FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > A waste of time
A waste of time
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Not a time waster but people who make contact and you just don't know what to say.
For Instance:
The e-mail that says "hi how are you today"
Do you answer saying "your fine" and wait for the next one liner until eventually the get to the point or do you ignore it.
The wink from someone who sounds reasonable but just has a picture of a cock or an open pussy shot or like the one we got minutes ago a pair of tits.
What do we do, wink back, that means we are interested but having only seen a pair of tits I really don't know if we are interested or not?
Do we ignore it and risk alienating we might have actually liked to meet ?
What contact do you consider to be a waste of time, the wrong approach ? |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
I agree, its so boring when you get an email saying how are you today? Nothing is commented about your profile or is a bog standard copy and past email with no general effort put in.
Get so many of those so just delelte them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I reckon you should view their profile if they look interesting then strike up a message conversation, if not then reply " Hi im good thank you,sorry but your not quite what we're looking for"
What have you got to lose,and you might even make a friend x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Occasionally we do respond, it goes like this, each line being one email:
"Hi, how r u"
"fine"
"grt."
or
"Wnt 2 chat?"
"ok, sure"
"wht do u lik?"
"Have you even read our profile?"
"lol"
always seems to be people with Vowel Aversion, we notice. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Seems to be the old dilemma about winks - can't say I've had any joy with them. Am giving up with them as a result.
But then you take the time to write a nice personalised message after reading the profile and it just gets deleted. I understand that some people get inundated with messages so that should come as no surprise.
It's the way things are on this site and I accept that. Maybe the opening messages I write are not eye-catching enough? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If its a one liner email but the profile is good then i will answer. If the profile is also a one liner then I just ignore it. People have different reasons for not wanting pics on profile. I dont but have face pic that I will attach to an email if needs be. Reason for this is I was approached in my childs school playground by someone who had seen my face pic on a previous site I was on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've no objection to the one liners like "hi, how are you" or "Hi, hows your day been?", i cant then get into conversation with them. The ones i object to are the "wanna suck this" or "wanna watch me wank on cam", think in that case, id rather watch paint dry 
I dont mind the winkers either, i look at their profile, if its crap, i ignore it, if not i wink back 
So to your last paragraph, definitely the one liner messages of wanna suck or sit on this variety  people that havent read my profile like the little boys and married idiots, equally i dont like a long message that suggests they've copied and pasted their profile, i can read  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I decided to reply with honesty and said that we might be interested but couldn't say having only seen a pair of boobs, I got a reply to say "ok let's chat sometime" ..........  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I get an email just saying "hi how are you today?" and I like the profile then I'll respond to their question without expanding and await another email.
I ignore most winks unless the senders profile is exceptional in which case I'll wink back and wait for them to get more imaginitive.
The most frustrating contact is something that comes when you've removed all your pics (apart from avatar) and verifications etc and your profile simply states that you're not looking for any new contacts. |
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By *adgeeMan
over a year ago
Dumbarton |
"Occasionally we do respond, it goes like this, each line being one email:
"Wnt 2 chat?"
"ok, sure"
"wht do u lik?"
"Have you even read our profile?"
"lol"
always seems to be people with Vowel Aversion, we notice."
Is it coincidence that so many people with a vowel aversion get in contact though?
The majority of mail i receive is a one liner OR from someone averse to vowels. We all get one chance to make a good first impression, why jeopardise your efforts by being lazy and leaving out the vowels?
It is very off-putting but wouldn't be a deciding factor whether to meet or not, but it does tell you a lot about the sender.
Maybe it's just some of us that have an O.C.D with regards to grammar. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oooooh don't get me started Jed!
Delete without reading every "hi, how are you" messages.
Ditto all messages starting "hi sexy/honey/babe".
Total waste of time messages from couples asking to meet.
Waste of time messages from men who "fancy a black bird", plenty of them at the Tower of London, knock yourself out.
