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Advice to single guys at clubs
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By *it of fun cpl OP Couple
over a year ago
village between York and Hull |
We have been to quite a few clubs over the years and know that single guys get a rough time on here and at clubs but to be honest most of them do themselves no favours.
At the majority of clubs we go to there is always a bar or seating area but there are never any single guys sat at them. They all seem to gather in the corridors or near the play areas hoping to get lucky. Not sure about you ladies but I know that I for one would like to say hi to a guy before he shags me!!
we like to sit and have a look who is around before deciding what we are going to do but we often think there are not many guys around untill we go to the play areas then you can not move for them! they all seem happy to chat to eachother in the corridors but if they actually went to the bar and chatted they would probably have a lot more fun.. well in our opinion anyway. So guys we do want you but make an effort please !! xxx |
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By *woBiTwoCouple
over a year ago
north manchester |
That mirrors our (limited) experience with clubs so far, and makes decent sense to us.  We found the bar/lounge area only catering for nervy-looking couples last time we went, and the single guys were all hanging around the playrooms and corridors.  |
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We totally concur, we were at a club Friday night and not one guy approached us. We were up for a bit of MMF for a bit of a treat for me (kaz). I went off to the loo a couple of times and thought the someone might have approached Paul but no..... Didn't think we were that off putting and I was smelling lovely!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Have to say that we have met some great guys at our local club,some of them we have known for years and although you do get lurkers in corridors we have chatted in the bar or the pool room to guys and got to know them,so seems a bit unfair to tar all guys with the same brush. |
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By *UNCHBOXMan
over a year ago
folkestone |
I agree with the thread - i used to go to a club on a regular basis, but got put off by the amount of singles who just hang around the playrooms, and make no effort to chat to the couples. Ive spoken to a few new couples who it was their first time at a club, and they were put off by it.
Ive always found couples to be very friendly on the whole if you make the effort at clubs. Do couples like a single guy to compliment them on their dress etc. I do with some couples but never too sure if most couples find this a bit forward?. |
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theres an area by the play rooms at the club i use which can become a bit of a wankers alley..however the staff there are superb at preventing people accumulating for the most part and closing off the loop that people patrol constantly on busy nights ( down past the playrooms, the hot tubs, out the door and round the back of the playrooms ..and repeat ! )
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By *it of fun cpl OP Couple
over a year ago
village between York and Hull |
"Have to say that we have met some great guys at our local club,some of them we have known for years and although you do get lurkers in corridors we have chatted in the bar or the pool room to guys and got to know them,so seems a bit unfair to tar all guys with the same brush."
We certainly do not Tar them all with the same brush at all that is why we said the majority.. We go to clubs to meet singles so we do not have a downer on them but we are just stating what has happend in our experiance |
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as a single i have done pretty well at clubs because if there are a lot of single guys in a certain area it means they are leaving other areas free!,it really is common sense to get to the bar/lounge area and start to converse and mix with people. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
funny enough having this exact conversation at the club I was at on saturday night......
there tend to be two types of blokes,
1) the guy that doesn't say boo to a goose all night, will wander around and follow couples, will loiter around the playing rooms and then if anything is happening they will be the first with there cocks out, basically hanging over any couple playing....
they don't get swinging at all... they are just there for an oppotunist shag if they are lucky......
and there is 2)
the guy who does just sit and talk to people, just have a general conversation, if fact they treat you like you are 2 human beings, and if anything happens then it happens... if it doesn't then at least you have had a good night meeting new people...
the guys who "get it" so to speak...
I know which one I am, and I get commented on all the time because of it....
I have had guys come up to me in clubs and say "wow you were lucky to play with couple x,y, and z.... how do you do it".... it just say to them "i just treat them like human beings rather than pieces of meat"
in a way I think that "greedy girl" nights has altered the way that some guys think... and then they think that Mixed nights will be the same when they normally are not....... |
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I think it can be really tough for singe guys in a club to know what to do and more often than not they are desperate not to be a pain but also know that being a wallflower doesnt work either.
i met two lovely new guys at the weekend, one who chatted in the hot tub and another who approached a small group of us on the saturday party saying he was new,unsure of the etiquette and not wanting to offend people without meaning to. It got him involved in a conversation, introduced him to a few people and last isaw of him he was happily chatting to a very pretty woman !
long live the friendly single guy  |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
the frustrating thing for me is that our local club tells new people exactly what not to do.... and has little cards all over the place advising of the best ways to chat to people... but it all seems to go in one ear and out the other....
I can't really complain.. the amount of times I have been asked to go and chat to people and explain it now is beyond me... maybe in effect it is good because at least this way you can tell the people who do "get it" with regards to swinging so to speak from those who don't.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fabio- what are the best ways to get chatting to people in clubs?
