FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > getting you wife into swinging
getting you wife into swinging
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By *oger me OP Man
over a year ago
somewhere |
Ok guys and gals here's the situation. When my wife has had a few beers she goes on about having a threesome or moresome and gets really turned on talking about it. But I'm not sure about mentioning it when she's sober, and how I go about a) mentioning it and b) sorting it ?
Any ideas? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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just come out with it sometime, see what she says, if she really fancies the idea then she go for it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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take it she doesnt know your on here? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You could tell her about the meets you've had, maybe she'd like to hear? |
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Well you where able to discuss with her you being on a swinging site as a single guy so guess it should be easy to approach it |
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By *oger me OP Man
over a year ago
somewhere |
Ok guys I'm not on here to be judged just want some advice on the situation I asked about, thanks for the comments |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Speak to her when she not had a beer..
Take it she does not know you are swinging as a single male? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ok guys I'm not on here to be judged just want some advice on the situation I asked about, thanks for the comments "
im afraid posting on a forum opens you up to beeing judged, thats just life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Im not judging, but it's the truth - I can't think of anything worse than trying to get my wife into swinging when I'm already doing it behind her back.
It's a different thing to approach it as a new couple. |
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By *oger me OP Man
over a year ago
somewhere |
Yeah true I suppose I was a little naive |
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By *b430Man
over a year ago
Tayside |
"***Fuss Puss dons tin hat***"
The Air Raid Shelter will be a better idea I think
I'm holding the door open for ya!  |
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Ask her what her fantasies are. We had that conversation about 10 years ago and it turned out that we had the same ones. Mine was to see Mrs PnJ with another woman and Mrs PnJs was to be with another woman. I was definitely the more shocked of the two of us and asked if we should try and sort something out, she said yes and the rest is history.
xxxP&Jxxx  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ok guys I'm not on here to be judged just want some advice on the situation I asked about, thanks for the comments "
.... Advice you say ? well you asked so our advice is STOP cheating on your wife... 
* gets bk in coffin * |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Ok guys I'm not on here to be judged just want some advice on the situation I asked about, thanks for the comments "
you may not like what other people have said.... but they certainly have a point!!
I am guessing that if you are going to approach her about it..then you are going to be honest with her about having been on here as a single guy and having meets....
after all... if you what honest advice about how the proceed, then shouldn't you be honest with her.....
I think that is very fair!!!! |
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By *oger me OP Man
over a year ago
somewhere |
Ok forget it I will remember not to post on here again unless I want some life coaching and advice from people that have no idea ! Thought people on here may have been a little bit more mature , guess not.
I don't have a problem with what I'm doing and dont need telling its wrong , I Know ! So lay off |
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"Ok forget it I will remember not to post on here again unless I want some life coaching and advice from people that have no idea ! Thought people on here may have been a little bit more mature , guess not.
I don't have a problem with what I'm doing and dont need telling its wrong , I Know ! So lay off "
You asked for advice and got advice, just cause you dont like it doesnt mean it wasnt advice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ok forget it I will remember not to post on here again unless I want some life coaching and advice from people that have no idea ! Thought people on here may have been a little bit more mature , guess not.
I don't have a problem with what I'm doing and dont need telling its wrong , I Know ! So lay off "
I think your wife might have a problem with what your doing.... |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
Ok, fair enough you dont wish to be judged but as others have said people cheating on these sites gets alot of people very annoyed and I believe there are sites for people that wish to do that and wish they would go to that site.
Ok now for constructive advice.
Is your marriage strong enough to 1 tell her your on site and 2 that you have had some meets. 3 is she gonna kill/divorce you when she finds out that you have done this behind her back.
4 sorry but can you live with yourself if you dont tell her and be just another cheating scumbag(sorry back to normal opinions)
If she is already basically swinging when piddled then maybe you wont have such a hard time when you do tell her.
But to only be able to have a 3 some when piddled isnt good and not fair on the people you BOTH may meet.
Have a decent chat with her and be honest with everything that has happened and what you would like and ask what she would like. Explain about the site and how it works as you clearly know.
If she turns around and tells you no then tough luck mate, you should be honest with your wife as that is fair.
Just mention it to her and see what happoens but dont be surprised that she may want your bollocks on a plate for playing away from home.
Good luck as think your going to need it.
I would say keep us informed but have a feling you as many other cheating men who post questions like yours on here will dissapear as cant image you will actually stand up and be honest an risk your marriage as already been cheating.
But if you do decide to be honest then we would love to hear no doubt how it went x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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She might already have an idea you are swinging behind her back and that could be why she brings it up when she had a few drinks? |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
Just read his last message once I out on my forum, ok not a surprising answer.
Mate can I now have your wifes number so I can maybe show her how it feels and maybe be a bit more honest with her. |
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By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago
east cheshire |
LMAO I love it when they get all upitty when berated for cheating.
Get your wife on here as a single fem i know lots of lovely fit single guys who will give her a reeeeeet good tuppin |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think you guys were a bit harsh on the guy. While I don't condone doing it behind his wife's back . That's not what he asked about. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Ok forget it I will remember not to post on here again unless I want some life coaching and advice from people that have no idea ! Thought people on here may have been a little bit more mature , guess not.
