almost nobody' Ok murderers And people who inflicted violence upon others That's about it if you must know That it Just two things Happy now? ?? " Exactly as I said We all judge | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol Love how this is thrown around whenever this debate comes up, on here or in my inbox. We all judge. Right from wrong forms the very basis of our society. Who hasn't picked up a newspaper and judged a person for beating someone up or abandoning their kids? People just don't like it when it's their own actions warranting judgement. I'm very liberal I judge almost nobody on anything they do And my friends will tell you this I think its good your honest then the good folk of fab can make an informed decision xx" This is true And my message box is full to bursting every day of the week So clearly the majority like me lol And others like me | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol Love how this is thrown around whenever this debate comes up, on here or in my inbox. We all judge. Right from wrong forms the very basis of our society. Who hasn't picked up a newspaper and judged a person for beating someone up or abandoning their kids? People just don't like it when it's their own actions warranting judgement. I'm very liberal I judge almost nobody on anything they do And my friends will tell you this 'almost nobody' Ok murderers And people who inflicted violence upon others That's about it if you must know That it Just two things Happy now? ?? Exactly as I said We all judge " Fair enough But not much | |||
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"There are some very judgemental people on here lol Love how this is thrown around whenever this debate comes up, on here or in my inbox. We all judge. Right from wrong forms the very basis of our society. Who hasn't picked up a newspaper and judged a person for beating someone up or abandoning their kids? People just don't like it when it's their own actions warranting judgement. I'm very liberal I judge almost nobody on anything they do And my friends will tell you this Liberal doesn't mean 'doesn't judge'. In fact most liberals I know actively seek to surround themselves with honest people." | |||
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" Im very judgemental on cheating i agree...i saw and experienced it first hand what it can do....and welcome back " I have also experienced it firsthand. And rather than assume he was an awful cheating person who must hate me we talked it through, dissected everything. And guess what? These things are not usually one sided, they aren't black and white. Every couple has their own unique set of circumstances and I truly believe that if a couple are meant to be together they will survive. ....anything. cheating actually made our relationship stronger. It took that for me to take a good look at myself and my own faults rather than point my finger at the "cheating bastard" I'm not saying this is the same for others but it is why I get angry at those that blanket judge. Nothing wrong with judging when you have all the facts. It's the assumptions and blanket judgements that I have a problem with. And no I'm not sticking up or condoning the behaviour of those that cheat it's just not my place to tell them what they should or shouldn't be doing. And yes thank you, I do have morals and standards too. | |||
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"We're married,just not to each other,our respective spouse's don't want / can't have sex. So unless you are actually in that situation don't judge anyone." If the other partners know then fine theres not a problem...but if they don't then there is..and its only my opinion | |||
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" Im very judgemental on cheating i agree...i saw and experienced it first hand what it can do....and welcome back I have also experienced it firsthand. And rather than assume he was an awful cheating person who must hate me we talked it through, dissected everything. And guess what? These things are not usually one sided, they aren't black and white. Every couple has their own unique set of circumstances and I truly believe that if a couple are meant to be together they will survive. ....anything. cheating actually made our relationship stronger. It took that for me to take a good look at myself and my own faults rather than point my finger at the "cheating bastard" I'm not saying this is the same for others but it is why I get angry at those that blanket judge. Nothing wrong with judging when you have all the facts. It's the assumptions and blanket judgements that I have a problem with. And no I'm not sticking up or condoning the behaviour of those that cheat it's just not my place to tell them what they should or shouldn't be doing. And yes thank you, I do have morals and standards too. " Agreed ...and your hubby knows what you do..so no one can judge you at all...but still given what you have been through would you honestly meet a married guy behind his wife's back ? | |||
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"We're married,just not to each other,our respective spouse's don't want / can't have sex. So unless you are actually in that situation don't judge anyone." That's not really how it works. I can judge all sorts of people without being in their situation. Why are you so special? | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. " This | |||
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"Yes it bothers me. Do unto others and all that...." Same for us - cheaters are a no go. | |||
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"No I'm not bothered at all Because I like bareback sex and most married men on here get no sex so it's nicer for me than meeting the real players And they don't get clingy either " Whilst I don't want to get into a row about this, you say you like bareback sex (who doesn't?), you also say that 'married men don't get sex at home'. What about bareback sex with all the married guys who have some sex at home, isn't that risky for all concerned? | |||
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"No I'm not bothered at all Because I like bareback sex and most married men on here get no sex so it's nicer for me than meeting the real players And they don't get clingy either think youll find they have more reason than being married to avoid being clingy with some people. " | |||
