FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Rant about ....bareback
Rant about ....bareback
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
I know I know.
It's an over posted topic but I just need to vent. Feel free to ignore me.
I'm so bored of women speaking to us (predominately him but on our couples profile) and asking for bareback.
At first I thought it was a test. Maybe if he said yes... They'd say... 'Aha! If you're into bareback then I'll pass.'
But no, they constantly ask him for it.
The one that makes me want to bang my head against the wall is....
I can't get pregnant so bare back is fine.
Or... Insisting on protection for vaginal but bareback for anal is totally fine.
Rancid people! Idiots! I do not want you near my man or me.
I've had to add it onto our profile now that we only practise safe sex. Stupid me thought that in this day and age, people took pride in their sexual health. That swingers, are knowledgable and open about sexual health. That they embraced possible promiscuity with a savvy attitude of being safe.
This isn't just a handful of people. This is the majority of women. And mostly, the women from couples profiles.
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere. I'd just be thinking the whole time about a disinfection douche. About taking my enema kit along with a bottle of Dettol.
I think that's why I prefer playing in clubs. I don't think I've seen anyone not having protected sex unless they are an established couple. Why do people practise safe sex in clubs but for home meets, it's bareback galore. Blurgh.
I know I'm slanting all this at women but that's my current experiences with messages. It's just such a massive turn off. And I wouldn't touch my man again if he'd fucked them.
Rant over. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"That swingers, are knowledgable and open about sexual health. "
Good one. Read the forums a while and you'll find out that ignorance about such matters is as rife as anywhere else.
"I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere."
How do you know? Do you insist on a list of meets before meeting? People can, and do, lie.
You shouldn't bother about other peoples sexual health. Play safe (like you do), get tested (like you should), and relax. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere.
How do you know? Do you insist on a list of meets before meeting? People can, and do, lie.
You shouldn't bother about other peoples sexual health. Play safe (like you do), get tested (like you should), and relax."
 Bit strange that anyone ever believes that people play safe. The mind boggles.
Just assume that everyone does bareback..... |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere.
How do you know? Do you insist on a list of meets before meeting? People can, and do, lie.
You shouldn't bother about other peoples sexual health. Play safe (like you do), get tested (like you should), and relax.
Bit strange that anyone ever believes that people play safe. The mind boggles.
Just assume that everyone does bareback..... "
I don't assume that people play safe. Ever. I'm just surprised and disappointed that it's so rife that people don't. |
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"
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere.
How do you know? Do you insist on a list of meets before meeting? People can, and do, lie.
You shouldn't bother about other peoples sexual health. Play safe (like you do), get tested (like you should), and relax.
Bit strange that anyone ever believes that people play safe. The mind boggles.
Just assume that everyone has does bareback..... "
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"That swingers, are knowledgable and open about sexual health.
Good one. Read the forums a while and you'll find out that ignorance about such matters is as rife as anywhere else.
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere.
How do you know? Do you insist on a list of meets before meeting? People can, and do, lie.
You shouldn't bother about other peoples sexual health. Play safe (like you do), get tested (like you should), and relax."
No, I don't ask people for a list. But usually if someone opens up a dialogue with me and states up front that they only do safe sex, highlighting it's quite a priority for them. Then I tend to continue the conversation. |
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"That swingers, are knowledgable and open about sexual health.
Good one. Read the forums a while and you'll find out that ignorance about such matters is as rife as anywhere else.
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere.
How do you know? Do you insist on a list of meets before meeting? People can, and do, lie.
You shouldn't bother about other peoples sexual health. Play safe (like you do), get tested (like you should), and relax."
|
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"If you are so obsessed by it then swinging may not be for you as there are no guarantees.. Some people will lie to your face to get a shag"
Yes, I'm a little obsessed with safe sex I guess.
It was a rant about being inundated with women asking for cream pies. Just a little vent about how much of a turn off bareback requests are for me. Yanno, on a swinging forum. Rather than me telling the family or the woman at the CoOp.
For the record, I'm not a swinger. My man is.
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"If you are so obsessed by it then swinging may not be for you as there are no guarantees.. Some people will lie to your face to get a shag
Yes, I'm a little obsessed with safe sex I guess.
It was a rant about being inundated with women asking for cream pies. Just a little vent about how much of a turn off bareback requests are for me. Yanno, on a swinging forum. Rather than me telling the family or the woman at the CoOp.
For the record, I'm not a swinger. My man is.
"
Rant away.... I didn't suggest you ranted to others |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere.
How do you know? Do you insist on a list of meets before meeting? People can, and do, lie.
You shouldn't bother about other peoples sexual health. Play safe (like you do), get tested (like you should), and relax.
Bit strange that anyone ever believes that people play safe. The mind boggles.
Just assume that everyone does bareback.....
I don't assume that people play safe. Ever. I'm just surprised and disappointed that it's so rife that people don't. "
I'm not surprised by anything anymore.  |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"If you are so obsessed by it then swinging may not be for you as there are no guarantees.. Some people will lie to your face to get a shag
Yes, I'm a little obsessed with safe sex I guess.
It was a rant about being inundated with women asking for cream pies. Just a little vent about how much of a turn off bareback requests are for me. Yanno, on a swinging forum. Rather than me telling the family or the woman at the CoOp.
For the record, I'm not a swinger. My man is.
Rant away.... I didn't suggest you ranted to others "
Good 
I'd probably be banned from the CoOp otherwise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Capital letters on our profile .... NO GLOVE NO LOVE,
We only practice safe sex others dont but as long as I know me and my better half are wrapped up safe n clean im happy! |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"Capital letters on our profile .... NO GLOVE NO LOVE,
We only practice safe sex others dont but as long as I know me and my better half are wrapped up safe n clean im happy! "
Ha. Brilliant! |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"I have gone b/b on a couple of occasions but have been tested after. ...
But I only practice safe sex now. .. but still get tested..."
I still get routinely tested despite safe sex. It's just a good routine to have. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have gone b/b on a couple of occasions but have been tested after. ...
But I only practice safe sex now. .. but still get tested..."
Why bother getting tested if you only do "safe sex"?
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The old bareback issue again lol. You wont alwais end up pregnant in bareback, simply pull out before cum, also oral without is dangerous and also licking a pussey. Hoe do u know they played safe before? Most will say yes just to get a meet. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"I have gone b/b on a couple of occasions but have been tested after. ...
But I only practice safe sex now. .. but still get tested...
Why bother getting tested if you only do "safe sex"?
"
Free condoms  |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"I have gone b/b on a couple of occasions but have been tested after. ...
