FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Are we timewasters?
Are we timewasters?
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By *ealfun OP Couple
over a year ago
darleston |
We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
"
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Each to there own, you have veris so carry on as you please, we don't personally think there are hard and fast rules on the way anyone uses the site as long as they are gen. x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say."
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone"
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet.."
So if you're having a full conversation with someone in a pub does that mean you'll get a shag? No. The same applies to here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet..
So if you're having a full conversation with someone in a pub does that mean you'll get a shag? No. The same applies to here"
Not if their chatting about meeting up,and then they dont... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet..
So if you're having a full conversation with someone in a pub does that mean you'll get a shag? No. The same applies to here
Not if their chatting about meeting up,and then they dont..."
People are allowed to change their mind's. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet..
So if you're having a full conversation with someone in a pub does that mean you'll get a shag? No. The same applies to here
Not if their chatting about meeting up,and then they dont...
People are allowed to change their mind's. "
People are allowed to change,their minds but that is still timewasting... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet..
So if you're having a full conversation with someone in a pub does that mean you'll get a shag? No. The same applies to here
Not if their chatting about meeting up,and then they dont...
People are allowed to change their mind's.
People are allowed to change,their minds but that is still timewasting..."
Not if they tell them a day or a few hours before that they've decided not to. |
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A timewaster in my mind, is someone who actually arranges a meet and then doesn't turn up without reasonable explanation.
I have chatted to many a forumite without feeling it will lead to a meet, but as the saying goes, talk is cheap  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The word timewasters means different things for different people. The only time I would ever say my time has been waster is if I turned up for a met and they didn't, luckily this has never happened.
If you chat to people and give the impression that you are going to meet but have no intention of doing so then I suppose you are a timewaster to a certain degree. However I can usually sus those people out fairly quickly and the conversation will come to an end. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I think tge only people that are timewaters are those who lead people on that they have no intention if meeting. Or people that fail to turn up when a meet is arranged.
That said, reading your post (and I may have misinterpreted it) I get tge impression when you say that you like to receive 'detailed messages about what you'd like to do to us but can't possibly reply to them all' - that could be construed as timewasting if you actively encourage those messages |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet..
So if you're having a full conversation with someone in a pub does that mean you'll get a shag? No. The same applies to here
Not if their chatting about meeting up,and then they dont...
People are allowed to change their mind's.
People are allowed to change,their minds but that is still timewasting..."
How is chatting on here time wasting? Do you just send a message asking to meet then expect a yes and just meet? Surely you'd chat to any potential meet to see if you're compatible and get on? In the course of chatting someone may say something off putting and that's that. The only time someone has truly wasted your time is when you've agreed a date and time, sorted time off, child care etc, spent time getting ready and then travelled to the venue only to have a no show. Just because you've entered into a conversation doesn't mean you've entered into a binding contract to meet them! Everyone is entitled to change their mind and after chatting to someone for a bit they may find they're not for them. As long as people play by the rules, they are free to run their profile as they wish.
Miss F |
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I think the response depends entirely on the individual. However we see an awful lot of people mentioning that their time has been wasted so we are quite careful and actually turn people down that we think we might meet if we knew a bit more about them because their profile says "no timewasters" and we like to exchange a few messages and meet socially first. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have similar problems with meeting. As my OH runs his own company, does not work a 9-5, has to put cclients and business first and works away a fair bit, then we find it near on impossible to set up meets in advance.
This is why we tend to stick to parties and clubs.
I am under no obligation to do anything, and I accept the same of others, therefore I couldn't really care less if people call me a timewater. I don't get up dates, times and venues oc I know I have no intention of meeting  |
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet.."
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet..
So if you're having a full conversation with someone in a pub does that mean you'll get a shag? No. The same applies to here"
Just as if you meet someone and you decide they are not for you. We are all consenting adults and consent can be withdrawn at any time for any reason. |
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"A timewaster in my mind, is someone who actually arranges a meet and then doesn't turn up without reasonable explanation.
I have chatted to many a forumite without feeling it will lead to a meet, but as the saying goes, talk is cheap "
This |
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By *eithoWoman
over a year ago
Chatham |
"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say."
How ridiculous, you couldn't possibly meet everyone you chat to, it'd be a full time job!
You're only a time waster if you arrange a meet, then don't meet for a non valid reason or you don't disclose something fundamental that may change the person wanting to meet way down the track. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet..
So if you're having a full conversation with someone in a pub does that mean you'll get a shag? No. The same applies to here
Just as if you meet someone and you decide they are not for you. We are all consenting adults and consent can be withdrawn at any time for any reason."
Exactly |
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet..
So if you're having a full conversation with someone in a pub does that mean you'll get a shag? No. The same applies to here
Just as if you meet someone and you decide they are not for you. We are all consenting adults and consent can be withdrawn at any time for any reason."
As far as I can see, it really depends on whether the OP has at any point in the online conversations explicitly suggested meeting, or agreed to meeting up, without the real intention of doing so. Everything else constitutes getting-to-know-you chat which is fine and is as it should be, but in no way can be construed as timewasting. |
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"So we're all time wasters if we change our minds not to meet the person we've arranged to meet  "
I'd say so. There's nothing wrong with changing your mind of course, but time has been wasted if a meet has been organised regardless of how little that is. |
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"So we're all time wasters if we change our minds not to meet the person we've arranged to meet
I'd say so. There's nothing wrong with changing your mind of course, but time has been wasted if a meet has been organised regardless of how little that is."
And this is what puts me off even replying to most the messages we get.. it's getting so stupid the amount if expectation people have on here.
On the flip side, when I just delete because i daren't speak for fear of being labelled a time waster because we can't meet anytime in the next month , we get abuse for being rude!!!
Hang on it sounded like I could give a monkeys for a second there..;)
Op do what you like, you'll be branded "something" whatever you do on here. Look out for the threads saying how unattractive it is to have loads of meets too....
Whatever you do someone will be annoyed you're not using the site how you want them too... Personally we'll have fun when we want to at our pace - not anyone else's. I encourage people to block us who think we should move with their agenda and terms.
This is supposed to be fun, if it happens it happens.
D |
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"We may get loads of negative responses but hey ho here goes.
We are a couple who have been happily playing for probably getting on for 20 years or so and have thoroughly enjoyed all types of play with guys girls couples and TVs but only get to have fun now and again due to normal everyday things gettting in the way.
We do visit Fab regularly and do mail/fab/wink loads of people we would love to play with but reality is that we will only get to meet and play with a tiny minority despite wishing things were different.
Although we do like to receive detailed mails pics and ideas about playing we cannot possibly reply to all especially the one liners with no pics.
Many people seem to find it objectionable to receive lots of mails/winks and fabbed pics but we are not bothered and to us it just increases the playing possibilities and find it a "turn on" even if it is unlikely that we will ever meet.
Are we alone in our viewpoint.
You are Timewasters if you have started chatting to a person/couple,and their expecting a meet will come from it,and then you dont...Sorry to say.
Should never expect a meet just because you message someone
That is true,but there is a difference from messaging someone,to having full conversations,which may seem to be leading up to a meet..
So if you're having a full conversation with someone in a pub does that mean you'll get a shag? No. The same applies to here
Just as if you meet someone and you decide they are not for you. We are all consenting adults and consent can be withdrawn at any time for any reason."
That's the best comment so far. If I go to meet someone, I go with the thinking, if it happens it happens, if it don't it don't, and I've had some really good meets that have just been socials. |
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