I don't have a problem with what I'm doing and dont need telling its wrong , I Know ! So lay off "
hang on, did you asked for advice????
you got a lot of advice, but you didn't like what people were telling you......doesn't mean the advice isn't as relevant! and you seem to be taking it in one ear and going straight out the other!!
I think a lot of what has been said is very valid... especially in regards to honesty....
you see to think that it doesn't
people here are very mature, but what your find is that "deception by omission" isn't going to do you any favours at all......
last line of your profile says "I'm genuine....." for me and I am guessing a lot of people reading this, being truthful and being honest IS part of being genuine............. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just show her the profile you have had on here for the last year or more and the meets you have had and she will soon realise that she is married to a swinger and can be one herself and have her own single woman profile. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"I think you guys were a bit harsh on the guy. While I don't condone doing it behind his wife's back . That's not what he asked about."
I am going to disagree with you....
its all part of one big picture..... if he had been here and not met anyone then I'd agree with you.... by all means show her the profile, show her the site and see how she likes it as well as discussing it with her.....
but he has met up with people behind her back.... so what was he going to this? miraclously disappear? |
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By *mf4BxJCouple
over a year ago
edinburgh |
I think you need to take a step back and stop cheating on your wife and put some of that energy into her. Spend some time making her feel sexy and allow her to explore her fantasies. Surely things can't be that stale in the bedroom that you need to play away and she needs to be tipsy before she can open up to you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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'i am genuine, unlike a few on here and am very descrete'
above quote made me chuckle |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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just take her to a club and see how far she wants to go.good luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I don't have a problem with what I'm doing and dont need telling its wrong , I Know ! So lay off "
How lucky your wife is to have someone who cares about her so much. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I guess that will teach him to ask a question on a forum.
Judges, juries and executioners in 1 hour flat lol |
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By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago
east cheshire |
"I guess that will teach him to ask a question on a forum.
Judges, juries and executioners in 1 hour flat lol "
slacking of late |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dear OP pick your toys up and put the back in the pram.
You stood up and asked total strangers to give you advice. And that's what happened. What really got your panties in a bunch is that they didn't tell you what you wanted to hear.
Deal with it.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Judges, juries and executioners in 1 hour flat lol "
'i am genuine, unlike a few on here and am very descrete'
I just chuckled to the fact that he may have judged others with the above comment..
what he does with or without his wife is nowt to do with me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Judges, juries and executioners in 1 hour flat lol
'i am genuine, unlike a few on here and am very descrete'
I just chuckled to the fact that he may have judged others with the above comment..
what he does with or without his wife is nowt to do with me. "
He is probably very discrete, what with having a wife and all!
I do wonder though. I mean I know some threads get heated and personal and often for silly little reasons caused by bickering between two or more posters but when I see threads like these... it just makes me wonder, seriously wonder, about what actually goes on in people's minds. Like, do they really think they'll only get the advice they want?
Forums, of all types should come with a warning:
"Posting here is putting a target on your forehead and asking for people to take aim" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ok guys I'm not on here to be judged just want some advice on the situation I asked about, thanks for the comments "
im not sure if this helps you but your situation is very similar to the one my husband was in
he wanted to try group sex but didnt feel sure about coming out with it directly
so for weeks and weeks he talked about it during our sex sessions and because i thought he was just being a dirty bugger i played along
after one particular session we were lying there in the aftermath and he turned over to me and asked me if i would consider it for real
i told him at the time that those sort of things didnt really happen
he showed me i was wrong and we talked and talked and took it one step at a time
good luck xxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
i told him at the time that those sort of things didnt really happen"
You sound like a single man having no luck, hehe  |
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"I guess that will teach him to ask a question on a forum.
Judges, juries and executioners in 1 hour flat lol
slacking of late "
Sorry about that, I was out. |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
bigtits(am loving the profile name) I am please for you and your husband it all worked out but the Op is doing it behind her back which I hope that didnt happen to you. But of course I know your aware of that, your an example of how it can work out.
The forums are open and posts like this will get people heated.
Maybe the OP didnt realsise when he asked the question he would get judged,slammed and not praised for asking the question and patted on the back for asking it.
Maybe yes he is used to having meets but maybe not aware that if you ask a question dont be surprised in the answer he gets. Wether he likes it or not.
I think he will vanish licking his wounds thiking they are all judging me and dont understand.
For every one that carries on cheating as I expect he will another will join and do the same. See the same question again soon no doubt.
Funny life with funny people eh lol |
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When she's had a couple of drinks, get her to sign up here... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"bigtits(am loving the profile name) I am please for you and your husband it all worked out but the Op is doing it behind her back which I hope that didnt happen to you. But of course I know your aware of that, your an example of how it can work out.
The forums are open and posts like this will get people heated
Maybe the OP didnt realsise when he asked the question he would get judged,slammed and not praised for asking the question and patted on the back for asking it.