But I only practice safe sex now. .. but still get tested...
Why bother getting tested if you only do "safe sex"?
"
Lots of reasons. Oral isn't always safe. And I don't use dental dam on women. I try to use condoms on toys if I'm sharing them but I know my strap on base still ends up covered in gush which ends up on me. In case a condom breaks and condoms I've gotten in a club, aren't the best quality. I like knowing I have a clean bill of health. It's my piece of mind and I like being able to say to others. You risk with me is as minimal as I can make it. I don't see why you would snub that. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"What I find hard to believe is that your husband gets women asking for sex! What's his secret? Lol "
He's not my husband. It's on our couples account. But it's predominately single women and couples asking for meets with just him. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"What I find hard to believe is that your husband gets women asking for sex! What's his secret? Lol
He's not my husband. It's on our couples account. But it's predominately single women and couples asking for meets with just him. "
Does he not have a solo profile?
You must be the only 'couple' where so much attention is directed at the male! 
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have gone b/b on a couple of occasions but have been tested after. ...
But I only practice safe sex now. .. but still get tested...
Why bother getting tested if you only do "safe sex"?
Lots of reasons. Oral isn't always safe. And I don't use dental dam on women. I try to use condoms on toys if I'm sharing them but I know my strap on base still ends up covered in gush which ends up on me. In case a condom breaks and condoms I've gotten in a club, aren't the best quality. I like knowing I have a clean bill of health. It's my piece of mind and I like being able to say to others. You risk with me is as minimal as I can make it. I don't see why you would snub that. "
Not snubbing anything. My point was, the only 'safe sex' is monogamy.
None of what you have described is 'safe'.
I don't understand why the term 'safe sex' was used. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What I find hard to believe is that your husband gets women asking for sex! What's his secret? Lol
He's not my husband. It's on our couples account. But it's predominately single women and couples asking for meets with just him.
Does he not have a solo profile?
You must be the only 'couple' where so much attention is directed at the male!
A"
Yes. I thought the same lol. |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"
Not snubbing anything. My point was, the only 'safe sex' is monogamy.
None of what you have described is 'safe'.
I don't understand why the term 'safe sex' was used."
Monogamous sex isn't always safe, either party might have something before entering the relationship.
Phone sex, setting and webcam are STD free, as is masturbation. Also no chance of unplanned pregnancy! |
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No glove no love from us either. We value our health, if others choose not to that's up to them.
If they bareback with other people that's between them, but it will always be condoms with us. However if a profile states they only do bareback, or they ask us for it, not interested. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"No glove no love from us either. We value our health, if others choose not to that's up to them.
If they bareback with other people that's between them, but it will always be condoms with us. However if a profile states they only do bareback, or they ask us for it, not interested."
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"What I find hard to believe is that your husband gets women asking for sex! What's his secret? Lol
He's not my husband. It's on our couples account. But it's predominately single women and couples asking for meets with just him.
Does he not have a solo profile?
You must be the only 'couple' where so much attention is directed at the male!
A"
Bizarre that you've chosen to put 'couple'
Well, that's the case, he gets more attention on it than I do or we do as a couple.
No, he doesn't have a single profile.
My single profile is mainly focused on BDSM which I do alone. Our couples profile is focused on things we do as a couple. Even him having a solo meet is still part of our couple play and dynamic.
Why does it matter whether he has a solo profile or not? |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"What I find hard to believe is that your husband gets women asking for sex! What's his secret? Lol
He's not my husband. It's on our couples account. But it's predominately single women and couples asking for meets with just him.
Does he not have a solo profile?
You must be the only 'couple' where so much attention is directed at the male!
A
Bizarre that you've chosen to put 'couple'
Well, that's the case, he gets more attention on it than I do or we do as a couple.
No, he doesn't have a single profile.
My single profile is mainly focused on BDSM which I do alone. Our couples profile is focused on things we do as a couple. Even him having a solo meet is still part of our couple play and dynamic.
Why does it matter whether he has a solo profile or not?"
It doesn't.
And I put 'couple' because you stated you weren't one and I couldn't think of an alternative word to use.
I'm just suprised that he seems to get more attention.
Kind of bucks the trend of pretty much every joint (I thought of another word!) profile out there since sites like Fab started.
Is there any possibility he's contacting these women outside of Fab or via it and deleting messages without you knowing?
A |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"What I find hard to believe is that your husband gets women asking for sex! What's his secret? Lol
He's not my husband. It's on our couples account. But it's predominately single women and couples asking for meets with just him.
Does he not have a solo profile?
You must be the only 'couple' where so much attention is directed at the male!
A
Bizarre that you've chosen to put 'couple'
Well, that's the case, he gets more attention on it than I do or we do as a couple.
No, he doesn't have a single profile.
My single profile is mainly focused on BDSM which I do alone. Our couples profile is focused on things we do as a couple. Even him having a solo meet is still part of our couple play and dynamic.
Why does it matter whether he has a solo profile or not?
It doesn't.
And I put 'couple' because you stated you weren't one and I couldn't think of an alternative word to use.
I'm just suprised that he seems to get more attention.
Kind of bucks the trend of pretty much every joint (I thought of another word!) profile out there since sites like Fab started.
Is there any possibility he's contacting these women outside of Fab or via it and deleting messages without you knowing?
A"
I am a couple. I have a couples profile. I can't see where I've stated that I'm not a couple unless there is a typo.
Why does he have to be doing something underhand or deceitful for woman to be messaging him?
We use this site and another. A couple of apps. Everything we do is transparent. Occasionally we get a cross over where someone will contact one of our profiles and say they recognise our photos from another site. But that's it.
I've been on the couples account all day. I've had two single men contact the account. One to play with me and one to play with us as a couple.
I've had two females asking for us as a couple and a couple asking for us as a couple. The rest has been single females and wife's from couples asking for him. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
I'm not sure how my rant about finding bareback offers a turn off has been turned into my boyfriend deleting messages and secretly messaging other women on other sites. *rolls eyes*
Typical forum twisting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always look at the photos that are put on profiles, that usually tells me if that person is practising safe sex or not. Of course, not everyone posts action or creampie shots! I have a regular fwb, and we go bareback with each other. Both got tested and now use protection when with others but not with each other. It's nice, but you have to have complete trust in each other. If I do have a meet with someone new, it's always condoms, but I do oral without. I get tested every three to four months if I have meets other than with my fwb. |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"I always look at the photos that are put on profiles, that usually tells me if that person is practising safe sex or not. Of course, not everyone posts action or creampie shots! I have a regular fwb, and we go bareback with each other. Both got tested and now use protection when with others but not with each other. It's nice, but you have to have complete trust in each other. If I do have a meet with someone new, it's always condoms, but I do oral without. I get tested every three to four months if I have meets other than with my fwb. "
But they might be barebacking with their own partner, like you say you do. So you can't necessarily tell from the photos. |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"Did I read that right- you put a condom on a toy?