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"Shagging about behind your partners back and using swinging as a cover only helps to enforce the stigma surrounding the scene. As does anyone who knowingly helps them to do it. If you're here and your partner doesn't know you're not swinging you're cheating. As for the "I'm not satisfied at home" bollocks try have some damn respect for your partner and talk to them. What's going to be worse "Look love... You know I love you but, We need to talk" Or "I found the messages.... We need to talk" " Completely agree. We will never meet anyone who is cheating on a partner. | |||
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"What about married women who are cheating and shod business is it of anyone else's. You don't no the reasons why someone may or may not be cheating so its not of anyone business People who fuck others have the right to make it their business simply because it affects their decision-making!" | |||
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"Yes it bothers me. Do unto others and all that...." | |||
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"Shagging about behind your partners back and using swinging as a cover only helps to enforce the stigma surrounding the scene. As does anyone who knowingly helps them to do it. If you're here and your partner doesn't know you're not swinging you're cheating. As for the "I'm not satisfied at home" bollocks try have some damn respect for your partner and talk to them. What's going to be worse Now THATS judgemental saying that someone who shags a married Bloke/Bird is adding to the stigma surrounding swinging Gimp "Look love... You know I love you but, We need to talk" Or "I found the messages.... We need to talk" " | |||
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" Im very judgemental on cheating i agree...i saw and experienced it first hand what it can do....and welcome back I have also experienced it firsthand. And rather than assume he was an awful cheating person who must hate me we talked it through, dissected everything. And guess what? These things are not usually one sided, they aren't black and white. Every couple has their own unique set of circumstances and I truly believe that if a couple are meant to be together they will survive. ....anything. cheating actually made our relationship stronger. It took that for me to take a good look at myself and my own faults rather than point my finger at the "cheating bastard" I'm not saying this is the same for others but it is why I get angry at those that blanket judge. Nothing wrong with judging when you have all the facts. It's the assumptions and blanket judgements that I have a problem with. And no I'm not sticking up or condoning the behaviour of those that cheat it's just not my place to tell them what they should or shouldn't be doing. And yes thank you, I do have morals and standards too. Agreed ...and your hubby knows what you do..so no one can judge you at all...but still given what you have been through would you honestly meet a married guy behind his wife's back ? " i Probably have but as i said earlier it really is none of my business. Having said that not many married men who fit what I'm looking for are able to book a hotel room for a week night! | |||
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"I don't personally want to meet a guy that is cheating behind "her" back. I am married myself and he knows, he also plays. So, do I fit in the cheating category??" permissive cheating with reservations? | |||
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"I don't personally want to meet a guy that is cheating behind "her" back. I am married myself and he knows, he also plays. So, do I fit in the cheating category??" In my opinion no because you are not deceiving him. | |||
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"We're married,just not to each other,our respective spouse's don't want / can't have sex. So unless you are actually in that situation don't judge anyone." Well said xx | |||
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" Im very judgemental on cheating i agree...i saw and experienced it first hand what it can do....and welcome back I have also experienced it firsthand. And rather than assume he was an awful cheating person who must hate me we talked it through, dissected everything. And guess what? These things are not usually one sided, they aren't black and white. Every couple has their own unique set of circumstances and I truly believe that if a couple are meant to be together they will survive. ....anything. cheating actually made our relationship stronger. It took that for me to take a good look at myself and my own faults rather than point my finger at the "cheating bastard" I'm not saying this is the same for others but it is why I get angry at those that blanket judge. Nothing wrong with judging when you have all the facts. It's the assumptions and blanket judgements that I have a problem with. And no I'm not sticking up or condoning the behaviour of those that cheat it's just not my place to tell them what they should or shouldn't be doing. And yes thank you, I do have morals and standards too. " This is exactly what I was trying to say you just put it better | |||
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"We are a genuine couple and therefore have a couples profile...what is quite disturbing is the sheer volume of people that are either married or attached looking for 'secret meets'. Now we are no way judgemental but would never knowingly meet someone who was attached and their partner did not know. I understand its a choice and an adult site but surely the risks far outway any sexual gratification. Does this issue bother anyone else? " Yes because IMO true swingers are honest and upfront and seek their pleasure but not at the risk of hurting someone..secret meets are cheating..but the guys that mail me and say "I have to be honest I'm married" are being hypocritical as how can they be honest to some they have never met, yet not honest to their wife/partner...I will not play with anyone knowingly married or cheating....that is not being judgemental of the individual but of the way they are behaving | |||
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"I love the way the OP says they are not judgemental & then goes on to judge all married people playing 'alone'" In their first post? They are not condemning (judging) anyone but they are assessing (judging) them in relation to their own desires. To this end they have EVERY right. | |||