The list is endless! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also there are the statement messages like, i like curvy/large/full figured women or i like redheads"
I respond to them, I always say, "good for you, hope you find one that likes hearing that"
other ones are "wanna chat?", "you free?" (oh the temptation though) and whatcha doing today/this weekend).
then there's those that throw in statements of fact like
"25yr old male here" or "it's my birthday".....I'm not sure if I'm suposed to congratulate on those facts? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also there are the statement messages like, i like curvy/large/full figured women or i like redheads
I respond to them, I always say, "good for you, hope you find one that likes hearing that"
other ones are "wanna chat?", "you free?" (oh the temptation though) and whatcha doing today/this weekend).
then there's those that throw in statements of fact like
"25yr old male here" or "it's my birthday".....I'm not sure if I'm suposed to congratulate on those facts?"
Bugger - that's all my strategies gone!
If a 'statement' message relates to your profile, e.g. I really like curvy woman, is it that bad?
What kind of message DO you respond positively to? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bugger - that's all my strategies gone!
If a 'statement' message relates to your profile, e.g. I really like curvy woman, is it that bad?
What kind of message DO you respond positively to?"
I respond to well thought through messages, ones that show that the guy has looked at my profile and decided that we may be compatible.
Just because he likes his woman big, doesnt mean we're going to hit it off.
I guess when you get a message, you want it in the way you would yourself send one out...not asking for the guy to have esp, but it's the same as an introduction in a club and first impressions do count. If I see they've tried, I'm going to be more likely to respond. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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when we do send mail we tend to make sure there is something in the message that could be replied to,it is difficult trying to reply to something where there really is nothing to say lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Occasionally we do respond, it goes like this, each line being one email:
"Wnt 2 chat?"
"ok, sure"
"wht do u lik?"
"Have you even read our profile?"
"lol"
always seems to be people with Vowel Aversion, we notice.
Is it coincidence that so many people with a vowel aversion get in contact though?
The majority of mail i receive is a one liner OR from someone averse to vowels. We all get one chance to make a good first impression, why jeopardise your efforts by being lazy and leaving out the vowels?
It is very off-putting but wouldn't be a deciding factor whether to meet or not, but it does tell you a lot about the sender.
Maybe it's just some of us that have an O.C.D with regards to grammar. "
yeah _adgee,, i mean you never did reply to my,,,,fancy a f,,k 1 liner???? lol 
auds xx  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Bugger - that's all my strategies gone!
If a 'statement' message relates to your profile, e.g. I really like curvy woman, is it that bad?
What kind of message DO you respond positively to?
I respond to well thought through messages, ones that show that the guy has looked at my profile and decided that we may be compatible.
Just because he likes his woman big, doesnt mean we're going to hit it off.
I guess when you get a message, you want it in the way you would yourself send one out...not asking for the guy to have esp, but it's the same as an introduction in a club and first impressions do count. If I see they've tried, I'm going to be more likely to respond."
Agree wholeheartedly! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
I don't mind the "how are you?" type thing... because if you want to get to know someone then obviously we all have to start a conversation somehow.........
but it is drawing a conversation out of someone is what I am trying to do, I am trying to get a feel for a person who potentially you may end up playing with....
so for me the most frustrating thing is the one or two word answers, because they don't actually tell me anything, about that person, they don't make an effort... and if that is what they are like in conversation then it makes me wonder if that is what they are like playing....... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don't mind the "how are you?" type thing... because if you want to get to know someone then obviously we all have to start a conversation somehow.........
but it is drawing a conversation out of someone is what I am trying to do, I am trying to get a feel for a person who potentially you may end up playing with....
so for me the most frustrating thing is the one or two word answers, because they don't actually tell me anything, about that person, they don't make an effort... and if that is what they are like in conversation then it makes me wonder if that is what they are like playing......."
Understand what your saying but personally I would give them something to go on, ie a longer introduction message and see how well they respond, "how are you" sent to us gets the "fine thanks" answer, a longer intro message starting "how are you" gets an equally long reply (or is that what you were trying to say ?)
My favourite has to be the one liner ...
