FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Is distance a problem?
Is distance a problem?
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So I live on an island, and with the best wishes in the world, best body, radiant personality, meeting fun women on fab is an uphill struggle. Lots of guys, even fewer women that normal. It's a small place, we do almost all know each other.
So my question is, I'm going to able to travel more this year? Is the distance an issue when starting to chat? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes it can be
I don't like guys to travel far as I fear I may not like him in the flesh then I'd feel bad for saying no if they have traveled a long way
I don't travel far for a first meet for the same reason, if I know someone travel isn't an issue so long as I know we like each other I don't mind traveling a distance |
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"Yes it can be
I don't like guys to travel far as I fear I may not like him in the flesh then I'd feel bad for saying no if they have traveled a long way
I don't travel far for a first meet for the same reason, if I know someone travel isn't an issue so long as I know we like each other I don't mind traveling a distance "
Thanks, good perspective, so it's breaking the ice.
So if someone travelled for other reasons, you wouldn't feel bad if you didn't hit it off then? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes it can be
I don't like guys to travel far as I fear I may not like him in the flesh then I'd feel bad for saying no if they have traveled a long way
I don't travel far for a first meet for the same reason, if I know someone travel isn't an issue so long as I know we like each other I don't mind traveling a distance
Thanks, good perspective, so it's breaking the ice.
So if someone travelled for other reasons, you wouldn't feel bad if you didn't hit it off then? "
What other reason would a guy off here travel to meet me? |
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we meet socially first with no exceptions and always try and meet half way between locations if we can, if a man was more than an hour's distance we would be unlikely to meet simply because as had been said we would feel awkward if we decided not to take things further and vice versa. Also the way we play needs trust to be built up and its difficult to do that from a distance. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Distance isn't a problem to me, I travel a lot anyway, as part of my job and as part of my hobbies, and would have no problem visiting somewhere and maybe hooking up with someone for a drink, no expectations, just a pleasant social meet..... but we don't all think the same.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes it can be
I don't like guys to travel far as I fear I may not like him in the flesh then I'd feel bad for saying no if they have travelled a long way
I don't travel far for a first meet for the same reason, if I know someone travel isn't an issue so long as I know we like each other I don't mind traveling a distance "
This  |
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"we meet socially first with no exceptions and always try and meet half way between locations if we can, if a man was more than an hour's distance we would be unlikely to meet simply because as had been said we would feel awkward if we decided not to take things further and vice versa. Also the way we play needs trust to be built up and its difficult to do that from a distance."
Thanks this is helping me. The half way thing is a good idea except in my case we'd need speed boats or scuba gear. Lol hopefully I can write my profile in a why that alleviates these concerns. On the plus side once I get to know someone I can host them on this beautiful island |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We don't let distance become a deciding factor or a problem. We see it as an opportunity...............to visit new towns/cities, we like to travel anyway so why not make the most of it. If some hot sex comes into the equation as well..........perfect. If not, we've discovered somewhere we might not have visited otherwise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't let distance become a deciding factor or a problem. We see it as an opportunity...............to visit new towns/cities, we like to travel anyway so why not make the most of it. If some hot sex comes into the equation as well..........perfect. If not, we've discovered somewhere we might not have visited otherwise."
^^^ This.
It's not like we live in the US with huge distances. If I get chatting to someone I like and really wanted to meet them then I'd do just that. They'd be no expectations. It would be my choice to travel and so if it didn't work out then that's my problem. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
If someone is planning on visiting York and gives me enough notice and I find them attractive then I'll meet them. But I won't expect someone to travel 100s of miles on the off chance we'll get on. And I find that men who message me to say they'll visit never do.
Also, messaging me at 11.20 after you've struck out in the hotel bar will not get me panting to come over. I'll be in my pyjamas by then.
Planning makes sense. I do it when I travel, so unsure why others don't. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Maybe it'd help going on cam as photos can be very misleading.
A lot of attraction is about the way someone smiles or moves or the sound of their voice. You can't get that from a photo. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do travel and have travelled. And will do so again.
As said above planning is key.
Also, there's no such thing (in my mind) ever as a guaranteed conclusion on here, but I'd travel if the person was worth travelling for.
I'd never do so on minimal communication or interest.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i prefer to be the one travelling
i find it easy and usually make a weekend out of it .
meet up with friends as well
so its only a problem if its let to be one .
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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago
Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria |
"So if they travelled to your area on business or pleasure. For example I'm probably going to be in London and the South Coast more cause it's very easy to get there from here."
It's in my profile that I won't meet socially unless someone is within half an hours drive of me for much the same reasons NN posted...that hasn't stopped me having fun as there's plenty of folk visit the Lakes and a good few contractors working in this area. Also, I travel a bit with the Wyrd one for club meets, and I've been down to London a coupla times recently so have met up with old friends and made new ones too...if someone is in my area for business, then I'll likely meet up for a drink if the message exchange goes ok |
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I always meet for a coffee first for a no pressure chance to decide if we.both want to take things further. I do regularly turn people down who offer to travel a long distance because I turn down at least 50% of those I meet for coffee.
If a guy is in my area and fancies having a no guarantees coffee/drink then by all means. But when this has happened I've had guys cancel just before when they either a) realise I really do mean no guarantees or b) someone else is offering a definite shag meet.
Funnily I often get messaged by these guys again when they discover that definite shag meets are either hard to come by or end up being a 54 yr old call Bernard or a no show. |
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"We don't let distance become a deciding factor or a problem. We see it as an opportunity...............to visit new towns/cities, we like to travel anyway so why not make the most of it. If some hot sex comes into the equation as well..........perfect. If not, we've discovered somewhere we might not have visited otherwise."
absolutely, make a day or weekend out of it and enjoy the moment
I have friends I have met on here that live 100 miles away
quite happy to book a room, meet socially, and if it doesn't work out,
then just enjoy a new place to visit! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't let distance become a deciding factor or a problem. We see it as an opportunity...............to visit new towns/cities, we like to travel anyway so why not make the most of it. If some hot sex comes into the equation as well..........perfect. If not, we've discovered somewhere we might not have visited otherwise.
absolutely, make a day or weekend out of it and enjoy the moment
I have friends I have met on here that live 100 miles away
quite happy to book a room, meet socially, and if it doesn't work out,
then just enjoy a new place to visit!"
I love to travel for meets. It really doesn't matter to me if it's brief or social . At the very least I get to spend time getting to know a different place and sample a nice hotel! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I live way up North, I do get the chance to travel to the central area of Scotland also as I am from leeds I am often down in Yorkshire...distance isn't really an issue...I would travel when I can...locally it aint to bad.
So to answer the question no distance isn't an issue for me. Although it can be a tad frustrating. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes its an problem, everyone I want to have fun with live to far.
Penge where I live, is like isle of man, just no one near. Is it down to demographics or fate? lol  . |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
I'd like to travel more often, but sadly I can't due to my job. I reckon that it would be loads of fun if I could and as others have said, travelling on the mainland in the Uk is pretty straightforward. . |
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It all depends on the volume of mail in your inbox. If someone's overloaded, there's a ton of localish people messaging and a few from a long distance, it's possible that long distance users will not get so much attention. Without attention, then a user is going to struggle to get long distance meets more than users who are within the normal meeting distance that's selected.
A long distance user would never appear in searches either, if people look for, say, 20 miles or so. So from others searching for people as well as from you being far away, there are a few factors that are working against you, on top of the other reasons that people have pointed out. |
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