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"Shagging about behind your partners back and using swinging as a cover only helps to enforce the stigma surrounding the scene. As does anyone who knowingly helps them to do it. If you're here and your partner doesn't know you're not swinging you're cheating. As for the "I'm not satisfied at home" bollocks try have some damn respect for your partner and talk to them. What's going to be worse "Look love... You know I love you but, We need to talk" Or "I found the messages.... We need to talk" " | |||
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"I had an experience a few weeks ago now...my phone went off early in the morning...it was from a young lady part of a couple id meet and played with regularly and shes beautiful with a lovely sexy body...she was on a night out with the girls...she asked me to come pick her up and fuck her in the back of my car and i wont tell ---- her partner...and i know most guys would had jumped at the opportunity...do you know what my response was even though we had met and played before...sorry i like you as a couple...i wouldn't want to hurt your partner...and tbh...i did and have lost quite a bit of respect for her over it " | |||
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"My moral argument in favour of meeting married people is simply this Most of my friends know I'm a slut on swinging sites, 80% or even more and the rest don't know because they've not asked Now most swingers do not tell their families colleagues neighbours or friends In fact they lie about their behaviour and whereabouts I don't So my moral point is this Whose more of a liar? Married people who lie to just one more person than the rest of you? " I think that - personally - it's worse to lie to someone you have promised to love, to cherish, to not lie to, than a bunch of strangers. | |||
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"We will not knowingly meet a married/attached Man or woman playing without their partner's consent. People throw many reasons and excuses at you trying to justify their actions but it just isn't something I feel comfortable with. - Amy. x" This | |||
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"Doesn't bother me. What others do is their business, not mine. I guess some people just dont value their marriage/relationship as much as others" You stated in your original post that 'you are no way judgemental' Yet here you are judging others with your next post. What others do is no concern of mine. If you dont want to meet married people don't. | |||
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"Doesn't bother me. What others do is their business, not mine. I guess some people just dont value their marriage/relationship as much as others You stated in your original post that 'you are no way judgemental' Yet here you are judging others with your next post. What others do is no concern of mine. If you dont want to meet married people don't. " | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us. We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us Ditto. The number of people in this thread who leave their morals at the door when swinging is astounding. as are the amount of people who make assumptions and judgements about others......." It's called 'cheating' . There's no assumptions in there! In this context it means fucking someone without your partner knowing. If that floats your boat knock yourself out. Just be honest about it so that other folks can make an informed choice. | |||
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" I was married...very happily for a long time...that was until my ex wife went off sex...i didn't cheat...but i did get my gratification elsewhere...until she found out !!!....it ultimately ended up in us getting divorced and costing us both a lot of money and heartache...me my advice is if anyone cherishes or loves there partner/wife..then stop...i only wish i could turn back the clock...one thing i do know is sex isn't worth happiness...and yes its cheating no matter how you look at it...and theres never any reason to cheat on the person you profess to love and cherish...i for one being a single man now...would never ever knowingly meet a married person...and yes i've had the chances to " Really respect you for being open and honest here | |||
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"We wont meet attached people. It caused us grief before when a 'single' man we had arranged a meet with was followed to our place by his wife, who caused a scene on our doorstep to which a lot of our neighbours were witness to. I had this once I told her straight If you were giving him sex he wouldn't be here would he Now p#as off from my home " Classy... | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us. We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us Ditto. The number of people in this thread who leave their morals at the door when swinging is astounding. as are the amount of people who make assumptions and judgements about others....... It's called 'cheating' . There's no assumptions in there! In this context it means fucking someone without your partner knowing. If that floats your boat knock yourself out. Just be honest about it so that other folks can make an informed choice. " | |||
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"We don't believe calling yourself a swinger is a get out of jail free card for infidelity" It is not swinging...it is cheating | |||
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"We wont meet attached people. It caused us grief before when a 'single' man we had arranged a meet with was followed to our place by his wife, who caused a scene on our doorstep to which a lot of our neighbours were witness to. I had this once I told her straight If you were giving him sex he wouldn't be here would he Now p#as off from my home Classy..." Oh I'm classy all right But I'm not an idiot And I won't be told what or who I can see in my own home | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us. We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us Ditto. The number of people in this thread who leave their morals at the door when swinging is astounding. as are the amount of people who make assumptions and judgements about others....... It's called 'cheating' . There's no assumptions in there! In this context it means fucking someone without your partner knowing. If that floats your boat knock yourself out. Just be honest about it so that other folks can make an informed choice. " The assumption is that people who meet married people have no morals. I am neither a cheater nor a liar. Another 2 assumptions there. | |||