That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time. Thanks for the laugh"
Its best practice if you are sharing toys. I haven't heard of people doing it on just their own toys though.
I have heard of people with stainless steel toys (like the njoy 11) covering them in an alcohol hand gel and then setting them on fire in between partners! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I always look at the photos that are put on profiles, that usually tells me if that person is practising safe sex or not. Of course, not everyone posts action or creampie shots! I have a regular fwb, and we go bareback with each other. Both got tested and now use protection when with others but not with each other. It's nice, but you have to have complete trust in each other. If I do have a meet with someone new, it's always condoms, but I do oral without. I get tested every three to four months if I have meets other than with my fwb.
But they might be barebacking with their own partner, like you say you do. So you can't necessarily tell from the photos."
True, but if they are with different people in the photos....it's not an infallible system, but it's a start. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"Did I read that right- you put a condom on a toy?
That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time. Thanks for the laugh
Its best practice if you are sharing toys. I haven't heard of people doing it on just their own toys though.
I have heard of people with stainless steel toys (like the njoy 11) covering them in an alcohol hand gel and then setting them on fire in between partners!"
I don't use a condom on my toys. I have my own set at home to use and then I have a set in my kit bag that I use with others. Yes I put a condom on dildos and strap on dongs. Also on buttplugs. I then sterilise them after use. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"Did I read that right- you put a condom on a toy?
That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time. Thanks for the laugh"
Why is that funny? I wouldn't use a dildo on me and then ram it into a girl. But then I'm not going to dash off and clean it mid play. So condoms are easy to use. I use them on dildos, buttplugs and strap on dongs. Also on my wand.
Every piece of equipment I have including canes, floggers, leather harness, whatever, all gets cleaned after use. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"Did I read that right- you put a condom on a toy?
That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time. Thanks for the laugh"
And actually come to think of it, sometimes I do use condoms on my toys if I'm at home alone. Only because they've just been washed after last use and slung in the back of the wardrobe. So rather than me get it out and resterilise it, I'll just put a condom on for quickness. It's just cleaner isn't it. And it makes no difference to me the feel of the toy. |
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"Did I read that right- you put a condom on a toy?
That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time. Thanks for the laugh
And actually come to think of it, sometimes I do use condoms on my toys if I'm at home alone. Only because they've just been washed after last use and slung in the back of the wardrobe. So rather than me get it out and resterilise it, I'll just put a condom on for quickness. It's just cleaner isn't it. And it makes no difference to me the feel of the toy. "
I think the gentleman possibly thinks of condoms as a contraceptive only. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"With all the sanitisation, do you even kiss?
Can catch some nasty germs through locking lips! "
Erm, I'm selective with my kissing. I remember attending a club recently and one of the greedy girls was covered in coldsores and trying to kiss and suck men off. Blurgh.
I just like my select few. Don't get me wrong, I love my lover spitting in my mouth and actually spitting all over me. I just don't want to play with people that bare back.
I'm fanatical about sanitisation because my kit bag is huge. And lots of people use it. So I'm not going to rock up with toys that are not immaculate.
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By *ach3Man
over a year ago
Watford |
In.my experience, mainly as part of a couple (past), both in the clubs (uk & abroad) & at house parties - it was accepted as norm.to play safe.
Never saw bareback accept the odd occassion when with their own.partners and wasn't aware of anyone asking for bareback.
Had always thought therefore safe sex the accepted norm |
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By *er himWoman
over a year ago
Essex |
"The old bareback issue again lol. You wont alwais end up pregnant in bareback, simply pull out before cum, also oral without is dangerous and also licking a pussey. Hoe do u know they played safe before? Most will say yes just to get a meet."
Won't get pregnant!!!! Just shows how ignorant of sex some people are. Of course you can. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The old bareback issue again lol. You wont alwais end up pregnant in bareback, simply pull out before cum, also oral without is dangerous and also licking a pussey. Hoe do u know they played safe before? Most will say yes just to get a meet.
Won't get pregnant!!!! Just shows how ignorant of sex some people are. Of course you can."
Yes but the chances are lower |
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Couple of people have asked "why get tested if you have safe sex?" Erm doh!!....its not 100% safe.
Anyway, back to OP, I've had couples in clubs wanting bsreback when it comes to penetration. It has happened to me tonight. I went a bit mad at the guy  |
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"
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere.
How do you know? Do you insist on a list of meets before meeting? People can, and do, lie.
You shouldn't bother about other peoples sexual health. Play safe (like you do), get tested (like you should), and relax.
Bit strange that anyone ever believes that people play safe. The mind boggles.
Just assume that everyone does bareback..... "
so many will when it comes down to it .say they only playsafe should not be belived in my experience. |
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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago
Wakefield |
It is frightening how many people seem to think sex using a condom is safe sex, it is not.
There is no such thing as safe sex.
It is still possible to get the following STIs when using a condom
HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhea, trichomoniasis, genital herpes, syphilis, and chancroid, genital human papillomavirus (HPV) infection and cervical cancer though the risk is reduced.
The risk of some STIs such as genital herpes, syphilis, and chancroid is increased if the genital area is shaved prior to a meet.
The risk of transmission of STIs is also increased when fingering or fisting and/or the use of an oil based lubricant is involved.
Even someone having sex for the first time can get an STI you do not have to have multiple partners.
Safer sex includes not shaving the pubic area, using a condom and having frequent check ups at a GUM clinic.
Only the naive and the ignorant think using a condom provides full protection from pregnancy and STIs.
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"It is frightening how many people seem to think sex using a condom is safe sex, it is not.
There is no such thing as safe sex.
It is still possible to get the following STIs when using a condom
HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhea, trichomoniasis, genital herpes, syphilis, and chancroid, genital human papillomavirus (HPV) infection and cervical cancer though the risk is reduced.
The risk of some STIs such as genital herpes, syphilis, and chancroid is increased if the genital area is shaved prior to a meet.
The risk of transmission of STIs is also increased when fingering or fisting and/or the use of an oil based lubricant is involved.
Even someone having sex for the first time can get an STI you do not have to have multiple partners.
Safer sex includes not shaving the pubic area, using a condom and having frequent check ups at a GUM clinic.
