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Lying about sexuality
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So, I'm actively looking for men who like men and I think I make this reasonably clear on my profile.
I'd say that most men who contact me say they are straight on their profile but then go on to tell me via private message that they're also into men.
If I enquire as to the reason that they've been less than honest, they usually say that basically it's to hedge their bets because some women won't sleep with men on here who like other men.
So I guess my question is this - does anyone else find this kind of lying as much of a turn off as I do?
I wonder if perhaps it's because I've worked very hard in my own life to be open and honest with everyone I meet about things like my pansexuality and my non-monogamy, so when I see people lying about being bi/pansexual on profiles it just rubs me up the wrong way and frustrates me - if more people were open and honest it would make the world a better place and easier for everyone else to come out and be themselves! It could also be because I'm a dirty student who studies things like gender and sexuality, who knows! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dunno. I'm pretty open and honest as well, but i'd never be open and honest if it hurt someone else to do that, i'd also never lie if i knew it would hurt someone.
Some lies i can overlook, and can understand. Is not knowing the truth really going to harm someone else? Philosophically, no it isn't. Only when you find out the truth is when you are hurt about the lie.
Some lies are selfish, just as some truths are. The world wouldn't be a better place if everyone was honest, but we would be more intelligent and less emotionally based if it was (imo). |
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By *ipsTeaserCouple
over a year ago
here and there, thereabouts |
I really don't understand people who do this. I mean, I understand that they do it so that certain women who would otherwise say no will potentially look at them- but by same token they exclude themselves from other people who would want them if they were open in the first place!
It's the lying side of it that really winds me up. It makes me wonder what else they would lie about in order to get what they want- dishonesty is a big turn off for me.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get this a lot too and it really puts me off, especially when they tell me it's because stating openly they're bi would deter some women on this site and they don't want to harm their chances.
If they're not honest about it then I can't respect them, so it's a deal breaker for me. |
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"I get this a lot too and it really puts me off, especially when they tell me it's because stating openly they're bi would deter some women on this site and they don't want to harm their chances.
If they're not honest about it then I can't respect them, so it's a deal breaker for me."
 Exactly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight. When guys message me claiming "Straight" then their veris have a TS/TV as a meet, i ask them why they say "Straight". They always reply with the grossest message that goe like this.
"There was noone else available and i was horny. I didn't fuck it (yes it) i just let it suck my dick. Actually it makes me kinda sick i did it."
Now how charming i that? I often wonder what their veri would think if they saw how these "Straight" guys talked about them. |
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By *aisy2012Couple
over a year ago
everywhere |
Does also beg the question why do women/couples say they won't meet bi or bi-curious men?
They think that anyone who meets men is automatically disease-ridden or limp-wristed?
If everyone was as adult as they should be to be on here they ought to appreciate being bi isn't ACTUALLY an imperative to jump on a guy if he has his cock out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Does not bother me, I have on my profile I'm looking for bi males for 3sums and i get loads of mail from bi men who state straight on their profile, so what, I'm after sex and so long as i get a couple of bi men that's all u care about, I expect nothing from people on here, trust and respect is earned not given out to strangers on sex sites |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight."
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex. |
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We find this a massive turn off! We have put up status's asking for bi men, nearly everyone who replies tells us they are bi, then we read there profile and 80% of the time it says they are straight!!!!! Why lie? Pisses us right off! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex."
Becasue i have preferences, just like you do, unless you fuck everyone who offers you sex? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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guys on here are attracted to tg's and don't see that as being gay,personally I could,nt care what they call em selves.
if some one finds me attractive and I find them attractive ,who cares.
funny how people cant get their head round that.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It doesn't bother me what people say to get sex. I meet the people who I'm attracted to after talking to them. If they ask me if I meet bi men I tell them I do. If they don't like that they can move on. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Becasue i have preferences, just like you do, unless you fuck everyone who offers you sex?"
But a preference for 'straight' isn't the same as a preference for 'blonde' or being 'intelligent'. Being blonde (for example) makes you look different. Being intelligent makes you come across differently. Being bisexual... well... it doesn't make any different at all when you're fucking someone. |
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"guys on here are attracted to tg's and don't see that as being gay,personally I could,nt care what they call em selves.
if some one finds me attractive and I find them attractive ,who cares.
funny how people cant get their head round that.
"
Can't argue with this! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Becasue i have preferences, just like you do, unless you fuck everyone who offers you sex?
But a preference for 'straight' isn't the same as a preference for 'blonde' or being 'intelligent'. Being blonde (for example) makes you look different. Being intelligent makes you come across differently. Being bisexual... well... it doesn't make any different at all when you're fucking someone."
Having slept with bisexual men and straight men, yes there is a difference. And again, it' my preference. Having a different sexuality doesn't make a difference when you're fucking someone? That's a ridiculous statement! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Having slept with bisexual men and straight men, yes there is a difference."
I'm curious as to how that manifests itself when you're having sex?
Because I have partners who are both straight and gay, (and have had many of each in the past) and I can't tell what someones preferences are from the way they behave in bed with me.
Just interested. As I said, I'm a gender and sexualities student and it's not something that I've personally read about or felt myself. |
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I completely agree. I hate when people are dishonest. It's clear most of the time they are not into men tii as they don't have a single verification from a man.
I think this is one place where you are free ti be open about your sensuality. It is wrong when men put straight if the are bi so they get more women that don't do bi. Women are allowed to not want ti be with a man that has been with other men |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Having slept with bisexual men and straight men, yes there is a difference.
I'm curious as to how that manifests itself when you're having sex?
Because I have partners who are both straight and gay, (and have had many of each in the past) and I can't tell what someones preferences are from the way they behave in bed with me.
Just interested. As I said, I'm a gender and sexualities student and it's not something that I've personally read about or felt myself."
, I'm a gender and sexualities student
Scuse my ignorance but what is that young lady? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Having slept with bisexual men and straight men, yes there is a difference.
I'm curious as to how that manifests itself when you're having sex?
Because I have partners who are both straight and gay, (and have had many of each in the past) and I can't tell what someones preferences are from the way they behave in bed with me.
Just interested. As I said, I'm a gender and sexualities student and it's not something that I've personally read about or felt myself."
So you don't have experience in the situation but you're happy to infer that i'm homophobic? And you've slept with gay men? Gay men don't sleep with women. That would make them bi men. As someone who studies gender and sexuality i suggest you get yourself down to your local LGBT meeting. We have them in Glasgow twice a week. Maybe then you'll get a real understanding of what i'm talking about. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am straight, I dont find men or playing with them a turn on, yes I have tested my sexuality in the past,
However, if I'm with a couple and they want to play bi it would not bother meplaying along, it may not turn me on but its not always about my own needs
I know people will say well thats bi, but not in my eyes, I dont go looking for guys, they don't turn me on at all but it doesnt turn me off either |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex."
Im fully bi and its on my profile i cant understand the whole pretending to be bi thing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does not bother me, I have on my profile I'm looking for bi males for 3sums and i get loads of mail from bi men who state straight on their profile, so what, I'm after sex and so long as i get a couple of bi men that's all u care about, I expect nothing from people on here, trust and respect is earned not given out to strangers on sex sites "
Good point about not being open with strangers.
I think another reason why people don't like liars who might be being honest with them, well you have to work out for yourself what they are and that can be impossible, so being open makes for an easier life for the person being lied/truthed to.
For NSA it doesn't really matter if they're honest to others or not. If you're after a bi guy who hides it but tells you he is then there is no problem, apart from if he is actually lying to you and really isn't bi.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some people won't kiss when swinging and some people will only soft swap.
Perhaps participating in bisexuality activities is something they consider to be more private.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its fucking simple,guys are scared to admit their bisexual,as society is still fucked up by religion and Victorian values,fuck it this is the 21st century move on from that shit. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Having slept with bisexual men and straight men, yes there is a difference.
I'm curious as to how that manifests itself when you're having sex?
Because I have partners who are both straight and gay, (and have had many of each in the past) and I can't tell what someones preferences are from the way they behave in bed with me.