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"Surely sleeping with anyone when you are married with or without the other knowing is cheating??" Think about it... If you cheat at cards or an exam, do others know? They may get to know but the idea behind cheating is that the relevant people don't know. | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us. We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us Ditto. The number of people in this thread who leave their morals at the door when swinging is astounding. as are the amount of people who make assumptions and judgements about others....... It's called 'cheating' . There's no assumptions in there! In this context it means fucking someone without your partner knowing. If that floats your boat knock yourself out. Just be honest about it so that other folks can make an informed choice. The assumption is that people who meet married people have no morals. I am neither a cheater nor a liar. Another 2 assumptions there." Not sure I suggested any such thing? | |||
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"I'm married in a sexless relationship. I'm upfront every time I meet someone. Have my own reasons to swing and suspect my wife knows why I do. For me it's just sex. " I agree, doesn't mean u don't love ur partner, means u have needs like everybody. sorry but im guilty of seeing a married man but its ONLY sex. not an affair so no commitment or attachment | |||
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"Each to their own but we block anyone that openly admits to be cheating on their partner. We both value "fidelity" and would hate it to done to us. We do exactly the same as we wouldnt want it done to us Ditto. The number of people in this thread who leave their morals at the door when swinging is astounding. as are the amount of people who make assumptions and judgements about others....... It's called 'cheating' . There's no assumptions in there! In this context it means fucking someone without your partner knowing. If that floats your boat knock yourself out. Just be honest about it so that other folks can make an informed choice. The assumption is that people who meet married people have no morals. I am neither a cheater nor a liar. Another 2 assumptions there. Not sure I suggested any such thing?" I didn't say you did. I was replying to someone else! | |||
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" I was married...very happily for a long time...that was until my ex wife went off sex...i didn't cheat...but i did get my gratification elsewhere...until she found out !!!....it ultimately ended up in us getting divorced and costing us both a lot of money and heartache...me my advice is if anyone cherishes or loves there partner/wife..then stop...i only wish i could turn back the clock...one thing i do know is sex isn't worth happiness...and yes its cheating no matter how you look at it...and theres never any reason to cheat on the person you profess to love and cherish...i for one being a single man now...would never ever knowingly meet a married person...and yes i've had the chances to Really respect you for being open and honest here " That is so well put, well written and heartfelt that you can't help but see your point of _iew... On the other hand there are many... And I mean many people who are in oppressive, unloving relationships, with little or little of the type of sex they need. What happens is they spen 20 years playing the good wife, raising kids who grow up and become less of a distraction, but without a skill or one that is so unused and out of the game or in an untenable situation... E.g. Aged dying parent, dragging on for 3 years... They need to feel something, they can't leave due to circumstance and are deeply unhappy... Que many saying just leave... I can think of many situations where this is not possible... At somepoint the invisible prison of their marriage vows become meaningless... But most people will always see the world from their point of _iew... So they look down on those that don't conform to their high standards... No matter how much good someone has done for there neighbour, local community or mankind.... They cheated! Totally outdated concept! | |||
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"Yes, because if they cheat on their partner they're just not the kind of person I want to be friendly with. They clearly have very different values to myself. Also prefer people who are prepared to be honest about what they want - which includes honesty toward people that they are in a relationship with. If they're not honest people, I don't want them in my bed." | |||
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"We don't believe calling yourself a swinger is a get out of jail free card for infidelity It is not swinging...it is cheating" | |||
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"Getting a phone call from an outraged 'other half' must be a real pain...especially if you were 'sure' they seemed single..." I've had it loads of times And belive me They rarely call me back I am Welsh and have a firey temper lol | |||
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" I agree, doesn't mean u don't love ur partner, means u have needs like everybody. sorry but im guilty of seeing a married man but its ONLY sex. not an affair so no commitment or attachment " If it's 'just sex' and not really an affair, why doesn't he tell his partner? I thought that the whole idea of getting married is because you loved and cared about someone so much that you wanted to make a life long commitment to them. Doing something that you know would hurt them seems counterproductive to the state of marriage. I guess you can either hurt them in the short term and leave, or hurt them in the long term and cheat. Either way there's hurt. But one resolves quicker than the other. | |||