Only the naive and the ignorant think using a condom provides full protection from pregnancy and STIs.
"
I accept I take risks by playing with people hence why my routine is to get checked regularly. Apart from using dental dam for oral, when I play with others, I use condoms, like I said, even on toys. I think playing with other people that have a similar attitude as I, also reduces my risk.
This post was a rant about how much of a turn off strangers asking for bareback is for me. I agree, the safest sex is abstinence but I try and reduce my risk as much as possible.
Of course everyone prefers bareback. But no random fuck would be worth the risk for me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
As a swinger and BDSM practitioner (the health clinic ) classed my lifestyle as HR (high risk) and deny it or not we are all HR.
The best safe sex is still abstinence however we can't be this way so condom use amongst other practices can give us a degree of protection. It doesn't absolve you from STI/STD but it can negate a fraction of the risk no matter how minuscule.
The young man who scoffed at the condom/pregnancy comment - just so You know lad -PRE-ejaculate can make a woman pregnant. Pulling out (the WITHDRAWAL METHOD) is the least form and least wisest method to practice. Just FYI. (One of my friends years ago fell pregnant because the man, like you, thought pulling out guaranteed protection.)
It's surprising that in 2015 even after all the campaigning by the NHS and other government entities people can be so nonchalant and ignorant (deliberate or knowingly) about sexual health. We are supposed to be a community of users who engage in open sexual practices yet we would put other users at risk to guarantee our 15 minutes of pleasure. I thought as an online society we are to look out and protect each other. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Do you all know what the biggest risks are in this scene?
Lies,
Deceit,
Dishonesty,
Ignorance,
Marginalisation
Yet risk is minimalised, mitigated or removed with:
Truthfulness
Openness
Acceptance
Self Awareness
Education.
Mutual Understanding.
Its so sad that so many spend so long feeding the former instead of promoting the latter.
|
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"Do you all know what the biggest risks are in this scene?
Lies,
Deceit,
Dishonesty,
Ignorance,
Marginalisation
Yet risk is minimalised, mitigated or removed with:
Truthfulness
Openness
Acceptance
Self Awareness
Education.
Mutual Understanding.
Its so sad that so many spend so long feeding the former instead of promoting the latter.
"
|
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"Do you all know what the biggest risks are in this scene?
Lies,
Deceit,
Dishonesty,
Ignorance,
Marginalisation
Yet risk is minimalised, mitigated or removed with:
Truthfulness
Openness
Acceptance
Self Awareness
Education.
Mutual Understanding.
Its so sad that so many spend so long feeding the former instead of promoting the latter.
"
True here and in all of life. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"Ive done bareback
Wow, get over it "
I don't need to get over it. It doesn't concern me if you do bareback. My rant was people asking us for bareback. And me finding it a turn off. |
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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago
Wakefield |
"
The young man who scoffed at the condom/pregnancy comment - just so You know lad -PRE-ejaculate can make a woman pregnant. Pulling out (the WITHDRAWAL METHOD) is the least form and least wisest method to practice. Just FYI. (One of my friends years ago fell pregnant because the man, like you, thought pulling out guaranteed protection.)
"
My wife got pregnant three times whilst taking the contraceptive pill.
It was only during the third pregnancy we were informed that her other medication could interfere with the contraception (this was pre internet days when information was not so readily available).
Getting pregnant is very similar to catching an STI.
It could happen the first time you have sex or you could have sex a thousand times before it happens.
It is your choice what precautions you can live with.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It is frightening how many people seem to think sex using a condom is safe sex, it is not.
There is no such thing as safe sex.
It is still possible to get the following STIs when using a condom
HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhea, trichomoniasis, genital herpes, syphilis, and chancroid, genital human papillomavirus (HPV) infection and cervical cancer though the risk is reduced.
The risk of some STIs such as genital herpes, syphilis, and chancroid is increased if the genital area is shaved prior to a meet.
The risk of transmission of STIs is also increased when fingering or fisting and/or the use of an oil based lubricant is involved.
Even someone having sex for the first time can get an STI you do not have to have multiple partners.
Safer sex includes not shaving the pubic area, using a condom and having frequent check ups at a GUM clinic.
Only the naive and the ignorant think using a condom provides full protection from pregnancy and STIs.
"
My comment earlier about 'safe sex'/ why bother getting checked was sarcasm.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ive done bareback
Wow, get over it
I don't need to get over it. It doesn't concern me if you do bareback. My rant was people asking us for bareback. And me finding it a turn off. "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You want people to be honest about if they bareback, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about their marital status, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about whether they're straight/bi/gay/whatever, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
|
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"Ive done bareback
Wow, get over it
I don't need to get over it. It doesn't concern me if you do bareback. My rant was people asking us for bareback. And me finding it a turn off.
"
Wasnt directed at you hence my reason for not quoting you
Was just in general, theres a lot of people i find a turn off  |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"You want people to be honest about if they bareback, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about their marital status, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about whether they're straight/bi/gay/whatever, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
"
|
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"The old bareback issue again lol. You wont alwais end up pregnant in bareback, simply pull out before cum, also oral without is dangerous and also licking a pussey. Hoe do u know they played safe before? Most will say yes just to get a meet.
Won't get pregnant!!!! Just shows how ignorant of sex some people are. Of course you can.Yes but the chances are lower "
Are we soon going to be hearing the pitty patter of little tiny Shags running around????  |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"You want people to be honest about if they bareback, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about their marital status, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about whether they're straight/bi/gay/whatever, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
"
I fail to see how you're dragging in closet sexuality and adultery.
This is simply about my shock and disgust at how many woman have asked for bareback from my partner. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You want people to be honest about if they bareback, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about their marital status, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about whether they're straight/bi/gay/whatever, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
"
"Do you all know what the biggest risks are in this scene?
Lies,
Deceit,
Dishonesty,
Ignorance,
Marginalisation
Yet risk is minimalised, mitigated or removed with:
Truthfulness
Openness
Acceptance
Self Awareness
Education.
Mutual Understanding.
Its so sad that so many spend so long feeding the former instead of promoting the latter.
"
Both posts tell it how it is. Too many people come with guns blazing whenever these topics are discussed on both sides of the fence. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You want people to be honest about if they bareback, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about their marital status, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about whether they're straight/bi/gay/whatever, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
I fail to see how you're dragging in closet sexuality and adultery.
This is simply about my shock and disgust at how many woman have asked for bareback from my partner. "
Because like bareback they are the touch light topics that often end in flames |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"
I fail to see how you're dragging in closet sexuality and adultery.
This is simply about my shock and disgust at how many woman have asked for bareback from my partner.