Just interested. As I said, I'm a gender and sexualities student and it's not something that I've personally read about or felt myself.
So you don't have experience in the situation but you're happy to infer that i'm homophobic? And you've slept with gay men? Gay men don't sleep with women. That would make them bi men. As someone who studies gender and sexuality i suggest you get yourself down to your local LGBT meeting. We have them in Glasgow twice a week. Maybe then you'll get a real understanding of what i'm talking about."
Actually I'm genderqueer. I play with some men as men.
It should really have read straight and pan men, but I typed gay mistake. The point still stands though, I've slept with men who identify as straight, bisexual, pansexual and gay. There's no discernable 'thing' that each category does. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Having slept with bisexual men and straight men, yes there is a difference.
I'm curious as to how that manifests itself when you're having sex?
Because I have partners who are both straight and gay, (and have had many of each in the past) and I can't tell what someones preferences are from the way they behave in bed with me.
Just interested. As I said, I'm a gender and sexualities student and it's not something that I've personally read about or felt myself.
So you don't have experience in the situation but you're happy to infer that i'm homophobic? And you've slept with gay men? Gay men don't sleep with women. That would make them bi men. As someone who studies gender and sexuality i suggest you get yourself down to your local LGBT meeting. We have them in Glasgow twice a week. Maybe then you'll get a real understanding of what i'm talking about.
Actually I'm genderqueer. I play with some men as men.
It should really have read straight and pan men, but I typed gay mistake. The point still stands though, I've slept with men who identify as straight, bisexual, pansexual and gay. There's no discernable 'thing' that each category does."
Everyone's an individual and I think that my likes, dislikes, kinks and fetishes are far more complex than my sexuality and I don't think they would change if I started sleeping with men and women or just men.
Even if you limited it to one sexuality there would still be huge differences between individuals. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Having slept with bisexual men and straight men, yes there is a difference.
I'm curious as to how that manifests itself when you're having sex?
Because I have partners who are both straight and gay, (and have had many of each in the past) and I can't tell what someones preferences are from the way they behave in bed with me.
Just interested. As I said, I'm a gender and sexualities student and it's not something that I've personally read about or felt myself.
So you don't have experience in the situation but you're happy to infer that i'm homophobic? And you've slept with gay men? Gay men don't sleep with women. That would make them bi men. As someone who studies gender and sexuality i suggest you get yourself down to your local LGBT meeting. We have them in Glasgow twice a week. Maybe then you'll get a real understanding of what i'm talking about.
Actually I'm genderqueer. I play with some men as men.
It should really have read straight and pan men, but I typed gay mistake. The point still stands though, I've slept with men who identify as straight, bisexual, pansexual and gay. There's no discernable 'thing' that each category does."
Maybe you aren't as sexually perceptive as me. Maybe the men you sleep with that claim to be bi, aren't. this thread did start after all with you saying people lie about it. Either way, i know the difference  |
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When i was with my x gf we met a few men who had straight on tbeir profile, but claimed to be bi when messaging. Turned out they wernt bi and just after fucking the gf. Needless to say, they didnt stay long |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Having slept with bisexual men and straight men, yes there is a difference.
I'm curious as to how that manifests itself when you're having sex?
Because I have partners who are both straight and gay, (and have had many of each in the past) and I can't tell what someones preferences are from the way they behave in bed with me.
Just interested. As I said, I'm a gender and sexualities student and it's not something that I've personally read about or felt myself.
So you don't have experience in the situation but you're happy to infer that i'm homophobic? And you've slept with gay men? Gay men don't sleep with women. That would make them bi men. As someone who studies gender and sexuality i suggest you get yourself down to your local LGBT meeting. We have them in Glasgow twice a week. Maybe then you'll get a real understanding of what i'm talking about.
Actually I'm genderqueer. I play with some men as men.
It should really have read straight and pan men, but I typed gay mistake. The point still stands though, I've slept with men who identify as straight, bisexual, pansexual and gay. There's no discernable 'thing' that each category does."
Oh and it's still not nice to say i'm homophobic because i don't leep with bi men. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Either way, i know the difference "
Is it a physical sensation? I mean, do they put their penises in you differently?
I just genuinely don't understand why it feels different. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Scuse my ignorance but what is that young lady?"
I'd prefer that you didn't patronise me by calling me 'young lady'... however...
I'm studying for a degree where part of my specialism is in the relationship between culture, gender and sexuality. |
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"
Having slept with bisexual men and straight men, yes there is a difference.
I'm curious as to how that manifests itself when you're having sex?
Because I have partners who are both straight and gay, (and have had many of each in the past) and I can't tell what someones preferences are from the way they behave in bed with me.
Just interested. As I said, I'm a gender and sexualities student and it's not something that I've personally read about or felt myself.
So you don't have experience in the situation but you're happy to infer that i'm homophobic? And you've slept with gay men? Gay men don't sleep with women. That would make them bi men. As someone who studies gender and sexuality i suggest you get yourself down to your local LGBT meeting. We have them in Glasgow twice a week. Maybe then you'll get a real understanding of what i'm talking about.
Actually I'm genderqueer. I play with some men as men.
It should really have read straight and pan men, but I typed gay mistake. The point still stands though, I've slept with men who identify as straight, bisexual, pansexual and gay. There's no discernable 'thing' that each category does.
Maybe you aren't as sexually perceptive as me. Maybe the men you sleep with that claim to be bi, aren't. this thread did start after all with you saying people lie about it. Either way, i know the difference "
Genuine question. How do you know?
I have slept with many men and women and unless they specifically told me how they identified their sexuality I wouldn't be so confident in declaring that I knew if they were straight, bi, gay and so on and so forth.
I'm with the OP as I don't understand at all why some individuals would not be interested in a bi - sexual man. But then again I am often bewildered by many things on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Either way, i know the difference
Is it a physical sensation? I mean, do they put their penises in you differently?
I just genuinely don't understand why it feels different."
As i said, i must be more sexually perceptive than you. |
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"
Either way, i know the difference
Is it a physical sensation? I mean, do they put their penises in you differently?
I just genuinely don't understand why it feels different.
As i said, i must be more sexually perceptive than you. "
Yes, more than all of us clearly. So nothing specific then? |
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By *ipsTeaserCouple
over a year ago
here and there, thereabouts |
"
Becasue i have preferences, just like you do, unless you fuck everyone who offers you sex?
But a preference for 'straight' isn't the same as a preference for 'blonde' or being 'intelligent'. Being blonde (for example) makes you look different. Being intelligent makes you come across differently. Being bisexual... well... it doesn't make any different at all when you're fucking someone."
Surely from an attraction point of view it does? maybe not for you,but for others it may.
As an aside, Our profile says no bi guys, not because Either of us have a problem with bi guys but because bugs is straight and does not wish bi play to be a part of our meets and we don't wish someone to 'play straight' on our account. It's our preference and that is something on this site in particular people should be open minded enough to understand. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Either way, i know the difference
Is it a physical sensation? I mean, do they put their penises in you differently?
I just genuinely don't understand why it feels different.
As i said, i must be more sexually perceptive than you.
Yes, more than all of us clearly. So nothing specific then? "
Just because i know the difference doesn't mean i need to put it on a forum. And just because you haven't experienced it doesn't mean it's not there. She can be happy calling me a homophobe and i'll be happy knowing my straight men from my bi ones. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Becasue i have preferences, just like you do, unless you fuck everyone who offers you sex?
But a preference for 'straight' isn't the same as a preference for 'blonde' or being 'intelligent'. Being blonde (for example) makes you look different. Being intelligent makes you come across differently. Being bisexual... well... it doesn't make any different at all when you're fucking someone.
Surely from an attraction point of view it does? maybe not for you,but for others it may.
As an aside, Our profile says no bi guys, not because Either of us have a problem with bi guys but because bugs is straight and does not wish bi play to be a part of our meets and we don't wish someone to 'play straight' on our account. It's our preference and that is something on this site in particular people should be open minded enough to understand."