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" I was married...very happily for a long time...that was until my ex wife went off sex...i didn't cheat...but i did get my gratification elsewhere...until she found out !!!....it ultimately ended up in us getting divorced and costing us both a lot of money and heartache...me my advice is if anyone cherishes or loves there partner/wife..then stop...i only wish i could turn back the clock...one thing i do know is sex isn't worth happiness...and yes its cheating no matter how you look at it...and theres never any reason to cheat on the person you profess to love and cherish...i for one being a single man now...would never ever knowingly meet a married person...and yes i've had the chances to Really respect you for being open and honest here That is so well put, well written and heartfelt that you can't help but see your point of _iew... On the other hand there are many... And I mean many people who are in oppressive, unloving relationships, with little or little of the type of sex they need. What happens is they spen 20 years playing the good wife, raising kids who grow up and become less of a distraction, but without a skill or one that is so unused and out of the game or in an untenable situation... E.g. Aged dying parent, dragging on for 3 years... They need to feel something, they can't leave due to circumstance and are deeply unhappy... Que many saying just leave... I can think of many situations where this is not possible... At somepoint the invisible prison of their marriage vows become meaningless... But most people will always see the world from their point of _iew... So they look down on those that don't conform to their high standards... No matter how much good someone has done for there neighbour, local community or mankind.... They cheated! Totally outdated concept!" You can leave...i did i was married for 30 years we got married at 18..we were together from the age of 14...to me its an excuse..and tbh there cant be any excuse for cheating...because if you love and cherish someone..you put up with there failings..good or bad..like i've said if i could had done things differently i would had | |||
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" I agree, doesn't mean u don't love ur partner, means u have needs like everybody. sorry but im guilty of seeing a married man but its ONLY sex. not an affair so no commitment or attachment If it's 'just sex' and not really an affair, why doesn't he tell his partner? I thought that the whole idea of getting married is because you loved and cared about someone so much that you wanted to make a life long commitment to them. Doing something that you know would hurt them seems counterproductive to the state of marriage. I guess you can either hurt them in the short term and leave, or hurt them in the long term and cheat. Either way there's hurt. But one resolves quicker than the other." No one's hurt if they don't know | |||
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"Getting a phone call from an outraged 'other half' must be a real pain...especially if you were 'sure' they seemed single... I've had it loads of times And belive me They rarely call me back I am Welsh and have a firey temper lol " Believe Fiery | |||
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" I agree, doesn't mean u don't love ur partner, means u have needs like everybody. sorry but im guilty of seeing a married man but its ONLY sex. not an affair so no commitment or attachment If it's 'just sex' and not really an affair, why doesn't he tell his partner? I thought that the whole idea of getting married is because you loved and cared about someone so much that you wanted to make a life long commitment to them. Doing something that you know would hurt them seems counterproductive to the state of marriage. I guess you can either hurt them in the short term and leave, or hurt them in the long term and cheat. Either way there's hurt. But one resolves quicker than the other. No one's hurt if they don't know " You think they don't know? That's laughable. I knew for years that my mother was having an affair. So did my father. I also knew that my partner - of nearly five years - cheated on me five times. And I didn't even live with him. If you think they don't know, you must think they are stupid. They do often know. They just are scared of losing the person that they want to be with. | |||
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" I agree, doesn't mean u don't love ur partner, means u have needs like everybody. sorry but im guilty of seeing a married man but its ONLY sex. not an affair so no commitment or attachment If it's 'just sex' and not really an affair, why doesn't he tell his partner? I thought that the whole idea of getting married is because you loved and cared about someone so much that you wanted to make a life long commitment to them. Doing something that you know would hurt them seems counterproductive to the state of marriage. I guess you can either hurt them in the short term and leave, or hurt them in the long term and cheat. Either way there's hurt. But one resolves quicker than the other. No one's hurt if they don't know " The truth always comes out in the end...the only person your kidding is yourself and the cheat your playing with | |||
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" I agree, doesn't mean u don't love ur partner, means u have needs like everybody. sorry but im guilty of seeing a married man but its ONLY sex. not an affair so no commitment or attachment If it's 'just sex' and not really an affair, why doesn't he tell his partner? I thought that the whole idea of getting married is because you loved and cared about someone so much that you wanted to make a life long commitment to them. Doing something that you know would hurt them seems counterproductive to the state of marriage. I guess you can either hurt them in the short term and leave, or hurt them in the long term and cheat. Either way there's hurt. But one resolves quicker than the other." I cant answer that tbh. he obviously knows if he tells her then it could end the marriage, then again if she finds out it could still end the marriage. either way he probably thinks best to stay quiet, plus I do personally always think u cant totally love ur partner if ur having sex elsewhere.. I don't discuss their personal lives with them. | |||
