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Rant on Sunday!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Sorry fellow fabber's I know its not Rant Thursday but this is a minor interim rant lol.

This is regarding pics on our profile or lack of them, just bringing this up as someone made a underhanded remark about us not having them and there does appear from some to be a certain snobbery about people who do have pics that feel they are somehow more genuine than those that don't.

We don't like showing pics as we do not feel the need to let the whole world see our faces or bodies, we will send pics to those who request after we have chatted and begin meeting process otherwise we don't.

We get all the meets we want and more requests than we can deal with so it doesn't affect us.

So why do you feel people take this attitude?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Some people want to see pics. Some people want to hide them.

Some people are rude about other people's preferences. Some people are polite and accept that everyone is different.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Some people want to see pics. Some people want to hide them.

Some people are rude about other people's preferences. Some people are polite and accept that everyone is different. "

Well said x

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Some people want to see pics. Some people want to hide them.

Some people are rude about other people's preferences. Some people are polite and accept that everyone is different.

Well said x"

It's your choice as to how you run your profile so why worry about how others perceive it?

We won't make first contact with or respond to profiles with no pics - our choice entirely.

We also laugh at the sheer volume of messages we get asking to meet today/tomorrow/soon. We're very clear as to our inability to do so in our profile. Does it stop requests? No. Does it result in us being called timewasters and being told we're on the wrong site? Yes. Does it bother us in the slightest? Not a bit.

If somebody's choice of how to run their profile or use the site doesn't meet your own - it's simple - move on.

Telling them they're wrong is pointless. And worrying about it even more so.

A

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Some people want to see pics. Some people want to hide them.

Some people are rude about other people's preferences. Some people are polite and accept that everyone is different.

Well said x"

The underhanded remark you're referring to was in response to a tactless comment you made.

You're entitled to your opinion, as are they.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Some people want to see pics. Some people want to hide them.

Some people are rude about other people's preferences. Some people are polite and accept that everyone is different.

Well said x

It's your choice as to how you run your profile so why worry about how others perceive it?

We won't make first contact with or respond to profiles with no pics - our choice entirely.

We also laugh at the sheer volume of messages we get asking to meet today/tomorrow/soon. We're very clear as to our inability to do so in our profile. Does it stop requests? No. Does it result in us being called timewasters and being told we're on the wrong site? Yes. Does it bother us in the slightest? Not a bit.

If somebody's choice of how to run their profile or use the site doesn't meet your own - it's simple - move on.

Telling them they're wrong is pointless. And worrying about it even more so.

A"

Not really worried about it was just interested in discussing as that's what the forum is for I believe.

Like to hear both sides of the argument to give a balanced view, we realise thareare those that think people without pics are timewasters etc but its nice to read their reasons why

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As others have said, it's your profile to run how you want it. If you're getting what you want from Fab, or the scene in general, why change?

I have pics because as a 'lone' male on here I know I need them for any hope of a meet, not through any snobbishness or feeling I'm more genuine. As a couple you're finding you can get meetings arranged without them so it's all good

Ignore the nay-sayers and enjoy all you're getting from the site

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"As others have said, it's your profile to run how you want it. If you're getting what you want from Fab, or the scene in general, why change?

I have pics because as a 'lone' male on here I know I need them for any hope of a meet, not through any snobbishness or feeling I'm more genuine. As a couple you're finding you can get meetings arranged without them so it's all good

Ignore the nay-sayers and enjoy all you're getting from the site

"

Your not being snobbish you have pics for a reason and we understand that, but that's not our point, the snobbery comes from those that think because they have pics they are genuine those that don't are not x

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By *aywalton1Man  over a year ago

Walton on the Hill

In my case, I rarely contact people these days, but when I do, whether they have pictures or not is not the issue. I base it on the profile, what they are after, what they like, what they sound like, verifications. As long as they are willing to show face pictures before any meet, no problem.

Some people simply look at pictures and don't care about anything else. You are probably getting negative comments from those.

Bottom line, if their top priority is photos, call it a lucky escape.

Your profile is great by the way.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I have some pics on my profile because I only search for verified men with public pictures as I think it's only fair to have some of mine on display if I expect them to wink or message back. They're not full body shots [that would scare them away]

My face picture is for friends only. I only add friends once I've chatted at length and fairly sure a meet will take place sometime in the future

As others have said, run your profile how you want and let others worry about their own. If it works for you then all well and good

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"As others have said, it's your profile to run how you want it. If you're getting what you want from Fab, or the scene in general, why change?

I have pics because as a 'lone' male on here I know I need them for any hope of a meet, not through any snobbishness or feeling I'm more genuine. As a couple you're finding you can get meetings arranged without them so it's all good

Ignore the nay-sayers and enjoy all you're getting from the site

Your not being snobbish you have pics for a reason and we understand that, but that's not our point, the snobbery comes from those that think because they have pics they are genuine those that don't are not x"

What's your definition of 'genuine' ?