I can understand that to an extent (although, personally for me I wouldn't see the point in a threesome unless everyone was playing together). But it seems to be that most guys are saying it to keep favour with the single women... where there would be no other man in bed with them. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
Either way, i know the difference
Is it a physical sensation? I mean, do they put their penises in you differently?
I just genuinely don't understand why it feels different.
As i said, i must be more sexually perceptive than you.
Yes, more than all of us clearly. So nothing specific then?
Just because i know the difference doesn't mean i need to put it on a forum. And just because you haven't experienced it doesn't mean it's not there. She can be happy calling me a homophobe and i'll be happy knowing my straight men from my bi ones. "
Well... got to be honest... I don't think that straight, bisexual or gay men all move their penises in and out in the same way as everyone else with the same sexuality as them.
So I'm still going to keep to my opinion that you're a touch homophobic... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So, I'm actively looking for men who like men and I think I make this reasonably clear on my profile.
I'd say that most men who contact me say they are straight on their profile but then go on to tell me via private message that they're also into men.
If I enquire as to the reason that they've been less than honest, they usually say that basically it's to hedge their bets because some women won't sleep with men on here who like other men.
So I guess my question is this - does anyone else find this kind of lying as much of a turn off as I do?
I wonder if perhaps it's because I've worked very hard in my own life to be open and honest with everyone I meet about things like my pansexuality and my non-monogamy, so when I see people lying about being bi/pansexual on profiles it just rubs me up the wrong way and frustrates me - if more people were open and honest it would make the world a better place and easier for everyone else to come out and be themselves! It could also be because I'm a dirty student who studies things like gender and sexuality, who knows!"
Its those pesky transexuals that are confuddling the site!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Either way, i know the difference
Is it a physical sensation? I mean, do they put their penises in you differently?
I just genuinely don't understand why it feels different.
As i said, i must be more sexually perceptive than you.
Yes, more than all of us clearly. So nothing specific then?
Just because i know the difference doesn't mean i need to put it on a forum. And just because you haven't experienced it doesn't mean it's not there. She can be happy calling me a homophobe and i'll be happy knowing my straight men from my bi ones.
Well... got to be honest... I don't think that straight, bisexual or gay men all move their penises in and out in the same way as everyone else with the same sexuality as them.
So I'm still going to keep to my opinion that you're a touch homophobic..."
wow! Well that explains all the meets you've had on here. |
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By *ipsTeaserCouple
over a year ago
here and there, thereabouts |
"
Becasue i have preferences, just like you do, unless you fuck everyone who offers you sex?
But a preference for 'straight' isn't the same as a preference for 'blonde' or being 'intelligent'. Being blonde (for example) makes you look different. Being intelligent makes you come across differently. Being bisexual... well... it doesn't make any different at all when you're fucking someone.
Surely from an attraction point of view it does? maybe not for you,but for others it may.
As an aside, Our profile says no bi guys, not because Either of us have a problem with bi guys but because bugs is straight and does not wish bi play to be a part of our meets and we don't wish someone to 'play straight' on our account. It's our preference and that is something on this site in particular people should be open minded enough to understand.
I can understand that to an extent (although, personally for me I wouldn't see the point in a threesome unless everyone was playing together). But it seems to be that most guys are saying it to keep favour with the single women... where there would be no other man in bed with them."
Again, your idea of a threesome is yours and is what you want and enjoy. Others again would be different.
I agree with you that men on here are very contradictory with the way the use or don't use the straight/bi on their profile text as I've previously posted above.
I don't think choosing not to play with bi guys makes you homophobic btw. As someone who has witnessed awful homophobia in action I don't think its a term that should be bandied lightly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Becasue i have preferences, just like you do, unless you fuck everyone who offers you sex?
But a preference for 'straight' isn't the same as a preference for 'blonde' or being 'intelligent'. Being blonde (for example) makes you look different. Being intelligent makes you come across differently. Being bisexual... well... it doesn't make any different at all when you're fucking someone.
Surely from an attraction point of view it does? maybe not for you,but for others it may.
As an aside, Our profile says no bi guys, not because Either of us have a problem with bi guys but because bugs is straight and does not wish bi play to be a part of our meets and we don't wish someone to 'play straight' on our account. It's our preference and that is something on this site in particular people should be open minded enough to understand.
I can understand that to an extent (although, personally for me I wouldn't see the point in a threesome unless everyone was playing together). But it seems to be that most guys are saying it to keep favour with the single women... where there would be no other man in bed with them.
Again, your idea of a threesome is yours and is what you want and enjoy. Others again would be different.
I agree with you that men on here are very contradictory with the way the use or don't use the straight/bi on their profile text as I've previously posted above.
I don't think choosing not to play with bi guys makes you homophobic btw. As someone who has witnessed awful homophobia in action I don't think its a term that should be bandied lightly."
But she studies gender and sexuality at college so she's allowed to call total strangers (who are bisexual btw) homophobic.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think this is an interesting topic. Everyone's ideas are valid and it would be more enjoyable if you debated each others points rather than focusing on the individual who made the point.
I would be honest on my profile if I was gay, straight or bi as I'm on here to find enjoyment for myself.
If I was on a meet and before play started found that my partner(s) had lied on their profile then I may choose to leave however I don't think lying about their sexuality would be a big deal unless they failed to respect my boundaries. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have straight on my profile but in the right circumstances have and will have sex with a woman. What else will I lie about and will men turn me down because of it? |
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By *ipsTeaserCouple
over a year ago
here and there, thereabouts |
"I think this is an interesting topic. Everyone's ideas are valid and it would be more enjoyable if you debated each others points rather than focusing on the individual who made the point.
I would be honest on my profile if I was gay, straight or bi as I'm on here to find enjoyment for myself.
If I was on a meet and before play started found that my partner(s) had lied on their profile then I may choose to leave however I don't think lying about their sexuality would be a big deal unless they failed to respect my boundaries. "
I think people are debating others points. Unfortunately sometimes it gets heated and sometimes things are said without thinking, as it real life.
Sometimes they are people's genuinely held opinions which you cannot Have control over.
I agree with you about the honesty you mention- as I previously posted above its the honesty aspect of it that I have an issue with, not the sexuality.
Therefore, if we found on a meet that someone had lied it would probably result in the meet being bought to a halt. |
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By *ipsTeaserCouple
over a year ago
here and there, thereabouts |
"
Becasue i have preferences, just like you do, unless you fuck everyone who offers you sex?
But a preference for 'straight' isn't the same as a preference for 'blonde' or being 'intelligent'. Being blonde (for example) makes you look different. Being intelligent makes you come across differently. Being bisexual... well... it doesn't make any different at all when you're fucking someone.
Surely from an attraction point of view it does? maybe not for you,but for others it may.
As an aside, Our profile says no bi guys, not because Either of us have a problem with bi guys but because bugs is straight and does not wish bi play to be a part of our meets and we don't wish someone to 'play straight' on our account. It's our preference and that is something on this site in particular people should be open minded enough to understand.
I can understand that to an extent (although, personally for me I wouldn't see the point in a threesome unless everyone was playing together). But it seems to be that most guys are saying it to keep favour with the single women... where there would be no other man in bed with them.
Again, your idea of a threesome is yours and is what you want and enjoy. Others again would be different.
I agree with you that men on here are very contradictory with the way the use or don't use the straight/bi on their profile text as I've previously posted above.
I don't think choosing not to play with bi guys makes you homophobic btw. As someone who has witnessed awful homophobia in action I don't think its a term that should be bandied lightly.
But she studies gender and sexuality at college so she's allowed to call total strangers (who are bisexual btw) homophobic. "
Perhaps a part of her studies is exploring bias? Or perhaps she is new to the course? I can't answer for her.. Or perhaps it's simply how she really feels-which in that particular matter I disagree strongly with btw.You know your truth. |
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I'm bisexual. It says so on my profile. My profile barely says anything though which should tell you quite a lot about me. I'm a bit of an odd bi guy though. Play straight often enough, don't like things up my arse, don't like men unless it's in a sexual situation |
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I have bi cur on my profile.