Because like bareback they are the touch light topics that often end in flames"
Yes I knew I was opening the floodgates and was expecting the usual forum abuse. I was just irked that I needed a small space to rant. Fabswingers seemed better than with my work colleagues |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I know I know.
It's an over posted topic but I just need to vent. Feel free to ignore me.
I'm so bored of women speaking to us (predominately him but on our couples profile) and asking for bareback.
At first I thought it was a test. Maybe if he said yes... They'd say... 'Aha! If you're into bareback then I'll pass.'
But no, they constantly ask him for it.
The one that makes me want to bang my head against the wall is....
I can't get pregnant so bare back is fine.
Or... Insisting on protection for vaginal but bareback for anal is totally fine.
Rancid people! Idiots! I do not want you near my man or me.
I've had to add it onto our profile now that we only practise safe sex. Stupid me thought that in this day and age, people took pride in their sexual health. That swingers, are knowledgable and open about sexual health. That they embraced possible promiscuity with a savvy attitude of being safe.
This isn't just a handful of people. This is the majority of women. And mostly, the women from couples profiles.
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere. I'd just be thinking the whole time about a disinfection douche. About taking my enema kit along with a bottle of Dettol.
I think that's why I prefer playing in clubs. I don't think I've seen anyone not having protected sex unless they are an established couple. Why do people practise safe sex in clubs but for home meets, it's bareback galore. Blurgh.
I know I'm slanting all this at women but that's my current experiences with messages. It's just such a massive turn off. And I wouldn't touch my man again if he'd fucked them.
Rant over. "
I personally have seen more bareback in clubs that arent established partners.
Also you say wont play with those that havent played safely in past, how do you know sexual history when play at a club.
I get men asking daily for bare, and drives me nuts, and lengthens my block list.
Bare seems to be favoured by more than safesex, its inevitable you will be asked, just hit block and look after yourself, not worry about how others play |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think you make a good point. Bareback in my opinion is for partners and people you TRUST. It shouldnt be given freely as lets face it, if they do it with you they certainly do it elsewhere.
I think you either risk it or dont but the outcome is roulette. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"That swingers, are knowledgable and open about sexual health.
Good one. Read the forums a while and you'll find out that ignorance about such matters is as rife as anywhere else.
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere.
How do you know? Do you insist on a list of meets before meeting? People can, and do, lie.
You shouldn't bother about other peoples sexual health. Play safe (like you do), get tested (like you should), and relax.
No, I don't ask people for a list. But usually if someone opens up a dialogue with me and states up front that they only do safe sex, highlighting it's quite a priority for them. Then I tend to continue the conversation. "
We have played with couples that insist on safe sex right up till we are playing to get told... Oh you seem nice. And asked for bare.
We also know people that state it all the time but we have seen them practice anything but in a Club. And people will lie to get laid |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You want people to be honest about if they bareback, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about their marital status, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
You want people to be honest about whether they're straight/bi/gay/whatever, there needs to be less condemnation on here.
I fail to see how you're dragging in closet sexuality and adultery.
This is simply about my shock and disgust at how many woman have asked for bareback from my partner. "
It wasn't aimed at you in particular, I was just making the point that condemning something doesn't encourage people to be open about it. I'm not saying you're condemning people who do, just that the default position on here seems to me to be one that's inevitably going to drive it underground. Like with adulterers and 'straight' men.
And wouldn't we all prefer that people were open and honest about their preferences? |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"I know I know.
It's an over posted topic but I just need to vent. Feel free to ignore me.
I'm so bored of women speaking to us (predominately him but on our couples profile) and asking for bareback.
At first I thought it was a test. Maybe if he said yes... They'd say... 'Aha! If you're into bareback then I'll pass.'
But no, they constantly ask him for it.
The one that makes me want to bang my head against the wall is....
I can't get pregnant so bare back is fine.
Or... Insisting on protection for vaginal but bareback for anal is totally fine.
Rancid people! Idiots! I do not want you near my man or me.
I've had to add it onto our profile now that we only practise safe sex. Stupid me thought that in this day and age, people took pride in their sexual health. That swingers, are knowledgable and open about sexual health. That they embraced possible promiscuity with a savvy attitude of being safe.
This isn't just a handful of people. This is the majority of women. And mostly, the women from couples profiles.
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere. I'd just be thinking the whole time about a disinfection douche. About taking my enema kit along with a bottle of Dettol.
I think that's why I prefer playing in clubs. I don't think I've seen anyone not having protected sex unless they are an established couple. Why do people practise safe sex in clubs but for home meets, it's bareback galore. Blurgh.
I know I'm slanting all this at women but that's my current experiences with messages. It's just such a massive turn off. And I wouldn't touch my man again if he'd fucked them.
Rant over.
I personally have seen more bareback in clubs that arent established partners.
Also you say wont play with those that havent played safely in past, how do you know sexual history when play at a club.
I get men asking daily for bare, and drives me nuts, and lengthens my block list.
Bare seems to be favoured by more than safesex, its inevitable you will be asked, just hit block and look after yourself, not worry about how others play"
I don't ask for a sexual history in a club. I don't play sexually with men. My partner does with women. We have had orgies at a club with women that use condoms. I'm not saying my decisions are fail safe. But when a woman contacts us on fab asking for bareback, it's likely she's asked others for bareback and likely she's fucked others bareback. So I find it a turn off. And won't play with her or invite her into our couple.
If I'm speaking with a woman that mentions using condoms upfront, then I'm likely to explore the conversation further with her.
Again, my rant was shock over how many people (mostly women) ask for bareback.
As a regular club goer, who has worked in a club and also thrown my own fetish events. I've never come across anyone fucking without a condom unless they are established couples. That's just my experience. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I fail to see how you're dragging in closet sexuality and adultery.
This is simply about my shock and disgust at how many woman have asked for bareback from my partner.
Because like bareback they are the touch light topics that often end in flames
Yes I knew I was opening the floodgates and was expecting the usual forum abuse. I was just irked that I needed a small space to rant. Fabswingers seemed better than with my work colleagues "
That's not actually what I was getting at - more that these are the topics people would like people to be honest about on their profiles or in communication with them. And positing a potential reason why people aren't honest about it. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"
I fail to see how you're dragging in closet sexuality and adultery.
This is simply about my shock and disgust at how many woman have asked for bareback from my partner.