I always worry about offending people or seeming like I'm desperate to play.
Any tips would be very welcome. |
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"So far im getting closer to thinking that i really dont want to bother with a club at all "
oh!, don't say that lisa!,i was so hoping to bump into you sometime,somewhere so i that i could say a big HULLO to you!. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"So far im getting closer to thinking that i really dont want to bother with a club at all "
don't feel like that... there are guys who do go to clubs who do get it.. and will just chat and that is good....
what I tell couples who play is actually something really simple and gets the point to men across......
if you have a load of men around them, just announce that "you will only play with those who took the time to find out both your names before you came into the room"
watch the reaction of all the men then  |
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By *it of fun cpl OP Couple
over a year ago
village between York and Hull |
"So far im getting closer to thinking that i really dont want to bother with a club at all "
Dont say that.. They are a great place and this post was not intended to put people off.. Fabio has the right idea
x |
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By *habsMan
over a year ago
Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex |
Lol, A few times I've approached people and Said "Hiya, how you both doing,..hope you're enjoying your evening" with a smile on my face and for my troubles got "no thank you". Lol.
Must remember to get rid of that "Travelling after-shave salesman" sign. |
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"Lol, A few times I've approached people and Said "Hiya, how you both doing,..hope you're enjoying your evening" with a smile on my face and for my troubles got "no thank you". Lol.
Must remember to get rid of that "Travelling after-shave salesman" sign."
lol - it must be difficult! If we're approached we'll chat as we're nice people - unfortunately a lot of guys see that as a green light and assume that we'll play with them and can get a bit funny when you don't want to play. This means that we're now not as chatty as we used to be in clubs. It's a shame, a few spoiling it for the majority again! Z |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So far im getting closer to thinking that i really dont want to bother with a club at all
oh!, don't say that lisa!,i was so hoping to bump into you sometime,somewhere so i that i could say a big HULLO to you!. "
yes but id have to fight off the young lads, young girls, married twats without rings, married women without rings, couples that arent really couples as one half is married and single guys living in bedsits desperate for a shag, think i shall chat up the barstaff
sorry just seems pointless, so offputting with the comments made about who frequents them, i just want to have fun ffs  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lol, A few times I've approached people and Said "Hiya, how you both doing,..hope you're enjoying your evening" with a smile on my face and for my troubles got "no thank you". Lol.
Must remember to get rid of that "Travelling after-shave salesman" sign."
Does mean you smell loverly though |
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By *habsMan
over a year ago
Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex |
"Lol, A few times I've approached people and Said "Hiya, how you both doing,..hope you're enjoying your evening" with a smile on my face and for my troubles got "no thank you". Lol.
Must remember to get rid of that "Travelling after-shave salesman" sign.
lol - it must be difficult! If we're approached we'll chat as we're nice people - unfortunately a lot of guys see that as a green light and assume that we'll play with them and can get a bit funny when you don't want to play. This means that we're now not as chatty as we used to be in clubs. It's a shame, a few spoiling it for the majority again! Z"
It wouldn't be so bad (in fact, justified) if I was limping over drooling lecherously, but half the time I'm skipping along and passing by with a general "hullo, not stopping, just being polite" as I notice them sitting there with a look like a smacked arse on their face.. but hey, their loss right? Anyone that knows me knows if I wanna chat, I say so.. and if I wanna "chat in private" I make that very clear also |
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By *habsMan
over a year ago
Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex |
"Lol, A few times I've approached people and Said "Hiya, how you both doing,..hope you're enjoying your evening" with a smile on my face and for my troubles got "no thank you". Lol.
Must remember to get rid of that "Travelling after-shave salesman" sign.
Does mean you smell loverly though "
Oh my sense of smell is not what it used to be - but you can find out and tell me? xx |
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"Lol, A few times I've approached people and Said "Hiya, how you both doing,..hope you're enjoying your evening" with a smile on my face and for my troubles got "no thank you". Lol.
Must remember to get rid of that "Travelling after-shave salesman" sign.
lol - it must be difficult! If we're approached we'll chat as we're nice people - unfortunately a lot of guys see that as a green light and assume that we'll play with them and can get a bit funny when you don't want to play. This means that we're now not as chatty as we used to be in clubs. It's a shame, a few spoiling it for the majority again! Z
It wouldn't be so bad (in fact, justified) if I was limping over drooling lecherously, but half the time I'm skipping along and passing by with a general "hullo, not stopping, just being polite" as I notice them sitting there with a look like a smacked arse on their face.. but hey, their loss right? Anyone that knows me knows if I wanna chat, I say so.. and if I wanna "chat in private" I make that very clear also"
lol - that has painted a great picture for me! Z |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lol, A few times I've approached people and Said "Hiya, how you both doing,..hope you're enjoying your evening" with a smile on my face and for my troubles got "no thank you". Lol.