Because I like trannies.
With a couple, I don't mind bi play, indeed it can be very erotic to know you are doing something that SOME of society still class as wrong.
I'm not really attracted to blokes.
I let men message me and look at my profile because it would be really boring on here otherwise lol.
Being bi cur has of course cost me meets in the past. I don't really care.
I'm here for the fun and I enjoy the forums.
I have to say though, I ALWAYS play safe with men or women. If people who won't have bi guys think 'we are all disease ridden' as previously posted, then no more than the couple or woman who goes with said straight liar and does not play safe.
Does that make sense?
 |
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I think the point being missed here is that sexual preference is more a spectrum than fixed choices.
At one end we have people that only engage in sexual activity with someone of the same gender, and at the other end, people that only do it with someone of the opposite gender.
And every possible combination and degree in between the two!
Moreover, many people will move around within the spectrum (as mentioned on some previous posts).
Maybe the site should have an additional option for sexuality: 'It's complicated', then it would be clear that some clarification was necessary (in private) before a meeting?
In reply to the original question from the OP, I think most people would be more open if the world out there was less judgemental. Chicken and egg situation, really. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Either way, i know the difference
Is it a physical sensation? I mean, do they put their penises in you differently?
I just genuinely don't understand why it feels different.
As i said, i must be more sexually perceptive than you. "
At least half the men u have fucked from this site are at least bi curious!! FACT!! |
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By *ipsTeaserCouple
over a year ago
here and there, thereabouts |
"I think the point being missed here is that sexual preference is more a spectrum than fixed choices.
At one end we have people that only engage in sexual activity with someone of the same gender, and at the other end, people that only do it with someone of the opposite gender.
And every possible combination and degree in between the two!
Moreover, many people will move around within the spectrum (as mentioned on some previous posts).
Maybe the site should have an additional option for sexuality: 'It's complicated', then it would be clear that some clarification was necessary (in private) before a meeting?
In reply to the original question from the OP, I think most people would be more open if the world out there was less judgemental. Chicken and egg situation, really. "
I agree to an extent its a spectrum. That said just because a person is at a different place in that spectrum don't mean they should be judged for it, and it doesn't mean that if you at varying degrees of it yourself it's ok to lie to those looking for a different part of it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex.
Becasue i have preferences, just like you do, unless you fuck everyone who offers you sex?"
|
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"
Either way, i know the difference
Is it a physical sensation? I mean, do they put their penises in you differently?
I just genuinely don't understand why it feels different.
As i said, i must be more sexually perceptive than you.
Yes, more than all of us clearly. So nothing specific then?
Just because i know the difference doesn't mean i need to put it on a forum. And just because you haven't experienced it doesn't mean it's not there. She can be happy calling me a homophobe and i'll be happy knowing my straight men from my bi ones. "
Goodness there's no talking to some people.
Off to start my journey into the sexual psychic arena in order to expand my perceptions. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a bi guy/Tgirl, who plays alone and with my wife.
I've seen her with bi guys and straight guys and there seems to be no corolation between the way they fuck and their sexuality.
Non of my ex's knew I was Bi. Several were quite vocal in their dislike for men with men.
When I have sex with a woman the way I am with her varies in response to the way she in turn responds to me.
As for lying about sexuality; It doesn't really bother me. It would be nice if people felt they could be honest but then that applies to everything in life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We only meet single guys who are bi, and get the same, numerous so called straight guys saying they're really bi.
They nearly all tell us that the reason is because if they state bi on their profile they get inundated with messages from other men wanting to meet.
Very few say it's because other women won't meet them.
interesting how we get given a different reason! |
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By *iccardaTV/TS
over a year ago
Wallasey |
Just look at some of the profiles by women about what they want from a man, far more want a man to be a man whatever that means so easier to conform or lie than say hey i like sex and nice people so their gender is secondary to me
Plus guys just play the angles lol |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Rushden |
Those who put "No Bi Men" on their profiles and are sure they have never met one... How do you know? How can you possibly tell if a guy is Bi if his profile says straight! My profile says straight and that is what I am, but in a situation where all bodies are tangled together, bits may get touched!
Some very good friends, not from this site, of ours are straight on their profile and they are, but in a heap of bodies, he has been known to play with cock within a group of their friends. They told us because we do not judge them. To all intents and purposes, in a normal play situation he is straight!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If they message me saying they are bi, male or femile n their profile says straight, I message them back to say no thanx because of this n block...
I think if your on a swingin site, if you can't be honest about your sexuality, I can't be bothered with you, simples... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We find this a massive turn off! We have put up status's asking for bi men, nearly everyone who replies tells us they are bi, then we read there profile and 80% of the time it says they are straight!!!!! Why lie? Pisses us right off!"
id love to meet you both xx
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"
Having slept with bisexual men and straight men, yes there is a difference."
So let me get this straight, if you were sleeping with a single bloke and didn't know his sexualality, you would know just from his actions???  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Scuse my ignorance but what is that young lady?
I'd prefer that you didn't patronise me by calling me 'young lady'... however...
I'm studying for a degree where part of my specialism is in the relationship between culture, gender and sexuality."
patronise you
Dear god |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have bi on ours as we feel there is not point in lying. I do however feel that is is fine when a woman has bi on her profile because guys (straight or bi) enjoy seeing it and actively encourage it in their partners. A guy puts bi and I think its usually the male have of the couple that has the issue. There was a thread the other day asking women if they liked seein two men engaging in oral and most said yes it was a turn on.
So although it is a personal choice who people choose to meet be it sexuality colour or any other reason. Its the hypocrisy that I find astonishing... the I am not letting some dirty queer touch my old boy which suddenly turns into.. I have always wanted to see my wife with another woman speech!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex."
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
Is that homophobic? I think not.
If someone is caught lying about their sexuality, age, build, marital status or whatever they cannot be surprised that there are consequences. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex.
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
Is that homophobic? I think not.
If someone is caught lying about their sexuality, age, build, marital status or whatever they cannot be surprised that there are consequences."
I know lots of bi and gay guys that fit your description of what she wants.  |
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"When i was with my x gf we met a few men who had straight on tbeir profile, but claimed to be bi when messaging. Turned out they wernt bi and just after fucking the gf. Needless to say, they didnt stay long "
that has happened several times with us. I am honest with them and say my partner is bi but can play straight and they say yeah I'm bi, id love to play with you both then admit when they get here that they don't play with men. It's not like I'm even saying you have to be bi to meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex.
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
Is that homophobic? I think not.
If someone is caught lying about their sexuality, age, build, marital status or whatever they cannot be surprised that there are consequences.
I know lots of bi and gay guys that fit your description of what she wants. "
Not possible. Physically possibly but otherwise no. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex.
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
Is that homophobic? I think not.
If someone is caught lying about their sexuality, age, build, marital status or whatever they cannot be surprised that there are consequences."
The use of the word homophobic seems to have become an everyday thing with some people.
Sounds like myself and Mrs J have very similar tastes! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex.
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
Is that homophobic? I think not.
If someone is caught lying about their sexuality, age, build, marital status or whatever they cannot be surprised that there are consequences.
The use of the word homophobic seems to have become an everyday thing with some people.
Sounds like myself and Mrs J have very similar tastes! "
I have been accused recently in the same message by a bi guy of being simultaneously repressed, inhibited and homophobic as I was not interested in having sex with him!!
He apparently had difficulty dealing with rejection. Maybe he would have taken it better if I had just said he was too bloody ugly |
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The politics of sexuality,not straightforward(no pun intended) behaviour and identidy very very different...
But lets get real about 'honesty' . A lot of people bend the truth with age,sexuality,past experiences etc& lots of other things in order to get what they want.whether it be for a job or to get laid.. Lets just rock n roll and enjoy this wonderful site..Its not such a big deal for most of us.. |
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I prefer honesty in general but whilst we have bias and prejudice around, we won't get full honesty, Imo.