"I see we live quite close to each other"
My reply is always
"Thanks for the warning"  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not a time waster but people who make contact and you just don't know what to say.
For Instance:
The e-mail that says "hi how are you today"
Do you answer saying "your fine" and wait for the next one liner until eventually the get to the point or do you ignore it.
The wink from someone who sounds reasonable but just has a picture of a cock or an open pussy shot or like the one we got minutes ago a pair of tits.
What do we do, wink back, that means we are interested but having only seen a pair of tits I really don't know if we are interested or not?
Do we ignore it and risk alienating we might have actually liked to meet ?
What contact do you consider to be a waste of time, the wrong approach ?"
When I get the "how are you today messages" I just reply I'm fine thanks how are, if they have no picture I ask for one and take it from there, if the one liners continue still I'll ask them what their looking for and if I lose interest I send them a no thanks but good luck message and end it |
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By *ollie_JCouple
over a year ago
London |
"
The wink from someone who sounds reasonable but just has a picture of a cock or an open pussy shot or like the one we got minutes ago a pair of tits.
"
Wasn't us!
We do sometimes wink just to gauge a reaction then feel bad about it as we state in our profile our stance on winks.. goose for the gander..
So we would normally follow up a few mins later with an extended wink - ie quick couple of sentences and some pics, or we might put down an essay and a few pics
Most of the time we get ignored or a few sentences back.. and we are then unsure - do they want us to go away - or continue - but as we have sort of essayed out to them we have nothing else to say
We know people are not time wasters as they may have the same verifications as us - but like you we are thinking well what do we do? are they being nice.. should we block them or follow up? |
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
I reply with fewer word than they have used in their message.
I work in Manchester - Good for you
You look nice - Thank you
Nice tits - Thanks
Wanna fuck - No
Hi - .....
We soon run out of conversation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I've never sent a wanna fuck message and never will.
But I have made some of these fundamental errors you guys are listing. Especially the 'I live/work near you' line.
Feel a bit of a tit now. No wonder I never get any replies.
|
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
"I've never sent a wanna fuck message and never will.
But I have made some of these fundamental errors you guys are listing. Especially the 'I live/work near you' line.
Feel a bit of a tit now. No wonder I never get any replies.
"
Read and learn, read and learn.
Then just ignore us |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
The wink from someone who sounds reasonable but just has a picture of a cock or an open pussy shot or like the one we got minutes ago a pair of tits.
Wasn't us!
We do sometimes wink just to gauge a reaction then feel bad about it as we state in our profile our stance on winks.. goose for the gander..
So we would normally follow up a few mins later with an extended wink - ie quick couple of sentences and some pics, or we might put down an essay and a few pics
Most of the time we get ignored or a few sentences back.. and we are then unsure - do they want us to go away - or continue - but as we have sort of essayed out to them we have nothing else to say
We know people are not time wasters as they may have the same verifications as us - but like you we are thinking well what do we do? are they being nice.. should we block them or follow up?"
We love the wink system but it doesn't work when someone winks us and they don't have information in thier profile or no pics or just body part pics, we are not going to wink back and say we are interested because we honestly don't know if we are, we hate ignoring it because we might be sending the wrong message to someone we might like (or not sending a message if you see what I mean lol) |
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
"Just had a message from someone we haven't ever had any contact with asking if we're having a party tonight? Struck me as being a bit cheeky really but that might just be me! Z"
So are you?? |
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"Just had a message from someone we haven't ever had any contact with asking if we're having a party tonight? Struck me as being a bit cheeky really but that might just be me! Z
So are you?? "
lol - no - that was last week! Z |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't ever send one liners and what gets me are those people who don't even respond to whatever you send them (and I don't mean rude messages). There are a lot of people on here and I don't really know what they're looking for. |
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
"Just had a message from someone we haven't ever had any contact with asking if we're having a party tonight? Struck me as being a bit cheeky really but that might just be me! Z
So are you??
lol - no - that was last week! Z"
bugger 
*goes to put party dress away |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I certainly won't ignore you - this advice is gold dust.