Maybe yes he is used to having meets but maybe not aware that if you ask a question dont be surprised in the answer he gets. Wether he likes it or not.
I think he will vanish licking his wounds thiking they are all judging me and dont understand.
For every one that carries on cheating as I expect he will another will join and do the same. See the same question again soon no doubt.
Funny life with funny people eh lol"
oh yes it is a funny life we are all so different
it did work out for us and no he didnt go off else where before hand - well not that i am aware of anyway!
i thought he was getting enough of the 'big picture' from the group - i thought i would sort of leave my view out of it and let him know how David approached it with me xxx |
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By *b430Man
over a year ago
Tayside |
Is it safe to come out of the air raid shelter yet? |
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"Is it safe to come out of the air raid shelter yet? "
Yes, but don't wander off, there may be another wave at any moment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would have thought swingres were open minded sorts. Turns out whenever there is a "blue touch paper" post like this one, they turn into judgmental Puritans.
I don't understand why people think internet forums are fair game to put the boot in. Seems to be the way of things, but I feel it's better not to bother contributing when people enjoy being nasty.
As I like to say, some people are single for a reason - they ain't very nice.
love and peace etc... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it safe to come out of the air raid shelter yet? "
lol  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would have thought swingres were open minded sorts. Turns out whenever there is a "blue touch paper" post like this one, they turn into judgmental Puritans.
I don't understand why people think internet forums are fair game to put the boot in. Seems to be the way of things, but I feel it's better not to bother contributing when people enjoy being nasty.
As I like to say, some people are single for a reason - they ain't very nice.
love and peace etc..."
very fair point.  |
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"I would have thought swingres were open minded sorts. Turns out whenever there is a "blue touch paper" post like this one, they turn into judgmental Puritans.
I don't understand why people think internet forums are fair game to put the boot in. Seems to be the way of things, but I feel it's better not to bother contributing when people enjoy being nasty.
As I like to say, some people are single for a reason - they ain't very nice.
love and peace etc..."
Well said Iain...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
I would just like to know how it must feel to be soooo perfect that I would be in a position to judge others
I don't agree with cheating but im sure that those that do cheat would be more than aware of any consequences
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"I would have thought swingres were open minded sorts. Turns out whenever there is a "blue touch paper" post like this one, they turn into judgmental Puritans.
I don't understand why people think internet forums are fair game to put the boot in. Seems to be the way of things, but I feel it's better not to bother contributing when people enjoy being nasty.
As I like to say, some people are single for a reason - they ain't very nice.
love and peace etc..."
swingers are open minded people.....
are you opened minded to the point of helping someone that in there own words said "I don't have a problem with what I'm doing and dont need telling its wrong" then fine, your conscience.... however it doesn't make people judgemental... and I take offence to that!!!!
so you called those people who didn't help him judgemental... Ironic because you did exactly the same thing...
I really hope this thread is locked, because it now serves no purpose.....
I hope this thread is closed..... |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
Iain, very true but this scene is about a number of things sex fun friendship but also honesty and respect.
People are very opinionated in relation to people cheating then asking advice on an open forum about how to broach the subject of telling the wife he has been cheating and then how to ask her if she wants to do it too.
If you think the replys are a bit harsh or whatever or have opinions on the people and why they are single themselves which I assume is connected to their comments on the OPs situation then I think thats pretty crap fraid.
If someone is gonna come on and praise the OP to say well done for asking the question of how to get his wife into it and for cheating on the wife. Or not necessarily praise him but not think its a pretty crap situation but then question the people who give replys like for god sake are you not thinking of your wife as you have clearly had meets without her knowing. Are you saying maybe that they are single for a reason and judging them???? What on earth.
Sorry but if you think a person cheating on their wife is maybe a better person than the majority of posters on here thinking the man has behaved pretty crap and has bad morals then its pretty bad.
The people writing with their heart thinking the guy is pretty bad are being honest and have some morals and believe in some honesty.
Those that come on the site and say I cheat how do I carry on doing it or for assistance will get torn to pieces. Tough.
Find a site where everyone is a lying cheating person then put the same question in the forum on there and everyone will ooo and ahhh poor thing and blow smoke up his botty.
If you think maybe I or others are single for a reason then maybe we are but better than being with a lying cheat of a partner. Been there done that and not going there again.
I will try meet the nice people on here. Lucky so far. |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
Honey you dont need to be so perfect to judge, just have a heart and some morals.
I am no way perfect but wont cheat on a partner and expect praise/help with it.
I also this thread is closed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We all have our own moral compass regardless of life style: you only have to read the comments posted on any given day to know that.
There are people who assume because this is a "sex site" everything goes, but that's not the case.
What other people do is NOT my business.
I think the OP was naïve in thinking he'd get an "atta boy" from site users: blimey us singles are hardly made welcome at times!
It is sad though that some people take pleasure in being nasty. Ok, the OP won't win husband of the year and he's someone I'd never meet, but hey...live and let live! |
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By *b430Man
over a year ago
Tayside |
At last it's safe to come out of the shelter it was getting quite lonely in there  |
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