There are also confusing understandings of sexual orientation, where people may play but have no sexual attraction to the same gender.
We are getting better on fab, compared to just two or three years ago, with more guys now being more open and more acceptance of them in forum discussions. That's refreshing.
But we still live in an ignorant and prejudiced society and are not isolated from it.
When clubs allow guys to play on any night, rather than just on special bi nights, then we will have crossed a threshold. We need to be more inclusive to help things along.
Unless you live in a big city, I'm fairly sure you don't see guys being affectionate much in public. No holding hands etc, as it is frowned upon. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex.
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
Is that homophobic? I think not.
If someone is caught lying about their sexuality, age, build, marital status or whatever they cannot be surprised that there are consequences.
The use of the word homophobic seems to have become an everyday thing with some people.
Sounds like myself and Mrs J have very similar tastes!
I have been accused recently in the same message by a bi guy of being simultaneously repressed, inhibited and homophobic as I was not interested in having sex with him!!
He apparently had difficulty dealing with rejection. Maybe he would have taken it better if I had just said he was too bloody ugly "
I've come to realise there's no good way to tell a man you don't want to sleep with him. But the ones who say "Straight" then have veris from men they've had sex with, i tell them why. I normally get the reply "Oh it was just coz i was horny/d*unk/bored." which doesn't help their case any... |
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The politics of sexuality,not straightforward(no pun intended) behaviour and identidy very very different...
But lets get real about 'honesty' . A lot of people bend the truth with age,sexuality,past experiences etc& lots of other things in order to get what they want.whether it be for a job or to get laid.. Lets just rock n roll and enjoy this wonderful site..Its not such a big deal for most of us,or is it! Ax |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
"
your right!! I mean NEVER in history has there been a big tough, hairy chested manly rugby player type man who is gay or bi!!
Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
your right!! I mean NEVER in history has there been a big tough, hairy chested manly rugby player type man who is gay or bi!!
Lol "
" A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy."
That's the part of the post you're missing though. In my fantasy, he's straight. It's my fantasy, not yours. I like my men straight. I don't understand what's wrong with that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nope every bi guy obviously in secret wants to jump every man they meet dont play real sport just figure skating oh and they are all secretly polishing their nails.
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
your right!! I mean NEVER in history has there been a big tough, hairy chested manly rugby player type man who is gay or bi!!
Lol "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
your right!! I mean NEVER in history has there been a big tough, hairy chested manly rugby player type man who is gay or bi!!
Lol
" A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy."
That's the part of the post you're missing though. In my fantasy, he's straight. It's my fantasy, not yours. I like my men straight. I don't understand what's wrong with that."
if u are playing in a 1:1 situation I just don't get why it matters that he likes to suck cock?? A man can be bi without being camp! My hubby is bi-curious but only in a swinging situation he is not interested in ever having a relationship with another man. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex."
I think its called personal preference- You dont have to understand or condone it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
your right!! I mean NEVER in history has there been a big tough, hairy chested manly rugby player type man who is gay or bi!!
Lol
" A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy."
That's the part of the post you're missing though. In my fantasy, he's straight. It's my fantasy, not yours. I like my men straight. I don't understand what's wrong with that.
if u are playing in a 1:1 situation I just don't get why it matters that he likes to suck cock?? A man can be bi without being camp! My hubby is bi-curious but only in a swinging situation he is not interested in ever having a relationship with another man. "
NEVER in any of my posts have i used the word camp or even suggested it! As i said, i have slept with bi men and straight men and they are very different in bed in my opinion. I prefer straight guys. Please stop putting words in my mouth as the OP did. I am not homophobic and i never suggested bi men were camp. *Sigh. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
your right!! I mean NEVER in history has there been a big tough, hairy chested manly rugby player type man who is gay or bi!!
Lol
" A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy."
That's the part of the post you're missing though. In my fantasy, he's straight. It's my fantasy, not yours. I like my men straight. I don't understand what's wrong with that.
if u are playing in a 1:1 situation I just don't get why it matters that he likes to suck cock?? A man can be bi without being camp! My hubby is bi-curious but only in a swinging situation he is not interested in ever having a relationship with another man.
NEVER in any of my posts have i used the word camp or even suggested it! As i said, i have slept with bi men and straight men and they are very different in bed in my opinion. I prefer straight guys. Please stop putting words in my mouth as the OP did. I am not homophobic and i never suggested bi men were camp. *Sigh."
but how are they different?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
your right!! I mean NEVER in history has there been a big tough, hairy chested manly rugby player type man who is gay or bi!!
Lol
" A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy."
That's the part of the post you're missing though. In my fantasy, he's straight. It's my fantasy, not yours. I like my men straight. I don't understand what's wrong with that.
if u are playing in a 1:1 situation I just don't get why it matters that he likes to suck cock?? A man can be bi without being camp! My hubby is bi-curious but only in a swinging situation he is not interested in ever having a relationship with another man.
NEVER in any of my posts have i used the word camp or even suggested it! As i said, i have slept with bi men and straight men and they are very different in bed in my opinion. I prefer straight guys. Please stop putting words in my mouth as the OP did. I am not homophobic and i never suggested bi men were camp. *Sigh.
but how are they different?? "
I'll tell you my opinion in a private message but i don't feel like putting it in public as i have slept with bi and straight guys from this site. |
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As the OP says in her original post, it annoys her when people lie about their sexuality in order to get a meet. I think whatever everyone's personal preference we would all agree with that. What's the point in lying? We should actively seek what we want and what fulfils us.
I'm the female half and can honestly say that I have no interest in sleeping with bi men. I'm not homophobic, I have many friends, gay, bi and straight. I have dabbled with my bi side and have thoroughly enjoyed the experiences I've had. Although we practise safe sex I usually perform oral without a condom (hate the taste), therefore have no inclination to have a cock in my mouth which has been up a guys arse. Know this is also possible with a straight couple who practise anal however if we were ever in that situation I would either not go down there or use a condom. I also don't find 2 guys together a turn on but love watching women together. Have discussed this many times with my gay mates and concluded that for me, I find male gay sex animalistic whereas female gay sex is more of a visual stimulation for me. But then I don't like anal myself, have tried but my back door won't entertain it!. I don't mean any offence to anyone as firmly believe in this life it's each to their own. I just think we all know what we like so what benefit is it to lie on your profile? In effect you are excluding those who are genuinely interested in you
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
your right!! I mean NEVER in history has there been a big tough, hairy chested manly rugby player type man who is gay or bi!!
Lol
" A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy."
That's the part of the post you're missing though. In my fantasy, he's straight. It's my fantasy, not yours. I like my men straight. I don't understand what's wrong with that.
if u are playing in a 1:1 situation I just don't get why it matters that he likes to suck cock?? A man can be bi without being camp! My hubby is bi-curious but only in a swinging situation he is not interested in ever having a relationship with another man.
NEVER in any of my posts have i used the word camp or even suggested it! As i said, i have slept with bi men and straight men and they are very different in bed in my opinion. I prefer straight guys. Please stop putting words in my mouth as the OP did. I am not homophobic and i never suggested bi men were camp. *Sigh.
but how are they different??
I'll tell you my opinion in a private message but i don't feel like putting it in public as i have slept with bi and straight guys from this site."
I am interested in your reasons too.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
your right!! I mean NEVER in history has there been a big tough, hairy chested manly rugby player type man who is gay or bi!!
Lol
" A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy."
That's the part of the post you're missing though. In my fantasy, he's straight. It's my fantasy, not yours. I like my men straight. I don't understand what's wrong with that."
There's nothing wrong with it at all. You don't have to justify your reasons to anyone.
The only reason you need to give is "because you don't want to."
I'm interested and nosey as to why. |
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By *ynxMan
over a year ago
Stafford |
I really don't see the point in lying myself I rather have all cards on the table and be honest. I know alot of guys do it cause alot of women on here don't like bi people which I can understand as everyone has a type. From what I've seen those who don't understand it kinda think that a guy will sleep with anything and anyone now I can agree with that in some cases however not all so they might be scared encase they have something or what ever. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"As the OP says in her original post, it annoys her when people lie about their sexuality in order to get a meet. I think whatever everyone's personal preference we would all agree with that. What's the point in lying? We should actively seek what we want and what fulfils us.