Hope to be able to differentiate myself on being able to read, learn and act upon the wise counsel of others! |
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"I don't ever send one liners and what gets me are those people who don't even respond to whatever you send them (and I don't mean rude messages). There are a lot of people on here and I don't really know what they're looking for."
I know a few profiles - usualy single ladies who state on their profile that they will only respond if they're interested in the sender - sending thanks but no thanks messages takes ages and can lead to 'why not' or being abused - i know women who get a couple of messages a minute when they're logged on to the site! |
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"Just had a message from someone we haven't ever had any contact with asking if we're having a party tonight? Struck me as being a bit cheeky really but that might just be me! Z
So are you??
lol - no - that was last week! Z
Party dress not required! Z
bugger
*goes to put party dress away"
|
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Seriously though, I think that really short, badly written messages tend not to do so much for us! Had one a couple of years ago that went something like 'our kids are having a party, you will be honoured to be allowed to accomodate us over night'!!!We'd never even chatted with them! Needless to say it as a 'bugger off' reply! Z |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't ever send one liners and what gets me are those people who don't even respond to whatever you send them (and I don't mean rude messages). There are a lot of people on here and I don't really know what they're looking for.
I know a few profiles - usualy single ladies who state on their profile that they will only respond if they're interested in the sender - sending thanks but no thanks messages takes ages and can lead to 'why not' or being abused - i know women who get a couple of messages a minute when they're logged on to the site! "
What I find, some men don't really take into consideration what you want just their own needs which is evident in the post they send.
If I say - and I mean it 100% - I'm only interested in x, y and z, why does a, b and c contact me because they "like (whatever) women"?!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't ever send one liners and what gets me are those people who don't even respond to whatever you send them (and I don't mean rude messages). There are a lot of people on here and I don't really know what they're looking for.
I know a few profiles - usualy single ladies who state on their profile that they will only respond if they're interested in the sender - sending thanks but no thanks messages takes ages and can lead to 'why not' or being abused - i know women who get a couple of messages a minute when they're logged on to the site!
What I find, some men don't really take into consideration what you want just their own needs which is evident in the post they send.
If I say - and I mean it 100% - I'm only interested in x, y and z, why does a, b and c contact me because they "like (whatever) women"?!! "
Ok. Thanks. I'll remember that. |
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By *adgeeMan
over a year ago
Dumbarton |
"Occasionally we do respond, it goes like this, each line being one email:
"Wnt 2 chat?"
"ok, sure"
"wht do u lik?"
"Have you even read our profile?"
"lol"
always seems to be people with Vowel Aversion, we notice.
Is it coincidence that so many people with a vowel aversion get in contact though?
The majority of mail i receive is a one liner OR from someone averse to vowels. We all get one chance to make a good first impression, why jeopardise your efforts by being lazy and leaving out the vowels?
It is very off-putting but wouldn't be a deciding factor whether to meet or not, but it does tell you a lot about the sender.
Maybe it's just some of us that have an O.C.D with regards to grammar. yeah _adgee,, i mean you never did reply to my,,,,fancy a f,,k 1 liner???? lol
auds xx "
Haha No, i never did receive that mail, you must have distracted the postie Auds. It was always gonna be a no-brainer |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Not a time waster but people who make contact and you just don't know what to say.
For Instance:
The e-mail that says "hi how are you today"
Do you answer saying "your fine" and wait for the next one liner until eventually the get to the point or do you ignore it.
The wink from someone who sounds reasonable but just has a picture of a cock or an open pussy shot or like the one we got minutes ago a pair of tits.
What do we do, wink back, that means we are interested but having only seen a pair of tits I really don't know if we are interested or not?
Do we ignore it and risk alienating we might have actually liked to meet ?
What contact do you consider to be a waste of time, the wrong approach ?"
i think it very much depends on mood......for instance my single profile states im not meeting as a single femme anymore, now if i get messages from people and im in a mischevious mood i will toy with them a bit, other times il just ignore n delete |
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