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" I was married...very happily for a long time...that was until my ex wife went off sex...i didn't cheat...but i did get my gratification elsewhere...until she found out !!!....it ultimately ended up in us getting divorced and costing us both a lot of money and heartache...me my advice is if anyone cherishes or loves there partner/wife..then stop...i only wish i could turn back the clock...one thing i do know is sex isn't worth happiness...and yes its cheating no matter how you look at it...and theres never any reason to cheat on the person you profess to love and cherish...i for one being a single man now...would never ever knowingly meet a married person...and yes i've had the chances to Really respect you for being open and honest here That is so well put, well written and heartfelt that you can't help but see your point of _iew... On the other hand there are many... And I mean many people who are in oppressive, unloving relationships, with little or little of the type of sex they need. What happens is they spen 20 years playing the good wife, raising kids who grow up and become less of a distraction, but without a skill or one that is so unused and out of the game or in an untenable situation... E.g. Aged dying parent, dragging on for 3 years... They need to feel something, they can't leave due to circumstance and are deeply unhappy... Que many saying just leave... I can think of many situations where this is not possible... At somepoint the invisible prison of their marriage vows become meaningless... But most people will always see the world from their point of _iew... So they look down on those that don't conform to their high standards... No matter how much good someone has done for there neighbour, local community or mankind.... They cheated! Totally outdated concept! You can leave...i did i was married for 30 years we got married at 18..we were together from the age of 14...to me its an excuse..and tbh there cant be any excuse for cheating...because if you love and cherish someone..you put up with there failings..good or bad..like i've said if i could had done things differently i would had " And if you did ever care about them the best thing you can do is own up and leave them... | |||
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" I agree, doesn't mean u don't love ur partner, means u have needs like everybody. sorry but im guilty of seeing a married man but its ONLY sex. not an affair so no commitment or attachment If it's 'just sex' and not really an affair, why doesn't he tell his partner? I thought that the whole idea of getting married is because you loved and cared about someone so much that you wanted to make a life long commitment to them. Doing something that you know would hurt them seems counterproductive to the state of marriage. I guess you can either hurt them in the short term and leave, or hurt them in the long term and cheat. Either way there's hurt. But one resolves quicker than the other. No one's hurt if they don't know You think they don't know? That's laughable. I knew for years that my mother was having an affair. So did my father. I also knew that my partner - of nearly five years - cheated on me five times. And I didn't even live with him. If you think they don't know, you must think they are stupid. They do often know. They just are scared of losing the person that they want to be with." | |||
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" I agree, doesn't mean u don't love ur partner, means u have needs like everybody. sorry but im guilty of seeing a married man but its ONLY sex. not an affair so no commitment or attachment If it's 'just sex' and not really an affair, why doesn't he tell his partner? I thought that the whole idea of getting married is because you loved and cared about someone so much that you wanted to make a life long commitment to them. Doing something that you know would hurt them seems counterproductive to the state of marriage. I guess you can either hurt them in the short term and leave, or hurt them in the long term and cheat. Either way there's hurt. But one resolves quicker than the other. No one's hurt if they don't know You think they don't know? That's laughable. I knew for years that my mother was having an affair. So did my father. I also knew that my partner - of nearly five years - cheated on me five times. And I didn't even live with him. If you think they don't know, you must think they are stupid. They do often know. They just are scared of losing the person that they want to be with." | |||
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"Ive removed posts. Can you please have the discussion without commenting on peoples profiles when they havent asked for it. Thanks" Apologies if i have x | |||
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"I'm married in a sexless relationship. I'm upfront every time I meet someone. Have my own reasons to swing and suspect my wife knows why I do. For me it's just sex. " | |||
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" I was married...very happily for a long time...that was until my ex wife went off sex...i didn't cheat...but i did get my gratification elsewhere...until she found out !!!....it ultimately ended up in us getting divorced and costing us both a lot of money and heartache...me my advice is if anyone cherishes or loves there partner/wife..then stop...i only wish i could turn back the clock...one thing i do know is sex isn't worth happiness...and yes its cheating no matter how you look at it...and theres never any reason to cheat on the person you profess to love and cherish...i for one being a single man now...would never ever knowingly meet a married person...and yes i've had the chances to Really respect you for being open and honest here That is so well put, well written and heartfelt that you can't help but see your point of _iew... On the other hand there are many... And I mean many people who are in oppressive, unloving relationships, with little or little of the type of sex they need. What happens is they spen 20 years playing the good wife, raising kids who grow up and become less of a distraction, but without a skill or one that is so unused and out of the game or in an untenable situation... E.g. Aged dying parent, dragging on for 3 years... They need to feel something, they can't leave due to circumstance and are deeply unhappy... Que many saying just leave... I can think of many situations where this is not possible... At somepoint the invisible prison of their marriage vows become meaningless... But most people will always see the world from their point of _iew... So they look down on those that don't conform to their high standards... No matter how much good someone has done for there neighbour, local community or mankind.... They cheated! Totally outdated concept! You can leave...i did i was married for 30 years we got married at 18..we were together from the age of 14...to me its an excuse..and tbh there cant be any excuse for cheating...because if you love and cherish someone..you put up with there failings..good or bad..like i've said if i could had done things differently i would had " You can't just leave.... It's akin to saying if you don't like the way the country is run you can just leave. I can... I'm willing to bet you can't! See how that works? And don't give me the love story either... Most who spout about love have never done a thing to help the people of this world. Loving a partner is simply loving yourself. | |||