Must remember to get rid of that "Travelling after-shave salesman" sign.
Does mean you smell loverly though "
yes he does he hehe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Lol, A few times I've approached people and Said "Hiya, how you both doing,..hope you're enjoying your evening" with a smile on my face and for my troubles got "no thank you". Lol.
Must remember to get rid of that "Travelling after-shave salesman" sign.
Does mean you smell loverly though
Oh my sense of smell is not what it used to be - but you can find out and tell me? xx"
you're on  |
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"So far im getting closer to thinking that i really dont want to bother with a club at all
oh!, don't say that lisa!,i was so hoping to bump into you sometime,somewhere so i that i could say a big HULLO to you!.
yes but id have to fight off the young lads, young girls, married twats without rings, married women without rings, couples that arent really couples as one half is married and single guys living in bedsits desperate for a shag, think i shall chat up the barstaff
sorry just seems pointless, so offputting with the comments made about who frequents them, i just want to have fun ffs "
sure there are people from the catagories youve mentioned, but they will also be out there in other places too and they certainly arent the majority in any of the clubs Ive been to.
for the most part I have met bright, personable, respectful, sexy , genuinely fun men at clubs. More than able to hold a conversation and more than able to know when a situation may go further and when it will just be a chat. On the rare occasion someone has been a little persistent then its usually one of the other single guys that will have a word and remind them of what's acceptable.
meeting at home is not an option for me , and a huge benfit of a club is safety in numbers for me as a single woman plus the social ( and other ) contact with people who's company I enjoy.
clubs arent for everyone but please dont be put off by thinking they are full of the negative elements of swinging because they arent. Each will have a personality of its own and maybe , just maybe, you'd find one you'd enjoy visiting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So far im getting closer to thinking that i really dont want to bother with a club at all
oh!, don't say that lisa!,i was so hoping to bump into you sometime,somewhere so i that i could say a big HULLO to you!.
yes but id have to fight off the young lads, young girls, married twats without rings, married women without rings, couples that arent really couples as one half is married and single guys living in bedsits desperate for a shag, think i shall chat up the barstaff
sorry just seems pointless, so offputting with the comments made about who frequents them, i just want to have fun ffs
sure there are people from the catagories youve mentioned, but they will also be out there in other places too and they certainly arent the majority in any of the clubs Ive been to.
for the most part I have met bright, personable, respectful, sexy , genuinely fun men at clubs. More than able to hold a conversation and more than able to know when a situation may go further and when it will just be a chat. On the rare occasion someone has been a little persistent then its usually one of the other single guys that will have a word and remind them of what's acceptable.
meeting at home is not an option for me , and a huge benfit of a club is safety in numbers for me as a single woman plus the social ( and other ) contact with people who's company I enjoy.
clubs arent for everyone but please dont be put off by thinking they are full of the negative elements of swinging because they arent. Each will have a personality of its own and maybe , just maybe, you'd find one you'd enjoy visiting. "
Just a shame they are so far away from me now that my local one has closed |
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
On a serious note, this is what I find difficult about clubs too, and the responses of both "sides" demonstrates this...
couples are unapproached, or can be dismissive of a polite hello...
Men need to get into conversation, but without being pushy...and need to spot when they've outstayed their welcome OR be assertive enough to move the conversation along. They also have to not get caught up in the circling vultures if they go to explore a club they haven't been to before.
It's a tightrope walk, and no mistake...
.
.
.
.
.
(worth it though  ) |
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By *onny BonesMan
over a year ago
a block away from heaven |
I enjoy attending clubs, but was put off following the example of other single males. Most would come and say hi an complain that this club or that club is not what it used to be, then the questions about which other clubs I've attended blah blah blah. I soon realised that just like the forums on FAB most fun was had speaking to couples and single ladies with a more friendly attitude in welcoming good conversation and would entertain your comments regadless of being single. Whilst it is no good for my FAB reputation I have to admit to being one of the vultures, but always stopped short of being in the middle of cock alley, I was alway scared where they would let fly with their cum!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I go to clubs quite a lot as a single female, well i suppose i would seeing as i am a single female lol what annoys me is how guys never talk to you, they kind of spot me on my own and just watch waiting for me to move and when i do i feel like the pied bloody piper lol
What guys dont seem to realise is that im not going to go into a room and just get on a bed alone, i really need someone to approch me or show an interest so i can get things going, its easy for couples as they can play and people will join in, but theres no point at all just following me around while im alone lol
What else annoys me is how none of them will talk they all just follow, watch and wait till one guys does come over to me, then as soon as i start playing and they realise im 'up for it' they all just all dive on lol if they that interested in playing with me why didnt that come over and say hi? |
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