I'm the female half and can honestly say that I have no interest in sleeping with bi men. I'm not homophobic, I have many friends, gay, bi and straight. I have dabbled with my bi side and have thoroughly enjoyed the experiences I've had. Although we practise safe sex I usually perform oral without a condom (hate the taste), therefore have no inclination to have a cock in my mouth which has been up a guys arse. Know this is also possible with a straight couple who practise anal however if we were ever in that situation I would either not go down there or use a condom. I also don't find 2 guys together a turn on but love watching women together. Have discussed this many times with my gay mates and concluded that for me, I find male gay sex animalistic whereas female gay sex is more of a visual stimulation for me. But then I don't like anal myself, have tried but my back door won't entertain it!. I don't mean any offence to anyone as firmly believe in this life it's each to their own. I just think we all know what we like so what benefit is it to lie on your profile? In effect you are excluding those who are genuinely interested in you
"
you do know that a guys cock is washable right?? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy."
So I have a partner who is big, tough, has muscles (does triathlon and spends several months a year skiing), has a gorgeous hairy chest and legs that are nicer than any rugby player...
He's bisexual.
Oh shit. Did I break the stereotype with him? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
wow! Well that explains all the meets you've had on here. "
I generally meet people from the swinging groups on fetish sites. I don't enjoy vanilla sex. But I do enjoy discussing sex and I find this site quite stimulating for it's discussion sometimes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
So I have a partner who is big, tough, has muscles (does triathlon and spends several months a year skiing), has a gorgeous hairy chest and legs that are nicer than any rugby player...
He's bisexual.
Oh shit. Did I break the stereotype with him?"
yes u did how dare you!! Anyway he must fuck differently cos bi guys do it different don't u know?? Lol |
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"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
So I have a partner who is big, tough, has muscles (does triathlon and spends several months a year skiing), has a
gorgeous hairy chest and legs that are
nicer than any rugby player...
He's bisexual.
Oh shit. Did I break the stereotype with
him?
yes u did how dare you!! Anyway he must fuck differently cos bi guys do it
different don't u know?? Lol"
I don't think I fuck differently to straight men! The only thing different I can think of is if it's with a couple, I might suck her husbands cock |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have straight on my profile but in the right circumstances have and will have sex with a woman. What else will I lie about and will men turn me down because of it? "
Ditto. I'm clearly not to be trusted. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
A slightly less trite answer though:
Are the options too limiting for some people? I categorise myself as straight. But I have met and played with women. I'm not bi-curious, because I've done it and know I like it. I'm not bisexual because I wouldn't meet a woman on their own without a man/men there too.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
So I have a partner who is big, tough, has muscles (does triathlon and spends several months a year skiing), has a
gorgeous hairy chest and legs that are
nicer than any rugby player...
He's bisexual.
Oh shit. Did I break the stereotype with
him?
yes u did how dare you!! Anyway he must fuck differently cos bi guys do it
different don't u know?? Lol
I don't think I fuck differently to straight men! The only thing different I can think of is if it's with a couple, I might suck her husbands cock "
Well when you've slept with a straight man, let me know if you still feel the same. |
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"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
So I have a partner who is big, tough, has muscles (does triathlon and spends several months a year skiing), has a
gorgeous hairy chest and legs that are
nicer than any rugby player...
He's bisexual
Oh shit. Did I break the stereotype with
him?
yes u did how dare you!! Anyway he
must fuck differently cos bi guys do it
different don't u know?? Lol
I don't think I fuck differently to straight men! The only thing different I can think
of is if it's with a couple, I might suck her husbands cock
Well when you've slept with a straight
man, let me know if you still feel the
same."
I don't think that's gonna happen!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
So I have a partner who is big, tough, has muscles (does triathlon and spends several months a year skiing), has a
gorgeous hairy chest and legs that are
nicer than any rugby player...
He's bisexual.
Oh shit. Did I break the stereotype with
him?
yes u did how dare you!! Anyway he must fuck differently cos bi guys do it
different don't u know?? Lol
I don't think I fuck differently to straight men! The only thing different I can think of is if it's with a couple, I might suck her husbands cock
Well when you've slept with a straight man, let me know if you still feel the same."
I've slept with plenty of straight guys and a few bi guys and there is absolutely no difference at all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
So I have a partner who is big, tough, has muscles (does triathlon and spends several months a year skiing), has a
gorgeous hairy chest and legs that are
nicer than any rugby player...
He's bisexual.
Oh shit. Did I break the stereotype with
him?
yes u did how dare you!! Anyway he must fuck differently cos bi guys do it
different don't u know?? Lol
I don't think I fuck differently to straight men! The only thing different I can think of is if it's with a couple, I might suck her husbands cock
Well when you've slept with a straight man, let me know if you still feel the same.
I've slept with plenty of straight guys and a few bi guys and there is absolutely no difference at all"
Sorry but after the last comment i assumed i was talking to the male of the couple. Is this the lady? |
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"As the OP says in her original post, it annoys her when people lie about their sexuality in order to get a meet. I think whatever everyone's personal preference we would all agree with that. What's the point in lying? We should actively seek what we want and what fulfils us.
I'm the female half and can honestly say that I have no interest in sleeping with bi men. I'm not homophobic, I have many friends, gay, bi and straight. I have dabbled with my bi side and have thoroughly enjoyed the experiences I've had. Although we practise safe sex I usually perform oral without a condom (hate the taste), therefore have no inclination to have a cock in my mouth which has been up a guys arse. Know this is also possible with a straight couple who practise anal however if we were ever in that situation I would either not go down there or use a condom. I also don't find 2 guys together a turn on but love watching women together. Have discussed this many times with my gay mates and concluded that for me, I find male gay sex animalistic whereas female gay sex is more of a visual stimulation for me. But then I don't like anal myself, have tried but my back door won't entertain it!. I don't mean any offence to anyone as firmly believe in this life it's each to their own. I just think we all know what we like so what benefit is it to lie on your profile? In effect you are excluding those who are genuinely interested in you
you do know that a guys cock is washable right?? "
Yes I'm quite aware but as I said, each to their own. I know I wouldn't want it in my mouth after seeing him hammering away in some guys arse washed or not! What a boring world it would be if we were all the same eh? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A slightly less trite answer though:
Are the options too limiting for some people? I categorise myself as straight. But I have met and played with women. I'm not bi-curious, because I've done it and know I like it. I'm not bisexual because I wouldn't meet a woman on their own without a man/men there too.
"
We discussed this very thing. I will happily play with a guy within a meet situation with my wife but would not meet one in a one to one situation and will not do anal. The options we are given are straight, bi curious or bisexual.. so I chose bi curious.. im not curious I know exactly what I will wont do ect.. not bisexual as would not meet 1:1 and anal is not on the table but would happily play in a male female group situation. So as I chose bi curious and then explained in profile more bi playful was more apt.. but if I had put straight I would be accused of lying and hiding my sexuality! Blurred lines I think but people want everything to be black and white |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A slightly less trite answer though:
Are the options too limiting for some people? I categorise myself as straight. But I have met and played with women. I'm not bi-curious, because I've done it and know I like it. I'm not bisexual because I wouldn't meet a woman on their own without a man/men there too.
We discussed this very thing. I will happily play with a guy within a meet situation with my wife but would not meet one in a one to one situation and will not do anal. The options we are given are straight, bi curious or bisexual.. so I chose bi curious.. im not curious I know exactly what I will wont do ect.. not bisexual as would not meet 1:1 and anal is not on the table but would happily play in a male female group situation. So as I chose bi curious and then explained in profile more bi playful was more apt.. but if I had put straight I would be accused of lying and hiding my sexuality! Blurred lines I think but people want everything to be black and white"
Totally agree. Yes some are outright lying because they think it puts certain women off, others just don't fit neatly into the 3 options we're given to choose from. |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"I prefer them to be honest if they are straight or bi.
if they hide there sexuality, what else they hiding!"