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"It must make life really easy living in the black and white world." It certainly made my life better about a million times over when I started to live honestly, and choose to surround myself with those who also live honestly. | |||
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" I was married...very happily for a long time...that was until my ex wife went off sex...i didn't cheat...but i did get my gratification elsewhere...until she found out !!!....it ultimately ended up in us getting divorced and costing us both a lot of money and heartache...me my advice is if anyone cherishes or loves there partner/wife..then stop...i only wish i could turn back the clock...one thing i do know is sex isn't worth happiness...and yes its cheating no matter how you look at it...and theres never any reason to cheat on the person you profess to love and cherish...i for one being a single man now...would never ever knowingly meet a married person...and yes i've had the chances to Really respect you for being open and honest here That is so well put, well written and heartfelt that you can't help but see your point of _iew... On the other hand there are many... And I mean many people who are in oppressive, unloving relationships, with little or little of the type of sex they need. What happens is they spen 20 years playing the good wife, raising kids who grow up and become less of a distraction, but without a skill or one that is so unused and out of the game or in an untenable situation... E.g. Aged dying parent, dragging on for 3 years... They need to feel something, they can't leave due to circumstance and are deeply unhappy... Que many saying just leave... I can think of many situations where this is not possible... At somepoint the invisible prison of their marriage vows become meaningless... But most people will always see the world from their point of _iew... So they look down on those that don't conform to their high standards... No matter how much good someone has done for there neighbour, local community or mankind.... They cheated! Totally outdated concept! You can leave...i did i was married for 30 years we got married at 18..we were together from the age of 14...to me its an excuse..and tbh there cant be any excuse for cheating...because if you love and cherish someone..you put up with there failings..good or bad..like i've said if i could had done things differently i would had You can't just leave.... It's akin to saying if you don't like the way the country is run you can just leave. I can... I'm willing to bet you can't! See how that works? And don't give me the love story either... Most who spout about love have never done a thing to help the people of this world. Loving a partner is simply loving yourself." You would be very surprised | |||
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"Getting a phone call from an outraged 'other half' must be a real pain...especially if you were 'sure' they seemed single... I've had it loads of times And belive me They rarely call me back I am Welsh and have a firey temper lol " Ahhhhh thats why we get on | |||
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"Not really. It just makes things a bit complicated if the cheater gets found out which is why we would avoid such encounters. Imagine being the respondents in a divorce case. messy or what " but if hes cheating on fab who will be named in the divorce. ? Hes not cheating with just 1 person!!! | |||
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"I really don't care if they are cheating or not most married men looks for sex outside cos they don't get any at home they are bloody right to b on here " or have a medical problem. | |||
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"It must make life really easy living in the black and white world. It certainly made my life better about a million times over when I started to live honestly, and choose to surround myself with those who also live honestly." I agree But very few people are totally honest 100% of the time Even our closest friends and family Ask any teenager where he was until 2 in the morning Lol | |||
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" I was married...very happily for a long time...that was until my ex wife went off sex...i didn't cheat...but i did get my gratification elsewhere...until she found out !!!....it ultimately ended up in us getting divorced and costing us both a lot of money and heartache...me my advice is if anyone cherishes or loves there partner/wife..then stop...i only wish i could turn back the clock...one thing i do know is sex isn't worth happiness...and yes its cheating no matter how you look at it...and theres never any reason to cheat on the person you profess to love and cherish...i for one being a single man now...would never ever knowingly meet a married person...and yes i've had the chances to Really respect you for being open and honest here That is so well put, well written and heartfelt that you can't help but see your point of _iew... On the other hand there are many... And I mean many people who are in oppressive, unloving relationships, with little or little of the type of sex they need. What happens is they spen 20 years playing the good wife, raising kids who grow up and become less of a distraction, but without a skill or one that is so unused and out of the game or in an untenable situation... E.g. Aged dying parent, dragging on for 3 years... They need to feel something, they can't leave due