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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm newish to swinging (fem part of couple) and he isn't. We set our rules up and sometimes they work and sometimes they don't. We've kind of negotiated back and forth what we both want and what we both are comfortable with.
I guess I'm asking experienced swingers if they constantly have to renegotiate. Constantly change boundaries. And how long it takes to get in a rhythm of it all.
What happens if your rules get broken?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm newish to swinging (fem part of couple) and he isn't. We set our rules up and sometimes they work and sometimes they don't. We've kind of negotiated back and forth what we both want and what we both are comfortable with.
I guess I'm asking experienced swingers if they constantly have to renegotiate. Constantly change boundaries. And how long it takes to get in a rhythm of it all.
What happens if your rules get broken?
"
I may be wrong but it sounds as if you aren't that committed to swinging, you are just going along with what your partner wants. That way lies disaster especially when you talk about rules. It should be mutual agreement not imposed rules, one person on the other. Think you may need to consider if this is really what you want  |
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Most rules we set out with have been changed as we settled in to the lifestyle.
Its what you feel comfortable with and you both have to agree to the said rules during meets or it can cause havoc.
Small steps...  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I'm newish to swinging (fem part of couple) and he isn't. We set our rules up and sometimes they work and sometimes they don't. We've kind of negotiated back and forth what we both want and what we both are comfortable with.
I guess I'm asking experienced swingers if they constantly have to renegotiate. Constantly change boundaries. And how long it takes to get in a rhythm of it all.
What happens if your rules get broken?
I may be wrong but it sounds as if you aren't that committed to swinging, you are just going along with what your partner wants. That way lies disaster especially when you talk about rules. It should be mutual agreement not imposed rules, one person on the other. Think you may need to consider if this is really what you want "
I'm committed to making him happy. I'm committed to his lifestyle. It's a challenge and I was after advice. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Most rules we set out with have been changed as we settled in to the lifestyle.
Its what you feel comfortable with and you both have to agree to the said rules during meets or it can cause havoc.
Small steps... "
Small steps is good advice x |
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