A

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"In my case, I rarely contact people these days, but when I do, whether they have pictures or not is not the issue. I base it on the profile, what they are after, what they like, what they sound like, verifications. As long as they are willing to show face pictures before any meet, no problem.

Some people simply look at pictures and don't care about anything else. You are probably getting negative comments from those.

Bottom line, if their top priority is photos, call it a lucky escape.

Your profile is great by the way. "

Thanks x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

why invest in all this pre`chatter when you dont even know what someone looks like

if it works for you fair enough

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"As others have said, it's your profile to run how you want it. If you're getting what you want from Fab, or the scene in general, why change?

I have pics because as a 'lone' male on here I know I need them for any hope of a meet, not through any snobbishness or feeling I'm more genuine. As a couple you're finding you can get meetings arranged without them so it's all good

Ignore the nay-sayers and enjoy all you're getting from the site

Your not being snobbish you have pics for a reason and we understand that, but that's not our point, the snobbery comes from those that think because they have pics they are genuine those that don't are not x

What's your definition of 'genuine' ?

A"

We don't have a definition of genuine as it takes many aspects, its what others believe is genuine or not, and from some comments we read on forums many believe those without pics are not genuine as some believe those without veris are not genuine, if they require pics or veris that's their choice but shouldn't accuse others of not being genuine just because they don't have the things on their profile which they like themselves.

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"As others have said, it's your profile to run how you want it. If you're getting what you want from Fab, or the scene in general, why change?

I have pics because as a 'lone' male on here I know I need them for any hope of a meet, not through any snobbishness or feeling I'm more genuine. As a couple you're finding you can get meetings arranged without them so it's all good

Ignore the nay-sayers and enjoy all you're getting from the site

Your not being snobbish you have pics for a reason and we understand that, but that's not our point, the snobbery comes from those that think because they have pics they are genuine those that don't are not x

What's your definition of 'genuine' ?

A

We don't have a definition of genuine as it takes many aspects, its what others believe is genuine or not, and from some comments we read on forums many believe those without pics are not genuine as some believe those without veris are not genuine, if they require pics or veris that's their choice but shouldn't accuse others of not being genuine just because they don't have the things on their profile which they like themselves."

I agree. Personally the word genuine makes me laugh.

But are people not as entitled to their views as you are?

In the world of internet based contact sites first impressions matter. To many this will include the ability to gauge interest and importantly attraction of the physical kind - pretty hard with no visuals.

This may mean - rightly or wrongly - that they view those not showing images in a different light to those that do. Likewise many will base decisions on text content of profiles. Little to go on? Not interested. Scenario not to their liking? Not interested. Hoops to jump through such as demands for face pics or phone numbers? Not interested. No veri's or no visible veri's? Not interested.

If people want to accuse others of not being 'genuine' it will be a decision based on their criteria - not yours.

There's bugger all you can do about it. And I'm sure we all have out own criteria and have made assumptions as to whether someone is 'genuine' or not.

Including both you and I !

A

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"As others have said, it's your profile to run how you want it. If you're getting what you want from Fab, or the scene in general, why change?

I have pics because as a 'lone' male on here I know I need them for any hope of a meet, not through any snobbishness or feeling I'm more genuine. As a couple you're finding you can get meetings arranged without them so it's all good

Ignore the nay-sayers and enjoy all you're getting from the site

Your not being snobbish you have pics for a reason and we understand that, but that's not our point, the snobbery comes from those that think because they have pics they are genuine those that don't are not x

What's your definition of 'genuine' ?

A

We don't have a definition of genuine as it takes many aspects, its what others believe is genuine or not, and from some comments we read on forums many believe those without pics are not genuine as some believe those without veris are not genuine, if they require pics or veris that's their choice but shouldn't accuse others of not being genuine just because they don't have the things on their profile which they like themselves.

I agree. Personally the word genuine makes me laugh.

But are people not as entitled to their views as you are?

In the world of internet based contact sites first impressions matter. To many this will include the ability to gauge interest and importantly attraction of the physical kind - pretty hard with no visuals.

This may mean - rightly or wrongly - that they view those not showing images in a different light to those that do. Likewise many will base decisions on text content of profiles. Little to go on? Not interested. Scenario not to their liking? Not interested. Hoops to jump through such as demands for face pics or phone numbers? Not interested. No veri's or no visible veri's? Not interested.

If people want to accuse others of not being 'genuine' it will be a decision based on their criteria - not yours.

There's bugger all you can do about it. And I'm sure we all have out own criteria and have made assumptions as to whether someone is 'genuine' or not.

Including both you and I !

A

"

Have to agree, and although we have preferences set we do not adhere strictly to them. We say we hate winks but sometimes after telling a guy not interested as he winked and not read profile hes replied with a nice witty remark and weve chatted and met so things are for guidance only and not set in stone

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