So true. They could also then be lying about the colour of the car they drive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"As the OP says in her original post, it annoys her when people lie about their sexuality in order to get a meet. I think whatever everyone's personal preference we would all agree with that. What's the point in lying? We should actively seek what we want and what fulfils us.
I'm the female half and can honestly say that I have no interest in sleeping with bi men. I'm not homophobic, I have many friends, gay, bi and straight. I have dabbled with my bi side and have thoroughly enjoyed the experiences I've had. Although we practise safe sex I usually perform oral without a condom (hate the taste), therefore have no inclination to have a cock in my mouth which has been up a guys arse. Know this is also possible with a straight couple who practise anal however if we were ever in that situation I would either not go down there or use a condom. I also don't find 2 guys together a turn on but love watching women together. Have discussed this many times with my gay mates and concluded that for me, I find male gay sex animalistic whereas female gay sex is more of a visual stimulation for me. But then I don't like anal myself, have tried but my back door won't entertain it!. I don't mean any offence to anyone as firmly believe in this life it's each to their own. I just think we all know what we like so what benefit is it to lie on your profile? In effect you are excluding those who are genuinely interested in you
you do know that a guys cock is washable right??
Yes I'm quite aware but as I said, each to their own. I know I wouldn't want it in my mouth after seeing him hammering away in some guys arse washed or not! What a boring world it would be if we were all the same eh?"
And most of us don't top so our cocks ha e only been inside mouths and fannies. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
your right!! I mean NEVER in history has there been a big tough, hairy chested manly rugby player type man who is gay or bi!!
Lol
" A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy."
That's the part of the post you're missing though. In my fantasy, he's straight. It's my fantasy, not yours. I like my men straight. I don't understand what's wrong with that.
if u are playing in a 1:1 situation I just don't get why it matters that he likes to suck cock?? A man can be bi without being camp! My hubby is bi-curious but only in a swinging situation he is not interested in ever having a relationship with another man.
NEVER in any of my posts have i used the word camp or even suggested it! As i said, i have slept with bi men and straight men and they are very different in bed in my opinion. I prefer straight guys. Please stop putting words in my mouth as the OP did. I am not homophobic and i never suggested bi men were camp. *Sigh."
There are different in your mind.
I know someone who was married and have two kids but is now tv. I don't think you would have known if he had not started dressing as a woman and going out with men
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
There's a few things on here which are utter crap....
How anyone can tell the difference between a bi or straight guy from having sex I dont know and would love to find out.
The idea of a masculine rugby player not fitting a fantasy because he was bi? If you didnt know he was bet it wouldnt matter then.
However to get back to OP's question I dont like it when we're messaged by straight guys who say they are bi. The majority have said because most profiles say wont meet bi guys and I dont want to spoil my chances. To me (cin) I find it wrong that they would lie to a couple or woman and go against their preferences by saying they're straight when their not. We dont care if your bi, straight, gay, tv or ts, married or single all we ask is some respect and honesty because though this is a sex site it's not an excuse not to be truthful. That way we can make the choice of meeting those people who match our preferences just as much as as those looking for straight only can meet theirs. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Its fucking simple,guys are scared to admit their bisexual,as society is still fucked up by religion and Victorian values,fuck it this is the 21st century move on from that shit."
Kinda agree with this. Ive had a few friends no longer talk to me when ive admitted being bisexual. Im married and its all lovely jubbly. But society has its hang ups. And we sometimes dont wanna lose anymore... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Its fucking simple,guys are scared to admit their bisexual,as society is still fucked up by religion and Victorian values,fuck it this is the 21st century move on from that shit.
Kinda agree with this. Ive had a few friends no longer talk to me when ive admitted being bisexual. Im married and its all lovely jubbly. But society has its hang ups. And we sometimes dont wanna lose anymore... "
people are sheep and hate to stand out of the flock,,but its changing.
its my mission to help these poor straight guys  |
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In answer to the OPs question which was "So I guess my question is this - does anyone else find this kind of lying as much of a turn off as I do?"....
Yes because they lack confidence and that's a real turn off for me. I get a fair men contacting me who ask for sex and their profile says straight. That makes me laugh when people on here say they only meet straight men....wanna bet?
I would also like to know how bi men fuck differently to straight men.
Presumably with more élan. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"In answer to the OPs question which was "So I guess my question is this - does anyone else find this kind of lying as much of a turn off as I do?"....
Yes because they lack confidence and that's a real turn off for me. I get a fair men contacting me who ask for sex and their profile says straight. That makes me laugh when people on here say they only meet straight men....wanna bet?
I would also like to know how bi men fuck differently to straight men.
Presumably with more élan. "
My guess is that we take more time on satisfying the women we share our company with instead of concentrating on our own needs.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
So I have a partner who is big, tough, has muscles (does triathlon and spends several months a year skiing), has a gorgeous hairy chest and legs that are nicer than any rugby player...
He's bisexual.
Oh shit. Did I break the stereotype with him?"
I have absolutely no doubt there are many wonderfully big, butch rugby playing gay/bi guys out there.
I am also sure the fuck in every way as competently as any other bloke.
Nor do I have any concerns that for some bizarre reason they are likely to have poorer sexual hygiene than the average swinger.
It all comes down to the realm of fantasy. It doesn't matter how big & butch the guy is, if I am aware that he is bi then for me that is a big let down.
Sorry if that upsets some people but that is a matter of personal preference.
As such we are not likely to be impressed if we find out a guy is lying about this on his profile.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"...
I would also like to know how bi men fuck differently to straight men.
...
Their c**ks are 'bent'. Which, thb, gives better sensation for the woman  "
Wow the bi guys have really jumped on my observation! I can promise you bi-guys are very different from straight guys in bed. But if you don't believe me that's fine. Maybe some women are more receptive to the signs. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So I guess my question is this - does anyone else find this kind of lying as much of a turn off as I do?"
Yes, a big turn off!
Except I get the flip side of the coin: men saying they are 'actually' bi and only put straight on their profile to sleep with women. |
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No verifs after a year on the site and self confessed Sexuality Student - at last another Fab myth busted yes Sydney University does actually exist...
What's it with women who only want to meet bi men anyway ????? |
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By *essysteveCouple
over a year ago
ALICANTE AREA SPAIN |
We are both bi and get loads of messages from single straight guys who then profess to be bi .... using all of the excuses that have been mentioned here.
These go straight into our 'blocked' file (huge amount).
There are numerous fantastic bi guys, bi girls and couples so why take a chance on a single straight guy who may or may not be bi |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"No verifs after a year on the site and self confessed Sexuality Student - at last another Fab myth busted yes Sydney University does actually exist...
What's it with women who only want to meet bi men anyway ????? "
No veris - I meet swingers on fetish websites rather than here. Or at swing/kink crossover clubs. There's nothing in the TOU here that says you have to have sex with people on this site. As it happens I *have*, except they were not a verified member either.
And yes, I'm studying gender and sexuality as part of my undergraduate degree. I'm not entirely sure why you appear to be mocking that.
And I want to meet bi men... because I hope that any men I meet will be willing to have threesomes in the future. I find - in my experience - that straight men don't want to have anal sex with other men. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We are both bi and get loads of messages from single straight guys who then profess to be bi .... using all of the excuses that have been mentioned here.
These go straight into our 'blocked' file (huge amount).
There are numerous fantastic bi guys, bi girls and couples so why take a chance on a single straight guy who may or may not be bi "
Er...because i have preferences, as o you. I don't like sleeping with bi guys. I like sleeping with straight guys. And as i've said before i can tell the difference. I don't get why people are happy to say "It's the persons choice" when race or height or body type is involved but not when sexuality is involved. How does that make sense? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No verifs after a year on the site and self confessed Sexuality Student - at last another Fab myth busted yes Sydney University does actually exist...