to circumstance and are deeply unhappy... Que many saying just leave... I can think of many situations where this is not possible... At somepoint the invisible prison of their marriage vows become meaningless... But most people will always see the world from their point of _iew... So they look down on those that don't conform to their high standards... No matter how much good someone has done for there neighbour, local community or mankind.... They cheated! Totally outdated concept! You can leave...i did i was married for 30 years we got married at 18..we were together from the age of 14...to me its an excuse..and tbh there cant be any excuse for cheating...because if you love and cherish someone..you put up with there failings..good or bad..like i've said if i could had done things differently i would had You can't just leave.... It's akin to saying if you don't like the way the country is run you can just leave. I can... I'm willing to bet you can't! See how that works? And don't give me the love story either... Most who spout about love have never done a thing to help the people of this world. Loving a partner is simply loving yourself." Oooooo last sentence, we're getting into the realms of philosophy | |||
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"I really don't care if they are cheating or not most married men looks for sex outside cos they don't get any at home they are bloody right to b on here. " And, of course, people never lie. I doubt the excuses make any difference to you anyway but I hate when people blame the absent partner without their side of the story. | |||
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"They don't bother me being on here, they should concentrate on meeting people who will meet them and shag like bunnies........ It's any bleating about the reason they are on here and if the absent partner gets the blame, I think that is shit..... Just fucking do it and stop grandstanding or whimpering " | |||
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"Not really. It just makes things a bit complicated if the cheater gets found out which is why we would avoid such encounters. Imagine being the respondents in a divorce case. messy or what but if hes cheating on fab who will be named in the divorce. ? Hes not cheating with just 1 person!!!" Not if they don't know your real name or where you live | |||
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"It must make life really easy living in the black and white world." Yes because there is no grey area when it comes to cheating. You're either cheating or not. If your partner knows and consents that you're having sex with other people you're not cheating. If they don't know you're having sex with other people then you are cheating. Where's the grey area? All sly cheating means is whoevers doing it has so little respect for their partner that instead of either taking care of it themselves or talking about it to this person who they've made a commitment to they choose to lie and sneak about. Where's the grey area? If they have expressed they are not happy and the partner is unwilling to make any effort discussing, agreeing to a halfway point or attending counciling then yes, different story. But living under the delusion that nobody can get hurt while cheating is immature and irresponsible. | |||
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"Im married and oh doesnt know about me being on here, we dont really have a sex life but do still want to stay together and have a great life. I (selfishly you may say) still enjoy sex and do like to meet other people. I am open about being married on my profile, but not to my wife. Situations and home life can be complicated and not always black and white. Some may say cheating is cheating and you could be right but some people do have reasons for doing it. Not always acceptable reasons to others who are happily married and in sound relationships but we all have our reasons for being on here. I was married...very happily for a long time...that was until my ex wife went off sex...i didn't cheat...but i did get my gratification elsewhere...until she found out !!!....it ultimately ended up in us getting divorced and costing us both a lot of money and heartache...me my advice is if anyone cherishes or loves there partner/wife..then stop...i only wish i could turn back the clock...one thing i do know is sex isn't worth happiness...and yes its cheating no matter how you look at it...and theres never any reason to cheat on the person you profess to love and cherish...i for one being a single man now...would never ever knowingly meet a married person...and yes i've had the chances to " I'm confused. You say you didn't cheat but got your gratification elsewhere??? | |||
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"Not really. It just makes things a bit complicated if the cheater gets found out which is why we would avoid such encounters. Imagine being the respondents in a divorce case. messy or what but if hes cheating on fab who will be named in the divorce. ? Hes not cheating with just 1 person!!!" Any who have been found out can be named. This is the main reason why i don't do married guys, i don't wanna be caught up in their legal contracts. If people wanna do their own thing they shouldn't legally tie themselves to others. -------------------------------------- We all have our own morals. This debate depends mainly on whether people feel obliged to complete strangers who we don't know or whether we choose to fulfil our own needs instead. I don't think there's any other combination of morals here. It's easy to be honest when we have nothing to lose from that, it's hard to be honest when we might lose something we want to keep. I'm fairly honest all the time because i don't care about most poeples opinions, but i've never told anyone i've cheated on them unless i had a motive to do so, such as hurt them. | |||
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"It must make life really easy living in the black and white world. It certainly made my life better about a million times over when I started to live honestly, and choose to surround myself with those who also live honestly." Thats what I don't get. If I had been the victim of infidelity (as some on the thread appear to be)I don't think my first thought would be to join a swingers site to get over it. | |||
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