Because like bareback they are the touch light topics that often end in flames
Yes I knew I was opening the floodgates and was expecting the usual forum abuse. I was just irked that I needed a small space to rant. Fabswingers seemed better than with my work colleagues
That's not actually what I was getting at - more that these are the topics people would like people to be honest about on their profiles or in communication with them. And positing a potential reason why people aren't honest about it. "
People aren't dishonest with me about bareback. They are openly asking for it. They say it's what they prefer. And I'm sat looking at the message thinking, blurgh, no thanks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I fail to see how you're dragging in closet sexuality and adultery.
This is simply about my shock and disgust at how many woman have asked for bareback from my partner.
Because like bareback they are the touch light topics that often end in flames
Yes I knew I was opening the floodgates and was expecting the usual forum abuse. I was just irked that I needed a small space to rant. Fabswingers seemed better than with my work colleagues
That's not actually what I was getting at - more that these are the topics people would like people to be honest about on their profiles or in communication with them. And positing a potential reason why people aren't honest about it.
People aren't dishonest with me about bareback. They are openly asking for it. They say it's what they prefer. And I'm sat looking at the message thinking, blurgh, no thanks. "
But if they're being upfront and honest, why such a reaction instead of just delete, block, no not for me? |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"
But if they're being upfront and honest, why such a reaction instead of just delete, block, no not for me? "
I politely say... We're not into bareback and block. But my reaction, is one of surprised and disgust. I can't help my reaction. And because if the frequency of it, I felt like having a rant.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I fail to see how you're dragging in closet sexuality and adultery.
This is simply about my shock and disgust at how many woman have asked for bareback from my partner.
Because like bareback they are the touch light topics that often end in flames
Yes I knew I was opening the floodgates and was expecting the usual forum abuse. I was just irked that I needed a small space to rant. Fabswingers seemed better than with my work colleagues
That's not actually what I was getting at - more that these are the topics people would like people to be honest about on their profiles or in communication with them. And positing a potential reason why people aren't honest about it.
People aren't dishonest with me about bareback. They are openly asking for it. They say it's what they prefer. And I'm sat looking at the message thinking, blurgh, no thanks.
But if they're being upfront and honest, why such a reaction instead of just delete, block, no not for me? "
Exactly this, I'd rather people were honest so I can delete and block |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
But if they're being upfront and honest, why such a reaction instead of just delete, block, no not for me?
I politely say... We're not into bareback and block. But my reaction, is one of surprised and disgust. I can't help my reaction. And because if the frequency of it, I felt like having a rant.
"
Fair enough |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"(It may be worth mentioning on your profile though that you'll only practice safer sex...)"
I don't practise sex at all from this profile. I'm talking about my couples account. And as I said in the original post, I've now had to go and add it to my profile. I stupidly assumed that would be a given in this current time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
We are the same....what BIG TURN OFF !!
We will not meet or entertain anyone who practices bareback as we value our health.How many who ask you if you will do bareback and when you say NO...they say its ok I will use something....You aint coming near us !!!
We also have put it in our profile. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I don't practise sex at all from this profile. I'm talking about my couples account. And as I said in the original post, I've now had to go and add it to my profile. I stupidly assumed that would be a given in this current time. "
I may have misunderstood ... Are you saying you only practice safe sex as a couple but not as a single?
Sorry to ask but I'm slightly confused. Help a brotha out please
|
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"
I don't practise sex at all from this profile. I'm talking about my couples account. And as I said in the original post, I've now had to go and add it to my profile. I stupidly assumed that would be a given in this current time.
I may have misunderstood ... Are you saying you only practice safe sex as a couple but not as a single?
Sorry to ask but I'm slightly confused. Help a brotha out please
"
Ha. No. I'm saying I don't practise sex from my singles profile. It's my BDSM side. I do BDSM from this profile. My couples profile, 'we' swing from. He has sex with people and I watch. That is the account I'm referring to. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"We are the same....what BIG TURN OFF !!
We will not meet or entertain anyone who practices bareback as we value our health.How many who ask you if you will do bareback and when you say NO...they say its ok I will use something....You aint coming near us !!!
We also have put it in our profile."
Yay! I was starting to think I was there was only a few of us. It's also amusing the support I am getting via direct message about people's disgust with bareback but they don't want to comment publicly for fear of being jumped on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We are the same....what BIG TURN OFF !!
We will not meet or entertain anyone who practices bareback as we value our health.How many who ask you if you will do bareback and when you say NO...they say its ok I will use something....You aint coming near us !!!
We also have put it in our profile.
Yay! I was starting to think I was there was only a few of us. It's also amusing the support I am getting via direct message about people's disgust with bareback but they don't want to comment publicly for fear of being jumped on. "
I've had that on threads before. Unfortunately there are people who would argue with themselves in an empty house on here. Bareback is not for me and I agree I would have thought it was a given in swinging. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I can't say I've ever seen someone 'jumped on' or subjected to 'the usual forum abuse' for saying they don't like bareback, and they shouldn't be. Tends to be the exact opposite.
I don't think that it's really necessary for people to go on about how much it disgusts them though. What's basically happened is people have enquired if you do something which you don't, you said no and that was it. You seem to be letting that get to you disproportionately. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"We are the same....what BIG TURN OFF !!
We will not meet or entertain anyone who practices bareback as we value our health.How many who ask you if you will do bareback and when you say NO...they say its ok I will use something....You aint coming near us !!!
We also have put it in our profile.
Yay! I was starting to think I was there was only a few of us. It's also amusing the support I am getting via direct message about people's disgust with bareback but they don't want to comment publicly for fear of being jumped on.
I've had that on threads before. Unfortunately there are people who would argue with themselves in an empty house on here. Bareback is not for me and I agree I would have thought it was a given in swinging. "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Nothing is a given in swinging, I'd have though more acceptance of bisexuality would also be a given in swinging too but there are those who recoil in horror of the thought of a man who might have come into contact with another man's cock.
That's why stating your preferences on your profile, encouraging people asking questions and not condemning people for doing things you're not into are all the way forward for me and why I generally have a happy time with all the people I meet here, the ones I don't meet don't affect me a jot. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"I can't say I've ever seen someone 'jumped on' or subjected to 'the usual forum abuse' for saying they don't like bareback, and they shouldn't be. Tends to be the exact opposite.
I don't think that it's really necessary for people to go on about how much it disgusts them though. What's basically happened is people have enquired if you do something which you don't, you said no and that was it. You seem to be letting that get to you disproportionately. "
People make requests all the time via messages. If you don't wish to accomodate those requests then simply decline, delete, ignore or block.
Whether it's a request about playing bare, meeting at a certain time/place, wearing certain clothes/lingerie, meeting separately or dressing as a sheep and shoving a daffodil up your chuff.