What's it with women who only want to meet bi men anyway ????? "
What's wrong with only wanting to meet bi guys, I prefer them |
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"No verifs after a year on the site and self confessed Sexuality Student - at last another Fab myth busted yes Sydney University does actually exist...
What's it with women who only want to meet bi men anyway ????? "
More interesting |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"...
I would also like to know how bi men fuck differently to straight men.
...
Their c**ks are 'bent'. Which, thb, gives better sensation for the woman
Wow the bi guys have really jumped on my observation! I can promise you bi-guys are very different from straight guys in bed. But if you don't believe me that's fine. Maybe some women are more receptive to the signs."
Maybe some women are; but how could you possibly know? |
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Thanks for replying OP.
My post was tongue in cheek you certainly come across as a genuine sexuality researcher but like most of the fab members I'm here for sex meets and I wanted to point out that you either aren't or don't understand that without the verifs system the site would collapse under its own weight of fakers... I've lost count of new members asking for bareback or bi MMF meets and nearly all turn out to be fakers ( just to confirm they leave the site or a year later have no verifs)
Anyway nice to finally hear from Sydney University
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
People lie because the internet and Fab are basically open forums. Every man and his dog can view what is written. This includes family and friends who you might not want to know certain things.
Is this wrong? No, not really! why should everyone, including people who you don't really know, know everything about you?
Everybody lies about something, and all have their own reasons for doing so. If you want true privacy about something then you just don't tell anyone. Or, you only tell those people that need to know.
Nothing wrong with that.
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Thanks for replying OP.
My post was tongue in cheek you certainly come across as a genuine sexuality researcher but like most of the fab members I'm here for sex meets and I wanted to point out that you either aren't or don't understand that without the verifs system the site would collapse under its own weight of fakers... I've lost count of new members asking for bareback or bi MMF meets and nearly all turn out to be fakers ( just to confirm they leave the site or a year later have no verifs)
Anyway nice to finally hear from Sydney University
"
I've used plenty of hook up sites over the years that have no verification systems and had plenty of sex from them...
Even if I had verifications I would personally not display them on my profile as I don't want everyone to know who I've had sex with and what I did with them... |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Rushden |
"I like sleeping with straight guys. And as i've said before i can tell the difference. I don't get why people are happy to say "It's the persons choice" when race or height or body type is involved but not when sexuality is involved. How does that make sense?"
It is not your preference that has caused the questioning, it is the IMHO silly assertion that you can actually tell a Bi guy by having sex with him! Up till that point I was with what you were saying and respected your preference! (still respect that) Problem is, you admit to having slept with Bi guys but won't say how you find it different!
I suspect that you have got caught up in a little fib after trying to make excuses for your preference. You didn't need to and you didn't need to explain your preference! But to come out with something like (I can tell by sleeping with Bi guys) is just a little too much like a fairy story for me! Sorry... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like sleeping with straight guys. And as i've said before i can tell the difference. I don't get why people are happy to say "It's the persons choice" when race or height or body type is involved but not when sexuality is involved. How does that make sense?
It is not your preference that has caused the questioning, it is the IMHO silly assertion that you can actually tell a Bi guy by having sex with him! Up till that point I was with what you were saying and respected your preference! (still respect that) Problem is, you admit to having slept with Bi guys but won't say how you find it different!
I suspect that you have got caught up in a little fib after trying to make excuses for your preference. You didn't need to and you didn't need to explain your preference! But to come out with something like (I can tell by sleeping with Bi guys) is just a little too much like a fairy story for me! Sorry..."
You're entitled to your opinion. And i know i'm right about my intuition. I'm sorry it makes so aggressive. Hope you have a great Friday night |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Rushden |
"
You're entitled to your opinion. And i know i'm right about my intuition. I'm sorry it makes so aggressive. Hope you have a great Friday night "
That last post speaks volumes about your "Intuition"! Where was I in the slightest "Aggressive"? I was very careful to point out that I respect your preference but I don't believe in fairy stories! |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"I like sleeping with straight guys. And as i've said before i can tell the difference. I don't get why people are happy to say "It's the persons choice" when race or height or body type is involved but not when sexuality is involved. How does that make sense?
It is not your preference that has caused the questioning, it is the IMHO silly assertion that you can actually tell a Bi guy by having sex with him! Up till that point I was with what you were saying and respected your preference! (still respect that) Problem is, you admit to having slept with Bi guys but won't say how you find it different!
I suspect that you have got caught up in a little fib after trying to make excuses for your preference. You didn't need to and you didn't need to explain your preference! But to come out with something like (I can tell by sleeping with Bi guys) is just a little too much like a fairy story for me! Sorry..."
Its all to do with having a nose for it |
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We have plenty of threesomes with other men, I have no intrest in touching them. I simply get really excited seeing my wife enjoy the attention we both give her and doing stuff that just two of us can't (she does love a good roast)
As to sexuality I choose pan, as my belief if I have never met a man I was attracted too.
This was in answer to "why would a straight guy ever want a threesome, if not interested in playing with the male"
Sometimes sex is more about another's pleasure, than simply your own. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like sleeping with straight guys. And as i've said before i can tell the difference. I don't get why people are happy to say "It's the persons choice" when race or height or body type is involved but not when sexuality is involved. How does that make sense?
It is not your preference that has caused the questioning, it is the IMHO silly assertion that you can actually tell a Bi guy by having sex with him! Up till that point I was with what you were saying and respected your preference! (still respect that) Problem is, you admit to having slept with Bi guys but won't say how you find it different!
I suspect that you have got caught up in a little fib after trying to make excuses for your preference. You didn't need to and you didn't need to explain your preference! But to come out with something like (I can tell by sleeping with Bi guys) is just a little too much like a fairy story for me! Sorry...
Its all to do with having a nose for it "
Wow. Way to be mature. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have the opposite problem. I only like guys who are straight.
Why?
I mean, I look for bisexual guys because I like threesomes, but I can't think of a single reason (homophobia aside) that someone would only want to meet a straight man for sex.
Mrs J fantasises about a certain type of guy - big, tough, muscles, hairy chest & is the manly rugby playing type. A guy who is bi is not compatible with that fantasy.
Is that homophobic? I think not.
If someone is caught lying about their sexuality, age, build, marital status or whatever they cannot be surprised that there are consequences.
I know lots of bi and gay guys that fit your description of what she wants. "
Do you, cos if no one else wants em send em my way...purely for research purposes you understand as I too am a bit confused about what a bi guy does differently in the sack with a woman than a straight guy |
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"I like sleeping with straight guys. And as i've said before i can tell the difference. I don't get why people are happy to say "It's the persons choice" when race or height or body type is involved but not when sexuality is involved. How does that make sense?
It is not your preference that has caused the questioning, it is the IMHO silly assertion that you can actually tell a Bi guy by having sex with him! Up till that point I was with what you were saying and respected your preference! (still respect that) Problem is, you admit to having slept with Bi guys but won't say how you find it different!
I suspect that you have got caught up in a little fib after trying to make excuses for your preference. You didn't need to and you didn't need to explain your preference! But to come out with something like (I can tell by sleeping with Bi guys) is just a little too much like a fairy story for me! Sorry..."
Great post! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"guys on here are attracted to tg's and don't see that as being gay,personally I could,nt care what they call em selves.
if some one finds me attractive and I find them attractive ,who cares.
funny how people cant get their head round that.
"
I personally think tg and tv should be seperate categories and not labelled the same |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for replying OP.
My post was tongue in cheek you certainly come across as a genuine sexuality researcher but like most of the fab members I'm here for sex meets and I wanted to point out that you either aren't or don't understand that without the verifs system the site would collapse under its own weight of fakers... I've lost count of new members asking for bareback or bi MMF meets and nearly all turn out to be fakers ( just to confirm they leave the site or a year later have no verifs)
Anyway nice to finally hear from Sydney University
I've used plenty of hook up sites over the years that have no verification systems and had plenty of sex from them...
Even if I had verifications I would personally not display them on my profile as I don't want everyone to know who I've had sex with and what I did with them..."
lots of folk keep it private |
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