It's sooo easy to just say no.
And since you can't control the requests people will make there's little point in getting stressed about them.
A |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"Nothing is a given in swinging, I'd have though more acceptance of bisexuality would also be a given in swinging too but there are those who recoil in horror of the thought of a man who might have come into contact with another man's cock.
That's why stating your preferences on your profile, encouraging people asking questions and not condemning people for doing things you're not into are all the way forward for me and why I generally have a happy time with all the people I meet here, the ones I don't meet don't affect me a jot. "
It just makes me a bit sad. Even some of the comments in this thread. About someone laughing because I put condoms on toys in sharing during a play session. The level of idiocy is just.... Sad.
I recently hostessed an all girl orgy with 20 odd females. We had toys and strap Ons galore. Everyone I played with used condoms on the toys and they were changed between women. Good job him up there wasn't there. He would have distracted us with his laughter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nothing is a given in swinging, I'd have though more acceptance of bisexuality would also be a given in swinging too but there are those who recoil in horror of the thought of a man who might have come into contact with another man's cock.
That's why stating your preferences on your profile, encouraging people asking questions and not condemning people for doing things you're not into are all the way forward for me and why I generally have a happy time with all the people I meet here, the ones I don't meet don't affect me a jot.
It just makes me a bit sad. Even some of the comments in this thread. About someone laughing because I put condoms on toys in sharing during a play session. The level of idiocy is just.... Sad.
I recently hostessed an all girl orgy with 20 odd females. We had toys and strap Ons galore. Everyone I played with used condoms on the toys and they were changed between women. Good job him up there wasn't there. He would have distracted us with his laughter. "
Oh I'm with you on disappointment at the level of idiocy out there. It's a bit disturbing at times. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"I can't say I've ever seen someone 'jumped on' or subjected to 'the usual forum abuse' for saying they don't like bareback, and they shouldn't be. Tends to be the exact opposite.
I don't think that it's really necessary for people to go on about how much it disgusts them though. What's basically happened is people have enquired if you do something which you don't, you said no and that was it. You seem to be letting that get to you disproportionately.
People make requests all the time via messages. If you don't wish to accomodate those requests then simply decline, delete, ignore or block.
Whether it's a request about playing bare, meeting at a certain time/place, wearing certain clothes/lingerie, meeting separately or dressing as a sheep and shoving a daffodil up your chuff.
It's sooo easy to just say no.
And since you can't control the requests people will make there's little point in getting stressed about them.
A"
I'm sorry if I'm coming across distressed or my level of disgust is disproportionate.
But it's my ranting thread. And I labelled it a ranting thread. I'm allowed to rant. I'm not being abusive, I'm not naming names. I don't care about requests people make. I'm very bored of being asked on our couple profile for bareback. My uncontrollable reaction is (which I usually keep to myself or my partner) is how rancid. Someone give the girl a dettol bath.
I felt like having a public rant.
Don't be confusing my little thread with me having panic attacks all weekend as I hyperventilate into a paper bag at the thought of STI risk.
And I repeat again.... I'm shocked that bareback is so rife and the requests, in my experience, all come from women. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I don't practise sex at all from this profile. I'm talking about my couples account. And as I said in the original post, I've now had to go and add it to my profile. I stupidly assumed that would be a given in this current time.
I may have misunderstood ... Are you saying you only practice safe sex as a couple but not as a single?
Sorry to ask but I'm slightly confused. Help a brotha out please
Ha. No. I'm saying I don't practise sex from my singles profile. It's my BDSM side. I do BDSM from this profile. My couples profile, 'we' swing from. He has sex with people and I watch. That is the account I'm referring to. "
Thank lol it's so easy to misunderstand on posts. I do see your original point btw and bare back sex increases the risk greatly in an already high risk lifestyle.
But we are all adults and have to live with the consequences of our actions. We can't say "I didn't know."
I guess for some, they like playing sexual Russian roulette.
Me ... I prefer just that tad bit extra few years on my life and health so I'll stay on the Condom and Safer Sex band wagon.
I'm too young sexy and good looking to spend the rest of it as a corpse |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"
I don't practise sex at all from this profile. I'm talking about my couples account. And as I said in the original post, I've now had to go and add it to my profile. I stupidly assumed that would be a given in this current time.
I may have misunderstood ... Are you saying you only practice safe sex as a couple but not as a single?
Sorry to ask but I'm slightly confused. Help a brotha out please
Ha. No. I'm saying I don't practise sex from my singles profile. It's my BDSM side. I do BDSM from this profile. My couples profile, 'we' swing from. He has sex with people and I watch. That is the account I'm referring to.
Thank lol it's so easy to misunderstand on posts. I do see your original point btw and bare back sex increases the risk greatly in an already high risk lifestyle.
But we are all adults and have to live with the consequences of our actions. We can't say "I didn't know."
I guess for some, they like playing sexual Russian roulette.
Me ... I prefer just that tad bit extra few years on my life and health so I'll stay on the Condom and Safer Sex band wagon.
I'm too young sexy and good looking to spend the rest of it as a corpse"
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"I know I know.
It's an over posted topic but I just need to vent. Feel free to ignore me.
I'm so bored of women speaking to us (predominately him but on our couples profile) and asking for bareback.
At first I thought it was a test. Maybe if he said yes... They'd say... 'Aha! If you're into bareback then I'll pass.'
But no, they constantly ask him for it.
The one that makes me want to bang my head against the wall is....
I can't get pregnant so bare back is fine.
Or... Insisting on protection for vaginal but bareback for anal is totally fine.
Rancid people! Idiots! I do not want you near my man or me.
I've had to add it onto our profile now that we only practise safe sex. Stupid me thought that in this day and age, people took pride in their sexual health. That swingers, are knowledgable and open about sexual health. That they embraced possible promiscuity with a savvy attitude of being safe.
This isn't just a handful of people. This is the majority of women. And mostly, the women from couples profiles.
I won't even play safely with people that don't play safely elsewhere. I'd just be thinking the whole time about a disinfection douche. About taking my enema kit along with a bottle of Dettol.
I think that's why I prefer playing in clubs. I don't think I've seen anyone not having protected sex unless they are an established couple. Why do people practise safe sex in clubs but for home meets, it's bareback galore. Blurgh.
I know I'm slanting all this at women but that's my current experiences with messages. It's just such a massive turn off. And I wouldn't touch my man again if he'd fucked them.
Rant over. "
My health is far to important to risk bare back and any one who is only looking for bareback is instantly blocked!! I'd only have bare back with an established partner who I knew I trusted and we'd both been checked! I onky ever play safe and get checked every 3 months just in case and insist on using my own condoms as I know they are safe and where they've been!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I've had that on threads before. Unfortunately there are people who would argue with themselves in an empty house on here. "
Why does every comment you make have to be a snipe at somebody? ... |
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"Do you all know what the biggest risks are in this scene?
Lies,
Deceit,
Dishonesty,
Ignorance,
Marginalisation
Well said old boy
Yet risk is minimalised, mitigated or removed with:
Truthfulness
Openness
Acceptance
Self Awareness
Education.
Mutual Understanding.
Its so sad that so many spend so long feeding the former instead of promoting the latter.
"
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"
My health is far to important to risk bare back and any one who is only looking for bareback is instantly blocked!! I'd only have bare back with an established partner who I knew I trusted and we'd both been checked! I onky ever play safe and get checked every 3 months just in case and insist on using my own condoms as I know they are safe and where they've been!!"
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
Quick question to those who state they block anyone that plays/requests bareback.
If you block them - how do you know who else on site they've met and played bare with if you can no longer see their profile?
A
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"Quick question to those who state they block anyone that plays/requests bareback.
If you block them - how do you know who else on site they've met and played bare with if you can no longer see their profile?
A
"
I'm not that fanatical. I don't research people. I take it on case by case message. If they ask for bareback, they get a no thanks. I don't look at their veris then the veris of those people and make notes on my phone.
Like I said, If someone speaks to me and mentions they use condoms early in the conversation, ideally without being prompted by me, i usually explore the conversation further. If later down the line, they ask for bareback, then I'd stop communicating. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I've had that on threads before. Unfortunately there are people who would argue with themselves in an empty house on here.
Why does every comment you make have to be a snipe at somebody? ... "
What's it got to do with you what I say on here? You are of no interest to me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
Bareback is not for me and I agree I would have thought it was a given in swinging.
Why? People can do what the heck they want ... "
Of course they can. Did I say different? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
Bareback is not for me and I agree I would have thought it was a given in swinging.
Why? People can do what the heck they want ...
Of course they can. Did I say different? "
No not at all. I think I'm just surprised that you're surprised. |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"Quick question to those who state they block anyone that plays/requests bareback.
If you block them - how do you know who else on site they've met and played bare with if you can no longer see their profile?
A
"
Thats easy
One hires private 'Dicks' to keep track of their nefarious activities |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
Bareback is not for me and I agree I would have thought it was a given in swinging.
Why? People can do what the heck they want ...
Of course they can. Did I say different?
No not at all. I think I'm just surprised that you're surprised. "
I'm learning not to be on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its like religion, noone will agree lol
True. But this thread gives me an idea on who is play with and who I wouldn't "
lol yes, but most would be to far anyway |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"...
Bareback is not for me and I agree I would have thought it was a given in swinging.
Why? People can do what the heck they want ...
Of course they can. Did I say different?
No not at all. I think I'm just surprised that you're surprised.
I'm learning not to be on here "
I'm obviously naive. I was proper shocked. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Quick question to those who state they block anyone that plays/requests bareback.
If you block them - how do you know who else on site they've met and played bare with if you can no longer see their profile?
A
"
how can they know they havent barebacked on other meet but just dont let anyone know in the profile? Many play bb even tho it sais safe lol. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"Quick question to those who state they block anyone that plays/requests bareback.
If you block them - how do you know who else on site they've met and played bare with if you can no longer see their profile?
A
how can they know they havent barebacked on other meet but just dont let anyone know in the profile? Many play bb even tho it sais safe lol."
You're both losing me now. I don't even understand either of your points.
This was about woman openly messaging and requesting bareback from my partner and me being shocked and disgusted by it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Quick question to those who state they block anyone that plays/requests bareback.
If you block them - how do you know who else on site they've met and played bare with if you can no longer see their profile?
A
how can they know they havent barebacked on other meet but just dont let anyone know in the profile? Many play bb even tho it sais safe lol.
You're both losing me now. I don't even understand either of your points.
This was about woman openly messaging and requesting bareback from my partner and me being shocked and disgusted by it. "
ah yes, which I got some of them msgs lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
Bareback is not for me and I agree I would have thought it was a given in swinging.
Why? People can do what the heck they want ...
Of course they can. Did I say different?
No not at all. I think I'm just surprised that you're surprised.
I'm learning not to be on here
I'm obviously naive. I was proper shocked. "
Just keep being yourself hunny and don't let other people bother you. Quite a few things have shocked me on this site but I still enjoy it and meet some great people |
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I recently got asked to meet someone, when I said safe sex as in using a condom, I got told they get tested regularly and don't need it.
I seem to recall a porn star caught HIV from another star, he infected 11 other women before he was diagnosed with it himself. That is with regular checks as well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
Bareback is not for me and I agree I would have thought it was a given in swinging.
Why? People can do what the heck they want ...
Of course they can. Did I say different?
No not at all. I think I'm just surprised that you're surprised.
I'm learning not to be on here
I'm obviously naive. I was proper shocked.
Just keep being yourself hunny and don't let other people bother you. Quite a few things have shocked me on this site but I still enjoy it and meet some great people "
I don't think being naive is necessarily a bad thing. Innocence can be a happy place. Just keep smiling. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"...
Bareback is not for me and I agree I would have thought it was a given in swinging.
Why? People can do what the heck they want ...
Of course they can. Did I say different?
No not at all. I think I'm just surprised that you're surprised.
I'm learning not to be on here
I'm obviously naive. I was proper shocked.
Just keep being yourself hunny and don't let other people bother you. Quite a few things have shocked me on this site but I still enjoy it and meet some great people
I don't think being naive is necessarily a bad thing. Innocence can be a happy place. Just keep smiling. "
I like my naivety sometimes. I'm not naive when it comes to STI risk though :s |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do bareback. If other people don't like it then that's fine. I wouldn't be offended by a block and a message delete. Don't think it's necessary to be disgusted in it though. Each to their own init I suppose. |
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By *ilac OP Woman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"I do bareback. If other people don't like it then that's fine. I wouldn't be offended by a block and a message delete. Don't think it's necessary to be disgusted in it though. Each to their own init I suppose."
Can't help my reaction. We all find repulsion in different things. Such as we all find pleasure in different things and all have different priorities.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do bareback. If other people don't like it then that's fine. I wouldn't be offended by a block and a message delete. Don't think it's necessary to be disgusted in it though. Each to their own init I suppose.
Can't help my reaction. We all find repulsion in different things. Such as we all find pleasure in different things and all have different priorities.
"
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